Disclaimer: I still don't own Gilmore Girls.
A/N: This chapter is intense and I hope that you'll still want to read the story when you've read it. I promise that the story will start moving at a faster pace in the next chapter, that has both Dean/Jess and Rory/Jess interactions. From there the story will have a lighter side to it and it will not be as constantly dark as it is now. So hopefully you'll still be interested.
A special thanks to my awesome beta HelloSunshine89, the story would be lost without you. Thank you for making it readable. And thanks to all of you who has reviewed the story, it really feeds my inspiration.
Chapter 3 – Fight face on the backstreets
Luke had set his alarm for eight but he didn't really need it. Early mornings at the diner had made him practically incapable of sleeping past seven in the morning.
He got dressed and ate breakfast in a small coffee shop across the street from the motel. The food seemed bland to him and he had trouble swallowing it, his nerves flying all over the place. After forcing himself to eat half of his egg white omelet, he quickly paid for his food and walked to his car.
Once he found the police station, he parked his car in their small parking lot but made no move to get out. Twenty minutes passed while he tried to gather the courage…the courage to go inside. People were passing him on the sidewalk and, for a moment, he wondered if they were as happy as they seemed. Most of them were walking in the sun, laughing and talking.
Tearing his eyes away from the passing people, he took a deep breath. It didn't seem fair to him that they were smiling and laughing. Not when his life was suddenly surrounded with so much misery.
He had dreaded this moment ever since he got the phone call. How was he supposed to act towards Jess? Would Jess be happy to see him? Would he come with him willingly? Did he even know that Liz had kicked him out? Would he even remember Luke? The last time they had seen each other Jess had been four years old.
He remembered the few times he had talked to Liz on the phone over the last few years- birthdays and major holidays, mostly. She never called him; it was always Luke that had made the effort to get in touch. She never mentioned Jess and only talked about him when asked directly.
Luke cursed himself for not asking to talk to Jess personally. Maybe there was something he could have done to stop this. He knew it was stupid to think like that but he felt like he had failed Jess. Deep down inside he couldn't shake the feeling that some of this was his fault.
Briefly, he wondered if Jess had gotten the money he'd been sending over the years. He doubted it. No, he knew Liz kept it for herself.
That was why he had set up a fund for Jess years ago. Every month he tried to set some money aside in case he would need it one day, for college, maybe. He was sure that Liz hadn't started a college fund and Luke just wanted the kid to have a fighting chance.
Taking a deep breath, he opened the car door and got out, quickly crossing the parking lot before he had a chance to chicken out. The sun was blazing and it was a beautiful summer day, but he didn't notice. To him the sun felt like fire, burning away on his skin. And the dry air made it hard for him to breathe.
When he got inside the station he walked up to the counter and waited for someone to come and help him. He looked around and shuddered at the thought of his nephew having to spend so much time here. In the room was what looked like three junkies and two prostitutes. All he could do was hope that Jess had a cell to himself.
An officer walked up to him and tapped him on his shoulder. "Excuse me, can I help you with something?" The man looked and sounded tired.
"Yes sir, I'm Luke Danes and I'm here to pick up Jess Mariano." His voice cracked while he spoke and the words seemed to run together.
At his words the officer's eyes lit up. "Ah yes, finally. Poor kid has been there for over two days now. Do you want to see him while I get the paperwork in order?"
He spent two days alone here in a cell? Luke could feel his heart break. "Yes, that would be good. Umm, will he be forced to go to court?" Luke asked, trying his best to stay calm.
"No, the charges were dropped as the owner of the store took pity on him." The officer stood there silent for a while. He seemed to be thinking about something.
"He may have to testify against Bob later but a date has not been set for the trial yet. His mother posted the bail for Bob so I think it's a good idea that you're taking Jess to Stars Hallow. Bob seemed really angry when we brought him in and was yelling at Jess about disciplining him again once he got out."
Luke tried to digest all the information. "Liz came down here?" Now Luke was the one sounding tired.
"Oh, you didn't know…" the officer trailed off. "…of course you didn't. She came down here and begged Jess to drop the charges against Bob and then told us that you were now Jess' legal guardian."
The officer led him to the cell area of the station and left the two of them there alone to talk while he got working on the release papers.
The two of them just stood there and looked at each other for what felt like years. Luke was shocked at how bad Jess looked. His face was purple, covered in cuts and his left eye was slightly swollen. He had his arm in a cast and he looked miserable.
Luke had tried to picture what he would look like but this… it was so much worse than he ever could have imagined.
