Author's Note - Thanks for the tidbits, Pablojcd. Here in my little writing world, I strive to please my readers. LOL. But believe it or not, there is a thing with being descriptive and overly-descriptive (see Anne Rice for details). Though I see where you're coming from. I'll add some more to be sure it flows well.
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02
CAUTION: THIS SIGN IS RADIOACTIVE
Chell didn't know what to make of that as she stood there in the Enrichment Shafts of Old Aperture, but she didn't test the idea either and just continued on. GLaDOS wasn't much help and simply complained about the destruction of her facility at the hands of the moron that Chell had allowed to take control. Chell had no rebuttal to speak against the AI and simply completed tests at the prerecorded messages by Cave Johnson.
"Caroline, are the compensation vouchers ready?"
Just then, GLaDOS froze where she stood and blinked rapidly. Her features were strange; her expression was like that of a human as if they were fighting some sort of possible loss of consciousness and when Caroline spoke over the prerecorded message, GLaDOS spoke with her.
"Yes sir, Mister Johnson." Then, she looked horrified. "Why did I just-Who is that? What the HELL is going on here?"
Chell stared at her with wide eyes. She had no idea either and looked just as shocked as GLaDOS. She watched the AI pace around frantically before walking over and shaking her by the shoulder with one hand in an effort to calm her down. It must have worked because GLaDOS stopped pacing long enough to resume her calm persona. She regarded Chell with a strange grimace on her face before nodding her head weakly.
"Yes, I should calm down," she said, evenly. "No answers will get found if we sit here losing our minds. We're still going to find out what the hell is going on here..." She smiled and inhaled deeply, a gesture meant to calm herself. "but we will do so with the utmost calm."
Chell nodded her head in agreement. It was pointless arguing with that logic and the two continued through the old Enrichment Shafts. When they eventually arrived at a chamber where Repulsion Gel was present, Cave Johnson's voice announced it right on time.
"Alright, let's get started. This first test involves something the lab boys call 'repulsion gel.' You're not part of the control group, by the way. You get the gel. Last poor son of a gun got blue paint. Hahaha. All joking aside, that did happen - broke every bone in his legs. Tragic. But informative. Or so I'm told."
Chell glanced down at a ditch filled with the blue gel, then up toward the exit before she looked at GLaDOS. The AI read her stare and glared at her, slowly shaking her head with warning and showing those synthetic teeth. She really could have passed for a human.
"Don't. You. Dare." she hissed.
Chell grinned somewhat and slapped her on the back, sending the AI bowling over with a yelp. She bounced up into the air ungracefully and made it to the very top where the exit was located. Chell took a moment to savor that little spill before she jumped onto the gel and was launched into the air, landing beside GLaDOS who had fallen onto her butt. She smirked down at her and GLaDOS scowled with venom.
"Don't ever do that to me again!" she spat.
Yeah, not so fun when you're doing the tests, is it? Chell thought smugly, walking on. It was nice being the one to dish out the punishment every once in a while, especially if the punishment was for the one who gave it to her.
The two continued on and GLaDOS wandered into an office while Chell looked around for potential dangers. She didn't see anything out of the ordinary and could hear GLaDOS ranting in the office. She closed her eyes and drifted in and out of reality for a bit, savoring the moment of rest, despite the AI's furious sentences she spouted.
"I'm going to die down here! I swear by all that is holy and pure in Science, I am going to die and all at the hands of that mute lunatic before we get a chance to burn up in the atomic fireball that little idiot is going to - "
Suddenly, she screamed and Chell rushed into the office, finding GLaDOS ducked behind a table and watching an open exit door in fright. Chell had never seen the supercomputer this terrified before and was mildly concerned at the possibility that something truly dangerous was out there. She stared at GLaDOS for an explanation and the AI pointed a shaking hand toward the door, looking wildly between it and Chell.
"A monster! The monster's out there!" she shrieked. "Kill it! It's evil!"
