Hit Us With Your Best Shot

by IloveheartlandX

Twenty five years after the original glee club graduated, there has been no glee club at McKinley High since Marley, Kitty, Jake and Ryder graduated. Now, the glee clubbers children are in high school and Quinn and Rachel are determined to resurrect the glee club for their children. Will they pull it off, or will the glee club be knocked down once again? Syoc closed!

3. Auditions Part 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee; all rights go to RIB and Fox.

A/N: Thanks for the reviews on the last chapter, I'm glad you guys seemed to like it which means a lot to me, I love hearing your feedback no matter what is; constructive criticism is just as good as praise. This chapter should be slightly shorter than the last one, but no guarantees! This will be the second half of the auditions, so everyone who wasn't in the last chapter will be in this chapter.

Trigger warnings: There will be scenes of abuse, eating disorders, mentions of alcoholism, scenes of self harm & scenes of violence.

Chapter 3: Auditions Part 2

Carly's POV

I am awoken by a knock on my door. "Carly, it's Kennedy" my sister calls.

"I'll be with you in a second" I say, though it will likely be more than a second, because I have literally only just woken up.

"I'll wait for you in my room" Kennedy says, laughing slightly because she knows that I'm nowhere near ready yet. I shower first, taking time to wash my hair, and then I brush my teeth. Make-up doesn't take very long, I hardly wear any. I don't do anything with my hair, just dry it and leave it as it naturally is, loose and curly, before braiding my bangs back and pinning the braid so it will stay in place during the day. Today I choose to wear my bright blue dress with the black bow, a long light blue cardigan, and a pair of black knee high fringed boots. I also put on my small infinity necklace that I wear with most outfits. Once I'm ready I walk over to Kennedy's room. I'm much closer to Kennedy than I am to Shay, the age gap isn't much different, but we have something in common in the fact that we're both hiding what we really want to do from our parents. To be honest, personality wise, I'm the odd one out in this family, Shay and Kennedy are both chronic overachievers whereas I'm more fun loving and carefree, and pretty average when it comes to school, but somehow we all manage to get along okay.

I walk across the hall and knock on the door to Kennedy's room. "Come in" she says.

"What did you want to show me?" I ask.

"I finally made one of my designs!" she says excitedly.

"When?" I ask.

"Yesterday, Jonah offered his house as a place to make my designs and I made a dress" she says.

"Do you have it here?" I ask.

"Yeah of course" she says. She lifts up the loose floorboard under her bed and pulls out one of the most gorgeous dresses I have ever seen; it's short and strapless, with a sequinned bodice and an ombered skirt, lilac into darker purple.

"Can I try it on?" I ask.

"Well it's in my size and not yours, but if you don't mind that then sure" she says, handing me the dress.

I head into her en-suite bathroom and change into the dress. Sure it's a little big, but it actually looks really good on me. I walk back into the bedroom and twirl around in the dress.

"What do you think?" I ask.

"It looks perfect" she says, close to tears.

"What are you crying for?" I ask.

"It's the first time I've seen one of my designs actually on someone, and I'm just really happy. I'm good, I'm really good" she says.

"What made you decide to start actually making your outfits?" I ask.

"It was Jonah's idea, he said that if I made some of my designs and showed Mom and Dad how good I was then they wouldn't think my dream of being a fashion designer was ridiculous and would agree that I could go to FIT or Parsons rather than NYADA" she says.

"You could show Mom as many designs as you like, it's not going to change the fact that she's going to be disappointed that you're not going to be her mini-me, she's been preparing you for that your entire life" I say.

"I know, but I figure that if I have something to show for my dreams, she'll at least take it a little more seriously. I really want this Carly, more than I've ever wanted to be on Broadway" she says.

"Well then you have to fight for it" I say. "Can I keep this?"

"Sure, just give it back to me and I'll take it in for you this evening when I'm at Jonah's" she says and I go into the en-suite and change back into my clothes.

"Any chance that you'd mind making some more stuff like this for me?" I ask coming out and handing her the dress.

"Sure I wouldn't, in fact if you know anyone else who'd like to model for me then let me know, I figure it might be better if I show Mom and Dad the clothes on people rather than just on hangers" she says.

"I will. One day, when I'm asked who I'm wearing, I'll be able to say that I'm wearing Kennedy Hudson, and not only that, that Kennedy Hudson is my sister" I say.

"I think you're getting a little ahead of yourself Carly, I have to convince Mom and Dad to pay for fashion school first before any of that happens" she says.

"You will, you're the most determined person I know, you're not going to settle for doing anything that you aren't truly passionate about" I say.

"What about you? Thought about telling Mom about your big shot producer dreams yet?" Kennedy asks.

"I've thought about it, but Mom's never going to agree" I say.

"She doesn't have to, it's not like you need to go to college to become a producer, you could just send your mixes to record companies and see if they'll offer you a deal" she says.

"But if I'm going to move to LA, then I'm going to need money to pay for it, so I still need Mom and Dad for that" I say.

"Get a job, save some money" she says.

"I will tell them someday, just not now. You're the one who's running out of time, you're a Junior, next year Mom will be expecting you to apply to NYADA and if you get in, then you're stuck. Your dreams of being a fashion designer are dead" I say.

"I fully intend to tell them, this year. When next year comes around, I will be applying to the best fashion schools in the world, and NYADA will be a distant memory" she says.

"That's the sister I know and love" I say.

"So you make any new mixes this weekend?" she asks.

"You know I did" I say.

"Can I listen to one of them?" she asks.

"Sure" I say. "I just have to get my computer". I go back to my room, grab my computer and a pair of headphones from my desk, before returning to Kennedy's room. I hand her one of the headphones and put the other one into my own ear, and we listen to my favourite of my new mixes.

"I think we should perform this together" she says, after the mix finishes.

"But you don't even know the words" I say.

"Sure I do, you know that picking up lyrics on the first listen is one of my skills, along with my amazing clothes designing talents" she says. "Grab your guitar"

"Why would I do that? We could just sing along to the mix" I say.

"Because it will be more fun this way, now go on!" she says. I go back into my room, and grab my guitar. Then I head back to Kennedy's room and sit down on her bed. We decide which parts we're each going to do, and then I start to play and sing.

Carly:

Early morning, she wakes up

Knock, knock, knock on the door

It's time for makeup, perfect smile

It's you they're all waiting for

And they go

"Isn't she lovely, this Hollywood girl?"

Kennedy:

And they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one

And they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one

But can you tell me now, you're the lucky one

Oh, oh, oh…

Carly:

Now it's big black cars and Riviera views

And your lover in the foyer doesn't even know you

And your secrets end up splashed on the news front page

Kennedy:

And they'll tell you that you're lucky

But you're so confused

Cause you don't feel pretty, you just feel used

And all the young things line up to take your place

Another name goes up in lights, you wonder if you'll make it out alive

Carly:

She's so lucky, she's a star

But she cry, cry, cries in her lonely heart, thinking

If there's nothing missing in my life

Then why do these tears come at night?

Kennedy:

It was a few years later, I showed up here

And they still tell the legend of how you disappeared

How you took the money and your dignity, and got the hell out

They say you bought a bunch of land somewhere

Chose the Rose Garden over Madison Square

And it took some time, but I understand it now

Carly:

"Isn't she lovely, this Hollywood girl?"

Kennedy:

And they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one

And they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one

But can you tell me now, you're the lucky one

Oh, oh, oh

Carly:

She's so lucky, she's a star

But she cry, cry, cries in her lonely heart, thinking

If there's nothing missing in my life,

Then why do these tears come at night?

"That was awesome Carly!" she says giving me a hug.

"Yeah, we weren't bad were we?" I ask.

"Not bad, we were awesome!" she says. "As soon as you tell Mom and Dad about your mixes, we need to do more of these and post them online"

"Why?" I ask.

"Why? Because we sound awesome and it would definitely help you get a deal with a recording company" she says.

"Well I do already post my mixes to the website that I make them on so I suppose this is just a step up from that" I say.

"It is, besides don't we have the most fun singing together?" she asks.

"We do, and our voices do sound great together. I'll make a deal with you, we sing some of my mixes together and record them, but we don't post them online until both of us have told Mom and Dad what we really want to do with the rest of our lives" I say, holding out my hand.

"Deal" she says, shaking my hand.

"So about this whole modelling thing, do I get any input on what I wear?" I ask, smirking cheekily.

"Don't push it" she says, pushing me gently, and making me laugh. "So how many people know about your secret hobby? Just me?" she asks.

"You, Leigh, Rose, Jessie and Eli, but that's it" I say. "What about you?" I ask.

"You and Jonah" she says.

"No one else?" I ask.

"The number of people I hang out with at school can be counted on one hand, I spend most of my time with Jonah, and there's no one else I trust enough to keep my secret" she says.

"Are you and Jonah ever going to get together?" I ask.

"Whoa, weird change of subject" she says.

"Just answer the question Kennedy" I say.

"I don't see him that way, I told Mom as much when she asked me about it yesterday. I don't get why you're all so convinced that I like Jonah" she says.

"Maybe because you spend every waking minute that you're not in the house with him" I say.

"Because we're best friends, you spend a lot of time with Eli and I don't say that you're in love with him" she says.

"That's different, Eli and I haven't been friends since we were in Kindergarten" I say.

"So just because we've been friends for a long time, I have to be interested in him?" she asks.

"That's not what I meant and you know it" I say.

"What did you mean?" she asks.

"I meant that he's the only one aside from me that you've told your big secret to, and I bet he knows things about you that I don't" I say.

"Of course he does, you're my sister, and there are some things I just can't tell you" she says.

"And what do you call the only guy who you can tell everything to?" I ask.

"Your boyfriend, I guess but Jonah is my best friend, not my boyfriend and people can have guy friends" she says.

"I know they can, all I'm saying is that you see Jonah as more than a friend, and it's obvious to anyone who sees the two of you together that you want to be more than just friends" I say.

"What makes it so obvious? It's not obvious to me" she says.

"It's never obvious to the people themselves, but it's there. He likes you too, have you never wondered why the only long term female relationship in his life aside from his mother and his sister is you? That's not accident, none of his relationships ever work out because he wants to be with you" I say.

"That never crossed my mind, I just thought he was the ultimate player" she says.

"I'm telling you he likes you" I say.

"Well if you'd said that before yesterday, I wouldn't have believed you but the weirdest thing happened yesterday" she says.

"What was it?" I ask.

"He overheard me and Mom talking about this after my glee audition, and he broke his hand, I guess by punching the wall" she says.

"What did you tell her?" I ask.

"That I liked him as a friend, but didn't think I could ever see him as boyfriend" she says.

"He probably got angry because he likes you and was frustrated that you didn't feel the same way, even though I maintain that you so do" I say.

"That's what I thought, but it doesn't make any sense. How can he go from seeing me as a friend to seeing me as a possible girlfriend?" she asks.

"The same way anyone who has been friends with someone, goes from being friends to more than that, one day you just realize that they mean more to you than you thought" I say.

"Says the girl who hasn't had a boyfriend, ever" she says, laughing gently.

"Fine, I will admit my main source of information is TV shows or romantic comedies, but I still think my advice is true to life" I say.

"So if this were a romantic comedy, or a TV show, what would I do to find out whether I like him, oh wise guru?" she asks with a glimmer in her eye. I smack her playfully before answering.

"Kiss him, if you feel something then you talk to him about it and see if he feels the same way and then go from there. If you don't feel anything then again talk to him about it and explain that you just want to be friends" I say.

"That's not bad advice for a rookie, thanks Carly. Now I just need to find an excuse to kiss my best friend" she says.

"I'm not helping you with that one, you can deal with that yourself" I say.

"You've helped enough, I'm sure I can manage to figure out the last part for myself" she says.

We are interrupted by my mother calling up the stairs. "KENNEDY, CARLY, if you don't get down here now then your breakfast is going to get cold"

"More importantly everyone else's is, because Mom refuses to let us start until you two get down here" Shay interjects. We both laugh, and make our way downstairs.

Mom places a plate of pancakes in front of everyone. "Dig in" she says, sitting down herself and starting to eat her own pancakes.

"What were you guys singing?" Shay asks. "I heard you from across the hall"

"Oh, it was just a mash-up I found online" I say, sharing a secretive look with Kennedy. This is my go-to excuse whenever anyone who doesn't know about my mixes hears one of them, since I have a tendency to whistle my mixes when I'm bored.

"It sounded good anyway" Shay says.

"Speaking of singing, you are going to be auditioning for Glee club aren't you Carly?" Mom asks.

"Yeah, at some point today" I say. I wish I could audition with one of my mixes but that would bring up too many questions, so I decided to use my talent with the cup song to do something else.

"At least she didn't force you to join" Shay says sullenly.

"That was your father not me Savannah, and I really wish you would stop being so angry about it, it's not as if you're going to be doing something you hate, you like singing and dancing, so I don't see what the problem is" she says.

"The problem is that it wasn't my choice to do this, and I refuse to be happy about something that I was forced into doing" Shay says, getting up from the table, and slamming the door behind her as she storms out.

"Should I get that?" Dad asks.

"No just leave her be, I'll go talk to her when she's calmed down, I'm the one she's mad at" Mom says.

"Why would she be mad at you? I'm the one who forced her into joining Glee" Dad says.

"She's a Daddy's girl, she couldn't be mad at you if she tried" Mom says.

"Do you think I made the right decision forcing her to join Glee?" Dad asks.

"You had to Finn; she couldn't get away with being so rude. It'll be good for her to realize that she can't always get what she wants" Mom says.

"She reminds me so much of you" Dad says.

"Maybe, but I had to grow up and so does she" Mom says.

"You guys realize we're still here right?" I ask, since Mom and Dad have been talking like we're not in the room.

"Sorry Carly. So how's school been going for you?" Mom asks.

"Great, actually. I joined Orchestra and Chorus and I've been hanging out with Rose, Jessie, Eli and Leigh a lot. The work's harder and there are the same jerks there that there were in middle school, but it's good" I say.

"And Shay and Kennedy have been looking out for you?" she asks.

"I don't need them to, but I know if anyone hurts me that they have my back" I say, smiling at Kennedy.

"And your grades are good?" Dad asks.

"Dad I literally just started high school a week ago, we haven't even had a test in any of my subjects yet" I say. I'm not looking forward to when it finally happens; I hate studying and homework, all of the stuff to do with school really, aside from spending time with my friends. It's not as if I'm going to need any of it to be an amazing music producer.

"What about you Kennedy?" Dad asks, turning to face my sister.

"Well I'm not in the running for valedictorian like Shay, but I'm doing okay, my GPA is pretty good" I say.

"She's got to keep it up if she's going to get into NYADA, right Kennedy?" Mom says.

"Right Mom. Come on Carly, we need to get going or we're going to be late for school" she says, an obvious way to avoid talking about NYADA. She does this most of the time, avoids the subject of NYADA as often as she can and only talks about it enough so that Mom doesn't get suspicious.

"Shay's taking her own car to school right?" I ask.

"Yeah she will be, once she's calmed down from her hissy fit. You girls go" Mom says.

We walk out to the car together, me getting in on the passenger side, Kennedy on the driver's side. I can't wait till I'm old enough to drive, but there's still two more stupid years until that can happen.

"You know that you can't keep avoiding talking about NYADA with Mom, right?" I ask.

"I know. I'm just a coward and it's easier to avoid the subject than talk to her about it" she says.

"I can't exactly judge, I'm a coward too" I say. We continue talking all the way to school, and I'm almost sad when Kennedy's car pulls into the parking lot, because we were having a really great sisterly chat. We say goodbye to each other, and she heads off to find Jonah, whereas I head to the canteen where I know I'll find my friends.

The day passes relatively quickly from there, luckily I have English and Spanish, both subjects that I enjoy (as much as you can enjoy anything at school), and after Spanish is over, and break time has begun, I head over to the auditorium, having grabbed an empty glass from the canteen before going there.

"Hey sweetie, how's your day been so far?" Mom asks, after I walk onto the stage in the auditorium.

"It's been good so far, but it's only the beginning of the day and I haven't had Math yet" I say, making Mom laugh.

"No one's been bullying you? No slushies? Dumpster dives? Patriotic wedgies?" she asks.

"Eww no. What even is a patriotic wedgie?" I ask.

"They hoist you up the flagpole by your underwear. It never happened to me, but the kids used to do it when I was in high school" she says.

"Calm down Mom okay? Everyone here loves me, I'm friendly, and happy and positive and people like that" I say.

"Okay, I'm just worried about you that' all" she says.

"Well don't be, I'm fine" I reply.

"What's with the cup?" Aunt Quinn asks.

"It's for my number" I say.

"Which is?" she asks.

"Call Your Girlfriend by Robyn" I reply.

"Well I have to say I'm intrigued Carly. Let's hear it" she says.

I start the cup beat, before beginning to sing my song, carrying out the cup beat as I sing.

Carly:

Call your girlfriend

I think it's time you talk…

Give your reasons; say it's not her fault

But you, just met somebody new….

Tell her not to get upset, second guessing everything you said and done

And when she gets upset, tell her you never meant to hurt no one

Then tell her that the only way her heart will mend is when she learns to love again

And it won't make sense right now but you're still her friend and then you let her down easy….

Call your girlfriend; think it's time you talk…

Give your reasons; say it's not her fault…

But you, just met somebody new…

And tell her how I give you something that you never even knew you missed…

Don't you even try to explain how it's so different when we kiss…

And tell her that the only way her heart will mend

Is when she learns to love again

But it won't make sense right now but you're still her friend, and then you let her down easy….

"So that's it" I say shrugging. I'm not like Shay, who's incredibly conceited about anything that she's good at, since I find that doesn't exactly win you any favours. I know I'm a good singer, and a good dancer but I don't go around telling everyone. I try to let the music speak for itself.

"I knew you'd watched that Pitch Perfect movie too many times" Mom says laughing. It's true; Pitch Perfect is one of my favourite movies. I learned the cup song in one afternoon when I was eleven, by replaying the scene where Anna Kendrick does it over and over again and copying it until I could do it myself. I guess I love the movie so much, because I identify a lot with Beca's dreams, but also Fat Amy and Chloe's personalities.

"That was great Carly, a truly original audition" Quinn says.

"So I'm in?" I ask.

"Yes you're in" she replies.

"The first glee rehearsal is on Friday, in the choir room at four. Don't be late" Mom says.

"I won't be. Bye Mom, Bye Aunt Quinn" I say, walking off the stage. I head to my locker to get my books for the next lesson. I open the locker, and get my books out. I jump backwards in surprise when I close the locker door and see a cute boy standing next to me who I hadn't seen before. I trip over my own feet, and fall the ground, my cheeks flushing bright red in embarrassment.

He holds out his hand to help me up, and I take it, wishing that I hadn't braided my bangs back so that I could cover my face right now.

"Careful there, you could hurt yourself" he says.

"Who are you and what were you doing standing next to my locker?" I ask.

"Chuck Baker and my locker's next to yours" he says.

"But you must have been standing there for a while, because you're holding your books and I didn't hear your locker shut" I say.

"Okay, you got me, I was waiting for you" he says.

"Why's that?" I ask.

"Because I think you're really pretty" he says.

"I don't know whether I should be creeped out or flattered" I say.

"Flattered I hope" he says.

"I'm….." I start to say but he interrupts me.

"Carly Hudson I know, you're the Principal's daughter" he says.

"Don't shout it too loudly; the other kids don't exactly take too well to knowing that I'm the principal's daughter. They think it means I can get away with anything" I say.

"Can you?" he asks.

"No, but then I never do anything to land myself in detention. Kennedy on the other hand has been there a thousand times, but it's usually because of something Jonah talked her into doing" I say.

"Kennedy is?" he asks.

"Oh, my sister" I reply.

"So are you a freshman or what? I mean I haven't seen you around here before" I say.

"Yeah I'm a freshman. I'm actually new to Lima anyway, I just moved here from Cincinnati" he says.

"How come?" I ask.

"Well it's the same old story, Mom and Dad meet and fall in love in high school, get married after graduation, grow up and realise they have nothing in common and start to argue all the time, decide to have a kid to save their marriage, stay married for years even though they hate each other just for the kid, and then finally decide they can't stand each other and get a divorce. Dad sues Mom for full custody and drags kid out to Lima and that's the end of my sad story" he says.

"I'm sorry to hear that" I say.

"It's fine, it's not like I didn't see it coming. My earliest memory of my parents is of them arguing, they spent my entire life doing it. To be honest, when they got divorced I was relieved that it was all over. I was sick of being their rope in their tug of war & I know it sounds awful to say, but I almost wish they'd got divorced earlier. Still, I kind of miss Cincinnati, it's not quite the same here" he says.

"How long have you been here?" I ask.

"About three weeks now" he says.

"I could always show you around some of my favourite haunts, I mean if you'd like" I say.

"That would be nice" he says. "Would you consider going out with me?" he asks, an abrupt change of subject.

"You don't even know me" I say.

"Is that not what dating is for? Getting to know each other?" he asks.

"You make a good point and I would like to get to know you better. What did you have in mind?" I ask.

"I was thinking I'd take you for dinner at one of my old haunts in Cincinnati" he says.

"Who would take us there?" I ask.

"Well I'd say my dad, but he refuses to be in the same city as my mother, so I'm kind of stuck there" he says.

"Wow your parents' divorce must have been really nasty" I remark.

"Over a decade of resentment towards each other kind of does that" he says.

"My sister could drive us" I say.

"Which one, the bitchy cheerio or Kennedy?" he asks.

"How come you know who Shay is?" I ask.

"Oh, she gave me a very icy welcome, quite literally, she threw a slushie in my face" he says.

"I'm sorry about that" I say.

"It's fine. It was kind of weird, as soon as she did it, she offered to help me clean off" he says.

"That's Shay, she can be a real bitch but she can't stand people hating her, so don't be surprised if she tries to become your new BFF, it's kind of her thing. But the sister I meant that could drive us was Kennedy, not Shay" I say.

"Okay, what do you say I meet you at your house at 7 next Saturday and we go for dinner together? It doesn't even have to be a date if you don't want it to be, just two new friends getting to know each other" he says.

"I think we can call it a date. I'll see you then. It was nice to meet you Chuck Baker" I say.

"Nice to meet you too Carly Hudson" he says. I head off to my next class, and as I do, I check over my shoulder to see if he's watching as I walk away. He is, so I throw him a quick wink and he smiles back at me.

I have a feeling this could be the start of something special.

Ginny's POV

Every morning, I wake up at 6 am. I hate getting up late, it makes me feel like I'm missing out on something, and that might be stupid but it's the way I feel. After I wake up, I take a shower, the place where I'm most often found singing. I love to sing, but I've never actually sung in front of an audience before, I always sing where no one can hear me, only my family have ever heard me sing before and that's pretty much just because the walls of our house are incredibly thin. I'm kind of scared that everyone will hate the way my voice sounds. Rose has such a pretty voice, and her voice is much higher than mine & Shannon has a really pretty voice as well, I'm afraid that because my voice is lower than theirs, people won't think it sounds as good. But I've decided that I'm going to audition for Glee Club. It will be good for me to get over at least one of my insecurities, and I really do love to sing. So I choose the most perfect song to sing in the shower about how I'm feeling today.

Ginny:

What you're gonna do with the 36 cents

Sticky with coke on your floorboard

When a woman on the street is huddled in the cold

On a sidewalk bench trying to keep warm

Do you call her over, hand her the change

Ask her her story, ask her her name

Or do you tell yourself

"You're just a fool, just a fool to believe you can change the world"

"You're just a fool, just a fool to believe you change the world"

What you're gonna do when you're watching TV

And an ad comes on, yeah, you know the kind

Flashing up pictures of a child in need

For a dime a day, you could save a life

Do you call the number, reach out a hand

Or do you change the channel, call it a scam

Do you tell yourself

"You're just a fool, just a fool to believe you can change the world"

Don't listen to them when they say

"You're just a fool, just a fool to believe you can change the world"

Oh, the smallest thing can make all the difference

Love is alive; don't listen to them when they say

"You're just a fool, just a fool to believe you can change the world"

The world's so big; it can break your heart

And you just want to help, not sure where to start

So you close your eyes

And send up a prayer into the dark

"You're just a fool, just a fool to believe you can change the world"

Don't listen to them when they say

"You're just a fool, just a fool to believe you can change the world"

Oh, the smallest thing can make all the difference

Love is alive; don't listen to them when they say

"You're just a fool, just a fool to believe you can change the world"

It's one of my favourite songs that one, it always makes me feel better when I'm feeling down. I stay in the shower for a few minutes longer, washing the last of the conditioner out of my hair before getting out. I dry myself, then my hair before brushing my teeth. I go over to my wardrobe and pick out an outfit to wear. I don't like people noticing me, I don't want to dress like an attention whore, so my wardrobe consists of entirely dark clothing, mostly black with some dark blue, and it is all loose fitting. Today, I pick out a pair of black and white check pants, a black blouse with white polka dots, my oversize black cardigan, a pair of black converses and my butterfly necklace which I always wear because it is my good luck necklace. Some people may think it's weird that I have a necklace that I wear for good luck but I truly believe it works, besides which it goes with every single outfit that I own.

Once I am dressed, I unlock the top drawer of my dresser, and bring out my writer's notebook, the notebook where I write all of my stories in. I'm currently working on a short story, it's kind of a twisted version of Cinderella, in which the Prince is a dark character, rather than being the love of her life, he turns out to be abusive. I never let anyone read any of my stories, because I don't want them to say that they're bad and kill my dream of becoming a bestselling author. I've been dreaming of that since I first learned to read, touching people's lives with the written word would be a dream come true for me. It's never going to happen, most likely I'll never be a famous author but a girl can dream right?

I barely hear my mother when she calls me down for breakfast; I'm so engrossed in my twisted version of Cinderella. She has to call a second time before I hear her and then I lock my notebook back in the drawer before making my way downstairs. Rose and Shannon are already there, along with my mom and dad.

"Morning" I say.

"Morning Ginny, why so late for breakfast this morning? Usually by the time we're ready to have breakfast, you've already eaten" Rose says.

"I was reading and lost track of time" I say. It might not be true, but it's a plausible excuse. I don't even tell people that I write, because then they'll ask to see it and I don't want to show them, so if I ever lose track of time whilst writing, I just say I was reading or doing homework.

"I had to reheat your waffles, but I think they're still okay" Mom says, placing a plate of waffles in front of me. I squirt some maple syrup onto them, and then spoon out some strawberries before digging in.

"So are you going to audition for Glee today then Ginny?" Mom asks me.

"I already told you I would" I say.

"Good, it would be great for you to be involved in some clubs at school. You've been at that school three years and haven't joined in on any clubs" she says.

"Well I'm going to join Glee so you don't need to bug me about it" I say.

"I wasn't trying to honey; I just get worried about you sometimes. You spend so much time alone, just writing in that notebook rather than actually spending time with people" she says.

"I like it that way" I reply briefly. It's true; I do prefer my own company to the company of anyone else. You can't get hurt if you don't let anyone close enough to hurt you.

"I know you do, but just try. Please, for me?" Mom asks.

"Fine I will try to make more friends this year" I mutter, knowing that it's never going to happen. I can't make lots of friends; large crowds of people make me incredibly anxious so the largest group of people I can hang around with is maybe four at most. I currently have exactly two friends Sierra Hummel-Anderson, who is really more of an acquaintance than a friend and Jenna Cartwright, a deaf girl, who is just as much of an outcast as I am. Jenna and I have been friends since I was six, and we communicate mainly via sign language which ironically means I can talk to her better than anyone else because we don't speak in the conventional way.

"Good" Mom replies.

"May I be excused?" Shannon asks. Actually if your sister counts, my friend count is up to three, as Shannon and I are pretty close, we spend a lot of time together talking about books. She always does this, eats barely any of her food and asks to be excused. I'm pretty sure she has an eating disorder, and I would tell Mom and Dad, but it's not my secret to tell. Besides I don't have any actual evidence, just the fact that she asks to be excused whenever there's food around. It's not like I've actually seen her throwing up, and she doesn't seem to be overly thin. I decide to follow her to find out where she's going. To my relief, she hasn't gone to the bathroom, simply upstairs to her room. She's lying on her bed, drawing.

"What's that?" I ask.

"Nothing" she says, sitting up so that I can't see what she's drawing. It's hard to get a read on Shannon, she's very secretive, and she'll never tell you anything unless she wants to. It's understandable, considering what a hard life she had before she was adopted by our mom and dad but sometimes I wish I could just read her mind.

"Are you okay? You didn't seem to eat much at breakfast" I say.

"I'm not hungry" she says averting her eyes away from me and back to her drawing.

"You can talk to me, you know that right?" I ask.

"I don't want to talk to anyone about my problems, I would have thought you of all people would understand about that" she says.

"I guess I do" I say.

"I really don't want to talk, if that's alright" she says.

"Fine, we won't talk, I'll just get my notebook and we can sit in silence" I say. We do this a lot, simply sit in silence doing our own thing, I'm usually reading or writing and Shannon is usually reading or drawing. To most people it might seem weird that we can sit in a room together for hours on end and not say a word to each other but we're more comfortable that way since neither of us are big talkers. I go to my room and fetch my notebook and get lost in my twisted Cinderella story, whilst Shannon sketches furiously.

A while later, Mom calls us down to leave for school. "You go ahead, I just need to go grab my bag from my room" I say. Shannon looks at me suspiciously, but turns and walks out of the room. Once I hear her footsteps disappearing down the stairs, I jump onto the bed, and look at what she drew. She's drawn a picture of a girl staring in a mirror. This wouldn't be unusual except for the fact that the girl is of ordinary size, and her reflection looks about twice her size. Written underneath the picture are the words, "Self Portrait". Is this really how she sees herself? Or am I just reading too much into this?

"Ginny come on! If you want to cycle to school, you need to leave now" Mom calls.

"Coming!" I call. I leave the drawing as it was, face down on the bed. I prefer to cycle to school than taking the car, because cycling means I'm not required to talk to anyone. I'm not trying to be rude or anything, I just don't really like talking to people and cycling gives me time to just be alone with my thoughts for a while. Besides since I'm not really big on sports, cycling is a good way of getting in daily exercise.

It takes me about half an hour to cycle to school, and as soon as I get there, I immediately head for the library as I do every day before school. The library is my favourite place in the entire school; I can just sit and read or write for hours in there without having to worry about people talking to me, or having to talk to other people.

Scanning the room, I spot Jenna sitting alone in the corner of the library. I walk towards her, making sure to approach from the side rather than the back so that she can see me. She hates it when people sneak up on her, so I always make sure than she can see me before approaching her.

"Hi Ginny" she signs when she sees me. She taught me some basic sign language when we were little kids and as we grew up, I looked up signs on the internet. I'm pretty good at it by now; I even help out at one of the after school writing classes for deaf kids at Aunt Betty's school. Although I'm not deaf, it's actually a lot easier for me to communicate in this way because it's not talking, at least not in the same way.

"Hi Jenna, how are you?" I sign.

"Good" she signs back.

"Me too" I sign. "How's your mom?" I add. Jenna's mom has kidney failure and is currently on dialysis. She'll eventually need a kidney transplant, but neither Jenna, her father or her brother are a match for her. It's hard for Jenna, she's so close to her mom and she hates seeing her in pain and knowing that she can't help her.

"The same as always, she's no better and no worse" she signs.

"I could get tested, if you want" I sign.

"I appreciate that, but it would be weird" she signs back. "Can we talk about something else? How are you?" she signs. I accept the change of subject, knowing that she finds talking about her mom difficult.

"Sure. What do you want to talk about?" I sign.

"How are you?" she signs.

"I'm okay. I'm worried about Shannon" I sign.

"How come?" she signs back.

"I think she might have an eating disorder. She barely eats anything at mealtimes and then asks to be excused, and this morning I found a kind of disturbing drawing she'd done" I sign, one of the longest sentences I've ever had to sign.

"How exactly was it disturbing?" Jenna signs.

"She drew a picture of herself, standing in front of a mirror. Her reflection was like twice her size" I sign.

"Was she doing a school project? Like they had to draw what they thought someone with an eating disorder saw when they look in a mirror?" she signs back.

"I don't think so, this was a personal drawing. Plus she titled it "Self-Portrait"? Doesn't that seem strange?" I sign.

"A little, but I think you need to talk to her first. Don't jump to conclusions, without speaking to her" she signs.

"Okay but if I'm still worried?" I sign.

"Then talk to your parents. If she does have an eating disorder then you need to make sure it doesn't get too bad" she signs.

"Thanks Jenna, you always give me great advice" I sign.

"Glad to be helpful" she signs.

"I brought something for you" I sign. I take the book out of my bag. It's a first edition copy of Jenna's favourite book, Moby Dick, so rare nowadays since it's such an old book, but I managed to find one at an antique store in Columbus.

"What's this for? It's not my birthday?" she signs, looking touched at the gesture.

"I know but you've been through such a crappy time lately with your mom being sick and everything that I thought you deserved something special" I sign.

"You're the best friend ever, thank you so much" she signs giving me a huge hug. I feel guilty when she says that, because it's not true. Great friends share all their secrets, and whilst Jenna tells me everything, there's one very important thing I'm hiding from her. I'm bi-asexual and yes that's a thing. Bi-asexual means that I'm attracted to both girls and guys, but I'm not interested in having sex. I'm scared of telling people because I don't think they'll believe me. It's not like I know anyone else like me, there might be LGBT kids at this school but they're not Bi-asexual like me.

"How's your writing been going?" she signs.

"Good, I just started a new story" I sign.

"Can I read it?" she signs.

"You know I don't let anyone read my stories" I sign.

"But I've always wanted to and you know I won't judge" she signs.

She makes a good point, I know that she won't judge my stories; I'm just scared of showing them to anyone in case they don't think they're good. It's part of my social anxiety, I'm always scared of being criticised even by friends.

"I'm sorry, I just can't. It's nothing to do with you, it's me" I sign.

"That's okay, I don't want to push you into doing something you're not ready for" she signs.

"I will let you read them one day, I promise. Just not yet" I sign.

"So what are your plans for today?" she signs.

"The usual, school, oh and I'm going to audition for Glee Club" I sign.

"I wish I could hear you sing" she signs, looking slightly wistful.

"You never know, one day you might" I sign, stroking her back comfortingly. I'm never quite sure what to say when she's like this, all I can do is try to comfort her. Her parents can't afford cochlear implants, even though she desperately wants to be able to hear. Our conversation kind of lapses after this, we just sit and read until the bell goes, quite content without signing, comfortable without conversation. This is one of the reasons we're best friends. I sign to Jenna to tell her that the bell has gone and then we walk to History together. We have most of our classes together, which is great because neither of us really like talking to anyone else, me because of my social anxiety and Jenna because of her deafness. It's a myth that deaf people cannot speak, they can, it all depends on the amount of hearing ability they have anyway and when they became deaf. Jenna has been deaf from birth, so she never heard other people's voices and so could not imitate it so she has never learned to speak properly. She can speak, but her speech is fairly unintelligible and she gets embarrassed so she prefers to use sign language but there are deaf people that can speak normally.

I head to my audition at lunchtime. "Hi Mom, Aunt Rachel" I say as I walk out onto the stage.

"Hi Ginny, how's your day been sweetie?" Mom asks.

"It's been great" I say. I love school, besides I'm really good at it, I spend most of my time studying in order to avoid other people.

"Made any new friends?" she asks hopefully.

"Not yet" I reply. I smile as I notice Jenna walking into the auditorium and start to sign so that she can understand our conversation.

"I'm sure she's fine Quinn, you know she's always been on the quieter side. You can't force her to make friends if she doesn't want to" Aunt Rachel says.

"I know, I just wish she would" Mom says.

"What are you going to be singing today Ginny?" Aunt Rachel asks me.

"Happy Little Pill by Troye Sivan" I say, making sure that I'm looking at Jenna and signing as I speak.

"Sounds great, let's hear it" Mom says.

I start to sing, signing as I do so, so that Jenna can understand what I'm saying. I've never tried to sign a song before, so some of the words are probably a little off, but I try my best.

Ginny:

In the crowd alone

And every second passing reminds me I'm not whole

Bright lights and city sounds are ringing like a drone

Unknown, unknown

Oh, glazed eyes, empty hearts

Buying happy from shopping carts

Nothing but time to kill

Sipping life from bottles

Tight skin, bodyguards

Gucci down the boulevard

Cocaine, dollar bills

And…

My happy little pill

Take me away

Dry my eyes

Bring colour to my skies

My sweet little pill

Tame my hunger

Light within

Know my skin

Like a wreck a floor

Sweat and conversations seep into my bones

Four walls are not enough

I'll take a dip into the unknown, unknown

Oh, glazed eyes, empty hearts

Buying happy from shopping carts

Nothing but time to kill

Sipping life from bottles

Tight skin, bodyguards

Gucci down the boulevard

Cocaine, dollar bills

And…..

My happy little pill

Take me away

Dry my eyes

Bring colour to my skies

My sweet little pill

Tame my hunger

Light within

Know my skin

Oh, glazed eyes, empty hearts

Buying happy from shopping carts

Nothing but time to kill

Sipping life from bottles

Tight skin, bodyguards

Gucci down the boulevard

Cocaine, dollar bills

And….

