How I Met Your Squirrel Mother 3

I awoke in a laundry mat, a green ogre as myself stood there. Wait was this Fiona, the woman that left me and took the kids?

"Fiona?" I asked

Her face became evil, she knew I awoke. She grabbed me by the neck and threw me in a dryer.

"You scumbag, you left the kids too me and do you know the pain and time you kids went through?" She yelled.

"One, where are they it's night time. Two, how did you get in here it's closed. Three Why am I here. And four, you were the one who left me!"

"Well mister, your kids are 26 years old, they have they're own life. I work here. In my laundry mat. And finally, Because you a slob!"

I got out of the dryer, she gave me a pack of bandages.

"You'll need this" She said

"But I got some in my house."

"Shrek listen that woman burnt your house down and took anything remotely expensive."

I got mad and punched a washer.

"You got any bleach?" I asked

"I thought you said you stopped…" She said disappointed

I grabbed some off a shelf and downed what was left of it. I began to leave.

"Tell the kids I miss them" I said leaving.

I felt my chest, warm…probably from the blood. I sat at the curb and pulled out my bandages and reapplied them to my ribs. I got up, I knew where I was going the place, she said she lived…

I went to the only place she could be a tree dome…

I punched the glass water rapidly flushed into it. She ran out the tree weary astronaut suit. She saw me, she ran back inside. I followed, as soon as I got in, I was met with her shooting a sawed-off shotgun at me. I barley dodged in time. I took cover in a room. I had nowhere to go. So, I charged her knocking her to her butt. I grabbed the weapon and threw it away from us.

"Wait, Shrek! I'm so, so sorry!"

She hugged me, and all my anger left me…

2 years later

"And that kids is how I met mom!"

"I love that story." One of their kids said.

The others agreed.

Sandy walked "Cookies are are done!"

The kids flooded the kitchen. Shrek hugged her "I love you…"

"I love you too…" she grinned.

The End

P.S. None of this is canon

-Vader13289