"You know me, Merlin, I never listen to you."
Merlin gasped at the sight of the monster. Gaius had told him it was horrid, but never, in his most terrible dreams, had he expected it to be this. Wings half its size, it had small limbs and a large head, its horns pointy and strong, the beast glared at them, growling in warning. It bared its teeth at him, terrible, razor sharp teeth and narrow eyes.
"You must be joking," Lancelot said.
Merlin could not help but agree.
"How do we stop it?" Arthur said, trying to put on his 'I am a seasoned warrior and none shall best me' expression with difficulty.
"Gaius said-" Merlin said, his voice high. He cleared his throat before trying again, "Gaius said that we just have to trap it in here." He pulled a small, run-engraved box. "Then it'll be forced into another realm."
The creature growled at them, and Merlin had to look away, biting his tongue.
"What do you suggest, sire?"
"I say," Here Arthur took a deep breath. "We charge it head-on. Overwhelm it as best we can."
Merlin looked grim, and Lancelot nodded assent. Arthur ordered, "On my count." The three men surrounded the beast slowly, trying not to startle it.
"One," Merlin shared a glance with Lancelot, who half-smiled encouragingly at him. Merlin knew the only true way to force the creature into the box was with magic, making this mission all the more dangerous for him.
"Two..." Arthur slowly drew his sword, Merlin and Lancelot following suit. After seeing that all of them were in position, he cracked his neck and steeled himself with a nod. "Three!"
They charged.
With a squawk, the three inch tall faerie darted out of the mens' paths. Its eyes blinked dangerously on its tiny face, fragile winds flittering ominously. As Lancelot charged, it yelped in warning not to advance. This was not heeded.
"Lancelot!" Merlin cried as the blue creature, with a flick of bitty, twiggy fingers, hissed a short spell at the oncoming knight. Suddenly, Lancelot disappeared.
"What did you do with him?" Arthur demanded. The faerie twitched, making a sound that suspiciously resembled a laugh.
Merlin prowled where Lancelot had been standing only a few seconds before. There was no sign of him, just the open clearing. A bug flittered closeby Merlin, who absentmindedly waved it off.
With wide eyes, Arthur drew back. "Halt, fiend!" The prince commanded, using his Royal Pratness voice again. Merlin sighed at him, then waved the irritably bug off again.
The faerie hissed at them in an earbreaking frequency. The ladybug landed on Merlin's nose, wings twitching worriedly.
"Uh, Arthur?"
"Not now, Merlin," Arthur growled, leveling his sword at the beast.
"I think I've found Lancelot," Merlin said, reaching up a finger and tapping the ladybug. Lancelot glared, irate.
Arthur gaped. "You're kidding."
"I wish."
Arthur turned his attention back to the faerie, announcing boldly, "I order you to fix Lancelot right this instant."
The faerie looked on, unimpressed. Merlin shared his sentiments.
"Now," Arthur tried again. Merlin rolled his eyes with the ladybug, who fluttered onto his shoulder. Lancelot looked almost as irritated as the faerie, flittering his little wings. Hopefully, Arthur said, "Please?"
This was the last straw for the faerie. Suddenly the ladybug was joined by a beautiful, hot pink butterfly who somehow managed to look indignant even when it couldn't speak. The faerie turned to the last man, Merlin, who stepped back in fear.
(Purely by instinct, he swears. There was no way that Merlin Emrys, the most powerful warlock to ever walk the earth, was scared of a faerie. Not even this angry, flittering three inch terror with a horrible high pitched growl and really sharp-looking horns.)
Fine, so he was a little bit scared.
But not much! He definitely didn't let out a girlish scream. Neither did he trip over grass in his haste to get away from the faerie. And that was definitely not a tear that just fell. There was just something in Merlin's eye.
Honest.
"Arguwenti healpr meim!" Merlin shrieked, scuttling back frantically from his place on the ground. The faerie, with a fearsome roar, was sucked into the box, which slammed shut with a pleasant snap. Merlin then turned his attention to the agape ladybug and the horridly bright pink butterfly. "Theim faerie esgi me, makkig lagem!"
Merlin was quickly joined by an uncomfortable knight and a baffled prince. Arthur stuttered incoherently, staring at his manservant, who tried not to run away screaming. I just used magic. I just used magic in front of Arthur. I'm dead. I'm dead. I'm so dead.
"Are you alright?" Merlin asked easily, as though he did not just reveal his deepest, darkest, most magical secret, punishable by death, in front of the king of Camelot.
"We're fine, Merlin, thanks," Lancelot answered, tagging along with Merlin. They both looked at Arthur.
He ogled at the pair of them, face beet red. "I - buh- magic - you - sorcerer - I -"
"What?" Merlin schooled his expression into a look of bewilderment. "What are you on about now? Lance, do you know what he's talking about?" He asked Lancelot, who shot him a look that clearly said don't-get-me-involved-in-this-Merlin-this-is-all-your-fault-why-did-you-have-to-use-magic-like-that-Merlin-you-reckless-fool-stop-looking-to-me-for-answers-you-never-used-to-be-so-reckless-you-really-must-learn-to-be-subtle-Merlin. Despite this inner tirade, Merlin's secret-sharing friend acquiesced tightly, "I have no idea."
"You're- you're a sorcerer! You use magic!" Arthur stuttered, stunned.
Merlin stared, offended. "Arthur, you think I'm a sorcerer?"
Arthur was enraged, "Yes you are! Those were definitely magic spells! You were using magic!"
Merlin shook his head, eyes wide and innocent. "No they weren't, sire. I was speaking normal English, just like this."
"No you weren't!" Arthur shouted wildly, throwing his arms up, "Those were spells! You're a sorcerer!"
Before Merlin could say anything else, Lancelot spoke up. "Arthur, think about this logically."
"Logically?!" Arthur said furiously.
"Listen, sire, is it at all possible that you misunderstood?" Arthur just stared at him, uncomprehending. "I mean, you were turned into a butterfly. How do you know what he said was magic? Could you not just have been disoriented by the transformation. It is likely you didn't even know what was being said," He offered timidly, trying to ignore the glare set upon him.
"Do butterflies even have ears as such?" Merlin mused. "I don't even know if they can hear. They have eyes, I know that, and wings of course, as well as a basic body, but do they have ears?" A realization: "What if that's what the antenaes do!"
Lance was intrigued. "Antenaes?"
Merlin grinned excitedly. "Yeah, the little antenae things sticking off of their foreheads! You know, those. Butterflies are so cute! Especially those daintly little - I mean," he corrected, feeling the deadly glare burning through him. "Butterflies aren't cute at all. They're very masculine, very masculine indeed."
"Do you mind?" Arthur said incredulously. "We were having a rather important discussion, in case you didn't realize. Or did you happen to see that you're a bloody sorcerer!"
"Arthur, I think you must have misunderstood," Lancelot soothed the livid man. "Ladybugs have excellent hearing, and I heard him loud and clear. That was most certainly not magic, sire."
Merlin quickly agreed, "Yeah, Arthur, you must have misheard." Merlin forced a laugh. "I mean, could I really be a sorcerer?"
Arthur stared at him dumbly, his eye twitching. Finally, to Merlin's great surprise, Arthur snickered. "That is a ridiculous thought, I must admit." He seemed to have wholeheartedly swallowed Lancelot's idea, hook, line, and sinker, without too much deep thought. Arthur clapped Merlin on the shoulder strongly, dutifully ignoring the half-relieved, half-broken expression on his manservant's face.
"I'm sorry I doubted you, Merlin," Arthur told him sincerely. Then he walked away, chuckling under his breath.
"Merlin, a sorcerer - ha!"