My happy little pill

Take me away

Dry my eyes

Bring colour to my skies

My sweet little pill

Tame my hunger

Light within

Know my skin

"Well Ginny that was lovely, looks like all that singing in the shower paid off" Mom says. I hide my crimson face under my dark hair so she can't see how embarrassed I am. I like being praised, I do, but I also find it a little embarrassing, like I do not truly deserve the praise that I've been given.

"Does this mean I got in?" I ask.

"Yes, you're in Ginny" Mom says.

"First rehearsal is Friday, at four in the choir room" Aunt Rachel says. "Don't be late" she adds.

"Oh, please, I'm never late" I say, signing as I go, making Jenna laugh in the slightly strange way that she does, and Mom and Aunt Rachel too. As well as my quietness, I'm well known for my punctuality. I walk over to where Jenna is sitting and we walk out of the auditorium together.

"Your signing was pretty good, if a little messy in places. I'm sure your voice was pretty too, but I obviously don't know" she signs.

"Thanks. I know it was messy, I wasn't expecting you to be there and there were some words in that song that I didn't know the signs for" I sign.

"You did well though" she signs back.

"I wasn't expecting you to be there, I'm glad you came though" I sign.

"I wanted to support you, deaf or not. I'm hoping that one day; I'll be able to hear you sing for real" she signs.

"I hope you will too" I sign back.

"Do you want to go and get a drink? At the shake shack maybe?" she signs. The shake shack is our favourite place to hang out and do homework after school.

"Have I ever been known to say no to a chocolate milkshake?" I sign.

"Never" she signs smiling.

"Let's go then" I sign and we link arms, walking out of school together.

Shannon's POV

Flashback

I am in bed when I hear the door open, and I duck under my covers when I hear the clicking of my mommy's big shoes walking through the door.

"Where are you, you ungrateful little toad?" Mommy calls. I keep quiet, hoping that if I say nothing then Mommy won't hurt me again. It's never worked in the past, but I want it to this time. She falls on the stairs several times, and I hope that each time she does, she won't get up. The clicking gets closer and closer and I have to cover my mouth with my hands to stop from screaming.

I hear her opening the door to each room and sink further down under the covers. Eventually, I hear the door to my room swing open. My mommy's heels click toward me, each click making me dig my teeth further into my lip, causing my bottom lip to bleed. She pulls the covers away from me, lifting me up by the collar of my pyjama shirt.

"When I call for you, you answer!" she yells, slurring her words slightly.

"I'm sorry Mommy" I whisper quietly.

"You are such an ungrateful little child. I have given up my whole life for you. Your no-good father left me with you little rat and now my entire life revolves around you! I should have got rid of you when I had the chance" she says. I cower in the corner, waiting for the pain that I know is coming. She lifts my pyjama top up, and turns me around so my back is facing her.

"Please don't" I whimper.

"I don't take orders from you, you little whimp" she says. She brings the bottle down hard on my back, the glass shattering into tiny pieces which stick in my back. I sob into my hands, trying not to scream from the pain. My mommy has a smile on her face, I'm not sure why. It seems to please her to hurt me. I hold out my hands, wanting my mommy to comfort me, but she doesn't. She pushes me back down and I scream as my cuts touch the floor. Then I hear the clicking of her heels away from me, leaving me alone like she always does after hurting me.

End of flashback

I wake up screaming, looking around my room to check whether my mom is there. I was half expecting to find her face looming over mine, an empty wine bottle in her hand ready to hit me again. Once I'm sure she's not there, I gingerly get out of bed and walk across the hall to the bathroom. I dampen a cloth and wipe my sweaty forehead with it. I turn the light on, and turn to face the mirror. I hate looking in the mirror, the girl I see staring back at me is so ugly. She's fat and disgusting, and no matter how much I starve myself, or exercise, or purge, that doesn't seem to change. I don't want to be that sad, horrible looking girl; I want to look pretty and thin like all the other girls at school and finally be happy. But I can't be happy, because I'm ugly and no one loves me. How could anyone love someone as damaged as me? I lift up my shirt, to reveal the scars that run across my back, faded by now, but still very much there. Each one marks a spot where my mother whacked me with a wine bottle, shows how damaged I am on the outside. But no one can see the scars on the inside, the ones that come from knowing that your mother will never love you, at least not your birth mother, and from hating yourself more and more every single day. I turn away from the mirror, not able to stand looking at my reflection anymore. I turn the water on in the bath, so that what I'm about to do won't be heard by anyone else in the house. Holding my hair back, I lean over the toilet bowl and stick two fingers down my throat, vomiting what little I have eaten today. I feel a great sense of relief once I've done it, knowing I might be that little bit closer to being the girl I really want to be. I wipe my mouth with a bit of toilet paper and then flush the toilet. I'm not stupid, I know what they call it, but is it so wrong to want to be happy? To want to feel thin and beautiful? I don't think so.

I head back to my room, and I jump backwards when I swing open the door and find my mother sitting in the chair next to my bed. "What are you doing here?" I ask.

"I heard you screaming. I came in to see if you were okay, but you weren't here" she says.

"I went to the bathroom" I say nervously, hoping she didn't hear me throwing up.

"Are you okay?" she asks.

"I'm fine" I say. I'm really not, but she doesn't need to know that. My mom and I have a difficult relationship, to say the least. She's just so perfect, so beautiful and I would do anything to be like her, rather than the shell of a girl that I actually am. Besides we don't really have anything in common, she was the pretty, popular cheerleader and I'm the quiet, nerdy kid who doesn't like to be around people.

"Are you sure? You had that dream again didn't you? The one with your mom?" she asks.

"You are my mom, she was my mother. Besides, it's not a dream, it's a memory" I say.

"You really should talk to someone about that, it might make you feel better" she says.

"NO!" I snap, suddenly on the defensive. I hate talking to people about my problems, it's none of their business, and it's my life, not theirs.

"It was just a suggestion" she replies softly, but I can see the hurt in her eyes.

"Well I don't need your suggestions! I don't want some stranger prying into my personal business!" I yell.

"It might help you" she says.

"I don't need any help!" I insist. It's not true, I probably need help more than most people but I don't want it. I like to deal with things by myself.

"If you don't want to talk to strangers, then why don't you talk to me? Whatever you want to say Shannon, I will listen" she says.

"I don't want to say anything" I say.

"How can I help you if you don't talk to me?" she asks, frustrated.

"You can't" I say bitterly.

"I could try if you just let me" she says, crying a little.

"I don't want you to! I just want you to leave me alone!" I scream. She turns away, without saying anything and shuts my door gently as she leaves my room. I feel awful for being so rude to her, she saved me from my horrible birth mother, and in return I am an ungrateful child, who doesn't appreciate how good I have it, exactly like my mother said, but in this case it's true. I'm being awful to the woman who saved my life, probably because I'm a disgusting, ugly person. I get out of bed, and lift a loose floorboard. I take out a first aid kit, a bag of used bandages and a razor blade. I roll up my pyjama sleeve, unwrapping the bandages on my left arm to reveal the scars, still an angry red now, but they will fade to white like my older ones eventually, still visible but fainter. I run the blade over my skin, wincing only slightly at the pain. When I first did it, I had to bite my bottom lip to stop myself from screaming, but I've got used to it now. I quickly bandage my arm so that no blood spills anywhere and efficiently work my way upwards, digging slightly deeper each time, and bandaging the previous one before moving on. People might wonder what sick person hurts themselves the way I do, but trust me when I say that most of the time; physical pain hurts way less than emotional pain.

I settle down back into bed, but I can't sleep. I don't want to go back to sleep, I'll just have that nightmare again. I get up out of bed and take a pencil and paper out of my desk drawer. When I can't sleep, I like to draw, although the only thing on my mind right now is my mother. I draw my greatest fear, me lying in bed here and her climbing in through the window to get to me again. Although logically I know it can't happen, I always make sure the window is closed; it's always there in the back of my mind.

I hear three sharp knocks on my door. "Come in" I call, knowing it's my dad, since he's the only one in the house who knocks like that.

"I came to see if you were okay. I'm sorry I wasn't here when you woke up from your nightmare, your mother wanted to speak to you. I guess that wasn't such a good idea, huh?" he asks.

"Not so much" I reply.

"She wants to help you because she cares" Dad says.

"I know that" I say. I really do, that's why I feel so bad when I get angry at her. "You're not going to ask me about it are you?" I ask.

"No. In fact I just thought I'd sit here with you until you fell asleep" he says.

"Thank you" I say, smiling at him. He pulls up the chair next to my bed and takes my hand, watching as I slowly drift off to sleep.

When I wake up the next morning, my dad is lying next to me. It takes me a moment to work out why he's there, but then I remember the second nightmare I had during the night, the one where my mother came into my room and strangled me to death, well almost, I woke up before she crushed my windpipe. I wish there would be a night where I could just go to sleep without her invading my dreams. Even though I was adopted eleven years ago, it feels like she's still with me, haunting me.

"Are you okay sweetheart?" Dad asks me, stroking my hair.

"I'm fine, I didn't have any more nightmares after that last one" I say. "Do you mind Dad; I need to get changed for school?" I add.

"No problem. I'll be downstairs, helping your mom with breakfast. Be down in half an hour okay?" Dad says.

"Okay Dad, I will be" I say. As soon as he leaves, I start to rummage through my closet to find an outfit to wear for today. I decide on a pair of blue skinny jeans, my multi-coloured tank top, my oversized green off the shoulder sweatshirt, a pair of green converses, my mockingjay necklace and a bracelet that my parents gave me with the name Beth on it. I have no idea who Beth is, or how my parents know her, but it's a pretty bracelet so I wear it anyway. I take a quick shower, before changing into my outfit. After I've showered, I spend the rest of my time before breakfast, reading my assigned book for English at the moment, Looking For Alaska. I quite like it, it's better than the Fault In Our Stars anyway, although I'm not sure that John Green is my favourite author. I much prefer Suzanne Collins' Hunger Games books, they're my favourites, hence my mockingjay necklace. I almost hope that my parents don't call me for breakfast, so that I don't have to eat, or pretend to eat. On days when I'm feeling especially fat, I won't eat at all, I'll just cut my food into really tiny pieces so it looks like I'm eating but really I won't eat anything. Whatever I do eat usually comes straight back up less than five minutes after breakfast anyway. Alas, I'm out of luck and my dad calls me down to eat exactly when he said he would.

I walk downstairs, taking my seat at the table between Rose and my dad. Ginny isn't here yet, which is surprising because she's usually here. "I'm sorry if I upset you last night Shannon" my mom says.

"It's okay" I mutter softly. I feel worse about yelling at her, I'm sure.

"I do think that therapy might help you, but if you don't want it, then I promise I'll stop bugging you about it" she says.

"Thank you" I say, although I'll believe that when I see it, Mom's been bugging me about going to therapy for years. She places a plate of waffles in front of me, waffles with a huge amount of whipped cream on top of them, and strawberries. Before I started watching every single calorie I ate, I would have loved a meal like this. Now, it just looks like one giant lump of fat staring at me, daring me to eat it. It's probably my overactive imagination but to me it looks like the fat is dancing around on the plate, taunting me. I'm desperately hungry, I'm always desperately hungry, the only thing on my mind is food, but I can't. I know the calories of every single item on that plate. I carefully pick off the strawberries, and eat those, before slicing my waffle into tiny thin pieces, and moving it around on my plate. If I see my mother, or father looking at me, I will shove a piece of waffle in my mouth and then spit it out as soon as they look away. Rose keeps talking enough to hold their attention, and me I just stare into space.

Once Ginny comes downstairs, everyone's attention is on her, and so I can simply just not touch my food and no one notices. I excuse myself, and make my way upstairs. I can't help myself, I feel so guilty about eating even those few strawberries, that I make myself sick again. I make my way back to my room, and settle down on my bed, starting to draw furiously. Ginny comes in, and starts questioning me about why I left breakfast so abruptly but I simply avoid the question and tell her I don't want to talk. Unlike with Mom, with Ginny that excuse actually works, and she simply goes to get her notebook and sits there writing as I draw. I draw what I see when I look in the mirror, the fat girl that is reflected back at me.

I finish the drawing just before Mom calls us for school. I head out, whilst Ginny hangs back, saying she needs to get her bag. I'm not sure if I believe her, but I walk downstairs anyway. Ginny cycles to school, so she'll be making her own way there, whereas Mom drives me and Rose, so I can't stick around to check if she's snooping or not, as I really have to go, or I'll be late.

Rose chats mum's ear off on the car ride to school, which works well for me because it means that I don't have to talk at all, I just work on one of my comic strips for comic club until Mom's car pulls into the parking lot at school. Rose and I both say goodbye to Mom, before jumping out of the car. As soon as Rose spots her friends, she runs over to them without even turning to talk to me first. Not that I care, Rose and I aren't really that close. As I always do, I head for the school library, my favourite place in the entire building. I can do all my favourite things there, read, draw, even do a little programming on the computers sometimes and I don't have to talk to anyone, it's perfect. I go over to the bookshelves and scan them for a book that I think looks interesting and take a seat in one of the comfortable chairs in the corner of the library and start to immerse myself in the book. I jump when I feel a tap on my shoulder, as I had not heard anyone coming up behind me.

"Interesting book?" the girl asks. She's not a girl that I've seen before, she must either be a transfer or a freshman, although it wouldn't surprise me if she was older, I keep myself out of most of the social parts of school life, so I honestly don't know a lot of people at this school.

"Yeah it's great. Sorry, you are?" I ask, a little confused.

"Your new girlfriend?" she asks raising her eyebrows and smirking in a way that shows me she's joking. She actually makes me laugh, quite a feat considering I haven't really properly laughed in years.

"I meant your name" I say.

"Oh, it's Samantha Reynolds, but no one ever calls me Samantha, only my mother when she's really angry with me, so you can call me Sammy" the girl says.

"Nice to meet you Sammy, my name's Shannon Puckerman" I say, holding out my hand for her to shake. She shakes it vigorously, and again I can't help but smile at her enthusiasm, it's very endearing. I hadn't noticed until now just how cute she is, she has these cute tight blonde ringlets, her heart shaped face, silvery-grey eyes and pale, freckled skin. Her fringe falls just over her left eye, and she has a cute little beauty mark on the left side of her mouth.

"You're staring" she remarks, smiling teasingly.

"You're…..very….uh pretty" I stammer, feeling my face turn bright red.

"Thank you, so are you" she says, although a lot more easily than I managed. I wish I could be that confident. I also wish I knew whether she meant that in a purely friendly sense, or if she meant it as in a she likes me and thinks I'm cute kind of a way.

"What was that book you were reading anyway?" she asks.

"Inkheart by Cornelia Funke" I say.

"The one with the girl who can read characters out of a book? That's a good one" she says.

"You've read it?" I ask.

"I've read all of them actually, I love reading. My mom says that my first word was 'book'" she says, laughing.

"Don't tell me what happens" I say.

"I won't, I would never deprive you of the joy of finding out for yourself" she says.

"So are you are transfer? I just haven't seen you around before?" I ask.

"No, I've been going her since last year, I'm a sophomore" she says.

"You don't sound like you're from Ohio though" I say.

"That's because I'm not, I'm from Maryland. Baltimore" she says.

"What brought you out here then?" I ask.

"My sister got a new job in Columbus, so she moved us all out here" she says.

"All? How many of you are there?" I ask, intrigued.

"Six, I have five siblings" she says.

"Wow big family" I note.

"Yeah, my parents weren't very good on the whole birth control thing" she says, laughing, but there's a slight hint of resentment underneath it.

"Wait you said earlier that your mom calls you Sammy when she's angry, but just now you said that your sister moved you out here, so you must live with her. Where are your mom and dad?" I ask.

"This week? I think they're in Costa Rica, but it could be Portugal? I'm not entirely sure, I lose track" she says. "As for your second point, I did live with my sister, but I don't anymore, I have my own apartment" she says.

"So your parents travel?" I ask.

"They're journalists; they travel all over the world for work. They're at home maybe 2 weeks out of the entire year? It's been like that ever since my sister was little, as soon as they got jobs after college. They would go out on assignment to some far off country, come home for two weeks, Mom would get pregnant, they'd go back out, travel for as long as they could and then Mom would have the baby, whichever one of us it was. Then they'd come home, pawn us off on Grandma, and then go out again. My grandma basically raised my four older siblings. After Grandma died, we would shuffle from friends house to friends house until my eldest sister was old enough that she would look after all of us" she says.

"So you and your parents aren't close then?" I ask.

"Hardly, I barely know them, they've been gone most of my life and that's not an exaggeration. We get the odd phone call, a letter and email or two, but that's about it" she says.

"So how come you live on your own and how do you afford it?" I ask. I'm probably being too nosy towards a girl I only just met, but she really intrigues me. I should ask whether she likes girls, I know I should, but it doesn't seem like the right time. I'm pretty sure she was flirting with me earlier but I can't be sure.

"It's a long story" she says.

"I've got time. If you want to tell me that is, I don't want to force you" I say.

"No it's okay, you'd probably find out soon enough anyway. I went to a party my freshman year, and this guy slipped something in my drink when I wasn't looking. I went completely out of it, and when I woke up I was on someone's bed, naked and had no idea what had happened to me. I found out I was pregnant about a month later. I was too scared to get an abortion and you need the father's consent to get an adoption, and I didn't even know for sure who he was really, I had my suspicions but I never actually saw him spike my drink so that wasn't really possible. So I kept my daughter, and moved into a one bed apartment, which I can just about afford on my savings and my part time job as a waitress" she says.

"Why didn't you just stay at home? It would have been easier?" I ask.

"Easier in that I'd have a lot of help, but you've got to remember that there were six of us in that house, so it was kind of crowded and a little overwhelming when I had just had my daughter" she says.

"What's her name?" I ask.

"Liberty Rose Reynolds, but I call her Libby" she says.

"That's so pretty" I say.

"You want to see a picture?" she asks. I nod, and she takes her phone out of her pocket, bringing up a photo of her with a cute toddler sitting on her lap, she looks very much like Sammy, the same blonde ringlets, the same silvery-grey eyes. "She's a cutie" I comment.

"Yeah, she's great when she's not screaming at two o'clock in the morning to be fed, or have her diaper changed, or just because she thinks that Mommy is having too much sleep and we couldn't have that" she says, laughing good naturedly.

"I'd say I understand, but my sisters are the same age as me so I've never really experienced the whole baby thing" I say.

"The only experience I had before I had Libby was babysitting my little sister, but when you have a baby of your own, you kind of have to learn fast!" she says.

"So what about the rest of your family?" I ask.

"My family's house is called the madhouse because there's so many of us, and at holidays it's even worse, we have a lot of extended family, plus friends, so put it this way, the house is never empty. I have two older sisters and an older brother, and a younger sister and a younger brother" she says.

"So you're the middle child?" I ask.

"Yeah, which is why most people say I got pregnant at 14, you know classic middle child syndrome, wanting mom and dad's attention because they pay more attention to the older and younger siblings than you which is obviously completely ridiculous, but anything so that people don't have to admit that date rape is still a problem" she says.

"People can be such idiots" I say.

"Tell me about it, I get so freakin' sick of everyone staring at me when I'm out with Libby like I'm some slut and chose to have a kid at fourteen. Anyway, I won't talk about that because it just makes me angry, you were asking about my siblings. My eldest sister is 25, her name is Marie, she's the head chef at this fancy restaurant in Columbus. Her cooking is so good, which is one of the reasons why I go over to my family's house for dinner every night, aside from the fact that I can't really afford food, since most of my money goes on rent. Then there's my older brother Leon, he's 23, he's at law school at OSU, he's at school most of the time and when he's at home, he's studying so we don't really see him that much. My other older sister Violet is 21; she's at the University of Cincinnati, studying medicine. She's a walking, talking trivia encyclopaedia, and she's smart as a whip, you can't get anything past her. My younger brother Rowan is 12, we're like best friends, I think if it's possible he reads more than I do, and my younger sister Mia is 6, she spends most of her time doing ballet" she says.

"I'd love to meet them, I mean only if you'd like me to, of course" I say. Her family sounds like a lot of fun, and I feel a little envious. I love my family, but Sammy sounds like she has real comraderie with her family that I just don't have. I love my dad and Ginny and I are sort of close, but I've never been able to bond with my mom and Rose in the same way so our family isn't quite as connected as it sounds like hers is.

"Sure, how about you come over to my house, say next Friday? Violet and Leon come home on Fridays so we have a weekly family Friday night dinner, and then you'll get to meet them too. It's not a Reynolds family experience if the whole of the Reynolds family isn't there. You can even meet Libby if you want to" she says.

"I'd love that" I say smiling. I'm too nervous to ask if this counts as a date. I guess it doesn't because it's with her family, but I kind of hope it does. I find her really cute, oh my gosh, can she tell how cute I find her? Am I being too obvious? Should I just ask her out already? I can't do that though, no one knows I'm gay. If I'm seen out with her then people will start talking and I don't want that. I have survived at this school by remaining invisible and if people find out then I won't be anymore. Stop it Shannon, you're being ridiculous, you don't even know if she's gay. Should I ask her? I should ask her. No I shouldn't. Yes I should. Oh come on Shannon you really want to know, I tell myself.

"Are you gay?" I blurt out, immediately covering my mouth and feeling my cheeks turn red. I can't believe I actually asked. What if she isn't? I'm going to feel so crappy if she's actually straight, although I swear she's been flirting with me, so if she's not a lesbian, I'm pretty sure she must be at least bisexual.

Luckily for me, she lets out a good-natured laugh. "What gave me away? she asks.

"Just a feeling" I shrug.

"I won't tell anyone that you are if you don't want me to" she says.

"How did you know?" I retort.

"The fact that you turned all red when you asked me if I was, was a pretty big clue. You also seem really interested in finding out about me, you told me I was pretty and you can't stop staring at me" she says.

"Am I that obvious?" I ask.

"Kind of" she says, laughing a little. "So I've told you all about my family, why don't you tell me about yours?" she says.

"Mine really isn't that interesting. My dad coaches the Cleveland Browns and my mom is the drama teacher here, she starting up glee club again too" I say.

"Is your mom Mrs Puckerman?" she asks.

"Yeah that's her" I say.

"I love her, she's one of my favourite teachers" she says.

"That's Mom, everybody loves her" I say, trying not to sound bitter because Mom is everything I'm not, and everything I wish I could be.

"Do you have siblings?" she asks.

"Two, Rose and Ginny, they're twins. Ginny and I are quite close, but me and Rose not so much, she's very…well she's a character. You'd understand if you met her. They're both 16 too" I say.

"How can you and your siblings all be 16? You're not triplets are you?" she asks.

"No, I'm adopted, Mom and Dad adopted me when I was four" I say.

"How come? Oh shit, I shouldn't have asked that, I'm really sorry, you've only just met me and here I am asking you about something really personal. I'm sorry, I get total foot-in-mouth disease sometimes" she says.

"It's fine, I don't mind you asking, but I don't want to talk about it. Not until I know you better" I say.

"I completely understand" she replies. "So this Glee Club your mom is starting, what is it?" she asks.

"It's a singing and dancing group basically, we compete in competitions against the best show choirs in the country, at least if you get to Nationals" I say. "Do you sing?" I ask.

"A little, but I don't really have time to join any clubs, what with my waitressing job and Libby" she says.

"I just wanted to know" I ask, trying not to grin hugely. Not only is she cute, she loves to read and she sings as well. This day could not be going better considering that it started off so horribly. Of course, just then the buzzer goes so we have to head off to class. I don't think I've ever been so annoyed that a conversation was over.

"What do you have?" I ask her.

"English, you?" she asks.

"Honours Biology" I say, sighing because this means that we can't walk to class together. She takes a notebook out of her bag, tears off a piece of paper and hands it to me.

"Call me" she says, winking before tossing her blonde curls over her shoulder and walking away. I'm pretty sure she knows I'm watching her as she walks away, because there's a little swing in her hips. I swear I can't stop smiling for the entire morning, even during lessons that I hate, because I'm thinking about her cute smile, and her silvery grey eyes, that are so beautiful, I could just fall into them. It means all my teachers call me out for being distracted in class, but I don't care.

I'm still feeling elated when I head for my Glee audition, which maybe isn't the best mood to be in for the song I'm going to sing, as it's a very emotional song, but it always makes me think of my birth mother, so I probably have the emotion side of this covered, as thinking about my mother always reminds me of how much I hate myself. Somehow, thinking about Sammy has made me forget that, if only for a little while but it's going to take a hell of a lot more than one beautiful girl to make me forget all the bad things I feel about myself.

"Hi Mom, Aunt Rachel" I say as I walk onto the stage.

"You look awfully happy, what happened?" Mom asks.

"She looks like she met someone, who are they?" Aunt Rachel asks. I appreciate that she didn't automatically say he, and assume the person that I have a crush on is a guy, but I'm not exactly going to announce to my mom on stage during my glee audition that I'm a lesbian. It's not the right time.

"I don't want to say" I say, shyly.

"I'm sure she'll tell me later" Mom says to Aunt Rachel. I don't say anything to that. I won't tell her later, and if I was going to tell anyone about my sexuality then it would be my dad, not my mom.

"Can I just sing?" I ask, not wanting to talk about my love life.

"Sure sweetheart, what are you going to sing?" Aunt Rachel asks.

"Bring Me To Life by Evanescence" I say.

"That's a beautiful song, let's hear it" she says.

I walk over to the piano and nod to the piano player to signal that she can go. I take her seat behind the piano, and start to play. As I sing, memories flash through my mind, some that I didn't even know I had, of all the times that my birth mother abused me.

Shannon:

How can you see into my eyes like open doors?

Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb

Without a soul my spirit's sleeping somewhere cold

Until you find it there and lead it back home

(Wake me up)

Wake me up inside

(Can't wake up)

Wake me up inside

(Save me)

Call my name and save me from the dark

(Wake me up)

Bid my blood to run

(I can't wake up)

Before I come undone

(Save me)

Save me from the nothing I've become

Now that I know what I'm without

You can't just leave me

Breathe into me and make me real

Bring me to life

(Wake me up)

Wake me up inside

(I can't wake up)

Wake me up inside

(Save me)

Call my name and save me from the dark

(Wake me up)

Bid my blood to run

(I can't wake up)

Before I come undone

(Save me)

Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life

(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)

Bring me to life

Frozen inside without your touch

Without your love darling

Only you are the life among the dead

All this time I can't believe I couldn't see

Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me

I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems

Got to open my eyes to everything

Without a voice, without a thought, without a soul

Don't let me die here

There must be something more

Bring me to life

(Wake me up)

Wake me up inside

(I can't wake up)

Wake me up inside

(Save me)

Call my name and save me from the dark

(Wake me up)

Bid my blood to run

(I can't wake up)

Before I come undone

(Save me)

Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life

(I've been living a lie, there's nothing left inside)

Bring me to life

I have to wipe the tears from my eyes at the end of the song, so that my mom won't see me crying and worry about me. She's constantly worried about me, and whilst she might not be wrong in doing so, it's kind of irritating.

"What did you think?" I ask.

"Your voice may not be as strong as Amy Lee's but wow you definitely poured the emotion into that song, we could use someone like that" Aunt Rachel says.

"You're in Shannon, we'll see you at rehearsal on Friday, in the choir room at four" Mom says.

"Thanks" I say, rushing out of the auditorium before either of them can say anything else. All I can hear is my birth mother's words in my head, "you worthless little rat", "you ungrateful little toad", "you little whimp", "cowardly, good for nothing child" and countless other things to that effect, that made me feel awful, because I'm such a horrible person that my own mother couldn't love me. My birth mother wished I was dead, and I shouldn't care, because I know she was a terrible human being, but still, it's hard not to feel worthless when your own mother hated you. I shake my head, trying to stop the memories from overwhelming me, but I can't. So I do the only thing that I can do to stop pain. I reach into my bag and pull out the first aid kit I carry, which contains my razor blade and bandages. I unwrap the bandages from my left arm, and start to draw the razor across my skin. With each cut, it feels like the memories of my birth mother float away, and the only thing I can focus on is the physical pain of the cuts. I wrap each cut carefully with new bandages and then pull down my sleeves, so no one can see them. Finally I allow myself to cry, throwing myself to the bathroom floor, in fury and in sadness for my mother who is out of my life and yet somehow still manages to define it, even twelve years later.

Brant's POV

Flashback

"Come on guys, if we don't leave now we're never going to make it up to the mountains in time" I call from the cab of the car. To celebrate Christmas, we're driving up to my family's cabin in the Appalachians, and it's about a five hour drive away, so we need to head off if we're going to make it there before dark. It took me forever to convince my moms to let me go, and they only agreed in the end because Mara is 18, and therefore it wouldn't be me, Kelli, Seth, and Skip (her real name is Caroline, but she hates the name and thinks it sounds too old fashioned, and so she was nicknamed Skip because she was very bouncy and excitable, and the nickname stuck) who are all 15, along with me.

"Chill out Brant, we'll make it in plenty of time" Kelli says, throwing yet another bag into the back of Mami's truck. We're only going away for a week, but you would think by the amount of luggage that the girls have brought that we're going away for a year.

"Are you done yet?" I ask; we've been loading the back of the truck for about an hour.

"We've just got two more bags to get and then yes, we're done" Skip adds.

"Do you really need all those bags? Seth and I only have one bag each" I say.

"Yes but you're boys. Girls need shoes and clothes for all possible weathers" Kelli says.

"What possible weathers? It's winter, there's one weather, cold" I say.

"No, there's rainy, snowy, cold, light breeze or mild" she says.

"See this is why I don't get girls" I say, laughing a little although it worries me that I've never got girls. I like them, but I don't feel the way I know I'm supposed to about them. I keep telling myself that I just haven't met the right girl yet, but I'm pretty sure that's not true. I find guys attractive, and I know I do, but I keep denying it because I'm too scared to admit what it means. I don't want to be rejected by everyone. Well I know I won't be rejected by my moms, but I don't want to be rejected by everyone else.

"What are you thinking about?" Seth asks, punching me in the shoulder.

I shake my head, bringing myself back to the present. "Nothing, just sick of waiting for the girls" I say, lying.

"Yeah, I know, they always take forever" he says. Just then Skip, Kelli and Mara come out of the house, carrying a bag each.

"I thought you said there were only two bags left?" I ask.

"Yeah I guess we forgot about one. Can you take this? It's really heavy" Kelli says, handing me the bag she's carrying. I haul it into the back of the truck and then take the bags from Skip and Mara too, gesturing for them all to get into the truck whilst I finish up loading.

A few minutes later we are finally out of the driveway and on our way to the cabin. We have the radio on up loud the whole way there, singing along at the tops of our voices, and chatting about our plans for our week at the cabin, mostly eating and drinking seeing as it's Christmas, but we also want to enjoy the mountains, so we've planned to go hiking, and rollerblading, weather permitting.

We arrive at the cabin just as the sun is going down, and it takes us a while to unpack the car given how much stuff the girls have brought. It's really cold in the cabin, so I light the fire and we all gather round.

"What should we do first?" I ask.

"I think we should play truth or dare" Skip suggests, and everyone cheers. Truth or dare is kind of a staple of our sleepovers, we always play it, although usually it's after we've started drinking, because we're more honest once we've had a few. Kelli grabs a bottle and places it on the floor before spinning it. It lands on Skip.

"Truth or dare Skip?" Kelli asks.

"You know me, I always like a good dare" she says, winking.

"I dare you to eat this marshmallow out of my bellybutton" she says, holding up a mini marshmallow.

"You're on" she replies. Kelli lies down on the floor and places the marshmallow in her belly button. It's kind of gross to watch, since she wedges that thing right in there, but eventually Skip gets the marshmallow out.

"Your turn to spin Skip" Kelli says. Skip spins the bottle and it lands on Mara.

"Truth or dare Mara?" Kelli asks.

"Truth please" Mara says.

"So boring but I'll bite. If you had to date anyone in this room, here now, who would you date?" she asks.

"Skip" she says, smiling.

"You can't choose your girlfriend, that's cheating" Kelli says. Okay so maybe Mara and Skip would be okay with me being gay, but I highly doubt that Kelli and Seth would be.

"I don't care, she's the hottest one in this room" Mara says, leaning into kiss Skip. First it's just a quick peck, but then they start full on making out.

"Get a room" Kelli says, making fake sick noises.

"Please don't, your room is next to mine remember that" I say only half joking. I'm still scarred for life from that one time I walked in on them. Mara and Skip laugh good naturedly before pulling apart.

"Your turn to spin honey" Skip says, stroking her shoulder. Mara spins the bottle and it lands on me.

"Truth or dare Bran?" Mara asks me.

I like a risk, so without thinking, I immediately go "Dare".

"I dare you to kiss Seth" Mara says, smiling gleefully. Does she know?

I look at Seth, and he shrugs his shoulders, giving me a look that says "I'm game if you are".

Hesitantly, I lean over toward Seth and gently place a peck on his lips before pulling away again. "That wasn't a proper kiss!" Mara complains.

"Yeah do it again, with tongue this time" Skip says.

Seth and I look nervously at each other and Seth shrugs, shooting me another look that says "Make it fast". Our lips meet again, for longer this time. It's amazing, like nothing I've ever felt before. Seth pulls away after a few seconds although I wish it could continue.

"Wow that was some kiss. Have you been hiding something Brant?" Kelli asks.

"No!" I exclaim although I realise afterwards that I shouldn't have been so indignant. It just looks more suspicious.

"Leave him alone guys, he doesn't have to tell us anything he doesn't want to" Mara says and I share a grateful look with her. "

"How about we get some drinks?" Skip says, changing the subject so some of the pressure is taken off me. She goes to the fridge and takes out a couple of beers, handing them round. She pops the tops off everyone's.

"Merry Christmas everyone" she says and we echo this sentiment, clinking beer bottles.

It all escalates from there and several rounds of beer later, when all of us are decidedly drunk, we start to slur along to songs on my IPod.

Kelli:

Singing radiohead at the top of our lungs

With the boom box blaring as we're falling in love

Got a bottle of whatever, but it's getting us drunk

Singing here's to never growing up

Skip:

Call up all our friends, go hard this weekend

For no damn reason, I don't think we'll ever change

Meet you at the spot, half past ten o'clock

We don't ever stop, and we're never gonna change

Mara:

Say, won't you stay forever, stay

If you stay forever hey

We can stay forever young

All:

Singing radiohead at the top of our lungs

With the boom box blaring as we're falling in love

Got a bottle of whatever, but it's getting us drunk

Singing, here's to never growing up

Seth:

We'll be running down the street yelling "Kiss my ass!" (He pulls down his trousers, mooning everyone before Skip tugs them back up because no one wants to see that!)

I'm like yeah whatever, we're still living like that

When the sun's going down, we'll be raising our cups

Singing, here's to never growing up

All:

Oh whoa, oh whoa, here's to never growing up

Oh whoa, oh whoa, here's to never growing up

Brant:

We live like rock stars, dance on every bar

This is who we are, I don't think we'll ever change (hell no!)

They say just grow up, but they don't know us

We don't give a fuck, and we're never gonna change

Mara:

Say, won't you stay forever stay

If you stay forever hey

We can stay forever young

All:

Singing Radiohead at the top of our lungs

With the boom box blaring as we're falling in love

Got a bottle of whatever, but it's getting us drunk

Singing, here's to never growing up

Seth:

We'll be running down the street, yelling "Kiss my ass!" (At least he doesn't pull his pants down this time)

I'm like yeah whatever, we're still living like that

The sun's going down; we'll be raising our cups

Singing, here's to never growing up

All:

Oh whoa, oh whoa, here's to never growing up

Oh whoa, oh whoa, (yeah raise your glass and say) here's to never growing up

Oh whoa, oh whoa (da de da de da) here's to never growing up (no we're never growing up)

Oh whoa, oh whoa, here's to never growing up

Once we finish singing we fall to the floor giggling, and then we continue singing along to my IPod until the five of us pass out by the fire.

I am awoken by a wind battering against the cabin in the middle of the night. The others are all still asleep, but I've always been a light sleeper. I hear a banging against the door, which doesn't sound like the wind. It sounds like someone bashing in the door. I shake Kelli awake.

"What?" she asks grumpily.

"Did you hear that?" I ask.

"What?" she asks.

"The banging" I say.

"It's just the wind, go back to sleep" she mumbles.

"No, it sounded like someone trying to get in" I say.

"You're just being paranoid" she says. After she says that, another loud bang echoes on the door.

"You heard that right?" I ask.

"Still just the wind, Bran" she replies. The next bang brings the door falling inwards and Kelli and I both scream. We see a silhouette in the doorway, a dark shadow, of what looks like a man but we cannot be sure.

"What the hell you guys?" Skip asks waking up at the sound of our screams.

"Look up" I say, gesturing towards the door.

"We have an intruder" Kelli says. The figure walks towards us and the three of us back up toward the wall. It's only when he steps into the light of the fire that we can finally see his face.

"Mason?" Kelli asks.

"Who's Mason?" I ask.

"Mara's ex-boyfriend" the man says. He's a tall intimidating kind of guy, with close cropped dark hair and large muscles. He has a beard that looks like it has seen better days, and piercing grey eyes.

"But Mara's gay?" I ask.

"She didn't know that, so she made a complete and utter fool out of me, before deciding to dump me for a girl. So I've come here to get my revenge" Mason says, smiling creepily.

"I'm sure she's really sorry about that, so why don't you just make up and leave us alone?" I ask, hopefully.

