Disclaimer: I do not own WordGirl or Doctor Who.
WORDGIRL and DOCTOR WHO!
Continued...
When we last saw WordGirl and the Doctor, they had just discovered the secret behind the mysterious cookbook: It's a robot, and one that could prove extremely dangerous if activated! WordGirl and Captain Huggyface retired to their home where they helped their dad with his thanksgiving preparations, while the Doctor went to help U.N.I.T. and the Brigadier handle the book...
….if only he could help them handle the trio of supervillains that are beginning to lay siege to U.N.I.T.'s out-of-town headquarters!
"There he is, Dr. Two-Brains is flying that blimp right towards us..." mumbled the Doctor as he gazed through the
The Brigadier heard. "Blimp, eh? Well then...Captain Flanders! Get one of the harpoon guns from the truck!" he shouted into the noise of soldiers rushing to and fro, getting ready for battle.
"Yes sir!" called Captain Flanders from the inside. He then rushed out, and ran for the truck concealed under a fake bush.
As the massive, metal cannon was rolled along its wheels to the front door and set up, the Doctor couldn't help but ask: "Did I tell you about the vast amount of rays Dr. Two-Brains has been known to use? They could do some nasty things to your soldiers."
"Nonsense, Doctor." replied the Brigadier; "If we pop that balloon, he won't be in the mood to use any such ray. He'll be rather dazed from the crash landing, at which point we can capture him quite easily."
Just then, they heard a loud voice coming from the approaching blimp: "Greetings, soldiers! I am Doctor Two-Brains, and I am here for the cookbook you guys have in your base! I will lay siege to you until that book is in my hands! Give it up now, and I'll let you go!"
"We'll see about that, Dr. Two-Brains!" retorted the Brigadier, who turned to Captain Flanders.
"I'm already aimed, sir!"
"Good!" said the Brigadier, before he raised his right arm: "On my mark!"
"Three!"
"Two!"
"One..."
BBZZZZZZZZPLORTCH!
The instant before the Brigadier could say 'Mark,' a yellow beam erupted from the base of the blimp, and struck the harpoon launcher...giving it a soft white texture!
"Oh, and did I mention I have a ray that turns weapons into cheese? Apparently not... Anyway, don't feel too bad; that's mozzarella cheese, the key ingredient in making pizza!"
Frustrated, the Brigadier prepared to tell Flanders to get the other harpoon...but just as he turned around, he saw Captain Flanders buried up to his neck in strips of pastrami, and another unfamiliar man standing right next to him! "The Butcher!" exclaimed the Doctor.
"Cool! You know my name!" said the Butcher, "Oh, and by the way, thanks for telling us where you're keeping your other weapons too...HAM-ALANCHE!"
Instantly, an avalanche of meat surged from the Butcher's hands, right towards the hidden truck, which was soon buried in ham!
The Brigadier shouted: "Fall Back, everyone; back inside! We must protect that book!" And everyone rushed inside...
….except for the Doctor, who paused for a moment to block a mustard-beam from a condiment ray, one which was initially directed at the Brigadier!
The Brigadier stopped, and called out to the now-immobile Doctor, but before the Doctor could say: "Don't worry about me! I can take care of myself," the Brigadier quickly found himself caught in a similar mustard cocoon.
"Gotcha!" exclaimed Chuck.
"Great, Brigadier." said the Doctor, irritated; "Now we're both trapped by Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy's mustard."
At this point, Dr. Two-Brains' blimp had landed, and the mad scientist plus his two henchmen both got out. The two friends were surrounded by the three food-themed villains, while the door to the compound had closed behind them.
"Alright then," said Dr. Two-Brains as he rubbed his hands together, "Now's the time to hand over that book, soldier boy! Not even WordGirl can help you now!"
*(one scene transition later)*
"HEEEEELLLP! Dr. Two-Brains, the Butcher, and Chuck The Evil Sandwich-Making Guy all broke out of jail!...wait, is this the police station?"
"Nope, that's my backyard you're standing in." said Becky, looking down at the confused man from her second-story window. He thanked her for the correction, and then ran screaming down the street.
Quickly, Becky grabbed Bob, shouted: "WOOOOORRRD UP!" and flew into the sky changed into WordGirl, while Bob threw on his Captain Huggyface outfit...
