After everyone was finished eating, Adrian told Sharona and Benjy that they could get cleaned up and unpacked in the guest room, while he cleaned up the kitchen.
The time seemed to fly by as Adrian made sure that everything was exactly where it was suppose to be, and kept thinking about the 'almost kiss.'
When Sharona walked in the living room, he was just getting done vacuuming. She was wearing a light blue satin night gown.
Adrian unplugged the vacuum, and looked at her. She looked perfect with her hair still damp and no make-up on. "Did you find everything okay?" he asked with a smile.
"Adrian...I practically lived in this house for 6 and ½ years, I think I can find everything." she says with a smirk on her face. "I'm just so glad to be back, I thought we could play catch up." Sharona sat on the couch
"Catch up?" Adrian said confused.
"Yes, catch up." She couldn't believe how naive he could be at times. For someone so brilliant, he was so clueless about things like normal phrases. Sharona rolled her eyes, "It's when you talk about the things that have happened since you last saw each other. You catch up to what the other person has been doing."
"Oh," Adrian had been afraid to talk to Sharona about everything that had happened since she left. He was now sitting on the couch beside Sharona. "Well, I got a new assistant." he said looking down.
"Well I figured that. What's her name?" Sharona says smiling at him.
Adrian looks up at her confused, "You're not mad?" he asks surprised.
"Of course not Adrian, it's been about 3 years." Sharona can't believe that Adrian actually thought that she expected him not hire someone else.
"Her name is Natalie Teeger and she has a 14 year old daughter named Julie." Adrian said this very fast and then added, "Sharona, please don't be mad at me, but I don't want to fire her. She depends on this job, and I consider her a friend." Adrian felt so nervous he didn't know what to do, so he just started picking at his finger nails.
"Adrian, what is wrong with you? I don't expect you to fire her." Sharona looked at Adrian, 'He is actually torn up about this. How can he feel bad about me leaving him, and him finding someone to replace me.' Sharona took his head in her hands and pulled his face up until his eyes met hers. "Adrian, I'm just glad that you are still speaking to me. I don't expect anything from you."
He finally could let go of the guilt that he had been caring, he knew that she meant what she said. "So I guess you got a new job?" he said trying to relieve the tension of her soft hands still holding his face.
Sharona let go of Adrian's face and said, "Well not at first, Trevor had a really good job, and he wanted me to stay at home. But of course he lost that job when he started drinking. Then I found a job as a secretary and Trevor began drinking harder. He started being very controlling over Benjy, and then last night, we got into a fight about Benjy spending the night over at Brent's house. He hit me, then I told him to leave or I would call the cops, he kept apologizing, but I picked up the phone, and he left. I quit my job this morning, and well, now I'm here." Sharona let out a long sigh. "So, how about you?"
"Well, I've been buried alive, someone impersonated Trudy and I thought she might still be alive for about 1 ½ hours, I adopted a kid for 2 weeks, I was blinded for 2 days by maize, I went to the hospital, I met my dad, I got hugged by a naked man, and I saw Trudy's eyes again." He said it all like it was a normal thing.
"You had a kid for 2 whole weeks? How did that go?" She couldn't imagine Adrian taking care of a kid all by himself.
Adrian smiled and his eyes became filled with tears, "It was great, some of the best days of my life. Natalie and Dr. Kroger confidenced me to give Tommy up, he was two." Adrian sniffled, "They were probably right thought, I made it 2 weeks but no kid deserves a father like me." Adrian looks down.
Sharona guides his face to hers, with her hand on his jaw. "Adrian anyone would love to have a father like you, look at Benjy, he adores you. Adrian, I'm so proud of you." Sharona's eyes are now glossed over with tears again. 'He took care of a two year old on his own. He has changed a lot, the old Adrian wouldn't have done that.'
Adrian was smiling so big 'She's proud of me.' 'I can't stand looking at her and not kissing her.' He could feel his heart racing as he looked longingly into her eyes.