Chell looked at her strangely, unused to seeing the supercomputer this terrified; but she slowly advanced with her Portal Gun toward the door. GLaDOS remained hidden behind the table, watching the door warily. "Be careful!" she gasped, "It's dangerous! I saw the gleam of its beady little eyes!"
Chell swallowed hard, preparing for the worst when she opened that door.
The horrible monster was in fact -
- a bird?
A black crow was nestled perfectly into a nest on the catwalk, cawing without a care in the world. It looked at Chell and twitched its head, studying her. She bit her lip and struggled not to laugh. So THIS was the terrifying monster that had startled the omnipresent, articulate Queen of Aperture? She smiled and fought with every bit of breath to keep a straight face as she entered the office. GLaDOS looked at her anxiously.
"Did you kill it?" she asked.
Chell shook her head with a broad smile.
"Don't laugh at me!" GLaDOS snapped, rising from behind the table, "That sneaky little thing went right for my face!"
She started to advance, but the crow cawed out again and she quickly ducked behind the table once more. Chell opened the door for GLaDOS to see as she shooed the crow away. GLaDOS watched it disappear into the darkness above and she smiled, attempting to look professional once again.
"Oh, look at that. It flew off," she murmured, trying to save face, "Well...good for him."
O
All Chell and GLaDOS could hear over the prerecorded messages were Cave Johnson's ranting, mindless explanations of Aperture and Caroline speaking with him. Nothing seemed to be of any used to them and Chell seemed to figure most of it all out anyway. Whenever Caroline's voice would sound even for a fleeting moment, GLaDOS would react with a strange sort of uncharacteristic fear that Chell had never seen before.
They stepped into a more elaborate office where Chell went to work looking around before starting to leave again. She stopped when she noticed that GLaDOS wasn't following her and glanced back. The AI was standing in front of a portrait of two people and Chell walked up to her. She glanced up at the humanoid supercomputer, noticing that GLaDOS was staring at the people in the portrait with an unflinching intensity.
It was of Cave Johnson and Caroline.
Hm. They looked like the financial toll of Aperture's failure had aged them much more than they were meant to be. Chell had to admit to herself that Caroline looked rather beautiful. Cave Johnson looked...rough and unpleasant.
GLaDOS looked frozen, unable to move as she stood there and for a moment, Chell was concerned that the AI had suffered an unfortunate system crash. She slowly and hesitantly reached out, but GLaDOS retreated from her touch with a shriek.
"Don't touch me!" she shouted, retreating to the other side of the office.
Chell watched in alarm as GLaDOS leaned onto the desk with her back to her. She mumbled something over and over, covering her face with one hand.
{Goodbye Caroline.}
[Mr Johnson, I don't want this.]
(Youmakeher)
(MAKE HER!)
[I don't want this.]
{pleasedon'tdothispleasedon'tdothis}
Streams of endless voices filled GLaDOS' mind. Broken fragments of things she shouldn't have had. Things she didn't want. Things - She looked up and noticed that Chell was watching her with a worried frown. How was it so possible that this little test subject was worried about her? Moments ago, she had made every effort to kill her with the help of that little moron, and now she outright worried for her? This human was brain damaged after all.
"What are you looking at?" GLaDOS snapped dazedly, "Are you going to gloat? Just go away and leave me alone..."
Chell made a face and glared at her, shaking her head in disbelief.
"You're probably happy to see me like this, aren't you?" GLaDOS moaned, rather pitifully, "You win. My facility is going to explode and take us all with it." She laughed weakly, shaking her head. "It's rather funny when you think about it. In a sad, tragic kind of way." Another laugh emerged from her speakers and she gestured to her own head. "I have an idea! Cut off your own head and stick it into his body! That way, you can stop him on your own!"
Chell had never seen the supercomputer like this. She glanced at the portrait and then back to her. Something was strange about this...Caroline and why her voice as well as the sight of her made GLaDOS act strangely.
Then, it suddenly struck her.
Caroline...GLaDOS...
Were they one in the same?
The facility shook above them, giving her less time to think about it when she grabbed GLaDOS' arm and yanked her to follow. GLaDOS uttered a stream of furious curses and hateful words, but Chell ignored them. Let the AI hate her as much as she wanted. If they didn't get the facility back under control, it wouldn't matter anyway.
