"Brooke seemed surprised to see me," Lucas said when they reached their hotel room.

"Did she?" Lilly asked innocently.

"She didn't know I was coming, did she?"

"Well she knew that I was bringing…a friend," Lilly replied.

"Lilly! You just sprang me on her? I haven't seen her in over five years and you just casually invite me to dinner with her and don't even tell her!"

"Yeah, she did look kind of upset when she realized it was you. I don't think I've ever seen anyone turn that white. But, Luke, I did it for you. I love you. I know that you were close to her and then she up and left without an explanation. I know that hurt you. Plus who knows, you're single again and she would make an awesome sister-in-law!" Lilly giggled.

"Lilly! Don't get any ideas. You know that Brooke is a part of my past. You know that I was once in love with her. However that was a long time ago. Almost twenty years…"

"Yeah, I guess I forgot how old you are! You probably don't even notice that Brooke Davis is still hot!" Lilly laughed as he rolled his eyes.

"Lilly!"

"I know, I know. But she is, and for an old guy you aren't to bad looking yourself!"

"Would you stop now? Brooke was also one of my best friends. She understood me, even when I didn't understand myself. She knew that Peyton and I were meant to be together and encouraged me to go to Peyton, and that was after we had dated."

"Yeah, and look how well that turned out…"

"Lilly! You know Peyton and I still are friends…it is just difficult lately because of Mark. They are going to be married soon and things will get back to normal…"

"Normal? Luke, you only get to see your kids on the weekends! You have to spend part of that time just driving to get them! Peyton moved to Charlotte and she didn't even consider how that impacted you. The kids miss you like crazy! Plus you don't have any prospects in Tree Hill…"she added almost as an after thought.

"Let's go to bed! I have to get to the bookstore early and you have your interview…let's talk about this later, okay?" Lucas asked, slightly annoyed.

"Okay. Good-night Luke," she said as she went into the bathroom to prepare for bed.

"Have wet dreams…I mean sweet dreams!" she laughed as she closed the bathroom door.

…

"Lucas, I need to talk to you," Peyton said calmly. Haley and Nathan had taken the children for the night.

"Sure, what's up?" he said and sat next to her.

"I know that lately things have been kind of…off with us. We don't hardly do anything together, that doesn't involve the kids. We don't talk like we used to. We hardly ever make love any more…" she paused and looked into his eyes. She realized that he had tears already forming in his eyes.

"Peyton, I know. I know what you are going to say. I have been feeling the same way for a long time now."

"You have? Luke, are you sure you know what I am saying?"

"You are not in love with me," he said simply. Her mouth fell open, she had known that they often thought alike but she felt as if he was reading her mind.

"How?"

"I feel the same way. I love you, Peyton. I really do love you. However I realize that the love I have for you has always been the love of my soul mate, my best friend, and you have always been apart of me. However that isn't all that makes up how a person feels when they are in love."

"It has begun to feel too comfortable, too predictable, and not exciting enough. We will always love each other. But I think it is time we both admit that although we are family, we are not in love."

"Lucas, you know me so well," Peyton cried as tears started streaming down her cheeks. Lucas pulled her close and they sat holding each other and crying.

"Lucas, I do love you. I am sorry."

Lucas sat up. He was having the dream again. It was always the same. It was always exactly what had happened, and it always left him feeling empty, hollow. Like he was missing something, something in Peyton eyes as she said she was sorry. He could never figure that part out.

He glanced over at the clock. Two-thirty. He had to be up in three and a half hours but he felt wide awake. He pulled on a shirt and quietly left the hotel room.

He started walking. The night was cool. He was considering heading back to the hotel when he noticed a magazine lying on the ground. B. Davis

He leaned over and picked it up. There she was on the cover, his pretty girl. He smiled as the nickname came to mind. She was standing, smiling and holding a bouquet of flowers. He glanced at the date on the magazine, four months ago. She was beautiful.

He flipped the magazine open to the contents page. He never really read her magazine. He figured it was all fashion and glamour. Then a topic caught his eye:

Recovering from Cancer. He flipped it to the page indicated and gasped. A picture of Brooke in a hospital gown, her hair covered with a bandana and a "fake" smile filled the page. The byline read: Brooke Davis- Millionaire, Entrepreneur and Cancer Survivor

…

"Lucas, what are you doing?" Lilly asked as she awoke. It was five am. Lucas was pounding away on his keyboard.

"Reading. Well searching the internet. Thinking."

"Oh, ok. What is the matter? You look like you are in the middle of a panic attack."

"Do you read Brooke's magazine?"

"B. Davis?"

"Yes. Why?"

"Did you know Brooke had cancer?"

"Um…yeah…it was also on TV," Lilly replied

"Why didn't anyone tell me?"

"Lucas, it was all over the place. I thought you knew. Plus she was like a friend of yours so I thought maybe she had mentioned it to you or Peyton…"

"Well I didn't know."

"I'm sorry Luke. I'm going to take a shower, now that I am up," she said and climbed out of bed.

"Okay…"

Lucas sat reading an article about Brooke, chemo and recovery. His eyes filled with tears, his heart started pounding and one thing went through his mind, he had almost lost her.

For so many years Brooke was a constant in his life. His trust that she would always be there if he needed her still stood strong in the back of his mind.

He had almost lost her.

Every time he had needed someone she was there, when Keith was shot, his breakup with Peyton after high school, his engagement to Lindsey ending badly, and he knew in his heart she would have been there for his divorce as well.

But he had been afraid, he was afraid to admit to her that he and Peyton were over. He somehow thought she would have taken it worse than either Peyton or him, he wasn't sure why. Maybe it was because she was so certain Peyton and he were an "Epic" love.

As he glanced at her picture he knew the real answer: he was afraid that he would admit that he had always loved her. He was afraid that she didn't love him back, and because of that he had almost lost her.