Sharona's hand now was resting on his neck, 'How does he do that? How does he tell me exactly what he is feeling just by looking at me?' She leans in toward him.
'She wants to kiss me?' Adrian leans in closer and tilts his head 'I love you so much Sharona' he thinks to himself as he looks from her eyes to her lips, back to her eye's again. Slowly his eyes close, and he leans closer.
'He's going to do it. He's finally going to kiss me.' She closes her eyes and moves toward his lips. 'Oh my, Adrian, you're good.' She can't help but be a little surprised, considering she hasn't ever seen him kiss anyone before.
'This is good, I want to stay like this,' his heart beating wildly and lips feeling electric with the touch of her lips. His hands slide behind her neck genitally pulling her closer, as he parts his lips he and softly kissed her bottom lip. She parted her lips and he massaged her tongue with his.
"Oh Adrian," Sharona gasps, as she starts sucking his bottom lip, and rubbing her hand through his hair.
Suddenly the image of Trudy appears in his mind. In an instant everything was wrong. He jumped up from the couch and out of Sharona's arms. 'What am I doing? She not Trudy! I feel so dirty. Trudy please forgive me.' Adrian thinks as his breathing becomes shallow and rapid.
Sharona was just leaning in when she felt him jump up. She opened her eyes to see Adrian in a state of panic. 'What did we just do?' Sharona thinks. She looks at him surprised, still not believing it herself.
"Look at the time, it's already 1:45." Adrian says nervously as he starts to back up from her. "I'm tired, aren't you tired? (Adrian fakes a yawn) We better get to bed." Now Adrian is out of the room.
"Wait...aren't we going to talk (she hears the slam of his door) about this?" asks Sharona who is now standing in the room alone.
Sharona opens her eye and looks at the clock which reads 10:00 A.M. She had slept in the living room on the pull out bed in the couch. "Adrian," she calls out and doesn't hear anything. 'That's weird, he's usually up 6:00.' she thinks. Sharona gets up and looks around, she can smell coffee. Sharona walks into the kitchen to find a pot of coffee, six pieces of perfect toast and a note that says 'Sharona, there are eggs in the microwave. I went to my 10:00 appointment with Dr. Kroger.' it was signed Adrian Monk. 'Wonder what the topic of the session will be today?' she thinks with a smirk.
"So Adrian, how are you feeling today?" says Dr. Kroger with a smile
Adrian shrugs as he stares at the pillow, as if he is searching for something to straighten.
"Adrian, is something wrong?"
Adrian looks around the room more, and finally gives up on finding something out of order. "Sharona came in."he says with no emotion, "She's staying with me."
"Oh, that must be nice...Adrian, aren't you glad to see Sharona?" Dr. Kroger is confused by Adrian's behavior, he would have thought Adrian would be happy to see Sharona.
Adrian shrugs again and then lets out a deep sigh as he shakes his head from side to side.
"Adrian, did something happen? Last time we talked about Sharona you said that you understood why she left. You said that you weren't mad at her anymore, and that you would give anything to see her again." Dr. Kroger said even more confused.
"Last night we where talking on the couch," Adrian looks up at Dr. Kroger, "and...and, (he struggles to say the last part) we kissed." Adrian looks down at his wedding ring and stares.
"How did that make you feel Adrian?" Dr. Kroger is surprised that Adrian actually kissed someone.
"I don't know." Adrian says still staring at his ring. "I feel ...I feel like I betrayed Trudy." he says as he looks up at Dr. Kroger with a 'what should I do' look.
"Adrian, I didn't ask how you feel now, I asked how did the kiss feel. Listen, I want you to try this exercise. I want you to close your eyes (Adrian closes his eyes) and think back to how everything was a minute before the kiss. Can you do that? Now tell me everything that happens, and this is important Adrian, don't leave anything out." Dr. Kroger is now watching Adrian closely.
