Cold sweat beaded on Terry's forehead. She took in deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. The room was dark and Terry gulped in air. She'd never been afraid of the dark, even as a baby. However, it didn't comfort her either. She tried to tell herself that everything was normal, that nothing had happened, that it had just been a nightmare, but it didn't work. The sweat was making her stick to her blankets.
She kicked off her covers and rolled over, clutching her new teddy bear. Her Uncle Tom had taken it away from her but Lorna had brought it back. She had kept it hidden until bedtime, unsure if he would take it away from her again. He hadn't asked about it though, so Terry thought that it was okay.
Terry stared at her bear. It should have helped to have someone with her when she was having a nightmare, but although it was very pretty, it was just a bear. Terry thought for a minute, but she knew she wouldn't be able to get back to sleep on her own. She bit her lip before she got up and padded out of the room, clutching her bear.
She looked down the hallway. It was dark, although she could hear a few murmurs coming from the bottom floor. Terry peered over the rail and saw Emma and Azazel talking to each other. At first she had been afraid of the two of them. Emma had been kind to her though, even if it was in a distant way. Azazel had even teleported her around until she'd thrown up, but she'd had fun.
Terry pulled herself back. Uncle Tom didn't allow her to see them much though. He always told her that she was supposed to stay in her room. He got angry if she went out too often. Lorna kept telling her that she could come out and explore the large house, that was her new home, but Uncle Tom told her to stay away from the rest.
Many times Terry wished that she was brave. If she was then she would take Lorna's invitation and appease her curiosity. However, she wasn't brave. Uncle Tom had already hit her enough for her to know that she should listen to him. Her long sleeves hid the bruises, although he hadn't had much time to hurt her once they came to the new house.
Lorna's father didn't tolerate his drunken rages, but that didn't mean that they didn't still happen. They were staples of her childhood. Terry had understood every other word, but they were all about his leg and some sort of debt. Terry tried to hide when he became enraged, but he often found her. He'd broken her arm once. It had healed quickly but it had scared Terry forever after.
She shuddered at the memory. He'd grabbed her arm and yanked her in front of his face. His eyes had been wild and he'd started screaming about how she looked wrong. Terry had never thought about how she looked before. She'd counted the freckles on her face and braided her red hair, but she'd never felt like she wasn't pretty. He'd made her feel like she wasn't pretty.
When he wasn't drunk he didn't feel the need to hit her as often. She also knew that Lorna was watching him since he had come to the house. She was Terry's protector. Lorna had told her that she was pretty, the first time she had ever heard that. She'd pulled some of her green hair down and laid it next to Terry's red. She'd smiled at her before tucking the hair behind her ear.
"We're Christmas girls, you and I," she said, "Red and green."
Terry had giggled then. She liked the memory. Terry liked Lorna period. Ever since she had met her two years previous Terry had known that she was special. How could she not be? She was brave and strong. She was younger than everyone else, but she talked to them like equals and did what she liked.
Although Terry wasn't sure exactly what she was fighting, she wasn't sure what any of them were fighting, she knew that she was like a knight in a fairytale. She defended Terry and would yell at Uncle Tom when she got angry at him. At first Terry had been afraid that Uncle Tom would hurt her. Then Lorna's father had come in, his voice cold, and Uncle Tom had left. He'd been angry, but Terry knew that he wouldn't hurt Lorna.
Terry wished she had parents who cared about her. Lorna only had her father; she told Terry that her mother had died long ago. She knew that Lorna missed her, but she told her good things about her mother. Terry liked to listen to Lorna's stories; she had such interesting ones about the adventures that she'd had with her father. Lorna taught her games that her mother had taught her when she was little.
Uncle Tom had told her that both of Terry's parents had died, that he'd been the only family to claim her. He told her that she was lucky to have him as a guardian, that no one else would have taken her. Terry had tried to believe that, but it had become more difficult with each passing year. She didn't believe it any more.
She padded down to Lorna's room and knocked on the door. Terry shuffled from one foot to another. On the other side of the door she heard footsteps. The door opened and Lorna looked at her, her eyes bleary with sleep. Terry clutched the bear closer and swallowed. She knew Lorna wouldn't be mad at her, but it was hard to remind herself that sometimes.
"Terry?" she said, her voice gentle.
Terry shuffled the bear and looked up. Lorna smiled at her.
"Sweetie, did you have another nightmare?" she asked.
Terry nodded.
"Come on in," Lorna said.
Terry scurried inside. She knew that her movements were awkward and ungainly, her posture strange. Lorna was graceful and she wished that she could be that. Instead she was just too skinny, her skin too pale, and her bones too fragile. She managed a small smile as Lorna got back in bed and patted the space next to her.
She climbed in and snuggled next to Lorna. Lorna put one of her hands on her head.
"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.
Terry looked up.
"About what?" she asked.
"Your nightmare," Lorna said.
Terry paused. She could tell Lorna, tell her about the nightmare where she clawed at her throat, unable to call out while her uncle hit her. Still, she was seven now. She wasn't supposed to be having nightmares. She shook her head and Lorna sighed.
"You can tell me," she said.
"I know," Terry said.
Lorna sighed again and rested her head on the pillow. Terry's eyes were open, unclouded by sleep, and she knew that Lorna noticed.
"Having trouble getting back to sleep?"
Terry nodded.
"You know you're safe here, right?" Lorna said.
Terry nodded again. She knew Lorna would keep her safe.
