Hello again... oops. I forgot to tell you this story wasn't over yet. Yeah, I got more. Did I mention there were a lot of snow days involved? I'm just de-crapping the chapters right now, hopefully, a little. From now on I'll tell you if it's over or not. XD

Thanks for the reviews!

The rest of the crew has materialized in the waiting room when you wake up, all going about their usual activities. The Professor is sleeping, Zoidberg is sobbing hysterically, and Hermes, having flushed a legal notification to Leela's parents in the sewer (which Amy promptly followed with a sweetly-worded reassurance), is trying to convince you not to sue Planet Express Enterprises.

You accede eventually. You can't prove the dent in your pinky finger is from the bee incident (and not from being crammed into an electrical socket), and you wipe away crocodile tears when you learn that you aren't allowed to sue for emotional trauma. Apparently, the warranty on your emotion chip was important and you should have kept it up to date.

"I just can't believe this is happening," Amy whispers solemnly, her arms wrapped around her knees. "The Professor always says they could get maimed or brutally killed on the deliveries, but... it just doesn't feel real until it's actually happening." She sniffles.

"Zoidberg's friends are in danger! And they won't even let Zoidberg back to help with surgery, they won't," the lobster cries. "I can't allow my friends to die without my help!"

"But that's what they do," you put in, though you've been pretending not to listen for hours. "Humans die, right?"

There he goes again. Amy rolls her eyes. Spluh…

"All of them?"

"Yes, Bender. Everyone dies sooner or later," Hermes says wearily, as if this is the thousandth time you've been over this simple concept together. "That's why the word 'inevitable' has been trademarked by Orbiting Meadows funeral homes." His eyes shift, waiting for someone to jump out and charge him royalties just for mentioning it.

"So if they're gonna die sooner or later, why is it better for it to be later?" You glance around the room at the others. "Now's as good a time as any, am I right?"

It's like the whole crew downloads the same look of horror simultaneously.

"Bender, you've said a lot of terrible things to me, most of them this morning, but that is easily the most terrible thing I've ever heard," Amy hisses, glaring a hole into your head.

"Well, I don't take a day off when the rest of you numbskulls do," you say acidically, but not without some pride.

(The thing you don't say is that you're still desperately waiting for an answer.)

"Any news, Professor?" Hermes asks, motioning to the buzzer in the old man's lap that is supposed to be keeping the next of kin informed. The other one was flushed down the toilet, with the letters. Someone ratted out the adopted robot son, unfortunately, so the updates have to come through the geezer now.

"Nothing so far," Farnsworth says drowsily, but a moment after his eyes land on you, he jerks wide awake. "But the real important question, Bender, is did you get the honey?"

For a moment, you don't even remember. "Honey?"

"Yes, the space honey. The extraordinarily valuable and tasty medicinal space honey that I sent you for. Did you end up getting any?"

For the next moment, all you can see is red. "You mean before or after we all got violently killed?"

"Either or."

Amy and Hermes and that gross lobster thing look from you to the Professor with bated breath, because your eyes are glowing with a rage that could shortly mean the end of every living thing in the vicinity. But you don't say anything.

With a slow, methodical movement, you open your chest cavity and retrieve a small jar full of the syrupy stuff. You shoot out the extension in your arm and smash the fragile glass over the Professor's head, laughing maniacally as space honey sprays up on the walls, mixing with the various fluids that humans exude when you bash their skulls in. The Professor crumples to the ground, and somewhere behind you Amy screams-

No, better not.

Simulation Aborted.

Instead, you extend your arm to him painstakingly slowly. "Splendid!" he cries, grabbing for the jar. You let him grasp it but don't immediately let go.

Unfortunately, you need him alive right now.

"How's your spleen, Professor?" you hiss ominously, jerking him closer by the jar until you are staring directly into his foggy, thick glasses.

He blinks back at you vacantly.

Haha. Hopefully this isn't too murderously disturbing... for Bender? Nah... XD Just... don't worry about it!

This is Not The End