Hi, peoples! It's me again, and I am on a roll! Now that the stupid chapter is out of the way, I can update way faster! Also, due to popular demand, I will be including omakes in this story. If you want to read them, look down at the author's notes at the end of every chapter to see if I have one that time. Enjoy!

Oh, I just realized that I've been forgetting the disclaimer!

I own Naruto only in my dreams, otherwise Naruto and Sakura would've started making out already!

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Sunlight. That was the very first thing Naruto noticed as he squinted his eyes against the glare. He honestly hoped that Shinigami had done his end of the bargain, if they were to have any influence over the events in this timeline. With his eyes finally adjusted to the change from the dark sewer to here, Naruto was able to get a good look around.

He was in a rolling field, surrounded on all sides by a sea of trees, with a glistening pond on the side. A small booth, no bigger than a mid-sized adult, was positioned in the epicenter of the field. Six large doors that you might see at a palace were placed at the corners of the field. Looking back, Naruto could see the door that he had just come through. He smiled. 'So far so good. Now to see if the mechanism works,' Naruto mused. Walking up to the booth, Naruto stepped inside and looked over the assortment of buttons and levers. He finally spotted what he was looking for: a mouthpiece of an old-fashioned telephone. Naruto picked it up, took a deep breath, and let it all loose. "HEY! GET YOUR ASSES IN HERE! I SUMMON YOU!" he screamed. The palace doors flew open, and in flew Rock Lee, Kiba, Chouji, Gaara, Shikamaru and Kakashi bum-first, as if pulled by a magnet. They all landed in a great heap of flailing limbs near Naruto.

"What is this most unyouthful mess!?" Rock Lee screamed.

"Alright, who's the wise guy!? Lemme at him, I'll tear him apart!" Kiba growled as he managed to disengage from the pile. Naruto buckled in half, roaring with laughter as the group managed to untangle themselves.

"Oh, man! That was priceless! Where's Sai when need him to paint a picture? I want that memory immortalized!" Naruto howled, wiping an imaginary tear from the corner of his eye. The group glared at him, then seemed to realize that not only are they all together in an unknown location, they are all in their pre-time warp bodies.

Naruto smirked. "Took ya long enough. Now, seeing as you guys probably have no idea what the hell's going on," the grouped nodded at this comment. "I'm going to give you the condensed version of what's going on. Basically, the gods owed me a few favors, and when Shinigami showed up to seal ol' fuzz-for-brains, he gave me three wishes. This happens to be the outcome of one of said wishes." A group enlightenment took place, as everybody adding their own comment to the mix, with Kiba even asking to trade him a wish.

"Now, seeing as I designed this place, I know it from back to front. Each of those doors leads back to your respective consciousnesses. And no, Kiba, you can't take over somebody else's consciousness."

"Damn it!"

"One of the little perks about this is that since all our consciousnesses are linked to this, we can talk to each other telepathically, and sense intense emotions and the physical condition of said person. However, if somebody doesn't want to let his emotions and/or thoughts be heard by others, or others don't want to hear somebody's thoughts," here Naruto glared at Kakashi, who instinctively put his hand over the pocket holding Icha Icha paradise, affectionately dubbed "the smut pouch" by Naruto. "Need only imagine a steel wall, and it should block anything, unless you are either up against someone skilled in the mind arts, like someone akin to Inoichi Yamanaka's skill, or you have some sort of seal that connects your consciousnesses, like the Kyuubi talking to me, or the cursed seal allowing Orochi-teme to project thoughts into Sasuke-teme."

Naruto waved a hand at the booth. "Now, for the booth, it-"suddenly, a deluge of sand shot out from Gaara towards Naruto, just barely missing him. All people present were visibly shocked. "GAARA! WHAT THE HELL!?" Naruto screamed as tiny sand bullets shot at the time travelers.

"It's not me! It's the Shukaku!" Gaara's eyes were wide with fear, the veins in his head and neck visibly straining as he tried in vain to suppress the malevolence of the Shukaku.

