Oh the anticipation is unbearable! I got my sister's laptop so I can finally update. I was able to read some reviews from my cell phone and I must admit it inspired me, and, as always I thank those of you who have reviewed. You make it easy to want to continue writing. I was able to enjoy some new fics from my phone, cuz yeah I'm addicted like that. There's lots of good ones floating around. Keep up the awesome work everybody! There are too many that I really liked to list. I was jealous I couldn't update my own story…so anyway…here goes.
Chapter 3: Confession Sessions
The sun shone with all it's late afternoon glory as Katara and her father were making excellent time en route to the Southern Air Temple. They had only stopped momentarily the previous night to quickly eat and feed Appa and were again airborne within half an hour. Their instincts had told them not to linger for too long on the crescent-shaped island at the southern tip of the Fire Nation, heeding Aang's warning of a possible resistance of Ozai loyalists.
Katara was on her second shift of flying while Hakoda was napping in the saddle. He awoke to fluffy clouds passing quickly overhead, noticing it was early evening from the sun's position in the sky. He yawned, stretched, and sat upright to greet his daughter.
"How are we doing?"
"Oh, hey, Dad. We're making good time, it shouldn't be too much longer. How was your nap?"
"Surprisingly restful," he replied with another stretch. "I wasn't sure I would get much sleep up here, but it's actually quite peaceful."
"Oh, yeah. I forgot this was your first time flying." She turned to face him. "I should have asked you if you were comfortable. I'm sorry. I guess I've just been a little preoccupied thinking about Gran-Gran's condition," she said, her voice concern-laden.
"No worries, Katara. I understand, I'm worried about her too." He crawled to the front of the saddle. "I've actually been very comfortable. Appa and I had a chance to get to know each other while you slept this morning. Isn't that right boy?" He leaned forward to scratch Appa between the shoulders. Appa groaned in reply and Hakoda chuckled.
Katara smiled and gave Appa an affectionate scratch behind the ear, when she noticed out of the corner of her eye the first small islands of the Batola Mountain Range coming into view.
"We're almost there Dad! Look, there's the start of the island chain there," she claimed in excitement pointing downward.
Hakoda leaned over to see, then shifted his glance from the islands to his daughter, who suddenly seemed to be lost in her thoughts.
"It was very kind of Aang to allow us to travel with his bison," Hakoda mentioned. Something about her expression told him of whom she had been thinking.
Katara's eyebrows raised quickly as she turned her attention to her father. "Yes, it was," she agreed.
"Apart from being the Avatar, Aang seems to be a really decent guy," Hakoda stated.
A small smile crept across her lips. "He is. He's got to be the most genuine and compassionate person I've ever met."
"The two of you seem to be very close," the Chief implied, now studying his daughter's expression with an analytical eye.
Katara smiled sheepishly, unable to hide the blush that flooded her cheeks upon the mentioning of the closeness of their relationship. She quickly recovered, adding a remark she hoped sounded indifferent.
"Of course we are. He's my best friend. We've all been through a lot together over the past few months. He and Sokka are like brothers, right down to teasing me and grossing me out," she said giggling nervously. She hoped she had succeeded in avoiding her father's implication.
"Ha ha!" Hakoda laughed heartily. "Yeah, I can see that happening." He paused momentarily, relaxing his back against the side of the saddle and crossing his arms across his chest. "How old is Aang anyway? Are he and Sokka close in age?"
Katara turned around fully to face her father. "He's thirteen, although, he's never mentioned a birthdate. He was raised by monks; they didn't dwell on things like that. They taught their apprentices to be detached from worldly distractions. He says it was so their spirits could be free," she pondered this for a moment, "while, I can't imagine why they would want to deprive the kids of at least some acknowledegement on their birthday." She frowned a little. Birthdays in her homeland were always celebrated with a meal with the tribe. She couldn't imagine missing out on such an opportunity for a family to celebrate together.
"Hmm. That's interesting," Hakoda said. "Does he still consider himself a monk, or, hold to their beliefs?"
