Life with Naruto
Disclaimer: Nah, I don't own Naruto. You want proof? Well! I wouldn't be sitting around writing second rate fanfiction if I owned the damn series, now would I?
Chapter Three: Birthday Surprises
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Sasuke breathed in deeply. It was good to be back in Konohagakure after such a long, hard mission in the Hidden Mist. It had been surveillance and espionage, and he'd gone alone instead of as part of Team Kakashi. He'd been gone a month, long enough to start missing even his usura-tonkachi of a blond baka best friend.
The Uchiha opened his apartment door soundlessly, not wanting to wake Naruto. Sasuke wanted sleep…he would deal with the insanity of his hyperactive roommate in the morning.
He was about to creep to his room when a smell and a sound caught his attention. The smell was food, his stomach rumbled loudly, and the sound was the soft snores of Naruto, and the louder, more guttural snore of Kakashi.
He turned to the living room. Sure enough, five lumps of living, breathing (snoring, in two cases) someones were arranged haphazardly around a large, desiccated cake. Sasuke frowned as he read the fractured icing.
"A-PY B-RT-Y –UKE," it read.
Oh.
Was it that time of the year already? Sasuke checked his mental calendar. Yup, it was his birthday alright, and apparently his team had celebrated it with a bang. He smiled. There'd been more guests, judging by the number of dishes in the sink, either that or Naruto hadn't touched the dishwasher since he'd left.
Which, come to think of it, was also pretty likely…
Sasuke's smile grew as he noticed the other, telltale signs of a party: popped balloons, crumbs everywhere, empty beer cans, a white purse in the corner of the room, forgotten…
…and a large pile of wrapped presents on the island in the kitchen.
Sasuke grinned. Sleep later, presents first.
But even before that…it was a cold night, and his team had fallen asleep talking, it seemed, as they were all without blankets. Sasuke rummaged through the dryer (at least Naruto had done the laundry, that was something) and set about covering them up.
A black comforter for Sai, green duvet for Kakashi, pink blanket for Sakura, white linen sheet for Yamato-san…
…and of course, a bright orange coverlet for Naruto.
"Teme…?" his friend stirred as Sasuke tucked him in affectionately.
"Go back to sleep, dobe."
"Happy birthday," he murmured, curling up, "Presents on the island."
Sasuke smiled at him. "Okay, usura-tonkachi."
Naruto's eyes shot open. "Sasuke's back!" he blurted out, and his friend winced as he was glomped, right onto Kakashi's sleeping form.
"Waugh!" the copy-nin bellowed in alarm.
"Sasuke-kun?" Sakura mumbled, sitting up.
"What's going on?" Yamato asked sleepily.
"Sasuke-kun has returned," Sai explained, perfectly unruffled as ever.
"Hello," Sasuke said, "Wanna open some presents?"
"It's 3 AM, can't you wait?" Kakashi grumbled.
"Sempai, be a good sport!" Yamato laughed, getting up, "Sasuke-kun, come on, let's open your gifts."
"Any food leftover?" the raven haired boy asked, "I'm starving."
Sakura immediately walked to the refrigerator, and began pulling out various dishes.
"Take your pick," she chuckled.
Sasuke chose a few cold cucumber sandwiches and a leg of duck. Sai snapped some chocolate pudding, and Naruto grabbed the last slice of cheesecake as Kakashi reached for it. Scowling, the older man opted for a beer, throwing one to his substitute captain. Yamato caught it through pure reflex, it was at such a wild arc.
"Mine first! No, last! First! Last!"
"Naruto's last," Sakura decided for him.
"Okay. Let's see," Sasuke said, reaching for the first gift, "This is from…Sai!"
He opened it. "Wow!"
It was a gorgeous painting of team seven.
"Nice!" Yamato complimented. The artist shrugged. "Its my forte, so yes, it would be nice."
Sakura scowled. "When someone compliments you, you smile and say thank you!"
"Yes, Sakura-chan," he said meekly.
"This is Shino's," Kakashi said, handing the birthday boy another packet.
