The response I've gotten thus far for this story has really been overwhelming. There are so many different opinions out there on what Chuck needs to do to redeem himself, if he even can redeem himself, and whether or not he deserves to get back together with Blair once he is redeemed. With all those opinions out there any story touching that subject is going to differ from what most people think should happen. Your reviews have been very positive so far, much more so than I was anticipating, and I want to thank all you readers for keeping an open mind. I've really appreciated everything you've had to say!

This chapter took some time to finish and it's still not perfection (funny, yeah) but it's probably as good as I can get it without completely rewriting it. I'm almost certain a lot of people won't agree with some of the things that happen in this part but I'm hoping you can like it all the same.

So with that, here's the next installment!

Blair eyed her own reflection in the mirror and smiled slightly. She had a few minutes to herself before the room would be filling up with her mother, Dorota, the groom's mother and the bridesmaids. She needed this moment alone to compose herself. She was a little over two hours away from getting married.

She liked what she saw when she looked in the mirror. Her hair had been done that morning and looked better than it ever had. She had had her hair done up in fabulous hairdos before but nothing that even came close to this. She even liked the tiny daisies stuck in her hair, which had been her fiancé's idea. Her makeup was even more perfect than the hair, accentuating her features remarkably well without being over the top. She was classically beautiful, just the way a bride should be.

The dress, designed by her mother of course, hung on the other end of the room, waiting to be worn. It was a fairly simple gown, strapless and with a bit of a train but not so much that she would need to worry about stepping on it. Blair had wanted something that wouldn't be too warm. It was July eighth and an outdoor wedding in the Hamptons. A bride who sweated like a pig was hardly what she wanted to see when she looked back on the pictures twenty years from now. She wanted everything to be perfect.

She glanced at the clock. Two hours exactly. Two more hours and then her father would be walking her down the aisle to her groom. The man she had dreamt of since she was just a little girl.

Chuck glanced over at Serena and Nate as they came down the stairs. He couldn't believe his bad timing but chose not to comment on it. It was what it was.

He had gone out to the Hamptons for the weekend to get some rest and recharge his batteries, having just secured a business deal which had taken a ridiculous amount of work to land. He needed some time to relax and that was easier to do out in the Hamptons. Since he had inherited his father's house he decided to go there, figuring nobody else would be in the house. When he arrived he had been surprised to find Serena and Nate staying there. He vaguely recalled Lily having a key to the house as well and knew he had said he didn't care if anyone else used it, but he had been hoping to get some time to himself. He preferred spending all his time by himself these days. He had withdrawn from his friends more and more this past year and by now even Nate could go weeks without having a conversation with him, even though they still both lived at the Empire penthouse.

He had asked them why they were out there and an immediate silence had fallen, making Chuck wonder if they were rekindling their old relationship in secret and he had just walked in to a love nest. If that were the case then they wouldn't have a problem. So long as they stayed out of his hair they could frolic and fornicate all over the place for all he cared. But they weren't there to carry out a love affair in secret.

He had not even spoken two words to Blair since her engagement party and had in secret hired an assistant to filter his e-mails, regular mail and newspapers to keep them free from any messages she might have sent or any reports on her upcoming wedding. It was probably incredibly lame to do that but he needed to be free of her if he was ever going to be able to move on with his life. He had said his goodbyes to her and that was it. It took an inhuman amount of strength to keep himself from seeing her but somehow he got by one day at a time. He had even managed to get a filter on Gossip Girl so that no blasts mentioning her name came to his phone. Therefore he hadn't known this was the weekend she was getting married, or that the Hamptons was the setting for the nuptials. Nate and Serena had come out for the wedding and decided to stay at the Bass house to keep away from the madness over at Blair's mother's place.

Serena had told him about the wedding and then looked down at her feet as if her newly painted toenails were the most fascinating thing of all time. By now Chuck was a master at pretending like he could care less about Blair Waldorf, or Blair Corday as he supposed she would be after the weekend, so he had just shrugged and told them to not make too big of a mess when they tried their hands at cooking breakfast. Then he had walked past them up to his old room, cursing his bad fortune and thinking that having to know what day Blair got married was probably some form of cosmic punishment for everything he had done to her.

Now Serena and Nate were coming down the stairs, Nate dressed for the wedding and Serena dressed in a light summer dress which she would change out of once she got to the Waldorf's. She gave Chuck an apologetic look which made him want to growl at her. Could she please give it a rest with the pity for five measly minutes? No wonder he avoided her too these days.

"Well we're off" Nate said.

"Give my best to the bride and groom" Chuck replied.

He had not been invited, a fact he knew even though he was screening his incoming mail. Blair would know he didn't want to watch her marrying someone else and she wouldn't want him to feel forced to attend. If they ran into each other in the months after the wedding they would both pretend like the invitation must have gotten lost in the mail but they both knew the real story. And both were fine with it. Who would want their ex at their wedding anyway when they had had the type of relationship Blair had had with Chuck?

Serena eyed him for another moment, feeling her heart breaking for him. She could only imagine the pain he must be feeling. Chuck had pulled away from her even more since the night of the engagement party but that didn't mean she was unaware of his emotional state. Nate had mentioned that Chuck didn't want to know exactly when the wedding took place. Now he knew and had to spend his day alone with nothing but his thoughts and memories while Blair had her happy ending. Not that Serena was going to let that distract her from making this day the best of Blair's life though. She was way too happy for Blair's sake. It was just unfortunate that Chuck had shown up and found out that the wedding was happening today.

"Keep standing there and you'll be late" Chuck commented dryly.

"Let's go Serena" Nate said. "See you later, man."

"Bye…" Chuck said.

The door closed behind them and he walked into the sitting room. After pouring himself a drink, the first of many for the day no doubt, he stood by the large windows facing the patio and deeply wished he could have gone anywhere else but the Hamptons this weekend. He hadn't wanted to know when Blair tied the knot. Now it would be all he would be able to think about today. He didn't know when exactly the ceremony would be taking place so at any given hour she could have just become Mrs. Joseph Corday. It was such a definite event. The moment she said 'I do' would be the moment he irrevocably lost her for good. And that moment would take place sometime today.