No such luck. His grey eyes turn thunderous, and he grabs Skip from the spot where she's sitting, holding her by the collar of her shirt. She kicks her legs out, trying to hit him so that he'll drop her.

"Stop wriggling" Mason growls.

"Not a chance in hell" she says, trying to aim her kicks at his balls.

"So where did we get on the whole leaving thing?" I ask.

"I'm not leaving until I've got my revenge. That starts with the bitch who stole my girlfriend" he says. He reaches into his pocket, and as he brings it up, lightning strikes outside the cabin, illuminating the knife that he has pulled out.

Kelli and I scream once again, waking up Mara and Seth.

"It's just a little lightning guys, you don't need to scream so loud" Mara says.

"In case you haven't noticed Mara, your psycho ex-boyfriend is here, and he's attempting to kill your girlfriend" I say. She turns to see Mason who is holding a knife to Skip's throat.

"Put her down you bastard!" she screams.

"Okay" he says shrugging. He draws the knife across Skip's throat, and she falls to the floor, dead before she can even scream. Mara screams, loud enough to shake the cabin. She tackles Mason, trying to bring him down but he's too strong for her.

"You said to put her down" he says, flashing a creepy smile at her.

"That wasn't what I meant!" she says, throwing a punch at his nose. The crack as it breaks echoes around the cabin.

"You deserve it! You broke my heart, so I broke yours, and now I'm going to break you. Bitches like you deserve to die. Join your precious Skip, you bitches deserve each other" he says. He grabs her by the neck and starts to squeeze. She tries to scream, but she can't his hold is too tight. Kelli, Seth and I huddled by the fire, worried that Mason is going to come after us next. We all watch in horror as Mason squeezes Mara's next tighter and tighter, until eventually she drops to the floor like a rag doll, landing next to Skip in the blood that is pooling from the wound in Skip's neck.
"Who's next?" Mason asks, his eyes sparkling. He almost seems to be enjoying this, but I guess that's the kind of sick guy he is.

"You got what you wanted. Mara and Skip are dead, so leave us alone. NOW" I say, standing up and facing him. I stare right into his eyes, trying to show that I'm not scared of him.

"I don't think so. There's nothing to stop the three of you from telling the police what I've done. So I have to kill all of you. I think I'll leave you for last so you have to watch your friends die" he says, pushing me back down. He grabs Kelli from where she's sitting beside me. Seth grabs a poker from the fire and creeps up behind Mason, trying to knock him out with it, but Mason notices and kicks him in the balls, sending him sprawling to the floor.

"Put her down, and I don't mean kill her" I say, glaring at him.

"Not a chance" he says. I grab for the hand holding his knife, and twist it, so hard that I break his wrist but he doesn't let go of Kelli or the knife. He simply switches hands and rams the knife into her stomach before I can stop him. He grabs me and ties me up with a length of rope from his pocket. "Now you can't stop me from killing your other friend" he says. He's right, but he can't stop me from screaming. I yell for help, over and over. I watch with wide eyes as he plunges his knife into Seth's stomach, but I never stop screaming.

"SHUT UP!" Mason yells, clamping his hand over my mouth. He holds his knife to my throat and I immediately stop screaming. But I'm not going to let it end like this. I refuse to let my friends have died for nothing. I scan the room to see if there is anything I can use to untie my hands. The only problem is that Mason still has his knife to my throat. I kick out with my legs and send him sprawling to the floor. I spot a pair of nail clippers that Skip left lying around earlier and shuffle towards them my hand closing around them. Mason gets back up quickly and soon his knife is against my throat again. I feel it dig in slightly deeper, and work quickly, clipping strands of rope. The knife draws a spot of blood, and I increase the pace, eventually managing to get myself out. As soon as I do, I don't even take a moment to look back at my dead friends, I just run.

I hear Mason's footsteps following mine, but I keep focused on the path ahead, through the forest, aiming to get to the nearest town and tell the police about Mason. I run for what seems like forever and eventually I take a moment to stop, thinking I've got rid of Mason. But when I turn around he is standing right behind me.

"You really thought you could get away from me? Stupid kid" he says. I step away from him, preparing to run again, but he grabs me by the collar, and pulls out his knife. I close my eyes, not wanting to see the moment the knife goes into me. Instead, I feel the knife cut across my left cheek and am slightly confused as to why he hasn't killed me. I shouldn't have been under any illusions, as soon as I open my eyes; he pulls me into a chokehold.

"I'm really going to enjoy this" he says, closing his hands around my neck. Just when I feel like I'm about to pass out, I hear a loud crash from behind me, and my neck is suddenly free. I turn around, seeing a young man, leaning against a snowmobile.

"Thank you. Who are you?" I ask.

"Eric, I'm a search and rescue scout. I heard screams from the cabin and thought I'd come to investigate but by the time I got there, I spotted you running through the woods with that guy chasing after you, so I followed you to make sure you were okay. We should get you to a hospital, that cut is going to need stitches" he says.

"We need to call the police, my friends in that cabin are all dead" I say, barely able to say it, let alone believe it.

"Let's take care of you first, then we'll go to the police" he says.

"But what about him? He's going to get away" I say.

"He'll be out for a while yet, I'm sure the police will find him. Hop on" he says. I jump on the back of his snowmobile and he starts to drive away. Out of the corner of my eye, as we're leaving, I spot Mason getting up and taking a running leap into the sea.

I should be thrilled. This is all over and Mason is dead. But what if he isn't? What if he never leaves me alone?

End of flashback

I wake up sweaty and screaming. I have this nightmare in various incarnations every night. Sometimes it's just individual deaths, Mara's, Skip's, Kelli's or Seth's; sometimes it's more than one. Sometimes it's Mason cutting my face, or him jumping off the cliff. It's rare that I have the nightmare the whole way through, the entirety of that day, but it does happen. Those are the worst. It's been almost a year since they died, they died the Christmas of my sophomore year, but I still miss them. I feel like it's my fault, I should have done more to save them, and that's why I have these dreams. A knock at my door breaks my out of my reverie.

"Come in" I call. Lexi walks into my room.

"I heard you screaming, are you okay?" she asks.

"I'm fine, I just had the nightmare again" I say.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asks.

"No" I reply sharply. I never talk about Mara, Skip, Kelli or Seth. It's too hard, and too horrible to talk about them. All it does is remind me that they're gone and how they died. Sure I have lots of wonderful memories of them, but they're all overshadowed by that night in the cabin. "What did you want to talk to me about?" I ask.

"How did you know I wanted to talk to you about something?" she asks.

"Because I have nightmares every night and barely ever have you come to check on me" I say.

"Okay you got me. I wasn't going to talk to anyone about this but I can't sleep thinking about it, so I need to tell someone" she says.

"I'm listening" I say. Lexi and I may not be biological siblings (none of us are) but we're as close as, me, Morgan and her.

"Okay so I overheard Mami talking on the phone yesterday and she's been lying to me, they both have. They do know who my dad is and they haven't told me. For 16 years they've lied to me!" she says.

"Who is he?" I ask.

"Well not only do they know who he is, I know who he is, and so do you. I've known him all this time, but never known that he was my dad" she says.

"So who is he?" I ask.

"It's Uncle Kurt, Uncle Kurt is my dad" she says.

"Are you serious?" I ask, slightly disbelievingly.

"I overheard Mami! She said and I quote 'I don't want to keep you from your daughter Kurt'".

"Is this so terrible? You know Uncle Kurt, you like Uncle Kurt, at least you won't be starting a relationship with someone you don't know, he's always been in your life" I say.

"I know, but I don't want our relationship to change" she says.

"It might change for the better" I say.

"Or it could be totally awkward and never the same again" she says.

"I doubt that will happen, Lexi" I say.

"I'm not mad that Uncle Kurt is my dad, I'm angry that he, Mami and Mom, knew all this time and they never told me" she says. "Plus it's going to be so weird seeing him and Abby, Sierra and Freya now. What am I supposed to do? Pretend like I don't know that we're related?" she asks.

"Maybe you need to talk to him about it" I say.

"Maybe. I can't believe Mami and Mom kept it from me!" she says indignantly.

"They just wanted you to be their daughter, and not see Mom as more your Mom than Mami" I say.

"But I would never have done that. If they'd told me that Uncle Kurt was my dad then they'd still be my moms, I'd just have been able to have a dad too" she says.

"I think the three of you need to talk, maybe you'll understand better when you talk to them" I say.

"I don't think I'll ever understand. Imagine if it was your dad, and you realised you'd known him your entire life, and they hadn't told you that he was your dad, would you understand?" she asks.

"I suppose not, but you should at least hear them out. They have been there for you for the past sixteen years after all. And as for Kurt, there's no reason why you can't have a father-daughter relationship, if that's what you want. Mami and Mom can't stop you from having that kind of relationship with him, if that's what you want" I say.

"Thanks Bran; that was good advice" she says, giving me a hug. She turns to get up, but I pull her back.

"Will you stay with me please? I don't want to have another nightmare" I say. She nods, and climbs into the other side of the bed, wrapping her arms around me, and softly humming into my ear until we both fall asleep.

Lexi is already gone by the time I wake up, but that's no surprise, she's always an early riser. Me, I like a good lie in. I walk downstairs, and Mom, Mami and Morgan are all sitting around the kitchen table, but there is no sign of Lexi.

"Where's Lexi?" I ask.

"At the Lima Bean with her new boyfriend" Morgan says.

"Boyfriend?" I ask.

"Okay, well, he's not her boyfriend, but she has a crush on a guy from Dalton, someone called Kyle. She left well before six this morning" Morgan says.

I'm happy for Lexi, but I hope this one really does like her, she's kind of naïve and most of the boys that go out with her use that to their advantage. It goes like this, she falls for them, they use her, and then they dump her and leave her heartbroken, I kick their asses and she moves onto to the next loser. I hope this guy is different but I'm not holding my breath, my sister attracts losers like moths to a flame.

"What about you Brant? Anyone special?" Morgan asks.

"Nope, no one special" I say. It's true, although what I don't mention is that even if there was someone special, I couldn't go out with them because I'm gay and no one knows about that. "What about you Mo?" I ask.

"No one special, guys tend to not like the geeky girls in cinema club" she says.

"You're too good for half the guys in our school anyway Mo" I say.

"Yeah and if I was dating someone then you'd have to work overtime, between Lexi's losers and whatever guy I manage to attract" Mo says, laughing. It's true, I'm very protective of my sisters, even if Lexi is actually a couple of months older than I am, I act like the older brother to both of them.
"Well then all you need to do is not go out with a loser who's going to break your heart then I don't have to deal with it, right sis?" I say, teasingly punching her arm.

"Right bro" she says, punching me right back in the same teasing manner.

"Are you planning on joining Glee Club?" Mo asks me.

"Yeah, I think so, I told Hanna and Remy that I would" I say. "What about you?" I ask.

"I'd like to, yeah" she says. "Although I don't think any of my friends from Cinema Club will be joining"

"I'm sure you'll make friends in Glee, Morgan. We certainly did" Mom says kissing Mami.

"Eww, I love you guys but can you save the PDA for when you're alone?" Mo says, making gagging noises.

"You just wait until you have a boyfriend, or girlfriend, then we'll be the ones teasing you about all the PDA" Mom says ruffling Morgan's hair. I shouldn't be worried about what my mom's will think about me being gay; they'd be cool with it. It's not really them I'm worried about, it's everyone else. I don't want everyone to see me differently just because I like guys and I know they will. I've seen what happens to gay kids at our school, even now, when being gay is a pretty accepted thing in society. I guess there will always be some bigots somewhere, who think that who I am is wrong.

"So how's school going? Mo? Brant?" Mami asks.

"It's fine I guess, I'm still getting above C's in all my classes so I can keep being on the swim team. We've got a big meet coming up next week, so I'm focused on that right now" I say.

"School's fine, I'm hoping to make honour roll this year" Mo says.

"Well you weren't far off making it last year were you?" Mami asks.

"No, but I'm hoping I'll actually do it this year" I say.

"I have an early class this morning; can you drop me off at work on your way to school Brant?" Mami asks. Both Lexi and I have our driver's licenses but we only have one family car, and then Mom's second hand Mini, so we have to share Mami's car.

"Sure" I say. "Let me just go and get ready" I add. Unlike Mo, and my moms, I usually have breakfast in my pyjamas and then get changed afterward, so I head back upstairs to my room. I quickly pull on a blue t-shirt, a pair of jeans and my black converses, grab my bag from where I always leave it on my desk chair, and head back downstairs.

"Ready to go?" I ask. Mami and Mo nod, and we head out to Mami's truck, me getting in the driver's seat, Mami in the front passenger seat and Mo in the back. Mom leaves later than us because her rehearsals don't start until later. On the way to school we mostly talk about classes and our planned auditions for Glee Club. Mo happily talks about the films they're planning to watch in cinema club, and the books she's currently been reading. We also talk about Mami's dance classes, and Mom's show.

I drop Mami off at her dance studio first, before driving myself and Morgan to school.

"I can't wait until I turn 16, I really want to be able to drive" she says.

"Well you're learning to drive so it's not like you can't drive at all" I point out.

"I know but I'd like to be able to drive wherever I want like you can" she says.

"It is pretty awesome. It would be even better if I could have my own car, and not have to share with Mami all the time, but you can't always get what you want" I say.

"Maybe you should save up for one?" Mo suggests.

"Where would I get enough money to do that?" I ask.

"You could ask Mami if she needs help at the studio?" she suggests.

"I can't exactly teach little girls how to do ballet" she says.

"How about at the leisure centre? You could see if they need a swim coach assistant? That way you could make some money and it would look good on your application for a swimming scholarship for college" Mo suggests.

"You are a genius Mo! If I wasn't driving I would hug you right now" I say.

"No problem" she replies. A few minutes later we pull into the parking lot of McKinley. We share a hug and then Morgan heads off to find her friend Clara from cinema club, and I head to my Math class. When I get to the classroom, I take my seat next to Travis and we spend most of our time talking. The day seems to pass incredibly slowly, until finally the buzzer for the end of the day goes. I head over to the auditorium for my Glee audition.

"Hey Brant, nice to see you" Aunt Rachel says.

"Nice to see you too" I say.

"Any chance any of your other jock friends want to try out? Remy brought Hanna along yesterday, but Mike says that your friends Tami and Kendall are both pretty good dancers" Aunt Quinn asks.

"Yeah they're not interested, they think Glee Club is for losers" I say.

"Oh well, it was good that you came, maybe some of the swim team will be inspired to join when they see how good you are" Aunt Rachel says.

"Yeah, let's hear your song Brant" Aunt Quinn says.

I hand the sheet music to the piano player, and nod to her when I'm ready to start. Then I just sing, pouring as much emotion as I can into the song. It's not about dead friends, but I feel that the emotion I feel from my friends' murders really helps me with the song.

Brant:

I do what he says but I

end up falling off the edge

I don't know what to do, never seems

To end up being true

Seeps in underneath the door

Sinks in and stains the floor

I don't know what to feel takes so long

For these wounds to heal

Tell me it's not really real

Fallen through

Why did I fall for you

Fallen for

All the lies, alibis, that you said

Left me holding on by the last thread

Stop, stare and watch me burn

Someday it'll be your turn

Can't fool me, I can see all the things

that you don't want me to see

You threw my heart away

That's the price I paid

I know it's never fair, promised me

You'd always be there

But you never really cared

Fallen through

Why did I fall for you

Fallen for

All the lies, alibis, that you said

Left me holding on by the last thread

Fallen through

Why did I fall for you

Fallen for

All the lies, alibis, that you said

Left me holding on by the last thread

Fallen through

Why did I fall for you

Fallen for

All the lies, alibis, that you said

Left me holding on by the last thread

"Wow Brant, I've never seen you sing with that much emotion. Where did you get that from?" Aunt Quinn asks.

"I was just thinking about some old friends of mine" I say. It's the truth, just not the entire truth.

"Well it really worked, you sounded wonderful. You're in Brant; we'll see you at the rehearsal on Friday. 4 o'clock in the choir room" Aunt Quinn says.

"Thanks a lot" I say. I say goodbye to both Aunt Quinn and Aunt Rachel before heading over to the swimming pool. I love to swim, it helps me to clear my head, and I never feel freer than when I'm in the water. I go into the locker room and change into my swim trunks, before heading out to the pool. I dive in and start to swim up and down the length of the pool. I keep swimming for about an hour, before getting out of the pool.

I am walking toward the locker room, when I hear footsteps behind me. I turn and see a tall, blonde, muscular guy following me, in a pair of swim trunks. He has a rather fantastic six pack, I note, with pleasure.

"Can I help you?" I ask, rather rudely.

"I just wanted to say that I think you're a great swimmer" he says.

"Thank you and you are?" I ask.

"Jensen Scott, I'm on the swim team" he says.

"I'm on the swim team, how come I've never noticed you before?" I ask.

"Maybe you weren't looking hard enough" he says winking.

"Seriously though, are you a transfer?" I ask.

"No, I'm a senior and I've been here since my freshman year. I don't blame you for not knowing who I am though, it's not as if I interact much with juniors and there are a lot of guys on the swim team" he says.

"Still you'd think I'd remember someone as hot as you" I say.

"Well you do make a good point" he says, making me laugh.

"So did you ever notice me before?" I ask.

"I wouldn't have come over to you if I hadn't" he says.

"So did you just come to talk to me about my swimming?" I ask.

"Not exactly. I kind of noticed you at the end of last year, and I thought you were cute, but I was too nervous to ask you out. I spotted you swimming today, and I thought that if I didn't ask you out now, I never would" he says.

"Oh I don't know, I'm not exactly…..out" I say.

"We could just go out as friends….if you want. To a movie or something? And maybe see where it goes from there?" he asks.

"I'd like that. I'll text you my number?" I say.

"Great. See you around Brant" he says.

"See you around Jensen" I say.

I may not be out yet, but maybe being gay isn't so bad, especially when cute swimmer guys ask me out!

Sierra's POV
Flashback

I can hear the noise from my bedroom. I don't like it, it's too loud. Andre is having another one of his parties, like he seems to all the time. It's so hot in here, I can barely breathe. I get up from my bed, and walk out of my room, squeezing through the gaps in the crowd of the party to get outside, being little has its advantages, and no one notices a four year old. Once I'm outside the house, I take a deep breath, breathing in the cool clean air, and it's such a relief compared to the hot musty air inside the house. I walk down the street, careful not to go too far away from the house because Tasha always told me it's bad to go too far away from her and Andre. I could get hurt. I walk to the end of the street and am turning to walk back home when someone grabs me from behind. I scream, but he covers my mouth with his hand.

"Quiet" he yells in my ear, so loud that I have to cover my ears with my hands.

"Leave me alone" I murmur shakily, the words coming out all muffled because his hand is still covering my mouth.

"But I just want a little fun" he whispers in my ear. His breath smells familiar, like Andre's always does, but with a little something extra mixed in.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" I yell, but my cries are muffled by his hand. He pushes me down to the ground. I kick out with my legs trying to stop him but he's too strong for me, and he pins me by my wrists. I scream loudly, taking advantage of the fact that his hand is no longer covering my mouth.

"Shut up you little brat!" he says, but I refuse and keep on screaming. He reaches under my dress, into my underwear. I kick out and keep on screaming, but that doesn't stop him from touching me there. His fingers feel all hot and sweaty.

"GET OFF ME!" I yell, but he slides his fingers even further into me as I struggle against him, kicking with my legs, scratching with my nails, even biting him as a way of getting him off me, but he won't. He starts to kiss me as a way of getting me to stop screaming. I try to push him away, but he's too big. I bring my knee up, aiming between his legs and I hear him cry out, so I know I've hit my target.

"Well you're just a little bitch aren't you?" he says. I try to run away, but he chases after me, hobbling a little, but he manages to catch up and pin me down again.

"You thought you would get away from me? You would be wrong" he says.

"HELP ME!" I yell, as he sticks his fingers into me once more.

"I've pleased you, now I think it's time for you to please me" he says.

"HELP ME!" I scream louder. He pulls his pants down, and then forces me to touch him. I pull my hand away, screaming louder.

"Fine you won't play ball, I guess I'll just have to keep going" he says, pulling his pants back up. He keeps touching me, and I keep screaming, and kicking trying to fight him off. He pulls his pants down, and then pulls my dress off, then my underwear. I scream again, loud enough to wake the entire neighbourhood. He tries to force himself onto me, but I keep kicking and biting and scratching, anything to stop him.

"HELP ME!" I yell again. I keep yelling this over, and over, until finally I hear footsteps coming towards me.

"Oh my goodness" a woman's voice says. I feel her hands underneath my arms, pulling me away from the man. She helps me put my dress and underwear back on.

"Did he hurt you?" the kindly woman asks me. I nod, hands shaking, unable to speak because my throat is so sore from screaming. She takes her phone out calling 911.

"Do you want me to take you home sweetie?" she asks.

I shake my head; I don't want to go back to that house with all the noise and the smell, the horrible smell, like the evil man.

"Okay then, I'll take you back to my house, once they've taken the horrible man away" she says. She sits with me until the police come, and cart the creepy man away for good, and then she picks me up and takes me over to her house, where she makes me a big mug of hot chocolate.

Then she sits with me, and comforts me, whilst I cry all night long.

End of flashback

I wake up, screaming and searching my bedroom for him. But then I remember I'm not in my childhood bedroom anymore, that I'm safe in the room that's been mine for the past eleven years, and my dads are down the hall, and he's in jail, not in my room with me. I look at the time on my watch. It's 4am but I don't think I'm going to be getting back to sleep, so I go to my wardrobe and change into my ballet leotard. I put on my grey crop top, black leggings and a pair of trainers over the top. Then I take my dance bag out of my wardrobe, put in my ballet shoes, and then stuff my clothes for school in the bag, a grey knitted skater dress, a pair of black leggings, my timberland style heeled boots, my red snapback & my brown leather jacket. On my way out, I grab a towel from the airing cupboard and some shampoo and conditioner from the bathroom. I carefully walk downstairs, trying not to wake up Dad or Abby, Freya is most likely already gone to visit her mother's grave again. We'd offer to go with her, but she's very secretive about her mother and kind of sensitive about the whole subject, so we just don't talk about it, even though we all know where she sneaks off to.

I go into the kitchen and take an apple from the fridge, to eat on my way to the dance studio. I slip my trainers on, and then go to the garage to get my bike out.

It takes me about 15 minutes to cycle down to Uncle Mike's studio, and I unlock the door, using the spare key that Uncle Mike gave to me. I head to one of the practice rooms, and take my crop top and leggings off so I am just wearing my leotard. I slip my ballet shoes on and then for an hour I practice my classical ballet, one of the sections for my grade 8 exam. I like ballet well enough, but it's not my favourite type of dance, I don't feel like I can express myself as much in ballet as in contemporary. After I've practiced my ballet, I put my crop top and leggings back on, and place my IPod in the docking station, playing one of my favourite songs. I sang this the second night after I came home with Dad and Pops, and we really connected, so it's always meant a lot to me.

Sierra:

Listen to the song here in my heart

(I do a pirouette)

A melody I start but can't complete

(I run backwards, and then lift up my right leg, holding it above my head as I spin)

Listen, to the sound from deep within

(I stretch upwards, bringing my hands up above my head and perform another pirouette)

It's only beginning

(I bend backwards into a back bend)

To find release

(I stretch back up, releasing my arms, and perform a series of three spins)

Oh, the time has come

(I do a series of split leaps towards the front of the studio)

For my dreams to be heard

(I stretch out to one side, and then turn to face the mirror, punching my arm out)

They will not be pushed aside and turned

(I stretch upward, lunge with my head back, and then take a few steps forward, and lunge to the side, my arms outstretched in a pushing motion)

Into your own

(I slide across the floor on my knees and then stretch my legs out into a pike position, my hands reaching out and touching my feet)

All cause you won't

(I do a backward roll out of the move)

Listen

(I walk backwards with my left hand outstretched)

Listen, I am alone at a crossroads

(I run forwards and then perform two split leaps, and then I place one leg on the floor with my hands grasping that leg, and move the other leg upwards spinning it around. I then perform a cartwheel)

I'm not at home, in my own home

(I do 3 drag splits across the floor, dragging myself forward with each one)

And I've tried and tried

(I lift my left leg up above my head and spin on one leg going clockwise)

You should have known

(I spin around, landing on my side)

Oh, now I'm done believing you

(I lift my left leg up, and roll so I'm sitting on my side, then I push myself up, so I'm sideways with my right hand pressing on the floor, and then I push myself back up)

You don't know what I'm feeling

(I fall forwards, and then I take a step backwards, with my left leg in the air and then I turn so my back is facing the mirror)

I'm more than what you made of me

(I spin, then I bring my right arm down in circle, I turn to my left, with my right arm facing forwards and my legs split apart, then I bring my right arm back up again, turning to face the mirror)

I followed the voice that you gave to me

(I turn so my right leg is bent forward and my left leg is straight behind, my arms in a bent Y shape above my head. I then bring my arms down and together, bending my right leg forward and left leg back as I lower to the floor. I then put my arms down and bring my legs in towards them. I then stretch my right leg out with my left leg bent beneath me. I bring my leg down, leaning toward the floor)

But now I gotta find my own

(I come up, so I am on my knees, both facing toward the left with my left arm pointing in the air. I roll onto my feet, turning as I come up)

You should have listened

(I stretch my right leg upwards with my right arm pointing upwards and my left arm pointing back, and then I do a forward roll from that position, landing on my back with one leg straight and the other leg up in the air)

There is someone here inside

(I bring myself into a squatting position, and circle my left arm backwards and then the right one)

Someone I'd thought had died

(I turn to my left and bring my leg up in an arabesque. I lift my leg above my head and spin)

So long ago

(I do a pirouette)

Oh, I'm screaming out, and my dreams will be heard

(I run with my arms outstretched and when I reach the mirror perform a star jump)

They will not be pushed aside on words

(I bring my arms down in a cross, and then fling them back with my head down. Then I move my hands across my body to my right in a pushing motion, and then I spin on my right leg, with my left arm pointing straight up, my left leg bent behind me, and my right arm pointing out to the side)

Into your own

(I walk a few steps forward and reach out with my left hand, my right hand touching my left shoulder)

All cause you won't

(I run a few steps to the edge of the studio)

Listen

(I balance on my right leg and kick my left leg upwards, my left arm pointing straight up, and my right arm pointing straight down)

Listen, I am alone at a crossroads

(I spin, then perform three split leaps, spinning between each one, and finish in an arabesque)

I'm not at home in my own home

(I do three drag splits across the floor, dragging myself forwards with each one)

And I've tried and tried

(I lift my left leg above my head and spin on one leg going clockwise)

To say what's on my mind

(I perform a pirouette)

You should have known

(I kick my left leg up, leaning back as I spin around)

Oh, now I'm done believing you

(I lean forward, with my arms behind me, then I bring them forward, I turn and take a step to the side, with my right leg pointing out above the floor, and then I side step into a butterfly jump, my right leg landing first then the left. I spin on landing)

You don't know what I'm feeling

(I run forward, and slide down onto my knees, reaching forward with my arms)

I'm more than what you made of me

(I lean backwards, pressing my arms down on the floor, and then I bring my legs up so I am in a bridge position. I kick my left leg over first, then the right so I land in the splits)

I follow the voice you gave to me

(I do 3 split leaps across the floor, my arms reaching out)

But now I gotta find my own

(I do 3 pirouettes in a sequence)

I don't know where I belong

But I'll be moving on

If you don't

If you won't

(I perform several spins, with my right leg kicking out and then coming in again for this sequence, and my arms out in a circle in front of me)

Listen to the song here in my heart

(I do another pirouette)

A melody I start

(I do a series of side steps, swinging my arms up and down as I go)

But I will complete

(I perform 3 split leaps, and land on my knees, reaching upwards)

Oh, now I'm done believing you

(I lift my left leg up and spin on one leg for three rotations)

You don't know what I'm feeling

(I fall to my knees and then onto my stomach, dragging myself forward with my arms reaching out)

I more than what you made of me

(I walk forward, and kick my right leg out, then my left, switching legs with each step until I reach the mirror)

I followed the voice you think you gave to me

(I jump in the air, with my left leg bent forward and right leg bent back, and spin in the air, landing in the same position)

But now I gotta find my own

(I pull myself down into the splits, then I roll over onto my back, and to end the routine bring my legs into my chest)

I think that maybe the best routine I've ever done, even better than the one I practiced yesterday that I thought I was going to do for the showcase. This would be even better for the showcase, because this song means so much to me and so I can put more emotion into the routine than I could with the other one. I take a shower in the studio locker rooms and wash my hair, before drying myself off. Then I change into my school clothes, except keeping my trainers on because I can't cycle in heeled boots, and cycle the ten minutes home.

When I get home, there's still about an hour before my dad makes breakfast, so I go up to my room and record some songs to put up on my YouTube channel, as well as practicing my audition song. I've had a YouTube channel for two years, and I'm hoping that one day I'll be discovered, like Justin Bieber, Carly Rae Jepsen, 5 Seconds of Summer or Charice, but I'm even better obviously. I want to be as big as Beyonce (although that's not exactly possible, no one could compare to Queen Bey), but I want to be able to get out of this state, and travel the world, and have several number one albums. It's a big dream, but I know it's going to happen, because I'm going to make it happen.
"Si? Are you coming for breakfast?" Abby calls from outside the door.

"Coming, I just need to do my hair" I call.

"Okay well be quick, Papa made waffles" she calls back. I quickly blow dry my hair, and then straighten it, before walking downstairs into the kitchen.

"You took your time" Pops says.

"Sorry, I was practicing my audition song for Glee and I lost track of time" I say.

He places a plate of waffles in front of me, covered in maple syrup and strawberries. "Your favourite" he says.

"Thanks Pops, this looks great" I say, digging into the food.

"I heard you leaving early this morning, not that long after Freya. Where did you go?" he asks.

"I just went to the studio a little earlier than normal, I couldn't sleep" I reply.

"I heard you scream, did you have the nightmare again?" Pops asks.

"I don't want to talk about it" I say, my walls immediately going up, as they do when anyone asks about that night.

"It might help you if you talked to someone about it?" Pops suggests gently.

"I don't want to, okay, enough people know about it already without adding a shrink into the mix" I say.

"Well if you ever do want to talk about it, you know I'm here right?" Pops asks.

"I know Pops, thank you" I say.

"Did you see Freya on your way out?" he asks.

"No, she was either still up in her room or gone by the time I left. I suspect she was gone though" I say.

"She does know that she doesn't have to sneak out right? We don't mind her going to her mother's grave" Pops says.

"I think she does it because she doesn't want to talk about her mother, and she knows that if she told us she was going there then we'd want to go with her, so it's just easier to sneak out" I say.

"Maybe I should drive us down to the Cemetery, see if we can find her and talk to her?" Abby suggests.

"No, give her some time and space. Let her come to you, if you go to her then all she's going to do is push you away" Pops says.

"But Pops, you've been waiting six years for Freya to open up to you and she still hasn't. Maybe she needs a little nudge?" I suggest.

"No she doesn't. You two can understand how emotionally traumatised that poor girl is, especially you Abby, so we will wait, and one day whenever that is, she will be ready to open up to us and accept us as her family, but if you push her then all you are doing is pushing her further away" he says.

"I guess" I say, although I really just want her to talk. She might act all tough, but I'm sure that's just a cover. We want to do as Dad asked us yesterday, and try to get closer to Freya, but she won't let anyone get close to her. I'm her sister, and to be honest, I can't say I know anything about her that other people wouldn't.

"How did your practice go CeeCee?" Pops asks me.

"It went well actually, my grade 8 routine is coming together quite nicely. I'm obviously not as good as Freya but then no one is" I say.

"You could always ask her for help you know, she'd probably agree, even if she doesn't like spending time with people she loves ballet" Pops says.

"Maybe I will" I say. I know Abby plans on asking Freya for help with her exam routine, so it couldn't hurt for me to ask too could it? That way we could all spend time together, like Dad wants. We all excel in different areas of dance, Abby is amazing at contemporary (I love it too but I'm not as good as she is), my best area is hip-hop (since hip-hop and street are the dance styles we do in McKinley Mixers, my dance troupe) and Freya is incredible at ballet, she's already taking her Advanced 1 exam which is part of the Vocational Syllabus, something Abby and I haven't even started on yet, even though at our ages, we could have taken all our exams by now.

"Good, it will be good for you to spend more time together" Pops says.

"Yeah well she hasn't said yes yet" I mutter under my breath, although Pops pretends he didn't hear me, I know he did.

"How's McKinley Mixers going CeeCee?" Pops asks.

"It's going great thanks dad, we're practicing for a big dance competition in January, and it's going to be amazing!" I say, happily.

"With that and Glee Club, you look set to have more championship titles this year" he says.

"That's the plan" I say. I'm nice sure, but when it comes to dance, or anything performance related, I want to win, there's no doubt about that.

"Si we should probably get going, I don't want to be late for school" Abby says, checking her watch for the time. I nod, and follow her out to Dad's clunker, and we set off for school. We mostly chat about our big ballet exam and how our practice is going, as well as my audition for Glee Club. I can tell that Abby wants to ask me about my nightmare, but thankfully she doesn't. That was a dark time in my life, and I just don't like talking about it, any more than Abby or Freya like talking about their own experiences. I suppose it's kind of ironic that our dads ended up with three daughters who all went through similar things in their childhood before they were adopted, although Abby and Freya have it worse than I do, I didn't know the man who abused me.

"Are you okay?" Abby asks me, and I realise that I've zoned out.

"I'm fine" I reply forcing myself to smile. "How are you doing with the whole looking for your mom thing?" I ask.

"I dug out my birthday cards from her and got her address, and wrote a letter to her last night. I'll have to post it this afternoon and it might take a while to get to her, but at least it's something" she says.

"I'm sure she'll reply to you" I say.

"I hope you're right" she says. We're both quite quiet for the rest of the drive, each pulled into our own thoughts. I'm a little jealous of Abby, and Freya, not of their dads, they were both douchebags, and I know what it's like to have a dad, but of their moms. It's pretty clear that Abby's mom loved her, otherwise she never would have sent her here, and I know that Freya's mom loved her, if she didn't then Freya wouldn't miss her so much, but I never had a mom. Well obviously I did, but she died when I was only one, so I can't remember her. I have pictures of her, and I make up stories in my head of what she was like, but I'll never really know. The closest thing I ever had to a mom was Tasha, and that didn't exactly work out well. I love my dads, but I just wish that I had a mom sometimes, even if Dad is good at all the girly stuff that me, Abby and Freya like to do, it's not quite the same.

The silence starts to feel a little uncomfortable, so I turn on the radio, and find a station where a song that both Abby and I like is playing. We sing at the tops of our voices until we reach the parking lot at school. "I'll see you later" I say to Abby, giving her a hug.

"Okay, meet you here at four?" she asks.

"That would be great" I reply.

"CeeCee" I hear a voice call from across the parking lot. I spot Sydney Lawson, one of my best friends from McKinley Mixers. I would walk over to her, but I know she'll just come running over to me, so I wait, and sure enough she does. Sydney is great, she's lovely person, if a little hyper and excitable.

"Hey Syd, how are you doing?" I ask her.

"Great, I just found out that my mum got me tickets to see The Lion King in the West End for my birthday" she says.

"But your birthday's not until April" I reply.

"Who cares? I get to go see my favourite West End show with my best friends! You'll come right?" she asks.

"You know I will" I say.

"So how was your weekend? I didn't see you yesterday, so I didn't get to ask" she says.

"It was the same as every weekend is, you know, practicing for my grade 8 exam mostly, and doing homework, the usual" I say.

"I went back home at the weekend, got to see some of my old friends, went shopping on Oxford Street, we went to see Wicked, it was so much fun. I forget how much I miss London until I go back there, the energy, the people, there's nothing like it" she says.

I should explain, Sydney's originally from London, but her dad got a job over here a few years ago, and so she had to move. She's always going on about how much she loves her home city, which can be kind of irritating, but it's understandable, after all London sounds like a hell of a lot more fun than Lima.

"How's Charlotte?" I ask. Charlotte is Sydney's younger sister; she's in my grade, whereas Sydney is a Junior.

"She's great, she's got a new boyfriend" she says.

"That was fast; I thought she just broke up with the old one a few weeks ago?" I say.

"She did, but this isn't some guy she just met. His name's Josh, they've been friends since they were little kids. Okay so they're not actually boyfriend and girlfriend yet, but they've been texting non-stop ever since we got home, so it's definitely heading in that direction" she says.

"Good for her. What about you Syd? Anyone new in your life?" I ask.

"No, not since that last douchebag dumped me for a Cheerio. Why? Do you know anyone?" she asks eagerly.

"Yeah I think I just might" I say.

"Could you introduce us?" she asks.

"Sure, I'll see if she'll go out for coffee with us this afternoon" I say, laughing at her enthusiasm.

"She?" she asks.

"That's okay right? You are still bi aren't you?" I ask worriedly.

"Of course, you know what I say, why limit yourself to 50 % of the population…" she says, but I interrupt her.

"When you can choose from 100%" I say.

"Damn straight. It wasn't that, it was just that I haven't been out with a girl in a while that's all, but I mean if you know a hot one….." she says.

