A/N: Hey guys, I know it has been awhile. But after watching the Season finale I was so happy I could hardly find the anger and emotions I had to continue writing. But I hate when authors just stop a story with little resolved so I am going to try and do way better. I can't say how often I will update but still I won't give up on this story. Also I still need a Beta so if you want or know anyone interested let me know. Also a lot of requests for Gwen to not accept Arthur so quickly but I'm a fluffy girl I love it. Plus Gwen completely believes she cheated on Arthur sure it stung that he banished her but she also feels guilty for thinking she betrayed him. If someone thinks they cheated and admits it to their significant other, how can they refuse when the person is willing to change their mind when new evidence is brought to the plate? Now it won't be a one two punch for them and live happily ever after but know this story won't be filled with angst and drama. I had enough of that in the real show so I won't add it here.

Disclaimer: I sadly do not own Merlin

Chapter 3

"Hurry Up, Merlin, we don't have all day!" Arthur turned around only to see his man servant wheezing and looking as if he were about to pass out. "Honestly, how can you be winded and exhausted? You are riding a horse! You truly are completely useless aren't you, Merlin".

Merlin had so many retorts to give back, but he knew Arthur was not a complete jerk. Arthur was masking his emotions as he always did in front of Merlin. No matter what happened in life, Arthur thought it was weak to show one's emotions. Merlin sometimes thought maybe Arthur spoke condescendingly so he wouldn't have to dwell on the bigger issues or have to accept the truth of what could or has already happened…Gwen's death. They had been riding for two days with no idea where she was. They asked random travelers but none knew who she was. So they continued to travel hoping they would find her alive enough to break the spell.

"My apologies sire, you know how I am, the bloody idiot who continuously is put in the stocks. Oh the good times my idiocy has brought me," was Merlin's sarcastic reply. If there was one thing they did that relieved stress it was their constant sarcastic showdowns.

"Yes well I could've told you that. Actually I have told you that since the day I met you, glad to know it has finally stuck in that head of yours," Arthur retorted quickly. He would never admit this out loud but he was glad Merlin was with him. Merlin was the only one to not push him when it came to his emotions. Well of course there were times when Merlin pushed more than he would like. Yet when he whipped out his sarcasm, Merlin took the hint that he would not discuss anything until he was ready.

Right now he did not want to talk about anything. Arthur looked up in the sky and couldn't believe how much it contrasted everything he felt. Outside the forest was lively with creatures and birds singing. It looked peaceful and happy. It reminded him of the day he took…Guinevere on their picnic. He could finally say her name again but it still hurt his heart knowing she could be dead. She looked so beautiful that day but she also was about to be killed the same day. It completely resembles what is happening now. He felt elated to know she did not betray him but also horrified to know she is sick and could be…dead. He couldn't imagine her dying and it being his fault. It was exactly like when his father sentenced her to death. He wouldn't let it happen then and he sure as hell will not let it happen now. He will find her and apologize for all eternity if only to save her life. He hopes he can also convince her to come back to Camelot with him. He would do anything to see her by his side as he always intended her to be.

As the silence progressed, Merlin knew Arthur's thoughts were progressing to a dark place. The more he thought about losing Gwen and blaming himself the harder it would be for them to find her. Arthur would be too focused on his sorrow instead of realizing where they were going. Merlin refused to see Gwen die all because Arthur couldn't forgive himself. After all how could Arthur expect Gwen to forgive him if he couldn't even forgive himself? So in order to have Arthur come out of his ridiculous self-loathing he asked a question that may or may not help the situation.

"What did you say to Morgana before you killed her or her puppet rather," Merlin timidly asked. He saw Arthur stiffen and knew this could end badly. One, because Morgana was the reason Gwen was dying. Two, Arthur felt so betrayed last night he almost couldn't even attack her at the beginning of the fight. Sadly, Merlin was also very curious as to what was said. Especially since Arthur is very against killing woman, all that chivalry upbringing. Though she didn't technically die it was a puppet, Arthur still ran her through before anyone figured it out.

"I said even though I knew she was a puppet I will never forgive her. From this day forward, I shall treat her as I treat any other of Camelot's enemies. She no longer has our history to save her life," Arthur said so coldly Merlin wanted to shiver from the hatred in his voice.

"How did you know she was a puppet, or all of her soldiers were for that matter?" Merlin became more confused.

Arthur took a deep breath to calm the anger rising in him, Morgana betrayed him in the worst way and he may never forgive her for the pain she has caused. She is and always will be his sister by blood. He refused to acknowledge her as anything more. He doesn't even know if he could control himself from doing horrible things to her should they ever meet again. He knew he should answer Merlin's question but he still felt the need to comment on Merlin's stupidity. Teasing Merlin always seemed to make him feel better.

"How stupid can you be? Do you not pay attention on the battlefield? Being observant is the best method to survival," he condescended.

"What do you mean? All I noticed was Morgana had a huge army and they were trying to kill us. What else did I need to observe? Besides I shouldn't even be on the battlefield I wasn't trained for it, yet somehow I still continue to save your life. Do I hear a thank you, or a Merlin how amazing you are I shall grant you the status of a lord? No I don't" Merlin retorted.

"A Lord, Merlin? Really? You may have saved my life once or twice but lords can only be someone who will benefit the kingdom. With you as a lord, Camelot would fall into ruin by the next day," Arthur laughed hard and while it was mocking, for the first time in a long time it wasn't a forced laugh.

Merlin smiled at the thought of Arthur feeling better but still wanted his answer. "Well I thank thee for reminding me of why I am so incompetent but you still did not answer my question, sire,".

"Every time I struck down one of her soldiers no blood would be on my sword. I knew they must be magic if not my sword would be covered in blood. They could be killed like Morgana was but no blood ran through their bodies. Also, if Morgana was too frightened to have real men die for her, there was no possible way she would put herself in danger. She was more than likely testing her powers to see if she had a chance to defeat me, or needed more training. Gauge the enemy's strength and weaknesses. She had long found mine," he was referencing Guinevere. Anytime he thought of her, he fell into a deeper hole. He felt like wallowing but knew there would be no time. She would die if he didn't reach her in time.

"Arthur, we will find her," Merlin said with conviction. He knew without Gwen, Arthur could never become the King he is destined to be.

"Where, Merlin? Tell me where she is! No one possibly knows. All her family is gone; Elyan turned his back on her because he decided to be a loyal knight of Camelot. She is dying or according to Morgana could already be dead. Two days ago she said she could be dead! We have no leads or any direction to go. We are wandering aimlessly. She never spoke of a place other than Camelot, the only home she had. The home I took away from her in my anger. The home I loved even more because she loved and hoped for it more than anyone I have ever seen," Arthur could no longer hold it in. The more he yelled the more he wanted to break down and cry. He was being torn up in the inside from his guilt and grief. She was one of the few people who truly loved him for him, who gave him everything he needed when he needed it. She knew the right thing to say, had more faith in him than he had in himself. She was gone and might never come back.

Merlin stood quiet for Arthur's rant. Knowing there was nothing he could say that could quell the pain. However, the more Arthur talked the more he realized where Gwen went. The one person Gwen had come to trust outside of Camelot's walls, his mother.

"Arthur, I know where Gwen is!"

A/N: Ok so I know this isn't my best work but I had to push through writer's block. I promise to update more since summer is about to begin. And yes I did take the puppet idea from Naraku but also do not own Inuyasha just liked the idea. Also it is obviously a cliché for Gwen to be with Merlin's mother but where else is she going to go. Plus it was in the show so I'm sticking to that part at least. Will do better next chap!