She was still alone, but would only be for a few minutes more. Then she would never be alone again. She would be married, and Joe would always be at her side. Wonderful Joe who loved her spunk and her spark and who made her believe she could be a better person. Joe who had gone out in a dreadful downpour at night to get her macaroons, who had sung 'Moon River' to her the night he proposed, who had taught her how to make lasagna in the funniest, and sexiest, evening she had ever spent in a kitchen. Sharing her entire future with him was not scary, even though they had known each other about a year and a half. Instead it was perfect.

While she busied herself by the mirror, putting her jewelry on and adjusting the already perfect hair she hummed softly to herself a tune that had been stuck on her mind all day. At the rehearsal dinner the previous night Joe's seven year-old niece had sung for them. The young girl had had a beautiful voice and Blair had nearly been moved to tears by it.

There was just one detail that wasn't perfect this day. While she hummed the love song to herself she wasn't thinking about the man she was about to marry. Her mind was often on Joe but each time she started over humming the tune it was Chuck she thought of. Chuck whom she had barely seen at all in the past year and a half. Chuck who had used to be the groom in her imaginary weddings.

Perhaps it was just cold feet. A natural response to being about to bind yourself to someone else for the remainder of your days. She was sure she was not the only one whose thoughts went to a love gone by in those last moments before tying the knot. But her thoughts had gone to Chuck the moment Ellie had started to sing. Which was especially strange since the song had in no way been hers and Chuck's. As she had listened to it her mind had been full of thoughts just as the intention was, except the man on her mind was not the one whose hand she was holding. Her mind had gone straight to Chuck and she wasn't sure why. She had put him from her mind after a few verses and focused on the beauty of the moment and of Ellie's beautiful voice. Then she had remembered what Chuck had used to say, about how he found it creepy rather than endearing when children sang love songs about things and feelings they couldn't understand or fathom, and shouldn't at their age. The memory had made her smile and her mind had been back on him until the girl finished singing.

She hummed the first notes of the song again and let her fingers play with the pearl necklace she was going to wear. She remembered how she had decided once that on her wedding day she would wear a certain Ericson Beamon necklace and make sure her mother designed a dress that went perfectly with it. With Joe it was more classic pearls than diamonds and this particular necklace had belonged to his mother. Mindy Corday had given it to Blair to wear for the wedding, a gesture right up Blair's alley. It was beautiful. It was perfect.

"I have a love…" she sang softly to herself. "And it's all that I have…"

A smile played on her lips. Then she looked up from the necklace and met her own gaze in the mirror and suddenly the smile was gone. What was she doing? Why was she singing that song which for reasons unknown made her think of Chuck? This was her wedding day. The day she married Joe, the man who had been making her happy since the day they met. She had felt right from the start that he was perfect for her. Not just with the little quirks and likes and dislikes that made up a person but with the way he made her feel. He was happy, untroubled, there was no brooding mind there or troubled family or something else to create problems beneath the surface. He was someone she had a good time with, someone she could share her thoughts and emotions with, someone who had seen Blair Waldorf and loved what he saw. He may not challenge her the way other boyfriends had but he gave her the simple love she had been seeking ever since she split with Chuck around the time of Dorota's wedding. He was the prince who rode in from her dreams and showed her a relationship like she had never known. When he had proposed to her she had been beside herself with joy. That was the thing with Joe, happiness with him was pure happiness. There wasn't any sadness that came with it.

Then again that wasn't exactly true. She hadn't been completely happy. When Joe had walked in to her life Chuck had walked out and that was difficult. She missed him. She missed him so much that she didn't know how to put words to it. It didn't seem fair that she should have to give him up completely as a person in her life in order to have Joe.

Maybe that was the reason why she thought of Chuck now. He wasn't there to share the happiest day of her life. The one detail that made her wedding less than perfect.

"Right or wrong, and he needs me too…" she sang to herself absentmindedly.

The door opened behind her and she turned around, stirred from her thoughts about someone who wasn't going to make an appearance today. Serena entered the room with an excited, bubbly smile on her face, followed by Eleanor, Dorota, Joe's mother and the three additional bridesmaids. Blair smiled at them. It was time to put that song from her mind, put that man from her heart and put the past behind her once and for all.

For the next fifteen minutes she didn't have time to think at all. Everyone around her was chatting happily, asking how she was feeling, talking about how wonderful everything looked outside in the garden where they would be having the ceremony. Joe had somehow managed to find the priest who had christened Blair and hired him to perform the ceremony. Everything seemed to be in order and Blair got several assurances that she had nothing to worry about. All the commotion was almost making her dizzy and kept her from thinking or feeling anything at all for a short while.

Eleanor picked up the dress and walked over with it, whistling to herself which was quite out of the ordinary for Eleanor Waldorf-Rose. Blair's heart seemed to stop momentarily when she heard that her mother was whistling "I Have a Love".

"Mother" she said. "What is that you're whistling?"

"That song young Ellie sang at the rehearsal dinner last night" Eleanor said, unzipping the garment bag. "She's got a lovely voice for someone so young."

Blair realized her mouth was a little dry and she had a funny feeling in her chest. Nothing new, it had been there for a long time but she hadn't been able to put her finger to what it was about. Her mother brought her the dress and for a brief second Blair hesitated before stepping into it. She couldn't think about this now. She couldn't allow herself to think about it. Not on the most perfect day of her life. Couldn't there be at least one perfect day which wasn't ruined by Chuck Bass?

The preparations continued, bit by bit. The dress was zipped up and Eleanor fussed over it for probably ten minutes before finding every detail to her liking. Blair was given the jewelry and through some excited giggling Dorota removed the engagement ring from Blair's left ring finger and placed it on her right just for during the ceremony. It was a beautiful ring which Joe had bought had Tiffany's. Where else? Blair had loved it at first sight. It was the second most beautiful engagement ring she had ever laid eyes on.