"Well, I'm not so sure he considers himself a monk in a literal sense. That culture disappeared over a hundred years ago. He's struggled with that, but he does still cling to their beliefs. He doesn't eat meat, and believes that all life is sacred. He flat out refused to kill Ozai, even when all of us were insisting it was the only way." Katara leaned back on her hands balancing her weight, and sat with her legs crisscrossed. "He always brings up tokens of the wisdom he gained from the monks. They had an interesting way of looking at the world, very philosophical. They made Aang the person he is. He's such a free spirit. He's taught me a lot…" she trailed off, watching the sun sparkle on the ocean's surface. "It's amazing to me that he's held on to those aspects of his personality, given all that he's been through. His people and his entire culture were wiped out, yet, he still displays incredible inner strength…I really admire that about him."
"He must draw some of that strength from his past lives," Hakoda said. "It seems he's weathered more than his fair share of storms. He's an exceptional young man."
Katara nodded in agreement. "He's got a truly unbendable spirit," she said.
Hakoda nodded slowly and looked at the mountains in the distance growing closer. Katara followed his gaze and turned her body slightly away from him. They sat in silence for a few minutes, admiring the breathtaking view before them. After a short time had passed, Hakoda looked to Katara. "Speaking of birthdays. You're fifteenth birthday is coming up soon. It's only a couple of months away now," he said.
"Yeah", she replied, not breaking her gaze away from the mountains. "Maybe we can all celebrate as a family this year." She smiled at her father, and he nodded, smiling.
"You know, not to sound too forward, but usually when a Water Tribe girl turns fifteen, she begins searching for a capable man to marry. Now, before you say anything, and I don't really mean to pry, but because you've had the opportunity to travel, I was kind of wondering…if you had found anyone you may consider. I mean, since sixteen is regarded as the age in which marriage is appropriate." He looked at her with raised eybrows and a sideways glance, while Katara's eyes widened in shock. Her heart began to race within her chest. Just what was he saying?
"Why would you bring that up, Dad? I don't need your help if that's what you're getting at." Her eyes narrowed. "My upbringing has been anything but traditional. I don't expect you would hold me to the custom of marrying at sixteen."
"Well, what did you have in mind?" he inquired.
"I would think that you would trust me to make that decision for myself, when I'm ready. With all that's happened recently , I just don't think I'm quite there yet. Besides the fact that there's still so much work to be done in helping Aang restore peace. I intend on going back once Gran-Gran is better." She looked down, feeling a little like she was turning her back on her father, her grandmother, her tribe. "I'm sorry, but life is different for me now. I finally know where my place is. I spent all of my younger years wondering if I would ever get the chance to make a difference. Now I've been given that chance…and I know my work isn't done yet." She looked at Hakoda, a little fearful that he would be hurt, but relaxed when she saw understanding in his eyes.
"Fair enough. I believe you'll make the right decision when the time comes. But I was just wondering…because you know Kanna will ask you about your future endeavors. I wanted you to be prepared to answer that question." Hakoda smiled slightly.
"Well I don't really want to talk about my personal life if you don't mind. I'd really rather just focus on getting home and helping Gran-Gran get better." With that she turned away from her dad, signaling that the topic was no longer up for discussion.
"I'm sorry, Katara. I just--"
"Dad look! We're here!" she interrupted, pointing ahead of them toward the beautiful temple.
"And we made it before susnset," Hakoda marveled at the speed with which they had traveled such a long distance.
Katara leaned over to 'hug' Appa and scratch his head. "Thank you Appa, now you can finally get some rest." Appa grunted in relief. Katara sat up straight closing her eyes whispering, "we made it Aang…we're safe."
--o--o--o--o--o--
The sun was setting on Aang as he sat meditating in the center of one of the palace gardens. He had found quite the perfect spot that reminded him a little of the Spirit Oasis in the North Pole. There was a pallet of soft grass, a quaint waterfall that emitted a soothing trickling sound, and a small pond that swirled in front of him before finding its way downstream. He was surrounded by a beautiful arrangement of flowering plants and shrubs, and a few trees dotted around the area. While out for a walk, he had not intended to meditate, but the atmosphere was so tranquil, it seemed to beckon him to stop and absorb it. So, here he sat, wrapped in this tranquility, when a soft whisper interrupted his peaceful state of mind:
"We made it Aang, we're safe."