"Oh she's hot alright" I say and Sydney raises her eyebrows at me. "I mean if you're into that kind of thing" I say, making her laugh.

"I got what you meant, I'd love to meet her" she says.

"Okay, I have History with her after break so I'll ask her then" I say.

"Thanks CeeCee" she says.

"Don't mention it, that's what friends are for" I say.

"So how's your solo going?" she asks.

"Huh?" I reply.

"Your solo? For our routine for McKinley Mixers?" she asks.

"Oh man, I haven't even done much work on it this week, I've been so focused on practicing my grade 8 routine and my audition for Glee Club" I say.

"Oh Meghan's going to kill you! I had to some practice time in between going to London, but I have to say I haven't practiced much either so she'll kill me too. Wait what's Glee Club?" she says.

"It's like a singing and dancing club, you perform as a big group and compete in competitions and stuff" I say.

"That sounds like so much fun! When are auditions?" she asks.

"I think they end today, why do you want to join? It's a little short notice to perfect an audition song" I say.

"Oh please, I've had all the songs from the Lion King memorised since I was six, I could perform any one of them in my sleep" she says.

"Well I'm going to my audition at lunchtime, so you can come with me, if you want" I say.

"I think I will. It's going to be so much fun doing duets together, because you can bet we'll be the most talented girls in that club" she says.

"Damn right!" I say, and we both laugh. We stop at our lockers to get our things, and then we both separate off in different directions, me to my Math class, and her to her History class.

I hate school, I'd much rather be performing than spending all day behind a desk. The morning seems to drag by so slowly, but eventually, the buzzer that signals the start of lunch rings. Sydney meets me in the girls' bathroom and after I change into my dance clothes, we walk over to the auditorium together.

"Hi Aunt Rachel, Aunt Quinn" I say. Unlike most of the glee kids, Aunt Rachel really is my aunt, given that she's my dad's step-brother's wife. Aunt Quinn is just an honorary aunt though, like all of the other Glee kids' parents are to me.

"Hey Sierra, nice to see you. I see you brought a friend?" Aunt Rachel says.

"This is Sydney Lawson" I say.

"She's in my drama class" Aunt Quinn whispers to Aunt Rachel.

"Will the two of you be auditioning separately or together?" Aunt Rachel asks.

"We'll be auditioning separately" I say.

"And who wants to go first?" she asks. Sydney nods at me to indicate that I can go first if I want to.

"I will" I say. Sydney walks off into the wings.

"What will you be singing?" Aunt Quinn asks.

"Shark In The Water by VV Brown" I say.

"Let's hear it" she says.

I nod to the sound guy to put my backing track in and then the music starts, and I begin to sing and dance. My routine is a hip-hop routine, and so involves a lot of break-dancing, popping, jerking, locking, and quite a few gymnastic tricks.

Sierra:

Sometimes I get my head in a dilly

Feeling so lost, ticking you off

Now boy, you know me well

Said, I'm that kind of feeling

That kind of soft, that kind of silly

But when I'm in doubt, I open my mouth

And words come out, words come out like

Baby, there's a shark in the water

There's something underneath my bed

Oh, please believe I said

Baby, there's a shark in the water

I caught them barking at the moon

Better be soon

High in the sky, the song that I'm singing

A sweet little lie, I cry wolf, I cry

Rabbit out of the hat, yes, so that's why I'm bringing

Some tricks up my sleeve, for noticing me

It wouldn't cause you any harm, I just want you in my arms

I can't help, I can't help myself

Baby, there's a shark in the water

There's something underneath my bed

Oh, please believe I said

Baby, there's a shark in the water

I caught them barking at the moon

Better be soon

(Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do)

(Better be soon)

(Do, do, do, do, do, do, do)

(Do, do, do, do, do, do, do)

Right is right

Rules are rules

This is more like April Fool's

I'm just winding you up, oh

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick

Please don't make too much of it

It ain't that serious

Baby, there's a shark in the water

There's something underneath my bed

Oh, please believe I said

Baby, there's a shark in the water

I caught them barking at the moon

You better get here soon

Baby, there's a shark in the water

Baby, there's a shark in the water

Baby, there's a shark in the water

I caught them barking at the moon

Better be soon

I do a double somersault to finish my routine and then take a bow.

"What did you think?" I ask.

"Wow, you can certainly sing, and that dance was incredible. It was very different to any of the other auditions we've seen" Aunt Rachel says.

"Good different or bad different?" I ask.

"Good different. You're in, we'll see you in the choir room on Friday at four, for the first glee club rehearsal" Aunt Rachel says. I run off the stage excitedly and Sydney gives me a big hug.

"Congratulations CeeCee" she says.

"Your turn, good luck" I say.

"Thanks" she says, giving me a smile and then walking out onto the stage.

"What will you be singing Sydney?" Aunt Quinn asks her.

"The Circle of Life from The Lion King" she says.

"Great choice, let's hear it" Aunt Quinn says to her. Sydney indicates to the pianist that she can leave and then takes a seat behind the piano and starts to sing and play.

Sydney:

Nants ingonyama bagithi Baba

Sithi uhm ingonyama

Ingonyama

Nants ingonyama bagithi Baba

Sithi uhhmm igonyama

Ingonyama

Siyo nqoba

Ingonyama

Ingonyama nengw' enamabala

From the day we arrive on the planet

And blinking, step into the sun

There is more to see than can ever be seen

More to do, than can ever be done

There's far too much to take in here

More to find than can ever be found

But the sun rolling high

Through the sapphire sky

Keeps the great and small on the endless round

It's the Circle of Life

And it moves us all

Through despair and hope

Through faith and love

Till we find our place

On the path unwinding

In the Circle

The Circle of Life

It's the Circle of Life

And it moves us all

Through despair and hope

Through faith and love

Till we find our place

On the path unwinding

In the Circle

The Circle of Life

"What did you think?" she asks.

"I think you'd be a great asset to Glee Club Sydney. Our first rehearsal is in the choir room at four on Friday, so don't be late" Aunt Rachel says. Sydney runs off stage happily and we both squeal and hug each other.

"So did you ask that hot friend of yours whether she'd come for coffee with us?" Sydney asks me.

"I did, she said she'd love to. So we'll all meet on the steps after school and you'll drive us right?" I say.

"Okay sounds great. I can't wait to meet her. What's her name?" she asks.

"Candice Hantz, but you can call her Candi, everyone does" I say.

"Sounds intriguing, I can't wait to meet her" she says.

"She said she can't wait to meet you too" I reply.

"Are you going to be okay? I could bring a guy for you too if you're going to feel like a third wheel?" she suggests.

"It's okay, I'm not really looking for a boyfriend right now" I say.

"Are you sure? There's a great guy in my Calculus class that I could set you up with, he's really sweet, his name's Drew McCarthy" she says.

"McCarthy as in Madison and Mason McCarthy? My dad took them for Glee Club their first year" I say.

"McCarthy as in Mason McCarthy. He married Jane Hayward. He's the older brother of Connor McCarthy, and he's so sweet, you'd really love him" she says.

"It's okay really, I'm looking for someone my age anyway, but thanks Syd" I say.

"Well if you change your mind then I can always give him your number" she says.

"I won't but thank you" I say.

"Okay, well I'll see you after school then?" she asks.

"Yeah, see you after school" I say. I'm heading to my locker when my phone buzzes, so I stop to check my messages.

Sierra,

I know it's been a long time, but Andre and I want the chance to correct the mistakes of the past. I'm truly sorry for what happened to you when you were staying with us, but we want a chance to correct our past mistakes. If you would like this too, then we will be at the Lima Bean at 5pm on Saturday. Meet us there.

-Tasha

I almost drop my phone in shock. I haven't heard from them in eleven years, and suddenly, out of nowhere, they contact me. I'm not sure what to text back, on the one hand, if they really have changed, I'd like to see them, but on the other, I have real parents now. Still one meeting with them won't hurt will it?

Tasha,

Fine, I will meet with you, but don't expect anything. I have a good life now, and a great family, and nobody is going to screw that up for me!

-Sierra

I put my phone back in my pocket, and ignore it when it buzzes again. I just take my books from the locker and walk to my next class.

I just hope I haven't made a huge mistake by saying that I'll meet with Tasha and Andre.

Freya's POV

Flashback

I can hear them yelling outside my room, Mama left my door open. Daddy's screaming at Mama, but I can't tell why. I'm scared for Mama, when Daddy starts yelling at her, he usually hits her.

"You can get another job" she yells.

"Where? Where can I get another job Alice? I'm an unqualified 22 year old, nowhere half decent will touch me" he says.

"Then get another job at another garage. We can work this out" she says calmly.

"I won't get another job that pays half as well as that one did. This is all your fault" he yells.

"How? How is it my fault?" she screams back.

"Because if you had a better job then we wouldn't be in a mess right now" he says.

"If you hadn't got me pregnant when we were 15 then we wouldn't be in a mess right now!" she yells.

"And now we get the real truth. You're completely ungrateful for everything I've done for you and our daughter the past six years" he screams. I cover my ears because I don't like the noise.

"I'm not, I was merely pointing out the truth" she says quietly.

"So this is all the brat's fault?" he asks.

"No, it's no one's fault that you lost your job" she says.

"Yes but if we didn't have the brat, then it wouldn't be such a big problem" he yells.

"That's our daughter you're talking about" she says.

"I know, and I think she deserves to be punished for all the trouble she's caused" he says. I duck under my covers, scared of what Daddy is going to do.

"DON'T YOU DARE" Mama screams and I hear her move towards my door.

"Get out of my way bitch" my dad yells, and I hear the thud of my mama falling down. I start to tremble as I hear my daddy's footsteps coming towards me. He yanks me out of bed, and undoes his belt. He pulls up my shirt and hits my face with the belt, causing blood to run down my cheeks. I scream, and scream as he keeps hitting me, tears mingling with the blood on my cheek.

"STOP IT!" my mama yells, and I hear a loud thud. When I look up, Mama is holding a bedside lamp, and Daddy is lying face down on the floor.

"Come with me sweetie, we're leaving" she says. She picks me up, grabs a few things from my drawers and shoves them into a suitcase, before taking me to her room and doing the same, also getting some money from her safe whilst she's there. As soon as she's done that, she puts me down, takes the two suitcases and I follow her out of the house.

"Where are we going Mama?" I ask her.

"Away from here" she replies. She takes me down the alley by the side of the house.

"We'll stay here until Mama works out what to do next okay sweetie?" she says.

I nod gingerly, my cheeks stinging from the painful cuts Daddy gave me.

"Mama, it hurts" I say.

"I know honey, Mama will kiss it better okay" she says, kissing one of the still bleeding cuts.

"It still hurts" I say.

"I know sweetie, but I will make it better I promise" she says.

"Okay Mama" I reply.

"You're safe now sweetie" she says. She takes her coat out of her bag, and wraps me in it, and before long I have fallen asleep.

1 year later

Mama had to work late, so I'm waiting for her friend Maria to pick me up from after school club. We've been living at Maria's house ever since the night that Daddy hit me. Mama tried to go back to Grammy and Gramps' house but they wouldn't take us, so we went to live with Maria instead.

"Is your Mama going to be here soon, Freya?" Anna asks me. Anna is one of the ladies who plays with me after school.

"Mama is working late, Mama's friend Maria is supposed to be coming to pick me up" I say.

"Okay sweetie. Do you want to play a game whilst we wait?" she asks.

"Can I show you what I've been doing in dance class? I'm going to be a beautiful dancer, just like Mama" I say.

"Let's see it sweetheart" she says, and I start to show her some of the movements we've been practicing in ballet. About halfway through, the door opens and I see my daddy walk through. I haven't seen him in a year, since we left that night that he hit me.

"Can I help you?" Anna asks, and I cower behind her.

"I'm here to pick up my daughter Freya O'Hara?" he asks.

"I was told that a family friend was picking her up and you are not on the list of people who are allowed to pick her up, we specifically go over with the parents who is allowed to pick their children up from here and we will not let them go with someone who is not on the list" Anna says.

"Look I'm her dad, okay, I can show you identification if that's what you need" he says, handing her a driver's license.

"I'm not sure I feel comfortable with this" she says.

"Look I cleared it with her mother, it's okay" he says. Anna still looks unsure but to my horror she hands me over to my daddy.

"If you're sure" she says.

"I am, thank you. Come on Freya, let's go" he says. He drags me out of the room, and into the parking lot.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" I yell, trying to pull my wrist away from him.

"No way, you and your slutty mother made a fool of me a year ago, and you can't get away with that" he says. He takes me to his car, and shoves me into his boot.

"Don't make a sound, otherwise when I get you out of there, I will kill you" he yells. His voice sounds kind of muffled through the boot of the car but the message still came through loud and clear. I don't make a sound the entire drive, too scared to even move. I just want my mama to come and save me, like she did last time. The car comes to a stop, and I hear my dad's footsteps coming around to the back of the car.

"Get out" he says, not really giving me much choice as he drags me out by my collar.

I scream loudly to try and attract the attention of the neighbours, but my daddy clamps a hand over my mouth. He drags me into the house and up the stairs to my room. He tugs my shirt off, and then throws me onto the bed, tying my hands behind my back with my coat. He stuffs my t-shirt in my mouth and I almost choke on it. I kick my legs out in an effort to escape but it doesn't work.

"I have waited a whole year for this. Revenge will be so sweet" he whispers. My eyes widen in fear, but there's nothing I can do to stop him. I close my eyes expecting a blow that never comes. When I open my eyes, my daddy is naked in front of me. I try to scream, but I gag with the t-shirt in my mouth. He comes over to the bed, kneeling on top of me. He places a hand on one of the scars on my cheek, pressing into it. My eyes fill with pain, and I'm screaming in my head, even if I can't out loud. I kick at him, struggling as he pulls my jeans down. He rips my underwear away with his teeth, and I keep struggling but I can't push him off. I bite his shoulder, but my teeth are too small to make any real impact.

He almost crushes me with his body, as he jams himself inside me. I kick him repeatedly, trying to get him off but he just shoves himself in even deeper. I struggle against the bed frame, trying to loosen the coat that binds me to the bed frame, but he has tied me too tight. I'm not sure when I stop struggling, when I become resigned to the fact that this is happening to me. I don't actually know how long I lie there, with him hurting me, I'm vaguely aware of blood trickling down the inside of my leg, of him crushing my ribs, the feeling that I can't breathe. Eventually, I pass out, unaware of what he's doing to me, it's probably better that way.

Hours later I wake up, and he's still there, still shoving himself deeper and deeper into me. Everywhere hurts, my entire body feels like it's on fire. The t-shirt in my mouth is making it so that I can hardly breathe, and I try desperately to speak, so that he'll take the shirt out of my mouth and I can breathe properly again, but I can't.

I hear the door downstairs being unlocked; Daddy must have locked it when I wasn't looking.

"SHIT! You tell someone we were here?" he asks. I shake my head weakly. He slides out of me, and I fall back on the bed, completely drained. He grabs his clothes to the floor, and quickly starts dressing himself, pulling his t-shirt and jeans back on. I hear footsteps running up the stairs. Daddy tries to make it to the window but before he can, the door to my room is flung open and several cops and my Mama walk into the room.

"Baby! Are you okay?" she asks me. She pulls the t-shirt out of my mouth and unties my hands from behind my back.

"It hurts Mama" I croak.

"I know it does sweetie but you'll be fine, Mama's gonna make it better, I promise" she says, cuddling me close to her chest. I'm vaguely aware of the other men handcuffing my daddy.

I cry loudly into my Mama's shoulder, I don't know how long for. They call an ambulance, and carefully put me in the back of it, my Mama holding tightly onto my hand. I fall asleep but my nightmares are plagued by dreams of him and what he did.

End of flashback

I wake up, in a cold sweat, and shivering. I can never sleep fully through the night because I can't stop thinking about that night. I know that I'm not going to get back to sleep now, so I get up and creep silently down the stairs from my attic room, to the bathroom downstairs. I turn the light on, and look in the mirror. The scars on my face have faded a little, but they're still noticeable. I pick up a face cloth, and carefully damp my face to wipe the sweat away. I creep back upstairs to my room. I know that I'm not going to be coming back before school, so I open my wardrobe and quickly pick out an outfit, a long sleeved black and white shirt that says "Wake Me Up When It's Friday" on it, a black zipped hoodie, a pair of black skinny jeans with holes in the knees, and my favourite black combat boots. I dress, and then slip out the window and down the trellis. It's a little cold, I probably should have picked a thicker hoodie but I don't care.

I walk all the way to the cemetery, which is about half an hour walk from my house, but I don't mind, I enjoy the solitude. I check the pockets of my jeans to see if I have any loose change so I can buy some flowers. Luckily I do have a little, so I stop in a corner shop and buy a bouquet of pink roses, my mother's favourite flower.

When I arrive at the cemetery, it's pretty easy for me to find my mother's grave, since I've been coming here every day since I was eight. Her grave is at the far back of the cemetery, underneath a cherry blossom tree. I place the flowers up next to her headstone and then kneel by her graveside.

"Hi Mama, I miss you so much. I don't know why you had to leave me. You saved me from Daddy so many times, but then you just gave up and I don't know why. Was I not good enough? Did I not love you enough? It was supposed to be you and me against the world, or did you forget that? You left me with people who aren't my parents. Sure they're fine, but I've needed my mom these past six years and you haven't been here! You're my idol, I always admired how strong you were for me, taking all of Daddy's beatings so he wouldn't hurt me, working so hard so that I could have a life, how amazingly kind you were to everyone even the people who didn't deserve it, what a beautiful singer you were, and how amazingly you danced. I wish you could be here with me, so that we could dance together, so that you could still be my mom. Why could you not have stayed strong for me when I needed you? Why could you not have been here when I needed you? I NEEDED YOU AND YOU LEFT ME!" I say, screaming the last part, tears running down my cheeks. I still remember the day I found my mom dead with perfect clarity.

Flashback

"Mama?" I ask as I walk through the door to Maria's house. I haven't been back to after school club since the day it happened, over a week ago. I hate the stares of the other kids from school, most of whom know what happened having heard it on the news, so I snuck out of school and came home after lunch. The door was locked, but I found the spare key under the mat where it always is.

"Mama?" I call but there is still no answer. I walk up the stairs and the door to Mama's room is closed. I open the door, and carefully creep into the room, not making much noise in case Mama is asleep.

I scream when I see Mama. She's lying face down on the floor, her blonde hair fanning out behind her, in a pool of blood.
"WAKE UP MAMA!" I shout, shaking her shoulder. But she doesn't move. I want more than anything for her to sit up and talk, and tell me that this was all just some sick joke.

"NOOOOOO!" I scream, when she doesn't respond, even when I poke her and prod her, even punch her in the arm. Part of me knew she was dead as soon as I saw all the blood, but I didn't want to accept it. Now I have to.

"Why did you leave me Mama?" I ask through sobs.

End of flashback

I remember when Maria found me that evening, lying next to Mama, her blood soaking my hair. She screamed about as loudly as I did when I first walked in there. I wouldn't leave her for hours; the social workers had to drag me off of her body. I didn't speak for months afterwards, not until they said that there was a family willing to adopt me, and then I figured I'd better act nice otherwise I'd be stuck in that stupid care home until I was 18 and could look after myself. Kurt and Blaine (yes, I call them by their first names, they're not my parents, just my legal guardians), didn't even mean to adopt me. They wanted an eight month old baby, but due to a mix up, they ended up with me, a sullen, damaged eight year old girl. They probably still wish that they'd ended up with the eight month old baby; at least they don't come with huge amounts of emotional baggage.

I keep talking to my mom for hours, telling her all sorts of useless stuff, as I always do. I probably spend longer talking to my mom than I do anyone who's actually living, but it's easier to talk to someone who can't answer back, you can never disappoint them.

"Hey" someone says from behind me, putting a hand on my shoulder. I jump, flinching at the touch.

"What the hell? Do you always just come up to random girls at gravesides?" I yell.

"No I was cycling to school and noticed you, you looked cold" he says handing me his jacket.

"Who the hell are you?" I ask.

"Connor McCarthy, I'm in your 5th period Math class on Mondays" he says.

"And what are you really doing here?" I ask.

"I told you, I spotted you and I thought you looked cold, there was no ulterior motive" he says.

"Right well it was nice to see you, but I really should be going. Like you said we have school" I say, brushing him off.

"Well let me go with you" he says.

"I'm walking, you're cycling, I'll be far too slow for you" she says.

"And if I said I had sour patch kids? What would you say then?" he asks, dangling a bag of sour patch kids in front of me.

"Damn you! How did you know?" I ask.

"I sit behind you in Math, I've seen you eating them under the table a million times" he says.

"Fine" I sigh, grabbing the bag of sour patch kids from him. We walk together in silence until we reach his bike outside the cemetery gates.

"So whose grave was that anyway? Someone you know?" he asks.

"My mother" I say, shortly.

"What happened to her?" he asks.

"With all due respect I don't think I know you well enough to talk about that" I say. I don't talk about my mother with people I do know, let alone some strange boy that I've only just met.

"What about your dad?" he asks.

"In jail, and no, I don't want to talk about it" I say.

"Is there anything you will talk about?" he asks.

"As long as it doesn't involve my family, then you can know whatever the hell you want" I say.

"Fine, what do you like to do outside of school?" he asks.

"I'm a dancer" I reply.

"What kind?" he asks.

"All different kinds, ballet, hip hop, musical theatre, jazz, tap, you know a little bit of everything. You can't be a good dancer if you're not well rounded" I say.

"Are you good?" he asks.

"I'm good, probably not good enough, but I'm good" I say.

"Could I come watch you dance?" he asks.

"You just met me and suddenly you want to see me dance?" I ask sceptically.

"Okay, so I may have had a little crush on you" he admits.

"Ha! I knew you had an ulterior motive" I say, punching him gently.

"So go on, what type of dancer would you like to be? When you're older?" he asks.

"I love ballet, it makes me feel closer to my mom, but I like hip-hop too so maybe I'll choreograph for that. Or I might go into musical theatre, I haven't decided yet" I say.

"So your mom was a ballerina?" he asks.

"She would have been, if she hadn't had me at 16. But that's all you get" I say.

"Okay, I won't pry about your life I promise, you don't have to tell me anything that you don't want to" he says.

"Of course I don't, I never tell anyone anything I don't want to tell them" I say. "So what about you? You've been digging into my personal life; I think it's only fair I get to ask you about yours"

"Well my parents were music superstars, they toured all over the world with us, right up until my brother was 14 and they decided they should settle down, and stop touring for a while so that we'd both be able to go to high school in one place. They still release albums every couple of years though, and they own the music store in town, McCarthy's?" he says.

"I love that place! It's like my favourite place to study. Your parents own it?" she asks.

"Yeah they do, but I think you're the first person I've met who goes there to study" he says, laughing teasingly.

"What can I say? Your parents have great taste in music and the beanbag chairs are really comfy. You haven't ever studied there?" I ask.

"Yeah but my parents own the place so I work there for some extra cash, if I'm there late I study in my breaks. What I meant was I haven't heard of anyone who goes there specifically to study" he says.

"I guess I'm just unique" I say, smiling.

"Yes you are" he says, stroking my hair. I slap his hand away.

"Ground rule number two, no touching" I say. After what happened with my dad, I'm kind of insecure about guys touching me, so unless I decide that I can completely trust them, then I won't let them touch me.

"Fair enough" he says, moving his hand away from my hair.

"You're not going to ask why?" I ask surprised.

"I'm sure you have a good reason, and I promised I wouldn't pry, so no I'm not" he says. He's the first guy who hasn't asked "What the hell is your problem?" when I tell them not to touch me and that makes me inwardly smile.

"So you said you lived all over the world when your parents were touring? Where was your favourite place?" I ask.

"That's hard; we went to so many amazing places. I have to say, probably Canada, the people there were so friendly" he says.

"Ah I'd love to go there, I'm kind of jealous, you must have lived in so many different places whilst your parents were touring" I say.

"Well more like stayed in a lot of different places, we didn't exactly live anywhere for very long" he says.

"Still it must have been really cool" I say.

"It was, but it's nice just being in one place for a while. Have you done much travelling?" he asks.

"Kurt works for Vogue, so he gets us backstage passes to fashion weeks in New York, Paris, London and Milan, and we usually come back with a ton of free clothes, in fact we get a ton of free clothes from the Vogue Vault anyway, but we get even more on fashion week" I say.

"You call your Dad Kurt, not Dad?" he asks.

"This comes under the don't talk about my family category" I say.

"You brought it up not me" he points out.

"Well I don't want to talk about that. Look I'm sorry, but I just don't like talking about my family, at least not the really personal stuff" I say.

"Fine, what does your other dad do? I assume that's not too personal for you" he says.

"Blaine's in a band, they're called the Fettucine Alfredos" I say, and as expected he bursts out laughing.

"Where did he come up with that?" he asks.

"Kurt and Blaine always said that if they had a celebrity baby they'd name it Fettucine, but since they never had a celebrity baby, Blaine decided to name the band that. His friends thought it would be a memorable band name because everyone would think it was funny and wonder why they named it that" I say.

"When you put it that way it's actually kind of genius" he says.

"Yeah, they're quite good, I've seen them play a couple of times" I say.

"So what sort of music are you into?" he asks.

"A lot of different stuff actually, I like musical theatre obviously, some classical stuff too since I use it for ballet, some folk/indie stuff, pop, country, even a little alternative music, I think you should try a little bit of everything" I say.

"Nice approach, that's what I do too, try a little of everything, although I have to say my favourites are folk/indie type music and country, since I play guitar so those are easiest to play" he says.

"Could you teach me? I'd like to learn how to play an instrument, but the only one Blaine and Kurt know is piano, and it's not really my thing. I'd like to try guitar though" I say.

"Sure, I'd love to" he says smiling.

"Wait a second are your parents Jane Hayward and Mason McCarthy?" I ask.

"Well she's Jane McCarthy now but yes that's them? Why?" he asks.

"A friend of my parents, Kitty Lynn was friends with them in high school, she talks about them a lot" I say.

"Small world huh?" he says.

"Well we do live in Lima" I say, making him laugh. "So you said you had a brother?" she asks.

"Drew, yeah, he's 17" he says.

"What's he like?" I ask.

"Drew? Oh he's just the family star, everyone loves him. He's nice, funny, gets good enough grades that he could get into Harvard, is musical, sporty, he's basically good at everything" he says.

"Do a sense a little resentment?" I ask teasingly.

"Maybe just a little. It's hard to live up to the successful older brother. Do you have siblings? Wait am I allowed to ask that or does that break one of the 'ground rules'?" he asks teasingly.

"I have two sisters, Abby and Sierra, we're not that close. In fact I don't really talk to them. It's difficult to be close when you all come from different families and I only met them when I was 8" I say.

"What are they like?" he asks.

"Nice enough, I guess. Like I said, we don't spend that much time together. The only thing we really have in common is dance and singing" I say.

"Maybe you should spend more time together?" he suggests.

"Now that breaks the ground rules" I say.

"Which one?" he asks.

"Ground rule number three, don't interfere in the way I handle my family" I say.

"Noted" he replies. "So how did your sisters come to be adopted? Or are you not allowed to tell me that?" he asks.

"Sierra's parents died in a fire, and then after an incident with her foster parents she was adopted by Kurt and Blaine, and Abby was sent to America by her mom due to an incident with her dad and was then adopted by Kurt and Blaine" I say.

"You said you liked musical theatre, what's your favourite show?" he asks.

"Bonnie And Clyde" I admit shyly.

"The one about the two robbers? I don't know whether I should be impressed or scared" he says.

"It's a good musical, the music's great and the story's pretty good. What's your favourite musical?" I ask.

"Hairspray, it's my go to musical when I'm sick, it always makes me feel better" he says.

"Yeah that one's pretty good too" I say.

"So you said you like ballet, what's your favourite one?" he asks.

"Ballet? Swan Lake probably, there's nothing more beautiful than that ballet done well" I say.

"So that's what you want to do? Dance in something like that?" he asks.

"Maybe, although I'm not sure I'll ever be good enough" I say.

"I'm sure you're great" he says.

"It's not enough to be great, you have to be the best of the best" I say. "So what is it that you want to do?" I ask.

"I honestly don't know yet. Definitely something to do with music though, it's in my blood. You must understand that" he says.

"Yeah I do, I feel the same way about dance" I say. "Would you be interested in joining Glee Club?" I ask.

"Glee Club? We don't have one of those at school do we?" he asks.

"We do now; Rachel and Quinn are setting one up at school. I'm not going to join but I thought it might be something you'd be interested in" I say.

"Why aren't you going to join?" he asks.

"I don't want to talk about it, now do you want to, or not?" I ask.

"Sure I'd love to. Connor probably would too. When are auditions?" he asks.

"The last day is today, you can go whenever" I say.

"I still don't see why you don't want to join, you seem like you love music" he says.

"Yeah, but I don't want to and that's that" I snap. We continue to talk about music mostly, and he talks a little more about his family before we get to school. He manages not to piss me off anymore, respecting my ground rules and to my surprise we actually have a lot of fun. He's a funny guy, sweet and sensitive, but not afraid to tease me and he doesn't push me to tell him anything that I don't want to. I'm actually a little disappointed when we arrive at school.

"I've enjoyed hanging out with you, mysterious girl" he says. It makes me feel a little uncomfortable that he's flirting with me.

"Don't do that" I say.

"Do what?" he asks.

"The flirting thing, I'm not comfortable with it" I say.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know" he says. "I'd like to be friends though. I mean if you'd like that"

"I would. How would you like to go for milkshakes later?" I ask.

"The Shake Shack?" he asks.

"Only the best shakes in town" I say smiling.

"I'd love to. So friends?" he asks holding out his hand. I gingerly accept it, and feel this warmth flooding through my fingertips.

"Friends" I say smiling.

"I'll see you in Math fifth period? I have more packets of Sour Patch Kids" he says.

"You sure know the way to a girls heart" I say, winking.

"Now who's flirting?" he says.

"Goodbye Connor McCarthy" I say as we reach the top of the stairs.

"Goodbye Freya Hummel-Anderson" he says. We split off, I go to my locker and he goes to his, and then I walk to my English class.

The day goes pretty much as usual, I fall asleep in near enough all of my classes, because I didn't sleep thanks to my nightmares and my teachers get pissed off at me. This is a regular occurrence, if I'm not kept up because of my nightmare, I'm kept up because I procrastinate and leave all my work to the last minute which means I do it in the middle of the night, which on the upside means that I stave off my nightmares.

Finally, the buzzer goes for lunch, and I head out of my fourth period class. I'm actually really looking forward to Math today, thanks to Connor McCarthy. I eat alone today, since Ginny has her Glee audition, and I would normally eat with her.

"Look who it is, it's the Freak all on her lonesome" a voice says from behind me. I turn around to see Viola Barnes, McKinley's biggest bitch and her cronies.

"Can I help you?" I ask in my most sarcastic voice.

"Well that's not exactly very nice is it?" she asks in her faux sweet voice.

"What do you want Viola? Because if you're just here to irritate me, then I suggest that you go, before I do something that I might regret" I say, lowering my voice.

"Relax I thought you looked lonely and I thought I'd come and talk to you, you know, make friends" she says.

"I don't believe you" I say.

"You're right of course; I'd never want to be friends with a freak like you. As usual I just come over to make sure the little people know who's in charge. Making people's lives a misery is the highlight of my day" she says.

"Have at it Viola, I really couldn't care less" I say.

"I'm surprised you don't have a boyfriend yet Freya, really I am. I mean given your mother's history you should have a boyfriend by now, and be getting pregnant in the next few years like your slut of a mom did. No wonder she killed herself, having you probably ruined her life" she says.

I turn around and chuck my lunch tray right into her face. Then I punch her, hard in the nose. "YOU BITCH! YOU DON'T TALK ABOUT MY MOM LIKE THAT!" I say, raking my nails down her cheeks. She slaps me back, I kick her. I pull at her hair. We roll around on the floor, kicking each other, scratching each other, punching each other, even biting each other until eventually Quinn and Kitty pull us apart.

"Both of you to the Principal's office now!" Quinn yells, and both she and Kitty frogmarch us to Finn's office. They leave us both there, facing away from each other in the chairs outside the office.

"You started it, you shouldn't have said that about my mom" I say.

"Yeah well that doesn't give you permission to hurt me" she says.

"You knew that was going to happen" I say.

"I didn't say anything that wasn't true" she says. I grab her by the collar and force her to stare directly into my face.

"Do you want me to hit you again?" I ask threateningly. She turns away and we sit in silence until Finn comes out to get us.

"Come in both of you" he says. He waits for us to sit down before he speaks again. "I hear you were fighting in the cafeteria" he says, using the "I'm very disappointed in you adult voice".

"She started it" I say.

"Is that true Viola?" he asks.

"I said something that may have upset her, and then she went completely mental" Viola says.

"You said that my mom was a slut and that it was my fault that she killed herself!" I yell.

"Now Viola, I think you should apologise to Freya for saying that. It's extremely rude and heartless considering the situation" Finn says.

"I'm sorry" she says although it doesn't sound particularly heartfelt, but Finn doesn't push it, both he and I can see that's the best I'm going to get.

"Having said that, Freya you can't deal with every situation using your fists. You've only been here just over a week, and you've seen me more than most people do all year for getting into fights. If you're going to stay in this school then things have to change" he says.

"I'm sorry that I hit you, even though you totally deserved it" I say to Viola.

"So we need to talk about punishment for both of you. Viola, I think a week's worth of after school detentions will do, and I don't want to hear you complain, because I can dole out much worse punishments" he says.

"Okay" she says. He indicates that she can leave, and she walks out of the office toward her next class.

"What's my punishment? Because I don't think you want us in the same detention room" I say.

"You're probably right about that. Which is why I've decided that I'm going to require that you join Glee for this year" he says.

"What? Are you sure we can't go back to the detention thing?" I ask.

"No, my decision is final. I think a year in Glee will do you good. Might help you make some new friends, and learn to cooperate more with people. If you don't want to stay on after this year, then that's fine, but this year will be mandatory" he says.

"Or what?" I ask.

"Or I will suspend you, and that will go on your permanent record" he says. ish

"Are you sure there aren't any other options? Community service? Before school dentention? Extra credit essays?" I ask.

"Nope, it's glee club or suspension. Take your pick" he says.

"Fine I will join your stupid Glee Club, but I'm not happy about it" I say.

"That's kind of the point of a punishment Freya. You're not supposed to enjoy it" he says. "I will be checking with Rachel and Quinn that you went to the auditions and if I hear that you didn't then you will be immediately suspended, understand?" he says.

"I understand" I say sulkily.

"I really think this will be good for you Freya" he says. I don't answer, figuring that whatever smart retort I could say, would not make this situation any better. So I say goodbye to Finn, and then walk out of his office. I didn't get to finish my lunch since I threw it in Viola's face, so I head out and grab a burger from the Shake Shack, before coming back and grabbing my Math stuff from my locker.

I've never enjoyed Math so much, Connor sits behind me, and we pass notes between each other, and he smuggles Sour Patch kids under the desk to me. I kind of like him I guess, but it's probably never going to go anywhere. I don't trust guys, after all my dad was supposedly a nice guy and then he turned into a monster and my mom never even realized. I'm not going to let the same thing happen to me, just because Connor seems like a nice guy, that doesn't mean that he is.

When the final buzzer goes to signal the end of the day, I head over to the auditorium for my glee audition. Connor and Drew are on stage, sitting on stools with their guitars. I take a seat behind Quinn and Rachel, and listen to them sing. They both have really nice voices, although it's not a song I've heard before.

Connor:

If I drink this beer

I'll probably have two or three if I know me

I'll be digging up the past like it's money in the backyard

Drew:

If I drink this beer

I know it's gonna seem like a good idea

To call you up in the middle of the night

And tell you how I feel

Both:

So I should just put it down

The last thing I need to do tonight is push my luck

Drunk, get all messed up

And tell you how bad you need my love

And how you'll never find a guy like me again

Connor:

If I drink this beer

I know it's gonna lead to more

And I ain't sure what I'd do if I knocked on your door

And your boyfriend answered

Drew:

If I take just one sip

It's gonna get ugly quick

And, man, it's tough, cause I'm in love

And I need to ease the pain

So I just put it down

Both:

The last thing I need to do tonight is push my luck

Drunk, get all messed up

And tell you how bad you need my love

And how you'll never find a guy like me again

Connor:

I still won't get you back

And that beer is all I have to hold

And it's cold as you at the end of the telephone line

In the middle of the night

Both:

So I just put it down

The last thing I need to do tonight is push my luck

Drunk, get all messed up

Yeah I should just put it down

The last thing I need to do tonight is push my luck

Drunk, get all messed up

And tell you how bad you need my love

And how you'll never find a guy like me again

Drew:

If I drink this beer

I'll probably have two or three if I know me

I'll be digging up the past like it's money in the backyard

"Wow guys, that was great, you definitely make a great duo" Quinn says.

"Well we've had years of practice" Drew says, putting his arm around Connor. He looks a little uncomfortable; I'm guessing he doesn't enjoy always being part of a duo.

"You guys are in; we'll see you on Friday. First rehearsal is in the choir room at four" Rachel says. Drew and Connor have a short discussion between themselves, and then Drew walks off stage and Connor walks to the seats behind Rachel and Quinn and takes a seat next to me.

"I thought you weren't going to join Glee" he says.

