Authors Note: Definitely trying to be faster about this. This is very dialogue heavy and I hope that's ok for people and it's clear who is talking. It gets a little bit violent toward the end and there are Puck and Santana moments. I know some of you have said you weren't into that and that certainly is not the ultimate pairing of this, but I hope it doesn't keep any of you from the story. Let me know what you guys think and thank you for reading!

She made some story up about not feeling well and escaped to her new apartment. It felt like she was disintegrating as she lay in her bed, sobbing. Still under it was the ache that Brittany had caused by simply even touching her, though she had surely done more than touch her. There was no way of tracking the time with her eyes cemented shut from the world until Puck let himself in with his key. "Heard you didn't feel well. I brought you a coke slurpee and some soup." He felt her forehead. "Fever break?" All she could was nod her head as she bit her lip. She didn't want him to see her cry. He kissed her on the forehead and smoothed out her hair. "You want a shower or just to sleep? You should take your dress off though."

He began going through her drawers, pulling out her favourite pajamas. She let him lift her up and change her. He brought the drink to her lips and she took a long sip. He held her in his arms, almost rocking her back and forth gently, so gently for his large rough hands and arms. She opened her eyes to watch her fingers trace his hands. "Just talk to me like you used to when I couldn't sleep Puck, please."

"Talk to you? Ok. Well, today, I went to the gym, the boxing gym, and there was this guy must have been like seven feet tall…" She snorted in disbelief. "Ok fine, let's agree on 6'6, especially since I was the one that was there and you were doing whatever real work you do. Anyway he had me against the ropes and I was fucked you know? All the guys were cheering him on, because I think they're jealous of me because you're my best friend and they all want to fuck you, but I deal with it, it's a daily struggle, but I am a fighter. Then I slammed him right in the ribs, think I may have even broken one cause he was struggling. He fell to his knees and soon I was victorious. There's nothing like that rush, cept maybe drugs, but you know I'm trying to slow down on all that stuff."

"You are?"

"Yeah… I mean it's not a big deal, but I'm growing up and I want to be successful and focused when I'm at work, even if my work is selling drugs."

"Are you happy Puck? Like really happy?"

"Of course, I have everything I could ever want."

"And Quinn?"

"I don't know about her. It's all so complicated and I don't even know if she's the one I want to be with. But I am happy right now. I'm always happy with you."

"Me too. You're my best friend."

"You're my best friend too."

"Thanks, I think I can go to sleep now."

"I'm going to take a shower, but then I'll be here."

"You can go home if you want."

"No, I miss you over there. I'd rather be here."

"If that's what you want I won't say no."

"Ok goodnight. Stay safe San." He kissed both her cheeks then her forehead, resting his lips against it for a few seconds as if he was murmuring something onto her skin.

And though the pit still pulsed, it felt less like a chasm now and more like a pit again, a pit that if Puck was talking to her could even be forgotten for those few moments.

The sun blinded her as she attempted to open her eyes at noon. Puck and she had not slept next to each other like this since she had gotten her apartment three weeks ago. It was comforting to have someone in the large apartment, but she couldn't help the feeling that it was the wrong someone.

"How you feeling?" Puck said as he rubbed her upright back.

"Better thanks to your slurpee and story."

"Wasn't really a story, more just me."

"Whatever, take a fucking compliment when you finally get one." He hit her over the head with a pillow. "Ok, you win for now, but only cause I have to go for a run."

He looked her body up and down, not in a sexual way but in an inquisitive way. "Why don't we just have pancakes today? I think you can take a day off from the gym." He pinched the bit of her stomach revealed by her shirt. "Please? Now that you moved you never spend any time with me Miss Bidness."

"Fine, if you promise to one day let me get my chance at this seven foot giant you bested."

"We agreed on 6'6!"

"I'd please like chocolate chips in my pancakes, white and dark."

She let her legs hang off of the kitchen island as she picked pieces of pancake off Puck's pile. "It's like you haven't eating in weeks! What do you do at this place?" She giggled half-heartedly before tossing a piece of pancake at him.

Her phone began to ring from the bedroom and she ran in to answer the unknown number. "This is Santana Lopez."

A pause then a sigh, a sign she already recognised. "Hi. It's me. I mean it's Brittany."

"Hi."

"I didn't see you later."

"I felt sick so I went home."

"Oh… I'm sorry you felt sick."

"I didn't fucking feel sick Brittany, you know that."

"I wish you had stayed."

"Don't play head games with me. You never did that so don't start now. How did you even get my number?"

