"Hey James."

"Hey Lola. Why you calling me so late?" he looked like he'd just woken up, and she felt a little guilty.

"It's... sort of important."

"Well, out with it." he was wearing that big grin on his face. The cute one. That's what Jane thought, anyway. Damn, she couldn't let herself get distracted now, she needed to tell him what was going on. She'd already spent two hours debating on whether or not she should call him. Her instincts and her ever-so-subtle doctor had told her that she should, for everyone's sake.

Two deep breaths, then a nod. She stared at the orange screen, to the video of the man she was talking to, who seemed anxious to hear what she had to say, his smile fading a little as he waited on her. She'd never been nervous before, and she could see he was starting to worry that she was taking so long to speak. Her voice didn't feel like it was going to come out as smooth as she wanted, but she spoke anyway.

"I think... I think I'm pregnant." she spat out softly, not believing her own words. James smiled, confused.

"That's great. But why are you telling me?"

Apparently he'd forgotten. She resisted rolling her eyes, shutting them tightly with a heavy sigh instead.

"You were the last guy I was with... Remember that party?" she cleared her throat, hoping she wouldn't have to say any more as she opened her eyes to look at him, feeling ashamed to admit that.

Jane was embarrassed, to say the least, and she let him know that as she brought her hand up to rub at the back of her neck, looking away from the screen. They didn't even have a solid relationship, and she, as well as Chakwas, were confident that she was indeed pregnant. To her relief, it explained her seemingly out-of-the-blue "stomach flu" that she'd had for the past two weeks. Unfortunately, she was on the Citadel, and he was on Earth for his N7 training. A full weeks journey apart, and she had to wake him up to tell him this before she lost her nerve and cut him out of her life completely. She'd already been on the cusp of cutting off contact with him, seeing as she never bothered to check up on him.

"I know this is a lot to take in, but... I thought you should at least know about this. We don't exactly talk a lot these days, and I've really missed that." Jane paused again to look at him. She waited a few minutes as she watched several expressions float across his face as he sat there, mouth open and clearly trying to process what he'd heard. "James, just please say something, you're freaking me out a little." She could tell by looking at him now that he was thinking of what to say next very carefully.

"Maybe we should talk about this in person." he cleared his throat and ran a hand down his face, as if he needed to wake himself up. She thought that maybe if he had woken up, this might seem like a twisted nightmare. "I get a few days off in a couple weeks... You could stay in my place while you're here if you wanted. And it'd be nice to get to see you in person, again." that was the best he could come up with. It wasn't a bad idea. They could spend some time together, and actually talk about things privately.

"That's a good idea…" She nodded with a sigh, giving him a small smile with the relief that brought. Jane took the chance to change the subject. "While I have you here, how has training been going?"

"Pretty good. I think I liked your excitement better than these guys. Not as much gunfire." James was able to relax a little again, but Jane could see that the information was bearing heavily on him. At least they could talk for a bit before he likely had to leave.

"Yeah. You'll probably cruise through training, compared to what I've put you through." She chuckled, letting silence fill the air for a few minutes. He nodded, and she could see that she wasn't going to get much else out of him tonight. "Anyway... I'll see what I can do about visiting. You take care."

"Yeah, you too. I'll send you the dates I have off in a few minutes." he went back to the reserved tone. She remembered him using it when he got shy, or if he was about to say something he wasn't supposed to. She clicked the end call button and sighed heavily.

Jane sat back, looking down at her stomach, feeling it twist with anxiety. She opened up the extranet and began looking for shuttles to Earth, waiting for James' message to come through. Once it did, she was glad to see that it wasn't for another week or so. It would take a week to get there to begin with, so she could leave next week, and hopefully get there in time. She looked at the message again, and noticed that there had been another one while she wasn't looking. Apparently he was already being promoted to N1, and the reason he had the week off was for the ceremony at the end of it.

Jane felt proud of him. She knew he'd worked hard, despite already having quite a bump in his file from working with her. But she knew that he wasn't about to let that go to his head, and slack off. Though, at the same time she wondered what it would be like, going back to one of the first places she'd called home for a while. It was difficult, and she shook her head, closing the computer and pushing away from it. Though when she looked around, it was hard to figure out what she wanted to do next. She could go to bed, it was late enough.