"Freya you're up" Quinn calls.

"I'll tell you after" I whisper to him, and then walk up onto the auditorium stage.

"I'll be singing Not About Angels by Birdy, this is for my mom" I say. I take a seat on one of the stools and then start to sing.

Freya:

We know full well there's just time

So is it wrong to dance this line?

If your heart was full of love

Could you give it up?

Cause what about, what about angels?

They will come; they will go, make us special

Don't give me up

Don't give…me up

How unfair, it's just our luck

Found something real that's out of touch

But if you searched the whole wide world

Would you dare to let it go?

Cause what about, what about angels?

They will come; they will go, make us special

Don't give me up

Don't give….me up

Cause what about, what about angels?

They will come; they will go, make us special

It's not about, not about angels, angels

I don't look at Quinn and Rachel as I finish my song, because I can feel tears trickling down my face, and I hate it when people see me cry, it makes me feel vulnerable and I don't like that. After what my dad did to me, I promised myself that I would never be in a position where I could be that vulnerable again, and closing off my feelings to other people helps me do that.

"That song must mean a lot to you, you could definitely feel the emotion through the lyrics" Rachel says.

"Well my mom meant a lot to me" I say shortly.

"You're obviously in Freya, rehearsals are on Friday at four in the choir room and if you don't show up, we will be telling Finn" Quinn says.

"Fine" I say sulkily. I walk off the stage, and wait for a few minutes until Connor turns up.

"You have a lovely voice" he says.

"Thank you" I reply, wiping my wet cheeks.

"Were you crying?" he asks.

"No!" I respond defensively.

"Your mom must have meant a lot to you" he says.

"Of course she did, she was my mom. She sacrificed everything for me" I say.

"Sounds like a pretty great mom" he says.

"Yeah she really was" I say smiling. "Your audition was great too, although I couldn't help but notice you didn't look all that happy with your brother" I say.

"Sometimes I'd like to be just Connor McCarthy rather than part of the McCarthy brothers, I mean I love my brother and we sound great together but….." he says.

"But sometimes you want to be recognised for your own accomplishments" I finish.

"Yeah, that's right. So would you like to go to the Shake Shack? Like we said this morning?" he asks.

"I'd love to" I say and we head out of school together, chatting as we walk (well I walk, he cycles) to the Shake Shack.

Morgan's POV

"Morgan! Breakfast" Mami calls. I groan, not wanting to get up because I didn't go to sleep until 2 am, I was having an amazing Street Fighter run and I didn't realise how late it was until I was about halfway through my last run.

"Coming Mami!" I call. I quickly shower, and then go to my wardrobe to pick out an outfit to wear. My clothing style is preppy, so quite expensive, but I like to have clothes that no one else will have. I pick out a striped rugby shirt, a pair of white Bermuda shorts (with black tights underneath as its fall and so still cold), my purple flats and pearl earrings. I quickly dress and then walk downstairs, where to my surprise; just my moms are sitting around the kitchen table.

"Where's Lexi? And Brant?" I ask.

"Lexi left very early this morning, something about having breakfast with some cute guy named Kyle, who I know absolutely nothing about…." Mami says.

"Kyle's a guy from Dalton who she's crushing on" I say.

"How do you know this?" she says.

"She's my sister, sisters talk" I say shrugging.

"So what else did she tell you about this mysterious boy?" she asks.

"Nothing much, that he was really cute, that he goes to Dalton, that his mom was a Broadway actress, and that he has two younger sisters, one of whom is in one of your ballet classes" I say.

"What's his last name?" she asks.

"Walker" I say.

"Oh yes, Kyle Walker, his sister Callie is my class. He's come to pick her up a few times. He seems like a nice enough kid" she says.

"Well let's hope this one is better than Lexi's other boyfriends" I say.

"She does attract some stinkers" Mom says and we all laugh.

"So where's Brant?" I ask.

"Still asleep most likely, he's never one to wake up early" Mami says.

"He was up pretty late last night, he woke up in the middle of the night screaming and then he was talking to Lexi. I guess he must have had the nightmare again, and Lexi went in there to comfort him. She sounded upset herself, maybe you should talk to her" I say.

"What was she upset about?" Mom asks.

"I don't know, I wasn't listening that closely, I could just tell that she was upset" I say.

"Okay well we'll definitely have to talk to her" Mami says, sharing a worried look with Mom. I have a feeling that they know more about this than they're letting on, but I don't push it, I can just ask Lexi what she was upset about later. We're really close, as close as or even closer than siblings who are related by blood. I'm the odd one out of our siblings, Lexi is Mom's daughter, and Brant is Mami's son, whereas I'm adopted. It doesn't feel like that though, with my hair and colouring, I could be Mom's biological daughter, plus I've grown up in this family, I was put up for adoption basically as soon as I was born so this is the only family I've ever known, and I know I'm as much a Lopez-Pierce as Brant and Lexi.

"You alright Mo? You kind of drifted off a little there" Mom says.

"Yeah I was just thinking" I say smiling.

"So what's new with you Mo?" Mom asks.

"Not much really. Marcus and Kate refuse to leave me alone, they keep texting me to ask if I'll meet up with them, but I still don't want to" I say.

"Maybe they'll finally leave you alone if you just go to meet with them once. They are your family after all" Mom says.

"No they're not. My family are you guys and Lexi and Brant, the people who I grew up with and who cared about me my whole life. The only thing I have in common with them is blood, and really what does blood matter? Our family is living proof of that" I say.

"I know, but it can't hurt to know where you come from" Mami says.

"I don't need to know about my biological parents, they wanted to give me up, so I shouldn't have to feel like I should want to know them because if they wanted to know me then they would have kept me wouldn't they?" I say.

"Honey, I don't know why they gave you up, but you should never feel like you have to know them. No matter how much they bug you about it, it's your choice. I think you would both get some closure if you did but you're not obliged in any way to see them" Mami says.

"Good because I don't want to" I say.

"Do you not at least want to meet your sister?" Mom says.

"BRITTANY!" Mami exclaims.

"What?" I ask. "What the hell is she talking about?"

"I wasn't supposed to say anything was I?" Mom says.

"No" Mami says.

"Will someone please fill me in here? What sister are you talking about?" I ask.

"Your birth mom and dad asked us not to tell you this, but you have a twin sister" Mami says.

"What? And you just thought you wouldn't tell me this?" I ask.

"You said you didn't want anything to do with your biological family, we figured that included your sister. Plus your birth mom and dad asked us not to tell you and we wanted to respect their wishes" she says.

"So you just thought you'd lie to me?" I ask incredulously.

"Honey you never seemed interested in knowing about your biological family. If you'd really wanted us to, then of course your needs as our daughter would come first, and we would have told you" she says.

"Did you not think that the fact that I have a biological sibling is something that I'd like to know?" I ask.

"You were the one that said that family isn't all about blood" she says.

"But that was about my parents, not about my sister, she hasn't done anything wrong" I say.

"We were nervous about telling you, because we thought you might resent the fact that they kept her and not you" Mom says.

"Well it doesn't make me resent her, it makes me resent them even more" I say. "What do you know about her?" I ask.

"Not much to be honest honey, we haven't kept in touch with your birth family. We know that she's your identical twin, that her last name is Hantz, and that she goes to McKinley and that's honestly about it. I'm sure you could find out who she is, Hantz is not a very common last name and there's only going to be one girl who looks exactly the same as you" Mom says.

"But there are a million girls at school, so who knows if I'll ever even meet her?" I ask.

"I honestly don't know, but if you want more information about her, your best bet would be to ask Martha and Marcus" Mami says.

"Well I'm obviously not going to do that. I'll just ask in the office at school and see if they can tell me if there's anyone under the name Hantz" I say.

"Are you mad at us?" Mom asks.

"For not telling me? Yes!" I say indignantly.

"We are sorry, sweetie, really" Mami says.

"I know but it's going to take me a while to forgive you" I say. We hear footsteps coming downstairs.

"I know you're not happy with us right now, but can you at least be civil for Brant?" Mami says.

"Fine" I say. Brant walks into the kitchen, and we act like our previous conversation never happened, than mom never dropped the bomb that I have an identical twin sister. We talk about Lexi's new crush, and Brant and I's lack of dating life, and then about school, and glee club. Brant then goes to get changed, and my moms and I sit in silence, I'm not willing to keep up the act of not being upset with my moms for longer than I have to. Brant them comes back and we leave, with Mami. We talk about classes and our auditions for glee club mostly, and I talk a little about cinema club, not bringing up the conversation about my twin sister. Brant drops Mami off at the studio and then he drives me to school. We talk about jobs that he could possibly get to save up for his own car until he pulls up in the school parking lot. Brant and I say goodbye and I head off to find my friend Clara.

"Hello Freak" Viola Barnes says, stopping me in the hallway with a cherry slushie in her hands.

"Can we make this quick? I'm meant to be meeting my friend Clara" I say.

"I realised that you were the only geek in Cinema Club that I hadn't slushied yet this year" she says.

"Only me? There's thirteen of us and it's only the second week of term. You act fast" I say.

"You know it happens a lot quicker if you don't talk" she says. She raises her arm and is about to throw the slushie at me, when a cute guy in a letterman jacket jumps in front of me.

"Leave her alone Vi, she's not doing anything to you" the guy says.

"You know the social order in this school Jackson, we have to show the little people where they stand" she says.

"No we don't. Morgan doesn't deserve to be slushied just because she's in a club that you deem to be unpopular" he says. I'm surprised that he knows my name, he's an attractive jock and I'm…..well I'm nothing.

"Fine, but I don't want to waste this slushie" she says.

"Then why don't you drink it?" he asks.

"I can think of a more fun way to use it" she says, throwing the slushie in his face.

"See you later losers" she says, throwing her hair over her shoulder and flouncing away.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"Wow I never realised how much slushies burned" he says.

"I can help you clean off, it's the least I can do after you taking a slushie for me" I say. We go to the boy's locker room, and I help him clean the slushie off.

"I'm sorry I can't do anything about your clothes" I say.

"It's okay, I guess I'll just have to wear my sports kit for the rest of the day" he says.

"Thank you for doing that, you didn't have to" I say.

"Yes I did, Viola Barnes is a bitch, and people don't deserve to be slushied just because they're less popular than she is" he says.

"You're not at all how I imagined" I say.

"How so?" he asks.

"Well you're sweet, from the way people talk about Jackson Avery, I expected you to be a leather jacket wearing, cigarette smoking, motorcycle riding, bad attitude kind of guy with several girls hanging off each arm" I say.

"Well I can't deny the motorcycle, or the girls, or the leather jacket, but the smoking thing is absolutely not true and the bad attitude is a myth" he says.

"I'm sure everything you've heard about me is probably true" I say.

"Well no, one thing was wrong" he says.

"What's that?" I ask moving a little closer into him.

"People underestimated how cute you are" he whispers in my ear. I think he's about to kiss me when the buzzer interrupts us, indicating that we have to head to class.

"I'll see you around" I say, nervously twirling a strand of hair around my finger.

"Yeah, see you around, Blondie" he says.

"Blondie?" I ask.

"It's kind of my thing, I have a nickname for everybody" he says.

"I prefer Mo" I say.

"What your last name again?" he asks.

"Lopez-Pierce" I say.

"What about Molo then?" he asks.

"You know what I don't hate it. Can I pick a nickname for you?" I ask.

"Sure why not?" he says.

"Jackie" I say.

"Really?" he asks.

"I think it's cute" I say.

"It makes me sound like a five year old girl" he says.

"What about Javie then?" I suggest.

"Fine, see you later Molo" he says.

"See you later Javie. I'll try not to blame you too much for making me late for class" I say.

"Was it worth it?" he asks.

"Completely" I say, winking before I turn to walk away. I head to my locker, grab my Math books and run all the way to class, even though I'm already late. I arrive at my math classroom, sweaty and panting and take my seat next to Clara.

"He's not even here yet?" I ask.

"No, he's not, he's probably stuck in traffic or something, but if it gets us out of doing Algebra, I wouldn't complain. Hey where were you this morning? I waited forever for you and you never showed?" Clara says.

"Oh, I had a run in with Viola Barnes. She was going to slushie me, but then this cute guy took the slushie for me, and I went to help him clean it off" I say.

"Sounds like somebody has a crush. What's his name?" she asks.

"Jackson Avery" I say.

"No, No, No!" she says.

"What? What's wrong with him? He seemed sweet enough, and I think he liked me, he gave me a cute nickname" I say.

"And that's how it starts. This is all a play Mo, he does this to almost every single girl he goes out with. It starts with the slushie save, then he gives you the cute nickname. Then you ask him out and he agrees. You date for a while, and then you have sex, and trust me, you will have sex because he's charming, and cute and it just feels oh so right. As soon as he gets what he wants from you, he will move onto someone else, but he hates confrontation, so he won't actually dump you, he'll just cheat on you. You discover him cheating, and break up with him, leaving him free to do this on another innocent girl and you're left broken hearted" she says.

"That seems a little judgemental; maybe he's not like that anymore. And how do you know anyway?" I say.

"It's not judgemental, ask anyone of the girls he's been out with and they won't be too hard to find because he's been out with half the school, including me" she says.

"He went out with you?" I ask.

"No need to sound so surprised, some people do consider me a catch. Anyway, we dated for about three months, started the exact same way; he saved me from being slushied, called me Clary. After about three months, we had sex; I really thought he was in love with me. A few days later I found him in a motel room on top of Hannah Jakes, and I spent the next two weeks crying in my bedroom singing along to country heartbreak songs" she says.

"Well maybe you just weren't the right girl for him" I say.

"Don't you get it Mo? No one's the right girl for him. He just goes from girl to girl and doesn't care who he hurts in the process. I don't want you to be hurt by him too, you're my best friend" she says.

"He really doesn't seem like he wants to hurt me" I say.

"The ones who seem nice are always the most dangerous, Mo. Just be careful, okay?" she says.

"Fine but I really don't think I have anything to worry about" I say. Our conversation is interrupted by Mr Sykes, our math teacher walking in, so we stop talking, and get to work, although there is still a palpable tension between the two of us. I get that Jackson hurt her, and that she wants to protect me, but I don't think I need protecting.

The rest of the morning passes quite slowly, and Clara doesn't talk to me, in any of the other classes that we share together. I don't know why she's so mad at me; I mean I can't help the fact that I find Javie cute. Besides it's not as if I want to marry the guy, I just want to date him. Whatever happens will happen, and it's not as if I don't know anything about his history, I've seen him with more than one girl on his arm, more than once. I'm perfectly prepared for the chance that he's going to break my heart, but I'm willing to take the risk that he's not.

I have a free period after lunch, so I decide to go over to the auditorium and do my audition for Glee Club. Before I go, I change clothes, as I'm doing a Hannah Montana song, so I wanted to really get into character, I decide to go all country and western with a checked shirt, and jeans, fringed jacket and rhinestone covered cowboy boots. After I've changed I walk over to the auditorium. There's no one else there, just Aunt Quinn and Aunt Rachel waiting for more people.

"Hi Aunt Quinn, Aunt Rachel" I say.

"Wow, you look a lot different than normal Mo" Aunt Quinn says.

"It's part of my audition, I wanted to get fully into character" I say.

"And what will you be singing Mo?" Aunt Rachel asks.

"Nobody's Perfect by Hannah Montana" I say.

"Let's hear it" Aunt Quinn says. I grab the mike from the stand, and start to sing, dancing around as I do.

Morgan:

Everybody makes mistakes

Everybody has those days

1, 2, 3, 4

Everybody makes mistakes

Everybody has those days

Everybody knows what, what, I'm talkin bout

Everybody gets that way

Everybody makes mistakes

Everybody has those days

Everybody knows what, what, I'm talkin' bout

Everybody gets that way

Sometimes I'm in a jam

I've gotta make a plan

It might be crazy

I do it anyway

No way to know for sure

I figure out a cure

I'm patchin' up the holes

But then it overflows

If I'm not doin' too well

Why be so hard on myself?

Nobody's perfect

I gotta work it

Again and again

'Til I get it right

Nobody's perfect

You live and you learn it

And if I mess it up sometimes

Nobody's perfect

Sometimes I work a scheme

But then it flips on me

Doesn't turn out how I planned

Gets stuck in quicksand

But no problem can't be solved

Once I get involved

I try to be delicate

Then crash right into it

But my intentions are good, yeah, yeah, yeah

Sometimes just misunderstood

Nobody's perfect

I gotta work it

Again and again

'Til I get it right

Nobody's perfect

You live and you learn it

And if I mess it up sometimes

Nobody's perfect

I gotta work it

I know in time I'll find a way

Nobody's perfect

Sometimes I fix things up

And they fall apart again

Nobody's perfect

I know I mix things up

But I always get it right in the end

You know I do

Next time you feel like

It's just one of those days

When you just can't seem to win

If things don't turn out the way you planned

Figure something else out

Don't stay down, try again, yeah!

Everybody makes mistakes

Everybody has those days

Everybody knows what, what I'm talkin' 'bout

Everybody gets that way

Everybody makes mistakes

Everybody has those days

Everybody knows what, what I'm talkin' bout

Everybody gets that way

Nobody's perfect

I gotta work it

Again and again

'Til I get it right

Nobody's perfect

You live and you learn it

And if I mess it up sometimes

Nobody's perfect

I gotta work it

I know in time I'll find a way

Nobody's perfect

You live and you learn it

'Cause everybody makes mistakes

Nobody's perfect

(Nobody's perfect)

No no

Nobody's perfect!

"So what did you think?" I ask.

"I wasn't too keen on the song, but I like your voice, and your energy, it would be great to see what you could do on a different song" Aunt Rachel says.

"So does that mean I'm in?" I ask.

"You're in, we'll see you at our first rehearsal on Friday in the choir room at four" Aunt Quinn says.

"Thank you guys, I'll see you then" I say. I walk off the stage, and as I am walking another girl passes me. I do a double take, because it's like a reflection of myself is walking past me. That can't be my twin sister can it? No way! It was not supposed to be this easy, I thought I would actively have to search for her, not just run into her after my glee club audition. I guess there's only one way to find out. I hide behind the curtains in the wings and wait for her to introduce herself to Aunt Quinn and Aunt Rachel.

"Oh Morgan, we already said you were in, you don't need to audition again" Aunt Rachel says.

"I'm not Morgan, my name's Candice Hantz" she says.

"Sorry, our mistake, you just look exactly like the mirror image of the girl who just auditioned. Are you twins?" she asks.

"I don't think so, what was her name?" she asks.

"Morgan Lopez-Pierce" Aunt Quinn says. I rush onto the stage.

"I think Candice and I have some things to talk about" I say, taking her arm and leading her offstage.

"I think I'm your twin sister" we both say at the same time.

Candice's POV

A knock on the door in the middle of the night wakes me up. I know exactly who it is and I don't want him to come in here, but there's nothing that I can do to stop him, it's not as if I have a lock on my door. The door swings open and my dad walks into my room.

"Hey baby" he says, sitting on my bed.

"Just get it over with" I say closing my eyes. I feel his tongue in my mouth, his hands pulling my pyjama top off, and touching my breasts. I feel horrible, disgusting and wrong, all I want to do is push him off me, tell him to leave me alone, but I can't. I know he'll hurt me if I do. I'm not concentrating on what he's doing to me now; I'm remembering what he did to me when I was 12.

Flashback

"WHAT?" I hear my dad yelling from downstairs.

"She said that she doesn't want to see us, Marcus. She doesn't want to come live with us, she doesn't want to meet us, and she doesn't even want to call us" Mom says.

"What about Candice? Will she meet Candice?" he asks.

"She doesn't know about Candice, Marcus. Santana and Brittany never told her, just like we asked them to. Can you blame her for hating us? We did give her up for adoption" she says.

"We made a mistake! And now those bitches have our daughter, and she would rather stay with them than her own family!" Dad yells.

"Santana and Brittany raised her; to her they are her family. We've done everything we can Marcus, we have to let her come to us" Mom says.

"Well she's obviously never going to do that" Dad says and I hear his footsteps storming upstairs.

"What are you doing?" Mom asks.

"None of your damn business!" he shouts and I hear a smack as Dad slaps Mom's face. His footsteps get louder and louder as he makes his way closer to my room and I find myself ducking under the covers on my bed as a way of hiding.

"Your bitch of a sister rejected our very kind offer to come and live with us again, and you know what that means" Dad says, yanking the covers from over my head.

"No" I say firmly.

"You don't have a choice Cand-Bi, you have to do as I say" he says.

"No I don't" I say.

"Yes you do" he says pushing me back onto the bed. He presses down on my wrists so hard I want to scream. He pulls my favourite shirt off and I use the minute that his hands aren't clamped around my wrists to punch him in the nose. This angers him more and he ties my hands to the bed frame with his scarf. He rips off my bra, and starts to suck on my nipples. I kick out at him, trying to get him off me but he won't. He starts to trail kisses down my stomach. I scream; trying to attract Mom's attention but no one comes.

"What did you do to her?" I ask.

"She might have got knocked out when she fell, I don't know. Shut up, I don't like talk during" he says. I keep kicking at him, but he doesn't seem to care. He sticks his fingers into my underwear and then inside me. I feel like I'm going to be sick in my mouth, as he fingers me. I keep kicking him, aiming for his wrists but it's hard to get a good aim when he's doing what he's doing. I shut my eyes and start to count, I used to do that when I was younger, whenever he'd come into my room and do this. I figured that when I stopped counting, he'd be done. When I make it to 50, I open my eyes, and he's unzipping his pants.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"I'm ramping it up a notch" he says.

"NO! This is all you get" I say.

"I'll take whatever I want, you ungrateful bitch" he says. He pulls off his pants, and then his briefs, and then his shirt. He moves in closer to me, and then forces his dick inside my mouth.

"SUCK!" he yells into my ear. I can't say anything, so I do as he says, moving my mouth up and down, feeling the slick, sticky cum in my mouth. I pull myself away and throw up down the side of my bed.

"You disgust me" he says and he pulls my skirt off, and rips my underwear. He smashes my head against the back of my bed, and I feel dizzy, blood trickling down from my forehead. He starts to blur in front of me, and I'm not very aware of what's happening anymore. He forces himself inside me, and I'm vaguely aware of blood trickling down my legs and a strong sensation of pain, and of fighting the need to throw up again. I don't know how long it goes on for, I feel like I'm drifting, like I'm watching this happen to me from above, but I'm not really there. I've stopped struggling, too weak to fight him off anymore. Eventually the pain stops, and I feel him slipping out of me. I throw up again, all over my covers.

"It's been a pleasure, bitch" he says, slamming my head against the back of the bed again, hard enough so that I pass out.

End of flashback

When I open my eyes, he's still there, moaning in pleasure as he moves up and down inside me. I lie there, cold, numb and unfeeling, counting in my head and waiting until it's over. I don't even struggle anymore there's no point and I find that the less I struggle the less painful it is.

He pulls away from me eventually, and kisses me on the lips, although I don't return the kiss. He leans in towards my ear.

"This is our little secret remember, it's just for us. We don't tell your mom what we do" he whispers.

"I promise" I whisper back, a well-choreographed, well-rehearsed dance by now. I know exactly what I need to say and what I need to do to get him to leave my room. He picks up his clothes, quickly dresses and then quietly leaves the room.

I slip into the en-suite attached to my bedroom and pull my pyjamas back on. I look in the mirror, tracing the line of the scar that runs from the top of my forehead down my cheek. 23 stitches I had to have after that night when I was 12, and the scar remains as a permanent reminder. I turn the taps on, as I always do, and then I throw myself onto the floor, sobbing into the shower mat.

I wake up still on the bathroom floor, after probably having spent most of the night crying. I get up, wiping my eyes with a tissue. I must have remembered to turn the taps off before I went to sleep, otherwise I'd probably be floating by now. I undress, and quickly shower, washing the horrible scent of my father's sweat off myself, although no matter how much I wash, I never feel completely clean. After about 20 minutes in the shower, I jump out, and dry myself before going to my room to get dressed.

My clothes are preppy; I wanted to have a different style to other people at school, something that was distinctively mine. I choose a pink polo shirt, a pleated lilac tennis skirt with a pair of tights underneath, a white blazer on top, a pair of pink ballet flats, pearl earrings and my beige tote bag. Once I have picked out my clothes, I grab my curling iron and go to the bathroom, and turn it on. Whilst I'm waiting for the iron to heat up, I grab a book from my bookshelf. It's our assigned book for English this semester; we're doing dystopian novels, so our class has been assigned The Hunger Games. I'm really enjoying it; it's just my kind of book, lots of action. I'm not looking forward to our Junior Year assignment as we have to do a John Green book and I'm not all that keen on those. I get through a chapter of my book, and then my curling iron has heated up. I don't completely curl my hair; I just curl it into soft waves rather than ringlets.

Breakfast in the morning is always my least favourite time of the day. I have to sit with my mom and dad and pretend that my dad didn't do what he did last night. Ten years I've had to pretend that my dad doesn't come into my room, touch me, kiss me, make me have sex with him and I'm pretty tired of it. I hate them, both of them, my mom and my dad. My dad is pretty obvious, but I hate my mom too because she must know. She cannot possibly not know where my dad goes when he sneaks out of their room at night, and yet she does nothing to stop him, and every morning we end up here, pretending that there's nothing wrong and that we're all one big happy family. I'm almost resentful of Morgan, because if she had agreed to come back and live with us then none of this would ever have happened to me. I don't blame her though, her adoptive moms are probably much nicer than my parents (well I guess they're our parents but she doesn't think of them like that and why should she? They gave her up) so why would she want to come and live with us? When she has a great life, and lovely siblings, and parents who really love her, why would she give all that up? I guess I'm just slightly envious (well more than slightly) that she was the one they gave up and she got to have a better life than I have.

I walk downstairs, where to my surprise (and delight), my dad is not there, just my mom making porridge.

"Hi sweetheart" she says when she sees me.

"Hey Mom. Where's Dad?" I ask.

"He had an early meeting to go to, so I made him breakfast earlier. I think he's a little upset, Morgan keeps blowing us off" she says.

"Why can't you guys just leave her alone? Let her live her life in peace. She obviously doesn't want to meet you guys, so why can't you just let it go?" I say.

"It's your dad honey, I've told him a million times that we can't force her to see us if she doesn't want to and that we should leave her be, but you know what he's like. Once he has an idea in his head he won't let it go until he's got what he wants" she says.

"Yes I know exactly what he's like" I say. The uncomfortable look on her face tells me that she knows what I'm talking about. I don't push it any further, but I do like watching her squirm. She knows what he does to me and she doesn't do anything to stop it so she deserves to squirm at least a little.

"So I'm not sure what I can do to stop him, the texts he sends from his phone are his own business. I'm sure that eventually he'll realise that it's pointless to try and convince her to come back here, but until then, there's nothing that I can do" she says.

I want to retort back that there's always nothing she can do, but I don't want to get into a fight with her, so I don't say anything, I just take my seat at the kitchen table and wait for her to finish making the porridge. When she does, she brings the porridge over along with a pot of jam and places them in front of me on the table.

"Just the way you like it" she says. She gets a bottle of maple syrup from the cupboard and squeezes some out onto her own porridge. I spoon some jam into mine and mix it in.

"So how's school going?" she asks, picking a subject we both know is safe. We only have certain topics we can talk about, talking about my dad or Morgan is usually off limits, and she was the one who brought it up this morning. Usually we only talk about school, and my dance lessons, and the TV shows we watch. My mom and I aren't at all close, we never have been. She probably wishes that I was the daughter she'd given up, rather than Morgan.

"It's fine, I'm doing good in all my classes" I say.

"And extra-curriculars? Are you doing anything this year?" she asks.

"I heard that Mrs Hudson and Mrs Puckerman are starting up a Glee Club at school, so I think I might join. I mean I like to sing and I like to dance so it might be good for me" I say.

"That sounds like a good idea. Do you know if Morgan's joining?" she asks.

"How would I know? Morgan Lopez-Pierce has no idea who I am, we don't speak to each other, we don't know each other, and we're basically strangers. I have no idea whether she likes that sort of thing or not" I say.

"I'm sure she does, her moms are very into that sort of thing, after all Brittany is a choreographer and Santana's a ballet teacher, so they've probably passed on their interests to her" Mom says.

"Maybe" I reply.

"This could be a chance for the two of you to meet, get to know each other. Maybe you could persuade her that coming home wouldn't be so bad" she says.

"For starters, it's all your fault that we don't know each other before now, you were the one who gave her up and made sure that her parents wouldn't tell her about me, and secondly, there is no way in hell that I'm going to do that, they are her family Mom and she's not going to leave them, no matter what I say" I say.

"But we're her family too" she says.

"Blood doesn't always make a family Mom" I say. I don't explicitly say that our family is perfect example of that, but judging by the face she makes, I think she got the underlying message. The two of us finish eating our breakfast in silence and then as soon as I'm done, I practically sprint out of the door. I can't drive yet, but I hate spending time in the car with my mom, so even though my house is basically on the other side of Lima to McKinley, I rollerblade the hour there and back every day so I can avoid my mom. Rollerblading might seem weird, it would probably be more practical to cycle, but I've been doing it since I was a little kid and I love it. I arrive at school just in the nick of time as the buzzer goes to signal the start of first period. I grab my Chemistry textbook from my locker, replace my rollerblades with my shoes and then run to the Chem lab, making it there just five minutes before my teacher does. I take my seat next to Tami White, and quickly get all of my stuff in order before my teacher arrives.

The day passes pretty slowly from there, just an average school day. I'm not that keen on school, aside from English, the one lesson I truly love. After lunch I have a free period, so after I've done some homework, I grab my rollerblades from my locker and walk over to the auditorium.

When I arrive there is another girl already auditioning, so I wait in the wings for her to be finished. The girl's pretty good, and I love Hannah Montana, judge me all you want, but that show was actually pretty cool. Not as good as CSI which is like my favourite show ever, but still pretty cool. I can't really see her very well, standing where I am in the wings though.

Mrs Puckerman and Mrs Hudson talk to her for a little bit before she walks off stage. She walks past me and I swear it's like staring into a mirror. That can't be Morgan, can it? It can't be, but it has to be, there's no one else in the world that looks exactly like me. I shrug it off, and walk onto the stage anyway.

"Oh, Morgan we already said you were in, you don't need to audition again" Mrs Hudson says.

"I'm not Morgan, my name's Candice" I say.

"Sorry, our mistake, you just look exactly like the mirror image of the girl who just auditioned. Are you twins?" she asks.

"I don't think so, what was her name?" I ask.

"Morgan Lopez-Pierce" Mrs Puckerman says.

Morgan rushes onto stage, and says "I think Candice and I have some things to talk about" before dragging me off.

"I think I'm your twin sister" we both say at the same time. Neither of us speaks for a few minutes, both in shock of the fact that we've found each other. I honestly thought that I was never going to meet Morgan and now here she is, standing right in front of me.

"I can't believe it's you. My mom only told me that you existed this morning and now here you are in front of me" she says, giving me a hug.

"I'm not really sure what to say. What do you say to your long lost twin sister who you've never met before?" I ask.

"I'm not entirely sure" she says and we both laugh.

"Are you okay Candice? Do you still want to audition?" Mrs Hudson calls.

"You should go audition. We can talk after" she says.

"Wait here for me?" I ask.

"Of course" she says. I walk back onto the stage.

"Is everything okay? We understand if you'd want to reschedule, we can make a special exception given the circumstances" Mrs Puckerman says.

"No it's fine, I'd like to audition now" I say.

"What will you be auditioning with?" Mrs Hudson asks.

"Girls Just Wanna Have Fun, by Cyndi Lauper" I say.

"That's a great song, let's hear it" she says. I quickly switch out my shoes for my rollerblades and skate over to the other side of the stage to give my backing track to the tech guy. I skate back, nod to him that I'm ready to start and then start my song, skating around as I do so, performing cartwheels, handstands and somersaults.

Candice:

I come home in the morning light

My mother says when you gonna live your life right

Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones

And girls they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have fun

The phone rings in the middle of the night

My father yells what you gonna do with your life

Oh daddy dear you know you're still number one

But girls they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have

That's all they really want

Some fun

When the working day is done

Girls-they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have fun

Some boys take a beautiful girl

And hide her away from the rest of the world

I want to be the one to walk in the sun

Oh girls they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have

That's all they really want

Some fun

When the working day is done

Girls-they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have fun

They want to have fun,

They want to have fun…..

I finish the routine by doing the splits, and clapping my hands once above my head. "So what did you think?" I ask, when I get up.

"I think you're a very talented performer Candice, it must run in the family. You and Morgan are twins aren't you?" Mrs Hudson says.

"Uh, yes we are. Newly acquainted" I say.

"As in just met today?" Mrs Puckerman asks.

"Yeah, that would be about right" I say. "So am I in or not? Or can't you tell me?" I ask.

"You're in; we could use someone with your talents. We'll be posting a full list on Friday, but that's really more so that everyone can find out who all the other members are. The meeting is on Friday, at four, in the choir room, so don't be late" Mrs Hudson says.

"Thank you, I'm really looking forward to it" I say smiling. I skate off the stage, where Morgan is still waiting for me.

"Rollerblades?" she asks.

"I've been skating since I was a little kid, I skate to and from school every day and I'm pretty well practiced at dancing in skates by now" I say.

"Can you teach me? I've always wanted to learn how, but never had the chance to" she says.

"Sure, maybe we could go to the park on Saturday" I say.

"That would be great" she says smiling.

"You still have some time before your next class right?" I ask.

"Yeah, a little bit. You want to go somewhere and talk?" she asks.

"And try to catch up 15 years in 30 minutes? Sounds great" I say. We start to walk over to the library together.

"So what are Mom and Dad like?" she asks.

"I thought you didn't want to meet them" I say.

"I don't, I'm perfectly happy with my moms but I just want to know what your life with them is like" she says.

"Our relationship is kind of strained, and if you don't mind, that's all I'd like to say about it right now" I say.

"Okay, well do you want to know about my moms? And Lexi, and Brant?" she says.

"Sure that would be great" I say.

"Well my mom, that's Brittany, is a choreographer, she's sweet, a little…I think the right word is kooky, but she's a great Mom, kind and caring, and we have a lot of fun together. My Mami Santana is lovely too, stricter than my mom but she's the firm but fair type. She teaches ballet. Lexi's my sister, she's very type A, organised, involved in almost every single club there is at this school, but she's great, really bubbly and a lot of fun to be around. Brant's my brother, he's a swimmer, he can be a little abrasive sometimes, but most of the time he's pretty friendly. He'll always stand up for me, he's very protective and we kind of tease each other, you know just an ordinary sibling relationship" she says.

"No wonder you never wanted to come back to us, your family sounds wonderful" I say, jealous that she has amazing moms and siblings whilst I have no siblings (aside from her and she doesn't live with me) and awful parents.

"If I'd known about you before now, I swear I would have sought you out. My mom literally only told me this morning and she blabbed by mistake" she says.

"Well we're here now right?" I say.

"Yeah we are" she says smiling. "So aside from rollerblading, what are you into?" she asks.

"Well obviously I like to sing, and dance too. Umm I love playing Fighting Games, Mortal Kombat, Trekken, Street Fighter, that sort of thing" I say.

"No kidding, me too. I was up until like two last night playing Street Fighter" she says.

"Well we'll have to play together sometime" I say. "I also love Horror movies; and CSI" I add.

"Me too! What's your favourite film?" she asks.

"Is it wrong to say Rocky Horror? I know it's a musical horror comedy rather than a straight horror but I love it" I say.

"That is a great movie, although I have to say my personal favourite is Dracula" she says.

"You have good taste" I compliment.

"So CSI, favourite character?" she asks.

"Sara Sidle I love her. How about you?" I say.

"Morgan Brody, her chemistry with Greg is immense" she says.

"Okay, so books? Love them or loathe them?" I ask.

"Oh my god, love. I like a whole range of things, but my favourites are still the Sherlock Holmes stories. There is something incredibly sexy about a guy that smart" she says.

"I totally agree. Which one's your favourite story?" I ask.

"A Scandal In Bohemia, I love him and Irene Adler, she's the only one who seems to be able to match his intelligence" she says.

"I like that one too, although my favourite is The Adventure of The Empty House, where he comes back and explains how he faked his death. What do you think of the TV show?" I say.

"It's pretty good, and Benedict Cumberbatch was so gorgeous when he was younger, but I prefer the movies. I just love the old Victorian setting, and Robert Downey Jr was just hot!" she says.

"Some people say our dad looks like Robert Downey Jr" I say.

"Our dad's hot?" she asks.

"Well I'm not sure it's entirely appropriate for you to think of him like that, but if you asked the women at his work who seem to fawn over him, then I think they'd say so" I say.

"So speaking of boys, do you have a boyfriend? Or girlfriend? I don't just assume that you could only have a boyfriend" she says.

"Well I appreciate that, but no, I don't have either. Yet, anyway, Sierra Hummel-Anderson set me up with some girl named Sydney Lawson, do you know her?" I say.

"Sydney? Yeah she goes to my Mami's ballet classes, she seems sweet enough, but I haven't had an extended conversation with her, the most I know about her is that she's English" she says.

"Ooh that's great, English accents are so sexy!" I say, winking at her, and making her laugh. "So how about you? Any boyfriend? Or girlfriend?" I ask.