"I asked Puck for it when I couldn't find you later."

"Why did you want to find me?"

"To talk…"

"I think you had that chance and you were a little too busy fucking me."

"I'm sorry San."

"What do you want?"

"I want to see you. I'm sorry for last night."

"Please don't apologise to me."

"That's not a no."

"It's not a yes."

"You can come to my apartment. Sam just left for the road."

"Ok."

"Ok?"

"Yes, ok. Send me the address. I have work at 3, so I can only come over around 2."

"Two works."

"See you then." She let the line go dead. Before venturing back to Puck she leaned her head against the wall, attempting to gather herself for him. There was no need to involve him in any of this.

"Everything ok in there? Pancakes are ready."

"Yep, here I come." She kissed him on the cheek before putting pancakes onto her plate.

"Who was that?"

"Just work shit."

"Sucks. Hey, I saw Brittany last time. She asked for your number, hope that's ok."

"Yeah of course."

"You guys were just such close friends, so I thought you might want to see her now that you're back sort of indefinitely."

"It's fine Puck, ok?"

"Do you have your period cause you're being a lot more Snix than San."

"What was a rule I taught you when I first got my period?"

"Never ask a girl if she has her period, because it is demeaning and makes her seem owned by her reproductive cycle."

"Good boy," she said as she flicked his ear. "Thanks for these pancakes Pucky. They are just what I need right now."

Brittany lived in one of the nicest apartment buildings in all of Miami, well so did Santana, but it was worth noting she thought. It had security outside who requested her name as soon as her own security guard opened the door for her. Apparently, Miss Pierce had told them of her arrival and they sent her right up to the penthouse, where she found Brittany nervously biting her nails on a couch. "You came," she basically sighed.

"I don't go back on my agreements."

"I'm sorry about last night. I really am."

"What part? The part where you stripped me, or fucked me, or left me?"

"All of it. I've just been so mad at you for so long."

"You are absolutely entitled to that. It's probably better that you stay that way."

"Do you know that I came to your school?"

"What?"

"At the beginning of your sophomore year. I think I thought that once you came back from school for the summer you would come back to me. I missed you so much and I thought maybe you missed me that much too. So when you didn't I saved the money and went up there. I told Puck I wanted to surprise you so he gave me all this information about you. Where you lived, what you class schedule was like. This was when Quinn and he were pretty into each other, so he figured it could only help him. Anyway, I got there and I saw you right away, but you were with a guy, and you guys were together, I could tell. Then I came home and started dating Sam and now we're engaged."

"Luke."

"What?"

"Luke was my boyfriend for some of college."

"You guys looked really happy together."

"Not really… I mean I wasn't really happy with him. We fought a lot about how he cared for me more than I cared for him. He said it seemed like there was this last hurdle he couldn't jump no matter how hard he tried. Even when he thought he reached it there would be something I did to realise he never could."

"Why?"

"You're the hurdle Brittany."

"San…" Brittany crossed the space between them. She placed her hands on either side of Santana's face, carefully studying it, before kissing her. Explosions covered Santana's body. No one else had ever had her like Brittany. No one else had ever had that control over her body. Quickly, Santana's clothes were almost entirely on the floor, creating a path to the bedroom, where Brittany lowered her onto the bed. It embarrassed Santana how easy it was for Brittany to unwind her and send her into oblivion, falling until Britt braced her, forced her to stay with her as they panted together.

They stared at each other, Santana trying to remember if it had ever been like that before, or if it had always been like that. "San, what are you like with other people?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like when you sleep with other people."

"You mean boys?"

"Or girls."

"I haven't slept with any other girls, just you."

"Then boys."

"I don't know. I mean it makes me angry, being with them makes me angry a lot of time, so I guess maybe I'm an angry fucker."

"I don't like that word, fuck. I don't like fucking."

"You fucked me last night. That was fucking."

"I didn't like it. I don't know why I did it."

"You don't have to fuck me to dominate me Britt. You always do anyway. I guess that's the difference with you and all the boys. I'm always in control."

"Is that why you broke up with me? You were scared of being out of control."

"No, that's not why. Of course I was and am terrified of it, but it doesn't matter as much as other things."

"Then why?"

"It's so complicated. I don't want to talk about it."

"I do. You broke my heart."

"And you're engaged now, so you obviously got over it."

"Don't be mean, not to me. You aren't mean to me."

"I'm mean to everyone. I'm a fucking bitch."