Looks like I have to be the one in control here...again... she thought.
Her work was never done.
O
"All right, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons? Don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back!"
Well, that was a strange speech if Chell had ever heard one like it. It had started up as soon as they completed the Conversion Gel chamber. GLaDOS seemed to be enjoying though because she just grinned and nodded her head, getting excited by it like someone on the receiving end of a motivational speech.
"Yeah..." she said.
"Get mad! 'I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?' Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons!"
"Yeah!"
Chell looked at GLaDOS, amused.
"Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's going to burn your house down! With the lemons!"
"Oh, I like this guy." GLaDOS said, grinning down at Chell. She threw her fist in the air. "Yeah, burn his house down!"
"I'm going to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!"
"Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!" GLaDOS cried, still smiling.
It was strange seeing GLaDOS suddenly in "higher spirits" again, one that didn't involve her doing any particularly dangerous testing or trying to kill her, but at least she seemed to have forgotten about the incident in the office. For now, anyway.
Cave Johnson's voice died down into a softer tone now, laced with sickness. Chell mostly ignored it until he started discussing what was to happen after his death, "...I will say this - and I'm gonna say it on tape so everybody hears it a hundred times a day: If I die before you people can pour me into a computer, I want Caroline to run this place. Now, she'll probably end up arguing with you and say she can't. She's modest like that. But you make her. Hell, put her in my computer. I don't care."
It suddenly occurred to Chell - longer than it probably should have - what became of Caroline.
She was standing right next to her.
Somehow, Cave Johnson must have permitted Aperture to put Caroline into a machine - what was GLaDOS - by uploading her mind into it. The way it seemed though based on what she heard, Caroline probably had no other choice in the matter. But that didn't add sympathy to Chell toward GLaDOS in the slightest; she wasn't a human being and was damn sure not a friendly machine. She was only helping her now so that the facility didn't kill them all.
GLaDOS simply frowned when Chell stared at her like she'd produced another set of arms. "What are you looking at?" she snapped. "Stop staring at me like that."
Chell didn't want to think about it for much longer as the facility above shook again. They made their way further into a gel factory and GLaDOS started going over various lists of torture she would ultimately inflict upon Wheatley once she caught up to him. While Chell was looking for a way out while observing the office control panel, GLaDOS' tirade faded in and out.
"Crushing's too good for him. First he'll spend a year in the incinerator. Year two: Cryogenic refrigeration wing. Then TEN years in the chamber I built where all the robots scream at you," GLaDOS mumbled, "Hmm...no. Maybe I'll rip him open with my own two hands, increase his sensitivity to pain, pull each wire out slowly..." She grinned cruelly to herself, tapping a finger against her lip. "Ah! Yes, I'll yank each one out slowly. Then solder them back together slowly. Then repeat as needed..."
Chell looked back at her with dismay and beckoned for her to come over.
"What's the matter?" GLaDOS said, smiling mockingly, "Can't read a simple control panel?" She sighed and walked up, studying the panel briefly. "I don't want you to beat yourself up about it, but the fact is, you're human and brain damaged. Which, when you think about it, is technically your fault."
Chell glared at her impatiently. She didn't have time for GLaDOS to insult her right now.
Nope. She wasn't giving the AI the satisfaction of even responding to them. Never had. Never will.
"Hmm..." GLaDOS pressed a button on the controls and the lights in the entire factory suddenly went out.
Chell stared at her skeptically in the dark.
"I can still see that look you're giving me right now," GLaDOS said, annoyed.
An alarm sounded and the two glanced out of the office, in time to see a lift descending from the ceiling. It would take them up into the testing facilities and out of these primitive Enrichment Shafts. GLaDOS smiled with satisfaction and Chell rolled her eyes, trying to bite her tongue against retorting the AI's know-it-all behavior. Of course, Aperture felt the need to constantly remind her of how "unintelligent" she was, Chell could still have the last laugh.
