It was still dark when Shinji woke up. He looked around the tent. Rei was lying some distance away from him facing away from them. Asuka was however closer with her arm draped across him. He gently moved it off of him as he sat up, his bladder calling him to relieve himself.

Slowly and quietly he made his way out of the tent to the small section of debris they had designated as a bathroom for privacy and began to remove his plugsuit. It was one of the inconveniences of the journey that they had to remove their plugsuits if they needed to answer the call of nature. He could however imagine things were likely to be much more awkward for Asuka and Rei than for him.

Finally when he was done he began the process of putting the suit back on again. He didn't bother with the catch to tighten it. There was no point. It only made it harder to sleep. As he rounded back towards the tent he looked up at the stars. Without any light pollution from civilization they could all be seen so clearly. An endless sea of stars spanning across and endless void.

He took the time to trace in his mind a number of constellations.

The last time he had looked up at the stars like this was with Kaworu. They had been playing the piano again and Shinji had asked if Kaworu had wished to look up at the stars with him. Shinji had told the silver haired boy that he had enjoyed looking at the stars. It helped keep him calm and in a way ground him.

Kaworu had mused to him that the stars were in many ways a reflection of who Shinji was. Shinji feared change and the pain it could potentially bring. The stars were one thing that never changed, they were always out there.

Shinji knew deep that that it wasn't strictly true that nothing had changed out there it was a slow and gradual change to their eyes but the stars did change. Stars died over time and new ones were born. Yet it always looked the same to Shinji.

Even now with his last memory of this activity being with Kaworu it was helping to keep him calm. Shinji felt strange when he thought about Kaworu and what he had witnessed happen to the boy. Kaworu was the only person to have shown him genuine kindness, the only person he could call a friend and now he had been taken away from Shinji.

'It was my fault... I didn't listen to him. Asuka is right, I'm an idiot.'

All Shinji had wanted to do was try to put things right, to try to get them to like him again and to try to be needed again. He looked back upwards scanning the horizon. The air was still, no breezes were blowing through.

'After fourteen years the only thing that had stayed the same has been them.'

Just at that moment a single star appeared to fall from the sky. Shinji couldn't help but smile as he saw it, a shooting star the first he had seen in a very long time. Back in Tokyo-3 he rarely got the chance to look at the stars, the light from the buildings made them harder to see. The last time he had seen a shooting star was before he moved to Tokyo-3. He thought for a moment about the folklore behind shooting stars. It seemed stupid but he closed his eyes and made a wish. It wouldn't come true but it seemed harmless.

As he finally opened his eyes he saw another flash. This one was closer to the ground and much more intense than the shooting star. This was followed by another flash and another. He looked out and saw that there were three lights off in the distance. The three of them were high above the ground and seemed to be coming towards them.

He tensed up realizing that something was very wrong with this. Willing himself to move he dashed back inside the tent. Without any further hesitation he started to shake Asuka by the shoulder.

"Asu- Captain Shikinami…"

She groggily opened her eyes, "W-What is it Shinji?"

"Something… somethings outside, coming towards us."

Shinji half expected her to call him an idiot or blame his imagination. Instead, much to his surprise she pulled out one of her measurement tools and after a few seconds of checking snapped it shut.

He eyes widened as she spoke, "Shit, Nemesis Series are close. Wake up Rei and meet me outside."

"N-Nemesis Series? What ar-"

Asuka gave no time for him to finish his question, instead cutting him off almost immediately. "We don't have time for your questions, just do it."

"Y-Yes…" he nodded opting to follow her instructions.

Asuka grabbed another device from her pack and dashed out of the tent looking forwards the three lights heading towards them. She tapped a few buttons on the device and placed it down on the ground just as Shinji and Rei emerged from the tent.

"You two, face down on the ground next to me. We have three of the Nemesis Series coming towards us. Probably scouts but we can't rule out them looking for us." She looked at Rei as she said the words.

"We should be able to scramble their sensors, make them think there is nothing here. Its experimental technology but it should work. We just have to remain as still as we can, so lie face down, do not move and do not speak. Understood?"