….so fast, that she missed her Dad frantically knocking on her door! "Becky! Becky! It's an emergency!"
T.J., whose playtime with his WordGirl dolls and ponies was rudely interrupted, asked Mr. Botsford what the problem was. "T.J," Mr. Botsford explained, "I just realized that I'd forgotten the single most important ingredient in a Thanksgiving feast: THE TURKEY!"
"Oh no!"
"I know! Never mind all the fancy Botsford Family cuisine we've been cooking up – if there's no turkey, we can't have a proper Botsford Family Thanksgiving!"
"Well why didn't you go get one yourself?"
"I can't! These Beans a la Botsford require special attention – I need Becky to go to the store and get one for me!"
Again, Mr. Botsford knocked on the door, and called: "Becky? Are you in there?"
T.J. sighed, moaned: "If you really need Becky to do it, then...oh, let me." Then, he pushed his dad aside, and opened the door without a second thought...
….only to find it completely empty!
"Sweet Beany Goodness!" shouted a shocked Mr. Botsford: "Becky's gone!"
*(one scene transition later)*
"I'm gonna make this easy on you both: Hand over the cookbook, and I'll melt the mustard."
"Well, therein lies the problem, Chuck..." the Doctor addressed the sandwich-headed villain, "I can't very well hand you anything while I'm buried under mustard, can I? And besides, the Cuisine Collective is much too dangerous to give to the likes of you!"
"In short," said the Brigadier, "You'll get nothing out of us!"
"OK, fine, have it your way, mister." shot back Dr. Two-Brains, "Just don't expect to get out of that mustard for the next-"
Before the mad scientist could say 'eternity,' however, suddenly a bright flash of light zipped past the two, and pulled the mustard right off them!
Instantly, the Butcher knew what was going on: "Look out, fellas! It's WordGirl!"
"That's right!" shouted WordGirl, flying overhead with two piles of solidified mustard in her hands, and Captain Huggyface on her back; "And you three-"
"Five, actually, counting us." said Dr. Two-Brains' henchman.
"OK...you five really ought to leave these people alone!"
"Good to see you, WordGirl!" shouted the Doctor; "Hold them off while we get inside and secure the Cuisine Collective!"
Captain Huggyface screeched at them, and as the Brigadier and the Doctor rushed towards the Door, WordGirl threw the two gigantic lumps of mustard at the villains, who jumped back to avoid the projectiles.
"Ha! You won't get us so breezily this time WordGirl!" shouted the Butcher, as he raised his hands, and gathered meaty energies around his palms...and before WordGirl could correct him, say that he intended to use 'easily', the Butcher shouted: "SAUSAGE CYCLONE!"
Suddenly, a miniature tornado formed above the Butcher, full of lengthy sausages of all kinds. WordGirl braced herself, and Captain Huggyface opened his mouth wide, as the villain threw the cyclone at her; luckily for WordGirl, Captain Huggyface ate a hole through the tornado, allowing her to escape...
…. "Don't forget about me!" exclaimed Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy, as he blasted a stream of ketchup at WordGirl and Captain Huggyface, forcing her to dodge...
…. "Nor me!" exclaimed Dr. Two-Brains as he threw two little balls at her. Balls that, as soon as they reached her, released a foul-smelling powder all over her!
"Ack! Stinky Cheese!.." she coughed, as the villains prepared to combine all their powers on her...
...when suddenly, the Doctor's umbrella grabbed her by the ankle, and dragged her inside the bunker just before the door closed!
"Dang!" exclaimed Dr. Two-Brains in frustration; "We were too busy fighting WordGirl to enter that bunker!
"So, uh...what do we do now, boss?"
"Hmm...henchmen, get boxes A, R, and V from the blimp...and as for you guys...We're gonna keep laying siege to them while the henchmen are getting ready! Got that!"
"On it!" said the henchman, as he and his buddy Charlie went back to the blimp."
"Yeah, sure!" said the Butcher.
"Yea...um, what does 'siege' mean?"
Dr. Two Brains placed his hand over his face in disappointment.
*(one scene transition later)*
"WordGirl! Are you okay?" asked the Doctor, as WordGirl struggled to recover from the stinky cheese attack.
