Here we go, chapter three!

I don't own Percy Jackson or Harry Potter.

Percy monologues a lot in this chapter. He doesn't feel comfortable complaining/whining to any of his friends, but he needs to get it off his chest and a sleeping Uther is a good way to do that. And the point where he gets a hug is in character for the hugger is the point where I actually teared up a little as I realized just how badly I screwed up Perseus (and Harry) by putting them in this situation. Stupid Cerebus syndrome, making me cry.

*accesses inner mad scientist*… Percy will live, however.

Edited by Mellie Erdmann.

Chapter Three: The Burrow

The afternoon of the fourth of August, Mrs. Weasley left to do the grocery shopping. She instructed the boys to do the de-gnoming and Ginny to keep an eye on Uther while she was gone. However, as Ginny wanted to help de-gnome the garden and Percy didn't care to do it today, they switched places.

So Percy found himself sitting in the rocking chair in the tiny nursery as Uther took one of his numerous naps. He had pulled the chair forward so he could sit comfortably while watching the infant. Quietly he commented, "I doubt you know yet how lucky you are to be living here at the Burrow. Percival says Weasleys have been living here for centuries. I can barely make a family tree that goes two generations back, let alone a heritage reaching back hundreds and hundreds of years."

Percy leaned back. "Heck, you have a father who'll stick around as long as he can. Mr. Weasley is kind of odd, he loves Muggle stuff which I guess makes his job in the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office his dream job, but he really cares about you and your older siblings. I don't have a dad. Well, I mean, I do but I barely know anything about him. I can remember maybe him looking at me in the crib, but that's it. Though I guess I'm better off than Harry; he doesn't have either parent and his maternal relatives pretty much suck.

"Your mom is almost as great as mine, though I guess I'm biased. They'd get along great, I think. But I doubt they'd ever meet. Sometimes I worry that I'll never see her again… and that scares me a lot. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy here- got through a year of school without being kicked out, got lots of friends, got a spell on my glasses to help with my dyslexia, and those pretty awesome adventures my friends and I went on. But I'm just not sure if all of that makes up for not being in my own body, having to lie to pretty much everyone about who I am, and the possibility of never seeing my mom ever again."

Percy was quiet for a minute, trying to tone down his bad vibes. But he just was in a bad, well depressed, mood today.

"My parents were together barely long enough to have me, let alone any siblings. You have seven. Wow. I met the oldest two earlier this summer. Bill's pretty cool. I mean, yeah he works for a bank but he does so in Egypt with goblins and works with protective curses. So he's more of a security consultant than a banker.

"But Charlie's job is even cooler. He works with dragons in Eastern Europe. That is awesome. Though he does love Quidditch like Wood does. I mean, all your siblings love Quidditch but Charlie does most of all. He likes dragons more though. I'm not big on the whole flying thing. But I have to show up at Hufflepuff's matches to show support for my house and Gryffindor's to support Percival as he's the seeker for that team. Maybe I'll bring a book this year to the matches. Can't believe I just said that."

Uther just drooled a bit in his sleep.

"Speaking of Percival, he's your next oldest brother after Charlie. He used to be kind of a stick in the mud, but he's gotten better. I guess rooming with me this summer and last summer helped with that. He just got his first girlfriend- don't tell anyone I said that, though. He doesn't want the twins to know."

Perseus chuckled. "Ah, yes, the twins. Fred and George, the pranksters of not just the Burrow but of Hogwarts in general. They mean well, but they do tend to push the limits. However, when it comes to their brothers, only they are allowed to mess with them. It's heartwarming in a hypocritical way.

"Ron is Harry's age and the youngest of your big brothers. He's kind of hard on himself, but he's very loyal and willing to do what needs to be done to save the day. I guess he's the meat and potatoes guy of our group- nothing fancy or especially powerful, but needed to keep the rest of us balanced and to manage the stuff we miss. Basically he's a good guy who needs to figure out his true potential, even if that means losing our meat and potatoes in our group."