Rei nodded.

Asuka turned to Shinji, "What ar-"

"Shinji!"

"Sorry."

Shinji shut up immediately and followed Asuka's example of lying face down near to the device Asuka had planted. He could hear the three Nemesis Units nearing their position now. They were emitting a low machine-like drone.

He started to take deep breaths as his heart bagan to pound in his chest. He turned his head slightly to see Asuka looking straight at him. Her gaze was fixed on him yet her mouth was curled into a warm reassuring smile. Without any words she was telling him that they would get through this. He noticed that she too was taking the same deep breaths in sync with him.

Was she just as scared as he was? He suddenly felt her hand in his. Her fingers intertwined with his as three separate spotlights from the Units started to pass over them. Asuka's hand tightened instinctively around his as the lights continued to scan the entire area.

They would pass over their bodies slowly and then trace the entirety of their small campsite. Shinji felt the heat from the searchlight as it passed over him. Two of the Units could be seen moving off into the distance but one remained above them.

Shinji held his breath as its light shone directly onto him once again. The Unit it belonged to shifted its position directly above all three of their bodies where it remained for what seemed like an eternity.

He began to wonder if maybe it had spotted them? The experimental device that Asuka said would jam their sensors might have failed. He began to wonder what would happen if they were caught?

Realizing that he knew nothing of the Nemesis Series, were they man-made or something else? Products of NERV and his father? There were so many unanswered questions about this world. So many unknowns.

He swallowed as the area around him continued to be illuminated completely by the Nemesis Units searchlight. He could see Asuka's eye looking around frantically, her hand tightening around his even more to the point that it hurt.

His own eyes looked upwards towards the Unit. It was still directly above them and lowering itself. He could begin make out some of its features.

It was mostly comprised of a large disc-like body with a radius of maybe four or so metres. From the middle of the body extending outwards of It were two sharpened prongs each measuring around seven and a half metres. To Shinji it looked similar to a twisted version of a starship from an old Science Fiction show he used to watch as a child.

On the middle of the bottom of the disc was the searchlight but around it was a circular pattern made up of triangles, within each one sat what looked like an eye.

He felt sweat start to trickle down his face from the heat the Unit was giving off. Shinji resisted the urge to shift his body due to the growing discomfort from lying on the ground. Instead he did exactly what Asuka had told him, remained as perfectly still as he could. Between them and the Unit he could see a thin octagonal orange flicker from the devices A.T. Field.

Shinji began to count how long it remained above them. Ten seconds turned into twenty, twenty into thirty and thirty into a minute. Finally after two and a half minutes the Unit started to move upwards once more before speeding off into the distance to resume the other members of its group.

Somehow they had survived. The device had worked. He was sure he even heard Rei breathing a sigh of relief as the three of them scrambled to their feet. He was trembling as he saw Asuka looking off in the distance, her face had turned incredibly pale.

"It worked… we're still alive, somehow." she sighed in relief.

"Captain Shikinami."

She turned as he addressed her, "I guess you did a good job Shinji, good spot. Without you they'd have gotten us."

"T-Thank you captain." Shinji stammered out. His body still trembling in fear.

"Asuka." Her reply came swiftly.

"What?" Shinji questioned her.

"My name is Asuka, I gave you permission to call me it, or don't you remember?"

Shinji nodded and smiled as he thought back to that time. She had come into his room just after the battle against the falling Angel. His hands had been bandaged at the time from the fight and she had asked if she could spend the night in there. She had said he could call her Asuka.

"I… I do remember. Thank you Asuka."

Asuka turned to Rei, "You may as well call me Asuka too. You're not under my command so it's not like rank matters. Make no mistake though, I'm still in charge here. You two are technically prisoners of WILLE"

"I will do that." Rei replied, as ever in an economical fashion.

"We shouldn't stay here any longer. I know it's earlier than expected but we don't know if we just got lucky that one time. We should start moving. Rei nodded to her instructions and went back into the tent. Shinji began to move but stopped when he felt Asuka grabbing him by the wrist.

