Lovino sat on the sofa, his legs stretched across the other cushions. Feliciano was currently sitting on his lap, playing with his fingers happily. The two were currently having a lazy Saturday morning, because they had the day off. Feliciano was still a little hesitant to leave Lovino for a whole day's work, anyway. Lovino was a bit annoyed by his younger brother, trying to watch a soap opera currently playing on the television, but he kept one arm wrapped around his waist so he wouldn't fall off like an idiot. Feliciano was interrupted from his current activity by the loud ring of the phone. He looked behind him, and smiled at Lovino.

"Yeah, yeah. Go get it, idiota." Lovino muttered, unwrapping his arm from the younger man's waist.

Feliciano let out a short 'Ve!' and jumped off of the couch, running into the kitchen to grab the home phone. Lovino muttered under his breath as the attention of his brother was stripped away. It was probably that krautface again. Lately, Ludwig has been calling Feliciano and inviting him over to 'train' but, Lovino had his suspicions.

"Hi, Luddy! We need to be quiet, cause Lovi might hear me. He'd probably be mad." He heard a giggle erupt from the kitchen, followed by a quick cough to cover it up.

Now, he was a pinch more angry. It annoyed him how much Feliciano hung out with Ludwig, even if they were just friends. As of late, Lovino had felt a tiny bit too possessive over Feliciano. He didn't know what it was, if it was protective or a slightly romantic feeling. All he knew was he wanted to make sure Feliciano was safe.

"Ve, alright! I'll see you soon! Ciao!" Came another loud giggle, and a 'clank' as the wall phone was hung again.

Feliciano's feet loudly banged against the wood of the kitchen floor as he trampled into the carpeted area of the living room where Lovino had been residing.

.

"So," Lovino grumbled angrily, "Who called?"

"Oh, no one! It was just Kiku!" The young man exclaimed with cheer, searching for his cellphone in the cushions.

Lovino raised one eyebrow, curious why Feliciano had lied to him. He grunted lowly.

"Whatever, bastard."

Feliciano gave his brother a soft smile and continued scrambling to find his expensive cell phone. Soon enough, the young Italian was angered and muttered something inaudible under his breath. Then, he looked at the lights that were shining in the corner of his eye, distracting him.

"Ve! Fratello, I can't wait for Christmas! I love it when everyone's happy and none of the nations are fighting! It's the best! We can invite Roderich and Elizaveta and Antonio-

"There is no way in hell that the 'Tomato Bastard' is coming here for Natale." Lovino grumbled, reminiscing on the embarrassing things Antonio did that made Lovino want to kill him.

"Ne, Lovi! It'll be fine! You can't really think we wouldn't invite all of our friends."

"I don't know why you say our friends, idiota. I don't like them or their shit-eating faces!"

Feliciano smacked him upside the head with a slight frown, "Fratello, why do you have to be so mean? I mean, you like Matteo, right?"

"Okay, so I don't like them or their shit-eating faces except for Matthew."

Feliciano sighed and continued to let his hands wander beneath the cushions of the couch. He heard a scoff come from the older Italian, and his phone had suddenly appeared in front of his face.

"Eh? Fratello? Why didn't you tell me you had my phone?!" Feliciano whined, snatching the expensive technology from his brothers rough hands, only to notice Lovino immediately retract his arms and cross them in a tight knot, muttering.

"What? What's bugging you?"

"Oh, nothing. You go have fun with Potato Breath." The sarcasm dripped from his annoyed voice.

The younger brother raised his eyebrows and tilted his head slightly to the side.

"What do you-"

"Stop it, idiot. Why don't you just go already? You don't need to stick around to make sure I don't fucking kill myself."

"Wha-? What are you even talking about? Who even said I was going to Ludwig's?" Feliciano questioned, giving a weak glare to his brother.

Some days, Felciano could be beaten up, cussed out and tortured by his brother and would still keep a smile on his face. Today was not one of those days.

"Do you think I'm deaf? I can hear your girly giggling and flirting in the kitchen. Be quiet, my ass. Just take your fucking phone and leave, you bastard." The southerner grumbled, lifting himself up and heading into the kitchen to grab something to take his mind off of his younger brother.

