A/N: First, are you reading Dillwg's The Debate? If not, get over to his fic pronto! Also if you're not reading the (Mis)education of Sarah Walker by Zettel, you should, and leave Zettel a review (and possibly a hug, because he's getting deep). WillieGarvin is killing it with Chuck vs A New Day, as always, and Steampunk and some rando dude she found on the side of the road are working on rewriting the show. And finally, SalishaSea's Chuck vs The Fight will shake you to your freaking core if you haven't read it. Now, the reason you're here. To recap, Chuck and Sarah, given a mission in a winter wonderland during Christmas, and very clearly was given permission to be together…right? Oh wait, you say you looked up the NSA Policy 9-5-8a….well…how'd that happen. Ch 3, Spy Life

Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck, I don't own fluff. Really, I don't

Chuck sat quietly in the car on the drive to Sarah's. He wasn't sure what to say, but he did know what to do, he couldn't press her. That hadn't worked well after the kiss when the not-bomb that was Bryce didn't blow. He thought he might explode he was so excited. He also had never known a time in his life he had been quite so speechless.

"You okay over there, Chuck?" she asked. "You're usually quite talkative and I would think now, you'd be extra talkative."

"Trying to be cool about things," Chuck replied. Sarah glanced out the window. He defiantly wasn't being cool. He was nearly vibrating, and the smile on his face…it was almost a smirk and she really wanted to kiss it off. "Just sitting here, wondering if there's anything you want to talk about."

"I can't tell you everything," she said softly. "I don't know…I don't know how to do this, so I need your help."

"You keep saying this," Chuck managed to get out. "What exactly is this?"

"You think I know?" Sarah asked. "Before the CIA, I never had a boyfriend, and the only real one I guess I had I was fake married to so…"

"So all your relationships have been with those undercover," Chuck finished for her.

"I mean there's been other guys…"

"How about this," Chuck interrupted. "We've got a whole lot going on without talking about exes. SO how about we table that while we deal with….well, us."

"There's a major difference you know," Sarah said, looking at Chuck. "In the Andersons cover, I was fighting for us to be together, for us to be remotely real, to not lose myself to the spy life." She took a deep breath. "In this cover, I've been fighting trying to keep it becoming real for fear of losing you."

Chuck just looked at her, not sure what to say. "I don't want to lose you," he said, not knowing what else to say. He hadn't been this short of words in his entire life.

"God, this is a bad idea," she muttered.

Chuck swallowed, fearing the worst. "So, you don't-"

"NO!" she said, and winced as she realized she snapped at him. "Sorry, I do want to try it's just…you deserve better."

"I deserve…better?" Chuck was genuinely confused. "You wanna break that down for me?"

"I've done terrible things."

"Sarah, I've seen," he said, pointing toward his head. "I've read some things, Casey's told me things, although now I wonder how much I should believe…"

"Seduction?" She twisted her lips in amusement as she asked.

"Yeah," he replied, nodding.

"We need to have a loooooong talk about that, which also explains some of your reaction during the Lon Kirk assignment."

"I tell you I didn't fake a flash," Chuck replied, getting defensive.

"I know, Chuck, I know. Look, I'm talking about before I was in the CIA. Chuck, I'm broken." She paused. "I've never told anyone before but-"

"Wait, don't tell me," Chuck said, stopping her. She gave him a look. "Don't tell me because you're afraid I'll run off, tell me because you want to, because you're ready to share, or you need to deal with it, and I'm the person you want to, but don't tell me just to tell me."

"Chuck you don't understand," she began again.

"I've stolen," he blurted out.

"What?" She said looking at him. "When?" She paused. "If you're ready to tell me, that is." She smirked at him.

"When I was a kid Ellie and I used to go to the grocery store," Chuck began. "The store had video games in the foyer and I played them quite often. One afternoon, I wanted to play a video game but was out of money. I knew that if the machine took your quarter without letting you play your game, you could go tell the customer service desk, and they'd have you fill out a piece of paper and give you a quarter."

He was silent, and she glanced at him, and saw the shame on his face. She shook her head. "Did you?" He nodded. "Did you play the game?" He nodded. "Did you…..enjoy it?"

"God no! I had this sick feeling in my stomach the entire time, and I felt absolutely awful." Sarah snickered. He gave her a look.

"I'm not laughing at you, Chuck, it's exactly what I'd expect out of you," Sarah replied. "So did you tell someone what you did or leave money around the store to pay it back?"

"Both," he said in a small voice. She was fighting to hold in laughter. "I left eight quarters around the store over the next six weeks, and finally I felt so bad I found the store manager and forced him to take thirty cents which should have covered interest."

She gave him a look, reached over, and did what she wanted to do since this entire operation started. Whenever he looked miserable, she wanted to run her hand through his curls, and she did. He looked over at her, and the smile she had for him, nearly made him melt.

"This is what I'm talking about Chuck. I did terrible things."

"Sarah, it doesn't matter," Chuck said, shaking his head. "Did you have an Ellie in your life telling you how you shouldn't have done those things, or that you were wrong?"

"No, if anything, he was encouraging it," she admitted. Chuck raised an eyebrow. "You told me not to tell."