She hated being alone in her apartment, because it left her with too much time to think on little things. She hated being alone, period. And forcing something on James if he wasn't interested or ready... she couldn't do that to him. He deserved more than this, and honestly she felt bad about how this whole scenario had come to be. Counting back in her head, it was probably about two and a half months since that night, from what she could recall. She didn't remember much of what had actually happened at that party besides a lot of drinking, loud music, and trying to get James to relax enough around her. She felt bad for how she'd come off that night, but they talked about it the next day, and cleared things up. Neither of them wanted it to be a one night stand. So instead, they'd made it two. Since then, there hadn't been much communication between them, and it was starting to eat away at Jane, even before this whole baby thing.

So many times, she'd thought about sending James a message, asking how he was, how things were going, was he still as interested in her as he had been? But none of it seemed appropriate at the time. Jane knew she was horrible with communication, so she didn't make a habit of keeping it up with her friends. Though they all realized this quickly, and instead made the effort to branch out to her. She appreciated it. Unfortunately, with people like James who were busy, that meant it took that much more effort to keep in touch.

With another heavy sigh, Jane stood up from her desk in the living room, and went to check that her front door was locked before she went to the bedroom and got herself ready for bed. For several long minutes, Jane stood naked in front of her mirror. She recognized the terrified look on her face, and then she quickly turned to put her clothes on before she could focus too much on what she was imagining. Namely, that James would want to come back with her and take care of her and this baby. She couldn't let herself get her hopes up, they hadn't even discussed the possibility of dating, or seeing what it would be like to be together, in any form.

Her head was beginning to feel like it was spinning, so she turned off the lights and focused on relaxing so she could get herself to sleep.

Though the next morning she was visited by her mother rather early in the morning, after making a very incomprehensible call the previous morning after seeing Chakwas. She'd barely just gotten out of bed, and was about to start breakfast. Her mother had a key to her apartment so it wasn't odd for her to suddenly burst in at times like these.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong? I couldn't understand anything in your call yesterday." Hannah came in, her arm in a cast, and she sat down quickly with her daughter in the living room.

"I'm fine now." she shook her head. "Or I will be."

"Tell me what happened." her mother used her good hand to tuck back a few strands of Jane's hair. Jane sighed and turned her gaze away from her mother. She'd been raised better than this, she knew that, her mother knew that, and yet here she was struggling to be an adult and step up to deal with the consequences. "Jane, please, I'm worried about you." Jane closed her eyes and let out a heavy breath, not sure how else to phrase it. No matter how old she was, she would always feel like she had to live up to some standards set by her mother. This was not one of them, but she had to face this head on, or it could get out of control.

"I was scared when I called you because I didn't know what to do. But I figured it out... Sort of." she was building up to it slowly, trying to convince herself that she would be okay. But her tears were building up as well, and soon she was crying on her mother's shoulder. "I know you raised me better than this, mom. But I was being a little stupid a while ago." Her mother didn't do anything but rub her hand over her daughter's back. It's not that Jane didn't have feelings for James, it was just that, in the grand scheme of things, there were a lot of things that they could have done differently to avoid this whole fiasco. Not to mention this was hardly the type of thing she did, ever. After a few pained sobs, Jane finally sat up, looking her mother in the eye, already knowing what would be coming - a fight.

"I think I'm pregnant. Like a couple months pregnant." She let go of her mother, already seeing the fire in her aging eyes. She'd said it and there was no going back.

Hannah stood up after a minute and looked out the window, utterly silent. Her face fell visibly, her shoulders as well. While she knew that her mother was more than eager for her to settle down and have kids, Jane knew that this wasn't the way she'd imagined it happening. Neither of them had. But, they knew all too well, things never went according to plan. She was supposed to find a nice guy, get married, move some place nice, and then have kids. While it was ideal, somehow… Somehow this felt more how it should be. It felt right, in a strange sense. But that was clearly not how Hannah felt, and reality crashed back down around her.

All Jane could think of was how stupid she'd been for indulging in something so meaningless, not to mention taking advantage of someone in an intoxicated state more or less. Then again, she thought she was going to die in the next few weeks - that was probably why there hadn't been a lot of thought going into the matter. Regardless, she knew that what she'd done was irresponsible, and she'd already been given something of a small lecture from Chakwas about this. At least the doctor seemed happy that Jane responded with the tiniest smile from the relief of knowing at last what had been causing her stomach to be so upset.