Percy thought over his metaphor before deciding, "It's a good thing you can't understand me, otherwise you would be very confused right now."

Uther was still sound asleep and didn't respond at all.

"Lastly there is Ginny, who is about a decade older than you. She's the girl of the family, and the youngest until you came along. She doesn't seem to be holding a grudge, however, in case you're worried. She hasn't spent much time with me- Ron told me Harry Potter was her idol growing up, so the idea of someone else being in his shoes has her kind of freaked out. But I have figured out that growing up with six older brothers has made her pretty tough."

Percy snorted. "One's fascinated by breaking curses, one loves flying and dragons, one tried to bring order to all the chaos around him, two are master pranksters, and the youngest boy loves flying, chess, and apparently adventures."

Looking over at the clock, Percy noted it would be a while until Mrs. Weasley returned so he decided to continue talking at Uther, this time about his friends.

"Okay, the first friend I really cared about a lot was a guy named Grover Underwood. I still miss him. He had some sort of muscle issue but when there were enchiladas for lunch you should have seen him run! Of course, between his physical disability and looking like he had been held back multiple times he got bullied a lot. So I defended him. That's what friends do.

"I'm friends with most of your siblings- I didn't spend a lot of time with Bill and Charlie while they were here. It was a Weasley family reunion, really, and I'm not a Weasley. I'm not even supposed to be in this world, really. I know I'm whining and sulking about this, but let's face it- I got ripped out of my life and body to live in someone else's body and to live the life they should have led. Plus I'm physically a year younger than I really am, which sucks. Plus the Mirror of Erised… it showed me a girl."

Percy struggled to find the words for this situation. "I'm way too young for a girlfriend, but I'm not too young to be friends with a girl. Or maybe it's that I'm old enough considering how I was somewhat convinced girls had cooties when I was five or so. Anyway, the point is the Mirror showed me my parents, Grover, and Annabeth- the people I should be closest to but one of them I've never ever met and another I can't remember meeting and two more I haven't seen in over a year now. On the other way, Harry is in a similar boat- he's trying to cope with living my life, a lie. Though at least he's not living with those jerkass relatives of his anymore."

Percy leaned back in the rocking chair. "Basically all those body switching centric episodes I saw on some shows growing up- there's a reason the switch only lasted for an episode. After that, you start developing an identity crisis."

Uther sniffled slightly in his sleep.

"Aw, I guess I'm depressing you. Sorry about that, Uther. Okay, happy thoughts. Um, friends. Oh, yeah, Draco Malfoy. I didn't really see that coming. He used to be a total prat, even a bit of a bully. But he keeps accidentally hinting that he has daddy issues. Plus your dad has darkly alluded to Mr. Malfoy having been a follower of You Know Who back in the day quite a few times, so he had some bad influences on him growing up. But getting friends that could string multiple syllable words together has made him a lot happier, even if he does have occasional relapses. Baby steps, huh, Uther?"

Perseus thought about who to discuss next. "Hermione Granger is nice- frighteningly intelligent and knows it, but rather nice when she's not lecturing everyone every five minutes. She and Ron butt heads a lot. I promised Draco and Neville to bring popcorn this year so we could eat it while they're fighting.

"I'm forgetting someone… oh, yeah, Neville Longbottom. We just went to his birthday party a few days ago. He's pretty shy and has worse self-esteem issues than Ron, but he's a good guy. Plus he knows a ton about plants."

From outside he could hear a few triumphant whoops- apparently someone had thrown a gnome an impressive distance. Shaking his head, Percy chuckled.

"I guess de-gnoming the garden is a pretty fun chore, but I wasn't really in the mood. Now, where was I? Oh, right. Cedric Diggory- he'll be a fifth year this fall and probably a prefect like Percival. He's reasonable but authoritative. Plus he tells the best stories about Tonks, a recent mythic Hufflepuff. Apparently she left quite the impression on her house mates- Cedric insists I'm the new 'hero' of Hufflepuff for the next seven years. Since I'm faking being the hero of the century and I actually did save the Sorcerer's Stone from You Know Who last year, he probably has a point. Other than them, though, I am not close to any of the other students, not really."

