Hey guys! Hope you're all feelin good today because this is a really funny, light hearted chapter =] Warning! There is Dursley Bashing!!!! lol Enjoy!
"All ready then Harry?" Remus Lupin called as he stuck his head out the door of the room. A second was all he had to wait before the door from across the hall swung open and out stepped Harry Potter, with his trunk in one hand and Hedwig's cage in the other. The bird squaked loudly at the sight of the hallway.
Remus smiled. He, Sirius and Harry had decided they would help Harry bring the belongings he had with him to Remus's house in the morning. And then they would have to take a trip to the Dursley's to let them know that they were relieved of their position as Harry's wanted only Sirius and Remus should go but Remus insisted he go as well. Harry was happy however that it would be the next day and not immediately. So he was given Sirius's room for the night(so he wouldn't' have to live through the torture of spending the night at one of the other Black's rooms) and Remus and Sirius shared Regulus's room. Originally Remus was to apparate home and pick them up the next day, but he and Sirius had spent half the night chatting anyway so Sirius just conjured up another bed across the room and insisted Remus stay.
"Completely" Harry nodded with a grin.
"Harry, we're going to your uncle's house as soon as we drop your things off at mine" Remus informed him. And just as he expected, Harry's smile turned into a frown.
"Oh come on then, don't look so down, if that pig tries to do anything to you, I'll personally hex him into oblivion" came the voice of Sirius Black as he stepped out of the room from behind Remus. Neatly folding over the cuff of his right sleeve as he did so. Floating along behind him was a small suitcase. Harry suddenly remembered his godfather's decision to live with them as well.
"Not before I transform on the spot and eat him whole" Remus added.
"Oh don't do that Remus, I wouldn't want you to choke on all the fat and die!" Sirius cried in mock terror.
Harry couldn't help but laugh at his two guardians. Those two put together could really lift the mood.
"Or I could just tear him limb from limb and feed him to the dogs" Remus shrugged.
"Ew, I don't want to eat him either...." Sirius made a disgusted face.
It only increased Harry's laughter "If you two are done about how you're going to murder my uncle, then I'd like to get going."
"Sure thing kiddo" Sirius nodded. He then turned to Remus "So are we apparating?"
"No, we'll have to use the floo. Apparations from inside or outside other than myself aren't allowed" Remus explained "If I try to apparate with you two with me you'll both get blasted into the heavens. We'll have to modify that for you Sirius."
"What about me?" Harry spoke up.
"Until you're 17 my shields will have an eye out for you young man" Remus replied with a mischievous smile.
"Hold on, you can't apparate without being murdered but you can floo fine?" Sirius raised a brow.
"There's a password on the floo network. That, both you and Harry will know very soon" Remus replied.
Harry was a bit confused. There was a password? How did that work? And as if Remus had read his mind, he explained "The way the password works is very simple. It's almost like saying the name of your destination itself. Except instead of saying it, you have to think it loud and clear. If it isn't clear enough you'll end up in a completely different place, so it's very important to do that."
Harry nodded. After his trip to Knockturn alley in his second year, he would never mess that rule up again. Ever.
"Ok, now that we've gone through Lupin Lodge 411, let's actually get there, shall we?" Sirius said a bit impatiently.
"Alright then, Sirius, lead the way" Remus shrugged.
So with that, Sirius lead them downstairs and into the living room. Harry was actually a bit stunned as he glanced around the large room. It had a very dark and royal look to it. He noted that everything in the room was either black or green. the walls were a glossy black, bordered by a dark yet threatening green color. The first thing one would see upon walking into the room was the enormous painting of Arcturus Black hanging on the wall above the fireplace. It was mounted on the wall directly across the door, and impossible to miss. Harry stopped and stared hard at the painting, at the strong bold features of the man he didn't exactly recognized. Nevertheless he did see the resemblance between the man and Sirius, which told him he was definitely an important part of the family.
"Believe me, he's not nearly as interesting in person" Sirius gave a dry laugh as he and Remus walked past Harry.
"Tell me about it" Remus added.
"You've met him?" Harry asked as he jogged to catch up with the two men.
"Several times on Platform 9 3/4. Though to him I was just Sirius's good for nothing half blood friend" Remus answered as he approached the fireplace.
"Bloody git, wanted me disowned from the start. He always did like Regulus better..." Sirius grumbled as grabbed a small fancy looking jar from the mantle. He held it out towards Remus, who took a handful of floo powder into his hand. Sirius placed the jar back to it's original place and stepped into the fireplace. muttering about his grandfather the entire time.