His eyes flew open. "Katara?!"
Funny how the universe communicates with one when it has a message to deliver. He moved to sit with one knee and one hand to the ground, closing his eyes and concentrating, tyring to sense Katara's, Hakoda's, or Appa's energy. After a few minutes, he smiled and relaxed, having picked up the faint but calm energy signatures of the three. He stood and began to walk back to the palace feeling that a burden had been lifted from his shoulders.
--o--o--o--o--o--
Aang took dinner in his room, eating out on his balcony with Momo. He laughed as his pet scurried between the different platters, taking several items from each one.
"Calm down buddy, it's just us tonight. There's plenty to go around." Aang looked up at the sky; there was no moon tonight. He sighed…just as the sky was missing the moon, he was missing Katara.
The rest of the group was dining out. He had considered going with them until Zuko and Sokka started talking about how good that particular restaurant's roasted turtle duck was. After seeing the cute little creatures on the palace grounds, he decided he'd rather not see one on a platter. Aang pushed his plate away and sank back in his chair as Momo hopped into his lap, curling up with his tummy full. Aang petted him along his back, staring blankly out toward the ocean.
"I wonder what Katara was going to say earlier", he said. Momo purred and looked up at him. "You miss her too, huh? Yeah… it's gonna be weird with her being gone. She's been with me just about everyday since they found me." He scratched Momo's ear, "I hope her Gran-Gran is alright." He sat there for a while, enjoying the cool breeze coming off the ocean.
Autumn was coming soon, it was evident in the coolness of the night. Aang thought about how he had always especially liked the Fall. The Air Temple was always beautiful that time of year, with the trees all different shades of yellow, orange, and red, and the sky the most brilliant shade of blue, he remembered. As a child, he used to use his air bending to make funnels of air to pick up the fallen leaves. Gyatso had described them as "Autumn Cyclones", and would laugh as Aang and his friends jumped into the piles of leaves that formed when Aang released them from the whirlwind. The elders never seemed to mind. At least it kept them from having to rake the leaves from the courtyards. He smiled at the fond memory and found himself anticipating the upcoming season.
He heard voices traveling up the corridor.
'Everyone must be back from dinner.' He stood and picked up his tray from the table, and walked into his room. He heard Sokka yell "Ow!" and laughter ensue from Suki and Toph.
"G'night Twinkle Toes," Toph called out holding two fingers up over her head as she passed Aang's open door.
"Goodnight," he called back, as he sat his dinner tray outside his door in the hall. He heard Sokka and Suki talking quietly to each other. He turned to walk back to the balcony when he felt a presence behind him. He squinted his eyes shut and tensed, he knew who it was.
"Can I come in?" Sokka asked from behind him.
Aang looked at him. "Sure, what's up?"
Sokka came in and closed the door behind him. "We need to talk."
Aang gulped, "um okay, what about? Is everything alright?"
"Yeah, I suppose," Sokka stated. "Can we sit down?" he asked, pointing to his still bandaged leg.
"Yeah, sure. Here," Aang said, offering to help Sokka out to the balcony.
Sokka held his hand up and smirked, "I got it, I got it," he said limping toward the door. Aang walked out ahead of him and pulled a chair out from the table for Sokka. Aang sat and stared at him, waiting for Sokka to start talking. Sokka stretched his injured leg out to the chair across from him and reached across the table for the tea pot.
"I'll get it for you," Aang said as he poured a cup of tea for Sokka.
"Thanks," Sokka said, relaxing in his chair. Aang twiddled his thumbs nervously, watching Sokka sip his tea. "I need you to tell me something…and be honest." He set his cup of tea on the table and looked at Aang, his expression serious and flat.
"How do you feel about my sister?"
