YAAARH! I AM HERE!

My presence here is a festive occasion because I. Am. FINALLY. Done. With. My. Homework. Congrats to moi!

Disclaimer: I do not own KWMS in any way. If I did, I'd have Hinata and Yukimura make out every episode, with Kanou and Igarashi in the next room. Of course, Usui and Misaki would be doing the same thing in the next.

And now we shall see Hot Lord Usui and Scary Commoner Misaki in this chapter.

"Usui-sama, there are a total of seventeen ladies wishing to become your wife today," informed an old, nervous man, bowing almost ninety degrees.

Usui fiddled with a toy he had gotten from Britain: a compass. He would turn it this way and that, and the little red needle would scurry to stubbornly point north with each sharp turn of his fingers.

"Please be ready in ten minutes, Usui-sama," said the old servant.

Usui yawned. Sure, sure. He'd have to be there.

"I shall go then, Usui-sama." Seriously, couldn't he leave him alone?

The servant bowed again (though Usui couldn't see how the guy could afford to go any lower) and turned for the door, glad to exit the unresponsive lord's room.

"Oh, wait."

The servant looked back fearfully.

"Could I see the list?"

The servant sighed in relief. He hadn't done anything to anger Usui-sama after all.

"Here it is, Usui-sama."

Usui looked down the carefully recorded paper. Hanazono, Fujiwara, Higarashi. No Ayuzawa. He sighed.

"Take it away." Usui resumed playing with the compass.

The old servant bowed, almost prostrating, and left the room.

XXX

"100 for onee-san not being chosen," said Suzuna, dropping a bag of coins into their circle.

"200 for Misaki being chosen," challenged Sakura, pushing in a slightly larger bag.

Shizuko's glasses flashed in the light. "You are both very foolish, Suzuna-san, Sakura-san," she said, putting in the biggest bag. "300 for Misaki not being chosen, but catching the lord's attention."

The three girls glared at each other, tension raging. The game was on!

To say that Misaki was irritated would be an understatement.

It was more like, the temperature of Misaki's anger surpassed that of a Californian cement side walk in summer. You can literally fry eggs on the sidewalk there.

So, back to Misaki's irritation.

She was sitting in a long room full of ladies. Each kimono-clad woman sat on a separate tatami mat. The air was hot. And humid. And attracting mosquitos. And freakishly annoying.

Misaki yearned to scratch at her neck, where her skin was also getting irritated by the newly starched collar. But the powder Sakura had so meticulously placed on her neck ("You never know where he'll look" she had said with a wink) would fall off, so casually scratching at the back of her neck was not an option.

Misaki hoped the lord was not a stupid, perverted man who took pleasure in looking at the necks of women.

A tiny, slight man who looked like the smallest breeze would topple him over entered. A lord entered behind him.

Sakura's description had been fairly accurate. Blond hair, green eyes, and a princely posture. However, Misaki's squealing friend had not told her that the lord looked so dull.

His eyes were half-opened, like he had just woken from a thousand-year slumber. He might've yawned if it were not for the very very nervous man at his side.

"Ladies, we shall begin the auditions. When your name is called, pleae some up and brew a cup of tea. Thank you."

Misaki groaned. Not tea. Tea was the worst. Every time she tried to pour a cup of the hot liquid, she'd break the teapot, cup, or any other part of the delicate tea set that wasn't fastened on to the ground. And even if she managed to not break the porcelain, Suzuna would taste it and promptly throw it out, saying that it tastes exactly like cat droppings. (Misaki did not, nor did she wish to, know how Suzuna had tasted the offending thing.)

"Fujiwara Aiko-sama," called the old servant.

A sweet, shy girl wearing a pale green kimono stood up and came forward. With trembling hands, the girl managed to grind the tea, shake it with hot water, and successfully pour out a hot cup of tea. Misaki was suddenly envious of the girl.

The lord received the cup, wet his lips with it, and smiled. He then leaned towards the girl to whisper something in her ear. The girl stiffened, then murmured something embarrassedly back.

Misaki's eyes shot open. Was the bastard harrassing the poor girl? Her contempt for the man grew stronger with every passing minute.

After she was done, the shy little Fujiwara Aiko scurried back to her seat, her face red with embarrassment.

"Yukiko-sama," called the feeble voice.

Misaki's jaw dropped. The famous geisha had come all the way here to become the lord's wife?

Sure enough, a tall beauty stood up with all the air of a top geisha. She strutted forward, her hips outlined under the dark red fabric of her lavish kimono.

Yukiko wasn't as skilled as the first girl in serving tea, but Misaki had to admit she was good at multitasking. Yukiko smiled flirtatiously while grinding tea, pulled a loose strand of hair out of her face while shaking the pot, and made sure there was just enough skin exposed at her collar while pouring the final liquid out.

Misaki was impressed by the lord's attitude. He wasn't looking deliriously happy that The Yukiko had taken an interest in him, nor did he seem angry by her insolence. He looked amused, like one would when looking at a young child play.

When the cup of tea was offered, the lord sipped it, and again leaned forward and whispered something in the woman's ear. Unlike Fujiwara Aiko, Yukiko giggled and shot back a response, the same sultry smile playing on her lips.

Yukiko's time was over. Another was called.

Had it been hours? Days? Misaki couldn't remember. But she did know that the whole thing was pointless and boring and stupid and annoying.

Lucky number 17. "Hanazono Sakura-sama."

Misaki managed to not trip on her kimono. She cautiously made tea under the lord's scrutiny, more concerned about breaking the tea set than the lord's eyes.

