Part Two

This is the part where I shove a disclaimer in your face reminding you that I am but a lame liberal arts college student and not a licensed medical professional. The following is probably about 99.8% inaccurate and purely for fictional purposes.

It was 1 a.m and Sam and Bobby had been sitting in the E.R waiting room for three hours now. Sam tried sitting down but ended up pacing across the sparse room over and over again until some equally jittery lady had yelled at him to sit down.

Bobby had to intervene before Sam pounded the poor lady's face in, and dragged him back over to two connected chairs while Sam glared at the woman. He kept rubbing his hands together, needing to be in constant motion or he might go crazy.

After Dean had dove in after their sister the night had just gotten worse. Sam felt all of the past few hours flashing through his chaotic mind and tried to calm down.

-4 hours prior-

Sam sat in the backseat with his icicle of a sister gripped to his own warm body. It was a shock of a temperature difference but he would let go of her the day Hell froze over. He grimaced at that thought. Froze. Great Sam.

The front doors opened and Bobby half threw and half dragged Dean into the front seat, and directed one of the heating vents at his neck. Dean stiffly wiggled out of Bobby's hands and tried his best to turn and look to the backseat. He and Sam made eye contact as Sam continued to vigorously rub his sister's shaking back.

Dean couldn't turn his head to the side so settled with yelling toward the roof of the car.

"S-s-sammy, how is she? Is she still b-breathing?"

"Yeah, yeah she still is," Sam trailed off as he tried to angle her head so he could see her face, "Ror, Jesus kid. What were you thinking?" He let his right hand continue resting on her icy cheek. His teeth were chattering from the cold and the fear that was finally sinking into him. He still could not completely wrap his head around the idea that his sister tried to kill herself...it had to be from her fever. She was delusional, there's no way she would have set out with an intent that horrible.

Bobby was finally in his seat, and was carefully pulling the truck back to the service road they had initially come down on. He glanced back a few times.

"She's not gonna get out of this easy. My guess is she'll have some serious frostbite. And don't let go of her Sam or there'll be hypothermia on top of that."

"Bobby," Dean started irritably, "she hit her head on the ice, we've got more to worry about than just her being cold. Just get her to the hospital." Dean felt himself almost glaring at Bobby who's eye twitched but he turned his attention back to the road. He had known these kids long enough to understand that his opinion was worth zilch when it came to the safety of one of them. He gingerly glanced sideways at Dean, as they pulled onto the main road, and he saw the eldest boy shaking.

"Ace if you don't get warm you can't help her."

Dean frowned and used the blanket Bobby handed him to dry off as best he could, but he honestly hadn't even noticed if he was cold or not, he was too in shock over what had just happened.

"I should have helped her before all this and now look at her," Dean started angrily, "none of this would have happened if I had taken care of her! Fuck!" He kicked the underside of the dash and then pounded a fist against the window.

"It's too late to start feeling guilty Dean," Bobby said annoyed, "and don't take it out on my truck. We'll get her to the hospital and then it's out of our hands. You aren't helping her by having a hulk out."

Dean felt himself breathing heavily through his nose. His head was pounding and he needed to have his sister with him. Not being able to at least touch her arm and know she was still there was freaking him out.

"Uhh...Dean?" Sam's panicked voice came to the front of the car. Dean whipped around, well whipped as fast as a frozen limbed person could, and looked at his younger siblings.

"What?" Dean practically yelled, "What happened? What's wrong?"

Sam stared at him, "She stopped shivering. What does that mean? Is that good?"

Dean blinked and was interrupted by Bobby who tiredly announced, "No that means her hypothermia is getting worse, her body isn't able to shake and try and keep her warm anymore. Do whatever you can Sam, we have two miles left til the hospital."

Sam's eyes couldn't get any wider as he began rubbing the warm clothes against his sister's dying skin. Dean had had enough in the front seat and began clambering into the back, almost kicking Bobby in the face.

"Goddamnit, Dean! Stay put or you're gonna make me crash! And then what?" Roared Bobby as Dean slid into the empty space in the back. The oldest Winchester ignored Bobby and began rubbing Caroline's frozen feet as fast as his own numb hands could. He and Sam made a nervous and prolonged eye contact until Dean looked away. That only worsened Sam's nerves, since he could now see just how nervous Dean was.

Dean was his big brother and he was infallible. And that look that had just passed over his face was clear as day to read. Sammy, I don't know how to fix her, and I think we might actually lose her.

Twice in one night now, Dean had fell off the big brother ladder, and left Sam to step up. Their dad's death had really taken a toll on him and Sam felt guilty about giving Dean so much shit about the way he'd been acting the past week. He swallowed hard and looked sadly at his big brother.

"Dean, I-I'm sorry about what I said earlier...about you not caring...I was way out of line-" he hung his head as he whispered until his brother interrupted.

"Sammy, stop. You don't have any reason to apologize, I've been a piece of shit this week. The only thing you should be sorry for is not kicking me in the ass sooner. Maybe then...none of...this," he gestured with his head at their unresponsive lump of a sister, "would have happened."

Sam blinked hard. "She's...she's gonna be alright Dean. She's gonna be alright." Neither brother was sure if Sam had just made a statement or asked a question, but Dean nodded anyway, "Sure she is. Kid's been through worse," he was trying his best not to choke on a sob as he brushed his hand through her hair, "she's been through worse."

Yeah but this is so different than those other times, Dean kept thinking. Sure she's been pummeled, kicked, thrown out windows, set on fire, and who knows what else, but it was always in a hunt. Never a self inflicted wound. How did it get this bad? How did I let it get this bad? His mind was racing faster and faster as he tried to think of any clues that this had been a long standing problem. She's the happy one, the smiling one, the calm one. More times than I can remember, I came home drunk and a mess and the one thing I wanted more than anything in the world was to get a hug from Caroline and for her to talk me to sleep. Why wasn't I there to give her hugs and talk her to sleep this week? I'm a fucking selfish prick.