Aang's eyes got wide as he scratched the back of his neck. "Um, well…heh," he blushed furiously and looked at Sokka, whose expression had not changed, even given Aang's obvious embarrassment. Aang took a deep breath and tried to steady himself to try to find the right words, lest he face the wrath of an angry older brother. He let a small smile curl on his lips as he looked at his lap, still blushing. "She's beautiful--"
"Well there better be a lot more to it than that," Sokka interrupted, his tone sharp. He narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms across his chest.
"Of course there is! Katara means a lot to me." Aang paused for a moment, trying to put his feelings into words. "She's my balance, my voice of reason, my strength when I can't seem to muster any. When my emotions get the better of me, she's the only one who calms me. She's my best friend…uh, next to you of course," he said smirking at Sokka. He looked down again.
"I love her." He admitted it. Simply and smoothly, surprising himself. He searched Sokka's face for a change in expression, approval, disapproval, something. There was nothing. He just picked up his tea and sipped it. Right as Aang was about to say something, Sokka spoke.
"Have you told her that?"
Aang looked down again, "well sort of, I guess, well…no."
"Why not?"
Aang sighed deeply, "it's not like it's that easy."
"See! All of this could have been avoided if you would have maintained aloofness." Sokka added matter-of-factly.
"Yeah, about that…aloof really doesn't work for me. Like you should talk anyway. I didn't see you maintaining aloofness-" he said making air quotes, "-with Suki.." Aang said folding his arms across his chest.
"Hey, that was not the same situation. She made the first move, and for your information I told her it wasn't a good idea at first. That's how you maintain aloofness, my friend."
"Riiiight. That's why you were spazzing over her safety all day on the Serpent's Pass, and I'll bet your telling her it wasn't a good idea had something to do with Yue. Am I right?" Aang teased.
Sokka paused with his finger in the air and mouth agape, the point he was trying to make suddenly deflated by the Avatar's totally accurate accusation. He waved his hand around dismissing his comment. "Whatever, moving on. This isn't about me and Suki, we're talking about you and Katara."
Aang blushed with a goofy grin on his face. Hearing Sokka speak of them collectively that way was somewhat of a relief, like Sokka accepted his feelings for her. Sokka groaned at Aang's expression and rolled his eyes.
"Well if you haven't told her how you feel about her, then how is she supposed to know?"
Aang's blush reached a deep crimson. "Well, I guess I didn't exactly use words."
Sokka's brows knitted together in confusion for a split second before they shot up to his hairline and his mouth dropped open. "You kissed my sister?! Where was I?!"
"Mm-hm-mm," Aang shrugged.
"Okay, well when did this happen?" Sokka asked in disbelief.
"Well--" Aang began, "the first time--"
"WHAT?!" Sokka shouted, throwing his hands in the air. "How did this happen more than once without me knowing?!"
"Mm-hm-mm," Aang shrugged again. "So, um," he paused and took a deep breath. "The first time, and I'm not even sure it counts, was in the cave outside Omashu." He noticed Sokka open his mouth to say something so he quickly continued. "It was her idea. Our torch was about to burn out and we were afraid of being lost in the cave. She thought us kissing would be the only way out of the curse, you know, to trust in love. So, we did it, right as our torch was burning out. It wasn't anything major, our lips just touched, really, before we noticed light coming from these crystals on the ceiling. That's what lead us to the cave's exit. The second time, though, was a little different."
"The Secret Love Cave. I should've known." Sokka said smirking. "And the second time?"
"It happened before the invasion, on top of the subs when we came up for air. After your dad told us it was time to go, you all went back below decks. We were talking and she commented on how much I've grown up and that she was proud of me. I said something about everything being different after that day and she agreed. Then a thought occurred to me. If I didn't make it, she would have never known how I felt about her. There really wasn't any time for words, so I just kissed her."
"How did she react to it?" Sokka asked, somewhat intrigued.
"She returned it, but she looked a little sad after. I'm not sure what she was thinking. With all the stuff that happened after the invasion, we really didn't get a chance to talk about it," Aang said shrugging.
"So that's it? You just left it at that?" Sokka asked.
"Not exactly. I confronted her on her feelings for me the night of that stupid play on Ember Island."
"Haha yeah…that play was hilarious," Sokka said reaching for his tea.