Finally, Misaki managed not to break the delicate porcelain. She almost cried when she poured the tea out. But there was no way to know the taste.

The lord received the tea, sipped it, and smiled. It was the same smile Suzuna would flash when the tea was especially disgusting. I'm toast, she thought.

"You have a...way with tea, Hanazono-san," he said smiling.

"I apologize for the taste, lord," she said stiffly, not at all sorry. Serves you right for corrupting poor, innocent young girls.

"But I must say, Hanazono-san, you yourself look lovely. Your pink paint is especially appealing..." he said, leaning forward. He whispered the rest of the sentence in her ear. "...but is your koshimaki as pink as your paint?"

Misaki froze. All her contempt and disgust for this pathetic excuse of a man came tumbling down at once. Before she could stop herself, her hand lashed out...

SPLASH!

...and spilled the disgusting tea all over the lord's face.

"You stupid, perverted, horrible bastard! I hope you rot in hell!" she shouted, rising up in fury. She stormed out of the room, nearly stumbling on her long skirts.

After the dramatic exit of the last woman, everyone in the room was silent. Only the elcerly servant came to the lord and said, "My lord, are you all right? Should I bring the lady?"

The lord shook his head, smiling. "No, I'm fine. That was...Hanazono Sakura-san, right?"

"The nerve of the guy! Asking about a woman's koshimaki! I hope he gets run over by a horse!" grumbled Misaki, hoisting up her long skirts as she stormed down the road. The carriage Sakura had lent her wasn't here yet, because she had left too early. So that meant she had to walk the whole way home on foot. Misaki cursed her luck. First, Sakura forces me into a dress, and now my stupid shoes kill me...

Thought Misaki preferred to go straight home, she decided to drop by at Sakura's. She had the kimono and all, and it would be good to persuade her about how much of a bastard the lord was.

When she got to the Hanazono mansion, there was a huge carriage in front of the gate, conveniently blocking the way. Misaki grumbled as she squeezed herself in. Strange, Sakura was rich, but not enough to afford such a luxurious carriage...

A servant ushered her into Sakura's room. Upon entering the room, Misaki's jaw touched the floor.

"You!"

A blue-robed lord, with that arrogant smirk on his face, sat across Sakura.

"Hello, Ayuzawa-san."

Misaki turned to Sakura. "Sakura! What the heck is that bastard doing here?"

Sakura glared at her. "Oh, be quiet, Misaki! He's here because he wanted to meet you! It's a great opportunity! HOLD ONTO IT!"

The lord cleared his throat audibly.

Sakura turned her attention back to said hot lord. "Oh, please don't mind Misaki. She's just shy."

"I am not! I just want to kill him!" said Misaki, her eyes shooting lasers.

Sakura glared her almighty, Evil Glare of Doom. "I'll let you two talk in private. Misaki, behave, or else."

Misaki flinched, clearly feeling intimidated by the evil look.

Sakura went out of the room, closing the screen door behind her.

The lord smiled. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Ayuzawa-san. You caught my attention today."

Misaki glared, though less in intensity than Sakura's. "What the hell are you here for?"

"I wanted to meet you after your, ah, interesting performance later."

"That was your fault, you sick pervert! Go rot in hell!"

The lord sighed. "Have I offended you much?"

Misaki nodded vigorously. "Very."

"Then would you allow me to make it up to you?"

Misaki did not respond, but sent a questioning glare to the lord. Note, though it is questioning, it was still a glare.

"Have you been educated?"

Misaki's eyes narrowed. Was this bastard questioning her intelligence? "I am literate, if that's what you mean."

"I mean at a school."

Misaki shook her head. "I'm too poor to enroll in one."

"Then would you like to be taught by myself?"

Misaki gawked. "You? A private tutor? All you'll teach me is how to open a woman's kimono!"

The lord's face fell. "You really are angry at my comment?"

"Well, duh."

He smiled again. It was infurating! "You are fluent in English, I presume?"

"I guess."

"I've attended a school in Britain. Have you heard of Oxford?"

Misaki's eyes grew wide. "Ok-su-fa-do? That brilliant school let you attend?"

The lord smiled. "Looks are deceiving, Ayuzawa-san. I'm smarter than I look."

"Then do you like reading literature?"

Misaki nodded.

"Do you read much?"

Misaki shrugged. "It's not that easy to get books when you're a commoner."

"Then will you allow me to teach you to read some?"

"D-do you have a lot of books?" asked Misaki excitedly.

"Shelves and shelves, all waiting for you, my lady."

Misaki scoffed at the nickname, but the temptations of books were too much to bear. "Fine, then."

The lord stood. "Then I'll see you tomorrow, student."

He bowed and exited the room. Sakura came in a split second later. "What'd he say? What'd he say? Is he asking for your hand in marriage?"

Misaki made a face. "Ew. No. He wants to 'educate' me or something."

Sakura's eyes grew hazy with faraway possibilities. "'Educate', huh... It's not big, but it's a start, a start..."

XXX

"Shizuko!" Sakura wailed as a bespectacled girl took away her bag of gold.

"That's your fault for being to much of a romanticist, Sakura-san."

"And I get my money back," said Suzuna, holding her bag of gold as if it were a baby.

Sakura looked up, after recovering from her loss. "Then is Operation: Renew Misaki's Love Life still ongoing?"

Shizuko and Suzuna looked at each other. "Yes," they said in unison.

How was it? Good? Bad? Evil?

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Luvs ya,

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