Suddenly he remembered nights over the past few months, instances he had pushed aside as weird coincidences. Several times he had woken up in the middle of the night, thinking he heard whimpers coming from the motel room but couldn't place the source. Then the next morning Caroline had had bloodshot and puffy eyes. But idiot Dean had presumed she was tired or allergic to something.

Tears were streaming down his face as he continued rubbing his sister's feet. Then the car lurched to a stop.

"Here." Declared Bobby from the front, right before he tore out of his truck and into the ER. Before the boys knew it, there were several EMT's opening the doors and helping Dean out. As he tried to go get his sister he found himself being shoved onto a stretcher and several arms pulling blankets and a breathing mask over his face.

Sam felt his chest clench up at the chaotic scene unfolding in front of him. Dean was fighting against the EMT's and his limbs were flinging around like a madman. He heard his older brother screaming through the breathing mask but couldn't make out the words. Then he felt the weight in his arms being lifted as his sister was removed from his arms. He realized he didn't have most of his clothes on, great, and quickly dressed before exiting the truck.

Caroline lay motionless on her stretcher as she was poked and prodded with various instruments.

"Let me the hell off of this! Help my sister not me!" Dean's yelling was getting louder and Sam saw in the corner of his eye, Bobby remove his hat to dab at the sweat accumulating under it.

"She's going into cardiac arrest," the boys heard an EMT yell, "get her in now!"

Several medical personal dragged the stretcher in, leaving two with Dean who slowly started to roll him in.

"Rory!" screamed Dean, trying his best to sit up and see, "Caroline!"

Sam seemed to be in shock again and walked silently next to his brother, putting his hand on Dean's. Dean subconsciously grabbed onto Sam's forearm as he tried desperately to get answers.

"What happened? Where are they taking her? Where are they taking our sister?"

The female EMT put her hand on his shoulder as they walked the stretcher down a long hallway to a small room behind a curtain.

"Sir please calm down, we need to check you for hypothermia and any complications. We need to keep your pulse down."

"Keep my pulse down are you fucking crazy?" Dean yelled again, trying to yank the breathing mask off for the umpteenth time, "Someone said my little sister is going into cardiac arrest!" He started trying to kick the blanket off again, and the EMT's looked more than exhausted.

"Sir if you don't calm down we will have to sedate you," one said. Sam looked at them dead in the eyes.

"Do it."

The female EMT blinked, "Beg pardon?"

Sam sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, "Do it, he's only going to get worse."

Dean stopped his fighting and looked at Sam with an emotion worse than 'hurt' or 'betrayed'. "What?"

"They should sedate you Dean, you're acting like a lunatic."

"I don't need to be sedated Sam." Dean was trying his best to sound authoritative but it came out more like a scolded child. He slowly took deep breaths, "I'm fine. Just do what you have to and then let me go see my sister."

A nurse came in and began hooking Dean up to various monitors as well as an IV. Bobby trudged in, very red faced, after signing the two Winchesters in. He looked at Dean, who had been put in a hospital gown and covered up to his neck in warmed blankets. The boy's face was a sickly pale with horrible purple bags under his eyes, a quick look at Sam confirmed that he was not doing much better himself.

Bobby pulled a chair next to Sam, and before sitting down whispered quickly in his ear, "Go look for her." Sam nodded and left the curtained room before Bobby even finished sitting down.

"Where's he going? Sam? Sammy!" Dean started calling after him until Bobby interrupted.

"Dean boy you need to calm down."

"Calm down Bobby? I can't calm down until I see my sister and see that she's fine. Tell me to 'calm down'..."

"There's nothing you can do for her by causing a racket down in the ER."

"I need to see her Bobby."

"She's not going anywhere, Ace."

"I can't stay here any longer-"

"Just let them finish checking you, you're not missing anythin-"

"What if I am?" Dean finally sobbed out, tears escaping, "What if I am missing something? What if she dies? What if she dies and I'm not there with her? What if she wakes up and can't find me? Wha-what if-" he couldn't control his hyperventilating sobs any more and covered his face with his calloused hands. Bobby didn't know what to say. Dean's heart monitor beeped faster as his pulse sped up.

"The "perfect soldier Dean Winchester' can't take much more of this," cried Dean, "he can only pretend for his family for so long and guess what? Apparently this whole family is just a bunch of pretenders. Caroline's miserable, she's going crazy and she has been for years. And I've known, and Dad knew and no one did anything about it-"

"Dean calm down, what are you talking about?"

"Rory, she's kept up a good act her whole life but did we seriously think it could be so real? Growing up like she did, it's a miracle she's as normal as she is. The stuff she's seen, the stuff I've let my baby sister see...I'm so sorry."

"Dean...Dean Winchester, look at me," Bobby said sternly, "I guess no one's ever told you this, even your Daddy rest his soul, but you are one hell of a good brother. Don't you realize that? I can't imagine anyone else doing the things you do for your brother and sister. You raised them practically single handedly, into two outstanding people. Don't you see the way they look at you? As long as I've known you three I've seen the way Carrie looks at you with those big eyes, taking in every single thing you do, wanting to do it too. Sam and Carrie love you, and if I have to tell you that then obviously you must have hit your head too many times." With that, he leaned back into his chair and sighed tiredly, closing his eyes.

Dean sat completely silent, taking all that in. For the first time in what felt like months, a warm feeling of pride swept through his chest. Raised them...I did...didn't I? And for a brief moment, Dean felt a moment of calm before his body caved into exhaustion and he passed out.