"Asuka…" He turned to see her with her head bowed, looking towards the ground. For a time she said nothing but then her voice came slowly and quietly.

"It was me."

"Huh?" He replied.

"The voice you heard before you woke up. It was my voice asking you to help me. I was on a mission to retrieve Unit 01 from orbit. I got hold of the satellite it was in and began to transport it when we were attacked by one of the Nemesis series, a 4B to be precise. I yelled out for you to help me and then… well Unit 01 woke up destroyed the 4B and then we found you inside."

"I… Asuka…" Shinji trailed off, not completely sure what to say to that. He had remembered hearing a voice before he had woken up but he wasn't sure what it could be. Why had Asuka yelled for him to help her?

"Don't think this means I forgive you Shinji, there is a lot you have to answer for. I can't forgive you, not yet and nor can anyone else. Not for a long time, do you understand?"

Shinji nodded, "Yeah… I do."

Asuka watched as he ducked back into the tent and gave herself some time to calm down from what had just happened. They were safe for now, if Shinji hadn't have spotted them coming when he did they surely would have died, they had gotten lucky. They had nothing to warn them earlier about potential threats either. Maybe next night they could make use of a guard system. Have them take turns to stand watch. It wasn't ideal but it could work.

She eyes followed Shinji as she saw his figure in the tent packing away his stuff. She had been so sure in her hatred of him. All those years she had blamed him for what had happened. Said she would be unable to forgive him for what he had done. Suddenly she wasn't so sure anymore. It was just like her arrival in Tokyo-3 all over again. Going from not needing anyone to wanting someone.

When she had woke up and found out what had happened to the world and to Shinji she had made a vow. To not let anyone in ever again, she hadn't needed anyone or anything ever again. She could take care of herself. Aside from a few desperate and experimental nights with Mari she had stayed true to those words. Those had been few and far between though, neither had an interest in any sort of relationship it was just physical.

'Damn you Shinji Ikari. How can you do this to me again?'

XXX

Asuka was staring out across the darkened landscape, her eye struggling to remain open. There was nothing out there. No movement or activity. It was mostly flat aside from a few sections of scattered debris. They had long since left the limits of what was Tokyo-3. Where exactly they were she couldn't say, they didn't have maps of the old world anymore. There was no need.

This could have once been a small town, population of a couple of thousand or so. Where they were camping could have once been someone's home, or a school or a shop. It could have thrived with life once but now it was just flat land, scattered debris and a smattering of red dust.

She pulled her legs up to her chest and shivered trying to capture whatever warmth she could from the campfire. The flames flickered as a gentle breeze blew through the area. She looked up towards the sky viewing the stars. Only a few weeks ago she was up there in Unit 02. The third attempt to rescue Shinji Ikari. She hadn't stopped to really think about that. For years her species had longed to be amongst the stars, and she had now joined the ranks of the few who had achieved it.

Once upon a time that might have been a cause for celebration, now there was nothing. There was no world to celebrate her success. There was no pride felt when she got him back. Just a confusing mixture of anger, hatred and happiness at recovering him.

Their journey today had been uneventful. After what had happened yesterday between Shinji and Rei she had kept an eye on the two of them making sure she walked in the middle of them and keeping Shinji closer to her than usual. She didn't want a repeat of what had happened yesterday. Truth be told her body was beginning to run on fumes, if Shinji snapped again she might not have the strength to pull him off of Rei.

Fortunately aside from the appearance of the three members of the Nemesis series nothing had happened. Neither provided any conversation but it was likely for the best.

She rubbed her eyes and yawned wishing she had something to occupy her mind. She had opted to go second in their guarding of the camp. Shinji would watch for the first few hours, then Asuka and finally Rei. As it was nothing had appeared all night. She checked her scanner again. The L Barrier Density was starting to go down. By the end of the next day, if they got lucky, they would be within scanning range. Search parties from the outpost or even the Wunder might be able to pick them up.