"Don't," he affirmed. "But that tells me so much, so you can't blame yourself. Look, I don't think there's any way you could be satisfied dating a guy like me."

"Charles Irving Bartwoski!" she began.

He threw his hands up. "What I'm saying, Sarah, is we both have insecurities." She set her jaw. "But, what if, we try and see each other through the other's eyes?"

"Chuck I'm such a mess."

"And I'm not?" She shook her head. "What if we tried, hear me out on this crazy idea, tried to be open with our feelings."

"I can try, only if you promise me that if I'm walling you out, you tell me," Sarah replied.

"Great," Chuck said, nodding. He was quiet for a second. "Why do I feel like this was more a negotiation?" Sarah shrugged. "I guess the good news is Ellie will be happy."

"That's your best take away, Chuck?" Sarah asked. Chuck gulped. "You really know how to make a girl feel special."

"Okay, you want the truth?" Sarah nodded as she pulled into Mason 23. "You're about as skittish as a newborn deer so I'm kinda scared to say anything."

She turned the car off, turned in the seat, and looked him in the eye. "I'm not going anywhere, Chuck. I've had my chances. I still think this is a bad idea for your safety."

"I have the best bodyguard in the world, and I'm not just saying that because you're my…uh…uh…"

"Girlfriend?" she offered.

"Seriously, I mean I haven't even had a second date," he grinned at her, and she couldn't stop the return grin.

"Keep acting like that and you won't get a second, or a third, or a fourth," Sarah replied. "Chuck, spill it, what is it that you're not saying?"

"Let's say this does work, let's say we can make it work, and one day they get the Intersect out of my head, then what?" Sarah sat there quietly.

"You really want that answer?" Sarah asked. Chuck nodded.

"You know when a President leaves office that they get their own security detail?" Chuck nodded. She was silent for a second, and then understanding began to dawn on his face. "You do remember that Beckman said this could turn into a long term assignment?"

"So your here after I get the Intersect out, if you want to be?"

"Yes, Chuck. Yes, I'm here, yes I want to be."

Color drained from Chuck's face. "Sarah, did we get spy married?"

Sarah was quiet for a second. "Maybe?" She said with a shrug.

-ooooo-

They got into the elevator quietly, neither sure what to say. Chuck stood beside her, trying to comprehend everything. She was going to be here…with him. That was hard to accept, and then her hand slipped into his. He glanced over at her, and she was staring straight ahead, but he could see her lips fighting, twisting into a smile.

"How about we each get five questions from the other, about present day or future info and we have to answer?" Chuck asked.

Sarah took a deep breath. "Okay," she said softly. The elevator doors opened and they exited together and walked to her door. She opened the door and he entered it behind her. He tried to gather himself as he heard her shut the door. He turned and found her hands grasping his shirt as she turned him and pinned him against the wall. A second later, her lips found his as they melted together.

A minute later they came up for air. "Something you wanted to ask me?"

"I really have no idea what it was," he replied.

"Liar," she said, grinning. "I know you, Chuck, and I know exactly what is on your mind."

"Oh, you do, do you?" She shook her head, disengaged herself from him, walked over to the closet, and pulled out her suitcase. She unzipped it, and studied the contents.

"This is my go bag, I keep it packed at all times. Everything else is stuff the agency has bought me that I need for the cover here," she explained.

"You think that was my question?" Chuck asked.

"No, but I'm sure it's rumbling around in that brain of yours," she replied, going back into the closet and pulling out a few dresses. She walked out and held each one in front of her, listening to the choking sounds Chuck was trying not to make as she held each one in front of her. "You sound like you like the red one the best."

"Is that red?" he asked, his voice an octave higher. "It looks more like a salmon." She glanced at him through her lashes as she laid down the other two, held the dress up with one hand, and lifted her hair up looking at the combination in the mirror. Chuck thought he was looking at a real life angel. "I mean it's alright, if you like that sort of thing."

She turned toward him, her eyes dancing. "I could put it back."

"You seem to like it," he sputtered.

"I think I'll take it, we might have to dance one night, you know for the mission," she said. "And even if we don't we might go dancing anyway. I never got to tango with you."

"I hope you know the male's part," Chuck said, shaking his head at the memory.

"Ask, Chuck." It wasn't a request.

"So, you're stuck here," he began.

"I am not stuck, I chose to be here," Sarah replied, going back in her closet. "And since you're avoiding the question about one Bryce Larkin," she said, noting his wince. "I could have left with Bryce, but I chose to be here. I did almost leave, you know." She was looking him right in the eye. "It was hard, what I was feeling and not allowed to have. With Bryce…" She took a deep breath. "Bryce knew me…well, of me. He knew me as a spy. You know me as Sarah."

"What do you want me to know you as?" Chuck asked.

She smiled. "See, that right there. That's why I didn't leave. If I had it would have been about the Andersons, about Bryce and Sarah, a great spy team but two people."

"Instead you don't have a great spy team," Chuck replied.

She shook her head. "Chuck, I am on a great spy team, it's a different spy team, but us….we're not two people, we're a team in real life. Before Sarah Walker was the name given to me by the CIA. Since I've met you, I think of myself as Sarah Walker, because that's what you know me as. Chuck, I'm not leaving with him."

