"Ow, careful, don't put that there! Its too big Yaya-chan!"

"Well stop then and let me wiggle it a little bit."

"Ow! You poked me with it Yaya-chan!" As Yaya and Hikari walked through the woods, stepping over some branches on the ground, Yaya was having trouble fitting the flashlight into the pocket of Hikari's jacket. "Sorry Hikari, mine doesn't have any pockets."

"I can't believe I let you drag me into this. We could get in so much trouble Yaya-chan! Would you please tell me why you had to drag me outside with you in the middle of the night?"

"Not yet my dear Hi-ka-ri-chan. Sometimes you've got to take a little risk and have some fun you know."

"Mou. Yaya-chan, sometimes you're just awful. What's so great out here anyway?"

"That." When Hikari looked right in front of her, she saw the serene view of Astraea Lake. It was dark out, but bright enough to see as everything was bathed in the moonlight. The sky had only a few clouds on the horizon and the water was still with a perfect reflection of the moon above. The fireflies were out, the stars were out, and the wind was calm. It was just the peaceful night for Yaya to spend some time with Hikari while the two of them could relax. And in Yaya's mind, act like friends again without driving herself completely nuts.

"Oooh. Its so pretty Yaya-chan. It's been a while since I came to the lake." Hikari ironed her skirt with her hands and sat down on the bench, while Yaya sat right next to her. The next few minutes were had in a calm silence, just the moonlight basking the two in an ethereal glow, and not a noise was heard except for the cicadas.

"Its so nice out tonight Yaya-chan. So calming."

"Yeah."

"I'm glad you brought me out here. I've needed some time to clear my thoughts."

"Yeah."

"Yaya-chan? Are…are you really okay? I've seen you happier lately, but…you're alright with everything, right?"

Yaya's eyes opened up. What did she mean by everything? I'm over thinking again. I'm cool, I can handle this. "Yeah, Hikari. I really am. Thank you." And she smiled with an earnest smile. Hikari smiled back, believing her, and leaned back in a content silence yet again.

And so Yaya sat there with her eyes closed, telling herself over and over that tonight was a good thing, and this was a good idea to be around Hikari to practice being a friend, rather than moping to herself. Then the thought occurred about how much she was in love with Hikari. And once that thought entered her head, she once again couldn't think about anything but that yearning to be closer to Hikari. She tilted her head and opened her eyes just enough to see Hikari. Seeing her sitting there, gazing up at the stars, the moonlight giving her just the right glow, she seemed to almost shine. In Yaya's eyes, Hikari always shone brighter than the stars, brighter than the sun, brighter than anything she could conceive. She furrowed her eyebrows. Dammit. I can't do this. I can't want to be her friend. I love her! Look at her, she's perfect. She looks so beautiful right now. She really is an angel. My perfect angel, except she's not mine. And just like that, the barrier Yaya had built and all of her precognitions of being best friends with Hikari again toppled. Her gaze turned into a frown, and she realized how close Hikari was yet so far away, cliché as it is. Hikari turned to face Yaya and saw that same face. The face Yaya made when she thought no one was looking, that sadness that just wouldn't go away. Caught up in her thoughts, she didn't even notice Hikari's face two feet from hers, looking right at her. "Yaya-chan?"

Jarring her from her thoughts, she panicked. Her face turned red and she tried her best to turn on her fake smile in front of Hikari. "Yeah Hikari?"

Hikari thought back again, and again decided to be firm. "Yaya-chan…Are you really okay? …No. I know you're not. Yaya-chan, you seemed happier lately, but was that just for me?" As Hikari interrogated, Yaya's color slowly drained from her face. Crap I wasn't ready for this. Compose yourself Nanto! "Y-Yeah. I'm okay, really."

"Yaya. You're not okay. You look sick. Now are you feeling ill or are you hiding something from me." The lack of her honorific made Yaya feel like she was 5 years old and got caught lying about stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. "Say something! Don't lock me out of your heart, Yaya-chan!" Hikari's eyes started to water. "Yaya-chan, I know something is wrong, I even asked Amane about it, and she said that you're just making a shell to keep me out, but I'm your best friend! I care about you, I miss you, I don't care about that kiss. I miss how things used to be, now why won't you tell me?" The sound of that girl's name made Yaya turn from panic-stricken to jealous, and then angry. So she did what she did best. She put up yet another front.

"Oh, that's great, your girlfriend can read me so well huh? Well what did she say? Did she say that I'm lying to you? Is she so perfect? So perfect that she can watch over you like I can't? Miss mind reader is so much better than me that you still address her as your senpai and crush on her like a screaming fangirl at a concert?" Yaya stood up and intended to keep trying to change the subject, but all that came out was her unfiltered feelings. "She pays her horses more attention than you! Screw her, she's just an idol and she's got you hypnotized. She should tend to her horses and blow off like the airhead that she is!"