Naruto cursed. "Dammit! I forgot about that! I don't think anybody here has that kind of sealing skills to suppress it! Unless…" Naruto paused for a second to think, but was slammed into one of the consciousness doors by a mighty swipe of sand. Naruto spat out blood as he tried to stand up. Biting the tip of his thumb, he quickly went through the seals for the Kuchiyose no jutsu. "Fuck! I was hoping I could save this for later, but you've forced my hand! Come forward, KYUUBI NO KITSUNE!" Naruto screamed as he slammed his palm into the ground. An eighth door appeared, floating above the toll booth, with dark flames licking out from under the bottom. The doors slowly opened with an agonizing creak, releasing a dark cloud of miasma. Kakashi's eyes widened as the rest of the group paused, including Gaara and his sand. A sandaled foot stepped out onto the air as the group gasped.

The effect of seeing the Kyuubi no Youko in his human form for the first time was something akin to when Kakashi's mask had been slashed off of his face in a Sound invasion. The battle had been won, as everybody, including the straight guys AND the Konoha-nin, had been knocked unconscious from orgasms right there. Yes, Kakashi's face is THAT gorgeous, and so is the Kyuubi's. (A/N I wouldn't know, as I still can't find the episode where Kakashi loses his mask, and I AM straight, but I've seen this in so many different fics, and I couldn't resist:P also, I suck at describing OCs in detail and doing fight scenes, so don't kill me, please!)

The Kyuubi could only be described as magnificent. His long crimson hair tying off into a loose ponytail, his angular face, with whisker marks not unlike Naruto's, set with a square jaw, his blood-red robes accentuating his light tan, his nine orange tails swaying behind him. His scarlet eyes widened in confusion as he looked around. "Freedom…?" he whispered to nobody in particular as he walked down a set of invisible stairs. "Am I free?" his musings came to an abrupt halt as he caught sight of the group. "You! Who are you!?"

Gaara dropped to his knees, clutching his head, as his sand formed a tanuki mask floating in the air. "Lord Kyuubi! Help me… the bloodlust, it burns, it burns me!" it rasped out, quivering in the air.

Kyuubi was visibly shocked. "Baron Shukaku! You, too, have been sealed?" he then realized what it was implying and rushed over to Gaara. "Damn! They must have used a berserker seal on you! Not good!" he pulled up Gaara's shirt and forced some chakra through the seal to make it visible. "Damnit! They did, and a poor-quality one at that! Somebody hold him down for me while I do this!" Kiba and Shikamaru snapped out of their stupor and grabbed hold of Gaara's arms. The Kyuubi then turned to Naruto. "I don't know how or why this is possible, but I'm not about to leave one of my most powerful subordinates in this much pain! I'm going to need you all to protect me from any backlash from the sand while I'm manipulating the seal! Nothing must disrupt me!"

Kyuubi then thrust his palm onto the seal and started flashing one-handed seals. Red chakra started flowing from Kyuubi's hand into the berserker seal. Gaara screamed and started thrashing about as the bondage between man and demon began disintegrating. The tanuki mask burst apart as every grain of sand there shot towards the Kyuubi. Naruto let out a war cry as he charged into battle. "KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU (Shadow clone technique)!" Ten Narutos poofed into existence as they began combating the sand.

"First gate, KAI!" Lee dropped into the Iron Fist stance as he charged at a newly formed sand clone, only to have it melt away a few feet from it. "Hokage-sama! The sand! It is as if it is using Drunken Fist!" Lee yelled, referring to his own fighting style if he has consumed any alcohol. Indeed, the attacks were as unpredictable and sporadic as said style. Plumes of sand charging at an offender, only to swerve away. Bunshins forming by the scores, only to melt away seconds later.

"Damn it! How can we fight something that doesn't know what it itself is going to do!?" Chouji growled as he multi-sized to block an onslaught against the Kyuubi.

Kakashi threw an exploding tag at some sand forming a bunshin. "We don't fight it! We stop it from doing anything!" he then started flashing seals. "SUITON: SUIRYUUDAN NO JUTSU! (water release: water dragon technique)" a plume of water shot of the pond towards a forming cloud of sand, turning it into mud.