Feliciano headed over to the door connecting the living room with the outside world, opening it before turning back towards the retreating figure and shouted in annoyance.

"Why do you get so angry for no reason? That's probably the reason everyone likes me better than-" The sentence came to a stop, as did the older Italians movements.

"What was that?" He spoke out into the air, chest tightening by the second.

"Ne! Nothing! Just some random rambling! You know me, babble, babble, babble!" Feliciano tried to cover the accidental words that had escaped his mouth. But once they were said, Lovino began to shake, "Lovino?"

"Just take you and your idiotic self to go screw your potato-loving boyfriend. See if I care!"

Feliciano cringed at the harshness of the comment, and felt something inside of him tick like a bomb.

"Why do you care you care so much, anyway!? If I want to go across the world to see Alfred, I should be allowed to!" Feliciano whined, angrily.

Why was Lovino so disapproving of his German friend?

"Yeah, and why should you care if I want to disappear? It only benefits you in the end, anyway! Why are you so persistent on telling me you care when you really wouldn't!? All you need is your loving friends to get you by, not some fucking disgrace of a southern counterpart for a brother!"

Feliciano felt the pit of his stomach churn. Now, he was angry. Something rare to see in the young Italian, since he was always so cheerful towards everyone. He began to wonder what went wrong with the morning, and what had caused Lovino to say such things.

"How dare you! You think I would be that shallow as to be happy that you could've bled out to death in your room?! Do you really think I lied about everything I said to you?!"

There was a moment of silence.

"I don't think you lied, I know you lied."

Feliciano was never good with controlling anger. He wouldn't hurt anyone, but it was always very visible on his face, ending in what seemed to be an endless stream of tears; tears of frustration. It also caused him to say things he regretted saying for the rest of his life.

"Y-You," He choked out, trying his best wipe away his tears with a clenched fist, "You know what? Maybe I will go screw with my 'potato-loving boyfriend' and you can go kill yourself in whatever fashion you'd like! See ifI care."

With that outburst, Feliciano slammed the door with all of his might. His tears wouldn't be stopping for a long while. His chest twisted and turned with the feeling of regret that he hated so much. He never knew what got the best of him, It was like he was changing into some kind of cruel demon. He leaned on the wooden fixture for a moment, letting out weak cries and whispering the name of his brother before pushing off of it and retreating to the only place he felt he could be comfortable.

It had been two whole days.

Lovino had counted the hours since his brother had fled the house. The pain in his chest felt like it could make his heart stop beating at any moment. He was curled up on the couch, letting the words replay in his head over and over.

'Maybe I will go screw with my 'potato-loving boyfriend' and you can go kill yourself in whatever fashion you'd like! See ifI care."

Feliciano had never sounded so cold before. He couldn't blame him though. He was being a cruel bastard, always beating up on him until he finally burst. It was cold in the house that night, without the warmth of the younger Italian swaying carelessly around the house, singing some random tune with his angelic voice.

God, what was wrong with him?

This was his brother he was talking about, not to mention his brother who just told him to kill himself. He knew the words were empty, that they weren't true. But between the crack in his normally perfect voice to the tears rolling down his so-damn-perfect face, Lovino couldn't help but second guess himself. The morning light blinded his red, wet eyes. He chuckled as he realised he was acting like a teenage schoolgirl, who just got rejected by her crush. He could finally understand that situation. He decided he would skip the world meeting today, too. Anything to avoid the younger Italian. In the end, he decided he would go to a place any good catholic would go.

If you thought that was supposed to be heaven, good guess. (Bastard.) But, he stood in front of the church that he and his brother attended every Sunday when they were free. They made it a weekly thing, even if they couldn't go on the 'sacred day.'

Lovino was completely and utterly bored during the mass, something that hadn't struck him for a long time. He would always be entertained by the well-dressed Northerner beside him when they went. But, now he was alone. He missed the way Feliciano would bounce around cheerfully during the hymns, and sit quietly playing with Lovino's fingers during the readings. It was almost exhausting to sit there alone.