Whenever Blair caught sight of herself in the mirror she had to remind herself to smile. What was going on? How could she be this nervous? Why was there a part of her that hesitated? She felt as if she had been keeping something at bay for a very long time and now it was starting to beckon for her attention. It had to be wedding jitters, nothing more. This feeling would go away once her father took her arm and walked with her down the aisle. The second she saw Joe she would feel nothing but happiness. She could live without that one small piece missing from her life, couldn't she? Anything else made absolutely no sense.

"You look wonderful, darling" Eleanor said and kissed her cheek. "I always knew my daughter would make a perfect bride. Just look at you!"

"Is like fairytale brought to life" Dorota beamed. "Princess has heart broken, fairytale prince comes along and brings true love."

"Dorota" Eleanor scolded. "Don't talk about broken hearts on the day of her wedding."

Blair smiled faintly.

"It's okay Mother."

"We should go make sure everything else is ready" Mindy said. "Not to mention get ourselves ready. Blair, we will see you when you come down the aisle."

"I'll stay" Serena said while the others got ready to leave. She smirked. "Somebody should stay with the bride-to-be, lest she gets too cold feet. That's what the maid of honor is for, right?"

Dorota gave Blair a big, warm hug and Mindy kissed her on the cheek. Then they left together with Eleanor and the bridesmaids minus Serena, who had brought her dress to the room and stepped out of her sundress to change. Blair walked slowly back and forth in the room, unable to shake the feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"Oh you look a vision B" Serena said as she shimmied into her bridesmaid's dress. It was pale green. Funny, Blair had always envisioned her bridesmaids wearing lavender. "I wish my mother was a designer" Serena continued. "When I get married my dress won't be anywhere near as perfect as yours."

"You'll be alright S" Blair said absentmindedly.

"If I can ever find some guy to marry, that is" Serena sighed. "Zip me up."

Blair walked over and pulled Serena's zipper up.

"I've been looking forward to this for weeks" she said. "The perfect day, the perfect wedding… perfect guy…"

"You guys are going to be so happy together" Serena said. "You deserve that. You got burned badly but you got through it, rallied and now you won the gold. I'm proud of you B."

"Yeah, I'm the Niki Lauda of love" Blair said absentmindedly. "S, You hear about people getting cold feet… What do you suppose that really is? I mean, what kind of thoughts are they having?"

"I'm guessing whichever thoughts are currently going through your head" Serena said before turning around and rubbing Blair's arms with a big smile. "Every bride gets nervous."

"I'm not nervous" Blair said. "I just… I don't know. I can't put my finger to it. Joe is perfect for me. He's the greatest guy I've ever known. A life with him… I can have everything I wanted from early adolescence. A fairytale brought to life."

"You want to know what I think makes you nervous?" Serena asked. "The fact that you will no longer be Blair Waldorf. But I think Blair Corday can be even more amazing."

Blair twirled the engagement ring on her finger without replying to Serena. The feeling in her stomach refused to go away. Why did it have to surface now? She had been feeling it before but never as strongly as she did right now.

She turned her head and caught sight of herself in the mirror again. It was as if something fell to place, some piece of the puzzle that had been missing or been ignored up until now. A key factor she hadn't wanted to admit to herself before. She felt almost as if a veil had been lifted from her face and she could see things much clearer now. She turned towards Serena, who had walked over to the dresser on the other end of the room and picked up the veil Blair was supposed to wear. That detail pushed her over the edge.

"Serena" she said. "Could you do me a favor?"

"Anything for the bride."

"Find Joe. I need to speak with him."

"Speak with him in an hour" Serena smiled.

"No I need to talk to him before the ceremony."

"Oh!" Serena hurried over to her purse and got out her phone. "Here. You can give him a call. Groom can't see the bride."

"Screw the groom not seeing the bride" Blair snapped. "We need to have a conversation between four eyes. You're my maid of honor so you'll have to go get him for me."

"What's going on B?" Serena asked suspiciously.

"Nothing. Everything's perfect. I just need a word with him. Come on, who believes in all that superstitious crap anyway?"

"Blair Waldorf."

Blair gave Serena her sternest look and Serena gave in with a sigh. She shook her head and muttered under her breath that in the years to come Blair would complain about how Serena allowed herself to be ruled by Blair while she was in a moment of bridal weakness, but the look on Blair's face had made Serena reluctant to pick a fight. She left and Blair sighed and took a seat by the vanity. She looked at herself in the mirror and wondered what on earth was wrong with her. She reached up her hands and unclasped the pearl necklace, placing it on the vanity in front of her. Her neck looked bare, but it was comforting.

Ten minutes later the door opened and she could see in the mirror how her groom walked into the room, looking very handsome in his tuxedo. In fact he looked perfect. No surprises there. She braced herself against the smile on his face and took a deep breath.

"Should I keep my eyes closed for this conversation?" Joe said with a chuckle, indeed with his eyes closed.

"No I kind of need to look into them" Blair said.

She could see his forehead wrinkle at the tone in her voice but then the smile was back.

"Serena said you needed to talk about something?"

"Open your eyes, Joe."

He did, albeit reluctantly. Their eyes met in the mirror and she turned around when she saw the look on his face upon seeing her and at the whistle he let out.

"You look…"

"And you do too" she said, standing up. "There's something we need to talk about though."

"Is there a problem?" he asked. "The caterers, the flowers? Your mother isn't driving you crazy, is she?"

"No" she said, shaking her head. "Everything is perfect. It's just… It isn't real."

He laughed a little.

"I know, it feels unreal to me too."

"No, I mean… Joe I love you but I can't do this."

To her surprise he smiled warmly at her.