Naruto caught on to what he was attempting, and started his own seals. "SUITON: SUIJINHEKI NO JUTSU! (water release: water barrier wall technique)" the entire pond was blown out of the ground, turning into a wall completely encircling Kyuubi and Gaara. Any attempts to attack were rendered useless.

Suddenly, Gaara screeched, his pain coming off of him in waves, before both he and his sand fell still. The Kyuubi shakily stood up, panting. "It is done. The seal has been altered." He fell to the ground once more. "That took a lot out of me. Not only destroying a seal and making a new one, but keeping Shukaku safely inside and not killing the host, all without a life taken."

Naruto let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "Thank you, Kyuubi. You shall be rewarded for this. Go back to your seal and I shall-"

"No!" Kyuubi stopped him with a wave of his hand. "I'm not going back there until I know what the hell is going on! How am I free from the seal with you apparently alive? Why do you look like a 25-year old when I know for a fact you were just born? How do you know the Shukaku's host? I will have answers!"

"You will not speak to the Rokudaime Hokage with such disrespect!" Lee bellowed, forgetting for a second who he was talking to. The Kyuubi snorted.

"Yet another question for you! Why does he call you Rokudaime when I just killed the Yondaime, the most recent Hokage?" Naruto sighed.

"Fine. I shall give you what you seek. Go to the other door that was sealed, like this one, and open it. It should answer most of you questions."

The Kyuubi nodded. "I shall return." He disappeared in a column of flame, slamming his consciousness doors behind him. Naruto turned to the others.

"okay, he's going to be back in a couple of seconds, so ask any questions you had before Gaara attacked while he's gone." Kiba's hand shot up.

"How the hell is the Kyuubi here!? Shouldn't he be, like, inside you or something?" the others muttered the same thing.

"Well, that's also part of the wish. While we're in this realm, he can come and go when I summon him. He and I developed a bit of a sensei/apprentice relationship after a while, and I figure that he can teach us a lot of stuff while we're here. The control booth right there," Naruto motioned to the booth at this point. "Can allow us to transport us to a training ground that can change the terrain and enemies to whatever we want, so I thought that while we're still babies and can't train for real, we can train here and create moves and stuff, along with the Kyuubi, if he goes along with it." Naruto was stopped from answering any more questions by Kyuubi's door opening once again, and Kyuubi stumbling out over to Naruto.

"Okay, wow. My brain hurts. THAT is a bit much to swallow. So, you guys are from the future, where Orochi-teme," Naruto arched an eyebrow at Kyuubi using his nickname for the snake Sannin. "Took over the body of one of the last Uchiha-temes," another arched eyebrow at the new nickname. "Your teammate, who went to him to gain enough power to kill his older brother Uchiha Itachi, who massacred the Uchiha clan to test out his newly gained Mantekyou Sharingan, and destroyed Konoha. I can now say that I've seen it all. Damn."

"I know."

"And all of the bijuu were being captured by an organization called Akatsuki, whose plans were to take over the world. DAMN."

"I know."

"And you want me to tutor all of you?" everybody tensed. Kyuubi chuckled at the motion. "Well, I don't care how it happens, as long as I don't get shoved into some stupid statue." Naruto relaxed as he heard these words.

"Thank you for your understanding. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go and start planning what to do now." Naruto turned and walked off to his friends. "Yes! That went a lot better than I thought it would. How's Gaara, guys?"

"He's looking okay. Unconscious, but okay. He should be coming to pretty soon."

The words were barely out of Shikamaru's mouth before Gaara groaned and sat up. Naruto ran to his fellow Jinchuuriki's side.

"Gaara! How you feeling, man?"

He groaned once more and rubbed his head. "Like Chiyo baa-san (just brought me back to life. What happened?"

"Shukaku happened. I had Kyuubi come and mess around with your seal so that the sporadic killing-for-existence and insomniac stuff shouldn't happen again. He said something about a berserker seal making him all bloodlusty and stuff."