"Just a crush actually, although my friend Clara doesn't think I should go out with him, she says he's a bad guy and that he'll hurt me, but I don't think so" she says.

"Well who is he?" I ask.

"Jackson Avery" she says.

"Well since I've only just met you, I'm not really in any place to tell you what you should or shouldn't do, but I have heard that he's a bit of a playboy, so just be careful okay" I say.

"I will be, but he honestly doesn't seem as bad as Clara seems to think he is" she says.

"That's what makes a good playboy, girls think he's harmless until they're the ones who've had their heart broken" I say.

"Well he seemed nice enough to me" she says.

"I'm not saying you shouldn't date him Morgan, just be careful, alright?" I say.

"Alright. You can call me Mo okay, all my family does" she says and I smile, glad that she's comfortable enough to call me family already.

"You can call me Candi, everyone does" I reply.

"Okay" she says. "So how come you joined Glee Club?" she asks.

"I want be signed to a record label someday" I say.

"Me too" she says smiling. "Maybe we could get signed as a sister duo" she adds.

"That would be cool" I say. "So where were we? Musical idol?" I ask

"Easy June Carter" she says.

"No way!" I say.

"Why?" she asks.

"Mine is Johnny Cash" I say.

"That is so perfect! We are going to have so much fun singing duets in Glee Club together" she says.

"So aside from Glee Club, what else do you do for extra-curriculars?" I ask.

"Oh I'm the President of Cinema Club; we watch films each week and discuss them. How about you?" she says.

"Glee's actually the first club I've joined here. I've always wanted there to be one. Wait you don't dance? I would have thought with your moms both being into dancing you would be too" I say.

"Actually neither my brother or sister or I ever got into it. Brant was always more into swimming and Lexi's into almost everything but not dancing. You like to dance though?" she asks.

"Yeah I take lessons at Mike Chang's studio" I say.

"Oh he's a family friend of ours" she says.

"Really?" I ask.

"Yeah, my moms went to high school with him" she says. "So what kind of dance do you like?" she asks.

"A little bit of everything" I say.

"So you never took classes at my Mami's?" she asks.

"No, my parents would never let me" I say.

"A shame, but not exactly unexpected, considering that they asked my moms not to tell me about you. Why do they keep harassing me to come and stay with you guys?" she says.

"Once my dad gets an idea in his head it's stuck there. I can try to talk to him but I doubt he'll listen. For what it's worth, I never asked them to do that" I say.

"I didn't think you would, but if you tried to talk to him I would be really grateful. I mean the number of texts I get a day is bordering on harassment now" she says.

"I'm sorry about him, he's a jerk" I say. We chat for a little longer about books, and movies, and music until the buzzer goes to signal the end of our free period.

"I'll give you my number okay, and then you can text me and we can organise going rollerblading on Saturday" she says.

"I'd love that" I say, giving her a hug. We walk to our lockers together, and then head our separate ways to our different classes.

At the end of the day, I meet Sierra on the steps. She's standing next to a pretty ginger haired girl, wearing a summer dress and tights. She's shorter than me, but not by too much, and her hair is long and flies out behind her in the wind. She's certainly pretty, I'll give her that much.

"Hi, I'm Candice Hantz, but you can call me Candi" I say, stretching my hand out to her.

"I'm Sydney Lawson, but you can just call me Syd" she says. As I expected, her English accent is so sexy.

"So that's everyone acquainted, now let's go, Sydney's going to drive us to the Lima Bean" Sierra says. We walk over to Sydney's car, a little red mini.

"It was my mom's but she gave it to me when I learned to drive. The best thing about moving from England was that I could learn to drive a year earlier, although I honestly don't get why you guys can't drink until 21, you can drink at 18 in England" she says.

"It's a cool car" I say.

"Thanks. So you want to go or what?" she asks. We all get into the car and drive the fifteen minutes from school to The Lima Bean. Sydney seems nice enough, very chatty, incredibly excitable but sweet too.

We go into the coffee shop, and I order for all of us. "What would you guys like?" I ask.

"Mocha Latte" Sierra says.

"Hot Chocolate with whipped cream and marshmallows" Sydney says.

"One Mocha Latte, one hot chocolate with whipped cream and marshmallows, and a green tea please" I say.

We wait by the counter for a few minutes until the barista comes back with our drinks, then we each take our own and walk to a booth in the back.

"So have you joined Glee Club too Sydney?" I ask.

"Yes I have. I love singing, and dancing, and I want to be a star in the West End someday, that's the British version of Broadway" she says.

"I know what it is. What's your favourite show?" I ask.

"The Lion King, it's a great show based on my favourite movie. How about you?" she asks.

"Frozen, I'm so glad they finally made it into a Broadway show, I love that movie" I say.

"You have good taste" she compliments.

"Thank you" I reply. "So Sierra tells me you dance?" I ask.

"Mainly ballet and jazz but I like to do a little bit of everything, since the best training to be a performer, for dancing anyway is to experience as many different dance styles as possible and I'm in McKinley Mixers and we do street and hip-hop dance. How about you?" she says.

"Mostly slow stuff, ballet, contemporary, lyrical, that sort of thing, I love how you can tell a story through that type of dance" I say.

"I love the storytelling and emotional part of dance too, but I also enjoy some of the faster paced stuff, I find it a lot more fun" she says. We talk a little more about dance, she tells me about McKinley Mixers, and we talk about our upcoming exams for ballet.

"So I guess you mainly like theatre music then?" I ask.

"Mostly yeah. What about you?" she asks.

"Well my musical idol is Johnny Cash, so I like quite a bit of country stuff, but I like a lot of different music as well, I wouldn't say I have a specific favourite" I say. "So how long have you lived in Ohio for?" I ask.

"Oh we moved here when I was thirteen. My dad got a new job here, so we all had to move out with him" she says.

"Do you miss England?" I ask.

"Yeah, a lot. London's great, you can't quite match the feel of a big city, and if you tell me it's just like New York, I swear I'm going to scream because London is so much better" she says.

"I wasn't going to say that. I've never been to London, I'd love to go though" I say.

"We go back there all the time, maybe you could come with me and my family one time?" she asks.

"That sounds great" I say.

"So what are your parents like?" she asks.

"We're not that close, and if you don't mind, I don't really like talking about them" I say.

"Of course, I won't make you talk about anyone you don't want to" she says.

"Thanks. So how about your family? What are they like?" I ask.

"My family are great, my mom's an actress, that's why I wanted to go into acting in the first place, but she does movies rather than theatre, and I go to the sets of her movies when school allows me to, have done since I was a little kid. She's the whole reason I got into music in the first place, she's always loved it and she was the one who signed me up to singing and dancing and acting classes. I tell her everything; we're kind of more like best friends than mother and daughter. My dad does something in finance, I'm not entirely sure, I switch off whenever he talks about his job, but he's musical too, he taught me how to play piano. Me and my sister Charlotte, are best friends, we're into all the same things, and she's only a year younger than me, so that kind of helps. I have a younger brother Eric as well but he's kind of a loner, he spends most of his time shut in his room. He's a writer actually, so he's kind of that brooding loner type. He's 12" she says.

"Your family sounds great" I say wistfully, wishing that my family was as good as Sydney's family sounds. Heck anyone's family sounds great compared to my creepy dad, and my uncaring mom.

"They are. So do you have any siblings?" she asks.

"A twin sister, but she was adopted by another family, and I only met her today" I say.

"Wow, I've never met anyone with a long-lost twin before. What's she like?" she asks.

"Well, my family is a little strange. She's nice, she's exactly like me, and it's kind of strange to meet someone who not only looks exactly like you but has almost exactly the same personality as well" I say.

"I always thought it would be cool to have a twin" she says.

"Well I'll let you know" I say smiling. "So other than arts stuff, what else do you like to do?" I ask.

"Well I like to shop, but then again what girl doesn't? I love spending time with my family, umm I do gymnastics as well, and I do horse riding, I love horses" she says.

"Really? Horses have always kind of scared me" I say.

"They're lovely animals, you have to respect them of course, but there's no greater feeling than flying around a course of jumps on the back of a horse" she says. "You should come down to the stables with me and have a go sometime" she says.

"I think I'll pass, but I would like to come and see you ride" I say.

"I'll take that as a victory, okay then, I'd love that" she says. "So what do you like to do, other than singing and dancing?" she asks.

"I like to rollerblade, umm I like playing fighting games, watching horror movies, watching CSI, and reading" I say.

"You like rollerblading too? My sister and I always used to do it in Regent's Park at home" she says.

"Maybe you and your sister could come with me after school one time. I rollerblade to and from school anyway, so we could just take a detour to the park" I say.

"Does that not take you forever?" she asks.

"It takes a while, but I like the time to be alone with my thoughts" I say.

"I understand, that's why I love to ride so much, it's just you and the horse and you have time to just be alone with your thoughts" Sydney says.

"Are you okay Sierra? I'm sorry we've kind of been ignoring you" she says.

"I'm fine, I think I'll just finish my drink, and then call Abby to come and pick me up. You guys seem to be hitting it off, so I think I can safely leave you" she says.

"Are you sure? I can always drive you home if you want" Sydney says.

"No, you should stay and have fun, I was really just here to introduce you guys and I think my job is over, so I'll go and you guys can continue getting to know each other without having to worry about me being a third wheel" she says. She quickly downs the rest of her mocha latte and then says goodbye to us before walking out of the coffee shop.

"You want to try something?" Sydney asks when Sierra is gone.

"What?" I ask.

"Sing with me?" she asks.

"Right here, right now?" I ask.

"Why not?" she asks.

"For one thing, there's no music" I say.

"Learn to live a little, we don't need music or anything else to sing, just our voices. Besides what better way to test if we're actually good together than by singing a duet?" she says.

"Fine, but if this goes totally wrong then I'm blaming you" I say. "What should we sing?" I ask.

"I think I know the perfect song" she says. She whispers it in my ear and I smile. We walk to the front of coffee shop, sitting on stools in front of the counter.

"If we could have everyone's attention please?" Sydney says. Everyone in the shop turns around to face us. "My friend and I would like to sing something for you, and if you enjoy it then a small donation in the hat would be appreciated" she says, taking off her hat.

We look at each other, and she nods at me, signalling that I should start the song.

Candice:

Tale as old as time

True as it can be

Barely even friends

Then somebody bends

Unexpectedly

Sydney:

Just a little change

Small to say the least

Both a little scared

Neither one prepared

Beauty and the beast

Candice:

Ever just the same

Ever a surprise

Ever as before

Ever just as sure

As the sun will rise

Both:

Tale as old as time

Tune as old as song

Bitter sweet and strange

Finding you can change

Learning you were wrong

Certain as the sun

Rising in the east

Tale as old as time

Song as old as rhyme

Sydney:

Beauty and the beast

Candice:

Beauty and the beast

The room erupts in cheers after we finish singing and people come up to put money in Sydney's hat.

"That was great you guys, how long have you been together?" a girl called Amelia asks us from behind the counter.

"This is actually our first date" I say.

"Wow you sound like you've been together a lot longer based on that song" one of the other customers says.

"Well thank you" Sydney says. I kept expecting someone to say something about us being two girls singing together in public and how dare we, but everyone is simply complementary about the song and our voices. We spend a while fielding questions from the excited crowd, including one girl who asks if she can post a video she recorded of us singing on YouTube.

"Sorry guys, we have to go, if I don't get home soon, my mom will kill me" Sydney says. I really don't want to leave; I'm having a lot of fun with Sydney and it's not as if I have anything to look forward to at home, it will just be another night of me shutting myself in my room to avoid my parents. I wish I was 18 already, and could leave home, so I didn't have to put up with them. It might seem harsh, but it's not as if my parents have ever cared about me. It's not like they don't make it obvious that they gave up the wrong daughter.

"Are you sure you want to take me home? My house is probably way out of your way" I say.

"This was a date right?" she says.

"Of course" I reply.

"Then part of the date is me driving you home, no matter how far away your house is" she says.

"Well you're very sweet" I say.

"Hadn't you figured that out yet?" she asks, flicking her hair.

"I think I'm starting to" I say smiling.

"So tell me something" she says.

"What?" I ask.

"Something no one else knows" she says.

I really don't have anything of that type, except for the whole issues with my dad, which I'm not going to talk about on a first date.

"I'm an open book" I say.

"Come on, everyone has secrets" she says.

"Not me" I reply. "How about you? Tell me something about you that no one else knows" I say.

"I'm scared of thunderstorms. My dad crashed our car in one once and they've freaked me out ever since" she says.

"Were you hurt?" I ask.

"A broken arm, that was all, but it really shook me up" she says.

"I can imagine. You seriously haven't told anyone about that?" I ask.

"No, I assume that most people would think I was being a little kid if I said I was scared of thunderstorms" she says.

"I don't" I say.

"Yeah, well you're special" she says.

"Am I?" I ask, batting my eyelashes.

"Yes you are. What do you say we listen to some music?" she asks.

"Sounds good" I say. She turns on her car radio and for the rest of the drive home, we sing along at the tops of our voices. It's the most fun I've had in a long time, Sydney has an amazing ability to help me let loose, which is difficult for me given everything that I've been through with my parents.

Eventually we pull up in front of my house. One of the reasons I wasn't sure about Sydney driving me to my house, aside from the fact that it's far away, is that my house isn't in the best part of town. We live in a rundown little cottage, and although the inside of the house is a lot nicer than the outside, it's still a little embarrassing for Sydney to see where I live.

"Should I check for carjackers?" she jokes. "I'm sorry was that mean? I don't have the best filter" she says.

"Don't worry; I know that I live in a sucky neighbourhood. I'm sure your place is much nicer than mine" I say.

"Yeah it is. Sorry too honest?" she asks.

"No, your honesty is refreshing" I say.

"I had a really great time today" she says.

"Me too" I say.

"Would you like to do it again sometime?" she asks.

"How about rollerblading in the park after school tomorrow?" I suggest.

"Sounds great only I have to bring my sister home, she got picked up by my mom today, but my mom can't pick her up tomorrow" she says.

"Well why not bring her? I'll bring my sister too, she said she wanted to learn to skate, so then no one will end up being left out like Sierra was today" I say.

"It's not exactly a date then is it?" she says, raising her eyebrows.

"Well how about we do that tomorrow and then you come out for dinner with me on Friday?" I ask.

"Sounds like a plan" she says smiling.

"I'll see you tomorrow" I say.

"See you tomorrow" she says and then she leans forward, and kisses me, for several minutes before we both pull away.

"You think that will last you until tomorrow?" she asks, winking.

"Definitely" I say, returning the wink before getting out of the car. I wave her off, before walking inside the house.

My mum is in the kitchen when I walk in. "What do you look so happy about?" she asks.

"Just had a good day that's all" I say.

"You look like you met someone. Did you meet someone?" she asks.

"Blind date" I reply.

"Who were they? Boy or a girl?" she asks.

"Girl" I reply.

"Well what was she like?" she asks.

"Oh please, don't start acting like you care about me and my life now" I say.

"Candi, I do care about you, you're my daughter of course I care" she says.

"If you cared about me even one tiny bit, then you would have stopped what you know has been happening in this house for the past ten years but you don't because you wish, just like dad did that you'd kept your other daughter and given me away, and don't you dare try and deny it because I know it's true" I yell, and storm off before she even has the chance to say anything else, feeling like I should have the last word here. It feels like a relief to finally get these words off my chest. I fling open the door, and collapse onto my bed and cry, but not in sadness, more in anger because I've spent all these years being hurt by my dad, and my mom has known about it all this time. It's not fair, why did this have to happen to me? How can I go from being so happy, to so angry? Why do I always seem to be the victim?

Josh's POV

Flashback

"So have you got everything?" Mom asks me worriedly.

"Yes Mom, I'll be fine. It's just a sleepover, nothing's going to happen. We'll watch movies, we'll talk, we'll eat massive amounts of junk food, and then we'll go to sleep" I say.

"Well if you're having a bad time, you know you can always call me to pick you up, no matter what time it is, I'll be right over" she says.

"I'll be fine Mom, but thanks" I say.

"You sure?" she asks.

"Yes, Mom, I'll be fine. Now go, none of the other kids moms are hanging around, you're embarrassing me" I say. She ruffles my hair and then kisses me on the forehead.

"Have fun okay, sweetheart" she says.

"I will" I reply. I grab my stuff from out the back of the car, and then walk up to the front door and ring the doorbell. Derek (whose house I'm staying at) answers the door.

"Hey Joshie, come on in" Derek says smiling at me. There's something a little off about him, I can't exactly work out what, but he doesn't seem like his normal self.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"I'm fine, we were just wondering when you were going to get here. Everyone else is here already" he says.

"I'm sorry; we got stuck in traffic on the way here. What did I miss?" I ask.

"Well you got here just in time for pizza" he says. All of the guys are sitting around a table in Derek's living room, scoffing down multiple slices of pizza. I reach for a full glass of lemonade but Derek completely freaks out.

"NOT THAT ONE! THAT'S MINE, YOURS IS THE ONE TO YOUR LEFT" Derek yells. I'm not sure why he's so freaked over this, but I shrug and take the other lemonade glass. He takes the one that was closest to me.

We spend the evening, as I told my mom we would, watching movies, talking and eating huge amounts of junk food. Derek keeps offering me lemonade which I find a little strange but I take it anyway. It's only about halfway through the evening when I start to feel a little groggy, and sick that I suspect something is wrong.

"I don't feel good" I mutter.

"Why don't you go lie down? My parents have a really comfortable bed" Derek says. I nod, and stumble up the stairs, only just making it to Derek's parents' room before I throw up, all over their bed. A few minutes later I hear a knock at the door.

"Are you okay Josh?" Derek asks.

"I'm fine" I mumble although I feel terrible. My vision is blurry, I feel sick and dizzy, and like I could pass out any second.

The door opens to reveal Derek and my other friends, all standing there. They walk into the room, and Derek comes over to my side. He helps me up and pulls the soiled sheets off the bed. I am about to thank him, when he pushes me back down onto the bed.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"We're going to have a little fun" he says.

"No!" I yell and I try to push him off but my muscles feel like they've turned to jelly and I don't have enough strength to fight him.

"Fighting it will only make it worse" he says. He forces his tongue inside my mouth, kissing me. I try to kick out with my legs but every time I kick him, he slaps me, hard on the cheek, every time. He tugs off my t-shirt, I try desperately to hold it down so he can't pull it off, but my hands are so shaky that it's not effective and he tugs my shirt off. He grabs my shaking hands and forces me to pull off his shirt too. He unzips my trousers with his teeth. I try to slap his hand away but he punches me in the eye and then just continues anyway. He pulls my trousers down and then my pants, leaving me naked except for my socks which he quickly removes.

"Your turn" he says.

"NO!" I mumble, groggily, but what I hope is firmly. He grabs my left hand twisting my wrist, and making me cry out in pain. He lets go, and growls in my ear "see what happens if you don't do as I say". I bite my lip from the pain that radiates out from my wrist. I gingerly unzip his jeans, and pull them off, then his pants and then his socks.

"Grab it" he says.

"What?" I ask.

"Ugh, do I have to do everything myself?" he sighs. He grabs my right hand and forces me to touch his dick. I shudder as I feel him getting hard against my hand, and pull my hand away as soon as humanly possible. He forces me onto my front and pulls me up onto my knees by my ear. He binds my hands in front of me to the bed, using the sleeves of his t-shirt.

"Stop it!" I cry.

"You'll enjoy it, I promise" he says. I feel his hands on my ass, forcing my asshole to open wider. He licks it, and I cringe. I try to force him off, but seconds later he has jammed his dick in. I scream in pain, as he shoves harder and harder into me. He scrapes his fingernails along my back, as he thrusts, and I cannot do anything about it because I'm tied up. I struggle against the t-shirt that's tying me to the bed, but all that does is encourage him to be even rougher. I look over to my friends, begging them with my eyes to stop him from doing this to me, but no one helps. I feel tears streaming down my face, and although I don't like people seeing me cry, I don't stop them.

I fall asleep eventually, whatever Derek put in my lemonade made me increasingly drowsy, and whether it's from the pain or the drug, I eventually just drift off, only vaguely aware of Derek still pounding into me. When I wake up, Derek and all his cronies are gone, but I am still tied there, naked, and my entire body throbbing. He didn't even bother to untie me before he left. I'm still in his parents' bedroom so I'm not entirely sure where they are, or even if they're here. We've probably been alone all night. I'm guessing that Derek set this whole thing up, most likely with the help of his friends. I wriggle free from the t-shirt that ties me to the bed.

I walk into Derek's parents' bathroom to examine the damage. Derek gave me a black eye, my left wrist is swollen to about twice its normal size, my right wrist is bruised and I have scratches all the way down my back. I can't stand looking at myself, I feel dirty and ugly and disgusting. I throw up into the toilet, although after last night I'm not sure what can be left in my stomach. I quickly dress and call my mom to come and pick me up.

As I am walking down the stairs I run into Derek's mother. "Josh, what were you doing in our room?" she asks, seeing the direction I've come from.

"Oh, I'm sorry about that Mrs Morton, I had a little too much to eat last night and I was feeling sick, so Derek put me to bed in your room" I say.

"That was nice of him. We didn't get in until late last night; both Derek's father and I were at work. Did Aaron take good care of you?" she asks.

"Derek's brother, we asked him to keep an eye on you guys. You didn't think we'd leave a bunch of 11, 12 and 13 year olds alone with just our 13 year old son did you?" she says.

I don't mention that we didn't see Aaron all night, that their son raped me in their bedroom last night, and that he drugged my lemonade.

"No of course not. Aaron was great" I lie, not sure why I'm lying for the guy who hurt me, but not wanting to tell her what her son did to me either. I'm too ashamed and embarrassed to tell anyone what happened last night.

"Did you have a good time last night? Are you okay? You look a little banged up" she says.

"I had a great time, just got knocked around a little playing football, that's all" I say.

"Well I think they're all having breakfast downstairs if you want to join them" Mrs Morton says.

"That's okay Mrs Morton, my mom's coming to pick me up soon" I say.

"Well I hope you had a good time" she says.

"Oh I think you can safely say I'm never going to forget it" I say. She smiles, not realising exactly why I'll never forget the sleepover from hell. I walk pass Mrs Morton, grab my stuff from the living room, and go to wait on the front step for my mom, avoiding Derek and all of the boys who I thought were my friends as much as humanly possible.

My mom finally pulls up outside the house about half an hour after I expected her to arrive.

"Where were you, I've been waiting for you for ages" I say.

"I'm sorry honey, the principal called an emergency meeting at school" she says.

"On Saturday?" I ask.

"That's why it's called an emergency meeting. What happened to you honey? You're a mess" she says. She picks up my left wrist, the one that Derek hurt and I wince in pain.

"Who did this to you?" she asks.

"We were playing football Mom and I got a little banged up" I say.

"Since when do you like football?" she asks.

"The other kids do, I was just going along with them" I say.

"Well we'd better stop at the hospital on the way home, your wrist looks like it could be broken" she says.

"It's fine, I don't need to go to the hospital. It really doesn't hurt that much" I say, not wanting to go to the hospital, and have some doctor probing me about how I really got the injury. I can tell my mom doesn't believe me, and I don't really want to go to the hospital and have the doctor figure out how I really got hurt.

"If you really don't need to go to the hospital, then move your wrist without wincing and then I'll take you home" she says.

I do try to move my wrist, but I can't do it without wincing, it's too painful.

"Right I'm taking you to the hospital and there will be no protests, I'm not letting my son walk around with a possibly broken wrist and not do anything about it" she says.

I spend the rest of the car journey to the hospital staring out the window, and not talking to my mom, hoping and praying that the doctor doesn't work out what really happened to me because there's no way that I'm going to tell anyone.

End of flashback

I wake up completely soaked in sweat. I can never sleep fully through the night without having nightmares about that night. I never told anyone about it, I didn't think anyone would believe me, after all you don't exactly hear of guys being raped very often. Girls, sure, but guys, no, according to the media, we're the evil rapists; we can't possibly be a victim. I know that I'm not going to get back to sleep now, so I walk down the hallway to the bathroom. I strip my clothes off and jump in the shower, washing myself all over with soap. It's become kind of an obsession of mine over the past few years; I spend a lot of time cleaning myself. I guess it's probably to do with what Derek did to me; I constantly have to try to clean myself because I always feel dirty. I'm in the shower for about an hour, trying to wash the sweat off myself. When I get out of the shower, the sweat is gone, but I still feel disgusting. I spent a lot of time afterward trying to work out why Derek did what he did to me, and I came to the conclusion that he must have done it because I'm a bad person, so I deserved what he did to me, and so I became the person that he thought I was. I don't want to be like this, I was a nice person before all this happened to me, I was quiet, but fun to be around, and friendly. Now I hang out with the bad kids at school, and I get angry at people, and I do all sorts of things that I shouldn't. I hate this person, I hate myself, but I can't find a way to get back to who I was before. Derek broke something inside of me and I'm not sure how to fix it.

I quickly dry myself off, and then walk back into my room, to get changed. It's still the middle of the night, but I figure if I'm not going to get back to sleep then I may as well get dressed. I pull on a pair of jeans, a red tank top, my Alexander McQueen biker jacket, my black Timberland boots and my black snapback cap and a pair of fingerless gloves. I turn the light on in my room, and take my copy of Beautiful Creatures off my bookshelf. I sit down on my bed and start to read. I love Beautiful Creatures, and I feel like I relate to Ethan a lot. That's one thing that hasn't changed since the incident with Derek happened, I still love to read. I like to escape to different worlds, away from my life and into the lives of other people.

The hours seem to fly by as I am reading, and by the time my mother calls me for breakfast, I have started on Beautiful Darkness, having finished Beautiful Creatures already. I ignore her, wanting to finish the chapter that I'm reading.

"JOSHUA PUCKERMAN! GET DOWNSTAIRS NOW & BRING YOUR SISTER WITH YOU!" my mother calls.

I groan, but since my mom never yells unless she's really mad, I decide to put my book down and walk down the hall to Leigh's room. I knock on the door.

"Leigh! Mom wants us downstairs for breakfast" I say. I hear her talking to someone, and fumbling around for her clothes. Curious as to who she's talking to, I fling the door open, to find my sister, half naked, standing with a shirtless guy, who seems vaguely familiar. It takes me a few minutes to work out who he is.

"Niko?" I ask.

"Okay, I'm going to go" he says. My sister throws him his shirt, and he pulls it on, before climbing out of the window.

"What the hell?" I ask.

"Look Josh, you can't tell Mom and Dad about Niko" she says.

"I was right, you really do have a secret boyfriend" I say.

"Yes, I have a secret boyfriend, emphasis on the secret" she says.

"Well I might just have to tell mom and dad….unless….." I say.

"Unless what?" she asks.

"You tell me where my cigarettes are. Mom confiscated them, and I need them back" I say.

"You realise that smoking is terrible for you right?" she asks.

"No cigarettes; and I will tell mom and dad about your secret boyfriend" I say.

"Fine, your cigarettes are in the top drawer of mom's dresser. Happy?" she says.

"Ecstatic, thank you. Your secret boyfriend will remain secret until you decide to reveal his existence to our parents" I say.

"Thank you" she replies.

"So how long have you been going out with Dancer boy?" I ask.

"Since last year" she says.

"A whole year, wow big sis, I'm impressed that you haven't told Dad yet, since you tell him everything" I say.

"I'm just as capable of keeping a secret as you are, I wouldn't be surprised if you have a secret boyfriend too given how much you sneak out of here" she says.

"I do not have a secret boyfriend, and what my friends and I do outside of school is none of your business" I say.

"Okay JR, I was just saying that you're not really one to talk about keeping secrets" she says. She's right of course, even more than she knows.

"Does Dancer boy treat you right? Because if he doesn't then I will have to beat him up" I say.

"He's great, honestly. He treats me with kindness and respect and he's a really great guy" she says.

"Good. For what it's worth Leigh, I don't think Dad would be mad that you're dating Niko, he likes Niko. He'll be mad that you kept it from him, but he'll get over it. You're daddy's little girl, you can do no wrong" I say.

"Thanks Josh" I say hugging him.

"So you're not going to tell anyone?" she confirms.

"A deal's a deal, you told me where my cigarettes are, I won't tell anyone about your dancer boy" I say.

"Are you seriously going to call him dancer boy? I'm not sure he'd like that, and I know you said you'd beat him up if he didn't respect me, but he'd just as likely beat you up if he heard you calling him that" she says.

"Which is why I'm never going to say it to his face" I say, making her laugh.

"We'd better go downstairs" she says. We both walk out of her room and she heads downstairs, whilst I go into Mom and Dad's room and get my cigarettes out of her drawer, before heading downstairs too.

Mom places a plate of pancakes in front of each of us. "So Quinn told me that you auditioned for Glee Club Leigh?" she says.

"Yeah I did, Aunt Quinn and Aunt Rachel want me to help choreograph some of our routines after they saw the routine I did with my audition song" she says.

"What about you Josh? Are you going to join Glee?" Mom asks.

"No way, my friends would never let me live that down. I get enough stick for the fact that I'm in Poetry Club, without adding Glee Club to that too" I say.

"But you'd like it, you love to sing and dance almost as much as your sister does" she says.

"But I said I'm not going to do it Mom, so can we just stop talking about it and leave it there!" I yell.

"Marley, just leave him be, if he doesn't want to join Glee Club then he's under no obligation to" Dad says.

"Are you not going to tell him off for talking to me like that?" Mom asks.

"Junior, apologise for yelling at your mother" he says.

"Sorry, Mom" I say, reluctantly.

"So how is school going Josh?" she asks.

"The same as it was going yesterday, school doesn't really change much Mom" I say. After that, I don't really talk much, Leigh chatters on and on about school and dance, and the photographs that she's been taking in photography club. There's not exactly much I can say about what I do at school, I can't tell my parents that I skip classes and smoke under the bleachers with my friends. I can't tell them about the poetry I write, because most of my poems are about my feelings about Derek, and about how much I hate myself.

"Are you going over to the studio today Leigh?" Dad asks her.

"Yeah, I've got to do ballet practice before school" she says.

"Can you drop your brother off at school first? McKinley's not exactly on route to my school" Mom says.

"But Mom, school doesn't start until 8.30 and it's only 7.30 now" I complain.

"Plus, if I drop Josh off at school then I won't be able to get as much practice in and there's not long until the exam now, so I need to get in as much practice as I can. Can't one of you take him?" Leigh asks.

"I can take him" Dad says.

"Thanks Dad" I say. I much prefer car rides with Dad than with Mom; Mom tries to force me to talk, whereas Dad just lets me be. Until the end of breakfast we all sit quietly in an awkward silence, and as soon as Leigh's finished, she rushes back upstairs to get her stuff, before leaving for the dance studio.

"So Junior, when do you want to leave?" Dad asks.

"There's another 45 minutes until school starts, and it only takes 15 minutes to get there" I say.

"Okay, we'll leave at 8.15 then. Make sure you're ready though, I have a class that starts at 9 and if I don't get you to school until 8.30, then I won't be able to get to the studio on time" he says. I am walking up the stairs when I overhear Mom and Dad talking, and wanting to know if they are talking about me.

"Aren't you worried about him?" Mom asks.

"You know I am Marley, but he's probably just going through a phase, all kids go through the mean and moody stage during their teenage years" Dad says.

"But he used to be such a nice kid and then suddenly out of nowhere, he's mouthing off to me, he's sneaking off in the middle of the night, he's smoking, he's skipping class Finn told me, do you blame me for being worried?" she asks.

"No, but I really don't think he's bad Marls, he's just an insecure kid who's using the bad boy thing as an act. Trust me, I know, I did it for years" he says.

"I just don't want him falling in with the wrong crowd, Leigh's told me about the kids he hangs around with, and they sound like a scary bunch. I don't want him falling into drugs or alcohol or anything like that" Mom says.

"He won't Marley, he's a sensible kid" Dad says.

"He already smokes" she points out.

"But in the scheme of things, he could be doing much worse things than smoking" he says.

"I'm just worried about him. He reminds me too much of you sometimes" she says.

"Why is that a bad thing? Him reminding you of me?" Dad says with a slight undertone of anger in his voice.

"I didn't mean it like that. I meant he reminds me of the guy you were when we met in high school, the angry, rebellious kid that you were then and it scares me, that's all" she says.

"He'll grow out of it Marley, I'm sure. He's a sweet kid underneath, I know he is" I say.

"I'm not so sure" she says.

"He is Marley, just give him a chance. He's 14, he's just taking some time and figuring out who he is" Dad says.

"What if I don't like who he ends up becoming?" she asks.

"You will, Marley, he's your son" Dad says. I've heard enough, I don't like them talking about me like this, behind my back. I kick the door hard, and then run back upstairs to my bedroom. My mom got me a punching bag as a way of taking my anger out on something safely, so I start to throw punches at it. It takes about fifteen minutes of punching the bag before I feel calmer, and then I sit back on my bed, continuing to read Beautiful Darkness until my dad calls me to go to school.

I get into the passenger side of my dad's Land Rover, and neither of us speaks for the first few minutes of our drive to school.

"Are we going to talk about the conversation you overheard this morning, Junior?" Dad asks me.

"What's to say? Mom hates me and you think I'll grow out of my personality" I say.

"Your mom didn't mean that, and as for what I said, I know that this isn't you Josh. You're not a troublemaker, you're not mean, you're not….." he says.

"You?" I suggest filling in the blank. "Is there anything wrong with being like you?" I ask.

"No, there's nothing wrong with that, but I don't want you to have my bad traits, I want you to have my good traits, the dancing, the musical ability, those things, not the bad boy traits" he says.

"What if I like who I am now?" I ask.

"I think we both know that you don't. What happened to the sweet, shy, eleven year old who used to spend all of his time reading, and who loved his mom?" he asks.

"He grew up" I snap. I want to be that kid again I do, but I can't find my way back there. That kid was the kid that got raped, so if being the guy I am now stops that from happening, then I would rather be me as I am now.

"I don't believe that. I think there's something bigger going on here, and I want you to tell me what it is" he says.

"Well too bad because I don't want to. Besides aside from hanging out with a different crowd, I still like the same stuff, I still read, I still write poetry, I still sing, I still dance, I still like the same TV shows, so I really don't see what the problem is here" I say.

"The problem is that you smoke, you sneak out of the house, you disrespect your mother, you skip classes, and you get into fights, and that attitude cannot keep going" he says.

"But you said this morning that it was just a phase and I would grow out of it" I say.

"I meant what I said, but I also mean this, I don't want you getting kicked out of school for this behaviour" he says.

"It's not like school even matters for me, I want to be an actor, and you don't need a degree for that" I say.

"It's important to me and your mother that you finish high school" he says.

"And what are you going to do if I do get into fights or disrespect mom, or skip classes or sneak out of the house?" I ask.

"Then there will be serious repercussions Joshua and don't think I don't mean that because I do" he says.

My dad keeps asking me questions the rest of the way to school, but I refuse to answer. I've learned over the years that the only person you can trust with your secrets is yourself.

"You know you can tell me anything right Josh?" Dad asks me as we pull into the school parking lot.

"I know Dad" I say, even though I know that's a lie.

"How about I see if your mom will take Leigh out tonight and you and I can have a guy's night?" he asks.

"Can this guy's night include watching America's Next Top Model?" I ask.

"Does it have to?" Dad asks sighing.

"Pretty please?" I ask.

"Fine, America's Next Top Model it is. That must be the strangest guy's night ever" he says.

"We could always watch a James Bond Movie instead, if you'd prefer that" I say.

"How about we do America's Next Top Model then a Bond Movie? I could order a pizza for us" he says.

"NO!" I scream.

"What's wrong Junior?" he asks, confused at my sudden outburst. I've never been able to drink Lemonade or eat pizza, or ice cream, or popcorn or any of the things we ate that night at Derek's house, because it reminds me of that night.

"Nothing" I say, shaking my head.

"Are you sure?" he asks.

"Yes I'm fine. Look could we just order Chinese food instead, I really don't feel like pizza" I say.

"Sure, okay, Junior" he says. I give him a hug and say goodbye, before walking over to the bleachers where all my friends are hanging out. The stoners and other addicts hang out here as well, but they take one set of bleachers whilst we take another.

"Smoke?" my friend Jason offers me, but I take my own packet out of my pocket and wave them in the air.

"How did you manage to get those off your mom?" he asks.

"Let's just say my sister and I made a deal and she told me where they were" I say.

"What did you have to do in exchange?" he asks.

"Now that my friend is a secret" I say, taking my lighter out of my pocket.

"Your mom sounds like such a tight ass dude" one of my other friends Laurie says.

"She's a little uptight, seems to think that you guys are a bad influence on me" I say.

"Does she not get that's the point?" Jason asks and we all laugh, and then take a drag of our cigarettes.

"So any of you want to go out tonight? We could grab our fake ID's and head out to a bar?" Laurie says.

"I have plans with my Dad, we haven't spent a night just the two of us in ages" I say.

"Okay so Puckerman's out, what about the rest of you?" Jason asks. Some of the guys agree, but a couple of them are still grounded from the last time we went out together. We stand there smoking, even after the buzzer that signals lessons goes. None of us tend to show up for class very often, since the whole attending class thing doesn't go with the rebel attitude. I never used to be like this, I used to like going to school but the old attitude doesn't go with the new me.