"I think the cold feet are supposed to be there" he said calmly. "If you're not the slightest bit nervous then are you really aware of what you're getting yourself into? Take a few deep breaths, have a glass of champagne and think back on every wonderful moment we've shared."

"Joe… I've been on the brink of making a huge mistake. This isn't real. I will never be able to forgive myself for not realizing it until this late hour but the truth is I can't proceed with this. I cannot marry you."

"It is real" he said with a smile. "You're just afraid of trusting that it is because you've been hurt in the past."

"I'm so sorry" she said, shaking her head again. "Joe you have to believe me I don't want to hurt you." The memory of something Chuck had said to her at the engagement party came back and she almost let the hint of a smile show on her face when she realized how much sense the words made. "It's not because I don't love you. It's because I love you too much to let this continue. I wouldn't make you happy in the long run."

"Blair you're the only one who would make me happy" Joe argued, slowly starting to get nervous.

"We met at the best possible timing for me and the worst possible timing for you" Blair said, looking down at the ring on her finger which she was absentmindedly twirling. "I was trying to get over Chuck for the umpteenth time and trying to heal what he had broken. You were everything I needed. But I can't be for you."

"Yes you can. Everything is perfect. Isn't it?"

"It's perfect. That doesn't mean it's right."

"This is not because of some ex-boyfriend you've barely even seen in the past year and a half" Joe said. "Blair you're having cold feet and everybody gets them. Just… Let Serena come back in here and you girls can talk about everything you ever wanted from your wedding and you will get excited again. The nerves will go away. If not before then when we meet up there at the altar." His voice was starting to sound pleading and it was heartbreaking. "Please."

"This is one of the worst things a person could possibly do to someone" Blair said, slowly walking closer to him. "Especially when it's someone they love. And I cannot tell you enough how sorry I am. But Joe the one thing that would be worse is to go through with this wedding and bind you to a person who isn't what you need. It's been a fairytale with you… But fairytales aren't real. This isn't an Audrey Hepburn movie. It's real life."

"People don't realize an hour before their wedding that they cannot go through with it" Joe argued.

"I've felt it for a while but I was too afraid to admit it to myself" Blair said. "I didn't want it to be true. But I can't ignore it anymore. You're not supposed to feel like you are suffocating when you're getting ready for your wedding."

"Don't do something that you will regret Blair. We will be husband and wife, I know that in my heart, but if you let your nerves get the best of you then you will always look back and regret walking out on our first wedding. You realize the scandal it would be."

"You deserve better than this" Blair said. "Better than what I can give you."

"It's just happening too fast" Joe concluded, grasping for straws. "We got engaged after less than a year after all. If you need more time we'll postpone it. We can do the wedding whenever you want. This year, next year, the year after that…"

She took his hand and his eyes left hers and trailed to their hands when he felt her put something in his palm and close his fingers over it. He looked up at her with disbelief, clearly more in shock than upset right now.

"This doesn't make sense" he said.

"Thank you Joe" she said, voice quivering. "For everything. I don't expect you to ever forgive me for this, even though I know better than most people how much you can forgive someone you love… but please know how sorry I am."

She kissed his cheek and walked out of the room, leaving him behind. Part of her knew that she was a bit in shock herself over what she had decided to do, and that once the shock wore off she would be hit hard with the reality of what she had just done. But there was another part of her that was filled with adrenaline, almost excited. That part knew she wanted to get the hell away from there as soon as possible, preferably before someone saw her. Which would be quite the feat since the house was filling with guests and soon they would be stepping outside for the ceremony. She lifted up her dress to avoid tripping and hurried down the stairs. With a touch of luck she could make it outside before anybody spotted her. It was both cowardly and cruel to leave it up to Joe to let everyone know the wedding was off but if she didn't get off the premises now she would somehow be reined back in and probably married.

She made it to the back doors without being detected and stepped out into the bright July day, stopping when she felt the grass underneath her feet. She had forgotten her shoes. She scrambled back up the steps, opened the door and grabbed the nearest pair of shoes she could find, a pair of her own Louboutins she had left there a few days ago. She put them on as quickly as possible and closed the door quietly.

Across the lawn by the chairs that had been set up for the guests Serena spotted her. She nudged Nate who looked over, his arm falling from his date's waist when he saw the bride hurrying back down on the lawn.

"What is she doing?" he asked.

"She looks lovely" his date lamely noted.

"Oh!" Serena exclaimed. "She's running off."

"What?" Nate echoed. "She's leaving? She can't leave. She's getting married! She loves Joe. Serena stop her."

"I don't have to stop her" Serena said.

"You're the worst maid of honor ever" Nate said and gave her a nudge. When she only smiled goofily he handed his champagne flute to his date and sighed. "Fine, if you won't do it I will."

"No" Serena said and grabbed his arm. "Don't you get it?"

Nate most certainly didn't get it. Serena was holding him there while Blair hurried off in her wedding dress, going in the opposite direction of the altar. Clearly she was having a meltdown and Serena was too.

"She's going to him" Serena said, warm and fuzzy with the thought that maybe Blair's life had a different happy ending, one which would make someone else she cared about happier too.

"To who?"

"To Chuck" Serena beamed. "Blair is going to Chuck."

Blair wasn't going to Chuck. She didn't even know he was in the Hamptons. She just knew she couldn't stay and marry Joe. At first she just hurried off without knowing where she was going, just making sure to steer clear of the road since she didn't want any arriving guests to see the bride running off. By the time she slowed down to catch her breath, and catch her thoughts, she had gotten a few blocks and wasn't so sure where she was anymore. On somebody else's property, but if whoever lived there were currently spotting a woman in a wedding dress standing on their lawn they weren't saying anything about it. She began to regret having run off without changing first but she probably couldn't get out of her wedding dress without assistance anyway.

She couldn't believe she had done what she had just done. Leaving Joe at the altar, a man she loved. Leaving someone at the altar was tacky, and caused a type of scandal she would have never wanted associated with her name. Still she was mostly grateful that she had realized what was truly going on before the ceremony had been completed. She knew that no matter what the pain and humiliation now he was better off this way.

