Hey everyone! Please read this:

So this is Chapter 3 of my first fanfic. I am sorry it has taken me soooo long to update, I was running a little dry on inspiration and real life didn't help my situation. But before I begin, I would just like to say THANK YOU to everyone here who has taken the time to review my stories and give me suggestions/advice. And don't worry, I will fulfill all your suggestions!! I never expected my first "fanfiction" to get this big of a response, and I really owe it to all my friends around FF and JJB, as well as everyone I'm meeting here at . I hope that you stick with me and continue to review and give me advice, because I will try to only get better as chapters go on. So please enjoy.

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Since I have decided to do their whole honeymoon, I realized SM gave me a lot of space in the books to do my own thing. Considering they were there, what, 17 days or so... this can have a LOT of cool experiences for me to choose from. Yes, I realize that Edward tried to distract Bella by doing other events so she would be too exhausted to bring up sex LOL but there's also a lot of room for it that I feel is my duty to write out for the fans of this AMAZING couple!! So.. here is a "secret" honeymoon day: The dawning of the fact that Bella realizes she may have been selfish in bed, and what leads from this. In the begining, I tried to make sure I used a lot of thoughts... You know... This is kind of the things we think about as girls when we're alone. I wanted this one to be romantic but light hearted and I hope I did it justice!! PLEASE REVIEW!

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This is another smut, juicy lemon. I will try to keep it romantic though, for the most part. But it does include graphic nature.

Note - I'm going to go one chapter at a time, that way I can map out their vacation nights how I see it.

Disclaimer: I own nothing that is Twilight or Stephenie Meyer related. Though I wish I owned RPattz. I'll have to add him to my christmas list.

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Chapter 3. Letting Go Of My Inhibitions.

This morning, I woke up, stretched lazily, rolled over and felt the pillow beside me, and realized that Edward was not there. Frowning, I laid there still, waiting for my eyes to adjust to the daylight. I breathed in the sweet smell and listened to the sound of the sea and salt water coming from the bedroom window behind me. It was a nice day, I could feel it. The sunshine was all around the walls.

I sat up stiffly, scratching the hair on top of my messy bed-head, and yawned. How long have I been sleeping? Who knows anymore, it varies day by day. It was too silent around the room. I thought about calling for Edward, but decided it was best to get up, get some clothes on, brush my teeth, and make myself presentable before hand. As I wrapped the white sheet around my body, I stood up and looked around the bedroom floor, inspecting for any damage we could have caused. There was nothing, and for some stupid reason, this made me frown. Had I not done something right? Did I disappoint Edward and not give him his wants and needs the way he desired them? I realize that I have been a little bit fiesty at times, but who can blame me when they have a God-like creature naked in front of them? No one in there right mind that I know of. Regardless, I felt something off in the air. Something was definetly weird.

I gathered my toothpaste off the sink, applied it to my toothbrush, rinsed it off, and began brushing my teeth with one hand as I attempted to brush out the tangles in my unruly hair with my other. I couldn't seem to shake this uncomfortable feeling that something was very wrong. It was sunlight outside, so I knew Edward wouldn't have wandered off too far by himself, afraid that someone somewhere on a boat or something would happen to row by and see him. Yes, it's crazy to think of when you're on a private island, but I'm sure Edward would still be cautious. He's always prepared. Nothing surprises him... Well, except me, and that's not always a good thing.

I ran quickly to the bedroom door and opened it, peaking outside. No movement. Just silence. He was clearly not in the house. The feeling I have in the pit of my stomach told me he wasn't hurt or anything, which was good. However, it was telling me that it was me that did someting off. But what did I do last night to make him have to go away and think, or whatever he was doing? I played the events of last night over and over in my head, trying to make sense of them. Was I too rough? Too gentle? Did I say something really stupid in a moment of heat that scared the bejesus out of him? Did I bite him? I pondered and pondered and nothing would come to focus. But there must be something... some little thing that I done wrong. Edward didn't even leave a note for me, which is very unlike him to do. I frowned and headed back to the bathroom and ran the shower water.

More and more thoughts crossed my mind as I soaked my hair and body. As my hands ran through my hair, I started to think of Edward's movement. Sure, he was worried about hurting me which I can't seem to shake from him no matter how hard I tried, but that is becoming normal behavior for Edward. That couldn't be it though. He has too good of self-control to actually lose it on me. In fact, there has been a few moment these past couple nights where his beautiful crooked smile would come across his face during our time, and he would press his forehead to mine. The moments like that were my most favorite. It didn't matter if I was caught up in tears and completely overwhelmed, or if I was just in need of more of him... that feeling he could give me when he did that and looked me in the eye... it was irreplaceable. So, the sex part I was pretty sure was okay for now. Sure, I wasn't as flexible or as adventerous with positions as my thoughts are when I'm alone, but I am sure I will get to being more comfortable eventually.

