Chapter Three
WHEN I WAKE UP THE NEXT MORNING, I feel tired and unmotivated. It occurs to me that I have to meet Al at the music store in about an hour. Reluctantly, I get out of bed and shuffle to the bathroom. My reflection in the mirror shows a tumultuary appearance and a lack of self esteem. What am I doing? I don't actually want to work. I only want the satisfaction that comes with getting the job. It's all fun and games until you start your first day. I make a face at my messy hair and comb it vigorously into a side braid, hating every moment of it.
I grab an apple on my way out, and start walking in the direction of the music store. The weather is hot and sunny today, and it makes me regret wearing the dark jeans I brought over from Phoenix. I would have worn my usual shorts and a t-shirt, but I thought jeans would better embody the professional vibe I intended to give. Luckily, I paired my jeans with the white button down blouse I borrowed from my mom. It is light and comfortable, perfect for a stroll in the dry summer air.
Finally, I approach the music store and make a run for the door. As I step inside, I am greeted by the cold air flowing out of a vent in the ceiling. Relieved, I take a few seconds to calm down and slow my heart beat from the short sprint that occurred only moments earlier. When I have calmed down enough to speak again, I make my way toward the register. I glance around the store and stop in my tracks, like a deer in the midst of a headlight. My heartbeat, which had barely returned to normal, is racing again. My hands are sweating and my breath is caught in my throat. I swallow hard. My neighbor looks up from behind the register, and stares me down with his brilliant brown eyes. I am paralyzed with fear; I can't look away from his intense gaze. I notice that he has small, gold flecks dancing around the iris in each eye. The metallic glow holds my attention and traps me.
We stare at each other for what seems like an eternity, when I hear the door open at the front of the store. My neighbor looks away from me and toward the sound. My body immediately relaxes, and I exhale deeply. I turn around and find Al walking to the register. He wears a big smile upon his face as he greets both of us.
"Good Morning Jake!" Al nods his head in Jake's direction.
"Morning Kate." He says, with a gentle voice.
Al moves past me and walks around the counter, behind the register. He unlocks a cabinet under the counter and disappears for a moment. Jake moves his eyes to meet mine and I feel completely helpless. Al stands up again and hands me a paper packet, complete with the names of all the records in the store. I grab it with shaky hands, feeling all of my strength drain away.
"Okay. Let's get started." Al says, excitedly.
"Kate, this is Jake. He has helped me run the store for a few years now. If you have any questions, you can ask him. He is always willing to help." Al says, endearingly.
He looks at Jake with a smile. Jake does not return it. Instead, his gaze has turned from a look of hostility to one of confusion. Perhaps he is not capable of looking happy. Al takes me around the store, showing me each isle of music. He tells me about the history of the store and the rather simple set up of music within it. He points to my packet often, showing me the titles of artists and albums located under each genre. My job is to align the records in alphabetical order under each category. Al prepares me well and informs me that I will be working alongside Jake for the duration of his trip to Georgia. I am afraid, but I try not to show it. I put on my best poker face and attempt to connect to the courageous side of me. I don't look at Jake, but I can feel his burning stare on my back.
After thirty minutes, Al leaves me on my own to organize the records. I sneak behind the isle closest to the door, as it is the one farthest from Jake. For the first time today, I feel a sense of security. Al comes by me one more time to check on my work. He approves my organizational skills and returns to the register.
A surprising amount of people come through the store over the course of the day. I thought this was an off-the-grid music store, but I realize now that it is extremely popular amongst music lovers. I asked a few customers where they were from. Some answered local; others told me they came from Santa Fe and even Colorado Springs. Eventually, customers stopped coming as frequently, which indicated that the peak hour for music searching was over. We closed up the store at three o' clock. I did a final sweep over the glossy wooden floors while Jake and Al counted the money in the register. They calculated the profits made from today and declared it a good day.
Internally, I declared it a good day too. Jake seemed to loosen up after a few hours, which made me more comfortable. He even came over to talk to me a few times. Granted, it was to double check the records. But his hostility toward me had evaporated, leaving me slightly confused, but largely relieved.