He was perfect. He really was. Perfect enough that she had let herself be blindsided and caught up in the fairytale of it all. Maybe that was the most perfect part of him of all, the way that he had made it possible for her to create her own movie in her mind, a perfect fantasy to escape into when the pain of her relationship with Chuck was too much and had been going on for far too long. Joe had given her the perfect set, the perfect co-star and written the perfect script. All she had had to do was tag along for the ride. But it wasn't real.

She wondered if she had ever really seen the man behind the Mr. Perfect title she had bestowed on him. True he had made her feel happy again, and she really did have strong feelings for him, loved him even. She did… but she wasn't sure if it was really Joe she loved. He had been honest with her about who he was from the start, there had never been any mysteries to uncover the way it had been with other men in her life. The problem was that Joe himself hadn't been as important to her as the role she wanted him to play, which he fit so perfectly in. The perfect white knight who came along and mended her broken heart, lifting her up from her sadness. It hadn't mattered much who he really was and what was in his heart so long as he could help her escape into her movie and get away from the pain of her reality. She really did believe that if she had met him earlier on in life, or perhaps even if she had met him at a later time, she would have seen him for himself and loved him the way he deserved to be loved. As it was though she loved a character she had created for a movie in her mind. The truth had been pecking at her for a while but she had managed to ignore it, up until today. When Dorota had called it a fairytale brought to life the true reality had become as clear as day. She had fallen in love with an image and a dream. Abandoning Joe at the altar was crueler than anything she had ever done before, but going through with the wedding would have been even crueler.

She did not doubt that Joe would have loved her every day for the rest of her life. And she was so well aware of how perfect he was for her. There was just one detail that marred the perfection. He wasn't Chuck. With Chuck life was complicated and she had wanted to get away from that. She had longed for simplicity and perfection. Since the day she first met Joe she had been putting on blinders ignoring the intensity of the feelings she had for Chuck. Who needed a screw-up like Chuck Bass when you could have Mr. Perfect instead?

On the other hand, who needed anyone else when you could have had Chuck Bass?

She looked around her where she stood on the grass, having no idea what to do now or where to go from here.

Chuck was nowhere near as drunk as he had thought he would be. In fact he had barely had anything at all to drink. It was one of those rare occasions when he didn't feel like drinking his sorrows away. He was tired of that anyway. Wasn't it time he grew up and started handling problems without alcohol? He had been trying the drink-until-you-forget method for over two years now and it hadn't worked. Maybe it was time to try something else.

Every now and then he glanced at the clock on the wall. He had been sitting on the couch in the sitting room for hours now, occasionally watching TV but for the most part finding that he didn't want that sort of distraction. His mind was working overtime and he needed to let it. He needed to try and process it.

She was probably married by now. The most gorgeous bride anyone would ever see, and even though he didn't want to imagine it he couldn't stop himself from picturing the smile on her face when she saw her groom at the end of the aisle, when she said "I do" and when she kissed her husband for the first time. There was something numbing about the pain in his heart. He had known this day would come. It just sucked so bad to have to know that today was the day he lost her forever. She was married now. Married. She was everything he had ever wanted and he had let her slip away. Or rather thrown her away. He wasn't particularly bitter anymore, it was his just comeuppance. One could not treat the person you love the way he had treated Blair and expect a happy ending.

He needed to realize that it was time to move on. On a logical plane he knew it. There would never be a Chuck and Blair again and they had never been intended to last for eternity. Blair was meant for Mr. Perfect and Chuck had absolutely nothing on that, no arguments as to why he would be the better choice or any reason why Blair should leave Joe for him. It was over. It should never even have begun. On an emotional level he couldn't accept it yet. He had been so sure that Blair was meant for him and he was meant for her. That being Chuck and Blair, Blair and Chuck was going to get them through just about anything.

He closed his eyes and leaned his head back. He needed to think about something else. Anything else other than the fact that the love of his life was marrying someone else today. That she was probably already married. He couldn't change it. He had to accept it.

Tears were falling down his cheeks and for once he let them. There was nobody here to see, and wouldn't be for a great many hours. How many times had he cried over Blair? Nowhere near enough to make up for the mistakes he had made. He let the tears fall and tried to take some solace in knowing that at least her crying days were over. She would never have a reason to cry again, except for happy tears. That was a good thing. Hopefully Nate and Serena kept their big mouths shut and didn't tell her they had run into him and that he knew today was the day of the wedding. Let her have her perfect day and be happy and never think about the person who was crying over it.

It was getting late. Hours had passed since Blair left her mother's house and she was still out walking, grateful that it was July and therefore she wouldn't be getting cold. She couldn't get back to the city because she had left without her purse so she had neither money nor credit cards. She didn't have her phone either so there was nobody she could call. That was mostly a relief though. Leaving her phone behind meant nobody could call her either. And there were probably a lot of people trying to call her today. People she wasn't so keen on seeing or talking to. Not to mention there was bound to be a Gossip Girl blast she didn't look forward to reading.

She had pondered asking someone on the street for some change to use a payphone but that seemed too undignified. She had also thought about walking into a store or a café asking to borrow a phone but for one she wasn't sure who she would call to help get her back to the city and for another she wanted to stay clear of people as best as she could. Everyone who saw her turned and stared, which wasn't such a shocker, but she would rather not be seen by anyone who recognized her. That, and she was sure she wouldn't be able to set foot in any place she walked into today ever again. She would always be the crazy girl in the wedding dress.

The song from the night before kept going around and around in her mind. It kept reminding her of Chuck. She knew it was pointless to even think about him. He had made it very clear that he had no intention of being in her life anymore. He never returned her calls or texts, avoided any social gathering where she would be attending and the few times they had seen each other since she'd met Joe he had barely said two words to her. She knew the reason why but she didn't quite think it was fair.