She'd finally be able to get out of this plugsuit properly then and take a shower. She'd be able to eat some real food and even use a real bathroom rather than squat behind a rock like an animal. It was weird for her to think that the Asuka of fourteen years ago wouldn't have considered doing anything like that. That Asuka of fourteen years ago only had the Eva to concern herself with, she didn't have to worry about going on supply runs or keeping people alive. She could pilot and then shut away the rest of the world.

A tap on her shoulder startled her and brought her out of her reverie. She turned and looked up to see Rei standing there.

"Oh it's you Rei. Is it that time already, I was starting to have so much fun as well." She said to her.

"Yes. You should get some sleep now."

"To the point as well. Yeah, I will."

Asuka stood up and patted Rei on the shoulder before starting back towards the tent. She got half way before Rei spoke again.

"Captain Shikinami… Asuka, I was curious. Why do you and Ikari call me Rei Ayanami now when you said before that I was not Rei?"

Rei had been contemplating this since being attacked the previous day. In that one moment both Shinji and Asuka had started calling her Rei despite before seemingly going to great lengths to not call her that. As far as Rei could see nothing had changed, so why did they alter their naming of her. Especially if they believed she was not Rei Ayanami.

Asuka simply smiled, "In the brats' case it's probably guilt. He realizes what he said to you was unfair, it isn't your fault you look like the Rei Ayanami he once knew. He also realizes how stupid it was to attack you so he's calling you Rei as a way of making up for that."

"And what about you?" Rei asked.

"It's easier than calling you clone-girl all the time." Asuka replied simply.

"I see. Then I still do not know who I am." Rei replied. There was a hint of sadness to the blue haired girls words.

'You and me both' Asuka thought to her self.

Rei turned away from her and looked straight ahead like some sort of sentry robot from a science fiction film. Asuka shook her head and sighed before moving back into the tent. She wasn't really sure how to handle Rei at this moment in time. Rei was technically their enemy, Asuka should by all rights hate the girl. She shouldn't have allowed her to join with them. Yet she had done.

Once inside she saw Shinji was sitting up rubbing his red ringed eyes, the boy had been crying again. When he saw her he looked away trying to hide that fact.

"You're awake." She stated.

He nodded, "Yeah I…"

"Bad dream?"

He sighed, there was no point in hiding it from her. "Yeah."

"There will be a lot more of them to come."

"I know." He said dejectedly.

"Well at least try to get some more sleep. We're nearing our destination but we still have another day and a half of walking I imagine as well as your guard duty tomorrow night so you'll need your strength. I don't want you missing anything important."

"I… I'll try." He gave a small nod before rolling back onto his side and shutting his eyes.

She sighed and climbed into the sleeping bag beside him. Almost instantly her hand reached out to the same place it had done for the past two evenings and rested on his stomach.

"A-Asuka…"

"Mm hmm."

"What… What's going to happen to me when we get back to the Wunder?"

She opened her eyes back up and looked at him. His eyes were fixed on her and she recognized the fear within them. It was something she hadn't thought about yet. Her focus had been on them surviving and getting back she hadn't thought about the next step.

Misato not shown any emotion when Shinji had been taken from them. She had just ordered them to prepare to attack NERV with no mention of what to do with Shinji when found. WILLE would probably imprison him again and question him on what he knew. He might be dumped off at an outpost somewhere or Misato might want to keep him close by based on what he was capable of. It was hard to say.

As for Rei, she was not a part of the mission. She was a member of NERV and therefore an enemy. She would be seen as such yet if she co-operated she might be useful. She'd likely be imprisoned too.

Finally Asuka spoke, as honestly as she could but unable to bring her voice above a whisper.

"I don't know."

"I see." he turned away from her and looked across at the empty space that Rei occupied earlier.

"You'll both probably be imprisoned, maybe kept on board the Wunder. It depends on how much of a danger they deem you both to be. Based on your track record so far I'm going with very dangerous." She told him.

After a brief pause Asuka continued to speak, "If you co-operate you might be allowed some personal quarters eventually but I wouldn't count on it. You'll probably be deposited at an outpost and kept in quarantine there."