As the three of us exited the store, Al addressed Jake and me in a serious tone.
"I'll be leaving for Georgia tomorrow morning. Kate, you have shown to me that you are responsible and capable of keeping the store going while I'm away. Jake, the same goes for you; I am leaving you in charge. Don't pester Kate to much while I'm gone." He says with a laugh.
"Don't worry." Jake says. "I'll take care of the store. And Kate. But mostly, the store." He grins at Al, and playfully nudges my arm with his elbow.
"Take care, kids." Al says, and waves a final goodbye as he walks to his beaten pick-up truck and drives away.
Jake and I are still standing in front of the store long after Al has left. I can't find the courage to look at him, even though he has proved himself to be easy going. I know that I should at least say goodbye, but my tongue has escaped me. My mind is not capable of forming words. His cologne is making my head dizzy again. When I find the strength to look up at him, I discover that he is already looking down at me. A feeling of uneasiness settles in my stomach. Why does he have to be so beautiful? My heart is almost broken because I want to know him, to find out his innermost secrets and fears. I want to know what makes him tick. But he is so overwhelming. And my dream told me that he was dangerous; that I should stay away. Suddenly, I feel sick and rigidly walk away from him, in the direction of my house. To my surprise, he trots right up next to me and makes me jump.
"Kate." He says. "Wait for a second."
My heart skips a beat. I've never heard him say my name before. It sounded heavenly, like his angelic lips were meant to say my name a thousand times. I turn around to face him.
"Hi." I say, breathlessly. I should have said something more, but his image left me speechless.
Jake seems unfazed by my lack of composure.
"Can I walk you home?" He asks politely.
"Sure." I respond, with a shy smile. "We do live right next to each other."
"Okay." He stops walking for a moment. I turn around to look at him. He looks serious, like he has something on his mind.
"Kate, I just wanted to apologize for the other day. I had an argument with my mom and she pushed me farther than I wanted to go. I'm sorry for snapping at you."
I am speechless for a few moments, and can only manage a wary gaze in his direction. He reads the emotion in my eyes and begins to smile. He is infectious. I smile too and feel myself coming back.
"I thought you didn't want me to know about your personal business." I retort, with newfound confidence. I smirk at him and begin walking. I secretly note a small victory in my mind.
"Well it's probably in your best interest that you don't know about my crazy parents and their ideas for me. You might run away from me."
Run away? He doesn't realize that I'm a fish already caught on his hook. I couldn't run away even if I wanted to.
"I wouldn't." I reply, completely serious. "Run away, I mean."
He looks at me with wonder and a slow smile spreads across his face. My breath hitches again and my throat closes up. My face flushes a bright red color and I look away, towards the water that runs parallel to the dirt path.
By now, we have reached the white gate that opens to our neighborhood. I hesitate, unsure whether I should open it or not. Jake takes the liberty of opening it for me. It is difficult for me to process Jake's sudden change from hostile to friendly. I move with caution, afraid that he might snap back into the angry version of himself that I met only days earlier.
When we reach my house, I turn around to look at him one more time. Our eyes meet and I immediately feel myself becoming entrapped by his stare. The gold flecks continue to dance around his eyes. I count five little metallic specs, each a different shape and size. He blinks and I make an escape, looking towards the ground.
"I'll see you tomorrow, then." Jake says, in a rather gentle voice.
I look up to see the uneasiness that has appeared in his eyes. Now that I have seen Jake when he is happy, I never want to see his eyes filled with anger or worry. I only want to see him smile.
"Tomorrow, then." I reply, hoping to settle the unwelcome emotion in his eyes.
With a smile, I turn and walk through the flowered stucco arch that leads into the courtyard. When I open the door to my house, I step inside and close it slowly, careful not to make too much noise. I lean against the door and exhale the breath I have been holding since I said goodbye to Jake. I slide to the ground and stare over my knees into the center of the house, completely overwhelmed.