A/N: Thank you to Marlena516 and StoryPainter over at Project Team Beta for their magical beta skills.

Chapter 3: Resigned

Sam's POV:

There was no way in hell I was going to change a single thing in my life for that little leech-lover. No way. I had given up enough of the things I wanted for myself in order to stay in La Push and lead the pack. I wasn't about to give in on this. My life should have gone back to normal with the Cullens gone — as normal as a wolf's life could be, anyway. But, no. Bella Swan had to come along and fuck it up for me. The elders said that once the imprint was made, it was irreversible, and it would be painful to stay away from her.

I call bullshit.

There was no force on earth that could make me want to spend time with the Swan girl, and I was going to prove it. I figured I just had to stay busy, keep my mind occupied, and stay as far away from her as I could. Out of sight, out of mind.

The first few weeks after I imprinted were bearable. I worked during the morning doing maintenance and some construction around the Rez. It wasn't a job I particularly cared for, but the council offered it to me after my first phase. I guess they figured they had to provide me some kind of living, seeing as I had to give up a full football scholarship to stay in La Push and protect my people.

Then, I would sleep in the afternoon until it was my turn to run patrols at night. There were only three of us in the pack, so Jared, Paul, and I took turns patrolling the forests around La push and Forks, looking for any sign of vampire activity. With the Cullens gone, things were pretty quiet, so I let Jared and Paul have the daytime shifts. They were still in school and needed to stay on a decent schedule. It also had the added bonus of keeping them from nosing around in my head. Besides, I enjoyed the quiet solitude of running patrol at night. At least I used to, until I was given the "reward" of imprinting.

Yeah, fucking right, I grumbled to myself. I don't see how being stuck with a vampire lovin' little pale-face is supposed to be a good thing.

I was doing okay. Staying busy and avoiding all thoughts of Bella Swan was working for me, but it was tough during the quiet nights not to let my mind drift to thoughts of her. It was like my body had this physical need to know where she was and if she was safe — even though my mind didn't give a shit. And, anyway, I knew she was all right. She had Charlie looking out for her and the vamps were gone, so in my mind, it was all good. No worries.

Then mid-October, about a month after I found Bella on the forest floor, I learned how wrong I was. That's when I decided to mix things up. I don't know why I decided to change my routine. It was an innocent enough decision, and I certainly didn't think it would change everything else in my life — but it did. I had been pretty much sticking to a set route when I patrolled, running the border of La Push and then waiting until almost daylight to do my circle around Forks. But on that particular night, I chose to do my sweep of Forks a little earlier than normal, and that's the reason I first heard them.

Bloodcurdling, heart-wrenching screams.

Now, human ears probably wouldn't have been able to hear them — seeing as her window was shut tight — but with my wolf abilities, they were loud and clear. And, I don't know if it was the anguish I heard in her cries or the fact that my body seemed to be hard-wired to want to protect her, but her screams left me completely wrecked. All I could think about at that moment was getting to her and doing something … anything to help her. In a flash, I was at her house, phased into human form, and up in the tree outside her bedroom window ready to bust in — if that was what it took to get to her. Then I heard Charlie's heavy footsteps approaching.

"Bella?" he called frantically.

Charlie's voice broke through whatever compulsion I was under, and I froze, watching with my sharp wolf vision as he opened the door and looked around for some unseen intruder. His posture relaxed, and he sighed when he realized the only bad guy doing Bella harm was the one in her dreams.

"Honey, it's okay. It was just a dream. You're safe," he assured her, shaking her gently by the shoulder.

She awoke and bolted upright, repeating Charlie's action of looking hurriedly around the room before she realized she had only been dreaming.

"Oh." She sighed and slowly laid back down on the bed. "Sorry, Dad."

"S'okay," he said, standing there awkwardly, obviously not sure what to do. He hesitated before saying goodnight and leaving the room, slowly pulling the door closed behind him.

That was the moment when things changed for me. I couldn't have moved from that tree if ten vampires had been circling below. I knew in my bones that there was something wrong with my imprint, and even if my mind didn't really care what her problem was, I knew I wouldn't have a moment's peace until I found out what was wrong. I sat in that tree and watched her the rest of the night. She never went back to sleep. She just lay there perfectly still, curled around her pillow, and staring at the wall, waiting for morning to come.

