Author's Notes: School has started about three weeks ago, so I'm doing my best to put up at least one chapter a week. It tends to be hard considering the lengths of these. I kept the Edward emo at a minimal. So to those who worry about him holding back sex in the future, don't worry....he won't. He won't need to. Heh heh heh.
Thanks for reading and replying. Let me know if you like or don't like. It's okay to be honest. There's alot more to tell. So enjoy this and future chapters to come.
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Chapter Three: The Invisible Barrier
Edward
If
it makes you, it takes you If it makes you, I don't want
to
I don't want to
If it makes you
scared
In the bare, anyway
See your face when you feel
Not alive
It
wasn't until I felt the the liquid on my tongue did I know what I was
doing. I pulled away, overwhelmed with the multiple body fluids on
me. His juices, mine and that familar maroon nectar. My lips were
saturated in it. His body lay sprawled on the mattress, his brown
skin shinning under the dim, hotel lamp. The bruising on his torso
was as bad as the first night I held him to me. I did that to him. A
cold sensation froze my entire being.
But I had no time to beat
myself up now.
I cupped a hand around his neck, staring at the
puncture wound there and inhaled deeply, trying my best to keep my
venom at bay. Carefully, I held him to me and pressed my lips to his
burning flesh and sucked the poison I had injected in his body not 10
seconds before.
"What
have I done?" two hours later and the hotel had become a
toturous prison. Carlisle examined Jacob, a sullen look on his face,
a look I despised myself for.
"Edward," His voice held
no accusation or hate. His eyes, though sad, held no lack of respect.
I turned away. Why wasn't he mad? "You're both strong."
"He's
not as strong as I am." my voice shook.
"And it is easy
to forget." I momentarily tuned out of the room, picking up on
the whispered voices outside. Alice and Esme spoke amongst
themselves. Both refused to come inside, fearful of what they would
see, scared of what I done.
"How long?" the words
leaked out, my mouth moving very little.
Carlisle drew in a
breath. There wasn't much he could keep from me. He noticed the
depleating responses Jacob was having. His skin burned and his
thoughts blurred and often faded out completely. "It is up to
his body. He is strong and most of the venom is gone, but we both
know what it can do to wolves..." His concerned eyes only held
mines for a few seconds. I didn't want pity or sympathy, I wanted
death.
"Edward," Alice made the brave decision of
coming inside, but her eyes were only on me as she spoke, "Something
is happening." She said lightly, "look." Through the
haze of my own mind, I travelled through hers and instantly shot out
of the hotel chair at what I saw. How could she-? We exchanged a
long, hard glance. This couldn't be possible.
"I got them
just when we arrived." She said animatedly, "I don't know
why. It's..." She stopped, reviewing all she saw. Two possible
futures, each with Jacob in it. The first was brief. The beautiful
brown puddles I became so attached to, blank and cold as my dead
body. I would soon follow. The second was more cloudy and hard to
make out, but it was there. The same eyes filled with life and
certainty as he lay in what first looked to be a hospital room, but
at better glance was Carlisle's study. He looked happy and healthy
and the way his stare was...I couldn't put a finger on it, but one
thing was for sure.
Carlisle was right. It was up to his
body.
A soft, swishing noise fluttered behind me. I didn't have
to turn to see what or who came in. Esme's mind sighed out concerned
pain as she glided past me towards the bed where Jacob's now clothed
body lay under heavy, hotel blankets. The mattress barely sunk in
under her weight as she held Jacob's warm tanned hand in hers. I felt
what could only be described as sun on a block of ice. Her affection
for him was a contagious feeling that melted my hardened agony. She
was hopeful and yet fearful like a mother would be, but her fear
wasn't for his life. It was for my pain. She was almost certain Jacob
would heal fine, but she didn't believe I did. I have been called a
pessimist before. A pale, light hand brushed a strand of hair from
his face as she smiled, almost adoringly at his resting body. He
looked so well rested-asleep. If only it was that.
"Oh,"
Alice whispered smally behind me. I almost forgot she was there.