So it had to be the foreplay. Hmm... Maybe I wasn't passionate enough when I was kissing him, or worse, too pationate and frightening. Maybe it was because I interrupted him playing the piano. Maybe it was because I was half naked on top of the piano while he was... Yes. But Edward seemed to like to do that to me. I never imagined that I would be comfortable enough to let anyone do that to me, let alone someone I felt was so perfect that I would only look more unperfect to him, especially in those type of postions. Plus, I couldn't deny the fact that it was utterly the most hottest and overwhelming feeling to cross my body when he did the things he did with his mouth to me. Words cannot even describe the hot and cold flashes your body goes through, the dirty words you have to bite your tongue over to not shout out loud, and the end result that is so sexy and provacative, especially when it is Edward Cullen that is doing it to you...

I rinsed my hair and lathered up my loofa. As I began to slowly run down my arm with it, it suddenly dawned on me what the problem was. "Holy shit!" I shouted outloud, dropping the loofa and bodywash bottle. I knew EXACTLY what the problem was. Here I was, being stubborn Bella. I was so caught up in everything going around with us in the heat of the moment, and the fact that an absolute angel was willing to make love to me while I was still human, that I didn't even realize what I had done wrong. I wasn't giving him what he needed. All the foreplay was mostly on me. Okay, more than mostly. Nine eight percent of it was on me. On my needs. On my wants. On my sexual appetite. On my desires.

I am an idiot. It is official.

Edward would never ever ask me to do anything for him like that. He was too much of a gentleman, too much of an amazing soul to be as stubborn as I have been these past two nights. Yes, I am sure he's had hot, typical, male fantasies of giving it to a girl in all these positions, and all the foreplay women could do to him. After all, vampire or not, he's said it himself. He's still a man. And I, as a woman -- as his woman -- wasn't giving him the same sort of gratitude that he has given me. But what could I do to make it right now?

Of course, I knew what I could do. But I didn't want to necesarily think about it, even if I was being selfish. It wasn't that I thought it was dispicable. I'm sure that Edward's body, every single centimeter of it, is perfect. That's not the problem. But I had no idea how to do it. It's not like I have tons of experience with this kind of thing. I laughed, picturing myself trying to attempt it on him. I knew I would choke, that was a given. But what if it got stuck there, or I poked myself in the face with it? Worse, what if I broke it? Can it be broken? I laughed some more, realizing my newfound dillema.

"What are you laughing at?"

I jumped at the sound of his voice, and then froze like a statue. I heard a laugh that could only be the voice of an angel and frowned. How long had he been in here? I stuck my head out of the shower door, and found him sitting on top of the bathroom sink, twirling an apple on his finger like a basketball. His hair was spiked and pefect. His eyes were a deep golden color, only available after a hunting trip. He was wearing a fitted black t-shirt, dark blue jeans, and black shoes. He was perfect.

"What were you laughing at?", he asked again.

"Oh, nothing much." I quickly stuck my head back inside and shut the shower door.

"I'm not buying it, my love."

"That's because there is nothing to be bought," I countered. Nothing besides the penis puzzle.

"I'm not buying that either."

I stuck my tongue out towards the water, thinking of his face before it. I giggled.

"I saw that."

I looked at him through the glass and slumped. "When did you get here?"

"A few moments ago."

"Where did you go?"

"To find us some breakfast."

I opened up the shower door again and looked at him, confused. There was no way I was eating what he ate. He laughed at me so hard that his head hit the mirror behind him. He sat the apple on his knee and grabbed a towel off of the towel warmer Carlisle included for Esme when he bought her this house. He threw it over his shoulders and leaned back against the mirror, scratching his head, tucking his bottom lip out.

"Don't hurt yourself," I giggled at his expense.

"It was worth it," he replied. "You should have seen your face. It looked like you imagined I had placed a nice, juicy, moutain lion on your plate next to candle light, waiting for you on the kitchen table."

I rolled my eyes for a moment, rinsing off my body. I cleared my throat. "Hey Edward?" I called, changing my tone.

"Yes, love?"

"You know, finding us both breakfast can be pretty exhausting. You probably got really, really, extremely dirty with your adventure. Do you think you would want to join me in here?" I crossed my fingers.