Her mother came back over, grabbing her by the jaw so she was forced to look her in the eye. Jane was honestly terrified for what would come next.

"I'm disappointed in you, Jane. I really thought that I'd raised you better than to just fool around with anyone." her voice was low, and quiet. Her hand flew away but Jane kept staring as she continued, just a scared little girl at the mercy of her mother, "I hope you can figure out who the father is, because I'm not going to help you raise this child, and I'll be damned if you think this is something else you can do on your own."

"Mom-"

"You will wait until I'm finished, Jane!" Hannah hissed, then taking in a deep breath before she leaned down to hug her tightly. Her tone dropped back to her sweet, caring motherly tone. "I'm upset, but I'm glad you told me." Now Jane was confused. "That takes a lot of courage. And I know that you're an adult that's fully capable of dealing with this situation on your own. Now... What were you wanting to say?"

"I was going say that I'm going to go visit him, so I do know who the father is. He's in N7 training right now-"

"Jane! He's in the N7 program?!" Hannah shot up again, shocked and horrified.

"He just started training! I mean, yeah, he was serving under me for a while-"

"Oh my god, did I teach you nothing?!" Hannah began yelling, steadying herself against the back of the couch as she looked like she was struggling to avoid hitting her daughter from how white her knuckles were. "I thought you knew not to fraternize!"

"We weren't fraternizing mom, we were on shore leave!" Jane stood up, ready to kick her mother out for all the trouble she was causing. Instead she took her turn to lower her tone as she tried to remain civilized, "Look, he was the one that suggested I go visit him. I called him last night to talk to him about this, and I think we'll both feel more comfortable talking in person. He has a few days off in a few weeks, so I'm going to see him so that we can figure out what we're going to do. I'm trying to get this sorted out, mom, you just have to let me do that. I'm taking care of things."

"At least you have something of a plan..." Jane could tell her mother was about to say something, but seemed afraid.

"What is it?" she asked finally, narrowing her eyes.

"What are you going to do if he doesn't want anything to do with this?" The look Jane received was nothing short of an accusation towards James. She could tell her mother thought he was just a stupid marine who'd been living out a fantasy of being able to sleep with her larger-than-life daughter. Jane knew that to be slightly true, but he was in no way stupid, especially since he'd worked so close with her. James had admitted that he wasn't the kind of guy that took things like sleeping with someone else lightly, especially when it was someone he had come to care for. Though she wasn't sure how much, after talking with him last night, she did hope that it was the same way she did.

"Trust me, he's not going to walk away from me. If he gets himself into a situation, he knows he has to get himself out of it." She knew him better than her mother thought. "I'm not going to let him just back out of this without a good reason." Such as, he wasn't ready for this. She might even accept him not wanting a child with her, given the circumstances, but that didn't mean she wasn't ready.

While she was on the Normandy, James had been there for nearly everything, though. He'd watched over her while she'd been confined to the headquarters, he'd been there for every mission to back her up and keep her safe, and Jane had let him in to her personal life more than once to save her own sanity. She'd invited him up to talk with her before they'd hit Earth, and he briefly mentioned that party she'd thrown, saying that he didn't often get that personal with anyone he worked with, but that he wouldn't mind it if he got personal with her again. That small memory made her smile a bit. That was the little bit of hope she'd been clinging on to for so long now. Jane looked up and saw her mother had opened her omni-tool to check the time.

Hannah sat back down next to Jane and put her arm around her daughter.

"I'm sorry sweetheart, but I need to go. I have a meeting to get to."

"It's fine mom. Thanks for coming by." Jane hugged her mom, "I'll let you know what happens when I get back home, okay?"

"Alright. Just try not to let this slip out until you know how to handle it."

"Mom, I know how to handle the media." Jane smiled, letting her mom show herself out. No matter how awful their conversations went, they always ended on a good note, even if the matter wasn't resolved. It was a habit from her childhood, when they would go months without seeing each other.

The rest of her day was spent booking a shuttle, figuring out how long she'd be there, and wondering if there was anyone else she could trust to give her advice. She had a feeling she needed to keep it to just herself, James, and her mother. There was nothing stopping James from telling everyone he knew, though Jane doubted he'd do that to her, knowing she'd be showing up soon. And it helped that James knew how she reacted to secrets being shared without her consent. And her mother was well aware of how much she was being watched, and how it reflected back on Jane. She stood up to change out of her clothes, deciding that she'd go out for breakfast, now that she felt the urge to walk around.