She had been hurt by the way he avoided her. On some level she knew that it was a lot for her to ask of him that he should stay her friend and be in her life while he was still in love and she had found someone new. But she felt entitled to ask a lot of him after what they had been through. She had told him six months prior to meeting Joe that her world would not be the same without him in it. She had felt his absence every single day, trying to deny to herself how much it hurt and how much she missed him. After all, why would the absence of Chuck Bass make a difference in her life? She had the perfect man and the perfect relationship.

If she had ever taken a moment to be completely honest with herself during her time with Joe she would have been forced to acknowledge that Chuck was still as important to her as ever and that she was not over him. She loved him like she had done since forever, it was like she didn't know how to be Blair Waldorf anymore without loving Chuck Bass. They couldn't be together anymore, they had needed time apart to find themselves and when perfect Joe had walked into her life she had put all her feelings on him. A lot of her love for him was most likely love for Chuck transferred over to the person who fit her life so well. The person she could have the kind of relationship with that she had wanted to have with Chuck. Easy, uncomplicated. And the more Chuck had stayed away the more time she had spent with Joe, wasting all her love on him when the one she had thought was meant for her did not want it, or at least was not there to receive it. It was another reason why marrying Joe would have been wrong. He was an escapist dream and a distraction. Deep down her heart had never let go of her previous boyfriend.

When they had gone their separate ways again after the Saints and Sinners party Blair had promised herself she wouldn't get involved with him again unless he made some grand gesture, put in real effort. Then she had met Joe and thrown herself into a new relationship, seeing him as her boyfriend within a week after having first met him. In hindsight going from zero to serious within seven days ought to have made warning bells go off in her own head, or at least in Serena's or Dorota's, but nobody had said anything to bring her out of her fantasy. By the time Chuck found out that she was seeing someone else she was already serious about Joe and the time for grand gestures had passed. So he had chosen to withdraw and let her win. It was the first time in a long time he had done something completely selfless for her and he had done it knowing that it wouldn't be rewarded. Letting her go was not going to make her come back.

She wondered where Chuck was now and what he was doing. If he was still hurting. Probably not. It had been so long since they had last seen each other now. Serena had stopped mentioning him and his undertakings which made Blair suspect that he might be seeing someone new. If he was she couldn't blame him. She had chosen someone else. He had let her go. He had done so without a fight and she had recognized that it was an act of love. After something like that he had had to move on. How could a person not? What was there left to hope for with a love for someone whose engagement you had given your blessing to?

Even so the thought of him made her smile. So she kept thinking about him while she walked aimlessly through the Hamptons, stopping every now and then to rest her aching feet. She was both hungry and thirsty but since she had no money she couldn't do anything about it. She needed to find someplace to go or perhaps get a cab and go back to her mother's. It wouldn't be pleasant but she had to return there sooner or later. What she really wanted to do was get back to the city and go to the Empire. She wanted to see his face, hear his voice. She wanted to be near him one more time and figure out what to do next from there. She could spend the night at the hotel, either in the penthouse or in any other room they had available. It would be a safe refuge for the night. Unfortunately she had no means of getting there and she couldn't even be sure Chuck was at home.

She stopped when she realized the surroundings were looking familiar. It took her a moment but then she knew where she was. It was almost spooky being there. Chuck's father's summer house, where she had only been once since junior high, spending the fourth of July there with Chuck the summer they were dating. It had been almost three years to the date since then but the place looked the same.

It occurred to her that this was where Serena and Nate were staying over the weekend and suddenly she felt like an idiot. Of course she would go here. Nate and Serena were probably back by now, probably had been for hours in fact, and she could spend the night with them. In all likelihood they would be shocked at what she had done during the day but at least they wouldn't judge. And they could help her figure out what on earth to say to her parents when she saw them next.

She bent down to rid her aching feet of her shoes and held them in one hand as she slowly walked up the grass heading for the patio at the back of the house. She could see it long before she even got close to it. It had never looked much like a patio to Blair, more like a balcony with a high banister, and with stairs on each side leading down to the grass below. In her mind it had been the perfect setting for a Romeo/Juliet type scene and she vaguely recalled having considered asking Chuck to do that role-play when they had visited here. The sun was beginning to set behind her and through the large windows she could see light flashes that meant the TV was on. Probably Nate watching sports.

The patio doors were slightly ajar and when she got closer she could faintly hear the sounds from the TV. It wasn't sports, it was a report on the stock market. Only one person she knew would actually sit and watch something like that, especially on such a lovely summer's evening. She felt a strange fluttering in her stomach, a mixture between nervousness and excitement. She couldn't believe it but apparently here he was. A smile spread across her face. She had been longing for him for so many months and through some amazing happenstance he was only about thirty yards away.

"Chuck?" she cried out, stopping a few yards away from the patio. "Chuck? Chuck!"

Nothing happened. Maybe she was mistaken. But even if she was, wouldn't Nate or Serena have come out on the patio to see what was going on? It had to be Chuck. She called his name again and then once more. Finally the TV went silent inside, put on mute judging by how she could still spot the lights from it.

"Chuck!" she called again.

The door was pushed open further and she smiled with excitement mixed with apprehension. She had no reason to think he would be happy to see her. She had no reason to think he was even there alone. He would never deny her to come inside and make a few calls, perhaps lend her his limo so she could go back to the city. But she hoped he would say and do so much more than that. She hoped he would have missed her as much as she missed him.

He became visible up on the patio, his hands on the banister as he leaned over and looked down at her. The sight of him made her wonder how she had made it through these past months without being near him. He looked as good as he ever had, clad in a white summer suit and with his hair un-styled, the bangs falling freely over his brow. She had missed the intensity of his eyes, the look and feel of his hair, the sound of his voice. She smiled at him, hoping he would smile in return.