"No one and nothing's going to harm you," she said, "I won't let them."
"I know," Terry whispered.
Lorna frowned. She didn't understand. She didn't know what the dream was about though, so she couldn't. Terry couldn't tell her though.
"You know," Lorna said, "When I was a little girl, and I had nightmares, I would go to my father."
Terry looked up at her, her eyes wide.
"Don't look at me like that," Lorna laughed, "Everyone has nightmares. I had a lot when I was eleven."
Terry thought about how she thought seven was too old to have nightmares. Apparently she was wrong.
"I always felt so safe with my father," Lorna said, "But I had trouble sleeping sometimes. So he'd sing to me to calm me down and get me to sleep."
A frown crossed Terry's face. Lorna's father had never struck her as the type to sing. He didn't strike her as the gentle type either. She had respected him because he was Lorna's father, and he was nice enough to her, but he wasn't someone that she had much contact with. He was out a lot. Terry knew that he was out at the moment, that he wouldn't be back for a few more days.
The idea of him singing was a very strange one. Lorna must have caught her expression, because she laughed again.
"I know, right?" Lorna said.
She smiled. She liked it when Lorna laughed. It made it sound as though nothing was wrong.
"I was a little surprised myself," Lorna said, "But he just wanted me to feel safe and loved."
Terry bit the inside of her cheek. She wished that she had a father like that.
"Do you want to hear the song?" Lorna said.
Terry clutched her bear closer to her and nodded. Lorna smiled and cleared her throat.
"I don't have a very good singing voice, and it's been a while since I was eleven," she said, "So you're going to have to bear with me for a bit, okay?"
Terry smiled and Lorna cleared her throat again. She began twirling a few strands of Terry's hair.
"Der Vater hüt't die Schaf," Lorna sang, her voice quiet, "Die Mutter schüttelt's Bäumelein, da fällt herab ein Träumelein. Schlaf, Kindlein, schlaf."
Her voice was soft and soothing. Terry felt herself calming down.
"Schlaf, Kindlein, schlaf," Lorna continued, "Am Himmel ziehn die Schaf. Die Sternlein sind die Lämmerlein, der Mond, der ist das Schäferlein. Schlaf, Kindlein, schlaf."
The cold sweat on Terry's forehead began to evaporate. She took a deep breath, trying to banish all of her memories of the nightmare.
"Schlaf, Kindlein, schlaf," Lorna murmured, "So schenk' ich dir ein Schaf. Mit einer goldnen Schelle fein, das soll dein Spielgeselle sein. Schlaf, Kindlein, schlaf."
The words were soft, cradling her.
"You have a pretty voice," Terry said.
Lorna cocked her head and smiled.
"Flatterer," she said.
Terry giggled.
"I can sing it again, if you want," Lorna said.
Terry considered it, but she knew that it would send her to sleep. Despite all of Lorna's work she knew she couldn't fall asleep just yet. She would just have the nightmare again.
"No thank you," Terry said.
Lorna put her hand on Terry's shoulder.
"Are you still scared?" she asked.
Terry bit her lip. She didn't like lying to Lorna.
"A little," she admitted.
Lorna lowered her eyes for a moment, thinking.
"You do feel safe here, don't you Terry?" she asked after a few minutes, "I only ask because I want you to feel safe. You're probably in one of the safest places for our kind in the world."
Terry hesitated.
"Our kind?" she asked.
"Mutants," Lorna said.
Terry nodded. She had to remember that. It was mutations, the longest word she knew, that they were using to do strange things and not magic. She was a mutant, and everyone around her were mutants. The only thing Uncle Tom told her about her parents was that her father had been a mutant. Everyone said that it meant she'd be one too. She hadn't seen any sign of it though, but Lorna had told her it would be some time yet before she saw any signs.
"It's dangerous out there for us, and I know it can be scary," Lorna said, "But that's why we've come together. To protect you and everyone like you."
Terry looked back down at her bear. She wasn't sure if that was how Uncle Tom felt. He certainly hadn't tried to protect anyone before he'd come to work with Lorna's father. Terry had learned, at seven years of age, that he didn't care about her.
It had hurt at first, but that had been years ago. The knowledge was just a warning in the back of her head now.
"And that's what we want, a safe world for us all. It doesn't sound like much, but you're smart," Lorna said, "You know that the simplest-sounding things can be hard to find."
Terry gave a shaky nod.
"There are some people out there who want to hurt us for no reason," Lorna said, "But I don't want you to be afraid of them, because they can't touch us. Not when we're all together. I want you to know that."
Terry nodded again, but she couldn't feel afraid of them. Not when Uncle Tom scared her so much, and he was so much closer than those mean people. However, it felt good to hear that Lorna was fighting for her, that she cared so much. Terry wished that Lorna were her sister, her real sister. She would have always had her that way.
"You're always so nice to me," she murmured.
Lorna ruffled her thick red hair.
"Hey," she said, "you deserve people who want to be nice to you."
Terry closed her eyes, pretending as though she were falling asleep. She was sleepy, but that's not why she closed her eyes. She didn't want Lorna to see the tears gathering there.
"You're a good girl, and I know that it can get tough, being a child here," Lorna said, "But as long as someone cares about you, then it's not so bad. It's easier to be brave."
"'m not brave," Terry yawned.
"Of course you are," Lorna said.
As she drifted off to sleep Terry heard Lorna say;
"You just need to find your voice."