He exhaled loudly. "I would but I made you breakfast and it's waiting, and it would be a waste of nasty human food if we were to let it get cold."

"We have a microwave here." I closed my eyes, thinking of my previous thoughts. Of me being selfish in the nights past.

"Doesn't work good with pancakes."

I frowned, knowing I wasn't going to win this time. I turned off the water and rang out my hair with my hands. As I turned around to open the door, I jumped back, startled, realizing it was already open and he was standing there. He had a towel open with his hands, and was waiting for me, grin on face. I smiled and raised my arms so he could wrap it around my body. As he did, he pulled the ends of it to the front and then proceeded to pull me slowly towards him. I wrapped my arms around him even though I was wet, and pulled his face towards me to kiss him.

"Mmm," he sighed, kissing me longer. Tingles started to flow through my body and I fought to ignore them. He said no. I have to respect that. I am focused on his needs.

His tongue slipped through my lips as his fingers dug into the towel behind me, pulling me furthur against him. I moaned into his mouth, tugging on his hair. I so badly wanted to lift myself up off the floor and wrap my legs around his waist. After all, being in nothing but a towel was an easy excuse for easier access. No, I thought. It ain't about you, Bella.

I fought the evilest of temptation and moved back from his grip, sighing as I stepped. He tilted his head and pulled me and the towel back to him. I sighed and reached behind me, grabbed his hands, and unlocked them from my waist.

"What's wrong?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh. Nothing. I just... don't want to keep breakfast waiting any longer. Can't reheat pancakes well, you know."

His eyes followed me as I walked around him and grabbed my clothes, his arms still out like he was still holding me. I looked away, trying to focus on getting dressed.

"Oooh," he spoke behind me. "I like those panties."

I blushed as I slipped the lace white panties under the towel, and continued to dress. Why was he teasing me? He was making this really difficult.

Edward leaned against the back of the bathroom door, crossed his legs and placed his hands into his jean pockets. He began to stare at me and my legs as I continued to get dress. Just staring. Like the God that he was. I could tell he was starting to loosen up around me and the idea of sex -- as long as it was controlled -- and that made it even harder to resist him. I realized at this moment that I would never, ever get enough of him. An eternity wasn't even enough. Regardless, I needed to stay focused on the idea of him and his needs and desires, and he had told me "no" moments before. So there was no point in giving in. For now.

After getting fully dressed, I slipped on my flip flops and bent over to dry off my hair. I felt two hands wrap around my waist and looked between my legs to find him standing behind me. I felt the tips of his cold fingers rubbing across my t-shirt hem on my back. God, he was teasing me. Stupid, gorgeous vampire.

His needs, I thought at repeat in my head. His needs, his wants, his desires. His needs, his wants, his desires. As his hands slid under my shirt and up my spine, my thoughts faded to just his, his, his. No, no, no! I flipped back up and began to dry my hair that way, slowly stepping away from his grip. He caught the hint and stepped backwards again, leaning back against the door. Edward stood still as a statue, permanent smile on his face as he watched me blow dry my hair, comb it, put on foundation, and adjust my shirt. Then I turned around and smiled at him, waiting for him to move. He slowly stepped to the side and allowed me to open the door.

"You are a very stubborn girl, Isabella Cullen."

I smiled at him, thinking about my pact with myself. "Not at all. Just hungry." I walked to the kitchen.

Edward had a beautiful breakfast display waiting for me at the table. Pancakes, bacon, eggs, toast. He had an orange juice, a water, and a hot tea next to that. Silverware on one side of the dishes, as a gently folded napkin laid on the other side, with a tiny heart with the letters "E&B" that was written inside it with pen. I smiled at that touch. How cute.

"Do you like the flowers?" he asked, sitting across from me. "I came across them this morning and pondered whether they were good enough to place beside you. It was hard to choose, because I wanted to make sure they were just right." I looked up to find a beautiful display of orange, yellow, and pink exotic flowers. They were like a mixture of the most beautiful tulip and a rose. I couldn't figure out what they were, but I could tell they were rare.

I smiled at him. "I love them."

He smiled back.

"And you." I continued.

His smile grew larger.

"Good." he said.

I ate in silence for awhile, thinking of my task. How was I going to bring it up? Do I ask him if he wants it? Do I just tell him that I am willing to do it to him? Do I just do it when he isn't expecting it? What if I do it and he doesn't want me to? Would he laugh at me if I choked on it? Would he be able to give me CPR, knowing where my mouth just was? Or would he just make fun of me for the rest of my life? I sighed, growing hopeless. My thoughts were ridiculous, yes, but I couldn't shake them. I wanted to be perfect for him.