Finding his words he took a step forward. "Oh Jess, I'm so sorry." His was voice soft and gentle.
Jess' eyes shot up, locking with Luke's and he could only see sincerity in them. At that moment he let his emotions out and the tears he had been holding back for so long started to fall down his cheeks.
Luke panicked and started to yell after someone that worked there. "Can someone come in here and open the goddamn door?"
The same officer he had talked to moments earlier ran in and when he saw the boy standing, alone, in the cell, crying, he quickly opened the door. Luke closed the distance between them in quick strides and embraced his nephew, making sure he didn't hurt his already injured body.
They stood there until Jess's tears had stopped falling, neither saying anything.
Jess looked up at what he guessed was his uncle. "Thanks," he managed, with a broken and horse voice. At that moment Luke felt very protective of Jess and if he ever met the scumbag that had hurt him, there would be hell to pay.
When the paperwork was done they walked to Luke's car in silence. Luke didn't know what to say. He didn't know how Jess would react when he told him he was moving to Stars Hollow.
When they were seated in the car Luke turned to him and took a deep breath. But before he could get the words out Jess spoke.
"Can we stop by the apartment so I can get my stuff right away? I don't have that much so it should all fit on the truck. I just don't want to give Liz the chance to burn it." He was looking out the window and there were no emotion in his voice.
"Yeah, sure, just tell me the address and how we get there." Luke said as he put the car in gear and pulled out of the parking lot.
Once inside the apartment Luke felt his anger well up again. The place was dirty and it reeked of old food, alcohol and vomit. There was garbage everywhere and barely any furniture.
The apartment was empty and both boys drew a sigh of relief, neither in the mood to deal with Liz right now.
Jess went to the kitchen and grabbed a pack of trash bags and started to put all his things in them. He gave Luke his duffle bag and asked him to start packing his clothes before grabbing a pair of clean pants and a shirt to change into.
He found his wallet on the table in the living room, empty. The little money he had in it the day before was now gone.
When everything was packed they quickly put it all on the truck and drove away. Once they were out of he city they stopped at a small diner to eat something. Jess was starving and ate for three. That made Luke smile for the first time since he got the phone call and Jess looked at him, anger in his eyes. He hated that his face was so bruised. Everyone could see that something bad had happened to him and now people were laughing.
This was why he hated people.
"We're having dinner with a friend of mine and her daughter tonight and if you keep eating like that you're going to fit in perfectly. Lorelai and Rory eat for three every time they sit down to have a meal."
"I'm not going," was the only response Luke got.
"What? Why not?" Luke asked.
Jess didn't answer him. He just looked down at his now empty plate.
Luke could see the shame that flashed on Jess' face before he looked away and cursed himself. Off course Jess wouldn't want people to see him like that. Luke felt like a fool for trying to force that on him so he excused himself by saying that he needed to use the bathroom.
He quickly located a payphone and called the Gilmore's but no one answered so he left a message on their machine.
"Hey Lorelai. I just wanted to let you know that we have to cancel the dinner you had planed for tonight. Jess isn't really up for it and I think it's best for him to just take it easy and rest for a while. Maybe we can do it when he feels better. So, I'll probably see you at the diner tomorrow for breakfast. Bye. Oh, it's Luke by the way."
They stayed mostly silent on the drive back. Jess had his nose in a book and felt no need to partake in pointless conversation.
When they were halfway to Stars Hollow Luke tried to strike up conversation for the fourth time.
"You're going to like Rory. She's your age and she's always reading too."
Jess didn't answer and made no sign that he even heard what Luke had said. Luke sighed, keeping his eyes on the road, thinking that this was going to be a long drive.
"We can have that dinner another night instead. There will be a lot of food and by meeting the Gilmore's, Sookie and Jackson, you can start preparing for the craziness that is Stars Hallow. I swear, not one sane person lives there and they should all be committed to an asylum."
At this Jess looked up from his book and glanced at Luke. "So that includes you too, then, I guess," he said smirking.
"What? No! I'm… It's not..." Luke trailed off. Not knowing how to explain, he stopped talking. A quick smile that went unnoticed by Luke touched Jess's lips before he went back to his book.
When they drove past the sign that read 'Welcome to Stars Hallow' Jess put his book down to study his new home. To say it was small was an exaggeration. You could probably run in a straight line through the town without ever slowing down or getting tired.
It looked like a picture taken out of a movie. All the buildings were nicely painted and there were flowers planted on the sidewalks and not a spot of brown grass as far as the eye could see. Jess sighed and immediately started to think of how he could get enough money to get out of here. No way could he stay here more than a few weeks. He would go mad.