"Not everyone. Not me. That's how I knew you liked me as much as I liked you. I watched you at all these parties on the attack for months, admired you, and then Puck introduced us and you didn't have any kind of snide comment. I knew you felt it too."

"Felt what?"

"That electricity, like we were meant to be together."

"Those are some big words." Santana turned away from Brittany, so she didn't have to see the hurt on Brittany's face.

"Don't do that. Don't pretend you don't know it too."

"So what Brittany? So are you going to just leave Sam? Pack your things up from this perfect life and leave him a note with the ring saying sorry but not really that sorry."

"I am sorry that I have to do that to him."

"You're not leaving Sam." She couldn't take it anymore. She stood up and began finding her clothes around the apartment as Brittany followed her with a sheet barely covering her.

"What? Why would I not leave Sam?"

"Because I don't want you to."

"But you want us to be together?"

"No, I don't want that."

"Excuse me?"

"I said things were complicated and they still are."

"What am I supposed to do?"

"You stay with Sam and we have one blissful afternoon together."

"I can't end this. I can't stop how I feel about you, maybe you can, but it's constant for me."

"You don't think it's constant for me? You don't think as soon as I realised his hand was on your back I didn't feel like vomiting, or sobbing, or killing him. I feel all of those things, but I love you more than I feel those things."

"You're a coward."

"Ok, this obviously isn't getting anywhere, so I'll just leave and you do what you want to do and call me if you need a good fuck once and a while." She felt the white-hot slap before she heard the stinging sound. "And apparently you want it to be a rough fuck." Again the feeling before the sound.

"Stop doing this right now." And then Santana broke down. The sobs from last night returned with an increased fervour.

"Why can't you trust me? I wouldn't do this if I didn't love you more than anything. I'm here and no Brittany we don't fuck I know that, because I've fucked and it's sure not like that."

"You make me crazy."

"You make me crazy. You always have. I can't though, Britt, I can't be crazy."

"I'll stay with Sam for now, but I can only put off a wedding for so long."

"You shouldn't put off the wedding."

"Of course I should. Didn't you hear me when I said that we were meant for each other? Those aren't words I just throw out. We're not perfect, Sam and me, it's not perfect, it looks like it, but you're my hurdle and he's trying as hard as he can, but you're pretty wedged in there. I love you Santana, more than anyone, always."

"Always me too." They leaned their foreheads against each with their deep breaths chasing each other across the space between their noses. "I have to go to work."

"You haven't left and I already miss you so much it hurts."

"I always miss you so much it hurts."

"Always me too."

Santana kissed her forehead then her lips, gathering the remains of her clothes and making her way out the door. If she was being honest the moment she saw Brittany in that bar her first night back she knew it would come to this. Still, if she was being even more honest she knew it could not end well. Not with her family and Brittany's family. She knew Brittany didn't know how involved her father was with the Fabrays. He may fronted himself as an honourable lawyer, but some of his clients were much less than honourable.

Her phone ringing thrust her back into reality. Puck flashed across the screen. "Hey."

"You need to get down here now," But it wasn't Puck's voice, it was their friend Matt's.

"Where? What's wrong?"

"It's Puck, they jumped him. Your dad's house now. The doctor is looking at him now and it doesn't look great."

"I'll be there as soon as possible." She didn't realise the possibility of going from utter bliss to completely consuming terror.

By breaking a couple of traffic laws they arrived at the house fifteen minutes later. Santana ran out of the car into her former bedroom, where Puck lay sprawled on the bed. Matt was discussing something with a doctor. Puck's eyes were puffy and swollen with a black and purple coating covering his cheeks nose, even his chin. She could already see two places where stitches held red skin together. She ghosted her fingers over his face, not able to touch it for fear of hurting him.

Matt joined her at his bedside. "Some Fabray assholes jumped him. Nose and his right hand are broken. Doctor said there's nothing more we can do. He's got a cast and he wants him to come in, but you know how we need to avoid hospitals."

"Which Fabray assholes?"

"Think some of Finn's cronies, you know Sebastian, that new kid Ryder I think, Puck's friend Brittany's little brother."

"Brittany Pierce?"

"Yeah we went to high school with her."

"Her brother hangs with the Fabrays now?"

"Basic selling and crony duties, but yeah."

"Can you get Ryder for me?"

"Sure, shouldn't be too hard if we watch his movement."

"I want you to get him for me, but you don't do anything to him. This is too personal; I want to handle it."

"What are you going to do?"

"He's certainly not going to look as good as Puck does now."