She placed an orange portal over the lift and one beneath the catwalk they stepped onto. GLaDOS looked at her when the chubby meat sack gave her a slight push. "Oh no..." she groaned, shaking her head rapidly, "Nonononono!"
Chell smirked and nodded, pushing the artificial woman right off of the catwalk and through the portal. She appeared on the lift, landing hard with a furious curse. Chell soon followed and GLaDOS let out a yell of fright, rolling out of the way to avoid being trampled. Indignant, she sat up when Chell pushed the lift button and they began to rise.
"That was unpleasant!" she snapped, "I thought a beached whale was coming right toward me! Oh, my mistake, it was just you, you crazed lunatic!"
Chell smiled in smug satisfaction.
Well, at least it would shut her up for a while.
Hopefully.
O
The facility was a mess.
Chell and GLaDOS couldn't fathom how someone could ruin an entire facility of this size in such short a time. Of course, the sight of her facility in such a state brought GLaDOS to a whole new level of anger. Before she could start up on another rant, Chell could make out the sound of movement in the small office they had hidden in and she whirled, only to come face-to-face with two robots; one with a short, spherical head for a body and another with a cone-like head. And they both possessed Portal Guns.
GLaDOS smiled when she saw them.
"Oh look, my cooperative testing initiative managed to live to fight another day," she mused.
Chell remembered seeing blueprints for these two robots in Old Aperture, but GLaDOS hadn't been willing to explain it to her. The names listed on them were Atlas and P-Body, probably names that Cave Johnson's scientists had come up with before GLaDOS sent the whole population into the grave. From what she understood, P-Body was in possession of feminine attributes like GLaDOS and Atlas possessed masculine attributes.
"It's... just something I came up to phase out human testing just before you escaped," GLaDOS explained. She shrugged her shoulders and smiled somewhat in a manner like she had been caught doing something untoward. "It wasn't anything personal. Just... you know. You DID kill me. Fair's fair."
P-Body threw her hands in the air and chattered something that made GLaDOS stare at her in furious disbelief.
"He did WHAT?!" she exclaimed.
Atlas gestured to the window of the office overlooking a testing chamber. It was a simple chamber without any form of dangerous tests and had a single red button. The room itself was filled with Aperture boxes that literally crawled about aimlessly. They had turret-like heads fused in twos and small claws. To Chell, they almost reminded her of little hermit crabs. However GLaDOS looked displeased by their condition.
"Look at those things!" she growled, "Now, he's channeling his inner Doctor Frankenstein."
Chell couldn't help but feel a little sympathetic toward the creatures, watching them fumble about in the room. Of course, there wasn't a shred of sympathy on the AI's face. She turned to Atlas and P-Body with a brisk stare.
"I want the two of you to hurry along," she ordered, "I can't imagine what he'll do if he finds you."
P-Body nodded her entire core and Atlas gurgled, giving a quick salute before the two formed portals out of the room. Chell could hear Wheatley yelling impatient commands at the moving cubes and even though he wasn't exactly bright, he still sounded rather dangerous.
"How in God's name can you not do the one thing you were designed for?" Wheatley shouted furiously, "...There you go! Yes! The button! Warmer. Warrrrmer. Boiling hot. Boiling - okay, colder. Ice cold. Arctic. Very, very, very cold - LOOK JUST GET ON THE BUTTON!"
GLaDOS made a ooh sound and smirked at Chell. "Oh no. The poor little idiot sounds so frustrated."
Chell managed a smile and formed two portals to leave the office. GLaDOS followed behind her. They entered a lift that took them to the testing chamber and Chell looked around. The puzzle was so simple and ridiculous that she looked at GLaDOS painfully. The AI shared her sentiments and nodded sadly.
"There's unfortunate stupidity and then there's just incurable stupidity," she murmured, "I know it might be hard, but solve his...test...so he'll come back."
Chell rolled her eyes and picked up one of the boxes with her gun, not even sparing a moment to argue. It was unavoidable anyway.