After the mass, he decided to confide in another nation he knew would be skipping the meeting today. He walked along the trail of white, with large, bare trees lining it. He could imagine it being beautiful during the fall. He came upon a large log cabin-like house, with the red and white flag resting above the bright red door. He stepped up the handmade staircase, and knocked on the door, retracting his arm and looking around at the beautiful scenery.

"Eh? Oh, come on in!" He heard a soft voice speak, before twisting the doorknob and letting it swing open.

He was greeted by a sweet smell entering his nostrils, and a roaming bear, who had stopped to stare at him. A head poked out from the kitchen, and a smile grew on the face of said head.

"Oh! Lovino! What are you doing here? Isn't there a meeting today?"

"Shouldn't I be asking you that? You're an actual nation, I'm just half of one."

"Well, what's the point of going if no one notices you, eh? I was going to just make some breakfast and then head in late, anyway." The Canadian smiled, motioning to Lovino to join him in the kitchen.

Lovino hesitantly entered the kitchen, sitting down on one of the elegant chairs of the kitchen table and taking a whiff of the air. Since he had not eaten since the incident with Feliciano, he felt as though his taste buds were crying. Matthew noticed the dreamy gaze the Italian was making towards the pan, and chuckled quietly.

"You can have some, you know. I usually make too many, anyway."

"I'm guessing you put away the extras for after, then?"

"What?! Who would let warm pancakes go co- I mean, uh, yeah, you could say that." The young nation blushed at his sudden outburst, and flopped the delicacies onto two plates, and poured some hot water into two cups, creating the hot chocolate that smelled just as good as the pancakes.

He handed Lovino a cup and a plate, who stared at the maple-covered pancakes with a glint of want in his eye. Matthew just continued to chuckle and set himself a plate and cup onto the table, taking a seat across from the Italian. By now, Lovino had been devouring the foreign food like it was the only food he'd had in days (which you could say is true.). What could he say? Italians were gluttons when it came to good food.

"So, why aren't you at the meeting again?"

With one last gulp, the plate in front of Lovino was empty. His eyes landed on the blonde-haired man as he lifted his head up with urgency.

"What the fuck did I just eat?"

He didn't think about it at first, but now he was suspicious of the round fluffy food that Matthew had served him. It was a different taste to him, since most of his culinary culture revolved around pizza, pasta and things of that sort.

"You seriously don't know?! They're only the most delicious things known to the North American tastebuds! They're called pancakes, slathered in the angelic and sweet maple syrup!"

Lovino cocked an eyebrow suspiciously at the Canadian. He would never have thought that the man would get so defensive and passionate about food. Maybe they had more in common then he thought. After realizing his passionate speech, Matthew quickly blushed again and sighed.

"Sorry, eh? You still haven't told me why you skipped the meeting."

"What's it to you, bastard?" Lovino started getting defensive, wishing the younger man would stop asking, "If you really want to know, I'm just avoiding my idiot brother."

"Well, I want to know because you seem upset, even if you always seem upset," He chuckled at the Italians pout following those words, "Plus, you actually came to visit me, not just ask where my idiot brother is. You're my friend!"

Lovino looked up again into the purple eyes. There was a warm smile on the blonde's face as he chuckled. Lovino just scoffed out a 'whatever' and picked up the mug, swishing around the brown, warm liquid.

"Oh, wait!" A soft voice exclaimed, grabbing the bottle of maple syrup from the middle of the dark wooden table and squirted some into the mug.

"Ugh! Why would you put that stuff in there?!" Lovino spat, disgusted as he stared into the mug where the thick syrup had sunk into the chocolatey substance.

"Just taste it! It's good!"

It was good to say the least. Lovino had drank two more cups after that one, surprised at how much he liked the sweetness. It had been about an hour or so since he arrived, and he felt like he had been at the log mansion all his life. He was starting to think Feliciano had been right, that he would be friends with the other nations in due time.