Yet, a few seconds after being asked, she coughed: "Yeah, I'm fine... where am I?"
"You are in U.N.I.T.'s temporary outpost, WordGirl. In which, we are now trapped and under siege, thanks to Dr. Two-Brains and his friends-"
"Um, sir?" asked one of the soldiers, "What does 'siege' mean?"
Sir Lethbridge-Stewart sighed in disappointment; "And to think that U.N.I.T. soldiers used to be the best of the best..."
"'Siege," WordGirl began, "means 'a persistent or serious attack.' For example: back in medieval times armies would 'lay siege' to their enemies' castles by surrounding them, and using catapults and other such equipment in order to break in, and capture the castle! Sieges were usually very drawn out..."
*(one scene transition later)*
"...because the idea was to exhaust the opponent into giving up! Got it, Chuck?"
When Chuck nodded, the Butcher asked: "So...are we waitin' till they give up?"
"Oh, nonsense. Sure, we could do that...I mean, we can all make our own food, while they have a limited supply...But, assuming my henchmen hurry up, it won't have to come to that! Meantime, though...who wants to make some ham and cheese sandwiches?"
Chuck and the Butcher both gave an enthusiastic response to Dr. Two-Brains' suggestion. "Great! Let's pool together the ingredients!"
*(one scene transition later)*
"Well, I for one do not feel particularly keen to remain under siege until I'm exhausted." said the Brigadier. "We need to get out of here. Any suggestions, Doctor?"
"Well Brigadier," the Doctor replied as he sat down on a box, holding his umbrella like a walking-stick, "I'd say the first order of business is a swift evacuation."
"...That's exactly what I said, Doctor."
"Yes, and I felt it was worth repeating." replied the Doctor, prompting an eye roll from both the Brigadier and WordGirl.
"You didn't need to, Doctor." said Captain Flanders, "We U.N.I.T. soldiers know the dangers of being trapped. I mean, that was partially why I still remember the Miss Power incident so clearly..."
"Wait a sec," cut in WordGirl; "You guys met Miss Power and Colonel Gigglecheeks?"
"Yeah – as soon as she heard that we might try and fight her, she flew all the way across the ocean and tore up U.N.I.T. HQ! Since then, we've been going through a lot of different bases. I hear they're going to set us up under the Tower of London next!"
WordGirl felt sorry for the soldiers. Then, she said: "Well, at least you don't have to worry about her anymore; after I found out she got her strength through bullying, and stood up to her, she seemed too weak to consider coming back to Earth ever again!"
"Hm..." Captain Flanders remarked, "Brigadier said you dealt with her... Do you do this all the time?"
Just then, the Brigadier cut in: "Look, I appreciate small talk as much as the next person, but right now, we are under siege; and if we fail to solve it soon, a dangerous 'Cuisine Collective' will fall into the wrong hands! I really feel we should be focusing on the task at hand!"
"And I," said the Doctor, "don't see the need to focus on it so much! To me, it seems like a rather obvious problem, with a rather obvious solution! Don't you agree, WordGirl?"
The Doctor's remark, plus a sly glance at her, quickly made WordGirl understand: "Me? You want me to dig us out of here?...I guess I was too caught up in talking to think of it myself! I'll do it!"
At that, everyone gathered in the center of the room, while Captain Flanders placed the Cuisine Collective into the container they made for it...
"To start off, WordGirl," began the Brigadier as he pulled out a map of the local surroundings, "I'd suggest digging towards our truck, which is located here." He pointed to a spot on the map as he finished. "Of course, it is buried in meat at the moment..."
"So, dig you guys out, free the truck, then wait until Dr. Two-Brains and the others are chasing you to take them by surprise, right?"
The Brigadier and the Doctor nodded, prompting WordGirl to say: "Sounds like a plan! Huggy, take the rear just in case they break in, and start using food attacks!"
Huggyface screeched in an affirmative manner...then turned towards the Brigadier, saluted, and screeched some more.
"..."
"Oh, sorry," WordGirl said, "Captain Huggyface said: 'Don't you worry sir, you can count on me sir!'"
"Right then...Well then, at ease, Captain." said the Brigadier, and Huggy dropped his paw.