"I understand. So… I won't see you again?"

She frowned as he lay back down and closed his eyes. After all that his concern was not seeing her again? Why would he want to see her? Didn't he realize how much she hated him? She looked down at her hand resting on his stomach and sighed again.

"Look… when we get back I'll speak to Katsuragi alright. God knows why I'm doing this but I'll explain what happened. I'll explain the circumstances and see if you can stay on board but… and this is but, if you do anything to fuck it up I will ensure you won't get another chance."

He rolled back over onto his back.

"I… Thank you Asuka."

There was a pause for a moment as she just stared into the back of his head. She tried closing her eyes but every time she did she immediately reopened them just to look at him. She had focused so much effort over these years on hating the image of Shinji Ikari, planning out what she would do when he would return and picturing every punch and kick she would land to his body.

None of that had happened though. Aside from her outburst near to his cell she had not yelled at him half as much as she had planned to nor had she hit him like planned. She was instead lying next to him, her arm draped across him and seeking comfort from him when she slept. She didn't know who she hated more, him or herself for failing to carry out what she said she would.

They remained silent for a moment and she felt something across her hand. It was his hand slowly running his fingers across it before holding onto it.

"I… I'm really sorry about what happened to you Asuka. I wish… I wish I could make things right somehow."

Her fingers intertwined with his, "You can't."

She spoke the words softly, there was no hatred in them. There was no malice, just a simple stating of a fact. She had to get him to know that he wouldn't be able to make up for what had happened.

"I know that, I know I can't but… I can't just do nothing." His voice was raised as he spoke, almost pleading with her.

She shot back to him angrily. "Yes, yes you can! You don't get it do you? You… the way this world is, I know you didn't intend to do it, we all know that but you are to blame and it's because of how you acted on that day. We can't allow you to do anything Shinji. Half of those people on the Wunder grew up in this world, they were children when Third Impact occurred and the rest of us… we were…"

"I… I didn't mean to… I just wanted to save Rei and… I…" A loud sob escaped him as Asuka watched on.

"And when you came back you couldn't trust us, we tried to warn you and you just went against us. You nearly did it again Shinji…"

"But… you all… you never explain-"

He spoke through the sobs. Tears freely streaming down his face now. She studied him for a moment wondering if maybe she should stop but she kept going. It was time for him to hear this no matter how much it hurt him.

"They tried but before they got a chance to your bastard of a father attacked us and you blindly followed Rei without thinking. Did you not listen to a word anyone said to you? Did you not consider we might have had a good reason to keep you under quarantine like we did?"

"I… no… but you all…"

He trailed off. He knew that she was right, now that he knew the truth of what he had done and of what his father was done he couldn't blame them. It didn't make it any less painful to him.

"You think that we hated you? Of course we did, because of what you represented to them all and because of what you had done and because of what had happened before. The best thing for you to have done at that time was nothing, we told you that! You couldn't see it! Even when SEELEs boy told you to do nothing you continued!"

He offered no reply and she continued to berate him, "You're a brat and an idiot Shinji, you don't think! You just act! You think you can help but sometimes... you don't have to do anything to help! Sometimes just doing nothing is better than doing something. It isn't like we didn't have our reasons for not wanting you near... well anything."

She paused for a moment and wondered if maybe she had gone too far in berating him, "Look at me Shinji."

He turned away from her prompting her to prop herself up and grab his jaw and turn his head to face her. This time she commanded him.

"I said look at me Shinji Ikari."

He raised his eyes to look at her as she raised both her hands to his cheeks using her thumbs to wipe away the tears. Despite her words he could see no anger in her. For a time they just sat there staring into one another. Shinji not daring to move from her grasp and Asuka not letting go still wiping away each tear as they silently fell down his cheek.

Finally she spoke once again.

"I wasn't going to tell you this but you should probably know the truth. There were two attempts to retrieve you before this one. I was involved in both those attempts. That's why we called you BM-03. The first attempt was my first mission with WILLE. I volunteered for it. They were reluctant at first to put me back out there but Misato trusted me and she knew why I did what I did. If anyone was going to retrieve you it was going to be me. Certainly wasn't going to be Mari or your father's people. It was going to be me."

