Rose breathed a sigh of relief as she stepped onto dry land. Since Titanic sailing had never been one of her favourite activities. This voyage, much like the one to Europe when America had joined the war, had been spent consuming as much alcohol as possible.
She grabbed her single suitcase and made her way through the crowded New York pier, intent on finding a cab.
Jack's wound had never healed the way it should have and so the doctor had decided that he wouldn't be fit to return to the front line and sent home. That had been late September. It had been another two months before the war had finally ended.
It had been two months spent nursing the pain from the loss of her husband as well as missing Jack.
Jack was the love of her life, there was no doubt about it. But Andrew had still been her husband, she hadn't felt the same intensely overpowering love for him as she had Jack, that was the kind of love one only felt once in a lifetime if they were lucky, but she had cared for him. And to lose him so tragically…
She shook her head and focused her thoughts on finding transport. She was interrupted however, by a loud familiar voice calling her name.
Confused she turned in the direction of the voice and grinned when she recognised Molly Brown fighting her way through the crowd towards her.
Rose made her way over to the older woman and when they finally met found herself been pulled into a rib crushing hug. "Rose! It's so good to see you! I couldn't believe it when Jack told me. Where ya been girl?"
"I've been around" She glanced around expectantly "Where is Jack?"
The smile faded from Molly's "he's at home. Didn't he tell you he was sending me?"
"No. He never said a word" They had been exchanging letters since he had left Europe.
"Well he's at home in bed. He developed pneumonia not long after he got back to the states, its really hit him hard"
Luckily they had made it to Molly's car by then so Rose was able to reach her trembling hand out and use it to balance herself "Oh God" her breathing was becoming shallow and she felt the beginnings of a familiar panic building within her.
"Oh God, Oh God" she moved her hands up to her neck scratching wildly as she gasped desperately for breath
"Rose darlin' he's gonna be fine. The doctor says he's just taking a bit longer to recover is all." Molly's voice sounded like it was coming through a long tunnel
"No!" she gasped desperately "he can't die. I can't lose him Molly. Not again. Not after" she was sobbing now, her legs had long since given way and she lay collapsed on the ground gasping desperately for air. A few passers by stopped and stared at her but she didn't notice them.
Suddenly she felt Molly thrust a brown paper bag at her "breathe through this darlin. That's right deep breaths" she rubbed gently circles on her back and held the bag against Rose's mouth. It had been years since Rose had felt anything resembling motherly comfort and she leaned into Molly's touch gratefully as her breathing became less erratic.
"Are you alright darlin?" Molly asked her voice laced with concern. Rose reached up and brushed the tears from her cheeks and nodded
"I'm fine" she let out a nervous laugh "Sorry about that"
"Don't apologise darlin'. Come on lets go home I'm sure you're dying to see him."
"And kill him" Rose muttered under her breath, making Molly laugh.
Rose's eyes widened as Molly let them into her penthouse apartment, it had been years since she had been surrounded by such opulence as she explained to Molly when she questioned the look.
Molly directed her in the direction of Jack's room and she headed towards his room. Taking a deep breath she knocked on the door, wincing as she heard his violent cough, and let herself into the room.
"Jack Robert Dawson" Jack who had been attempting to draw, jumped up, thinking at first that it was Molly, his eyes widening in shock when he realised that it was in fact Rose standing in the doorway, arms folded across her chest looking both scary and adorable at the same time, if that was even possible.
"What were you thinking. We've been writing each other for how long and you never even felt compelled to mention your potentially life threatening illness?"
"It's not life threatening" he attempted, but he knew it was a feeble attempt, the look on his face only served to confirm it.
"I worked as a nurse on the front line Jack. Do you have any idea how many perfectly healthy men I've seen die because of pneumonia and all you can say to me is that its not life threatening" she was pacing the length of the room by now, her arms flailing wildly "I mean, what if you had died Jack? Then where would I be" she continued to pace the length of the room and suddenly for some inexplicable reason started yelling at him in French.
He watched her, momentarily stunned by her outburst. "Rose!" he yelled as loudly as he could manage in his weakened state before bursting into a coughing fit.
But it managed to catch her attention and she stopped pacing coming to halt at the end of his bed. "Rose, come here" he patted the edge of his bed when he had finally recovered. She bit her lip and he was struck by how vulnerable she looked, it was the same look Maddie got when she though there were monsters in her closet.
"What if I hurt you?"
Jack smiled a soft, reassuring smile "You won't"
Reluctantly she moved and perched on the edge of his bed as far away from his body as possible.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I wanted to I did. But you were in Europe and you've already got so much on your mind. I didn't want to worry you anymore. But I promise you I'm not dying Rose"
"Don't make promises you can't keep Jack"
"Okay. I'll do my best not to die. I've made it this far. I'm not about to die now if I can help it"
Rose tried to laugh but it came out as a strangled sob. Jack pulled her into his arms and rubbed gentle circles on her back as she sobbed. "Shhh it's okay. Everything's gonna be alright"
Lay they like that for a while before Rose finally managed to pull herself together. She sat up smoothed her hair and attempted to brush the tears off her cheeks "Sorry. God I'm sorry, you must think I'm a blubbering idiot. I even got your shirt wet" she let out a weak laugh.
Jack smiled and brushed a stray strand of hair from her face "I have a six year old, I'm used to tears. Are you okay?"
"I will be. I'm just… My heads a bit of a mess these days and" Jack pressed his fingers to her lips, effectively silencing her
"I know, and that's okay. But you know that I'm here for you if you ever need to talk."
"I know. Well, I should let you get some rest…" she was cut off however by a young girl, Madeleine, she assumed running into her father's room.
"Daddy, daddy guess what?" she exclaimed loudly, her voice full of excitement, she stopped short when she saw Rose
"Who are you?" she asked shortly folding her arms over her chest.
"Maddie, this is Rose" Jack said, a warning tone in his voice "My… uh friend" he glanced at her nervously, they hadn't gotten round to discussing terms for each other yet.
Maddie eyed Rose wearily making her feel mildly uncomfortable. Immediately she jumped up and excused herself "Rose you don't have to go…"
"No it's fine Jack, you two should spend some time together, I should go talk to Molly" with a chaste kiss on his forehead she left the room, vaguely aware of Maddie's eyes tracking her until the door clicked shut.
She stood leaning against the door for moment, breathing in and out "Get a hold of yourself woman" she told herself, giving herself a swift mental kick she made her way down the hall through the large apartment until she found Molly sitting at a large island in the middle of a large kitchen.
"There you are darlin'" she pushed a plate with a sandwich on it in her direction "figured you might be hungry"
Rose smiled gratefully and immediately began devouring the sandwich, she had been to nervous to eat much on the journey over.
"So darlin', tell me. What have you been doing with yourself all these years?"
"Well, uh I was working in some off- Broadway plays for about eighteen months, and one of the directors said that I had an 'incredible' talent and that his brothers directed moving pictures in California, I was getting restless in New York by that point, so I packed up and headed for the horizon" she smiled softly to herself.
Molly stared at her incredulously "How many have you done? I'm not one for the movies but you're names never been in the paper or any of the magazines"
"5 to date. Yes, I was still paranoid about my mother or Cal finding me so I changed my name to Lilly Andrews."
"Wow. You've certainly had quite the exciting life" Molly grinned.
Yes, Rose thought to herself, glancing in the direction of Jack's room. I made it count.