Sorry guys. I'm not allowed to kill Orlando Bloom; my friend's a fangirl and she threatened me. GOMEN NO SAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Paris Hilton made a deal with the devil when she was eight years old. She said, "Devil Guy, make me plastically hot like a disturbed Barbie Doll." The Devil---wondering why the hell anyone would wanna look like a disturbed Barbie Doll but, hey, that's his job—granted her wish.
But now the Devil's back.
Paris was playing tea set with her stuffed animals to pretend she had friends when He came.
Her eyes widened. "No…not you…not…um…what? What am I doing?" she asked, looking around the room, her highlighter hair whipping around.
The Devil sighed. "God why do I get all the noobs…?" He muttered. "Okay, you're gonna die now," he told her.
She clutched her demented elephant (ELEPHANTS ARE EEEEEVIL!) and asked, "Can Flopsy wotten tail come too?"
The Devil looked at the evil demonic stuffed animal and said, "No." Then he used a magical staff made of candy to send small pox into her intestines and slowly eat away at her innards DIE YOU BITCH DIE!
After the devil left the place Paris was at, the author realized that it was not the Devil!
IT
WAS
WRATH!
YAAAAAAAAAAY!
So Wrath decided to make certain readers happy by killing certain people.
"Hello, are you Deondra?"
"Yes…"
"Well, AnimeAddict333 wants you dead. Bye-bye."
BOOM.
Wrath stole Roy's gloves! Wheeeee!
"Hello, are you Rose?"
"Yes…"
"Well, SG1 FMA DC and several others want you dead. Bye-bye."
BOOM.
"Are you P-Diddy?"
"Yo man, I don't even ma own chapta? Dat's messed up yo."
"Um, shut up. Monkey Mist Robo wants you dead. Bye-bye."
BOOM!
"Are
you Chi-chan/Tintin-chan?"
"Lemme guess I'm gonna die."
"Your friend randomly obsessed wants you dead because you insulted Murtagh, even though the author doesn't know who that is. Bye-bye."
"SHI-"
BOOM!