"W-What happened to them?"

Asuka cast her mind back to those two missions, to the things that they retrieved. She didn't want to think about it but she decided to be honest with Shinji.

"What we retrieved... wasn't you. It wasn't... anything, it was grotesque and it was dangerous. It tried to take your form but it..."

She turned away from a moment before looking back at him. His voice was trembling and she wondered just how much she should tell him. She knew how fragile he was and despite her wanting to tell him the truth she wasn't sure that she could tell him that she had been the one to kill the previous attempts.

"Asuka?"

"They just... weren't you alright and those attempts nearly cost us. That was another reason we were so wary of you. We didn't know if we were getting another failure that could kill us all or... the child who ended the world."

"It... really is me though isn't it?"

She nodded, "Yes, it really is you."

"H-How do you know?" He questioned her his voice full of fear after learning that what he was might not be him.

She sighed, "Please don't start, I can barely handle Rei's identity crisis. I don't need you doing this to me as well."

He laughed. "S-Sorry."

"I just know alright. When you rescued me that day I knew we had retrieved you. That's why I came down to the cell that day to confirm it."

"I thought you came down to punch me."

A grin crossed her lips, "Well that as well. I've been wanting to punch you for fourteen years and I wouldn't have nearly broke my hand punching out that glass if I wasn't sure it was you!"

"Do it." He sprang up suddenly.

"Huh?" She replied, confused by his request.

"Punch me, it's... what I deserve. I put you through so much. I... I didn't deserve to come back."

Shaking her head, "God you're an idiot. I'm not going to punch you Shinji, even if you beg me to. Besides you saw what I did to that glass, are you really sure you want me to punch you?"

Shinji nodded, "W-Why not? I deserve it, after everything I did. I shouldn't even be back here. I should have died instead of Kaworu. I should have vanished instead of Rei. I... should have..."

"Stop it!" She commanded and immediately he stopped talking. She continued to keep one of her hands held up caressing his cheek but dropped the other one to his hand.

"You came back and you're not going anywhere again. I don't know what you can do to be forgiven or to make up for what you have caused. I don't even know if you can be but if you want to do something, anything then wishing that you hadn't come back or that you were dead isn't going to accomplish that."

"I... just don't know what I can do!" He stammered out again.

"You don't understand do you, there is nothing you can do Shinji. We never had a plan for what would happen when we got you back. We didn't know how people would react or how we would react. At the moment all you can do is nothing, you sit where we put you. Follow the instructions of Akagi and Katsuragi and just stay put. It's as much for your safety as it is ours."

"M-My safety?"

"Of course, you saw the looks you got when you stepped onto that bridge didn't you? You said it yourself, they hate you. What makes you think one of them won't attack you and... No offense Shinji you're not exactly going to able to defend yourself are you?"

"I... guess."

"Like I said, I'll speak to Katsuragi and Akagi when we return. Katsuragi is more understanding then you think but she has to put on a front for her troops. If they see her show weakness they'll seize upon it. With what just happened it'll be tough but maybe we can arrange something for you to do at least. Maybe put you in the kitchen."

"I-I'd like that."

"I'm not making any promises though."

She took his hand and squeezed it gently contemplating what she was going to say next. The space behind her eyepatch itched, a common occurrence since she had lost her eye and when under stress. She looked away briefly to try to calm down.

The evening had been tough on Shinji, she knew what she was about to say wouldn't help but this was the best opportunity for it. She knew she wouldn't be able to do this back at the Wunder.

"Asuka are you alright?"

"Shinji... Just while I'm being honest about things here. Do you remember what you asked me when you first saw me again?"

Shinji slowly nodded.

"You asked me what had happened to my eye. By now you already know what caused it though don't you?"