"Ewwww," Naruto wrinkled his nose, "Dead bugs…"
"Crystallized spiders," Yamato corrected, "These priceless, they'll never decay. It's a treasure of the Aburame clan."
"Whatever, its still gross," Sakura muttered.
"Hinata's," Naruto offered.
"A moonstone pendant on a silver chain—a good luck charm." Kakashi noted.
"Kiba-kun's present," Sai said.
It was a four foot tall Akamaru plushie.
"How old does he think I am? Ten?" Sasuke complained.
"I'll take it!" Sakura squealed.
"This is from Gai-sempai," Yamato frowned, poking the bright green wrapping, "It feels like clothes."
"Hey,
he gave me one of those when I was like, twelve!" Naruto said
excitedly as the green skin suit came into view, "You should wear
it, it gives thick-brows his powers, dattebayo!"
Sasuke and
Kakashi exchanged a Look. "I think I'll save it for a special
occasion," Sasuke said slowly.
"Tenten's gift," Sakura said.
"A gift card to the ramen stand?" Yamato wondered.
"She must have you confused with Naruto-kun," Sai smiled.
Sasuke
threw it to the blond, who fell out of his chair to catch it.
"YESSS!"
"Neji got me a book," the Uchiha grinned, "A
Preordained Philosophy on Your Destined Life."
"Just what you need," Kakashi said sarcastically.
"Kurenai…"
"A new kunai set, shiny."
"Iruka-sensei!"
"Word of the day calendar, cute."
"Anko-san," Sai pointed out a slim, purple package.
"A gift-card to PandG's?" Sasuke wondered. Kakashi choked on his beer. "Porn and Goodies! Gimme!"
"Kakashi-sempai…you're a pervert."
"You got him Icha, Icha Violence, the video game?" Sakura criticized, "That's stupid."
"Hey! Don't make me raikiri you!"
"Ino-pig got you…"
"A wristwatch, boring, dattebayo."
"Chouji and Shikamaru got you a gift together? What are they, a couple?"
"They're poor."
"A gold rimmed shogi board, Sasuke, they got you a gold rimmed shogi board. Poor is something they're not."
"Bet you Shikamaru forgot to buy a gift."
"Hn. Naruto, this is one thing you'll never beat me in," Sasuke snickered.
"Gaara-kun got you an hourglass with silver sand."
"You
opened it?!"
"It was wrapped," Sai apologized.
"Temari's gift…"
"A Naruto doll in a kimono," Sakura giggled.
"Maybe I'll just give it to Hinata…"
"Huh?" Naruto frowned clueless, "Why would she want a doll of me?"
Yamato chuckled. "You're so stupid sometimes its funny, Naruto-kun."
"Whoa!"
"Kankurou got you a working model of Konoha!"
Kakashi whistled. "That boy could make a few of these and retire, I tell you."
"Sakura-chan's gift."
Sasuke blinked. It was bight pink winter set. He looked at his friend despairingly. "You made this?"
"Yup."
"Damn, that means I can't throw it away…"
"This is mine," Yamato said, a little shy.
"A book on ANBU history!"
"I heard you wanted to join…"
"Its great, I love it!"
"I think that's everyone…"
"AHEM."
"OK Naruto-baka, your turn."
Naruto beamed, and grabbed Sasuke's hand. "Its in your room!"
…
Sasuke gaped.
And gaped.
And gaped some more for the heck of it.
And gaped simply because he didn't know what to say.
What did one say to a life size 3-D collage made of Styrofoam?
"This is that time we kissed!" Naruto pointed out, "And this is when we climbed those trees in the Wave Country! This is when you were wearing that badass rope of Orochimaru's and I though you were his sex toy!"
Sasuke gaped at the ugliness of it all, and looked at Naruto, standing so proud. He thought of how much time he'd have spent on this, how hurt he'd be if he thought Sasuke didn't like it.
"I…its awesome," he lied convincingly, "I love it, thanks man."
Naruto beamed, and tackled him.
Sasuke sighed. The things he put up with for his roommate's happiness…
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don't own porn and goodies, nyah.