"We're going to have a guest." I saw raven hair and amber
eyes glowing in the blackness of night. She wore an innocent smile
and curious expression. It was like an eager child willing to learn.
Judging by the way she stood in Alice's vision, there was no sense of
hostility about her. And there was only
her.
My mind focused into defense mode, "How long?" I
said these words again, this time with determined preparation.
"Less
than twelve hours." Alice spoke too quickly, "It's funny.
James has been changing his mind every 5 minutes, but I always see
her
trying to talk to you. I think she knows something or wants
to know something."
"Judging by her company, she may
just be letting us know what we're up against." I spoke these
words as I watched Jacob's frame expand and shrink. He had a chance,
I wasn't going to let anything cripple that at least.
"You
think she is teasing?" Alice's voice rose an octave.
"Only
one way to find out." Her eyes widened at my words.
"No."
was all she was able to respond with. Esme turned her head our way.
She was listening in, but thought it wise not to upset me more than
already I was. She was aware of the weight on my shoulders. A tugging
annoyance had me turning back towards Alice. My mind was made up and
she was attempting to decipher the future. I now stood before the
Raven Girl. We were...talking. We were having a conversation.
"Oh."
Alice said the second time that night, but this was of astonished
curiosity. I couldn't say I didn't share the same feelings. The woman
wanted to speak about Jacob. I was suddenly aware of how things were
stringing together. Somehow she must have knew of our relationship
and the changes
of
it. Was this her gift? And if it was, what did it benefit to her?
Could she see
things like Alice? Was she going to give me an ultimatum based on her
reveleations? Alice's eyes shot across my face. Her thoughts were
along the same lines.
"Call the rest," I finally came
to an conclusion, "We'll need them here if it is a set
up."
Alice didn't move immediately. Her hesitant actions
only expressed how against my plan she was.
"Look, Alice,"
I tried my best not to lose what little control I had. I could hear
the heartbeat flutter behind me as a reminder to what I really
needed to be thinking about, "This is the only choice we have. I
can get an advantage. She may not know what I
can do."
"Oh, I'm not so sure about that." Alice
mumbled darkly. Somehow I knew she was right.
"This is our
only choice." I repeated.
She finally nodded. Not because
she agreed, but because she saw something stir behind me. Jacob
mumbled something incoherant, thrashing his arms wildy before his
eyes suddenly shot opened.
Jacob
Heat
really didn't phase me, I guess. I am a body of throbbing, pulsing
heat. Fire's warmth doesn't bother too much, but this fire did. I had
been walking through it for God knows how long. Where the hell was
the exit? No signs, no directions? Fucking inconsiderate is what it
was. I peered past the blue flames, hoping to see something. I could
have sworn I saw his face at least a dozen times. Fear so real, I
thought it was in corporeal form. Those honey eyes stared back into
mine, his mouth moving, saying words I could not hear and then he was
gone. Vanished in the fire like he was never there to begin with.
Where did he go? I didn't see him again, but I heard voices. The Doc
came and went. Then silence. Then I finally heard him again and
through the fire I felt a cool hand around mine, leading me out,
tightening around my fingers promising to never let go. Someone was
guiding me out.
"Choice"
his voice whispered in my ear. I knew that word, I lived for that
word and was willing to die
by it at one point. That was what I was robbed of on countless times.
No chance of choice to being a werewolf, no chance of choice to
having my mind invaded by my own people, no chance of choice of
falling in love with a vampire, no chance of choice to save his life
with mines. I loved that word, I hated
that word, yet here I was handed a choice to follow that cool hand
out of the fire. Finally. I took it and through a firey barrier, I
walked.
* * * *
"Edward."
my mouth was dry to the point I thought it would crack from use.
Though a heatwave vision, I could see brown, long hair surrounding a
soft, feminine face. Not his, but this one I didn't mind at all.
"Hi
honey," Esme said softly, cupping my cheek, "Edward is
right here."
"Cheerios?" my voice cracked. Judging
by her face, I could see she thought I was dillusional. She was
obviously unaware of Edward's honey-like taste or the comparison I
held between his eyes and a box of cereal.