He nodded again. He had given it some thought since returning. He had at first wondered if it had happened during the fourteen years he was away but her anger towards him when he had asked meant it could only be one thing, "The Unit 03 test… I…"

"Yes. You already know I was put into a coma after that. They managed to reconstruct my body but I was at risk of severe contamination, either from the Angel or from Eva itself. They managed to seal it away somehow but I lost my eye in the process and have to wear this eyepatch instead. I don't know if you can see but it's got a symbol on it. This is designed to keep the contamination localised and sealed away. In addition to the other damage Eva has done to my body I'm barely fucking human anymore." She spoke slowly and was deliberately looking away from Shinji as she did so.

She had never spoken to someone about this before. Not even Mari, the one person she could probably consider her closest friend on the Wunder. Not Katsuragi, the person who had kept Asuka alive for all those years.

She turned to look him in his eyes, "I still ask myself sometimes why you did nothing to help me on that day and why you chose to help Rei over me in the next Angel. Why you were content to do nothing while an Angel infected my body and then in the next battle you risked the entire world to save Rei. I could see it when it happened, I could see you in Unit 01 doing nothing."

Her voice snared at him as she leaned in closer. He didn't back off or avert his eyes.

"I… couldn't… I didn't want to hurt you. I couldn't fight you."

"You didn't even try though did you? You had no idea what that thing was doing to me! What sort of pain I was in. You just thought about yourself and your guilt if you had thrown a punch at Unit 03!" She kept her voice low but there was definite anger within her words.

She paused to gather her thoughts before continuing, "You know what the thing is though Shinji, I might have been able to forgive you for what happened with enough time. I kinda understand why you couldn't attack Unit 03 like you did and... The less said about your fathers' employment and halting of the Dummy Plug the better. If I had woken up and you were there and the others were there then maybe. I would have been angry for a time sure but I'm sure a week or two of you doing my bidding would have helped."

She gave a sad smile, "Except when I did wake up everything had changed. The world had been practically destroyed. It was worse than what we had seen of the Second Impact. What was left of an already fragile world nearly destroyed itself over the course of a year. Wars broke out, islands sank underwater and before long entire countries become desolate wastelands."

"When I woke up… the world I knew had gone Shinji and all I knew and all I had been told was that you were responsible and worst of all you had done it for Rei. You had tried to save her and both of you had vanished while I had to live in this fucking world. I couldn't just disappear or vanish."

Another pause from her, "WILLE was just starting up back then. I had missed a lot, the UN invasion of NERV, the truth about what NERV was and the Eva's. Mari tried to fill me in and they needed me. All I've known for fourteen years was who was responsible for starting this and fighting. I've… I've lost who I am Shinji and it's all your fault."

She sniffed and felt a tear roll down her cheek as she spoke. He reached up this his hand to wipe it away.

"I'm… I'm so sorry Asuka. I… I'm sorry."

"I wanted to hate you so much. I had to hate you, all I had to keep me going those fourteen years was how much I hated you and wanted to see you back so I could tell you that. I've been holding in fourteen years of feelings and emotions building and now…"

She trailed off unable to say anything else. It was too much for the two of them. Fourteen years of emotions were bubbling to the surface and she was unsure of how to handle them. She wanted to just keep it bottled up to pretend she still hated him but she couldn't. No matter how much she tried she couldn't truly hate him.

She was just like Misato, using it as a screen for their real pain, for their own failures. If they had acted differently back then it could have been averted, they were all as much to blame for Third Impact as Shinji was.

Finally he broke down again, tears streaming down his face, "I'm sorry Asuka…"

"I know you are."

There were no more words as she took her hands and wrapped them around him pulling him towards her. He rested his head on her chest sobbing every now and then as she delicately ran her hands through his hair. She felt his hands around her as she come to rest her cheek onto the top of his head and let a few more tears of her own fall.

She hushed him and softly whispered into his ear, "I know you're sorry Shinji."

Author's Notes:

Title of this song comes from one of the other main sources of inspiration or the story. Keep Talking is a track from the Pink Floyd album The Division Bell. The album itself is something of a concept album in which all the songs deal with themes of communication. Very fitting for Evangelion I feel.