Harry had no reply to the interpretation of Arcturus Black that he had received from the two men, so he let the topic go.
"Come on then" Remus said as he entered the fireplace as well. Harry nodded and stepped in front of them.
Remus then cleared his throat "Lupin Lodge" and then dropped he floo power in his hand. Almost immediately Harry felt his surroundings blur, twist, and spin in every direction. For a split second he felt nauseous and then....and then everything became perfectly still. He opened his eyes(not remembering closing them) and saw himself in a completely different location.
He stepped out of the fireplace and looked around he small quaint room.
"Welcome to your new home Harry" Remus said brightly as he stepped out of the fireplace as well.
"Ah, home sweet come" Sirius sighed contently as he followed.
The first thing he saw was the armchair in front of the fireplace, a book hanging on the arm. To the left was a small kitchen area that contained a wooden dining table, a stove and a couple of cabinets. A bit beyond the kitchen was a flight of stairs that Harry assumed, led to the bedrooms upstairs. It was so small yet so convenient. It was perfect.
Remus tried to read Harry's expression "It's not much but-"
"I love it" Harry beamed.
Remus smiled. That was all he needed to hear.
"Come on Harry, you probably want to see your room" Sirius grinned.
"My room?" Harry said with a rather confused expression
"Yes your room" Sirius said grabbing his godson by the wrist and pulling him towards the flight of stairs.
"You've had a room here since you were 5 months old Harry" Remus explained "Sirius and I used to babysit for you all the time back then."
"Yeah, yeah, enough with the details, you have to see it! You're gonna love it! And if you do then Remus owes me 50 galleons" Sirius said hurriedly as he dashed up the stairs.
"Sirius was the one that decorated your room. He said you'd appreciate it one day when you were older and what?!" Remus said as he casually followed after his hyperactive friend. Harry simply smiled.
Sirius led his godson to the very last room on the second floor and threw the door open "Tada!"
Harry peered into the room and saw the walls painted red and gold, a matter of fact it reminded him of the Black's living room. Except instead of everything being black and green, it was all golden and burgundy. The walls were decorated with several posters of various quiditch players. Some Harry recognized and some he didn't. On the wall directly across from the door was a large window with pulled back red and golden curtains. And right underneath the window was...
"A crib?" Harry raised a brow.
"Erm...we might have to get that fixed" Sirius muttered.
"Not to worry" Remus said as he stepped in front of the other two and quickly transfigured the crib into a large four poster bed
"Much better" Harry smiled "I love it."
"50 galleons right now Remus" Sirius huffed.
"50 galleons my foot" Remus replied. He then turned to Harry "We'll let you unpack and get settled in once we take the trip to Privet Drive...alright?"
"Do I have a choice?" Harry winced.
"Not really" Sirius answered.
"Alright then...erm...let's go" Harry shrugged.
"We'll be flooing there if you don't mind" Remus said.
"Again, do I have a choice?" Harry sighed.
"No again" Sirius answered.
"Well then what the heck are we waiting for? Let's just get this over with!" Harry yelled.
"Ah...wait...before we do that..." Sirius intervened "Remus...we look terrible."
Remus just raised a brow.
"If we're going to scare the life out of the pigs then we have to look tough. We have to look like we're not afraid to hex them into oblivion-which by the way we're not but still" Sirius ranted.
"And you're going to do this how?" Remus muttered.
Sirius though for a moment. His face suddenly lit up and that grin came over his face. The grin that told Remus, he had something mischievous in mind. But before he could even say anything, Sirius yelled a quick "I know!" before he dashed downstairs, transforming into his dog form half way.
Harry opened his mouth to say something but Remus beat him to it.
"He'll be back" the werewolf rolled his eyes "2 minutes. Give him 2 minutes max."
Indeed about two minutes later Sirius came running back upstairs. And as he screeched to a halt in front of Remus, he held up two very fancy looking robes to the other's face. Remus studied them for a moment. They were both a sleek black color on the outside, and inside it was a dark green silk. He had to admit, they did look rather dashing.
"And get this!" Sirius yelled as he held up the cuff of one of them. Remus noticed the "S" sewn into it. "And the other one has..." Sirius rushed to flash the cuff of the other one. Remus looked again and saw an "R" imprinted on this one. "Because we must have mercy on the letter "R" and have it stand for Remus instead of Regulus" Sirius nodded "Poor "R." Having to deal with years and years of my baby brother."
Remus chuckled "Seriously?"
"Absolutely Sirius-ly" Sirius nodded "Go on, give it a try. I image you'll look fantastic." He handed the "R" imprinted robe to his friend, who hesitantly slid it on.
