A/N: Juat a forwarning during the course of writing this I have found songs that fit in with the story. There is one song that I mention called Decode by Paramore. There is a word that is in the song and I did use when posting a couple lines of lyrics. The word is not the worst thing that could be said but I wanted to give warning that there is a questionable word so that no one gets mad at me for not giving a warning.

I also want to apologize for taking so long to get this one posted there is only one more chapter in this story (it got away from me and went longer than I had originally intended) I do hope to get it finished and posted soon.

Chapter 3

Jennifer went and sat in her office as what seemed like sad song after sad song played. She looked at the play list and wondered about the songs that she had added to this one. She gave a humorless chuckle; 'a physiatrist would have a field day with this wouldn't they?' she thought to herself.

Paramore's Decode had just started playing as she started to think about her relationship with Rodney.

What was it that had drew her to him? He was clueless, and as socially inept as she was. He had a sweet side to him that very few ever got to see, but she had seen it. She knew that he could be abrasive and insulting, yet she knew that he cared for his team. She found so many little things about him enduring. All of those things had combined to make her want to know him better.

At first things had been great, but somewhere along the way things started to change. The shy nervousness started to fade away as he got more comfortable being around her and realized that she wasn't going anywhere. She thought that the longer they were together she would see more of that sweetness that she had seen in him but it seemed that he no longer wanted to show her that part of himself.

She told him that she loved him and she still did, but it wasn't the kind of love that she had always wanted in her life. She had always wanted to find a love like her parents had. She grew up seeing the looks that her parents would give each other. Her father would look at his wife like there was nothing in the world as beautiful. With her mother, she looked at him as if he was her hero, like he could do no wrong.

She sometimes wondered if she was just being naïve. Who really found anything like that anyway, but then again her parents found it why couldn't she? Was it worth it though, to throw away a relationship with a good man that loved her for something she may never find? That just made her think of another question, did he really love her?He told her that he loved her, and she didn't doubt that he did, but in actions, he didn't show it.

Rodney had gone back to his lab for a while but he couldn't seem to concentrate on the work. So he eventually gave up and went back to his quarters.

Once there though, things did not improve any. He just couldn't get his mind to shut off, not that that was new to him. He tried to go to bed but all he did was toss and turn. He came to the conclusion that he would get nothing done until he talked to Jennifer.

He stopped by her quarters first but got no response, which meant she had gone to bed already, or more likely she was in the Infirmary.

As he approached her office, he could hear the music playing but he didn't know the name of the group or the song that was playing.

But I am no gentleman, I can be a prick

And I do regret more than I admit

For a moment if he was truly, brutally honest, that sounded like him.

"Jennifer." Rodney said, as he walked in.

"Rodney, is something wrong?"

"No, no, well actually yes, kind of." He told her, holding up a hand when she opened her mouth to speak.

"Let me go first then you can say whatever it is you want to say." Rodney took a deep breath and started to talk, not really sure what he was going to say.

"Look, first I want to say that I did not intend to be so late for our date tonight, or is it last night technically. Anyway not important when right now. I have no excuse for why. I will admit though that things like that will happen again.

"I know that I have these….issues that make me a less than desirable person to be around at times. There are times when I try to keep these aspects of myself hidden, but it is not easy to change a lifetime of behavior. No matter how much anyone tries.

"I guess what I am really trying to say is I care about you, I love you. I am just not sure that this whole thing is fair to you. Not that I am saying I don't want to be with you. Far from it. I do want to be with you and I can't just walk away. That being said, if you are willing to put up with me I will try my best to do better, but if you would rather end this now, I understand."

As Rodney stopped talking the only sound in the room was the music that came from the speakers of the laptop.

I'm good at seein' the signs

I'm good at reading between the lines

No use in hangin' on

Jennifer wasn't exactly sure what to say at first. She wished that others could see this part of Rodney. She wouldn't have heard so many questioning why she was with him if they had just heard this speech. She was also shocked that Rodney would admit any form of weakness like he had just done.

She was close to telling him that she would work with him to fix things and they could be together, but how much of that was just because of his speech? In the time it took him to say all of that, she was again reminded of why she had found herself drawn to him in the first place, but there was still so many other reasons why she should walk away from him.

Ronon's parting words rang through her head in that moment.

"A truly smart man would do anything to keep you happy and a smile on your face."

Rodney did make her smile but she was not as happy as she had always imagined she would be when she was with the person she was in love with.

"Rodney, I know that was not easy for you to say. I have been sitting here for a while thinking about the two of us for a while now. I do love you, but I don't see this relationship being good for either of us in the long run. I have one thing to ask of you though." Jennifer waited for Rodney to respond.

"Okay what is it?" Rodney asked, wondering what she might ask of him. "We care for each other and I know that I want what is best for you. I hope you feel the same."

Rodney nodded. Noticing again that the song that was playing fit so well with the current situation.

It's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

"Okay then, this is what I am asking for. We stay friends. I would hate to lose your friendship over this. I know that it will probably be a little awkward at first, but I think that in the end as long as we are both happy that things between us will be good."

"Of course." Rodney said. "I totally agree. I think it will be a bit odd but it will be better in the long run then if we ended up hating each other."

Jennifer nodded and closed her laptop, effectively shutting off the music that had still been playing. She stood and walked to Rodney and the two gave each other a friendly hug. Then Jennifer gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

The two walked out of the infirmary together, and went their separate ways. Rodney went back to his lab and Jennifer headed to her quarters knowing that she still needed to clean off the table before taking a quick shower and going to bed.

A/N2: The songs used were Decode by Paramore, Good as Gone by Little Big Town, and Apologize by One Republic. If you would like to hear any of the songs that I have used go to my page there is a link to my LJ that has all of the songs listed there as well and links to all of the songs. As always Reviews are loved :D