"You seem distracted, my love." He leaned forward above the table, resting his face on his knuckles. He tilted his head, staring into my eyes. He was hypnotizing me. I looked away.

"No, I just..." I paused. "I was just thinking about last night."

"Yeah?"

"Yes."

He smiled and lifted his hands, motioning me to continue. I swallowed down the last piece of bacon, trying to figure out what to say next.

"Well," I continued. "I was just wondering... am I... am I up to par with you?"

His eyes dug deeper into mine, and I could tell he was trying to read my thoughts. Thank God for my mental handicap. "What do you mean, Angel?"

"I mean exactly what I asked. Do I... do everything right? For you?"

He nodded and smiled that crooked smile that would knock me off my feet if I were standing. "You were amazing. Why do you ask?"

The words came out all at once. I couldn't stop them. "I just... I feel that I am being to selfish with you. Like it's mainly focused on me. Edward you are trying so hard to be gentle with me and trying not to damage anything in the process and not hurt me and not do anything wrong, and here I have been the whole time, being selfish with you. It isn't fair to you. And I'm sorry for that, I really am. But... But I am willing to try to make it better next time."

"Bella," he laughed, leaning back against his chair and throwing his hands behind his head. "You are completely absurd."

I threw my face in my hands to cover my eyes and shook my head. "Don't make fun of me. I'm serious!"

He laughed more. "I'm not trying to, it's just, as usual, I have no idea what you are referring to."

"YOU!" I shouted, throwing my hands in the air. "I'm referring to you. I'm being selfish with you."

He chuckled one more and then let out a huge sigh. "No you are not."

"Yes I am."

"Okay... Then humor me. How are you being selfish with me?"

I gulped down my entire glass of orange juice and leaned back, satisfied with my full belly. Wow I ate fast. Nervous habit.

"Well," I responded softly, after a few moments. "I just... I..."

"Spill it out, Bella. It's not like I'm going to come across this table and bite you. Well... not like that, anyway."

He winked at me.

I shook my head at him. "This is not the time to be teasing and dazzling me, Edward Cullen."

"I'm not trying to, Bella!" he laughed as he stretched out his body. "I'm just trying to get you to tell me what in God's name is eating at you. Was it something I did last night that was bothering you? Was it-"

I cut him off. "It has nothing to do with what you did to me. You did everything right. It's me, and what I am not doing to you."

He sat up now, resting his hands in his lap, puzzled look on his face. He was waiting for me to explain. I sighed and gave in.

"I just feel that I am not doing enough things for you. Sexually."

He bit his bottom lip and stared at me. "Like what?"

"Like... you know..."

I closed my mouth at tapped my mouth with my index finger, raising an expression, trying to tell him to take a hint. He stared at my motions for a few moments, confused. I watched his eyes go back and forth from my eyes to my finger to my lips, over and over again. He tilted his head at me. He was so gorgeous. And clueless.

"Oh," he responded after a few more minutes of silence. "Ohhhhh." He nodded, letting it sink in. Then he burst into laughter.

"And light dawns on marble head," I quoted, leaning back against my chair. He was laughing still.

"That's not funny!" he shouted, tossing a piece of his napkin towards me. I tossed it back at him.

He straightened up, then slowly leaned his hand across the table and placed it on mine. His cold touch was wonderful. "Bella. Angel. Love of my life," he began, rubbing my hand with his. "You don't need to worry yourself with the technicalities. We have a long time ahead of us, so there is no need to get upset over tiny things. Everything is okay. I am so happy with you. Look at my face!" He was smiling the whole time, I couldn't deny that. But still.

"Besides," he continued. "I love you. You are doing nothing wrong. - "

"But I could be doing more." I finished, pulling my hand away slowly. I stood up and took my dishes with me to the sink. I washed them off, sigh on my face. I was being so stupid. What the hell is wrong with me? I felt his hands slid under my arms, down my ribs, around my waist, and felt his fingers lock themselves there. He stood behind me and leaned forward to rest his chin on my left shoulder, swaying with me side to side. He began to hum my lullaby softly into my ear. A shiver rushed through my body. I placed the dishes into the rack, trying not to smile. That would be selfish of me too. I tried to move away from him but he gripped tighter.

"You are not going anywhere." he stated pointly, continuing to sway. "You are staying right here with me. Forever. That was the deal."

I shook my head and tried to unlock his arms but he wouldn't budge.