"So, let me get this straight, Ludwig called, Feliciano lied about him calling, you got mad, then he got mad, and then he left." The Canadian went over the dramatic situation Lovino had ranted to him about for the past couple hours.

"Well, if you want to make it easier to explain, si."

"Well why is it such a problem with you if he left? I thought he annoyed you?" The questions asked seemed to make Lovino think Matthew wasn't listening at all.

"It's not just that! He's been gone for two days! I'm so used to seeing him every fuckin' moment of the day that my head hurts just thinking about it."

"I still don't see the problem. I'm sure he just had a sleepover at Germany's place and got occupied. Nothing to worry about." The young nation said matter-of-factly, taking a sip of his fifth cup of hot chocolate.

"What do you know…" Lovino muttered, crossing his arms and looking out the kitchen window at the nature-filled scenery.

"Don't be so closed-minded. I swear he's fine! When I go to the meeting, I'll text you to tell you if I see him and he's all good."

"Yeah, I bet he'll be with that potato face bastard. Dio, I hate that guy with my whole being!" He grouched, keeping his arms in a tight knot and avoiding eye contact with the other.

"You really shouldn't worry about that, either."

"You think I'm worried about that Macho Potato? I'm worried about my brother being raped by the guy! Why would you think I would not be worried?!"

"I don't think you should be worried because Feliciano may act like a seven-year-old, but he's still a grown man, a nation at that!"

"Tell me something I don't know!"

Lovino felt that tightness in his chest reappear. It was happening again. He hated that he was such a dick to everyone, but it was just in his nature. This is why he doubted anyone wanting to be his friend, he could never be kind and nice like Feliciano.

The Canadian gave a weak frown, looking a bit angered at the sarcastic comeback.

"I'm still having trouble understanding why you care if he has a relationship with Ludwig and Kiku or anyone for that matter. When I say he's a grown man, I'm saying he's able to make his own decisions. Why can't you let him do that!?"

"Because I love him, you bastard idiota!"

The outburst came before Lovino could react. It was loud, like the whole continent of North America could have heard it. He didn't think about it before either, so he was quite surprised himself. The violet eyes widened, and his lips pursed into a straight, thin line. His own eyes wide, the older nation breathed out.

"I-I" Lovino started, pretty certain about what the Canadian thought of him now, "Tell him I'm sorry. I have business to take care of."

He walked as fast as he could to the front door after lifting himself out of the chair, and scooting it back in. He heard the Canadian call to him, but he slammed the door in response. There went another friend and his secrets, disappearing with the wind.

Lovino sat in the ruins of the attic, after having another episode of anger and emotion. He sat on the sofa that had been abandoned up there a while ago, which was now ruined by the glass which had ripped into it. When he entered the house, he was hopeful that he wouldn't have to encounter his younger love interest, so he hid in the upstairs attic that was made into a makeshift living room. But he couldn't contain his anger, so another hurricane of objects flew throughout the room. He clutched his phone in his hand, not having the courage to look and see if there were any messages.

That was until he felt a vibrate, followed by the upbeat song of 'Canadian, please!' that Matthew had set into the cell. He flipped the phone over and let the screen light up.

[17 missed calls/3 new voicemails/24 messages]

His body shuddered. Feliciano had been trying to communicate with him for a while now, but he never noticed. He put in the passcode of the phone and skipped through the texts from the younger Italian and clicked on the message from the Canadian.

'Feliciano is really worried, and I am too. Please don't do anything stupid.'

Lovino read the message with a glazed eyes, trying to read between the lines. The text was a dark red, a known colour of blood.

'Just leave me alone, you bastard.'

No point in keeping in vulgarities now. He exited out, and scrolled down the long list of messages. From the first one up, they started to get a little more detailed with worry. He grunted under his breath, going to his little phone icon and seeing the small list of voicemails the northerner left him. First one.

Ciao, fratello. I just wanted to let you know I didn't mean what I said. Please be careful. Ne, Buona Notte.

That was heart-warming. Feliciano had tried to make him feel better. But, the voice was not the regular cheerful one that his brother identified with. Lovino was still second guessing the empty words. Second one.