"Yaya-chan! Leave her out of this, that's my girlfriend. You've got no right to insult her!"

"Oh yeah? What are you going to do about it?" For the first time, Hikari actually yelled with a full volume that echoed over the lake.

"YAYA! STOP IT! What is your problem with her! I came here to talk about what's bothering YOU, now why do you have to insult my girlfriend!"

"Because I hate her because I'm jealous that she has you!" Yaya stood there angry and Hikari's eyes just widened. Yaya finally slipped up. Her masquerade was falling, and seeing Hikari like that after actually YELLING at her made her feel awful. She could feel a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach and felt that unfamiliar feeling. Guilt. She made Hikari yell at her, and just wanted to give up. No more. She couldn't take it. Good job Yaya, you screwed up. How are you going to clean this one up. Yaya sighed with a grimace.

"Hikari…I-"

"What does that mean Yaya-chan?" Hikari spoke with a serious face and a flat tone that scared her raven-haired friend.

"I…-"

"WHAT does that MEAN, Yaya-chan?!"

Unfortunately, rather than man-up, anger took over Yaya and she snapped

.

"What do you think it means Hikari!? I'm jealous! I'm pissed off because she isn't good enough for you! She's a punk!"

"You have no right to say that!"

"Oh yes I do, I know she's nowhere near good enough for you!"

"Oh? And you think you'd be good enough for me?"

"Of COURSE I do, because I'm at least in LOVE with you already, Hikari!"

Shock filled the air as Hikari's mouth hung open, her eyes wide as saucers and Yaya stood there a mere foot from her friend, pale as a ghost, her mouth open and her eyes shut, her head hung low. Oh no, what did I just do.

"Ya-ya-chan? W-what did you say?" Yaya did not just say that. That didn't happen. Maybe I pushed too hard.

"Um. Um. Um…" Yaya stood there with her eyes closed looking at the ground, refusing to open them and accept reality right now. "I said…" but nothing followed. Her eyes started to well up, tears began to run down her face as the floodgates opened. She looked up at Hikari, opened her now red eyes and just looked at her.

This isn't true. Yaya doesn't…love me. I mean she loves me in the same way as I love her, like friends…right?

"Yaya-chan?" Yaya couldn't control herself anymore, and at last she finally started to speak words that were true.

"I..I'm sorry Hikari. I love you. I love you with all of my heart. I can't sleep well, I can't speak right, I can't even tell the truth. I lied to you Hikari. I've felt like crap ever since I saw you falling for someone else. I never acted like it bothered me at first so I didn't say anything. I was hiding. I tried to convey my feelings without warning with one single kiss and then just acted stupid. I know you said you forgive me but I know you don't." Yaya was sobbing uncontrollably at this point, right in front of Hikari. Wow, is that why Yaya kissed me? She…loves me? And… for this long?! "I can't take it anymore Hikari. I can't act like this. I can't be friends like this, it just hurts too much! I only wanted you to be happy, I want you to be with her. She's a nice girl, she really is, and she's lucky to have you, but I didn't think it would hurt this much! Hikariiii!" Yaya openly cried right in front of her roommate, and the thought made Hikari's chest ache in a way she never had. Hikari immediately reached forward and embraced Yaya, pulling her tight against herself, as Yaya's arms were limp. She wasn't even strong enough to hug back right then. So Hikari let Yaya just cry on her shoulder and rubber her back. I can't believe it. Yaya has been depressed this whole time…and it's because…because...Yaya cried standing there, and after a minute, her body automatically hugged Hikari, mostly because she was out of energy, and partly as some tiny way to apologize to her. I'm so sorry Hikari. I'm so sorry.

Hikari stood there, replaying everything over the last several months. Her mind stopped when she replayed the time that Yaya kissed her. It was her first kiss. She had brought that little shell back for Yaya. The girl looked at her and before she knew it, Yaya had her lips caught against her own. She was too shocked at the time to think anything of it. Then Yaya grabbed at her and when it was over, she was mortified at what had happened. Her best friend has forced herself on her. Thinking about it through the following days, she assumed that it was either some sick joke, some weird punishment for something, that Yaya was especially frisky that day and crossed the line, or that maybe Yaya had a crush on someone and took out her excitement on Hikari instead. She had always assumed Yaya was being insulting to take advantage of her like that. But if Yaya had felt this distraught for this long, was it something else? The only conclusion she did not draw was that Yaya kissed her because she liked her. That would be ludicrous, why…The thoughts hit her at terminal velocity.

- Looking at Yaya when no one was looking - seeing that longing in her eyes.

- The smile that Yaya had when had every time she looked at the blonde.

- The way Yaya always seemed to sing better when Hikari was singing at the same time.

- The way she perked up if anyone else mentioned her name.

- The jealousy that she had for Amane.

- That time she saw Yaya nearly crying and holding her yellow dress from that date….

Oh my God. Yaya loves me. She actually, really loves me.