The box stared at her with its broken turret heads, the tiny legs wriggling in fright. Chell stared at it with a weak grimace before placing it onto the button. GLaDOS waited impatiently for Wheatley to return on the large monitor he had situated in the chamber. It didn't take long because Wheatley's eager sphere body appeared on the monitor with a relieved sigh.
"Ha ha, YES!" he cried, "I knew you'd solve it!" When he noticed GLaDOS standing there with an arched brow, he sounded surprised. "Oh. Hello."
GLaDOS shook her head with disgust. "I've seen some rather pathetic sights since my activation, but I believe this one qualifies you for the Museum of Natural Idiocy I plan to build if we live long enough to see another day."
Wheatley growled furiously. "I told you, I'm not an idiot!"
"You are doing a MARVELOUS job proving both of us wrong." GLaDOS sneered, with a mocking smirk. Then, she looked dead serious. "This whole facility is going to be destroyed because you can't maintain it! Put me back in charge and we all won't cease to function!"
Wheatley laughed scornfully. "Ah, you'd like that, wouldn't you?" he said. "You'd like to go back to being the Head-Twat-In-Charge, wouldn't you? Well there is no problem and the facility is NOT going to explode! I AM IN CHARGE!"
GLaDOS blinked somewhat and looked back at Chell. "Did he...just call me what I think he called me?"
Chell smiled weakly and shrugged.
GLaDOS returned her gaze to the screen with renewed fury. "Listen, metal ball," she warned in a voice of venom, "You can either put me back in charge, or when I come and get my hands on you, I will make you pray that robot hell will accept you after I'm through. But I'll just cut to the chase and say that I won't be. I am not going to play the test subject to all your little, uh..." She glanced around briefly. "...tests."
"You don't seem to be hearing me!" Wheatley hissed, "You are gonna test. I'm gonna watch. And everything is gonna be JUST... FINE."
Just then, the Aperture Science announcer spoke up once more. "Explosion imminent. Evacuate the facility immediately."
"SHUT UP!" Wheatley screamed at it.
Of course, the announcer didn't shut up. "Warning. Reactor core is at critical temperature. Warning: Core overheating. Nuclear meltdown imminent."
GLaDOS turned to Chell, seeing no point in arguing. So she had tried civility, not they had to get nasty. Much to her surprise, one of the turret mutations clung to Chell's leg and the human test subject was frustrated in attempting to shake it free. GLaDOS smiled somewhat.
"Hmm, I may just keep a few of these after all," she teased.
"Go through the door!" Wheatley bellowed impatiently, "Now!"
GLaDOS' amusement disappeared and she gritted her teeth. "If that insignificant little moron thinks for one second that I'm going to - "
Chell shook her head rapidly and grabbed GLaDOS' arm, kicking the turret aside and smiling innocently at Wheatley, waving at him and showing him wordlessly that they were going to comply. She pulled the furious AI with her through the Emancipation Grill. They stepped onto an elevator that would - unfortunately - take them to another one of his brainless tests. GLaDOS let out a human-like groan of disgust.
"This is ridiculous," she snapped. "I am a professional tester!"
Chell said nothing, as usual.
The ride in the elevator was suddenly rather uncomfortable as the two waited for it to take them to the next chamber. GLaDOS was staring up at the ceiling of the elevator and Chell's gaze started to wander. Such close proximity with someone who had tried to kill her felt very...unsettling. But it didn't really matter now. Things had changed and it was Wheatley who was trying to kill them both. They had become allies, even though the both of them were still suspicious toward each other.
GLaDOS smiled down at her. "Say, remember when we cleared the air back in Old Aperture? Is there...anything you want to say to me? Anything?"
Chell bristled where she stood.
"Anything?" GLaDOS encouraged, "Anything at all. Take your time..."
Chell gave her a funny look at the AI was closer to her now with a smile and an inquisitive look. When Chell didn't respond - obviously embarrassed by their closeness - GLaDOS huffed somewhat and leaned back.
"Okay, fine. I'll ask you again if we don't end up vaporized."
After a moment, Chell actually smiled and tried to hide it.