It was nearing midnight. Spike (the one from the show this fanfiction is supposed to be about) was sitting in the dumpster of La Predateur and was texting with Charlene on his smartphone. You may be asking how these dinosaurs have smartphones, and I'll explain! Charlene is a spoiled girl, and Earl and Fran had to take extra jobs just to get her one so she'd shut up. Spike's smartphone was obviously stolen.
"Hey," texted Charlene.
Spike had a grin on his face. He began texting.
"I can't believe your father threw me out last night."
"You think that's bad? Wait until you hear this!"
"Waiting…"
"I heard my mom yelling at dad, I think he tried to kill you and got the wrong person."
"WHAT?" Spike continued typing, "okay that is it he is going down!"
"I don't think killing him is a good idea. He's trying to be a better father."
Spike decided not to respond. He went to sleep in the dumpster, getting ready to hitch a ride to the junkyard.
(The next morning [AKA Making something with Earl Sinclair])
Earl was at the kitchen stove. He picked up a big egg (which was the egg Charlene produced) and cracked it atop the pan over an open flame. He let it simmer as he went to the refrigerator.
Earl thought to himself: "It's nice to be doing the cooking for once, that's what good fathers do!"
Earl opened the fridge and took out the shivering arctic fox he captured last night. The fox was soaking wet, making her completely useless. In fact she was so useless she drank herself to sleep every night.
Earl opened the lid of a machine he set up on the counter. He then stuffed the prey into the machine and put the lid back on. Earl turned on the machine and let it do its thing while he went back to the giant omelette that was in progress.
There was a shriek inside as the machine produced whirring sounds. Soon, bite-size chunks of arctic fox meat came rolling out of a slot near the machine's bottom. They landed on a plate set by Earl, along with bits of blue fur and fabric. The carnivore's ketchup that was in all living things also oozed out.
Earl finished making the omelette and put his breakfast on a plate. He then grabbed the plate of arctic fox chops, and turned off the machine from which they came. Earl then looked at Baby, who was sitting in his high chair. Baby was looking at his father with an angry expression.
Earl grabbed the King Neptune's Poseidon Powder and opened it up. Peering inside, he noticed the stuff resembled a certian white powdery drug. Were people actually managing to sneak cocaine onto store shelves? Earl shrugged and sprinkled the powder all over the arctic fox meal he prepared for Baby. He then served the boy his meal.
"I'LL NEVER EAT ARCTIC FOX!" Baby yelled.
"You are going to eat it!" demanded Earl, "Otherwise you'll never leave your chair!"
Baby then picked up one of the meat chunks and flung it at his father. Earl growled.
"EAT YOUR BREAKFAST!"
"I'D RATHER DIE!" Baby then whimpered as a cocking sound rang through the kitchen. Earl now had his hunting rifle from the first chapter in his hands and was pointing the barrel at the baby.
"You really sure about that?" Earl asked.
Intimidated, Baby slowly grabbed another chunk of arctic fox meat. His hands shook as he put it in his mouth, and he slowly chewed and swallowed.
Suddenly, Baby's pupils grew big, and a grin manifested on the child's face. Some would even say his sclera started changing color. Baby then plowed his hands into the pile of processed meat. One by one they rapidly scooped the meat chunks into his now-gaping maw.
Lowering his rifle, Earl smiled at his success. His son was chowing down like a hungry monster on a food he always refused to eat, and that made Earl happy. Satisfied with his handiwork, the dinosaur father went back to his seat at the counter and started enjoying his own breakfast.
(meanwhile…)
Robbie was in the bed of his bedroom, wearing nothing and masticating under the covers. The guy was thinking happy thoughts. Suddenly, the glass in the window above his bed shattered as a blue blur came through. Robbie spit out the thing he was chewing on and screamed. He was lucky the covers protected his bare skin from the glass. The blue thing landed atop him on the bed and stared into his eyes… Megabyte!
"AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH!" Robbie screamed, "PLEASE DON'T RAPE ME! I'M NOT A NAUGHTY PERSON! ALL THOSE DRAWINGS ON THE INTERNET WERE MADE BY TROLLS! I'M NOT FRED! I'M NOT VERY NAUGHTY! DON'T RAPE ME!"
Megabyte's eyes narrowed. "The only naughty thing I've seen you do is have your bed in front of a window," he said. Megabyte got off the bed and walked to the computer. From hammerspace, he pulled out two tables and set them down.
"Maybe instead of having a panic attack you should try getting a girlfriend," Megabyte continued as he pulled out a large battery pack.
"I...already...have…a..." Robbie said through his whimpering.
"pardon me, this may make a bit of noise." Megabyte did something. Then, there was a white flash and a loud bang. Robbie put his pillow over his ear holes too late. When the flash faded, Megabyte and the tables were gone! Robbie's computer screen flickered, but it soon went back to normal.
And then Fran came into the room because Robbie didn't lock the door.
"What was that?" The concerned mother asked. Robbie hid under the sheets because... well, let's just say Dinosaurs incest fanfics are REALLY popular. Thankfully Fran's attention was with the shattered window.
"Someone...came in here…" Robbie let out, "He's gone now."
"He probably used the window so he wouldn't interrupt Earl's breakfast…" Fran commented. She then exited the room, closing the door on her way out. Robbie breathed a sigh of relief.
(meanwhile)
Earl finished his omelette and looked at Baby. The boy was asleep on his high chair after savagely eating his arctic fox meal and he was covered in food. Earl then heard his wife coming down the steps and smiled.
"Good morning, honey!" Earl said.
"Morning, dear!" Fran replied.
Earl then looked at Fran, "I have to attend a WeSaySo meeting at Vaalbara Point," he said, "I'm going to take off now… to get there."
"But, Earl? What if something happens to you?" asked Fran.
"I'll take my rifle to protect me," said Earl, "If you don't hear from me by tomorrow evening, send Robbie!"
Suddenly, a blue head popped out of the window! IT WAS MEGABY- Just kidding, it was...
"Monica?!" Fran said in surprise. She was already surprised that her husband was planning on taking a gun to a business meeting, and Monica Devertebrae popping in didn't help matters.
(AN: In this story not only does Monica wear a full set of clothes (which are homemade due to her size) and have mammaries because of earlier ANs, she's bipedal as well. Also about her size: standing fully upright I'd say she's just shy of two (human house sized) stories tall, so she still needs to use the window to interact with the Sinclairs in their own house. Also she's a total SJW in here and this AN is getting WAY too long!)
"Don't worry about him, dear Frances." Monica said to Fran in a pitying tone, "Being the aggressive cool-colored male he is, it's obvious he will safely return."
"Enough," remarked Earl as he shooed Monica away. Turning back to Fran, he continued, "My train leaves at ten. I wonder what you'll make for dinner."
"Dinner?" Fran said.
"For tomorrow night; I plan to be back sometime the next day." Earl said.
"Oh, I haven't thought of that yet."
"Alright then," Earl blew Fran a kiss and waved, "I'll see you later!"
Then Earl exited through the front door of the volcano house, leaving Fran to get Baby cleaned once he wakes up.
(to be continued)