Why do I keep doing this to myself? Elizabeth asked herself every night and every morning she had spent on Atlantis. She was with this amazing guy who she cared about, but still she wished so hard sometimes that she was in John's arms rather than Graham's when he held her. She had liked him way before she started dating Graham (as close to dating as they could manage in a foreign city).
She got herself into the situation, and she knew that if she tried to get out of it, someone would get hurt. She knew her heart wasn't completely in the relationship like his was, and it wasn't fair to him. Recently, she even found herself refusing his gestures of affection slightly. She had a dark suspicion that deep down, she would gladly oblige to anything John suggested or even initiate thing she would never want to do with Graham. This feeling of guilt she felt approaching was the only thing holding her back from breaking her relationship off with Graham and running into the arms of the man she had truly loved for so long. She had let her mind wonder too far, so far that she never wanted to go back.
Now she was certain, she had to tell him.