"It's okay,
Esme." Edward came into my vision, still as beautiful as ever. A
sad grin crossed his tasty lips as he picked up on that
thought.
"New nickname." My voice croaked out before
coughing rather violently. I suddenly was aware of how much pain my
body was in. Roaring in that fire. I never escaped it.
In a
flash he was back with a cup of water. Darn that vampire skill. He
pressed the plastic cup against my dry lips and I gulped in the
liquid with vigor. My second favorite liquid only to-
"Jacob,"
His pained voice warned. I took down all the water before trying to
say anything.
"It's the last thing I remember," I said,
"Sorry." That only made his eyes darken and his lips purse
together.
"You want any more water?" He would know if I
did, but was obviously trying to avoid the topic I was on.
"I
don't regret it, Edward," I pressed, "I wanted it." I
whispered. I didn't know if we had company, but judging by as far as
I could see, Esme and whomever was in the room, left us to some
privacy.
If he could sob in agony, it would have been at that
moment, "Why?"
I gulped, not sure what to say. I wanted him so bad. I wanted to
know what he tasted like then in some fucked up logic thought he
should know what I tasted like also. There was no room for
consequence at that moment. Maybe he was right, I had no concern for
my own life.
"It seemed like the right thing to ask of
you."
"You know how weak you make me when we..."
He couldn't finish.
"There's no restraint." I finished,
getting his point. Of course I did, it is what I loved best about sex
with him. He was truly himself. The good and the bad.
"Stop."
His voice shook. My vision blurred a bit, the fire burning to an
extreme. It was hard fighting back the urge not to grimace.
"I'm
sorry," I said pathetically, "but I can't." I hissed
out in pain.
"Jacob?" His hands fell on my forehead,
"God, you're burning up."
"More than usual?"
my joke fell flat as I stuttered through the pain streaks. He
answered with wary eyes, "Right." I nodded before my body
convulsed on its own accord. Something wasn't on the up and
up.
"Jake?" His voice was such a lullaby. So gentle and
soothing even in its pain.
Despite the vibration of my body, a
part of me yearned, needed to say something. I bit my tongue, holding
back the urge to scream as I built up the will to speak, "I love
every part of you, Edward." My leg jerked rather violently
against the bed. The pain was so much, my muscles spasmed in reply,
"Remember that."
"Jacob?!" He cried out. He
obviously thought I looked a wreck. His voice echoed, distancing
itself away as he tried again to get a reply out of me. My vision was
next to go, closing in like one of those old movies or cartoon shows.
There was no fire, no pain this time. Nothing, but that faint voice.
"Jacob!
My love....please..."
I'm sorry....but I can't.Edward
I
held his burning face towards me, my lips lightly pressed against his
as if in my wild attempts to revive him I was trying to breath
streangth into his lungs. I pressed my skin against his, the pressure
against us making a tender kiss.
"Jacob," I sobbed
tearlessly, "My love, please." His thoughts fuzzed,
blurring worse than it ever had before. Was he fading from me?
"Carlisle!" I screamed, but he was already in the
room.
My world was chaos.
I didn't want to find out if he
was breathing, if he would live, if he would forgive me.
"Oh,
Edward." That soft voice of fear as Esme realized I was losing
it. It was this she was afraid of. I backed out of the hotel room,
aware of Alice, the phone in her hand as she looked past me. It would
only be a matter of hours before we found out which path he'd take. I
needed a moment to myself, but I needed a bit of him with me. I dug
in my pockets, fingering the keys I expected to be there. His bike
was parked but a few yards away. I jumped on, kicking on the engine
before sharply driving off down an unmarked trail across the hotel
parking lot. What was on my mind was speed. Perhaps that would wipe
away the clinging sanity I had left, driving me to no longer grieve
over what I had done. Perhaps insane I could live on, but then again
I truly doubted that.