Adrian tries to think back. "I was sitting next to Sharona facing her, (Adrian smiles). She was wearing a light blue satin night gown and she smelled like vanilla and lavender. I had just told her about (Adrian's smile fades) Tommy. She is touching my face, making me look at her, her hands are so soft and warm (Adrian starts smiling again). She's telling me that anyone would love to have a father like me, and that Benjy adores me. She said that she was proud of me."
"Keep going Adrian, but remember to tell me what you are thinking." Dr. Kroger says softly
Adrian nods and continues, "I'm looking into her eyes, I'm thinking about how hard it is to look at her and to not kiss her. She is leaning toward me, I'm thinking that she wants me to kiss her. I looked at her lips and then back into her eyes, I'm thinking about how much I love her. I'm closing my eyes, (Adrian smiles and inhales quickly) It's nice, her lips make (Adrian giggles) mine tingle, I'm thinking about how good it would be if I could stay this way. I move my hand behind her head and genitally pull her closer, I'm kissing her bottom lip. She pulls me closer and starts French kissing me, she's good, really good. She calls out my name, and starts sucking my bottom lip." Adrian suddenly opens he eyes and his face is sad, "Then...I saw Trudy."
"So did you and Sharona talk about the kiss?" asked Dr. Kroger professionally, but inside he was excited to know that it was Adrian who had kissed Sharona, and Adrian had actually said the word love about a woman other than Trudy.
"No, she wanted to, but I ran out of the room. What should I do Dr. Kroger?" Adrian once again is looking around the room for something to straighten up.
"Adrian, I think you should give it a chance. You're the one that brought Trudy into a moment between you and Sharona, you are the only one that can take Trudy out from between you two. My guess is that you felt guilty for being happy with out Trudy, so therefore you thought of her." Dr. Kroger give Adrian that 'you know I'm right look'.
"I don't know, I'm afraid." Adrian looks as though he is struggling with the decision.
"Adrian, you said that you love Sharona, I think it's worth working through the fear." says Dr. Kroger
Adrian is alarmed, "I don't think so. I never said that I love Sharona. I think I would remember." says Adrian taken aback.
"Adrian, you just said that when you were looking at her, you were thinking about how much you love her." says Dr. Kroger with a worried look on his face. 'How could Adrian not remember saying that, he remembers everything.'
Adrian suddenly remembers that he did say that he loved her. 'Do I love her?' he asks himself in thought. 'I've loved her for so long.' his heart answers back. Adrian is more confused and worried now than he was when he got here.
Adrian walked in the door, to find Sharona sitting on the couch watching TV. "So how's Benjy feeling this morning?" asked Adrian. He had finally made up his mind on the walk back home, and was hoping that Benjy would be home (that way he could prolong the talk) and at the same time hoping that Benjy wasn't home (so he could just get it over with).
"Oh he slept like a baby, he's fine. He went to an old friends house." Sharona said not even looking at him.
"About, that talk? I was wondering, if now would be okay?" Adrian asked, then took into account the odd look on Sharona's face and added, "but if you would rather talk later we can talk later." He smiled his most confident smile.
'Go Adrian! The Adrian I remember would have avoided this as long as he could.' Sharona thought. "No, now is fine." She said as she scooted to one side of the couch to make room for him. She couldn't help but think about what happened last time he sat beside her.
Adrian sits in the same place as last night on the couch. He looks into her eyes and finds himself mezmerized by her again. Suddenly he takes a quick breath, and smiles, he never knew anyone that could take his breath away, except Trudy. "Sharona, (Adrian's eyes look down)I want to know what you thought about (Adrian's eyes rise to meet hers) our kiss."
Sharona is a little shocked, she thought that he would just blow it off as a mistake. Now he was asking her about it. She thought about giving him a vauge answer, like it was nice or okay, and seeing what he would do, but she couldn't be that cruel to him. Instead she gave him a smoldering look and said "I wouldn't say no to seconds."