"You are mine," he growled playfully in my ear. I felt my knees begin to cave in and that made me both more and less frustrated with the situation. More frustated because I wanted so badly to give him the sensations and feelings that he gives me on a daily basis anymore, and less frustrated because... well, he was giving me those sensations right now. I felt his cold, tender, soft lips edge down the side of my neck and then stop to plant a soft kiss by my shoulder. I closed my eyes, feeling him grip tighter to my body. He swayed side to side, chin back on my shoulder, humming. I closed my eyes, leaning my head back towards him, enjoying the sensation. I ran my fingers down the length of his arms, allowing my body to sway easier with him now.

"Do you know what we need?" he whispered, voice as velvet as can be. "Some music. I have just the item to do the trick."

He released his grip and ran into the living room, turning the radio on. He turned around and took a cd case out of his black carry on bag that was sitting next to the couch. After he put it in and adjusted the volume, he turned to smile at me, lifting his hand.

"Come here, my beautiful."

"Why?" I hesitated, twisting my right foot onto my toes.

"Because I asked you to. Please?" he smiled.

I gave in and walked over to him slowly. He was too irresistable. The music surprised me. I expected to hear something classic and older, like usual. Instead, it was a slower song, but definetly more recent. It had a beautiful piano introduction, followed by a soft, rusky, beautiful male voice. No drums to compliate it. Just beauty.

"What is this?" I asked, taking his hand with mine. He wrapped his arms around me once more, pulling my body all the way towards him. I knew he was going to start dancing, but it felt really nice, so I gave in.

"I borrowed it from Jasper. The singers name is Robin Thicke and the song is entitled 'Angels'. I immediately thought about you and I wanted to share it with you. Do you like it?"

I grabbed his arms and tightened them around me, wrapping my arms around his waist. I rested my head under his chin, against his chest. The lyrics were so beautiful, I could feel myself drifting away, with my love. The music was so soft. Romantic, I thought. A tad bit bluesy, but not much. A classic type of love song.

He began to hum slowly, tightening his grip. Then he began to sing along with the music, his voice melting my heartstrings.

"I don't know how I ever got by without you," he sang softly above me, killing me softly, easing my tension away. He began caressing the small of my back with his fingertips. "There's nothing like the truth, when you've got nothing left to lose... and every night I thank the universe... that I found you... Angel... my angel..." He begain to hum again, moving our bodies as one.

This was almost better than sex. Better than anything. I think that I am beginning to really enjoy this whole dancing thing. Especially the slow dances where I get to be wrapped up in his arms. Like this. I could honestly stay like this forever.

I slowly looked up at him, locking his angelic eyes with mine. This song was quite perfect for him, I realized. He smiled at me, and placed his forehead to mine, continuing to sing so gently.

"And if we all explode..." he sung softly, slowly, staring into my eyes. "You see, we would never know... But I just hope the pieces of my soul reach out to you, to find my angel."

As he began to hum more, he pulled me to him closer and buried his face into my neck. I breathed slowly, shaking, closing my eyes. I swayed with him for a few moments, thanking everything and everyone I could think of that he was here in my life.

The music began to pick up a little bit more bluesier now, but still kept the beautiful piano and soft momento.

As the music was coming to the end, I sighed and pulled his face back. Another soft intro was begining to play now. He kissed me slowly but passionately, our bodies getting lost into the soft, moving tempo of the music. I stood on my tippy toes, pushing myself higher, wanting to get more lost in him. Our kissing became stronger and stronger with each "hum" of the singer, and our tongues finally met. This whole scene was slowly driving me insane. I don't know how he always manages to do it, but Edward has dazzled me once again, just by his mere romantic, vampire presence.

Our mouths were firmly intertwined now and I felt myself moving backwards, against the brick wall beside the fireplace. He pinned my body with his, lowering himself down to kiss my left cheek and down to my neck. He placed his hand above my heart, feeling my heartbeat speed up. I swallowed hard and I felt him smile against my neck. This shot shivers through my entire body. I began to tremble as thoughts of me throwing my legs around him crept up into my head. Don't be selfish, don't be selfish.

I heard him inhale as he ran his face along my neck, up my ear, resting there. He was smelling me. I was wanting him. Badly. Don't be selfish, don't be selfish.