They parked just outside the diner and Luke showed him the apartment. There's not much to it but at least it's a place to crash, Jess thought. It was much better then he was used to and it didn't smell bad.
"I know it's not much. Tomorrow we'll go out and buy you a real bed, I promise," Luke said, pointing at the inflatable mattress.
Jess turned to Luke. "Can we just get my stuff up so I can get some sleep? The guy in the cell next to mine snored the whole time and my body is hurting like hell."
"Oh, right! The doctor from the station left a bottle of painkillers for you," Luke said, putting the bottle down on the kitchen table.
"Great," Jess said, with sarcasm in his voice. After swallowing just one pill, a look of relief washed over his face. But that look disappeared almost as quickly as it had appeared.
He tried his best not to think about Liz and Bob but it was hard. Never before had he been hurting this bad and this time it wasn't the broken bones and cuts that hurt the most.
When the Gilmore's walked into Luke's, the diner was almost bursting. Everyone was talking in hushed tones and kept glancing at the curtain that was separating the diner from the stairs that lead up to the apartment.
Lorelai approached Patty and Babette. "What's going on here? The breakfast crowd has usually died down by now. I don't think I've ever seen this many people in here."
"Morning, Sugar. We're just trying to get a glance at the new kid. Eastside Tilly said she saw him last night when he and Luke unpacked the truck. Said the poor kid looked terrible."
Miss Patty chimed in, "So far the only one coming through that curtain has been Luke."
"Sit down, dolls. We saved you two seats." Babette smiled up at them.
"Thanks. That's sweet." Both girls smiled as they sat down and joined all the other patrons in the diner in their staring contest with the curtain.
A few minutes passed before a very stressed Luke walked out from the storage room and to their table.
"What can I get you?" He said looking at Rory.
"Lots of coffee, pancakes and some bacon on the side." Luke wrote down her order and turned his head to Lorelai.
"I want even more coffee, scrambled eggs and lots of bacon."
Luke turned to Babette and Miss Patty, "You want anything?"
"A glimpse of that nephew of yours would be great," Patty said and winked at him.
Luke clenched his jaw. All morning people had come up to him asking about Jess and when they would get a chance to look at him. Wondering how hurt he was or if Liz really had kicked him out and he was getting fed up.
"People in this town should learn to mind their own damn business," he barked before stalking off to the kitchen to place the order.
Miss Patty turned to look at Babette. "When do you think he'll learn that it's impossible to have your own business in Stars Hallow?"
The front door opened and in barged Liz's new boyfriend, carrying a bag full of liquor.
Jess had been home sick for almost a week with a really high fever.
The man was obviously mad to see him still hanging around the apartment. He didn't seem to care that it was winter in New York and that he had the flu.
He walked over to the table in front of the couch and put the bag down, shooting Jess a death glare. Jess knew what was coming. He had seen that look many times before in this man and in others. Before this day was over he knew he would feel even worse.
The man grabbed a beer bottle and whacked it over Jess's head. It broke and from the pain he could feel and the warm liquid dripping down on his neck, he guessed he had a wound somewhere under his hair. Jess knew what to expect next (they all stuck to the same pattern).
When he was younger he thought life was supposed to be like this. He often used to lie awake in his bed wondering what people found so great about life.
He couldn't understand why there were so many people walking around New York smiling and laughing. They seemed so happy. Why were people pretending?
That was until he realized that most people didn't have to live though this almost every day. He often used to curse himself that it took him nine years to figure that out but now he didn't care. He was twelve years old and he had given up on life and happiness. It was something he would never have.
Jess was still sitting on the couch and with his fever and the blow to the head he felt tired. He leaned his head back and his eyes started to close. He didn't know how long he stayed like that but figured it was only seconds.
A closed fist connected with his jaw. The man was screaming something about him getting blood on the couch and dragged him to the bathroom, throwing him into the filthy tub.
Another fist connected to his head, this time with his temple. After that, everything went dark.
Jess awoke startled. He sat up and rubbed his eyes with his good arm and tried to calm his breathing. The dream had been real. It had happened three years ago.
The man was called Tony and he had been around for almost six months. It had been an awful six months for Jess. Every time Tony had been around he had taken his anger out on Jess. And he had a lot of anger.
When he had stumbled out of the bathroom, trying to reach his bed, Tony had pushed him back inside the bathroom and made him clean up the mess his wound had left behind.
With the fever, it took almost two hours and Tony just sat there the whole time, watching him, with a beer in hand.
Jess felt worthless when he was on his hands and knees, scrubbing the tub clean.