A few hours after her breakfast, she was still out for a short walk in the park near her apartment. It was fine for some time. But after she began looking around, she couldn't shake the feeling like she was getting stared at by everyone. And not just because of her past, but because she seemed to be so unhappy. That turned her back inside quickly, to which she began going through the stack of unopened movies she'd purchased over the years, desperate for something solitary to do. For Jane, the next four days were spent locked inside, watching movie after movie, enjoying the quiet, and ability to wear and do what she wanted when she wanted to. Some grew concerned for her, and tried contacting her, but she mostly ignored the messages. Until Jeff started calling her non-stop, interrupting her movie marathon.

"What?" she said rather harshly, tired and curled up on her side on the couch. She had a fuzzy blanket wrapped around her, it was all dark in the room except for the vid screen and the omni-tool, and she hadn't showered for three days now.

"Jesus, is that how you greet everyone now?" the man tried joking, taking a closer look at the screen. "Are you okay?"

"I don't feel like talking right now..." she muttered, eyes drifting back to the movie, tempted to end the call. She knew he'd just call her back until she picked up again.

"Why not? Everyone's getting worried about you, you know... You missed Karin's birthday party. It wasn't really the same without you there." his voice was soft, very concerned for her well-being if she missed the party of one of her closest friends.

"I... I just couldn't go." she hated to admit it, but she'd never even gotten an invite for it. She'd requested, from the last time she'd seen the doctor just last week, that she be kept away from most everyone else until she'd gotten her situation sorted out. Still, she felt bad missing out on a chance to see her friends.

"Is it because of James?" Jeff asked, a smile on his face. But he was asking in all seriousness. Jane panicked slightly.

"What?" there was no denying something about him put her on edge. Jeff sighed.

"Nevermind. You need to get out, Jane. So I'm going to take you out tonight to get this... whatever is going on, sorted out. Okay? I'll be there around 5." and without allowed her to protest, Jeff ended the call. Jane buried her face in the couch and began whining like a child. She didn't want to go out at all. It might have just been her paranoia, but lately when she looked at her reflection, her eyes were immediately drawn to her now pudgy belly. She hadn't exactly been working out like before, but it wasn't like she didn't know how to eat properly and keep her figure while sitting around all day, either. She just stopped caring, and because of it she was stared at when she went out, now. And because she got stared at, she stayed inside where no one could remind her to keep being healthy. It was a cycle that she was stuck in until now.

After the movie ended, Jane decide she'd take a shower, finally. It was nearing 3 in the afternoon. She'd forgotten already what it felt like to be clean, and now she was determined once more to take a shower every day. But then she faced another problem: choosing something to wear out of her apartment. She couldn't just throw on another pair of sweats, and an old t-shirt. Grumbling, she began digging through drawers, finding a pair of loose-fitting jeans, and a t-shirt that was a little tighter on her body than she'd have liked. She looked around for a sweater to cover up some of her body, glad that she found one that matched her shirt. She felt a little better and then turned to go back and comb through her hair and maybe put on a little makeup to make herself feel better. After that, she found she still had time to watch another movie. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

Though, when she stepped out of the bedroom, she was hit with a smell that was not at all appealing. She dared to find the source, only to find out it was her couch, and blankets. Rolling her eyes she went to search for some air freshener, making sure it wasn't too strong before she used it, and then she threw the blankets into another room to be washed some other time. Jane also went so far as to open the shades on the window to let some light in. At least the floor was still clean. Then, she finally sat down, upright on the couch, and started another movie, losing herself in it.

When she heard the knock at the door she turned it off, dreading leaving the space she knew so well. She grabbed her key for the door, shoved it in her pocket, and shuffled over to the door, doing her best to smile at Jeff, who looked much more awake than she felt.

"Man... You looked a lot worse when I called you."

"I hadn't showered for a few days. Figured I could at least do that, for you." Jane stepped out, used to seeing the man on crutches by now. He laughed at her comment, but she couldn't find it in her to do the same. They didn't talk until he insisted that he drive them. She put up an argument that would have won, had he not pulled the "I was the pilot of the Normandy" card on her. She held up her hands and got in the passenger side, quiet. She was wishing she could go back home, now. Turns out, he was taking her to one of the lakes that tended to be less populated, especially with it being so late. Needless to say, Jane was fairly reluctant on getting out of the car. Jeff finally snapped at her.