The music became intoxicating as he began to feverishly kiss my mouth. The music was pulling us more towards it. I pulled my face backwards, reluctantly, and ran my fingers down his black t-shirt and rippled abs. I stopped at his belt and looked up at his face. My fingers trailed across his stomach and belt for a moment as my smile met his. I tugged on the belt, pulling the pin from the hole, seperating the buckle. I could feel my desire for him drawing closer by the milisecond. Keeping my eyes locked on him, I bit my lip. He licked his. I unbuttoned his jeans, trying to remain calm. It was my turn to give him sensations, and I knew it. I wanted to.

I unzipped his jeans and leaned my face in closer to tease him. Everytime he slowly leaned in to kiss me, I leaned a little bit backwards. When he stood straight, I leaned forward. I began to run my fingers underneath his shirt, up and own his rock hard stomach. I smiled at him as he continued to try to kiss me. This music was really making him even more sexy. I ran my hands behind him, along his back, then back around, down his stomach, and finally rested towards his jeans once more. I ran my hands underneath the inside of his jeans and across the fabric underneath. I felt his body respond almost instantly.

"May I?" I whispered, breathlessly, teasing him.

He nodded, lips parted, keeping his eyes to mine. I began to rub the length of him through his briefs, feeling him press closer and closer to me now. Thank God that all the blinds were shut in this room and that the door was locked. I don't want anyone to interrupt this. The look on his face was priceless. Oh yes, I was enjoying myself.

I tucked my right hand inside the fabric now and down the length of him I watched as his eyes closed now, slowly. My heartbeat kicked into high gear and I was starting to lose my breath. I gripped a bit harder and freed him from the thin fabric, sliding his jeans down his backside a little with my free hand. He stepped his right leg between my legs and his left leg to the other side of them. He closed his eyes tighter as my hand motion sped up. His lips stayed parted. I began to use both my hands for a few moments and he groaned lightly. Shivers shot through me again, hitting the soft spots.

"Look at me, Edward." I demanded, gently of course. His head straightened up and his eyes locked with mine. I made sure to give him the most evil smile I could muster as I worked my left hand still. I brought my right hand up to my mouth, licking along my palm and fingers. He groaned louder now. Then, keeping my eyes on him, I brought it back down to his body, making fire meet ice again. As I began to speed up my motions with my right hand, I raised my left hand and did the same thing. As I licked it, I kept my eyes on his. He allowed a smile to escape the side of his mouth, panting.

Continuing to rub, I felt him grow as hard as can be against me. I loved how his body was responding to me, how his face was begining to look. Giving pleasure was almost as good as receiving pleasure, I realized. Maybe it was an even share. As his eyes rolled into the back of his head, I stopped my hands. His head popped up fast, and he locked his eyes with mine. I smiled at him and began again. Harder. A few moments later, his eyes shut again. I stopped. Edward groaned and opened his eyes. I began again. His eyes started to flutter shut, but he left them open. He knew I was returning what he did to me the other night.

And then he surprised me.

He leaned forward towards me, gripping my face firmly with his hands, pressing his forehead to mine. He locked my eyes into his.

"Is this where you want me?" he asked ever-so-sexy, drowning me with his gorgeous golden eyes. I knew he didn't have to inhale and exhale like I did, but the fact that I was making him, plus the way he was looking at me, was making me completely overwhelmed. My lips parted as I caressed the length of him, changing my motions gradually. He continued to keep his eyes open and on mine, but I felt him lick his lips underneath mine. His fingers gripped my his tight now, his cold touch surprising me. I was definetly turning him on, and he was definetly returning the gesture.

I shoved my face towards him for a moment, unable to resist his lips. His tongue found mine in under one second, and I almost got too caught up in his kiss to continue to move my hands. I backed up and let go with my hands. He tilted his head, looking down to me. I smiled and pushed him backwards. He began to speak but I shook my head, pressing my fingertips to his rock hard chest. I pushed backwards again. He slowly walked backwards until the back of his legs hit the arm of the couch. I pushed him back harder, his body falling onto the couch. I grabbed his jeans by his thighs and tugged them down a bit. Then I climbed over the arm and his body, straddling his knees.

As I began to work my hands again, I could tell he was shocked by the look in his eyes, but he was trying to play it off cool. He put a couple pillows under his head, getting comfortable, watching me work. I knew that if my seduction was going to continue, I was going to have to go to drastic measures. I scooted by body down lower and leaned forward, towards his stomach. His mouth dropped open as he felt my hot breath come closer to his body.

"Bellaaaa," he hesitated, breathlessly, gripping the couch seat underneath him.

I looked up at him, mouth an inch away from his lower body, and licked my lips. "What?" I responded gently, continuing to stroke him, to tease him. "Do you not want me to?"