When he finally finished, Tony complained that it had taken longer than it should have. When he stumbled out of bathroom Jess was greeted by Liz, who told him that it was good that he had learned a lesson in cleaning up after himself. She had smiled at him as he made is way into his bedroom.
Sighing, he put his head down on the pillow and tried to get back to sleep, but the pain was too overwhelming.
He sat up on the bed and winced at the pain that was pulsating through his body. Walking to the bathroom, he took the bottle of painkillers from the kitchen table with him. Inside the bathroom he looked at himself in the mirror. His face was purple, green, red and blue but the swelling had gone down quite a bit. He sighed; he didn't look like some kind of monster anymore. Just a fucking rainbow.
He still had the painkillers in his hand and for a few moments, he let himself think about the relief that would come if he swallowed them all. He shook his head and put the bottle down, just taking one pill. A promise had been made and he was not going to break it. Terry was his brother in every way except for in blood. But he had learned that blood wasn't thicker than water. Terry needed him and he needed Terry so he had to stay strong.
His mother had not called once and he wasn't surprised. He was surprised that he didn't miss New York as much as he thought he would. Not that he liked Stars Hallow, the small town scene just wasn't for him. And he had to be there, for Terry. When he thought about Terry he suddenly remembered that he hadn't had a chance to talk to him before he left. He didn't know that he wasn't in New York anymore.
He quickly found the phone in the small apartment and dialed the familiar number, but no one answered.
It was almost ten now. Terry should have been home. He tried not to worry but something in his gut told him that something was wrong. He should haven been home. School was over for the semester and they hadn't gone to England yet. But there was nothing he could do about that now.
Without thinking, he started down the stairs, drawn by the smell of food, and when he passed through the curtain, the whole diner went quiet. Everyone stopped talking and eating and were now staring at him. He felt very exposed, like a trapped animal forced into a corner. A man started snapping pictures of him and he didn't know what to do. He just stood there, frozen.
Luckily Luke came out of the kitchen to see why the sudden noise had stopped and saw that everyone was looking at Jess and that Kirk was taking pictures. He could see that his nephew was very uncomfortable with the situation and decided to take action.
"Hey! Go back to your food or I will charge you extra for the show!" He yelled.
They all took one last look at Jess and went back to their food. The hushed conversations that now could be heard all centered around the mysterious new kid. The one that had to be trouble by the way he looked.
No one knew why he was staying with Luke yet but whatever the reason was it couldn't be good.
Jess turned around and walked behind the curtain before anyone could say anything. Luke quickly fallowed him.
"Jess wait!" Jess stopped in the middle of the stairs and turned to Luke, eyebrow raised.
"Are you alright? How are you feeling?" Luke knew that the whole diner was listening to them.
If he would've been feeling poetic, he might have expressed it something along the lines of: 'my soul is bruised'. The pain he was feeling was not physical, so it would have fit perfectly. He wasn't feeling poetic, though, just deeply pissed off, so instead he looked Luke in the eye and said "fuck off!" Not as refined, but it worked equally well.
Not giving Luke enough time to answer, he climbed the steps two at the time and slammed the apartment door shut.
The dark backstreets of New York were almost empty. Only people you wanted to avoid were out at this time of the day, but when you have no choice you just have to put your fight face on and hope that no one will bother you.
He made slow progress due to his injuries. But he had walked this way so many times that he could probably walk it blind if he had to.
"Just one more block," he kept repeating in his head as he slowly turned round a corner.
He drew a relived breath as he finally reached the apartment building that was hopefully his sanctuary for the night.
Climbing the stairs took him longer than he's hoped and when he finally reached the door he barely had the energy to knock. He just scraped it once, hoping someone inside would hear it. When he heard someone moving inside he drew a reviled breath.
The door flew open and Liz was standing there shooting daggers at him. "What do you want?"
"Is Jess here?"
Liz didn't even bother to look at the boy. "No."
"Oh." His stomach dropped. "Could I come in and wait for him?" He tried his best to plea with her.
"No. Go to your own home. Jess doesn't live here anymore. Kicked him out a few days ago." And then the door slammed in his face.
He sunk to the floor and tried to digest what Liz had told him. Jess had moved? When and where? What was he supposed to do now? He couldn't go home.
Terry didn't know how long he had been sitting there but suddenly he could hear someone walking up the stairs. He looked up and was met by his father's furious gaze.
"You're too predictable, Terry-boy," he said as he grabbed his son by his arm and yanked him up. "I knew you were gonna' come here. Let's go home."