We stand there under the bleachers for about an hour, chatting about the movies we've seen recently, and the TV shows that we've enjoyed watching in the past week, whilst puffing through several cigarettes each.

"Guys" Laurie comes running over to us, puffing as he's out of breath (and not very fit since he's a fifteen-a-day smoker). I hadn't even noticed that he'd gone.

"What's up?" I ask.

"Mrs Lynn, she's doing the rounds and she's coming over here, we have to hide" he says. We all quickly put out our cigarettes and hide under the bleachers. The click of Mrs Lynn's heels gets closer and we pack tighter together. It's no use though, as soon as she comes near the bleachers, she notices us. I swear she's got like super human vision or something, there's nothing she doesn't miss.

"Next time, pick a better hiding place boys" she says, dragging each of us out by the collars of our shirts.

"How did you know we were here?" I ask.

"Seriously? You don't think after working at this school for so long that I don't know where the kids sneak off to skip class and have a smoke?" she says.

"We were hoping not" Laurie says.

"And you probably need to try and be a more subtle lookout. Hand them over" she says.

"Hand what over?" I ask, feigning innocence.

"Your cigarettes, unless those smoking stubs are from something else, I'd say it's a safe bet you have them" she says.

I can't believe I only just got back my fags from my mom and now I have to hand them in all over again. I reluctantly hand over the packet from my jacket pocket, and the rest of my friends follow suit.

"Come on you lot, it looks like I'm going to have to take you to Principal Hudson's office, and he is not going to be happy to see the six of you again" she says. We follow her inside and down the hall to Uncle Finn's office. She knocks on the door.

"Come in" he calls.

"Finn, I have your favourite six people with me, I caught them skipping class and smoking again" she says.

He groans and then says "Send them in". She steps aside, and we walk into his office, some of us slouching into the chairs on the other side of his desk, the rest of us standing.

"Why is it always you six? I've seen the six of you more in the past week than most of the seniors in this school over the past four years that they've been here" he says.

"I guess we're just not very good at not getting caught" Jason says.

"Well frankly I am sick of seeing you repeatedly for the same offences. Laurie, Jason, Adam, Marshall and Carl, I've been seeing the five of you almost every day since you started here last year for skipping classes, and this is your last chance. The next time I see the five of you in here for the same offence you will all be up for expulsion. The same rules apply to you as to everyone else and whether you like it or not, you are required to be here until you turn 18. You will all be given a week's suspension and two weeks' worth of after school detentions after that. Now please leave and call your parents to pick you up" he says, gesturing for my five friends to leave.

"What about me?" I ask, when they walk out of the door.

"Well Josh, I'm hesitant to give you as severe a punishment, given the fact that you've only been here for just over a week, but I have to say that I'm worried. I don't think I've ever seen a freshman as much in their first week as I have seen you. You seem to have fallen in with the wrong crowd but I don't believe that you're a bad kid. Now I can't give you less after school detention than your friends, that would be unfair, so you will get two weeks of after school detention also, starting next Tuesday, but instead of the suspension, I am going to require that you join Glee Club for the next year" he says.

"Are you sure I can't just take the suspension? Joining glee club is going to do nothing for my cred" I say.

"I would think very carefully about what you say next Mr Puckerman and remember that a suspension would go on your permanent record" Uncle Finn says.

"Fine, I'll join the loser club" I say.

"Excellent. I have informed your teacher that you will be a little late to your next lesson, so you can go over to the auditorium and audition now" he says.

"Like right now?" I ask.

"Yes, now get a move on before I change my mind and decide to be less lenient on you" he says. I decide that now is not the right time to point out that two weeks of after school detention is not exactly lenient, and leave his office before I say something that may dig me into an even bigger hole.

I walk out of Finn's office and straight over to the auditorium. There's no one onstage when I go over there (why would there be when everyone's still in lessons?) so I just walk straight on.

"Josh, I wasn't expecting to see you today" Aunt Quinn (my actual real Aunt) says.

"I wasn't planning on auditioning but Uncle Finn doesn't take too kindly to people skipping class. This is my punishment" I say.

"What are you going to be singing?" Aunt Rachel asks.

"I'll be singing You and I (Nobody In The World) by John Legend" I say.

"That sounds great Josh, let's hear it" Aunt Quinn says.

I nod to the girl sitting behind the piano, to signal that she can start. She starts to play, and then I start to sing.

Josh:

You fix your make up, just so

Guess you don't know, that you're beautiful

Try on every dress you own

You were fine in my eyes half an hour ago

And if your mirror won't make it any clearer I'll

Be the one to let you know

Out of all the girls

You're my one and only girl

Ain't nobody in the world tonight

All of the stars, you make them shine like they were ours

Ain't nobody in the world but you and I

You and I

Ain't nobody in the world but you

You stop the room when we walk in

Spotlight's on everybody's staring

Tell all of these boys they're wasting their time

Stop standing in line, cause you're all mine

And this evening I won't let the feeling die

I never wanna leave your side

Out of all of the girls

You're my one and only girl

Ain't nobody in the world tonight

All of the stars you make them shine like they were ours

Ain't nobody in the world but you and I

You and I

Ain't nobody in the world

You keep wondering if you're what I'm wanting

You don't even have to try

You don't have to try

Don't try

Don't try

You don't have to try

Out of all the girls

You're my one and only girl

Ain't nobody in the world tonight

All of the stars, they don't shine brighter than you are

Ain't nobody in the world but you and I

You and I

You and I

Nobody in the world tonight

Ain't nobody in the world but you and I

"So, I guess since this is my punishment I kind of have to be in" I say.

"Yes you do, but we would have accepted you anyway. You have a great voice, really soulful. You definitely picked a song that highlighted your voice well" Aunt Quinn says.

"Was the song for any special guy in particular?" Aunt Rachel asks. It's pretty common knowledge that I'm gay, I don't try to hide it. It's the one part of me that I can't deny, even after the rape.

"No" I say. It's completely truthful; I have no one special in my life. I kind of envy Leigh and Niko that, the only sort of experience of a relationship I've had was violent, not one I wanted and he certainly didn't love me.

"Well you sure sing about it convincingly" Aunt Quinn says. I guess it's probably because I imagine that's what being in love with someone is like, rather than having experienced it myself.

"If that's all, I think I'll go now" I say.

"Yes we're done here. We'll see you at the rehearsal on Friday at four in the choir room, a full list of the glee club will be posted then as well, but that's just so everyone can see who all the other members are" Aunt Rachel says.

"I guess I'll see you then. Goodbye Aunt Quinn, Aunt Rachel" I say. I walk out of the auditorium and to my locker, fetching the books for my next class, before walking there.

The rest of the day goes pretty slowly, since I actually go to all my classes, rather than skipping half of them as I usually do. By the time the final buzzer of the day goes, signalling the end of school, I can't wait to get out of there. I run to my locker, grabbing the books I need for homework and then race out of school, waiting on the steps for my dad to pick me up. A hand grabs me from behind, and pulls me off the steps and into the bush. I scream when I look up at the face and see the face of the boy that raped me three years ago, Derek.

"Shush, I really don't need you screaming and alerting everyone to the fact that I'm here" he says.

"What the hell do you want that you haven't taken from me already?" I ask.

"I want what I've always wanted. Control over you" he says.

"I've done everything you've ever asked of me. I've been your sex toy and I've been your punching bag, and I am done" I say.

He whips out a knife and holds it to my throat. "You are done, when I say you're done and we are not done yet" he says.

"So what do you want this time?" I ask.

"I want you to date me" he says.

"What the hell?" I ask.

"You heard me. Date me or I will kill you" he says.

"And if I just tell someone that you're threatening me?" I ask.

"Then I will still kill you. You really don't have any other option" he says.

"I'll do whatever you want, just leave me alone, please" I say. He grabs my collar, and forces me to kiss him.

"Now I think you owe me an afternoon of fun" he says.

"I can't, my dad's coming to pick me up soon" I say.

He digs his knife into my neck a little deeper, causing a speck of blood to rise.

"Who owns you?" he asks.

"You do" I whisper.

"Damn straight, now let's go" he says, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards his car. I follow numbly, just wanting to do whatever it takes to get him to leave me alone. I thought one day it might happen, but he always wants more from me, and I'm not sure how much more I have to give.

Raina's POV

I wake up very early in the morning, around five am. I like to get up early, as I enjoy going out to sketch early in the morning. It gives me some alone time before school, and I just find that time in the morning so peaceful, when there's no one around and it feels like just me and the sky. I take a quick shower, and then dress in a peach strappy cami top, a pair of dark red jeggings, my dark red blazer, my light brown boots, my red heart locket necklace, and my music note charm bracelet. I quietly walk downstairs, and then go to the garage to get out my bike. I then cycle from my house to Schnoover Park. It takes a while, but that's okay since I have a while before school anyway. I sit under a tree facing the lake, and start to sketch. As I do so I hum a tune, and this humming eventually turns into a song.

Raina:

I see trees of green,

Red roses too.

I see them bloom,

For me and you.

And I think to myself,

What a wonderful world.

I see skies of blue,

And clouds of white.

The bright blessed day,

The dark sacred night.

And I think to myself,

What a wonderful world.

The colours of the rainbow,

So pretty in the sky.

Are also on the faces,

Of people going by,

I see friends shaking hands.

Saying, "How do you do?"

They're really saying

"I love you".

I hear babies cry,

I watch them grow,

They'll learn much more,

Than I'll ever know.

And I think to myself

What a wonderful world.

Yes, I think to myself,

What a wonderful world.

Oh yeah

I smile and for the next little while, I just sit there sketching happily and singing as I go. This is my favourite part of the day, it's so quiet, just a nice bit of me time before the craziness of the school day. Most people would probably hate just sitting in silence by themselves, but I actually enjoy my alone time. I don't always draw when I come out here, in fact I don't always come out here, sometimes I go to other places. I paint sometimes too, and read, but wherever I go I always go somewhere I can be outside. I love the outdoors, the freedom, the peacefulness, everything about it. I sit there for about an hour, sketching, and singing occasionally too. My sketch is about half complete by the time I decide I need to pack up and head home. I don't want to, I'd rather stay out here and draw some more, but if I don't head back soon then my mom will get worried.

When I get back home Mom and Dad are sitting around the kitchen table eating their breakfast.

"Hey Mom, Dad" I say as I walk into the kitchen.

"Hi sweetheart. Did you have a good time? Where did you go this morning?" Mom asks.

"Just down to Schnoover Lake. I had a great time, thanks, I got some good sketching done" I say. She places a bowl of fruit salad in front of me, my usual breakfast and I start to eat.

"So have you met any nice boys at school yet honey?" Mom asks.

"No, they're all idiots" I say. I don't mention that the main reason why I haven't found a nice boy is because I'm not interested in boys, I like girls. I still haven't come out to my parents yet, even though I've known I was a lesbian since I was thirteen. It's just difficult, I mean I know they have gay friends and everything, but I can't be certain how they'll react if I tell them that I'm gay. Besides, I don't want to be labelled, as soon as you come out, you automatically become "that gay kid" and I don't want that. I just want to be me.

"I'm sure you'll find someone nice eventually" Mom says.

"Maybe. So how's your album going Mom?" I ask, desperate to get the subject off me and my love life (or lack thereof really, it's not like I've ever been in a relationship, or even been kissed).

"It's going well Ray, thanks. We've laid down a couple of tracks, but we've still got a couple more to work on before the album's complete. The problem is the producer just doesn't get the sound I'm going for at all. I've got five tracks, and they're good tracks, but they don't quite have the right sound" she say just doesn't get the sound I'm going for at all. I've got five tracks, and they're good tracks, but they don't quite have the right sound" she says.

"You should ask Jonah if he'd help, he's dying to get some producing experience and he loves mixing beats and all that stuff" I say.

"We have a bring your son to work day coming up soon, so I might just think about that, thanks Ray" she says.

"No problem. How's work going for you Dad?" I ask.

"Alright, alright, alright" he says in his best Matthew McConaughey voice, making me laugh.

"How's school going Ray?" Mom asks me.

"It's going good so far, but it is only the second week back, so you never know" I say.

"I'm sure you'll be fine. I'm always more worried about how Jonah's getting on in school than you" she says.

"Well if it makes you feel better, it's the second week of school and he hasn't got into trouble yet" I say.

"This must be some kind of record" Dad says.

"Let's see if it sticks first" Mom replies.

"Unlikely, he's probably just planning his next big stunt" I say. We continue to talk for the next half an hour or so, Mom and Dad asking me questions about my art work, the latest book I've been reading, and what I'm going to do for my audition song for Glee. After this my mom calls for Jonah, as she does every morning at 7. If Mom didn't wake him up, he'd probably never get to school, that's how much he enjoys his lie ins. 20 minutes later, Jonah appears.

"Morning sleepyhead" I say.

"Mock you all want; studies show that teenagers need more sleep" he says.

"Do these studies also show that teenagers should go to bed at midnight every night?" I ask innocently, but with my eyes glimmering with the hint of a joke.

"Yeah, yeah" he says, sitting down at the table. Mom fills a bowl with Coco pops for him and then places it on the table in front of him, allowing him to pour his own milk.

"So a little birdie told me that someone joined Glee Club yesterday. What changed?" Mom asks Jonah.

"Ooh I bet I know" I say smirking. Jonah kicks me under the table, warning me not to say anything, but it is far too fun to annoy him.

"Kennedy asked me to, and I didn't want to disappoint her" he says.

"Well that's sweet of you" Mom says.

"You're so in love with her" I say.

"Am not!" he complains.

"You are. I'm guessing the broken hand had something to do with her?" I ask.

"It did not, I hurt it in basketball" he says.

"You didn't have basketball yesterday" I say.

"Shut up Ray" he mutters to me.

"It's alright Jonah, we already knew you liked Kennedy" Dad says.

"And you didn't tell me?" he asks.

"Wait you didn't know? But it's so obvious" I say.

"How exactly?" he asks.

"Boys are so dense. She's been the only girl in your life aside from me and mom that you've had a constant relationship, and you'll do anything for her including joining Glee even though you know it won't help your popularity, and the only reason that either of those things would happen is because you're in love with her" I say.

"How would you know? It's not like you've ever had a boyfriend" he says.

That hits hard in more ways than one, considering that for starters, he's right, I've never had a relationship, for seconds, I'm not looking for a boyfriend because I'm a lesbian.

"I'm sorry Ray that was harsh" he apologises.

"You're right, but that doesn't stop what I said from being true. Why don't you just ask her out?" I say.

"Because she doesn't like me like that, I overheard her talking to her Mom and Aunt Quinn about it. She said she just saw me as a brother, I mean when they talked to me about it, I said it would be like dating my sister, but then I overheard her saying that she didn't like me in that way either and it annoyed me for some reason, so I punched the wall and that's how I really broke my hand, okay?" he says.

"There's nothing wrong with liking her, she's a great girl, and you don't need to be embarrassed" I say.

"I'm not" he replies. "But it's not as if it's going to go anywhere if she doesn't like me" he says.

"She likes you, trust me" I say.

"But she said she didn't have feelings for me?" he asks, confused.

"Okay, I may be a relationship virgin, but you don't have to have been in a relationship to know that what girls say and what girls mean are two entirely different things" I say.

"So what does she mean, then?" he asks.

"She means that she likes you but that she doesn't want to ruin your friendship so she's going to deny that she likes you, because admitting that she likes you means that she has to open herself up to the possibility of being heartbroken by you and she doesn't want to do that" I say.

"How do you get all of that out of one sentence?" he asks.

"It's a girl thing Jo" Mom says.

"So what do I do?" he asks.

"Talk to her about it" I say.

"But what if she completely shoots me down?" he asks.

"If you like her enough, then you should be willing to take that risk" I say. Having finished my fruit salad, I say goodbye to Mom, Dad and Jonah, before going upstairs to grab my bag. Once I've got my bag, I walk back downstairs and out the door, grabbing my bike from where I left it on the lawn earlier this morning. It doesn't take long for me to cycle to school; we only live about fifteen minutes away. I head to the library as when I arrive at school there is still a little time before lessons start. I take out Divergent, which is our class's assigned book for English this semester. It's an okay book, but it's not really my favourite, I'm not all that keen on Dystopians, I much prefer mystery books, I like to see if I can work out the mystery before the characters in the books, but only if it's difficult to work out, if it's easy, then I don't feel like I've accomplished anything.

When the buzzer goes, I head back to my locker and grab my spare clothes, sketchbook and paints for Art class, as I take Art as one of my electives. I then walk over to the Art classroom which fortunately for me, is not that far from my locker. The morning passes amazingly quickly as I have both Art and English, my two favourite classes and before I know it, the buzzer goes for break.

I decide to head over to the auditorium for my glee audition at break, since I have a free period after, so it doesn't matter if there are lots of people auditioning and I have to wait a while. I shouldn't have worried, only Carly Hudson is auditioning. She's doing the cool thing with the cups like we did in the canteen yesterday. Carly and I don't really speak much, although I'm not sure why, she seems like the sort of person that I would be friends with. After Carly finishes and her mom and Aunt Quinn talk to her for a little bit, she leaves the stage and I walk on.

"Hi, Aunt Rachel, Aunt Quinn" I say.

"Hello Raina, I was wondering when you'd be here" Aunt Rachel says.

"I'd never miss out on joining Glee Club, I've wanted to be in one ever since Mom told me all the stories about Glee from when she was here" I say.

"What are you going to sing?" Aunt Quinn asks.

"People Help The People by Birdy" I say.

"Beautiful choice, let's hear it" Aunt Rachel says.

I nod to the piano player, and she starts to play as I start to sing.

Raina:

God knows what is hiding in those weak and drunken hearts

Guess he kissed the girls and made them cry

Those hard faced queens of misadventure

God knows what is hiding in those weak and sunken lives

Fiery throngs of muted angels

Giving love but getting nothing back, oh

People help the people

And if you're homesick

Give me your hand and I'll hold it

People help the people

And nothing will drag you down

Oh and if I had a brain,

Oh and if I had a brain

I'd be cold as a stone and rich as a fool

That turned all those good hearts away

God knows what is hiding in this world of little consequence

Behind the tears, inside the lies

A thousand slowly dying sunsets

God knows what is hiding in those weak and drunken hearts

Guess the loneliness came knocking

No one needs to be alone, oh singin'

People help the people

And if you're homesick

Give me your hand and I'll hold it

People help the people

Nothing will drag you down

Oh and if I had a brain,

Oh and if I had a brain

I'd be cold as a stone and rich as a fool

That turned all the good hearts away

Nah naah nah nah naaaaahhhhhh oooouuuu

Nah naah nah nah naaaaahhhhhh oooouuuu

People help the people

And if you're homesick,

Give me your hand and I'll hold it

People help the people

Nothing will drag you down

Oh and if I had a brain,

Oh and if I had a brain

I'd be cold as a stone and rich as a fool

That turned all those good hearts away

"Your voice is just as pretty as I remembered it was; I haven't heard you sing in a while" Aunt Rachel says.

"Thank you" I say.

"You're in Raina. We're putting up a full list on Friday, but that's really just so everyone can see who else is in. The first rehearsal will be on Friday at four in the choir room. Don't be late" Aunt Quinn says.

"I won't be. I'm really looking forward to it" I say.

"Well you're going to be a great addition to the Glee Club, Raina" Aunt Rachel says.

"Thanks" I say, smiling. I say goodbye to both Aunt Quinn and Aunt Rachel before heading out of the auditorium. As it's my free period, I head over to my locker, grab my bag and then walk over to the library. When I get there, I take a seat in the comfy bean bag chairs and start to read more of Divergent.

"How's the book?" a voice asks from next to me. I hadn't noticed anyone coming to sit next to me, but maybe that's just because I kind of zone everything out when I read.

"It's okay, not really my choice of book though" I say.

"School assignment?" she asks.

"Yeah, our assigned read for English this semester. Dystopian Fiction" I say.

"I'd rather have yours than mine" she says.

"What's yours?" I ask.

"John Green books, our class got assigned The Fault In Our Stars. I just find that his writing is so overrated" she says.

"Me too, but then I've never been much for that kind of book, I much prefer mysteries" I say.

"What kind of mystery? General crime, murder mystery, missing persons?" she asks.

"Any kind, I just like to see if I can work out the mystery before the characters. I worked out who A was way before any of the characters in Pretty Little Liars did" I say.

"Which A? Mona, Ali or Nick?" she asks.

"You've read them?" I ask.

"All of them, I was obsessed with the TV show when I was younger, and so I read the books. So which one was it you worked out?" she says.

"All of them, the TV show made it a lot harder. Sorry, I've been talking to you for ages, and I never asked you your name" I say.

"Sydney Lawson, and you?" she asks.

"Raina Evans" I reply. "So what books do you like then?" I ask.

"I read mostly fantasy stuff, I was obsessed with Harry Potter when I was a kid, and I was so disappointed when I didn't get my letter to Hogwarts when I was eleven" she says.

"Weren't we all?" I ask, making her laugh.

"My mum had to take me out for a huge ice cream sundae on my eleventh birthday to stop me crying about not getting my Hogwarts letter" she says.

"That's so cute. So what do you like about fantasy?" I ask.

"Sometimes I think that fantasy is better than reality" she says, winking.

"You might be right there" I reply. "So when did you move from England?" I ask.

"I moved out here when I was thirteen, my dad got a new job, in Columbus" she says.

"Where did you live before?" I ask.

"London" she says.

"Do you miss it?" I ask.

"Yeah, a lot. I mean, it's nice enough here and everything, but you can't quite match the energy in London" she says.

"I've never been. I'd love to go, I've actually never been out of the US before" I say.

"Really?" she asks.

"Well it's such a big country that our family holidays were always just to different states, not different countries. I'd love to travel though, to see places outside of the US" I say.

"You know, I just might know a way for you to do that" she says.

"Really? How?" I ask.

"Me and some of my friends are booking round the world tickets after graduation. You could come with us" she suggests.

"You barely even know me" I say.

"Not yet, but I'd like to" she says, stroking my hair.

"Can I ask you a question?" I ask, pulling away awkwardly.

"Sure, anything" she says.

"How did you…..you know come out?" I ask.

"Why, you want some tips?" she asks.

"I never said I was" I say, slightly on the defensive.

"Oh please, you don't need to be defensive with me; I could tell that you were checking me out, as soon as you saw me. Being bi means I have excellent gaydar" she says.

"So you're bi? Not just lesbian?" I ask.

"I fall in love with people, not their genders. Male, female, I don't care as long as you're a great person" she says.

"So how did you? Come out?" I ask.

"I didn't" she says.

"What do you mean? Your parents don't know?" I ask.

"Oh no they know" she says.

"So what do you mean?" I ask.

"All I mean is; I never sat my parents down to have that conversation. I came home one day with a girl I'd been dating for a while, and introduced her as my girlfriend. Sure, my parents had questions afterward, and I answered all of them, but we never made it a big deal. As far as I was concerned, I shouldn't have to come out, after all what's the big deal? Straight people don't have to come out, so why should we? Why should we have to declare that we like boys, or girls, or both boys and girls? We're no different from them" she says.

"I wish it was that easy" I say.

"It only has to be difficult if you make it difficult. Tell me, are your parents homophobic in any way?" she asks.

"No, I have "aunts" and "uncles" who are gay, they're my parents friends, so they're honorary aunts and uncles, but my parents love them, so I'm pretty sure they'd accept me. I just don't want to be labelled. I don't want to become 'that gay kid'" I say.

"Take it from me, no one can label you if you don't let them" she says.

"I wish I could be like that" I say.

"Like what?" she asks.

"Confident, not caring so much about what everyone else thinks of me" I say.

"It's not bad to care about what others think of you, but you can't care too much, otherwise you're being who other people want you to be and not who you are. You've got to be who you are and if other people don't like that, then that's their problem" she says.

I'm not really sure what I'm doing, I mean she hasn't given any signals to say that she wants this, but I lean in towards her, and kiss her. She seems a little surprised at first, but she returns the kiss willingly, even deepening it, as she flicks her tongue into my mouth. The kiss lasts several minutes, and we only pull away when we both need to breathe.

"Wow" I say. It only hits me then, that was my first kiss.

"You know you're not bad for a rookie" she says.

"How did you…..?" I ask.

"I can tell" she says winking.

"Would you like to…..I mean only if you want to…would you…..go out with me? Like maybe for coffee or something? This afternoon?" I ask. I've never been so nervous in my life, my palms are all clammy and I'm sweating.

"I wish I could, I really do, but I actually have a blind date" she says, apologetically.

"Oh" I say, trying to hide the crestfallen look on my face. I don't do a good job, because she notices.

"Look I'd love to go out with you, even if it's just as friends. I don't know where this whole blind date thing is going to go yet, but I do like you" she says.

"I like you too" I say.

"So maybe we could just get to know each other? See where things go?" she says.

"What if you like your blind date?" I ask.

"Then we'll cross that bridge when we come to it, but if you'd like to, then I'd really like to get to know you better" she says.

"I would love that" I say.

"So what do you like to do?" she asks.

"Reading, drawing, painting, running, anything where I can be outdoors, oh and of course singing" I say.

"Well since reading isn't exactly a social activity, and I'm not exactly a runner, how about we go for a hike instead? You said you liked being outdoors, and if we're just walking then it will give us a chance to talk" she says.

"I'd love that. Where?" I ask.

"You decide, you probably know the hiking trails around here better than I do" she says.

"Okay, how about next weekend?" I ask.

"Sounds perfect" she says.

We chat for a little longer, mostly about music, her life in London and our respective families. When the buzzer goes to signal the end of my free period, I'm kind of sad because I've been really enjoying talking to Sydney.

"So I'll see you around?" I ask. She takes my arm, and taking out a pen, scribbles something on it.

"What is that?" I ask.

"It's my number, call me when you've decided on a place for us to go hiking" she says.

"I will" I reply.

"Goodbye, Raina" she says.

"You can call me Ray, everyone does" I say.

"And you can call me Syd" she says. We share a hug and she gives me a kiss on the cheek.

"See you around" she says, flipping her long red hair over her shoulders, and walking out of the library.

"See you around" I whisper as she walks away. I seriously hope this blind date of hers is awful, because I think I really like her.

Kira's POV

I wake early, as I always do in the morning. Unlike Rubes, I don't like to lie in. Why would you sleep for any longer than necessary when there is so much to do? I mean sleeping is kind of boring, and I'd much rather be doing something. I quickly change into a pair of leggings and a tank top, before walking downstairs and into the basement. My dad built a dance space in our basement so that we could practice whenever we wanted, and so he could work on routines to teach the kids in his classes at home. I love it; it's great for my early morning practices when I don't want to have to drive to the studio. I turn on the music, at a low a level, and start to sing Selena Gomez's Come and Get It, and perform the dance routine from the video.

Kira:

When you're ready come and get it

When you're ready come and get it

Na na na na

Na na na na

Na na na na

When you're ready

When you're ready

When you're ready come and get it

Na na na na

Na na na na

Na na na na

You ain't gotta worry, it's an open invitation

I'll be sittin' right here, real patient

All day, all night, I'll be waitin' standby

Can't stop because I love it, hate the way I love you

All day, all night, maybe I'm addicted for life, no lie

I'm not too shy to show I love you, I got no regrets

I love you too much, too much to hide you, this love ain't finished yet

So baby whenever you're ready…..

When you're ready come and get it

When you're ready come and get it

Na na na na

Na na na na

Na na na na

When you're ready

When you're ready

When you're ready come and get it

Na na na na

Na na na na

Na na na na

You got the kind of love that I want, let me get that (let me get that yeah)

And baby once I get it, I'm yours no take backs

Gon' love you for life; I ain't leaving your side

Even if you knock it, ain't no way to stop it

Forever you're mine, baby I'm addicted, no lie, no lie

I'm not too shy to show I love you, I got no regrets

So baby whenever you're ready

When you're ready come and get it

When you're ready come and get it

Na na na na

Na na na na

Na na na na

When you're ready

When you're ready

When you're ready come and get it

Na na na na

Na na na na

Na na na na

This love will be the death of me

But I know I'll die happily

I'll know, I'll know, I'll know

Because you love me so…yeah!

When you're ready come and get it

When you're ready come and get it

Na na na na

Na na na na

Na na na na

When you're ready

When you're ready

When you're ready come and get it (when you're ready come and get it)

Na na na na

Na na na na

Na na na na

I hear clapping from the stairs and turn around to see Rubes standing there. "That was great" she says.

"You're awake? It's 6.30?" I say incredulously.

"I heard you singing" she says.

"I didn't mean to wake you up. How long have you been there?" I ask.

"Oh, only since about halfway through. That's a great routine" she says.

"Yeah, it's not going to win me the winter showcase though" I say.

"I've been thinking about that, and I think we should do a routine together. If we danced together we'd be bound to win, plus I love dancing with you Kiki" she says ruffling my hair. I duck away; I hate it when she does that.

"That sounds good; we could definitely put together a killer routine. You want to practice after school today?" I ask.

"I can't, I got a text from Freddie last night. He wants to meet for coffee" she says.

"See I told you he just needed a little time to cool off!" I say, punching her shoulder lightly.

"Not so fast, he just apologised for losing his temper and said he'd like to see me, he didn't say he'd talk about why me trying to make out with him made him upset" she says.

"Rubes, if he doesn't want to talk about it, it's probably with good reason. He's had a tough life with his parents dying and growing up with just his sister and his grandparents, I wouldn't push it if I were you" I say.

"I'm not trying to, I guess I'm just curious as to why it made him so uncomfortable" she says.

"He'll tell you when he's ready, and in the meantime you should just try to get to know the things about him that he is willing to tell you. Anyway, it sounds like someone has a date" I say.

"It is not a date, it's just coffee" she says.

"Yeah, coffee, not tutoring, so he's not being paid to be there, and he already kissed you and said he liked you, so it's a date" I say.

"What about you, huh? You're so interested in my love life, but I don't get to pry into yours? I don't see how that works" she says, teasingly.

"That would be because my love life is non-existent. I haven't been out with anyone since Louis last year" I say.

"Ah yes, the gay guy" she says.

"Look, I didn't know he was gay!" I insist.

"But it was so obvious!" she says, rolling her eyes.

"I just haven't met anyone nice enough yet. Most of the guys in our year are douchebags" I say.

"I could see if Freddie has any friends" she says, winking.

"Thanks, but I'll be okay. I don't need my older sister getting dates for me" I say.

"Well the offer's always there if you want it" she says.

"I appreciate that" I reply. "You want to join me?" I ask, turning back to where I was dancing before.

"Sure, why not?" she says, coming to stand next to me. I walk over to the docking station and press play on my IPod. We start to make up routines to the music which comes on, dancing not for practice, not for an exam, but just because we love to do it. Mom has to call several times for us because we don't hear her over the music.

We walk back up the stairs, and then into the kitchen, where Mom and Dad are sitting at the table.

"Hey Mom, Dad" I say.

"Hi Kira? And Ruby? This is a surprise, you're not usually awake this early" Mom says.

"I can be I just choose not to be" she says. Ruby and I both take our seats at the kitchen table.

"So how did the tutoring go with Freddie yesterday Rubes? I know you weren't keen on the whole tutoring thing but I hope he was helpful" Dad says.

"Oh she loved it" I say, and Rubes elbows me.

"What does she mean Rubes?" Dad asks, suspiciously.

"Nothing, she just means that he was really helpful. He explains things in a way that I can understand" she says.

"I bet he does" I say, and Rubes kicks me. I kick her back, annoyed at her hurting me, when I'm just joking around.

"Are you dating this boy Rubes? Or interested in him? Because we wouldn't have hired him as your tutor if we thought either you or he were interested in dating. You don't need another distraction from your work" Dad says.

"Come on Mike, if she says he's being helpful and her Math grades start to improve then it's none of our business whether she likes him or not" Mom says. I smile gratefully at her.

"I don't want you dating him. I'm sure he's a nice kid, but you need to focus on your work this year if you're going to maintain a GPA good enough to get into a great college" Dad says.

"I'm not dating Freddie okay! He's just a friend" she insists, shooting me a warning glare not to say anything.

"What about you Kira? Have you been seeing anyone?" Mom asks. I'm quite grateful that Mom's turning the attention off Freddie and Ruby because I think Ruby may just have killed me if I'd accidently spilled that she and Freddie are dating, well I suppose dating is too premature, but they certainly like each other and it seems to be heading that way.

"No, I'm just focusing on my schoolwork right now" I say, although it's not true, I only study as much as it takes to be able to pass an exam, I don't spend that much time studying.

"Good girl" Dad says.

"So are neither of us allowed to date, ever? Do we just have to focus on our work and never have any fun?" Rubes asks.

"No, I wasn't saying that. You can date, as long as it doesn't get in the way of your schoolwork" he says.

"So if it doesn't get in the way of my schoolwork, then can I date Freddie?" she asks.

"No" Dad replies.

"Why not? You said I could date if it didn't get in the way of my schoolwork" I say.

"He's your tutor, if you started dating him you would get distracted from your work" Dad says.

"I disagree, he's really helpful and I don't think me dating him would cause any problems" she says.

"The answer is no Ruby and that's all there is to it. He is your tutor, and you're allowed to be friends with him but if I find out you two are anything more than that then you will be getting a different tutor" Dad says. Ruby glares at him, and Mom quickly changes the topic in order to diffuse the tension.

"It's such a shame things didn't work out with you and Louis. I really liked him" Mom says, turning to me.

"So did I but as it turns out he prefers other guys" I say.

"And you never realised?" she asks.

"Do I need to bring up Uncle Blaine?" I ask, and my mom turns red in embarrassment.

"I knew he liked guys, I was just hoping that maybe he'd like me too. It was a long time ago and I wasn't exactly in the best place after your dad and I broke up" she says.

"I probably should have known, the nice ones are always gay" I say, sighing. It's true; all the other guys I've dated have been jerks, dated me for a few weeks and then dumped me as soon as something better came along.

"You'll find a nice guy honey, I'm sure" Mom says.

"Well it's not my highest priority at the moment" I say.

"What's going on at school at the moment girls?" Dad asks.

"Well aside from the boring school stuff, we're preparing for homecoming in cheerleading, I've got a big soccer game, and I'm going to audition for Glee today" I say.

"Have you prepared your audition song?" Dad asks.

"It's not one I need to prepare, I'm singing my go to song" I say.

"Whenever Wherever?" Dad asks.

"Damn straight!" I say. I love Shakira, she's my idol, she can sing, she can dance, she choreographs, she produces music, there's basically nothing the woman can't do. My dad wanted to name me after Shakira, but my mom wanted a Chinese name (don't know why, she's Korean), so they compromised on Akira. I would have preferred Shakira, but since everyone calls me Kira anyway, it really doesn't matter. My dad likes to joke that I can't shut up because they dropped the "Sh" from my name.

"I'm sure you'll get in, honey, you and your sister are both very talented" Mom says.

"Thanks Mom" I say.

"So I heard the music downstairs, what were you girls practicing?" Dad asks.

"We were just mucking around, improvising routines to songs on Kira's IPod" Rubes says.

"That's good, it's good to have fun dancing and not just structured practice all the time" Dad says.

"Yeah we're thinking about auditioning for the winter showcase" I say.

"Will you help us choreograph a routine Dad?" Rubes asks.

"I'm sure you girls could choreograph a brilliant routine by yourselves" he says.

"We could, but we could choreograph an even better routine with your help. You're the best dancer we know Dad" I say.

"Well in that case I would be honoured" he says.

"Would you be able to do after school tomorrow?" Rubes asks.

"What's wrong with this afternoon?" he asks.

"Oh, Freddie and I have another tutoring session" she says.

"I thought you didn't have another one until next week? I'm not paying for him more than once a week, he's not cheap" Dad says.

"I needed some extra help for a math test I've got coming up, and he agreed to do it for the price of a coffee" she says.

"Are you sure it's tutoring and not a date?" Dad asks suspiciously.

"I really do have a math test, you can call school and ask if you want" she says.

"Fine" Dad says, although he still doesn't look completely happy. I'm not sure why, although I haven't officially met Freddie, I've seen him around school and he seems like a nice enough guy. I mean I get that he doesn't want Rubes to be distracted from her schoolwork, but it sounds as if Freddie really helped her with her Math, and he might actually be a good influence on her. Hopefully he'll come around, because I don't see Rubes stopping dating him.

"Maybe we could practice after school tomorrow" I suggest.

"Well my classes don't finish until eight, so you girls could always come down and practice whilst you wait for me to finish, or you could help out with some of the classes if you want, earn a little extra cash" Dad says. Rubes and I are both assistant coaches at my dad's studio, we teach an Intermediate class each (under Dad's supervision), and we often help out with some of the other classes from time to time in order to get some extra money.

"I'd be down for that" Rubes says.

"Me too" I say.

"Great" Dad says. My favourite thing in the entire world is dancing with Dad. We've always been close, closer than me and my mom, because my mom and I have totally different personality types, she's always been shy, and me…..well anyone who knows me would say that I'm anything but. I mean my Dad and I are different too, but we've bonded over being popular, smart and of course our love for dancing.

"So what classes have you got tomorrow afternoon anyway?" I ask.

"Oh, I have my beginners' ballet, my intermediate contemporary, my advanced ballet and my intermediate street class" he says. My dad teaches a large range of dance styles, he can do almost everything. I want to be like that, to be able to dance every possible dance style available. I want to travel the world, making a living from people who want to come and see me dance.