"Merlin's beard you do look like you're about to blast someone into oblivion!" Sirius gawked as he studied his friend's new look.
Remus looked around himself.
"He's right you know" Harry nodded "You should definitely make that a part of your permanent wardrobe."
"Are you trying to say that I would look good in Slytherin colors?" Remus mocked an offended look.
"Hey, it's not green and black's fault that they got chosen as the Slytherin colors" Sirius shrugged.
"True, true" Remus nodded "How about you. I'm sure you'll look ten times as handsome."
Sirius laughed as he slipped on his robes as well, proving Remus completely right. The two took a moment to discuss how messed up it was that they were using old Black Family clothing and liking it at the same time.
"Ah, Marauders" Harry sighed "Now that you're fit to assassinate the Dursleys, can we actually go?"
Sirius rolled his eyes "Fine, fine. Impatient son of a-"
"James" Remus cut his friend off.
Harry broke out in laughter "Funny."
"Now, come on then. I was thinking of flooing to the nearest spot on the network to the Dursley's home" Remus said as he began to lead the other two downstairs "I don't think they'll appreciate us popping out of their fireplace at random...."
"Point taken, let's go" Sirius grinned.
Within five minutes flat, both the Marauders and Harry were standing at the door of Number 4 Privet Drive. Harry had taken to hiding behind his two guardians, before they had pushed him in front of them and told him he had to face them eventually.
"Sirius, remember, no hexing unless it's completely necessary...ok?" Remus warned his friend just as he was about to knock.
"I know, I know. No hexing, cursing, jinxing, or bad mouthing unless I completely and utterly have to" Sirius sighed "Now, put on your I'm going to kill you face Moony and knock already."
Remus rolled his eyes. It was like the words went in one ear and came out the other. He raised his fist and sent a loud powerful knock at the door.
It took a while, and for a moment Remus wondered if they were even home. But eventually he heard the sound of the lock clicking and the door swinging open.
And the door swished open to reveal the skinny lanky form of Petunia Dursley. She had casually opened the door but upon seeing the two wizards with her nephew, she froze in shock. "Remus? What are you doing here, and who is that? And why is Harry with you? Did he get in trouble-Oh just come in before the neighbors see you" Petunia said hurriedly as she ushered them all inside.
"Good to see you too Aunt Petunia" Harry grumbled on his way in. Though no one heard but the two older wizards, who both gave him a light thump on the back of the head. Harry rubbed the spot as he was lead into the oh so familiar living room.
"Sit" Petunia half ordered half offered as they entered the living room.
Harry was the first to take a seat on one of the sofas. Remus and Sirius seated themselves on either sides of him, almost as though they were trying to protect him.
And just as Petunia was about to speak, another voice interrupted hers "Petunia?! Who's at the door?"
All three wizards recognized very well the sound of Vernon Dursley's gruesome voice. They heard the sound of his footsteps drawing nearer. Petunia decided against answering his question to let him see for himself. Harry shuddered instinctively, and then remembered the two men seated next to him. Oh yeah, Uncle Vernon didn't stand a chance against a werewolf and an Azkaban escapee. Not even close.
The thought relieved Harry as he saw his uncle come down the hallway into the living room.
The chubby man froze just as his wife had done upon seeing the two wizards sitting protectively beside Harry.
"Who are you?" he grumbled.
"I am Remus Lupin, and this is Harry's godfather, Sirius Black" Remus replied.
"Sirius Black? Aren't you supposed to be in that wizard jail of yours?!" Vernon gawked "I'm handing you in right now!"
"If you even make one step towards that I will personally blast each and every one of you into oblivion" Remus growled in the most threatening voice he could sum up "And then I'm going to report you to your muggle police for child abuse."
That last one seemed to have gotten through to them.
Vernon thought for a while before he sat down next to his wife and said "Ok, what do you want?"
"We are here to discuss your guardianship over Harry" Remus began, addressing Vernon "As you know, he turns 17 in two years. Then he will no longer need guardians but he is still a minor in the wizarding world, meaning he needs to be cared for. Now, originally, you and your wife were appointed as Harry's guardians, seeing his godfather was incapable of taking the place at the time. Sirius is still incapable of it, seeing his name isn't exactly cleared yet. But..." he paused to study Vernon's face for a moment "recently...we have found that Lily Potter's will stated, should Sirius be incapable of fulfilling his role as godfather to her child, the role be passed on to me."
Suddenly, both Dursley's understood where this was going "You're taking him away?" Vernon asked.