He closed his eyes for a moment, licking his lips. He was trying to regain his composure on his face. "No, no," he said at last, voice breaking. "I most definetly want you to, it's just that... I don't know how good my self control is, and I don't think we should be testing my limits while you're still... fragile."

I smiled at him and let go of my inhibitions. Keeping my eyes on his, I licked the tip of him. His eyes shut. It wasn't bad at all, I thought. So far!

Becoming excited, opened my mouth wide and drew him into it. His cold, smooth body tensed up hard underneath me and his eyes rolled back into his head. I allowed it. I didn't know if I wanted him to watch me or not, just in case I messed up. I was trying so hard to focus on not biting him or breaking it.

I lowered my mouth onto him now, as far as I could go. Then my gag reflex kicked in. I backed off for a second, trying to shake off my fear. Relaxing my throat, I began again. I continued to use my hands with my mouth, making sure every inch of him was covered in warmth at some point. His body continued to flex then loosen, flex then loosen. I began to speed up my pace now as moments passed. Changing it up a bit, I moved my hands opposite my mouth, giving him a different kind of effect. Only when I went down too far with my mouth was it uncomfortable.

"Breathe out with your mouth when you go down," he moaned. I removed my mouth and looked up at him to see that he was watching me. I continued to move my hands.

"Well," he said, flustered, embarassed. "Emmett told me that if a girl... if you... breathed in... with your mouth while you're doing th-that, then it'll ease the gag reflex."

I nodded and began again. This time, as I breathed out, I realized it was opening my throat wider. I could go down furthur. And by the sound of his moans, the rise of his body, and the lowering of his feet, I was doing my job right. After a few moments, I began to pick up my pace again, bringing him closer and closer.

Everytime I felt that he was closer to me giving him an orgasm, I slowed down, calming him down. Then I began again. I felt my body respond to his underneath my own jeans. I was definetly turned on. Hearing this angel's noises was definetly helping. I wanted to bring him sooo close but I didn't want to bring him all the way. I changed rhythms, tightened my lips and loosened them, used tongue and no tongue. A little bit of teeth action, but nothing strong at all. I knew that much was bad news. As I was moving, I kept my ears focused on the sexy sounds he was making. I used to never imagine I'd do this, but listening to his body respond to what I was doing made me have absolutely no regrets. I kind of liked it, honestly, as I began to figure out techniques he liked and what to do to make sure I was not going to choke. But I was still paranoid I was going to break it.

Minutes and seconds passed by and feeling his body react was almost too much. I almost got too carried away and took him all the way, but I forced myself to stop. He swallowed hard, eyes beginning to glaze, and he licked his lips.

"Mmm," he sighed, adjusting his body on the couch. "Wow."

I smiled and climbed off, running to get a drink of water. It wasn't that it was nasty tasting, of course, but my mouth was definetly dry now. He called for me and I ran back. He stayed on the couch and raised up his arms for me to climb back over him. I grabbed his shoulders and straddled him. Then I bent down to kiss him, but paused. I wasn't for sure if he'd want to do that or not. But he did, thankfully, and by the response of his mouth, I could tell I did my job really well.

I felt his cold fingers slide up the back of my shirt and undo my bra. I smiled at him. He returned the smile. His hand gave me serious cold chills as he slid them back down my back. Then, gripping my shirt, he pulled it off with my bra in one smooth motion. Normally, I would be to embarassed to sit above him exposed. But I wasn't. I was too excited.

I lifted his shirt to the top of his chest, kissing across it and down his stomach. His bare chest had a nice little flush to it, nothing serious obviously, but enough to catch my eye. Edward ran his fingers through my hair, obviously enjoying it. I could feel the length of him press against my jeans, and it sent trembles through my body. I wanted him so freaking badly.

I sat up on my knees, crouching over him, but before I could get to my jeans, he already had them unbuttoned and unzipped. I smiled and stood up for a moment, sliding them down my legs and leaving them on the floor. I straddled him again and his beautiful, soft hands found those white panties that he liked so much earlier. His right hand ran up my back as his left hand slid between my legs, rubbing my body through the fabric. His touch immediately brought a response to my body, and I threw my head back, losing my breath. Wow, how did he do that?

He continued to rub and I knew my body was responding against the fabric. I could feel my body becoming more turned on and I knew he could feel it too. He brushed my hair off my back with his left hand, bringing it to the right side of my face. I leaned down to kiss him and he let me. His left hand ran down to my breasts, taking turns caressing them. I moaned against his mouth as his hands were working multiple parts of my body. My breath became more shallow as my body began to rock above him, up and down, side to side. His mouth crushed mine as his fingers slid inside the side of my panties, touching my most intimate place. My tongue found his in a second, and I knew I was becomming more vulnerable. His left hand slid under my stomach and raised me above him, his right hand continuing to work his magic.