* * * *
I
ended my trip before the trees could thin anymore. Jumping off the
bike, I took the moment to let the passing time do its treatment, yet
I was still haunted by what he called "emo" thoughts. I
gripped the bike between my legs, imagining his warm body on it not a
day ago. He spent hours alone with speed and wind, I'm sure he
understood there was really nothing else to do but think. It was the
last thing I wanted to do, but the first thing I needed to get my
head on straight. The initial idea was to swallow that he wasn't dead
yet. If there was a moment to grieve
it would only be after his last breath was out of him, not as he
fought to live.
Composure was hard to come by in the past hours,
but fortunately I was gettting enough distractions. That moment was
no different. On instinct, my body froze as I felt, smelled and heard
her
by me. The moment was sudden, which barely happened if ever at all.
She approached from a narrow path a yard ahead, her eyes amber and
hair shiney and long. With graceful steps she approached, an eyebrow
arched at the bike behind me.
It is a pleasure to finally meet you, Edward.
I knew from what Alice showed that she was merely here to speak, but what was James doing?
Ah. You look a bit...tense? Not to worry, I'm here out of my own curiosity. You see, James believes me to be hunting.
"So I guess my question to you would be what are you really here for?" I'm sure she knew I was aware of her intent, but as I could already see, she figured I was only being polite. Her mind had an odd serenity to it. She thought of only the present and just this moment. She was either quite skilled at hiding the rest or was truly that interested. I froze again, feeling eyes on me. I smelled no one else but her, but I was sure there was something near by. A dear? No. I would hear the soft earth breaking in under the weight of it along with the hammering drum of its heart. I heard nothing.
You're...peculiar. Or at least your path is. I must admit when James came to us for assistance, I was quite surprised. You see, he was still alive. And his path by now should have ended. I came along out of interest, not the revenge he intended.
I
knew it was no good to attempt digging any deeper into her mind, so I
stuck with what she was giving-which was alot. There was an "us".
So there was more than one, but only she came. Interesting. And she
did have a skill, one I couldn't really pinpoint.
"You have
visions. You see the future." I stated. She turned her head in
one direction then the other. It suddenly occured to me she was in
disagreement, but the gesture seemed very much new to her as if she
seen it done before and was trying it out for the first time.
I see where the path is. Visions are controlled by decisions....choices. Paths are the direction the choices take you. Sometimes a path takes a detour, inclines into a hill, to make it easier to comprehend. All in all, the journey changes. And when it does, it creates a butterfly effect if you will. It chances other paths.
"And you're here because my path is different and it has changed yours."
Excuse me for my curiosity, but yes...and no.
She wanted to speak about Jacob, "And what does he have to do with it?"
Edward, your question is too simple. Jacob is merely a piece to the puzzle of our journey, an important one, but a piece nonetheless. You both would have been guided to each other either way, but this way was not expected.
"What would have been the other way?"
Enemies, friends, brothers.
Enemies?
Were we not enemies before? And friends...I'd say we were friends
now, but-
She didn't mention lovers, but brothers.
"We
weren't suppose to be together."
Not in that journey, no. Your life was to be with...someone else. But that is gone and this is here. What does matter is that other being you were to be with transcended into your realm in that path, bringing two worlds together. Ending a small war.
"And you think Jacob became that conduit of peace?" A much better question to ask was how would he trascend?
That won't change. I guess the problem would be how, but to my disadvantage, he is a werewolf so that I am not sure of.
"You
can't see his path." She nodded, this action came with ease,
"Only mines and whomever else this affected." This was alot
to digest, but it covered quite a bit. A hypothesis was already
growing. Before I could even try to piece the rest together, I needed
to ask one question. She saw it coming.
"Why talk to me
about it? Why let me know?"
This time she spoke, her voice
was velvety soft, "I want to know if your coven are potentials.
Or a threat. And yes, I am quite deeply interested in the
relationship a wolf and a vampire can have. It must be very
passionate and yet distructive."
I ignored her last
statement, but her smile widened at my jaws clenching. She found my
reaction humorous, "potentials for what?" Her eyebrows
arched again, but she said nothing. She turned, her body relaxed and
disappeared from where she appeared not five minutes before. A wave
of privacy replaced my anxious tension. Whoever was watching was also
gone.