"Glad you thought so. I got sick of watching it so I went outside. She came out there with me a little while later and we talked about how dumb the play was, then I asked her if she really felt the way the play depicted her: that I was like her brother and that she didn't have feelings for me."
"Ooh, and what did she say?"
"I don't know."
"Uh, what do you mean you don't know?" Sokka asked confusedly.
"No, that's what she said. She told me those were the actor's words, not hers. Then I said it was true though, that we had kissed at the invasion and I thought we were going to be together…and she said 'I don't know'." Aang looked down at his lap. "I totally messed up."
"How did you mess up, Aang?"
" I pushed her for an answer, asking her why she didn't know. She started to talk about the war and having other things to think about. She said it wasn't the right time. So I asked her when the right time would be…and she told me that she was confused." Aang looked sad for the first time during their conversation. "So I thought if I kissed her that it would help her make up her mind. But I was wrong. She got mad, scolded me, and stormed off," he said frowning.
"Hm," Sokka hummed while thinking. "Maybe your timing wasn't so great, but I know my sister, and she's a lot of things, but she's not confused."
"But she said--"
"I know what she said, but you haven't seen things from the same angle I have." Sokka said.
"What do you mean?" Aang asked. It was his turn to be confused.
"I've noticed Katara acting different around you. Ever since you got hurt in Ba Sing Se, she's been totally protective. But it's more than that." Sokka paused to again sip his tea. "I tried to deny it at first, because it's just hard for me to accept that my little sister is growing up. But I saw that she was beginning to think of you as more that just a friend, starting the night Azula shot you." Aang shifted in his seat. Just talking about that night made him feel uncomfortable.
"When she met us at the surface, she was struggling to carry you, so Toph and I helped get you onto Appa so we could get to safety. She couldn't really tell us what happened, all she said was, 'Azula….lightning'. It was then I noticed, that light usually present in her eyes was gone. She thought you were gone, and so did I, and I knew my sister would never be the same. But when she used that special water, and you woke up, instantly the light returned to her eyes, and she held you. She hardly left your side the entire time you were out. Some nights, she even fell asleep on the floor beside your bed."
Aang wrinkled his brow at Sokka's words, "I never knew that."
"Yep," Sokka stated, "and then after that, while we were in the Fire Nation, I could tell things were different between you two."
"So you don't think she's angry with me?" Aang asked, sounding hopeful.
"Not at all," Sokka said matter-of-factly. "You said this happened on Ember Island? I couldn't tell anything had happened between you two. She probably just wrote it off as war-related stress. I mean, just yesterday you two were walking to breakfast together and hanging out on that pier. She's not mad at you, trust me, I would know," Sokka said pointing at his chest. "You know, you're pretty clueless to be so full of wisdom." Aang laughed, a little embarrassed.
"But seriously," Sokka began, "if you two are going to do this, there's a couple of things I need to say first."
Aang gave Sokka his signature grin and nodded, "okay."
Sokka held up one finger, "first Katara's kind of got these walls up. A tough exterior with a 'not always able to be so tough' interior. If she's opened up to you, and kissed you," he said with a cringe, "that's a pretty big deal. I expect you to appreciate that for what it's worth."
He held up a second finger, "also, Katara is fiercely loyal and faithful to those she cares about. She has a big heart and will forego her own needs for those of another. I expect you to never take advantage of those qualities. Now, I know you probably already know those things about her, but it was necessary to point them out to bring me to my third point," he said holding up a third finger, "if you hurt her, I'll hurt you." Sokka pointed his fingers in Aang's chest.
Aang pushed his hand away, beaming widely. He stood from his chair, folded his hands together and bowed toward Sokka. "You have my word. I would never hurt Katara."
Sokka stretched and stood from his chair, "good, now that we've gotten that out of the way I can get some sleep."
Aang looked at Sokka, "um, hey. What about your dad? Do you think he would approve? I know the Water Tribe has these customs."
Sokka began to walk toward the door leading into Aang's room. "Don't worry about that Aang, you're the Avatar. From a father's perspective, it doesn't get any better than that…" he turned to look Aang in the eye. "…and I can't think of anyone else I would rather see my sister with. If you make her happy, then that makes me happy." He walked through the doorway, then popped his head back out, "goodnight, Aang."