Ve, Fratello! Why aren't you at the World Meeting? Call as soon as possible~!

Now his stomach churned a bit. He didn't know it if was from the heaping pile of fluffy dessert-like food Matthew had stuffed him with, or if it was just the unknown worry eating away at his stomach. Third one.

Fratello, if you get this, please call me back! I'm really scared! I came home to see you and you weren't there, and I couldn't wait because I had to go back to the meeting! Please, please, call me back as soon as you can. Please.

He realized it wasn't the pancakes. He could hear the concern in the voice, and he had just left the boy hanging. He could only imagine what his fratellino was feeling now. Well, he could only imagine for a few seconds until his phone rang with chanting, excited song his brother sang all the time. The screen showed the two of them together, a picture Felciano had taken not long ago. He hesitantly pressed the green symbol and saw the little numbers appear to time how long the call was. He immediately regretted it. It was silent for a good moment or two before a childlike voice spoke into the air.

Fratello? Are you there? Oh Dio, I'm glad you're alright! Where are you? Please, just head home! I'm heading there now with some of the , I was really scared that something had happened to you!

"Don't treat me like a child, idiota."

Wha-What do you mean!? I'm just telling the truth! When I get there, maybe we can get you to become friends with everyone else! W-We can-

"Does it seem like I want to be friends with anyone?"

Ve, Fratello, please…

"Just leave me alone, already!"

Ve?! Fratello- Lovino!

He hurriedly clicked the red button as the shout sounded through the cell. He could hear the front door slam open as his brother and whoever he brought with him entered the house. He could hear sobbing illuminating from the lower level.

"What did I do?! I made him mad!" A very familiar yelp cried out.

"Italia, please, don't worry too much about it! I've had times where I was also upset."

"You don't get it, Kiku! He'll get really angry and then- Oh Dio, things will happen!"

Lovino chuckled at the little faith his brother had in him. He could hear footsteps trampling across the floor, looking for him most likely.

"He- He actually came by my house before I went to the meeting… I talked to him for a while."

Lovino's eyes widened, and he dropped to his knees from the couch and pressed his ear to the ground.

"Don't you dare, Matthew." He muttered, quietly, getting that anger from before building up in his stomach.

If the Canadian said anything, his life would be over. He would personally jump out the window and break his neck. He would be too embarrassed to even function. More embarrassed than Antonio had ever made him.

"Ve!? What did he say!? Did he tell you where he was going?!"

"I told you this at the meeting, too." A sigh erupted from the soft voice, "I assumed he was going to just come back here. He said he had 'business to take care of' or something like that."

Lovino gave a quiet sigh of relief that the blonde hadn't spilled all his secrets. He swore he could've died on the spot of embarrassment. There was silence, until it was broken by a strained cry.

"I killed him! Oh God, I killed him! Lovino, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it!" The voice cried out pathetically, failing to choke back sobs.

Guilt started to splash over Lovino. He wanted to just rush down to the crying nation and hug him until his tears vanished. But another part of him told him to just hide away from the group and sort his shit out. He was just as much as a mess as the crying man.

"That is enough, Italy!" Another gruff voice shouted, "He may as well be dead if you carry on like this."

Oh, God. That voice belonged to the guy who started all of this. He was starting to feel better and more welcome until he had to ruin things. What's worse, is he made his darling younger brother cry harder than he already was. He swore if that guy's neck wasn't so thick, he would choke him to death.

"I don't think he would kill himself because of you, Feliciano." The soft voice came again, a few footsteps following it.

"Ve, Why?"

Oh god, no.

It was only a few moments ago, but he wanted to go kill Matthew. His chest and stomach twisted with anger and fear. He felt like his heart had just burst. The cruel burning in his heart made him feel empty. To think he trusted that Northern American nation for a second.

"H-He said that?" Came a choked whisper.

"Yeah, he did. I know he probably wouldn't have wanted me to tell anyone that, let alone you, but before I could ask him about it, he stormed out of the house."

"Ve, Fratello…So, that's why you didn't want me to hang out with Germany."