* * * *
The
journey home was long. Emmett volunteered to take the bike back. I
was sure he was already an hour away even as we drove at astounding
speed. Alice's body language changed almost as much as her thoughts.
It had been 5 hours since I spoke privately to her. She hadn't said
one word since.
Until now, "I can see him!" She said
with a burst of realization, "This has to do with the
transcending." She turned to me in the passenger's seat, her
eyes ablaze. "I mean he comes and goes as if he is crossing some
invisible barrier." She bit her lip. Her mind raced through more
recent changes that may have occured.
I had one, "For a
moment, he faded out. His mind. I couldn't hear anything." I
said somberly.
She was quick with a counter thought, "He was
unconscious, Edward." she spoke tenderly, "But it does fit
into one theory; it happened after you bit him."
If I had a
beating heart, I'm sure it would have skipped a beat, dropped down
into my stomach or perhaps just stopped all together.
Edward, he could possibly turn-
"That
can't happen. Our venom kills wolves."
"Yes, but maybe
not him."
This physical law applied to all the Quileute
wolves, including him, "Jacob-" I started, ready shoot down
any ideas she would begin formulating with this theory. A pained gasp
jerked me out of my irritation.
"Edward!" Alice yelled
out, looking in the rearview mirror. I turned just in time to see
Jacob's tall frame arch almost completely off the car seats. The
increasingly familar slow pace his heart kept up in the pass few
hours was slowly dropping dramatically. It was that that caught her
attention first. I layed a firm hand to his abdoman, bringing his
body down on the leather. His skin was more firey than ever. He fell
limp, silence in the car except for the rapid pants of Alice. I
turned to her, seeing if she was okay and was surprised to see her
lips pursed a deathly worried expression on her face. It wasn't
her.
My fingers were gripping on the poles of sanity as a
wormhole, intent on sucking me away, waited patiently for me to lose
that grip.
We made it to the
house in less than an hour after. Carlisle recieved the text I sent
and was prepared with his study, a hospital bed waiting. Jacob's body
jerked wildly against my hold, mumbling incoherant words, speaking
tongues. Esme, fearfully followed behind as I raced upstairs to lay
him out.
"He's burning up." Carlisle felt his head. He
nodded, "As I expected. Follow me." I carried Jacob and
followed behind him. We entered the spacious untouched bathroom, the
curtains pulled of a wide, marble tub filled with ice. With no
hesitation, I lowered his body in the tub, noticing how the ice
instantly slide along, leaving watery trails on his exposed flesh. I
carefully slide off his clothes, to give his body a better chance
onto cooling down.
Carlisle waited patiently, checking his watch,
"Let's give his body a minute."
* * * *
It
took five. The water sloshed around him, warm and filling the tub. It
did nothing to his body temperature. A failed attempt. I drained the
water, drying him completely before wrapping him with the same
blanket he used twice and carried him back to the bed.
I could
barely hear a pulse.
"I'll get the IV and something to keep
his nutrients up." Carlisle said, already busy with a plan B. I
nodded, not letting the words sink in and watched the flawless brown
face completely peaceful. My hand intwined with one of his warm ones
and held it to my cheek suddenly at ease at his touch. Closing my
eyes, I inhaled his scent seeing my whole world in it.
"It must be passionate and yet destructive."
I
thought of the words.
And laughed.
The humor of realization
was dawning.
Being enemies mattered no more. His lack of
experience in life no longer applied. Everyone's opinions faded in
the background. None of it mattered, he was my best friend, my lover
and my brother. He was important even in another life, so there was
no way to fight what we wanted and needed.
My life was in his hands.
"Edward," the tone in Alice's
voice behind me was elated, happy, but I didn't respond. Something
suddenly caught my attention. The hum of his fragile beating heart
was gone.
Jacob was dead.
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Author's
Notes: For now, it is up to your imagination.
just keep in mind...what the hell is Alice so happy about?
Don't
worry, my pets.
Lyrics from "Must have run all day" by Glassjaw