Percy sighed heavily. "It goes back to me living a lie. I hate that so much. I hope that Harry isn't having to do the same, and even though I know I should doubt that being real, I can't help but think that's the truth."

Uther yawned a bit in his sleep. Percy tilted his head bemusedly. "You're kind of cute sleeping, with your red hair sticking out everywhere like mine does. Well, Harry's hair really. Okay, okay. I keep being depressing so happy memories… Mr. Brunner's Latin class, of course. I'll tell you stories about the messed-up Greek and Roman gods, because boy there are a lot of them."

In the middle of haphazardly retelling the story of Odysseus' odyssey Percy sensed someone in the doorway. Turning his head, Percy saw an amused Mrs. Weasley standing there.

"Oh, hello, Mrs. Weasley."

"Hello, Harry. I take it you and Ginny switched jobs?"

"I wasn't in a very social mood," admitted Harry. "And Ginny seemed pretty keen on helping her brothers de-gnome the garden."

"Is anything in particular the matter, dear?"

"No, Mrs. Weasley," he replied quietly as he got up. "Just a lot of little things adding up to put me in a bad mood."

"Like?" she asked as she entered the nursery to check on her eighth child.

Moving the rocking chair back to where he found it Percy sighed heavily. "I miss my mom, my old friend, and my old life in general. Then I started wondering about my dad again- I didn't get to be old enough for Mom to tell me a lot before the switch happened. Plus sometimes I worry about how well Harry is coping living my life across an ocean and pretty much in the future. Culture clash, much? And I've been living a lie, pretending to be Harry Potter. I know it's necessary to keep your culture calm and keep me from getting killed by You Know Who's followers but-"

Percy suddenly found himself being hugged very tightly by Mrs. Weasley.

"You poor thing!" she said, holding him tight. "You poor thing!"

After a moment Percy relaxed and hugged her back. "Thank you, Mrs. Weasley."

"Oh, Perseus, it's no trouble. I'm just sorry that I didn't realize just how hard all of this has been on you. This isn't your world or fight, after all."

"That, that doesn't make it any less important. Besides, it feels like whining to complain. I mean, I lasted a school year without getting kicked out, there are people who I can just be really me around who are among the greatest friends I could have, I'm learning how to be an actual wizard, and overall life is pretty good here. It's just sometimes I miss my old self and life."

"Of course you do," Mrs. Weasley commented. "Your old life would have to be quite horrid if you didn't."

"Yeah. That's why I'm worried that since Harry probably didn't have a clue he was a wizard like I didn't know I was a whatever I was, he doesn't really miss his old self and life."

Mrs. Weasley frowned but kept hugging Percy. "That's a worryingly good point, Perseus, considering what you told us about how his relatives treated Harry. But I'm sure Dumbledore will find a way to get you two back to normal. He's Dumbledore, after all."

"Right," agreed Percy. "And Mrs. Weasley?"

"Yes, dear?"

"Thank you for letting me stay here."

"Of course, Perseus. Come on, you can set the table for luncheon while I make dinner."

Quietly Percy wiped at his eyes a little as he followed the plump redhead to the small but lively kitchen. She had already put away the groceries and turned on the radio to some talk show. As he set out eight plates, Percy looked over at the clock on the wall that showed what the Weasley family members were up to at any given time. Mr. Weasley was at work, Mrs. Weasley was at home, Bill and Charlie were also at work, the middle five children were playing, and Uther was sleeping.

"It's a nice clock, isn't it? Arthur gave it to me for our seventh anniversary… of course, it had much fewer hands back then," Mrs. Weasley smiled as with a wave of her wand some knifes started to cut some vegetables. While filling the cauldron over the fire with water she asked, "Did Uther wake up at all?"

