Here's your chapter Coleys17! enjoy and do let me know!
John didn't really remember when it started. But he guessed everybody in their lives feel this way at some point of the time. Maybe for not as long as John did, but at least sometimes.
John felt lonely.
Walking down the street from work John played out his life and relationships in his mind. He was not the most popular but certainly not unpopular in school and medical school. He was friendly, cheerful, companionable and made friends easily. He was in the rugby team. He always had friends. He made many friends throughout his life and retained most of them. There were so many people who once came close to him would remember him always. Patients, classmates, people from the clubs, army. He was always there for everyone, always.
But somehow he had never managed to find that one person who would be more than a friend to him. Not in school, med-school, army. In army he had formed friendships and bonds with people who would die for him but such was the intensity of bonds formed in such circumstances where you don't know which of them would be lying dead next to you in a matter of time. But nothing more than that.
Love had somehow always eluded him. To be truthful he was a bit shy, maybe a bit too shy in his approach towards relationships. He was understanding but quiet, he was romantic but embarrassed about being openly so, he was caring but in a way that seemed a bit mother hen like to many, he was passionate but closeted. Somewhere deep inside he was afraid of letting anyone in. Afraid once broken he wouldn't be able to collect the pieces again. His emotions ran deep, they were not superfluous, not showy. But sadly no one ever bothered to delve deep enough to find out what treasures lay buried beneath the sea. He was a bit too conscious about his sexuality also.
After a time he had started to realize that friends weren't enough. There was Harry but then again here was a void which neither friends nor family could fulfill. Something was missing from his life and he became acutely aware of it when Harry found Clara. He was happy for them, very happy for his loving, caring, over protective, sentimental sister. But there were so many times when they would go out together and John would watch the anticipation and excitement with a bit of sadness, they would always be together when invited, the knowing glances, the loving gaze, the stolen touches. Most of the time John would notice with an amused smile. It was an open secret between the three. He was always a part. But there were times when he was left out. He didn't mind. It was obvious.
But he longed.
He still longed. Some days he would just tell himself that maybe it wasn't meant to be, that he was just a retired army doctor with a bad shoulder and a psychosomatic limp, that he was a hermit, he was old fashioned and boring. But there were days when he would find himself pining to find someone who would wake him up in the morning, with whom he could share his deepest feelings with, who with just a touch of a hand or a loving glance make him easy. Someone he could sit at the park with, watching kids play and planning the future. He wouldn't mind if he was adventurous himself, John would participate up to his limit and never deny him anything, in return he would just have to understand John and let him take his time to open up. Sometimes John thought what he wanted was so regular, it was a mystery why he didn't bump into someone like that, but on other days he would figure that what he wanted, this contrast was rare and special and it was undeniably difficult to find someone like that. So he waited.
And waited.
John's reverie broke when he found himself at the crossing. Just as he reached the light turned green. Before he could let out an exasperated huff a man from across the street walked straight into the rolling traffic and was within seconds hit by a truck.
John drew in a sharp breath as the scene unfolded. But he was too well trained to be standing there stunned. He called for an ambulance reaching for the figure through the traffic and gathering of people surrounding him.
A tall figure in a long coat lay in a pool of blood face down. John reached him saying he was a doctor and the crowd made space for him. He crouched down beside the body.
The man was in his early thirties, curly rich brown hair, sharp features and extremely pale skin. John took a bloodied hand in his.
He was still alive.