"I guess, but, anyway, Do you have any place where Lovino would go in the house that we probably wouldn't know about."

Lovino sat on the edge of the open window, readying himself to jump. He knew it wouldn't do much damage since he was a nation, but hopefully he could become comatose or something. He couldn't face Feliciano after that. There was a moment of silence from the countries downstairs, and a quick gasp following.

"The attic! He always used to stay in the attic when he wanted to be alone and because he doesn't like spiders and things in the basement!"

Lovino smirked slightly, Attaboy, finally storing something in that thick head of yours. There was a monstrous wave of footsteps after a screeched 'To the Attic!' was let loose by a loud obnoxious voice. He turned to look out at the scenery as he let his grip on the window pane loosen. He heard the commotion of the attic door opening, and footsteps roaring up the stairs.

"Fratello! Wait!"

He sat there, looking blankly at the swaying trees. He couldn't turn around to face his brother .

"What do you say, Veneziano? A drop from 3 stories would do the trick, si?"

"Ne! Please don't, fratello! I'm finally starting to realize why you don't like Germany! To be honest with you, I didn't like you hanging out with Antonio much either, heh! But, now I kinda get that feeling inside of me, too. For a while, actually, ve!"

Lovino felt that familiar redness come across his cheek, but scowled all the while, not looking at the figure behind him.

"Really? Well, Ludwig seems to have you wrapped around his finger most of the time, doesn't he?" He spoke more matter-of-factly than questioning.

A grunt of amusement came from the German, and Feliciano elbowed him in the side, giving a weak glare and a 'Shush!'.

"Heh heh, I guess I was a bit of a dick about that, ne?" Feliciano giggled pathetically, breaking his glare from the German, "I've been hanging out with Luddy a lot for a few reasons. He makes Kiku and I train lots, and I go to him for emotional support when I get upset! But recently, I've been going to talk to him about how I should confess to you! I've talked to everyone here, really!"

How could he be so careless?! People weren't so accepting of incesteous relationships. Unlike him, his idiot of a brother decided to tell everyone and their mother about his feelings towards him. He began to turn around to yell at him.

"What!? You stupid idiota! You do real- WAH!"

"Lovino!"

His grip had been too loose to keep him on the window sill, and he felt himself fall at a blistering pace. His back connected to the dusty ground with a slam, and he got the breath knocked out of him. As he regained his breath, he coughed as the dust covered his view of his brother screeching from the window. Pain shot through his body as he gave a loud groan.

"Lovino! Are you okay?! Say something!"

"Fuck me and my fucking idea's…" He groaned, rolling onto his side and coughing from the slight ingestion of dust.

Soon enough, There were quick footsteps running towards him, slightly panting. A blue-covered pair of legs collapsed beside him, lifting his head and resting it on the soft material.

"Ve! Are you okay, fratello? Are you hurt?"

"Of course I'm hurt, idiota!" He yelped as the pain shot through his body once again, "O-Oy, I'm sorry. I just didn't know why you would go tell the whole fucking world, literally, about your feelings. It amazes me how much you trust people sometimes."

"Eh heh heh.. Well, sometimes it's too hard to contain, so I have to tell someone! It's always nice to have someone to talk to when you have loved someone for so long!"

"Oh, and how long was that?" Lovino rolled his eyes, lifting his head from the clothed lap and pulling himself up into a sitting position, and faced the younger.

"Maybe I can tell you over dinner, ne?" The voice spoke so softly, that Lovino could have totally disregarded what it had said if he didn't think about it.

"C-Che!?" Lovino stuttered, suddenly feeling a soft peck on his cheek.

Feliciano giggled at the shocked red face in front of him, and lifted himself up, heading back towards the group of nations at the entrance of the house to reassure them that everything would be alright.

"Oy! Get back here, you idiot!" was all Feliciano could hear from the flustered figure on the ground, as he let a bright smile form on his face. He was so happy!

Lovino sat on the ground, dumbfounded, and tried to comprehend what just happened. Maybe he should just thank Matthew, instead. He rubbed his cheek, flustered.

Cheeky bastard.