"Goodnight, Sokka." Aang looked at the ocean again, yawned and stretched. "Maybe it'll all work out after all." He walked into his room, air bending a breeze toward his oil lamp to extinguish the light. He removed his shoes and shirt and climbed into bed where Momo was already asleep. He snuggled into his pillows and blanket and whispered, "I miss you Katara," before drifting off to sleep.
--o--o--o--o--o--
Meanwhile at the Southern Air Temple, Katara and her father were sitting by their campfire. A breeze was blowing in from the Southwest, making Katara shiver. She pulled a blanket from her bedroll and wrapped it around her shoulders.
"Good thing Aang packed us some extra blankets. It's a little cool tonight," she said, pulling the soft material tighter around her body.
"Autumn will be setting in soon. You think you'll be able to handle the cold weather back home?" Hakoda asked her teasingly.
Katara smiled. "I've only been gone for about 9 months, Dad. That hardly removes me from fourteen years lived in the South Pole. Although, I did enjoy the warm weather. We got to visit so many beautiful places."
"Meeting Aang has changed your and Sokka's lives completely hasn't it?" Hakoda asked.
"It has, in so many ways," Katara agreed nodding. "I've had the opportunity to master water bending, and Sokka's well on his way to becoming a master swordsman. We've met so many wonderful people and learned about different cultures and customs. We got to learn a lot about our own culture when we visited the North Pole. Aang and I even got to train there with Master Pakku, who married Gran-Gran by the way, did you hear?"
"Yes I heard!" Hakoda replied. "They were engaged many years ago. That's pretty amazing."
"Yeah…Oh! Did I tell you I met a woman living in the Fire Nation who was a water bender from the Southern Water Tribe?"
"No, I don't think so. How did she end up in the Fire Nation?" Hakoda asked, intrigued. He knew that there had been no water benders in the Southern Tribe for quite some time before Katara.
"Her name is Hama, she was taken from home about sixty years ago in a raid. She taught me many useful water bending techniques and about my heritage. She had a bit of a dark side, though. After being held in a Fire Nation prison for many years, she developed a technique called blood bending, that she used to control the soldiers' bodies to escape."
Hakoda furrowed his brows together, "blood bending?"
Katara nodded as she responded, "yes. She learned to control another's body by bending the fluids in it. She was bent on revenge and she had started to take innocent people and lock them in a dungeon during every full moon."
"Wow," her father said. "Did she teach you this technique too?"
"More forced it on me that taught it to me. She turned Aang and Sokka on one another and I had no choice but to stop her before they hurt each other." Katara hugged her knees to her chest, eyes downcast. "It's a technique I hope I never have to use again." They were both silent for a moment, before Katara changed the subject. "Speaking of revenge…I found the man who took Mom away from us."
The color drained from Hakoda's face as he stared at his daughter. Shocked, he began to stammer over his words, "h-how did y-, did you find him?"
"Zuko…he asked Sokka about that day, the day of the raid. He had this notion that the reason I didn't trust him was because of what the Fire Nation did to our family, and that he personified the Fire Nation for me. I guess in a way he was right. So anyway, he asked Sokka what he could remember and he told Zuko about the sea ravens on the flags of the lead ship, which he immediately identified as the Southern Raiders. Zuko told me he could help me find the man and I jumped at the chance to avenge Mom's death."
Hakoda looked at Katara, stone-faced. He prepared himself for the worst. Was his daughter really capable of murder?
"What did you do?" He asked expressionless.
"I went to Aang to ask him if I could take Appa, and he wanted to know what was going on. I told him, and he was afraid that because I was so hurt and angry that I would seek out revenge, and do something I would regret. He said the monks said something about revenge being a two-headed rat viper, that while you watch your enemy go down, you're being poisoned yourself."
"I've heard that before," Hakoda said. "There's a lot of truth and wisdom in those words."
