Opps nearly forgot it again: disclaimer- I do not own Twilight or any of the characters, they belong to the magical Mrs Stephanie Meyer, without her, the vampire world will never be the same :)

Hello!

Update for you:)

I'm not sure what to say so: just hope you enjoy and feed me my brain food :)

It wasn't long before I realise that he is looking at me and holding me in his gaze.

"You're under the Cullen's charms as well, huh?" Peter came up behind me. "Cunning Cullen's and the Denali's." He chuckled like it was a joke.

"Huh?" I turned my head to tell him that he has got my attention.

"Well, since their first day here, everyone's attention has been on them, they're called the Hollywood of Alaska high, without all the drama though, they sort of keep to themselves." He lift up his hand to gesture for me to go first. My feet began to sludge through the thick layer of white stuff.

"Who are they? Exactly?"

"Well Dr Cullen and his wife and their adopt children moved down just about a month ago, they're both young, they're in their early twenties. And the kids, just the few years younger than them. The bronzed hair guy, who you were staring at, was Edward Cullen." Edward, I stifled a laugh, what are the odds, nearly the same face, same features, around the same age with the same name too. Peter lifted his eye brows trying to figure out what I was laughing at. He mouthed a 'what'.

"Nothing, just that I know someone who has got the same name too, and they sort of look the same."

"Boyfriend?"

"No"

By the end of the conversation we reached a table labelled 'Student office'. He introduced me to a petite lady and waved me off.

"Hello dear, welcome to East Alaska High, I have a slip here for you to get the teachers I will be taken lessons with to sign." Because it was my first day here, I was required to be in the full day. "And I want to introduce to you the options we have here. Now, we have three options: one is the current one that you're introduced to already, you do two hours a day five days a week. Or there's the second option where you come to school for a full day and a half per a week. Or the last one, kind of like home schooled, the teachers would organise the work for you and you get the work done send it in and get them marked." She smiled to me, reminding me of Mrs Cooper back at Forks high school.

"Um, I think I'll be alright with the one I've already been offered thanks." But I've made a mental note of the options for just in case.

"Ok dear" she then handed me a map of the school and my schedule, and gave me directions on which route to take is the best, and the most warming route, which, I am forever in her debt as I realise how much the difference makes. The temperature, is just not great for me, too cold, even for a person raised in place that are supposed to be cold many days of the year.

My day has a down side as I have been around school seeing Edward Cullen, with his family and friends. The guy who looks just like the Edward I knew for all my life. Both their face is just too alike to stop my imagination going wild. Every time I see his face, it just made me question whether or not Edward is well or not. Whether he is feeding himself often enough. And has his tears stopped yet.

The routine of going to school, seeing an Edward, being reminded of my Edward constantly and then searching for him none stop continued for a few weeks. Until Renée rang from Forks.

"Bella, darling, You've got quite a few letters in the post. And I think one of them is from Edward from the looks of the handwriting."

"Mom! Really! Um, can you open it and read it for me please?"

"Bella, let me finish girl! I've actually sent it a few days ago to Alaska to Aunt Clara's place. You should get it within the few days." The news of hearing from Edward has somehow woke me up, like I was in dreamland in the past weeks, there was nothing to focus on or try hard on being normal on. The only thing that had me going was the need to prove to mom and dad that they're nearly seventeen year old daughter could be herself without the boy from her childhood- which I am having trouble to convince them and myself. And the need to see him again. I feel useless, like I could not do without him, earlier in my life I have never needed to worry about it, but I guess I have been taking things for granted too much.

"Bella... Bella... Are you still there, or do I need to call an ambulance for you all the way up in Alaska? You're freaking me out here. ISABELLA MARIE SWAN! If you don't answer me the next second I'm going to really be running around in the..."

"Mom.. Mom.. I'm still here, I'm sorry I was deep in thought." I could actually imagine Renée running around even now. She is known for jumping the gun. "Actually, mom, I'm a little bit behind with some stuff, can I call you back later? And it's going to be twelve thirty at night soon, I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you when I get back with double chocolate milkshake" With my mom, you could do a lot of making up to her with the smallest things. And the fact that she is still so young at heart, it's easy to brighten her days with just milk and cookies and some talk time. I said my goodbyes and hanged up. Went to said good night to Aunt Clara and Uncle Nick, and I went to bed.

I ended up as usual dreaming of Edward. It started to became more intense when I first seen Edward Cullen. In my dreams, his skin is not soft any more, and he always seems to be depressed, it seems like he was worried. And the fact that we are always in the centre of a forest bed, where the sun is blocked is quite abnormal. But I didn't care, it was the only place to see him and hear him. This came to an end when little Annie came in banging my door against its frame.

"Bella bear bear! You've got mail!" And she handed me a white envelope with Edward's perfect hand script on.

"Thank you Annie."

"You're welcome, open!"

"Sure will!" I said ruffling her hair, which she seems to like. When the envelope's mouth was half opened I found my hands trembling. The result of not knowing what to expect, but I eagerly opened it as I am too desperate to care.

Dear Bella,

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Nothing can I ever say would forgive me for the sin I have committed. You may have heard that my parents are now dead. And so was my heart when I was by their sides. But she stood by me, the only reason I have not broken up was because of her. She is the reason why I'm still sane and whole now. I'm sorry. I can not love you anymore. I'm sorry. I promise you will not see me nor hear from me ever again. Nothing can I say would ever stop myself from hating myself. But one thing that I want from you, out of greed, and from the deepest in my heart, please, stay well. And love yourself, don't give up faith in love. I promise love will find its way back to you again. I'm sorry I could not give you my love. I'm sorry.

Edward.

I find my visions blurred with ripping noises coming from my chest. Edward, my love has abandoned me.

Confusing right? What has happened! Hasn't Edward forgotten Bella? So whats with the 'found someone else' letter?

Feed me my brain food and you'll find out sooner :)

Until then, stay well :)