He nodded. "Good. I was able to talk to him for the first time this time around while I was out. He's actually a pretty good guy now that he's not crazy. Can you bring me over to Kyuubi? He said he wanted to thank him."

Kakashi and Chouji helped him to his feet and walked him over to the fox demon. Once there, the tanuki mask reappeared. "Lord Kyuubi! Thank you for freeing me from the bloodlust. The red haze has been lifted from my eyes. I am forever in your debt."

"Then use your new freedom and help your host in any way possible. They will need it all. A group of S-ranked missing-nins are attempting to capture the Monarchy of Tails." The mask's eyes widened.

"Capture the Monarchy of Tails!? Impossible! Then the absence of the seven tails for the past year is because of them!?"

"It is possible. He was last seen near Iwa. Where he went after that, I do not know." Kyuubi then turned to Naruto and company. "The Monarchy of Tails is what you humans call the tailed bijuu. It is a collection of the leaders of the most powerful elemental demon clans in existence. The raccoon, the cat, the kraken, the owl, the wolf, the weasel, the bear, the snake, and the fox. The Nobles of the Monarchy govern almost the entire demon realm, and hold much power as elemental clan heads. I highly doubt that they know of the Monarchy or the clans, as you are now the first humans to learn of them since its formation, but for humans with malicious intent to gain the power of all nine Nobles even without the power of the clans they lead would be disastrous to us all. They must be stopped!" he then caught sight of Rock Lee. "Wait a minute…You! Rock Lee, is it?"

He snapped to attention at the sound of his name. "Yes, Kyuubi-sama?"

Kyuubi chuckled. "Kyuubi-sama. I've always liked how that sounds. Anyways, who were your mother and father?"

Naruto winced as Rock Lee looked down at the ground. His eyes were shaded as he spoke. "I do not know. I was an orphan for as long as I can remember."

Kyuubi stroked his chin as though he had a beard. "I see. And you are physically unable to use any chakra?"

"Yes."

"Really now…" he turned to Shukaku. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking, baron?"

"Yes, I am, now that you mention it. It would explain a lot, and would make things SO much easier to do." Naruto was lost. 'What the heck are they talking about?'

"Yes, I know. I mean, seriously, those eyebrows are simply not natural. It has to be it!" everybody except Lee and Shukaku sweatdropped at this comment while mentally agreeing. Lee was ticked off that they were insulting his looks while Shukaku was nodding his head. Kyuubi whirled around to Rock Lee, cutting him off mid-rant. "Okay, Lee, I'll need you to lie down on the ground and take off your shirt. I want to check something."

He was skeptical, but in the end, he did what he was asked to do. The demon gently grabbed his head and slowly started feeding a small trickle of demon chakra into him. "Does that hurt at all?" he shook his head. "I knew it! He feels no pain, so he's used to it, but there's nothing there, so they must have really botched it! Naruto, can you get this realm to let Shukaku out of Gaara, like me? I'm going to need his help for this."

"Umm, I guess." He ran up to the control booth and started fiddling around with the levers. "Okay, he should be able to do a full-body exit now." He yelled down to the gathering as he started his downward descent.

"Thank you, Naruto!" Kyuubi yelled back. "Okay, Baron, get out here quick."

"With pleasure!" With these words, the mask faded away as Gaara's body was wracked with seizures. A ninth consciousness door appeared, also floating above the control booth. The doors opened, blowing dry, hot air flecked with sand into the clearing.

The Shukaku looked surprisingly a lot like Kyuubi, except his hair, robe, and single tail were a sandy brown color, had a darker tan, and had a face that looked like it smiled a lot. He stretched his arms out and yawned while shaking his head rapidly, causing sand to come flying out. "Oh, man! You would not believe how stuffy it gets in there!" he leaped from the stairs to the ground, where he proceeded to greet everybody. "Hey, people! Good to meet y'all! You guys know me, and I know you, so I think we can skip the introductions." He then turned to Kyuubi and proceeded to knuckle up. "Hey, whassup, brother from a 'nother mother!" the group sweatdropped at this greeting. "Alright, so we gonna do this or what?"