"He told me I should forgive the man, which angered me, and when Sokka agreed with Aang, I really hurt him," she looked downward to the fire, becoming entranced by the flickering flames in front of her. "I told him that he didn't love Mom like I did. I really feel bad about that now, but at the time I was feeling like my emotions were out of control."
"Understandable. You've never really let yourself greive for your mother. You just stepped up and took on her responsibilities. Both of you were forced to grow up before you were ready," Hakoda said, his eyes glinting with tears.
"That's why I felt so strongly about doing this," Katara said. "That man took so much away from us." Katara took a deep breath, eyes still locked with the camp fire. "I went with Zuko later that night to take Appa and we were caught by Aang and Sokka."
"Was Aang angry with you?"
"No, he started to talk about forgiveness again, but when he realized he couldn't change my mind, he gave me some good advice. He said when I found the man, he hoped I didn't choose revenge, to let my anger out, and then let it go."
Hakoda smiled slightly, "wise beyond his years, isn't he?"
"That's not how I felt at the time, but yes. When we found the man, I couldn't get Aang's words out of my head."
"Where was he, that….man?" Hakoda's eyes narrowed.
"First we found the fleet. Zuko knew that it would have been the leader of the Southern Raiders that would have taken Mom. We went to the wheel house of the ship, but the man we found wasn't him. So after I used blood bending on him, he was scared enough to give up the information on the retired leader." Katara looked away, ashamed, wiping a lone tear from her cheek with the backs of her fingers. "He told Zuko the man's name was Yan Ra, that he had retired a few years before and where to find him. So we went to his village and followed him until we caught him alone."
"Did he attack you?"
"No, he sensed us, but we had the element of surprise. Zuko took him down, and I walked up to him and asked him if he knew who I was. At first he said no, but then he remembered me as the little Water Tribe girl. I told him that Mom lied to him, that she was protecting the last water bender. He asked who, and I told him it was me. And as I stopped the rain around us, and it started to build up in a dome above us, I could feel his fear. I formed the water into spikes and hurled them in his direction and he cowered, but for a second, my rage outweighed his fear. But just as I began to send the spikes in his direction, Aang's voice entered my mind, and I stopped them, mere inches away from his body." Katara sighed and squeezed her eyes shut as tears began to fall. "I dropped my hands and let the water fall around him. I told him how sad and pathetic and empty he was, and, as much as I hated him, I couldn't do it." Hakoda moved to her side, placing his arm around her shoulders. "I could see the emptiness in his eyes. He began to apologize, and told me that if I took his mother, it would be fair."
"He said what?" Hakoda scoffed.
"I know, he's completely heartless. He had to be to do what he did to our family. I guess his absence of spirit is punishment enough. Anyway, I had gotten my point across. So we left him there, trembling and sobbing in the rain."
Hakoda used his left hand to brush some stray hair behind Katara's ear. "That took a lot of strength, Katara, to control your emotions and hold back. A lesser person would have given in to their anger and hurt."
"You think so? I thought maybe it was because I was too weak to follow through," she said looking up at her father.
"Absolutely. You did the right thing. I'm proud of you."
Katara smiled, wiping the tears from her flushed cheeks. "Thanks, Dad. Aang said the same thing," she said with a half-smile.
Hakoda moved his arm from her shoulders and placed his hand on her left shoulder. "His opinion means a lot to you, doesn't it?"
Katara nodded, focusing on the fire. "He's influenced me so much, and I never realized how deeply until that moment."
"You're lucky you had your friends and your brother there to comfort you," Hakoda said, squeezing her shoulder.
Katara shook her head, "I didn't let them. In fact, I pushed the closest one away."
"Who?"
"Aang." She was quiet for a moment before posing a question to her father. "Dad, can I talk to you about something? I'm not even sure if you want to hear it but--"
"Katara, you're my daughter, my baby girl. You can talk to me about anything," he said moving his hands to his lap.
Katara smiled and pulled the blanket around her again. "It's about Aang…" she blushed a deep rouge. "I think my feelings for him run deeper than just friendship."
"You think they do?"
Katara sighed. "I know. But I may have messed it up."
Hakoda looked confused. "Why do you think that?"