Adrian smiles slightly, and turns 10 shades of red. 'Why am I breathing so heavily?' he thinks, as his heart seems to be beating hard and slow against his chest. Adrian leans in toward Sharon. "I want to give this a chance." he says only an inch away from her lips.
Sharona can't see his mouth anymore. 'He's so close, he smells so good.' Sharona heard him say that he would like to give this a chance with her ears, but saw him say it with his eyes. She couldn't find her voice but all she could think was that she wanted to give it a chance too.
'Her eyes say yes.' he thought. Not able to take the tension anymore he devirured the space between them and started kissing her. 'Oh god,' he whimpered inside as her lips against his make him feel more than he has in such a long time. He could feel his heart beating so fast now that he was afraid, but he wasn't going to let fear stop him, as he started kissing her more passionatly.
'I can't believe that this is happening. I've dreamed about it, but I never thought that it could happen, I didn't think he capable of loving anyone besides Trudy.' thought Sharona. 'He's so good, I wonder how long it took for him to learn how to kiss so perfectly.' She felt him kissing on her neck now, and leaned her head to the side to give him better axcess.
Adrian didn't know what to do with himself, it had been so long. His hands where softly rubbing her back as they nerviously shook. His lips were making their way farther down her neck, he was at her collor bone, when he saw Trudy again. 'Not now Trudy.' thought Adrian. As fast as Trudy had appeared she had vanished. 'I just told Trudy to leave. I just told my wife to leave.' he thought now full of guilt and shame. His hands grabbed Sharona's hands and slowly pushed them back. "Wait...wait" he said out of breath, and trying to gain his composer from the thought of pushing Trudy away.
"I thought, that you wanted this?" Sharona is confused and feels hurt that he pushed her away.
"I do, I do (he makes sure to look her in the eyes) but I'm afraid (he looks up at Trudy's picture on the wall), it's been so long." He looked at her intently, "And most of all, Sharona, I don't want you to do this because it's what I want. I don't want you to do anything that you don't want to do." Adrian is now looking down at his hands again.
"Adrian I want this. " Sharona says passionately.
Adrian looks back at Trudy's picture, "Sharona, I'm...I'm so afraid. I feel like I'm betraying Trudy." His eyes are now full of sorrow looking into Sharona's eyes, as if searching for an answer.
"Adrian...don't do this! She would want you to be happy, (Sharona grabs his shoulder) you know she would."
Adrian looks up at her, "I know she would, I just don't know how to let go. You deserve better than me. I'm ..you know..." Adrian twirls his finger around his ear.
"Adrian, don't say that, you're not crazy. Just weird, but in a good way." Sharona smiles at him, "Listen, you are the most honest...caring...sincere person I know. If anyone doesn't deserve someone, it's that I don't deserve you. Adrian, I'm not perfect, I make mistakes, but I want to give this a try."
"It's not like I'm perfect." Adrian says almost laughing. "For god's sake, I'm afraid of milk! I can't even walk down a street without touching poles. Sharona...I'm not even sure that I count as a man. What kind of man is afraid of the dark? What kind of man still can't take off his wedding ring, when his wife has been dead over 10 years, that's a decade!?!" Adrian looks at Sharona for answers.
Sharona looks into his eyes,"The kind of man that I love, that's what kind of man!" 'I can't believe I just said that. Wow...it felt good.' Sharona is surprised that she finally said what she had been hiding for so long.
'Did I hear her right? Did she just say that she loves...me?' Adrian was stumped, he never expected her to say this, "Sharona...I didn't...I never thought...that you could love me. I want to give this a chance too, but it's going to take some time. And it might take a long time, for some things. Are you okay with that?" Adrian looks deep into her eyes, he has to be sure that she understands how important this is to him.
"Yes, of course I am. Adrian, I understand, I know what happened to you. I know it's going to take some time. All I want is for us to give it a real chance." says Sharona looking at Adrian with love and compassion.