What's wrong with this chick? I wondered. She should be relieved the bloodsucker is gone, not losing sleep over it.

That was when my surveillance of Bella Swan began. Even as crazy as I thought she must be, I became fascinated with figuring out what was going on with her. The elders were right; I couldn't stay away. I came back every night, and every night was a repeat of the previous. Every night she screamed herself awake and then lay there staring at the wall. And every night, I sat in the tree outside her window staring at her. I memorized each freckle on her nose, noticed every curve of her small body, and counted every breath she took.

I felt like a creeper, watching her like that, but it didn't stop me. After a while, I began following her during the daylight hours, too. I snuck away to observe her anytime I could. I learned her routine—which never altered—and noticed that she never talked to anyone but Charlie and even then, only when she had to. I noticed other things too—like the dark circles under her eyes, and how she was letting herself waste away. Her behavior was pissing me off.

She's pathetic, I thought angrily. Doesn't she care about anybody but herself? Doesn't she see what she's doing to Charlie? How worried he is?

By November, I just couldn't take watching it any longer. When her bony ass got the cart stuck in the middle of the parking lot, I just couldn't watch one more minute of her little freak show. That klutz couldn't even cross the parking lot without an epic fail.

I admit, maybe I handled the situation a little badly. I didn't mean to scare her; I was just frustrated. After weeks of watching her act like a zombie, I had had enough. And I think she had been about to call me out on that shit, too — show a little backbone for once — but then our eyes met, and she remembered me from that night. That was when all hell broke loose.

I could see the panic on her face, her eyes glazing over before she wrapped her arm around herself and clung to the cart. She was losing her shit, and I was the asshole who had caused it.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuckity-fuck!

I didn't know what to do. I had never had to deal with emotional shit. My dad had left when I was just a kid, and it had only ever been me and my mom. And she was tough, ya know? I mean, after my dad left, I heard her cry at night. But after a while, she moved on…

And that was when it hit me — I had never, not once, seen Bella cry. She was carrying all that pain with her all the time, never letting it go.

I don't get it, I tried to reason. Why is she holding it in? Who does she think she's protecting … Charlie? She needed to let it go, 'cause I know that shit's gotta hurt — it took me years to get over my dad leaving. Fuck! I'm such a tool. Why didn't I see this before?

I had to figure out how to calm her down and make this right before she had a total meltdown. I knew I could be what she needed. That was what the imprint was all about — being what she needed me to be. I followed my instincts and reached out for her, and I could tell right away that was the right decision. She relaxed instantly at my touch, and as soon as my skin was on hers, I felt drawn to her. I stepped as close as I dared, not wanting to scare her further. I bent down and told her it was going to be all right.

I watched the affect my voice had on her. Her breathing slowed, her posture relaxed, and her eyes slowly opened. It was amazing how I affected her — the power I had over her. I had been under the assumption that this imprint business was a one-way street, with me playing the fool.

It's not all about me, I deduced. She needs me ,too.

Harry was right. Fighting the imprint only caused pain, and so far she was the one feeling it.

I don't have to like the girl to help her out, I figured. I'll just help her through this rough patch. I would do it for anyone —even her. I'm not a total douche.

Once she had herself under control, I helped her load her groceries into her truck and made sure she drove off all right. It was hard to let her go. As soon as she disappeared down the street, I became anxious. I was the Alpha, so I tended to want to take charge and get the job done, no messing around. If it had been one of the pack acting stupid like her, hurting himself for no reason, I would have just knocked some sense into him. But with her, I was going to have to be careful. I knew she needed me, but I also knew if I wasn't careful, I could scare her off.

I had to figure out a way to ease into her life without seeming like a stalker. I was going to need help, and even though it felt a little like eating crow, I was going to have to go to the elders to get it. They were the only ones who knew my situation, and they seemed pretty tight with Charlie. Maybe they could find a legitimate way to get me close to her.

Fuck it, I thought, and turned to head back to the reservation. Here goes nothing.