"No, he slept very soundly. I guess my rambling kept him asleep," Percy reported as he got out a bunch of silverware.

"Indeed. I hope Percival listened to me when I suggested they reread Lockhart's commentary on de-gnoming before starting. He knows more about gnomes than anyone."

"Uh-huh," went Percy weakly. He well remembered Percival's look of utter disgust at the book entitled Gilderoy Lockhart's Guide to Household Pests. Not that he could blame him- the admittedly good-looking blonde wizard's cheeky winks filled Perseus with aggravated doubt at Lockhart's ability. Lockhart seemed rather sleazy to Percy, and he was glad Percival shared his opinion. Not that he could say that to Mrs. Weasley.

Thankfully Mr. Weasley entered at that moment, looking rather travel worn with his dusty rust brown robes. He sunk into the nearest kitchen chair, taking off his glasses. As he groped for the teapot he told his wife wearily, "What a day. Several raids and Mundungus Fletcher tried to hex me while I had my back turned…"

Percy pushed a teacup over to him as Mr. Weasley got a grip on the teapot. As he poured his tea Mrs. Weasley commented bemusedly, "Yet I suspect you'll be tinkering with that Ford Angelina in the garage after dinner despite the long day."

"It's a way to unwind," he defended himself, taking a sip of the unaltered tea. Pensively he conceded, "Though if I ever raid the Burrow, I'd have to put myself under arrest."

"Then don't do it," Mrs. Weasley suggested, dumping the vegetables into the hot water. "Percy, could you get me the chicken broth?"

"Sure, Mrs. Weasley," he nodded, getting the broth and handing it over to her.

"How was your day, Perseus?"

"All right- I finished the last of my school homework in the morning and this afternoon I watched Uther and rambled a lot."

"About…?"

"Oh, this and that. I ended up telling him a lot of the Greek myths."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah," nodded Perseus. "I was actually supposed to take a Latin field trip into the Big Apple the day Harry and I switched."

"The Big Apple?"

"New York City." Percy snorted. "You'd love it, Mr. Weasley. Lots of Muggle technology and history."

"Don't encourage him," Mrs. Weasley shook her head, but she was smiling.

Percival, the twins, Ron, and Ginny came in then, having realized their father's return. After a few more minutes, dinner began.

As they ate, Mrs. Weasley commented, "I still don't understand why you keep tinkering with that old car, Arthur."

"Well, dear, I want to see how it works. It's quite fascinating."

"There are probably lots of books in a library that would help with that," noted Percy. Everyone looked at him.

"What? I'm not turning into Hermione, promise. All I'm saying is that a lot of Muggles also really like cars and how they work and some even have car collections. So Mr. Weasley isn't exactly alone in wanting to mess with a car in his free time."

"See?" grinned Mr. Weasley. He muttered to himself, "I'll have to find the closest decent-sized Muggle library… hm…"

Mrs. Weasley gave Percy a look. Sheepishly he said, "Well, he's not. I can't defend the rubber ducky thing though, not unless he's a Muppet."

"A what?" laughed Percival.

"A Muppet, that's a sort of- never mind. It's just yet another culture clash thing," Percy sighed, going back to his vegetable and turkey stew.

After dinner they had strawberries and cream. Percival went up to his room after that to write yet another letter to Penelope but Percy stayed with the rest of the family to make up for his earlier moodiness.

"What is up with Percival spending so much time in you two's room lately?" George asked Percy. With a playful shrug Percy fudged, "He's a teenager."

The twins laughed and seemed to accept this assessment. So when Percy did go upstairs to go to bed, he warned Percival, "If the twins start teasing you about being an antisocial, moody teenager just remember they still don't know about you and Penelope."

Flopping down onto his bed, Percy felt slightly reassured from Mrs. Weasley that under the circumstances his odd bout of moodiness was entirely normal even without Harry having hit puberty yet. But overall, life in the Burrow was great. Nonetheless Percy was pretty excited to be going back to Hogwarts in less than a month.