He didn't. He stared at her like she were a ghost. He had finally gotten around to pouring himself another large drink and sipped it while lazily watching the latest news on the stock market. He had begun to reach a state where he was completely numb, finding it quite a relief from the previous pain. So long as he didn't think about her he could stay in this state, but it was difficult when so many words, sounds and smells reminded him of her. When he had first heard her voice calling his name he had thought he was imagining things, or that it was Serena or Nate coming home early from the wedding. Then he had muted the TV and heard her voice clearly. Thinking he was starting to hallucinate he had walked outside and looked down, now shocked by the sight of her standing there.

She was a vision in more ways than one and he couldn't for the life of him understand what she was doing there, on his lawn, on the evening of her wedding. She was wearing a wedding gown, a gorgeous thing designed by her mother no doubt, only it wasn't so pristine now. The lower parts of the satin gown was covered in grass stains, dirt and other things he didn't care to identify. Her face was flushed and she was clearly a bit uncomfortable in the heat. A few strains had broken free from her perfectly styled hair and were sticking to her face. Even though she didn't look immaculate she looked more gorgeous than he had ever seen her before. But she was not his to admire. Whatever she was doing there, it wasn't for him.

"Hi" she said, a quivering smile on her lips.

"Blair?" was all he could think of to say.

She backtracked a bit. The look on his face was difficult to read. She wasn't sure if he was just surprised or if he was unhappy that she was there. Chuck on his end had no idea what to make of the woman he loved standing on his lawn wearing a wedding dress. He wasn't even entirely sure it was real and had no idea how to react.

"Why are you here?" he asked after a moment of silence. "Shouldn't you be…"

He left the question hanging in the air. Blair smiled again, feeling how nervous she was. What had she been thinking, believing even for a brief second that he might want her there? Too much time had passed. Too much had happened. They had moved on from each other's lives. Why should he welcome her back, especially when she showed up unannounced wearing a wedding dress intended for another man?

But this was Chuck. And if they were meant for one another they would find their way back eventually. He would be waiting for her because he owed her that.

"I didn't go through with the wedding" she said.

"You ran out?" he said, looking a lot more surprised than he ought to be considering she was standing on his lawn in a wedding dress.

"Yes" she said. "And then I came here. I…"

She hesitated for a moment. His eyes travelled down to her hands, seeing her playing with her fingers in a nervous gesture. There were no rings on them anymore.

"I'm confused" he said, fighting hard against the hope that was beginning to well up in his chest.

"I ran away and now I've been walking around for hours not knowing where to go" she said, and he felt that glimmer of hope being crushed, realizing she wasn't there for him so much as she just needed refuge. "I came here, and I…"

"You need a place to stay for the night?"

"Yes" she admitted.

"How did you even know I was here?"

"I didn't" she said, seeing the look on his face change. "I'm not even sure how I ended up here but when I realized where I was it just seemed like the right place to be. And then I realized you where here and I..." She looked down at her hands for a second, bracing herself before looking back up at him. "I don't expect you to let me in. I don't even know… I mean… You're probably with someone else right now, right? Our lives have changed so drastically in these past two years and you must have moved on by now. Even if you're single there's no reason why you'd be happy to see me. You could be single for a million different reasons, none of them being that you still have feelings for me. You let me go… You were right to let me go."

He frowned, trying to make sense of what she was saying and figure out what her intended point was. His heart was in turmoil, one second beaming with happiness at the thought that she might actually have left her fiancé because she still loved him, the next grimly resigned to the fact that this had nothing to do with him and was about something else entirely.

"No there's no one else… But Blair what's your point?" he asked, sounding a touch harsher than intended.

"I don't expect anything from you" she said. "I know this is all a lot to ask…"

"Since when should you be worried about asking things from me?" he said. "If you need a place to stay then I'll put you up. I'm the one who owes you more than I can make up for."

"But I didn't come for a favor" Blair said.

"Why did you leave him at the altar?" Chuck asked slowly, holding his breath to hear the answer.

"For a lot of reasons" came the answer. "Because I knew before today that something was missing. Because no matter how happy he could make me… there's just something missing. I always… wanted it to be you. I must be a total bitch for standing here saying this to you and basically putting this huge responsibility on you to make my leaving him the right choice but I didn't leave him because I thought I could have you instead."

None of it was making sense to Chuck. What was she even trying to say? She managed to make it sound like she wanted him again while at the same time making it sound like she didn't. While his heart was telling him to just put his arms around her and take whatever she had to give his mind forced him to stay put. He couldn't go through that much hurt again if it turned out she wasn't truly coming back to him. And he couldn't take advantage of this if she was just having the world's worst case of wedding jitters.

"I left him because no matter what happens between you and I…" She hesitated again. "You've probably moved on. You haven't even been wanting to see me for such a long time. I know you must have gotten over me by now. So I didn't leave him for you. I left for me, and for him. It wouldn't be right to marry him when a part of my heart still wishes I was with you . I didn't think my day today would have a happy ending. But you're here." The smile was back on her face. "You're here, I found my way to you. So that gives me hope."

"Hope for what?" he asked, almost afraid to hear the answer.

"Hope for an entirely different fantasy to come true."

"I thought you had everything you wanted."

"I didn't."

"How come?"

"I love you" she said. "I don't think that's ever going to change. I don't think it's ever going to lessen. I love you."

Finally something seemed to register with him and she saw that look on his face, even if it was just for a second. That look she knew so well that meant he was feeling. His hands left the banister and he walked to his right, towards the steps leading down to the lawn. She stood motionless while he descended the stairs, stepping lightly but not making too much haste. He reached the grass and took a few slow steps before stopping.

"I don't get it…" he said, on the verge of laughing with relief but not yet daring to believe it. "That guy… He's perfect."

"I am so tired of that word" Blair said with a hint of a groan. "What even defines what perfect is?" She smiled and Chuck slowly took a few more steps towards her. "Is perfect the guy who loves Audrey Hepburn as much as I do? Or a guy who watches 'Breakfast at Tiffany's' with me twelve times in ten months even though the movie bores him? Is perfect the guy who always seems to know what to say or what to do to put a smile on my face or a guy who makes me smile just by being alive? Is perfect the guy got in trouble with his boss for spending a weekend in Miami with me instead of working on his latest case? Or the guy who got shot for me?"