Then, everyone got to work: WordGirl ripped off a section of the wall, and started burrowing a tunnel through the earth, and some of the soldiers (one holding the container with the Cuisine Collective) started in after her. The Doctor and the Brigadier entered soon after, with Huggy and some more soldiers taking up the rear.
As they traveled in the newly-made tunnel, the Doctor suddenly asked the Brigadier: "Is everything OK, Brigadier? I mean, being saluted by a monkey is nothing new."
The Brigadier looked back at the Doctor, and said: "Yes, I've seen stranger. It's just...I have no real reason to trust this monkey. All the other U.N.I.T. soldiers, I know they've been trained, and in some cases even watched them be trained...but Captain Hugginghead-"
"Huggyface," the Doctor corrected.
"...Huggyface, I know no one who would in their right mind teach a monkey how to be a soldier! I just can't bring myself to see him as a comrade!"
"Well then, let me reassure you: he was trained, on the planet Lexicon, where WordGirl also comes from. He also trained her. And as her sidekick, he has been a key ingredient in her many successes. I'd trust him with my safety."
Sir Lethbridge-Stewart sighed, then said: "Thanks for the attempt, Doctor...but I'd rather have some evidence of his skills."
"I'd rather hope you won't have to." replied the Doctor.
*(one scene transition later)*
"Hey, Boss! Are these the things you wanted?"
Dr. Two-Brains paused in his consumption of his grilled cheese sandwich to look at his henchmen...and said: "Yes, exactly! Just the stuff I need!"
"What stuff?" asked Chuck and the Butcher...
...and Dr. Two-Brains responded, as he pulled out various electronic components, "Stuff I need...to build a small, single-shot version of my original Goop Ray!"
He then squished all the parts in his hands together, twisted them around...and then pointed the resulting device at the door, and firing! Instantly, a green beam zapped the door, melting it into glowing goo!
Eager, the Butcher rushed in...and then shouted: "They're not here! WordGirl must've fumbled them out!"
"It's tunneled, Butcher...and now, we need to find out where they're tunneling too!"
"I'll check by the truck!" volunteered Chuck, as he rushed off.
"And I'll keep 'em from breduring back here!" shouted the Butcher, as he squeezed himself into the tunnel.
Dr. Two-Brains, meanwhile, ordered his henchmen to use the blimp to find them, as he ran around the other side of the compound...
*(one scene transition later)*
Finally, WordGirl broke through the surface, right next to the U.N.I.T. soldiers' truck! "Right then," said both WordGirl and the Brigadier at the same time, "let's dig this thing out of all that ham!"
The Brigadier then added: "Every soldier pitch in! Get a move on!"
"YES SIR!" exclaimed all the soldiers, as they rushed towards the truck, and started pulling the ham off of the buried truck. Once they were sure everyone was pitching in, the Brigadier and the Doctor joined in, while WordGirl and Captain Huggyface kept a lookout for trouble...
...which came sooner than expected when, from the tunnel, they heard: "CHICKEN WING FLING!"
No sooner did Captain Huggyface devour the flying fried chicken than Chuck came in from the side, spraying honey mustard all over. Only through a quick use of her snow-breath was WordGirl able to stop the burst of sticky condiments, freezing the honey mustard in midair.
Shortly, Dr. Two-Brains joined in, and everyone was surrounded. "Give up!" the villains proclaimed, "We're not leaving you alone until we get that book!"
"And we won't give it to you!" retorted the Doctor, "The Cuisine Collective is much too dangerous! We won't let you destroy the world!"
"...what? You think we wanna destroy the world?"
"Actually," Chuck added, "We just wanna make some nice cuisine, that's all!"
"That's what you think," the Brigadier added, "but the truth is-"
"Sir! There's something wrong with the book!"
Suddenly, everyone turned towards Captain Flanders, who was struggling to maintain a grip on the box he was holding. In addition to the shaking, yellow light was pouring out from the cracks, and a loud whine was heard...when all of a sudden, the box completely burst open!
Everyone watched as the book rose into the air, yellow energy swirling around it...and it opened itself! Within the folds of it's newly-exposed pages, a yellowish-green image appeared...with the image of a humanoid face with a long, thin moustache!