"Yes, he will be living under my care from now on...if that is alright with you" Remus added to be polite.
"Bloody hell it's alright with me, just take him already then!" Vernon roared.
"Wait.." Petunia spoke up "If you were his legal guardian all along then why didn't you just take him in the beginning?"
"Because we wanted to keep the blood protection that Lily had left on him. That protection would only be valid if he were under the roof of someone with Lily's blood. That would be you" Remus explained "However I have powerful magical shields up in my home so he will be safe there. And unlike the time of his parent's death, Harry is almost 16 now and fully capable of defending himself, should something happen."
Petunia simply nodded.
"Well then, if you have agreed, we will take your leave" Remus said standing up, pleased this had gone over well without any trouble. He could've sworn it had something to do with the threatening robes.
"Harry, do you have any possessions you would like to collect?" Sirius asked standing up as well. He felt a bit empty, not only had he not spoken the entire time, but he hadn't hexed anyone either. How depressing.
But as Harry shook his head no, an idea hit Sirius.
"Say were exactly is that son of yours...what was his name.....Mudly? Budly? Dubly? Dufly?" Sirius pondered out loud.
"Dudley. He's in his room...what's it to you?" Vernon growled.
"Oh nothing..." Sirius grinned.
"Now Sirius...no need to do anything" Remus began.
"Too late" Sirius said as he flickered his wand behind his back.
"Merlin's beard, you added ears?" Remus groaned hearing the soft incantation that his friend had muttered.
"Yes, a pig ears" Sirius muttered so only the man beside him could hear.
"Well don't leave it unfinished" Remus replied equally as quiet.
"You finish it"
"As you wish Mr. Padfoot" Remus grinned, giving his own wand a flick "Good?"
"Excellent. I must commend you , that was brilliant" Sirius grinned just as wide as his friend.
The two Dursley's just watched curiously as the two wizard muttered back and forth amongst one another. And then suddenly a scream sliced through the air from the second floor. The scream of a very familiar porky young Dursley.
Remus and Sirius turned away quickly to try and hide their immediate laughed. They managed to force(somewhat) straight faces and turned back to the now panicking Dursleys "We must be going then" Remus choked out, trying desperately to suppress his laughter. "Goodbye" Sirius forced "Come along now Harry" he grabbed his godson's arm and pulled him off the couch.
Vernon and Petunia just looked at them oddly before returning their attention to their son, who was now running down the stairs. Remus and Sirius didn't even bother to look back as they headed for the door, knowing that if they did, they would probably end up dying of laughter on the spot. They dragged Harry along with them, and just before they stepped out the front door, the younger managed to catch a glimpse of his cousin. And cracked up himself upon seeing the boy with a set of pig ears and a nose to go with that pig tail that Hagrid had given him all those years ago. But what cracked him up the most was Dudley's new limbs, pink with hooves at the end.
And as soon as the three wizards stepped outside of the Dursley home, they cracked up. The stumbled through the empty streets of Surrey cracking up about what they had done.
"Hey, you don't think it was all the boy's fault do you?" Sirius said suddenly.
"No...are you implying something Padfoot?" Remus asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes.
"Of course not, Moony" Sirius rolled his eyes, taking out his wand once more "What do you say though....you think the other two will like limbs matching their son?"
"I think they'd love it" Remus nodded. And with a flick of both of their wands the job was done....along with a few additional things that...that...well the less said about the things Remus and Sirius did to punish them, the better.
"You guys really are Marauders aren't you?" Harry laughed "You two are so bad."
"Mhm" Remus nodded
"Bad to the bone, baby. Bad to the bone!" Sirius shouted into the sky.
"Now, let's get home. We have a lot to do" Remus said as they walked along.
"And I'm starving!" Sirius complained. All three of them laughed to that.
Needless to say this was one of the best days of 16 year old Harry Potter's life.
So, how was it? I hate how Remus and Sirius are portrayed so seriously in the movies. They're supposed to be best friends, free and happy around each other. I really think Remus is the only one Sirius can be truly mischievous around and vice versa. And I hope you like how I showed them as well =]
Oh and the whole Slytherin robes deal was something my older brother inspired. He was like "Sirius would have looked really good in Slytherin colors. He really has the face for it....Lupin too. You stick them together while they're both wearing Slytherin colors and they're gonna look like mafia or something like that." And I was like "Hmmmm, interesting idea" XD lol
Anywhooo, next chapter will be up sooner, and this time Harry settles in and enjoys the summer break with his new gaurdians. So stick around!! =]
Review!! =]