"Are you sure you want to do this San? We've been friends for years and sure you can be a bitch sometimes, well a lot of the time. This is real though. You may run the legal business, but you can't come back from this."

"Am I the boss?"

"Of course."

"Then I want you to get Ryder and bring him to me."

"Ok, but there's a better place for us to do this. There's a place we usually do this. Once I have him I'll text you the address."

"Good, and make sure no one hurts him. I will take care of that."

It took a few days to track Ryder down. She didn't see Brittany at all those few days. Sam was back in town and she saw them out together. Brittany tried to catch her eye or approach her, but as soon as she saw them arrive she tried to make her way to a different place of business. So she spent her days watching bad television with Puck and eating junk food. He was acting tough, but she knew more than anything it had broken his pride to be jumped like that. They didn't talk about. She saw it every time he winced and tried to hide it from her. Every wince only built up her anger. It was Snix in a completely different way. Not the drunk Snix of her college nights, but whenever she thought about she saw red, blood red. She had never felt this before. It was the first time she hadn't been able to see her family deliver their promise to stay safe. She knew she had to do something.

Santana took a deep breath as she moved the handle of the bat from one hand to the other, the rubber chafing against her hands. Matt looked back at her and her metal bat from the front seat where he directed her driver. He smiled at her, a caring smile. She always liked Matt. He was one of Puck's best friends, but unlike most of them it wasn't just about fucking around and partying. Matt had always had something to prove. She always thought he was a good influence for Puck. Still he ended up just like Puck, doing illegal things. Not that she judged anyone about that. She understood what it came too.

The car lurched to a stop and Matt handed her a black ski mask. "Probably don't want them knowing you're running part of the operation yet."

What was usually a busy waterfront restaurant was empty and had many burly men smoking outside. They gave her a head nod in respect then showed her to the so named Ryder.

He was tied to a chair and his eyes were covered. There was no need to cover his mouth, no one could find him.

"Do you know why you're here Ryder?" Santana asked as she circled the chair.

"No, I mean I swear I just did it because I was told too. I don't got any choices of what I do and I barely even touched him. I mean I maybe got a kick in but that's just because they were calling me a pussy and stuff. I don't even like doing that shit."

Wack. Crack. The bat made swift contact to his right knee. He began crying immediately, and pleading soon after. "Please, please, I've got a mom and a dad and I don't want to die." It disgusted her the sounds of agony he made between each world as blood trickled down his pant leg, still she attempted to keep her voice steady.

"You think I'm going to kill you. Do you really think you're worth that? You're nothing."

"You're right. I'm nothing and I'm sorry. Quinn told Finn to do it. All the guys said Puck told Quinn he was going to stop fucking her, because he's got a new girlfriend or something and he's done with Quinn. She got so pissed she told Finn he like attacked her or something."

"Good story."

"It's true I promise. Tommy Pierce told me all that and his sister is best friends with Quinn so he'd know. Tommy Pierce, he was the only who really got at Puck's face."

"I'm done with this kid." She handed the bat to Matt before walking out to the car. He followed her. "Break his nose, maybe a cheek bone or both and both knees."

"You ok San? You look a little green." Then right there she vomited next to the car. "Fuck man. Let's get you back to Puck."

"I don't want to go there, just take me home. Please, just home."

"Ok ok, c'mon." He helped her into the car and as they joined the whir and movement of traffic still all she could hear was the pain she had caused. It didn't give her the satisfaction she thought it would. All she could think about was his family, worrying about where he was and see herself worrying about Puck. Still she knew she needed to show everyone that she was serious about the business. Thankfully Matt was the only one to witness her post torture vomit. Now, all she really wanted, though she hated to admit it, was Brittany.

When she was behind the safety of her apartment door she dialled the number. "Hello this is Brittany."

"Hey."

"Oh hey Maci I am actually just out at the grocery store with Sam right now, but I can definitely cover your shift at the dance studio tonight." She was pretending it wasn't her.

"I just needed to hear your voice. I wanted to make sure you were real."

"Tonight? What time is your shift? Oh 6-12. Yeah I can make it. I know Sam, but we can reschedule for tomorrow night, we always have dinner with your parents."

"No, don't do that. It's fine. You do what you have to do."

"It's no trouble at all."

"No. I'm fine. I really am fine."

"Are you sure? Well, then maybe I'll see you on Tuesday once Sam leaves?"

"We'll talk later."

"Sounds great."

After they hung up she knew she had never called. She was doing this to the both of them and it already hadn't started well and she knew it could not end well.