Then, in a voice with both a robotic tone and a french accent, the image yawned: "Uuuuah! Mes oui, zat was a long sleep! How long was I offline?...On second thought, it never matters. Vhat does matter is ze chef in need! No, wait...three chefs! Today is most surely a lucky one!"
Everyone stared in shock at the floating book-with-a-face, except for the three food-themed villains. Who then asked: "So...you activated because you detected us?"
"Most certain! After all, I am ze Cuisine Collective; I have the best recipes that ze Androgum could provide, and the programming of ze Tersurans, masters of combining ingredients into exceptional cuisine! I am ze perfect kitchen assistant, and know a superb chef vhen my sensors detect one! Lead on, my brothers: Ve need a proper kitchen to practice our art!"
"Well then, let's go there!" With that, Dr. Two-Brains waved his hand, and down dropped a ladder from the overhead blimp. He, the Butcher, and Chuck all climbed onto it, and the ladder raised up, the Cuisine Collective floating right behind them.
"Oh no you don't!" shouted WordGirl, fully recovered from her shock. She grabbed Captain Huggyface, and flew right towards them...
BZZZZZZORT!
...and was hit in the face by a bright beam of yellow light! The Brigadier shouted worriedly as she spiraled out of control, until the Doctor said: "Don't worry, it was just that 'weapons-to-cheese' ray."
Then, as if to prove his point, the ray fired several more times, resulting in all the soldiers holding gooey sticks of mozzarella cheese instead of weapons!
…...
Meanwhile, as the villains loaded onto the blimp, the Cuisine Collective suddenly asked: "Now zhen, vhat are your respective, eh, specialities?"
"Oh, that's easy!" exclaimed Dr. Two-Brains; "I'm all about cheese!"
"Sandwiches are my thing!" said Chuck, and the Butcher finished with: "Yeah, and I'm kind of a meat person myself!"
"Hmmmm...Cheese, sandwiches, and meat... ah, I possess plenty of recipes for zose sorts of dishes, ze finest in le galaxie!"
Suddenly, the Cuisine Collective's electronic face disappeared, and the book projected thousands upon thousands of words onto the walls of the blimp. In no time at all, the three villains realized what they were: recipes.
"Whoa...look at all those recipes...which ones should we try today?" Chuck asked his companions.
"Vhy not all of zhem? Ve can surely manage such a task, no?"
Suddenly, the villains turned towards the Cuisine Collective in confusion; "Um, we can't do all of them! I mean, we're just three guys, and you're just a lalding book!" remarked the Butcher.
It's 'talking book'.
After the Butcher thanked the narrator, the Cuisine Collective's face reappeared (and the recipes disappeared), and it said: "Au contraire! I am ze Cuisine Collective! I can hold ze cooking utensils as vell as any chef vith my energy bands, and I have a built-in heat ray for when ze oven's in use! Vith me, any chef can cook for an entire planet!"
Then, the book floated towards the entrance to the blimp (extending a bit of the yellow energy surrounding it to open the door); "Here, allow me to demonstrate! I shall gather the ingredients and prepare the dishes, and create...a hundred thousand plates of one of ze galaxie's most beloved cuisines!"
"Ooh, sounds interesting...what is it?" asked an interested Dr. Two-Brains...
"Varan Earthling Soup."
Dr. Two-Brains' interest died instantly, but the Cuisine Collective's did not. "Essentiale, you take light chunks of squeezed, stretched human meat, then sprinkle them vith ze best spices of ze planet Varas, broil them, throw in some diced Gelzonkian cliff roots, zen simmer ze mixture in broth made from... Actually, vhy not I just show you vhat I speak of? It is truly a dish to savour!"
Then, with a cry of, "I shall return soon!" the Cuisine Collective floated out of the blimp, and right towards the city...as the villains moaned, "What have we done?"
What indeed? What will the Cusine Collective do now that it is unleashed, and about to lay siege to the city? Can WordGirl and her friends stop it before someone gets hurt?
Will Mr. Botsford be able to find Becky Botsford, and finally get her help with the turkey?
For these answers and more, tune in to the exciting conclusion of this epic adventure of WORDGIRL!
To Be Concluded...
A big, hearty shout out to the loyal readers who are still reading these stories!
Everything ends (for this story) with Part 4. Be on the lookout!