"What the hell is going on with you, Jane? You were going out and doing a lot of things up until the last couple weeks. You missed your friend's party – you never miss a party." he paused and faced her again. "Is this because James left right after the war? I mean, I know you two were close, but-"

"You don't need to know what's going on. Yeah, a little of it is because James isn't here, but I'm going to see him in a few days. As for the party, I asked her if it was okay not to go..."

"How did you ask-... Why were you seeing her?"

"None of your business." she hissed, getting out of the car. She had half a thought to just get a cab and go back home, but Jeff got out, moving quickly over to her, his voice quiet.

"It is my business because you're my friend. I've lost a lot of friends already, you're not going to be added to that list. Please, I just want to help you out, Jane."

She chewed on her lip. She didn't want to tell anyone, not until she had talked to James about it. Jeff tended to gossip, too. She hated holding that against him, but in the past it had proven to be a bad idea to tell him certain things. This was definitely a sensitive issue for many different reasons. One, she was, as far as she knew, single. Two, the father was in N7 training. Three, figuring how long she'd been pregnant, there wasn't much room for error as to when it had happened. Four, she still had significance to the galaxy. It would be hell for her if anything got out.

"I'm sorry, Jeff. This is just... Something I need to keep to myself until I can figure it out. When I do, we'll talk about it more, okay?"

"I'm holding you to that, Jane." Jeff was quiet, but motioned for her to follow him. "Can you at least tell me why you haven't been getting out, or is that off the table?"

"I just feel like people are staring at me for the wrong reasons." she said. She could talk about that, without any worry. "You know, like it's wrong that I go out alone, because I'm not really with anyone."

"That's what you feel like is going on?"

"Yeah..."

"That's weird. By now, I'd think you wouldn't care what everyone else thinks about you." he was trying to cheer her up, she knew, but for some reason, his charm just wasn't working on her today.

"I do, though. Because now I might as well be one of them." she sighed. "I don't know, maybe I'm just getting tired of being recognized."

"Or, maybe you're just missing James' company?" Jeff nudged her. "He'd never stand to see you like this. You'd better perk up a little before you go and see him, otherwise he'll threaten to kick your ass."

"He couldn't if he tried." Jane smiled a little. Jeff found the key to making her smile, and kept the subject on James. So long as she was smiling again, he could feel better about taking her around. They took their time going around the lake, both sitting in the car a little exhausted about an hour later, trying to figure out something to eat that sounded good to both of them. They argued back and forth over who had more rights to make the final decision for a good ten minutes, before Jane won, making Jeff drive them to go get some asari cuisine. It was the only thing that sounded good at the moment.

"This is the weirdest thing I've eaten in a long time." Jeff said, seeming to be enjoying what he was eating, though.

"It's good, isn't it?" she smirked, picking up the bright green slimy thing, knowing it tasted good and wishing she didn't ever find out anything else about it. To her, it looked like a slug. It probably was one, but the way it was cooked made it taste heavenly.

"Maybe." the man replied, smiling. She could tell he wasn't about to give her the satisfaction of being right. When Jane had finished eating, she sat back in her seat, looking around. No one seemed to be paying her any attention. She felt some relief in knowing that she wasn't being looked at by everyone all at once. She sat and talked for a little while longer, mentioning when she was going to see James, and that she'd also seen her mother a few days ago. They chatted about the usual boring things for a while longer before they decided they were bored.

"Hey, thanks for taking me out. It was a nice change to my routine." she smiled, standing up after a while.

"No problem. You let me know if you want to go out at any time, alright? And tell James I said hi, when you see him."

"Yeah, I will." she smiled and walked out on her own, getting a cab to take her back home. The ride back was much better than she'd anticipated it to be, simply because she'd had a good time. The socialization made her realize how much she'd missed talking to people, though she was still thankful that everyone besides Jeff respected her desire to be alone.

Author's Note: I just want to give a huge shout out to WillowOdair, Lola Auditore, VeelsMe, Impslace, FunkyMonkey19, Vorcha Girl, and Jules Hawk for following this story, and another shout out to Lola Auditore and Vorcha Girl for following! It means a lot for you all to be supporting this story at the very beginning. I hope that I'll get to add to these lists in the next chapter!