"Yeah, we're ready. I'm kinda worn out from the berserker seal thing, so I'll have to draw a little from you while you do your thing. But then, given his element, I don't think it would activate without any earth chakra being used anyway, demon or not." He turned to the gathering. "Okay. Shikamaru, I'll need you to bind Rock Lee with Kagemane no jutsu (shadow possession technique) on my mark. Chouji, Kiba, Gaara and Kakashi. You guys need to grab his limbs so he doesn't hurt himself. Naruto, I need you to deal with any backlash, like before. I suggest you make a lot of advanced Kage Bunshins, so they can take more than just one hit."

The group nodded as they followed out his orders, with Naruto promptly collapsing to one knee after creating about a thousand Bunshins. Kyuubi and Shukaku nodded their approval. Shukaku laid one hand on Kyuubi's shoulder and the on Lee's forehead. "Good. Get ready!" Kyuubi slammed his palm down onto Lee's stomach and started feeding an enormous amount of chakra into Lee. Lee screamed as his body scrambled frantically to repel the foreign energy.

Shukaku growled. "Oh, no you don't! I know you're in there, and I'm calling you out!" he pushed his hand further into Lee's head as it turned ethereal. Lee screamed even louder as the raccoon forcibly overrode the body's auto-rejection of the chakra. The earth started cracking apart as a seal slowly appeared on his stomach.

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Dun-dun-DUNNNNN! Another cliffhanger! What's going to happen next!? You'll have to find out in the next chapter!

Time for the author's notes!

I honestly really like how this chapter turned out, but if you think that something about it was bad or even so-so, review and tell me! I will listen to all constructive criticism!

Okay, the last time I checked, this story had about 3700 hits, 25 favorites, 72 alerts and about 15 C2s, but I only had 32 reviews! I don't even need to do the math to figure out that 3700/32 is a really messed up ratio! I really want you guys to review for me! I will take absolutely anything you say under consideration for the story! Even a "that was really good! Bye!" would be appreciated! Please!

I'm going to try and do a really long chapter on Naruto's pre-academy years next, so I may or may not update soon. Just know that I'll try and make it as long as possible!

ADD-ON!!!!!! I'm going to add a rant corner to my chapters if something has got me really pissed off while I'm writing it! Same as the omakes, just look in the author's notes to see if there is one that time.

RANT CORNER!!!!!!! I am seriously pissed off about all the yaoi fanfics! I'm serious, I was bored, so I just randomly plug in Naruto as the character and romance as the genre to narrow down the stories, and I go through about 20 pages. ALMOST 3 OUT OF EVERY 4 STORIES I SEE ARE SASUNARU! THAT. IS NOT. RIGHT! Why is it that people are so obsessed with those two being butt buddies!? IT'S SCREWED UP! I mean, sure, sasGAY, I'm not so sure about, but Naruto, no! You can clearly see by his reaction to Konohamaru's Oiroke no jutsu: double knockout girls, AND his opposite reaction to double knockout guys, that he is 100 percent straight! If I ever find out that somebody I personally know is a sasunaru fan, I would find a spoon and gouge their eyeballs out! Well, maybe not, but you get my point! Don't do yaoi!

POLL!!!!!! Okay, guys, I've got a couple more polls for you! First off: Sasuke, semi-emo or canon emo? I really hope you vote for the first one, because I really don't like writing like somebody has a stick up their ass. It's just not my writing style! And the other poll: Itachi, good guy or bad guy? If you vote good guy, don't have a hernia about it, saying, "oh no, since he won't go to Akatsuki, nothing is going to work," because I have it all figured out. Trust me on this one.

Sorry, no omake this time! I DO have an omake planned for the next chapter, however, so do not despair!

Does anybody know where I can find a complete list of all jutsus in Naruto and/or a reliable English to Japanese translator? I would be really grateful for either.

Okay, I think that's all I got. Now move your mouse and click the review button! It has an itch that it can't reach, but you can! Bye!