"I don't know" Chuck said, stopping a few feet away from her. "I think perfect… is a guy who wouldn't ever hurt you. Not just a guy who would never want to hurt you, but one who couldn't bring himself to no matter what."

"I think perfect is an unobtainable goal" Blair said. "Nothing can ever be perfect. The only thing you can get that even comes close is in the way a person makes you feel. All this time Chuck… so many months without a word spoken between us, or a moment in each other's presence… I still feel it. I love you. Joe is perfect on paper but there's never been anyone else I've felt such a belonging with as you."

"I hurt you" Chuck said. "Over and over."

"You did" she nodded. "Then you let me go. You let it be my choice who I should build my future with."

"Is that enough?" he asked.

She didn't offer him an answer, just looked at him wordlessly. He reached out his hand and was just barely able to graze a strain of hair that had fallen free. She was so beautiful in her gown and with her hair done up but it was the look on her face which made her the most beautiful of all. He studied her in silence while he waited for her to say something. When she didn't he took half a step closer and let a finger touch one of the flowers in her hair.

"Daisies…" he commented. "You should be wearing peonies."

She laughed a little.

"Peonies don't go with the dress."

"They go with you."

She smiled almost bashfully and looked down at the ground before coquettishly looking back up at him.

"See?" she said. "I guess not everything was perfect."

"You look lovely. Even more than usual."

She walked the remaining two feet up to him and reached out her hand, letting it adjust his collar and then run through his bangs. The touch made him shiver.

"I don't expect anything from you…" she said again. "But I love you. Whatever you want to do… I thought at least you should know that."

She felt his hands land on her waist, pulling her a little closer. The touch nearly took her breath away. It had been far too long and when he touched her it was clear as day that whatever she felt for Joe he never made her feel this way. Every part of her that he touched seemed to come alive.

"I will love you with my dying breath" he whispered. "You know I will. But are you sure? For both our sakes… You have got to be sure."

"I told you that night at the Saints and Sinners party that I loved you but I need to find myself before I could be with you. Then I met Joe and I almost married the wrong guy. Whether or not you think this could work between us now I'm sure of what I want."

"I've told you in the past that I did the most dangerous thing I could when I told you I love you. But I'm not the one putting something at risk anymore."

"It's worth the risk."

"Are you sure?"

"I'd rather take the risk with you one more time than spend the rest of my life with another man, wondering what I could have had with you."

He closed the remaining distance between them, leaning down and kissing her in response. She kissed him back hungrily and wrapped her hands around his neck, fingers playing with his hair, absentmindedly realizing she had lost her shoes along the way but really not caring. She had forgotten how much magnetism and emotion there could be in one kiss. It was something beyond passion, desire or affection. A spark you could only have with one or two people in your life, if you were lucky.

"I can't believe I forgot what it feels like to have your lips on mine" she breathed when they parted for air.

"I'll never let you forget again" he mumbled back. "If you let me."

They kissed again, deeper and more urgently this time. A year and a half of pent-up longing and desire finally finding an outlet. He couldn't quite fathom what was happening. She was indeed there, in his arms, real as could be. Either he had died and gone to heaven, but since he had a strong feeling heaven wouldn't be his destination after death he doubted that this was the case, or she had through some miracle forgiven him. Maybe there really was such a thing as destiny.

"I love you" he said when their lips parted again. "Do you want me to say it again and again? And again?"

She laughed happily, recalling one of her favorite memories, the first time he had said those words to her.

"Or maybe you could just pinch me?" he suggested, grinning against her lips. "I'm afraid I'm having a bit of trouble believing that this could be real."

"What is so hard to believe?" she laughed, stealing another kiss before he replied.

"That once again the story ends with you and I."

"What's so hard to believe about that?" she smiled. "We both knew all along… If two people are meant to be together…"

"… Then they will find their way back to each other" he finished.

She nodded and laughed happily, meeting his lips with hers again. They broke the kiss and he rubbed his nose against hers. Sighing contently she looked into his eyes, not even seeing the beautiful sunset framing the scene, having eyes only for him.

They kissed again, his hands travelling over her back, and she reveled in his taste, that hint of the scotch he had been drinking. Even though she wasn't a big fan of drinking scotch herself she had always loved being able to taste it in a kiss. Especially in his kisses. It was part of him, like the way he tasted of orange juice in the mornings or the smell of his favorite cologne. She had missed all of it and couldn't imagine ever doing without it again.

"I love you" he mumbled again when they parted briefly for air.

She grinned against his lips and heard him chuckle happily. This was not how she had expected this day to end but it felt better than anything else ever could.

Gossip Girl here. Who would have thought Blair Waldorf would go from having breakfast at Tiffany's to being the runaway bride? Rumor has it she left the perfect prince and fled to the arms of her heart's true desire. Hope you'll have a happy happily ever after B.

XO XO – Gossip Girl

I personally feel it got a little… overly fluffy… towards the end. And kind of clunky at times. I was in the mood for something dramatic and I wanted to give Chair a happy ending (for once lol). So I toyed with the idea of what kind of things they might do on the show for a season finale or sweeps episode or something and this is what I ended up with. Hopefully Blair's decision to walk out didn't seem too out of the blue. One of the reasons why I skipped right from engagement to wedding was to allow it to be a bit of a twist without making it seem too weird that it wasn't built up over the engagement. If that makes sense. Anyways, I'm sure a lot of you have different opinions on whether or not CB should have gotten back together so write a review and let me know what you thought =)

This could be the end of the story. It's a pretty natural point to end it. I do have some ideas for what would happen in the aftermath but I'm not sure it needs to be told. Let me know what you think.

And thanks for reading, as always =)