He slid down my panties with his left hand and I moved my legs to get through them. There was no way in hell I was going to stand up to remove his hand from me, no matter how selfish that sounded. I didn't care. I did my part. Now it was our turn together. I caressed him beneath me as he caressed me, and he sucked in a large gasp of air. I licked my hand and placed it back against him, fire to ice mixture. It was weird that it wasn't weird that I was compeltely naked at this point, and he was pretty much fully dressed still -- besides his jeans lowered down his body and his shirt to his chest. I didn't mind. I took the tip of him and began to rub it against my wet entrance. He slid his thumb upwards, focusing on just the top, most sensitive part of my heat. That was all it took. I began to lower myself onto him, relaxing my body to his.

His eyes popped open again, watching the action. I saw him grip onto the left side of the couch cushion and knew he was trying to remain calm. I don't know where my shyness was, but it wasn't here at this very moment. I was too overwhelmed, too turned on by him. I spread my legs a little bit, letting him take in just a tiny bit more of the view. He moaned, caressing my leg with his left hand. Keeping a tight grip onto the couch with my right hand, I balanced myself above him, moving up and down along his length. His right hand continued to work its magic against my heat though, causing my body to react with his. I tightened my pc muscles and he moaned, causing me to return the sound.

He sat up quickly, grabbing my butt with both his firm, cold hands. I threw my hands on his shoulders, maintaing eye contact. He lifted my body with his just his bare hands. My knees locked against his rib cage.

As he guided my body the way he wanted to with his hands, I felt myself slowly beginning to break apart, piece by piece. I could feel him inside of me stronger now, and he was hitting a spot I wasn't aware even existed. My body began to shake and I closed my eyes, getting lost into the moment. It was as if the most sensitive part on the outside of my body had replicated itself and now there was one on the inside. I began to help him move me up and down now, getting more lost in him. I threw my arms passionately around his neck now, grinding against him harder. His lips parted wide and his eyes locked on mine, breathlessly. Everytime I moaned, he responded by gripping tighter.

Moments passed and we both became unaware of any inhibitions that were bothering us. I began to moan his name in his ear and he was tugging gently on my hair and my body, and I knew he was losing all control, for the most part. I felt his body start to tremble underneith me and I gripped tighter to his body. His hand met my most sensitive spot as I was rocking hard against him, and that was all it took. My body released the biggest orgasm I had had to date and I moaned so loudly that I was thankful there were no neighbors around us. He gripped tighter to me now, moving his body with my trembles, giving me the full effect.

I collapsed onto him hard after a few more seconds, and he fell backwards against the couch pillows. My heartbeat pounded against his chest. I lay there breathlessly now, trying to regain my thougths. Nothing was quite making sense at the moment.

I didn't care.

I smiled. I did it though! I thought. Not only did I overcome my fear of pleasuring him how he wanted, but I let all my inhibitions drop away and gave myself freely to him. It was so nice to see his face react to my motions. To see him get lost in me. Everything was so worth it. Now it didn't matter if I was nervous. I wasn't going to let my emotions take control of me like that anymore. I loved being able to be free with him. I was enjoying myself.

"What are you thinking?" Edward asked a few moments later, as we were getting dressed.

"I know you're going to think this is silly, but I was just wondering... C-"

He cut me off. "Yes that was amazing."

I smiled and straightened up my shirt and hair. Then I threw my arms around him. "Thanks!" I replied, kissing his lips. "But... that's not what I was going to ask. I was wondering... is it possible to break a penis?"

He laughed. "Not at all. There's no bone in it."

I smiled evily at him. "Boy... are you going to be in trouble by the end of all of this."

--

So there we go! I hope you enjoyed the light hearted banter. I tried to be more intune with Bella's worrysome character and her thoughts, as well as normal girl concerns. And if you get a chance, download that song that EC was singing. It's so beautiful and inspiring. Plus the extend vs is 8 minutes long.. :D

Now I may continue w/this day in the next chapter... let me know what you think.

I hope it wasn't too painful for you!! Please, please, PLEASE review and let me know what you think! Let me know what you liked about it, and if there is something you hated, let me know that too so I can do better. And don't hesitate to make more suggestions. And yes, there will be more shower scenes as well! ;) Thanks for reading! A.S.