"But you're stuck here."

"Chuck," she paused and gave him a long look. "I am not stuck. I don't know how to have a normal life."

"Why do you have to?" Chuck asked. "Hear me out, I'm serious. Look, I don't know what you call normal, but the things that seem to make you unhappy about the spy life are the things that others call normal. I know you'll never be an accountant, or a banker, or something like that, but you don't have to be. All I want Sarah is for you to be happy and I hope I make you happy."

"The next time you worry about Bryce Larkin, please remember that his belief is whatever happens, rule one is it's about Bryce." Sarah walked over and took his face in her hands. "That's why I'm here, Chuck. You make things about me, even when you shouldn't."

"There's going to be a talk about staying in the car, isn't there?" Chuck asked. Sarah nodded.

-ooooo-

"Ellie took that very well," Chuck said as they entered the plane.

"Stop looking gift horses in the mouth, Chuck," Sarah said from in front of him. "We get two weeks, a pretty easy mission, and time…together." She turned around and looked at him. "I'm looking forward to it."

"I do enjoy a good Christmasy mission," Chuck replied with a grin. She had a slight eyeroll, but he saw her grin. "Should we watch Die Hard to prep, you know since we're going after Hans Gruber?" Casey, who was bringing up the rear, grunted.

Casey slapped some folders in Sarah's hands. "You two study while your cozied up, I'm going up front with the pilot before you two defile the plane."

"No one had any plans to defile this plane," Chuck retorted. He froze, not for sure if he should look to Sarah for support on that or not.

"Maybe you should check with you spy wife, Mr. Carmichael," Casey replied with a smirk. He then walked up front, and slammed the door shut.

"Sarah," Chuck began.

"Not right now, Chuck, we've got a lot of real work to do," Sarah said, handing him one of the folders. "Hmm, no picture."

"Well, actually that's my question. Do we have mission A and mission B? A mission and a submission? How does this work?"

Sarah leaned against him. He started to turn to her. "A good spy can do several things at once, like read a file and listen to his partner." Chuck faced forward and began to study the file. "So I think we're just running two missions, simultaneously," she said, blowing a breath on his neck. She felt Chuck tense and found herself enjoying this new partnership. "Now can you find anything about his former marks that we can use?"

"Uh, seriously?" Chuck asked. "I mean it jumps off the page."

"What?" Sarah asked, straightening up.

"Sarah look at the women," Chuck said, pointing to very attractive blond women.

"Okay, I get we have the same hair color," Sarah conceded.

"Sarah, this report, it basically says he targets couples where the boyfriend is kind of…well..with a woman that's out of his league."

"OH, NO." Chuck looked over and saw a very irritated Sarah Walker. "You are not about to say that about yourself."

"Sarah, look, you are quite attractive," Chuck began.

"And so are you!" Chuck turned to her. Her eyes were blazing and she saw how serious she was. "Chuck, you are charming, charismatic, you have this smile that lights my soul, your eyes are full of life, and those curls…."

"My eyes are down here," Chuck said, and Sarah jerked her vision down to his face from his hair. "Okay, thank you. I get it. But we can use what others on the outside see."

Sarah was grinning from a file. "Look, here's one from Agent Roan Montgomery." Chuck flashed and then he looked at her, his eyes wide in surprise. "Before you ask, is it all true, it's probably worse than what you read."

"Wow."

"Roan said Hans enjoys splitting couples, and the more together the two seem to be, the more he pushes. Roan believes with the right couple Hans could make mistakes." She shut the file and grinned. She looked over at Chuck and saw disappointment on his face. "What's wrong, Chuck."

"You're gonna have to seduce him, and I'm really trying not to be jealous here but,-"

"Chuck, we need to talk about seduction still, but my belief is the more the woman rejects him and sides up to her man, the more likely it is Hans makes a mistake."

"So, to be clear, for the mission, you and I are going to have to be…close."

"So close," Sarah replied. "And to be clear, it's not for the mission." Chuck smiled at her, as she leaned in to kiss him.

A moment later he pulled away. "For someone who, and I quote, 'can't do this' you certainly are doing a very good job.

"Gonna be a lot of on the job training on this," she replied with a wink.

"I am here for all the practice."

"We have a lot of time before Switzerland, Chuck," Sarah said, leaning back in.

In the cockpit, Casey cut the feed. He flicked on his head set. "General, they've figured out the best way to get Hans off his game." He listened for a second. "Yes, General, I'll be expecting you a few hours after we land." Casey killed the comms, and leaned back in his seat. This was gonna be an interesting couple of weeks.

A/N: This should be fine...absolutely fine...hehehehehehe...next chapter:

He was in awe of the view out of the master bedroom. The mountains were covered in snow, the fire was crackling in the fireplace of the bedroom, and then he glanced over at the bed adorned with silk sheets. It looked like something out of a honeymoon suite. His eyes got wide at that thought and he snapped his head back around to look out the window.

The fluff gets turned up a notch..or four. Reviews and PMs are always welcomed! Take care, til next time!

DC