"We have Cheerios practice for about an hour straight after school, but we can come over after that" Rubes says. I'd almost forgotten that we had cheerleading practice tomorrow.

"That's fine, just come over when you're ready" Dad says.

"So how are your classes going Dad?" I ask.

"Really well, we're planning on doing a Christmas showcase in December to show off the studio, see if we can attract some more kids to learn there. The studio's doing pretty well anyway though, we just added two extra classes, and we're interviewing for more teachers" he says.

"I could always take on another class if you need more help" I say. Although I want to be a professional dancer, and not teach dance like my dad, I do really enjoy helping out with the classes at his studio.

"Thanks honey, but you need to be at least 17 to take your qualifications. You're great as an assistant coach, but you're not quite old enough to be a coach yet. Maybe you and your sister can take your exams next year" he says.

"I'd love that" I say. "What about you Mom? How's the vocal coaching going?" I ask.

"It's going well, one of the girls I teach is a senior and she's applying to NYADA so I'm helping her with the video part of her application" Mom says. We talk a little more about school, before Rubes and I say goodbye and walk out to the car. It's my turn to drive to school today, as Rubes drove yesterday. I hop in the driver's seat of the car, whilst she gets in the passenger seat.

"Look, I'm sorry that I made those jokes about you and Freddie in front of Mom and Dad. It wasn't cool, I get that you don't want them to know, and I promise, I won't tell them anything" I say.

"I did want to tell them. I was so excited; finally I could tell them about a boy I liked, one that they would actually approve of. I mean Freddie is everything they've ever wanted in a boyfriend for me, he's smart, even smarter than me, he's sweet, and yeah he's a little awkward but in really cute way. This is so typical, I finally like a boy that they might approve of and they don't want me to date him! It's so unfair!" she says.

"I know, Rubes, I'm sorry" I say.

"It doesn't matter. I don't need them to approve. If I want to date Freddie, then I am damn well going to date Freddie, I don't care what they think" she says.

"You shouldn't, if you like him, then go for it" I say.

"You're not going to tell me that it's a terrible idea?" she asks, sounding surprised.

"No, I think Dad's wrong. I think Freddie could be really good for you, and your schoolwork. If it's something you want, then you should go for it" I say.

"Will you be my alibi?" she asks.

"What?" I reply.

"When I go out with Freddie, can I say I'm going out with you instead? Dad will get suspicious if I say we're having extra tutoring sessions all the time" she says.

"What do I do whilst you're out with Freddie?" I ask.

"You can do whatever you want, it doesn't really matter to me" she says.

"Fine I'll do it" I say.

"Thanks Kira, you're the best" she says. I happily chatter on about anything and everything for the rest of the drive, with Ruby nodding along, and adding to the conversation when she has something to say. Ruby's not quite as chatty as me, sure she's confident and outgoing, but unlike me, she knows when to shut up. I hate long silences, and I always want to fill them with anything, no matter how nonsensical. I think Rubes is kind of relieved when we pull into the parking lot and I finally stop talking.

"You have to tell me how your date with Freddie goes this afternoon. I'm living vicariously through you remember?" I say.

"Well maybe you should find yourself a boyfriend and change that. See you later Kira" she says, spotting a friend of hers from Cheerios and rushing over to join them. I head over to my locker, grabbing my History books before walking to class.

Unlike my sister, I love school; I'm just too lazy to study for anything. Still, I don't need to study, I'm smart enough to barely study for any test at all and I will still get a decent grade. It's fun learning new stuff, it's just not fun revising stuff that you've already learned. The morning passes pretty quickly as I throw myself into my schoolwork, and before I know it, its break time. I head over to the auditorium for my glee audition, taking a seat behind Aunt Rachel and Aunt Quinn. I watch as first Carly Hudson auditions, and then Raina Evans. Once Raina's finished her song, and she leaves the stage, I walk up the steps, taking my position in the centre of the stage.

"Hey Kira, I was hoping we'd see you here today" Aunt Rachel says.

"I figured you could use someone with crazy dance skills like mine and I've wanted there to be a glee club at school ever since I started here" I say.

"So which Shakira song did you choose?" Aunt Quinn asks.

"How did you know?" I ask.

"Please Shakira is to you, what Barbra Streisand is to Rachel, there was no way you weren't going to do one of her songs" Aunt Quinn says.

"I'll be singing Whenever, Wherever" I say, smiling.

"Great song choice, go for it" she says.

I tie my tank top in a knot, so that my belly is exposed, as my routine is a belly dancing one (it's not my favourite style of dance, but it's the one that the song requires so I have to put aside my personal insecurities about my body for the art). I nod to the sound guy, and he starts the music, and I begin to sing, and dance.

Kira:

Lucky you were born that far away so

We could both make fun of distance

Lucky that I love a foreign land for

The lucky fact of your existence

Baby I would climb the Andes solely

To count the freckles on your body

Never could imagine there were only

Ten million ways to love somebody

Le ro lo le lo le, Le ro lo le lo le

Can't you see

I'm at your feet

Whenever, wherever

We're meant to be together

I'll be there and you'll be near

And that's the deal my dear

Thereover, hereunder

You'll never have to wonder

We can always play by ear

And that's the deal my dear

Lucky that my lips not only mumble

They spill kisses like a fountain

Lucky that my breasts are small and humble

So you don't confuse them with mountains

Lucky I have strong legs like my mother

To run for cover when I need it

And these two eyes that for no other

The day you leave will cry a river

Le ro le le lo le, Le ro le le lo le

At your feet

I'm at your feet

Whenever, wherever

We're meant to be together

I'll be there and you'll be near

And that's the deal my dear

Thereover, hereunder

You'll never have to wonder

We can always play by ear

But that's the deal my dear

Le ro le le lo le, Le ro le le lo le

Think out loud

Say it again

Le ro lo le lo le lo le

Tell me one more time

That you'll live

Lost in my eyes

Whenever, wherever

We're meant to be together

I'll be there and you'll be near

And that's the deal my dear

Thereover, hereunder

You've got me head over heels

There's nothing left to fear

If you really feel the way I feel

Whenever, wherever

We're meant to be together

I'll be there and you'll be near

And that's the deal my dear

Thereover, hereunder

You've got me head over heels

There's nothing left to fear

If you really feel the way I feel

I finish the song with one last shake of my hips, before landing in the splits. I then pull myself up, untying my tank top and allowing it to drop back down.

"What did you think?" I ask.

"You're very talented Kira, your dancing skills could certainly be used in Glee Club, and your voice isn't half bad either. You're in" Aunt Rachel says.

"Really?" I ask.

"Really. There'll be a full list going up Friday, but that's just a technicality. First rehearsal is on Friday, in the choir room at four, so don't be late" Aunt Quinn says.

"Thank you!" I say, running off the stage. I'm not looking where I'm going and I run straight into someone who was standing on the side of the stage.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry" I say.

"No problem" a voice says. The owner of the voice pushes himself up, and then holds out a hand to help me up, which I accept gratefully. I look up and finally realise who I ran into. It's Jackson Avery, the notorious playboy who has slept with half the girls in this school.

"Oh it's you" I say.

"No need to sound so disappointed" he says, winking.

"I'm not falling for your crap, so you may as well leave right now" I say.

"Who says it's crap? What if you're the one I really want?" he asks, batting his eyelashes.

"Ok if you think I'm going to fall for that, then you really are crazy" I say, pushing past him, but he grabs my wrist.

"Let go of my hand" I say, in a quiet, but obviously angry voice.

"I just wanted to say that I thought you were really good out there. I've never seen you dance before, you were really fantastic" he says.

"You've never seen me dance before because we're not friends and if we were friends you would know that my dad is dance teacher, and he's been teaching me to dance since I was three years old, so you're damn right I'm good" I say.

"No need to get so angry, I was giving you a compliment" he says.

"I don't want to be a girl that you compliment. The girls you compliment, you end up sleeping with, and I'm not going to hurt whichever girl currently thinks she's going out with you, by helping you cheat on her" I say.

"So my reputation precedes me" he says.

"Every girl in this school knows who you are. The smart ones know to run for the hills as soon as you come near them" I say.

"Is that not like judging a book by its cover?" he asks.

"There's no need to judge the cover when you already know from multiple sources that the content is bad" I retort.

"Ooh, so she has sass does she?" he says, looking mildly impressed.

"What do you want Jackson, you're making me late for class" I say.

"Coffee, that's all" he replies.

"Fine, I will meet you after school today. Now are we done here?" I say, moving to go past him, but he blocks my path.

"Now" he says.

"Now? I have Math now" I say.

"So? Ditch it" he says.

"I am not skipping class for you!" I say. I don't understand why he seems to be so obsessed with me today; I guess I'm just flavour of the month. He'll be onto someone new as soon as whichever girl he's saved from being slushied this time dumps him, after realising he's cheating on her. I'm not going to be the other woman.

"Live a little Kira. You spend your whole life doing as Mommy and Daddy and your teachers tell you, for once do something spontaneous and fun" he says.

"You don't know shit about me!" I say, pushing to move past him, but he won't budge.

"I'm not moving until you agree to go with me. We can either stand here for the rest of the day, or you can come out for a quick coffee with me, but either way you miss your lesson, so you may as well choose the fun option" he says.

"Fine, one coffee, but then you're bringing me straight back here" I say.

"Deal" he says, extending his hand. I reluctantly shake it, not really wanting to go with him, but figuring that going for coffee is better than being stuck here, if those are my only two options. I follow him outside, and he leads me over to a motorcycle. He hands me a helmet.

"Hop on" he says.

"I am not getting on that thing" I say, taking a couple of steps away from the bike. Call me crazy, but I prefer my transportation to have doors so there's no chance of me falling off either side, and a windscreen so there's no chance of me flipping over the front, and a back so that I can't fall off the back. Basically, I like being in a car.

"Come on Kir, it's only ten minutes to the coffee shop, you'll barely be on the bike" he says.

"If I die on this thing, then I'm blaming you" I say, grudgingly taking the helmet. He gets on the bike, and then I get on behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist. He revs the engine, and then we are roaring down the road, travelling way faster than the national speed limit. Once my initial nerves die down, I actually really enjoy it, and I'm almost sad when we get to the coffee shop.

"So, riding on the back of the bike? Cool or what?" he asks.

"I have to admit, it was pretty fun" I say smiling.

"It's so much better than a car. You get to dodge traffic, so you get everywhere faster, and let's face it, a bike is just cooler" he says.

"Plus it adds to your bad boy image which I'm sure doesn't hurt" I say, making him laugh.

"You're right, it doesn't" he says. He walks into the coffee shop, and I follow.

"What do you want?" he asks me, when we reach the till.

"A caffe macchiato please" I say.

"One caffe macchiato, and a latte please" he says. We wait at the counter for the barista to bring over our drinks. She comes back a few minutes later with our drinks.

"That will be $6.55" the girl says. Jackson goes for his wallet but I stop him.

"This is not a first date, I can pay for my own drink" I say. I hand over the $3.85 for my drink, and then he pays for his before we walk over to a booth in the back.

"You know I could have paid for that" he says.

"I know, but I didn't want you to. Like I said, this isn't a date. I'm trying to get away from the douche type and you definitely fit into that category" I say.

"That's not fair, you don't even know me" he says.

"So if you're not a douche then why do you date girls, only to cheat on them a few months later and leave them broken-hearted?" I ask.

"It sounds cliché but I just haven't found the right girl yet. I don't mean to hurt them, I honestly think that I like each girl that I go out with, until I meet someone better" he says.

"So why don't you just dump the girl you're currently seeing for the new girl you like?" I ask.

"I guess I like the danger of cheating. The feeling of almost being caught but not quite, the feeling of living on the edge. It's like the buzz you get from drugs or alcohol, I guess" he says.

"There are other ways to create that kind of buzz" I say.

"How would you know? When was the last time you did something crazy?" he asks.

"Who's being judgemental now? I love taking risks, the bigger the better, as long as it's legal. I've done rock climbing, and no not the indoor kind, the one with actual rocks, whitewater kayaking, scuba diving and windsurfing, and none of those things are particularly safe" I say.

"Whoa, okay there little daredevil" he says laughing a little. "So if you're such a daredevil why were you scared of my bike?" he asks.

"I never said I wasn't scared of any of those things, I was, but I did them anyway, because fear is great adrenaline and if I didn't do them I would have kicked myself. Plus they were all great fun; I find that the things you're scared of are usually the most fun to do. Also I'm a cheerleader, and that's actually pretty dangerous, if anyone twitches in the pyramid then that could send everyone else tumbling down, and the girls at the top of the pyramid could get knocked unconscious or worse if they fall" I say.

"Oh yeah, I forget that you're a cheerleader. You don't seem quite as ditsy as the rest of them" he says.

"That is such a stereotype, cheerleaders are not airheads. Lots of my friends are really smart and they're in line for cheerleading scholarships at really good colleges" I say.

"Hey, you stereotyped me first!" he says.

"How about we make a deal and from now on, neither of us stereotypes the other?" I suggest.

"Sounds good" he says.

"So aside from skipping school, what do you do? You into sports, or music, or art or what?" I ask.

"I like music a bit, but I'm more of a sports guy. I do baseball in the summer season, and then basketball in the winter season" he says.

"You sure you haven't seen me cheering at one of your games?" I ask.

"I'd remember a face like yours" he says, stroking my cheek. I pull away quickly, reminding myself that I can't let myself fall for him, because he'll just break my heart.

"So Jackson's a pretty unusual first name. Where'd it come from? Is it a family name or something?" I ask.

"No, my mom comes from Jackson, Mississippi, she named me after her hometown" he says.

"You don't sound like you come from the South" I say.

"That would be because I don't. My mom moved to Lima before I was born" he says.

"What happened?" I ask.

"The usual, my grandparents kicked her out when she found out she was pregnant with me. She was only seventeen. She got on the first flight out of Mississippi and it was to Ohio. She saw a wanted ad in the paper for a waitress in Lima and she took the job, so she ended up here" he says.

"I'm sorry that must have been rough. Where's your dad?" I ask.

"My mom's a tough cookie, she bounced back. My dad on the other hand, is a loser, he ran about a minute after my mom told him she was pregnant. We haven't heard from him since" he says.

"I can't imagine how hard that must be. Me and my dad have always been really close" I say.

"It's not that bad, me and my mom are really close, and I'm close to my little sister too, so I've never needed anyone else" he says.

"You have a sister? What's she called?" I ask.

"Melissa, she's nine" he says.

"Aww I bet she's sweet" I say.

"She is, she'd love you, she's obsessed with dancing" he says.

"Well my dad's taking new students at the studio if she wants to come down for a lesson sometime" I say.

"Thanks but she's already taking lessons with Jake Puckerman. We did look at other places, but my mom doesn't make all the much money, and Jake's classes are a lot cheaper than most, even if they are in the seedy part of town" he says.

"No offence taken, Jake's a great dancer, and he's one of my dad's friends" I say.

"Still she'd definitely love to meet you. She wants to be a professional dancer someday, a ballerina like Anna Pavlova or Margot Fonteyn" he says.

"It impresses me that you know who they are for starters…" I say.

"Nine year old sister here" he says, interrupting me.

"But if your sister wants ballet tips she should really talk to Freya Hummel-Anderson, the girl's incredible. I mean I'm taking my grade 8 exam this year, but Freya's doing her Advanced 1, and she's a high enough standard to do Advanced 2, she's just not old enough to take it" I say.

"Do you have a phone number?" he asks.

"I should probably talk to her sister; see if she'll talk to her. Freya's great at ballet, but she's not the most approachable person, so I'll have Sierra talk to her, and see if she'll consider doing it. She might just outright say no if she's asked by someone who doesn't know her very well" I say.

"Thanks, I appreciate that" he says.

"So your sister's name is Melissa? Do you have any other siblings?" I ask.

"No it's just me, my sister and my mom" he says.

"What's your mom called? Is she still a waitress?" I ask.

"My mom is called Laura, and no she's not a waitress anymore, she got her high school diploma online, and then went to community college, got a psych degree and now she's a counsellor" he says.

"That's really cool. Is she like a therapist, or a guidance counsellor?" I ask.

"A therapist, she works at a clinic downtown" he says.

"So she managed to get her degree, whilst working and taking care of you and your sister?" I ask.

"She worked days and took classes during the evening, and we would stay with her friends whilst she was at work, and if she couldn't find anyone to look after us, then she'd bring us to work with her, and sit us down with colouring books and stuff like that, and come check on us, when there was a lull, she always made sure we were looked after" he says.

"She sounds like a great mom" I say.

"She is. What about you though? I've been telling you all about my family and I haven't heard a thing about yours. What are they like?" he asks.

"My family? They're great, like I said, my dad has a dance studio, and he taught both me and my sister to dance. We're really close, we share the same love of dancing, and I'm his little girl which basically means I can get him to do whatever I want. My mom's a vocal coach, we aren't so close, we're quite different personality wise and we clash quite a lot" I say.

"You and your dad sounds like me and my sister, she has me wrapped around her little finger as well. What about you? Do you have any siblings?" he says.

"Yeah I bet she does! I have an older sister Ruby, she's 17, and we're really close. She loves to dance as well, and sing, & she's also a cheerleader. She's awesome, she does what she wants when she wants and doesn't give a damn what people think of her. I really admire that about her, she never feels like she has to be good enough for anyone else, other people have to be good enough for her" I say.

"She sounds really cool. But what about you? Tell me something about you" he says.

"Me? I like to surprise people. I never want to be what people would expect me to be" I say.

"Now that I can believe, you've surprised me plenty already today" he says.

"Why did you come to Glee auditions today? I didn't even think you knew who I was" I say.

"Well I didn't, not really, anyway. I mean, I had heard of you, enough to know your name, but I didn't know anything more than that" he says.

"So why did you come?" I ask.

"Honestly? I figured some cute girls might audition and I wanted to try my luck. I stayed because I saw you dance, and I was captivated by you" he says.

"Is that a pick up line or are you actually being truthful?" I ask.

"I'm being completely honest. I've never seen anyone dance like that before, it was like the music was a part of you" he says.

"That's really sweet" I say.

"You're really sweet" he replies, leaning his face toward mine. I pull away.

"We should probably go" I say, looking down and realising that without knowing it, I'd finished my coffee. He nods, and takes a last sip of his drink. I leave a couple of dollars for a tip, on the table before following him out to his bike again. This time, I get on without hesitation, actually wanting to feel the exhilaration of riding on the back of the bike again. We breeze down the road back to school, going at least 20 miles over the national speed limit, but neither of us really cares; we're having so much fun. I want to stretch my arms out, and lean back, feeling the wind on my arms, but I know if I do that then I'll just fall off, so I wrap my arms tighter around Jackson, leaning my head on his shoulder.

We arrive back at school about ten minutes later, and I jump off the bike, taking my helmet off and shaking my hair out.

"You look cute with helmet hair" Jackson says, taking my helmet back from me.

"Thanks" I say. We step closer to each other, so there's barely an inch between us.

"I can't" I whisper, although I can feel my resolve weakening. It has been, little by little, as I've realised that he's not as much of a jerk as I first thought. Still, I know he must be seeing one or more other girls, and I can't hurt them. I don't want to be one of those girls, who knowingly cheats with someone she knows is in a relationship. A small voice inside me says "but you don't actually know that he's seeing someone" and it's fighting with the voice that says "but you know he is; he always is".

"Yes you can" he whispers back. "You can't deny the chemistry between us" he says.

"I don't want to hurt anyone" I say.

"You're not hurting anyone. Not yet anyway" he says.

"That's the problem Jackson. I'm always just going to be friends with benefits to you, you're going to get another girlfriend and I'm just going to be the girl on the side" I say.

"You know who the real me is now, are you telling me that you aren't willing to take a chance on that guy?" he asks.

"I'd be willing to take a chance on that guy, if I knew for sure that was the real you" I say.

"Well for that you just have to trust me" he says.

"I'm not sure if I can" I say.

"Aren't you?" he asks, leaning towards me. This time, I don't resist and I allow him to kiss me, kissing him back. I jump up, wrapping my legs around his waist. He deepens the kiss, running his hands through my hair. After a few long, minutes, we both finally pull away.

"I should go, I don't want to miss anymore class time" I say.

"You could have so much more fun with me" he says, lifting my shirt. I smack his hand away.

"No! I'm not that kind of girl! I'm not going to lose it like this" I say.

"Lose it? You mean you're still a…?" he says, trailing off.

"Yes, I have too much respect for myself to sleep with just anyone. When I do finally have sex, it's going to be with someone special" I say.

"I am someone special" he says, pulling me closer to him again. I slap his hand away once more.

"You're going to have to prove that" I say, stepping away from him.

"Can I at least have your number?" he asks. I take a pen out of my bag, and scrawl it on his arm.

"See you later, Jackson Avery" I say.

"See you later, Kira Chang" he replies. I turn away from him, swinging my hips a little as I walk. I either just met a really great guy, or made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. Problem is; I'm not sure which one yet.

Rachel's POV

"So is that it? Is that everyone?" I ask, when Quinn and I finish going over our notes from all the auditions on Friday morning, and have made our final decisions on who is going to be in, although it's pretty much a technicality, everyone we said got in on their audition day is in.

"Yeah, that's it. Can you believe how many people we got? When we were in Glee we were lucky that we got thirteen people, and now we've got more than twenty members" Quinn says.

"It's lucky we all had a lot of kids!" I say, making Quinn laugh.

"So where are we on the name? Do we want to keep it as New Directions, or do we want to change it to something new?" she asks.

"I think it's a new era of Glee, we should give the club a new name, a new legacy. I don't think it's exactly fair to impose our legacy on us, we should let them create their own" I say.

"I like your thinking" she says. We discuss names for about an hour before we finally land on a name that we both love.

"You ready to make this Glee Club official?" I ask.

"Definitely. You want to put the list up together?" she asks.

"We should, as our first official act as co-directors of this Glee Club" I say. We walk out of the choir room together, over to the noticeboard, and pin up the list of our first official Glee Club members.

"I feel like we should toast the moment" Quinn says when we've put up the list.

"We should, but we can't drink on school property remember?" I say.

"Darn that stupid rule!" she says, and we both laugh.

"We can go out tonight to celebrate, I'll bring Finn and you can bring Puck" I say.

"Sounds like a plan" she says, and we go our separate ways, me towards my car, and Quinn towards her classroom. I'm so excited, for the first time since I moved back to Lima, I finally feel like I'm doing something that I'm really passionate about.

McKinley High Glee Club 2037

Members:

Freshmen:

Carly Hudson

Freya Hummel-Anderson

Connor McCarthy

Josh Puckerman

Skye Samson

Eli Schuester

Sophomores

Jessie Abrams

Hanna Bradley

Raina Evans

Candice Hantz

Abby Hummel-Anderson

Sierra Hummel-Anderson

Remy Lynn

Morgan Lopez-Pierce

Juniors

Ruby Chang

Kira Chang

Jonah Evans

Hamish Flanagan

Shay Hudson

Kennedy Hudson

Sydney Lawson

Lexi Lopez-Pierce

Brant Lopez-Pierce

Drew McCarthy

Hayden Miller

Rose Puckerman

Ginny Puckerman

Shannon Puckerman

Leigh Puckerman

Freddie Robinson

Congratulations everyone! We hope this is going to be a great year!

I return to McKinley in the afternoon, having spent the rest of the day doing my part time job doing singing lessons at the McCarthy music store. When I arrive, Quinn and the kids are already in the choir room waiting for me.

"I'm sorry I'm late, I got held up in traffic" I say when I enter the room.

"No problem, we weren't going to start without you" Quinn says smiling.

"So you guys, welcome to the new glee club at McKinley High!" I say.

"Are we going to be nameless for the rest of the year, or have you actually decided on a name?" Shay asks, sounding bored. I will reprimand her for her bad attitude later, but for now I decide to ignore it.

"We have decided that the new name for this glee club is going to be Teenage Dreamers" I say.

"Like the Katy Perry song?" Kennedy asks.

"Yes, Teenage Dream is a Katy Perry song, but that is not why we chose the name. We chose the name because in high school, Glee Club was the place we came to make all of our big, crazy dreams come true, and we're hoping that our Glee Club is going to do the same thing for you" Quinn says.

"Now, I know most of you know each other, but we figured it wouldn't hurt to having a little getting to know you session at the beginning of our first meeting, given that some of you may not know each other, so let's all go around the room, and give our name, age, grade, something we like and something we dislike" I say. "How about you go first Shay?" I say, nodding towards my daughter.

"Fine, my name is Shay Hudson, I'm 17 and a Junior, I like cheerleading and I dislike being forced to join this stupid, reputation sucking club" she says, rolling her eyes. I should have figured it wasn't going to be easy getting her to come around to the idea of being in Glee. Still I have the whole year to change her mind.

"You pick someone to go next Shay" Quinn says.

"Fine, The Freak can go next" she says nodding towards Freya.

"My name is Freya Hummel-Anderson, I'm 14 and a Freshman, I like ballet, and I dislike spinach" Freya says. "Do you want to go next Carly?" she asks.

"Sure. My name is Carly Hudson, I'm also 14 and a Freshman, I like pizza and I dislike studying" she says. "Do you want to go next Jessie?" she asks.

"My name is Jessie Abrams, I'm 15 and a sophomore, I like dancing, and I dislike cooking, I really suck at it" she says. "Do you want to go next Remy?" she asks.

"My name is Remy Lynn, I'm also 15 and a sophomore, I like sport and I dislike getting up early, I mean 8.30 really is an ungodly hour to have to get to school for! Anyway, do you want to go next Hanna?" he says, turning to the pretty blonde girl who played the guitar and did all those Taylor Swift songs in her audition.

"Hi, my name is Hanna Bradley, I'm 15, and yes I'm also a sophomore, I like country music, and I dislike the fact that my parents can't agree a custody arrangement so their divorce hasn't been finalised yet and it's already been six months!" she says. A brief silence settles over the room after her outburst, no one's quite sure what to say. "How about you go next Brant?" she says, looking over at Brant Lopez-Pierce, and breaking the uncomfortable silence.

"My name is Brant Lopez-Pierce; I'm 16 and a Junior, I like swimming and I dislike spicy food. Would you like to go next Ruby?" he asks.

"My name is Ruby Chang, I'm 17 and a Junior, I like acting, in fact I want to go to drama school, and I dislike Math, and yes it is possible for an Asian to dislike Math, we're not all Math geniuses. Freddie do you want to go next?" she says, turning to the shy blonde boy, the one with the really sad, soulful voice, who is sitting next to her.

"My name is Freddie Robinson, I'm also 17 and a Junior, I like my sister, and I dislike sport, I'm just not very good at it. Uh, I don't really know anyone here, so I'll just hand it over to you" he says, turning to face Kira Chang who is sitting across from him, on the other side of Ruby.

"My name is Kira Chang, I'm 16 and a Junior, I like talking, a lot, I mean I can never understand those people who just like to stay silent all the time, what's the fun in that? and I dislike being sterotyped" she says. She is certainly a ball of energy; we're going to have to find a constructive way to use that energy. "Would you like to go next?" she asks, nodding at Lexi Lopez-Pierce who is sitting on the back row.

"My name is Lexi Lopez-Pierce, I'm 16 and a Junior, I like Peppermint Hot Chocolates and I dislike homophobes, there is nothing wrong with having two moms!" she says. "Would you like to go next?" she says, nodding at Abby Hummel-Anderson.

"My name is Abby Hummel-Anderson, I'm 16 and a sophomore, I like dancing, and I dislike people who are sexist. Do you want to go next Shannon?" she says and Shannon nods.

"My name is Shannon Puckerman, I'm 16 and a Junior. I like reading, and I dislike Katy Perry, but I still think Teenage Dreamers is a cool name for the club" she says. "Do you want to go next? I'm sorry, I don't know your name" she says, turning to Hamish Flanagan sitting behind her.

"My name is Hamish Flanagan, I'm 17 and a Junior, I like music and I dislike homework, but I mean who does like homework? Do you want to go next? Pretty girl with the pink highlights" he says, nodding at Rose Puckerman.

"My name is Rose Puckerman, I'm 16 and a Junior, I like the colour pink, as you can probably tell, and I dislike sports. My twin sister Ginny can go next" she says.

"My name is Ginny Puckerman, I'm 16 and a Junior, I like writing and I dislike crowds. Do you want to go next? It's Jonah right?" she says, nodding to Jonah Evans.

"My name is Jonah Evans, I'm 16 and a Junior, I like girls, and I dislike studying. Do you want to go next Kennedy?" he says. I smile seeing my daughter sitting next to him, looking at him like he's the only guy in the room. I seriously don't get why those two haven't got together yet, I was expecting it about three or four years ago.

"My name is Kennedy Hudson, I'm 16 and a Junior, I like fashion, and I dislike bullies. Would you like to go next Sierra?" she says.

"My name is Sierra Hummel-Anderson, I'm 15 and a sophomore, I like Beyonce, and I dislike studying. How about you go next Sydney?" Sierra says.

"My name is Sydney Lawson, I'm 17 and a Junior, I like London, especially the West End, and I dislike homophobes. Do you want to go next Candi?" she says, putting her arm around the blonde girl sitting next to her.

"My name is Candice Hantz, I'm 15 and a sophomore, I like Sherlock Holmes, and I dislike Justin Bieber. Do you want to go next Mo?" she says to her twin sister sitting on her other side.

"My name is Morgan Lopez-Pierce, I'm also 15 and a sophomore, and I'm Candice's twin. I like Horror movies, and I dislike my birth parents, sorry Candi" she says.

"No offence taken" Candice responds.

"Would you like to go next Raina?" Morgan asks.

"My name is Raina Evans, I'm also 15 and a sophomore, I like painting and I don't like big dogs" she says. She glares over at Candice and Sydney and I wonder if there's something going on there. "Would you like to go next Josh?" she asks.

"My name is Josh Puckerman, I'm 14 and a freshman, I like books and I don't like fish" he says. "Would you like to go next Leigh?" he asks.

"My name is Leigh Puckerman, I'm 16 and a Junior, I like dancing and I dislike movies that make me cry" she says. "Would you like to go next Eli?" she asks.

"My name is Eli Schuester, I'm 14 and a freshman, I like my dog Bella but I dislike being blind" he says, fondling his dog's ears. "Do you want to go next Skye?" he asks.

"My name is Skye Samson, I'm 15 and a freshman, I love my dog Holly and I hate it when people steal my cane" she says. "I can't exactly see anyone, so could whoever's closest to me just go next" she says.

"My name is Connor McCarthy, I'm 14 and a freshman, I like playing guitar, I don't like Math, although I think I might have been given a reason to like it" he says, smiling at Freya Hummel-Anderson and she tentatively smiles back. I can already tell there's going to be a lot of romantic drama in this club. "Do you want to go next Drew?" he says, turning to his twin brother who is sitting next to him.

"My name is Drew McCarthy, I'm 17 and a junior, I love my twin brother, I don't like the dumb jocks who think it's cool to throw slushies, I'm not one of those guys" he says. "It looks like you're the last one" he says, nodding at Hayden Miller, the angry guy with a big attitude that auditioned for us the first week of school.

"My name is Hayden Miller, I'm also 17 and a junior, I love my motorcycle, I hate my family, they're all jerks" he says.

"Right, that's great, you guys all know a little about each other, and hopefully you're all going to become great friends, like we did when we were in this club" Quinn says.

"We haven't decided on a first assignment for you guys yet, but we can tell you that we will be meeting twice a week, on Tuesdays and Fridays from now on, and we will try to schedule practices around your other extra-curriculars as much as possible, since we know most of you have busy schedules and we were the last club to be introduced this year" I say. "In the meantime, we've decided that we would like you to do a group song today, to see how you work together as a group" I say, handing out sheet music for the song Quinn and I chose.

"Seriously? This song is like ancient! Could you at least have picked something from this century?" Shay complains.

"This is a great song, and it's the song we have chosen for you, so you will do it" I say, calmly, but feeling as if I'm about to snap. I love all my daughters, but Shay really winds me up sometimes.

"We thought since the girls outnumber the guys by a fair way, we'd split you into Freshmans and Sophomores, and then Juniors, as that way the group sizes are roughly equal. So if the Freshmans and Sophomores go on one side of the room, and the Juniors go on the other, we've split up the parts on your sheets, so you should know who's singing what" Quinn says.

"Okay off you go guys" I say, nodding to the pianist to start. Carly starts the song.

Carly:

Well you're the real tough cookie

With the long history

Of breaking little hearts

Like the one in me

Brant:

That's OK

Let's see how you do it

Put up your dukes

Let's get down to it

Freshman and Sophomores:

Hit me with your best shot

Why don't you hit me

With your best shot

Hit me with your best shot

Fire away

Kennedy:

You come on with a come on

You don't fight fair

Jonah:

But that's OK see if I care

Freya:

Knock me down, it's all in vain

I'll get right back on my feet again

Juniors:

Hit me with your best shot

Why don't you hit me

With your best shot

Hit me with your best shot

Fire away

Connor:

Well you're the real tough cookie

With the long history

Of breaking little hearts

Like the one in me

Kira:

Before I put another notch

In my lipstick case

You better make sure

You put me in my place

Freshman and Sophomores:

Hit me with your best shot

Come on, hit me with your best shot

Hit me with your best shot

Fire Away

Juniors:

Hit me with your best shot

Why don't you hit me with your best shot

Hit me with your best shot

All:

Fire Away

Quinn and I hug each other after they finish performing, knowing that we picked a great group of kids this year, the kind that could be national champs.

"That was amazing you guys!" Quinn says.

"You certainly gel well as a team, but we've got a long way to go if we're going to make it to Nationals, and I want us to make it to Nationals, do you?" I ask.

The kids cheer, happily hugging each other after their performance. They already look like a team, and they've only been together one day.

"Alright, alright, we can celebrate later. Like Rachel said, we've got a long way to go to get to Nationals, and first stop on the way is Sectionals. The competition is going to be tough, so we need to start preparing now if we've got any chance of winning and we want you guys to win this thing because you can do it!" Quinn says. I smile over at her, so glad I've got this group of kids, and her by my side for my first year of teaching Glee. It's going to be a great year, I can just feel it!

A/N: I know, this ended up being longer than the last one, but this just felt like the length this chapter needed to be! I'm so sorry it took me so long to write, but it's a long chapter and I've had a lot of schoolwork lately, my exams are coming up, so I won't have as much time as I'd like to write in the next month or so. The good news is I have another chapter of Our Vow of Love in progress, I will hopefully be starting on the next chapter of Moving On: Senior Year soon, I finally have an idea for Back At The Start after over a year of nada, and I also have an idea for Loving Him Was Red, so things are looking good, it just depends on when I get time to get round to it all. I'd love ideas for assignments for this story, so I can get the next chapter underway, but hopefully this chapter will keep you guys occupied for a while! The songs performed in this chapter were, Lucky/The Lucky One-Britney Spears/Taylor Swift, performed by Carly and Kennedy Hudson, Call Your Girlfriend (Cups Version)-Robyn, performed by Carly Hudson, Change-Carrie Underwood, performed by Ginny Puckerman, Happy Little Pill-Troye Sivan, performed by Ginny Puckerman, Bring Me To Life-Evanescence, performed by Shannon Puckerman, Here's To Never Growing Up-Avril Lavigne, performed by Mara Clements, Brant Lopez-Pierce, Caroline "Skip" Mayfield, Seth Paisley and Kelli Westmore, Fallen Through-Skye Sweetnam, performed by Brant Lopez-Pierce, Listen-Beyonce, performed by Sierra Lopez-Pierce, Shark In The Water-VV Brown, performed by Sierra Lopez-Pierce, The Circle of Life-Lion King, performed by Sydney Lawson, If I Drink This Beer-Nashville, performed by Connor and Drew McCarthy, Not About Angels-Birdy, performed by Freya Hummel-Anderson, Nobody's Perfect-Hannah Montana, performed by Morgan Lopez-Pierce, Girls Just Wanna Have Fun-Cyndi Lauper, performed by Candice Hantz, Tale As Old As Time-Beauty and The Beast, performed by Candice Hantz and Sydney Lawson, You and I (Nobody In The World)-John Legend, performed by Josh Puckerman, What A Wonderful World-Louis Armstrong, performed by Raina Puckerman, People Help The People-Birdy, performed by Raina Puckerman, Come and Get It-Selena Gomez, performed by Kira Chang, Whenever, Wherever-Shakira, performed by Kira Chang and Hit Me With Your Best Shot-Pat Benatar, performed by Teenage Dreamers. Credit goes to Linneagb, who suggested the name Teenage Dreamers. Also, as I didn't say it last time, my OC's featured are Hayden Miller, Danny Wheeler, Henry Alexander, Skye Samson, Kyle Walker, Freddie Robinson, Chuck Baker, Jenna Cartwright, Sammy Reynolds, Sydney Lawson, Jackson Avery, Viola Barnes and Connor and Drew McCarthy. Hanna, Travis, Tyler, Kendall, Tami, Mara, Skip, Kelli and Seth were all sent to me as part of Brant's history, as was Jensen. Derek was sent as part of Josh's history, and Niko was created by Linneagb. Grant Williams from Remy's part of the last chapter is also mine. I hope you liked this chapter, and I will try to get the next one to you as soon as I possibly can, it just might take a while!

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