"Because. A couple of days after I confronted that man about Mom, Aang confronted me on my feelings for him, and I basically blew him off." Hakoda raised an eyebrow over a sideways glance.
"I freaked out. I mean I was pretty sure he had the same feelings for me, but I wasn't expecting to discuss it until after the war was over. He caught me off guard and I wasn't exactly truthful with him.
"What happened?"
"Well we went to see this play, it was about us, about our journey. It was a terrible depiction. They had a woman playing Aang and the other parts weren't cast much better. The whole thing was wrong, especially the interpretation of our relationship. They had us giving each other high-fives and saying that Aang was like my brother, and that I didn't think of him in a 'romantic' way.
Hakoda chuckled slightly. "They're just stage actors, there's no way they could've known what you all are really like."
"Well, Aang didn't see it that way. He got upset and left the theater. I found him outside at the intermission. I tried to tell him he was overreacting. After a minute, he asked me if I really felt the way the actor said, if I felt he was like a brother to me and I didn't have feelings for him. I tried to assure him that I didn't say that, an actor did. But he insisted it was true, that we had kissed at the invasion and he thought we were going to be together, and I told him I didn't know."
"What were you unsure about?"
Katara put her hands on either side of her head and squeezed her eyes shut. "I don't know! Nothing…Everything! I just told him with the war and everything that it wasn't the right time." She exhaled sharply and put her hands in her lap, relaxing her facial experession. "He asked me when the right time would be and I told him I was confused."
"What did he say?"
"Nothing…" she shrugged, "…he kissed me."
"Really?" Hakoda's surprise quickly faded due to Katara's downcast look. "I guess that didn't change anything?"
Katara shook her head, "no, I yelled at him and walked away."
Hakoda looked to the orange flames, as if for guidance. "Hm. If you don't mind me asking…why do you feel confused?"
"That's the thing, I'm not. I never was. If I were to be truthful, I would say that really, I was scared."
"Of?"
"We almost lost him in Ba Sing Se, I didn't think I could handle losing him again. If I let myself be open and he never came back I would've died inside. It would have been like losing Mom all over again…the same wound reopened, the same pain."
"Katara, after all you've experienced in this last year, you should know life is all about risk. You took a risk leaving your home with Aang to help him. You all took risks in protecting each other when adversity arose. You took risks against the Fire Nation to restore peace to the world. You did these things without a second thought. If Aang wouldn't have come back, do you think it would have been better for him to have known how you feel, or to fall in battle never knowing?"
Sadness overcame Katara's features, "you're right, I'm a terrible person. How could I have been so selfish?!"
"No Katara. You're not. Not at all. Love…is scary. It's a very powerful emotion. To give into it, to give your heart to another, takes a great amount of courage. You know what I think?" Katara looked into her father's eyes. "I think you were under a lot of stress. You put a lot into preparing for this war, and maybe, as a defense mechanism, your mind wouldn't let you take on any more emotional stress than you were able to handle. You shut down. You've put up many walls since your mother died. It'll take some time to tear them down."
A crooked smile played on Katara's face. "Maybe you're right about that. But I think Aang's already helped me there too, although he didn't know it. He's the only person who's ever gotten through to me on that level. He experienced a great loss too, so we were able to relate and help each other start to heal. Helping him overcome his grief kind of helped me to bury mine, but before the war ended, it all came rushing back. I just became emotionally overloaded." Katara ran her hands over her hair, appearing as though the emotional strife was still taking its toll.
"You've been so strong over the years," her father said. "I don't see that faltering any time soon. You'll get the chance to make it right with Aang. Just thank the spirits he did come back."
Katara nodded in agreement. "Do you…think he could be angry with me, or, that I…hurt him?"
"I think that Aang is a very reasonable young man. I've seen the way the two of you look at each other. I didn't detect anger at all. If he hasn't presented hurt or anger to you, then no, I don't think he is. He's probably just playing it safe and waiting until you feel ready," Hakoda encouraged her.
"Thanks, Dad. I'm sorry if I was a little rude with you earlier. It's just when you started talking about my personal life I was afraid you were trying to arrange something for me like they do in the North," Katara blushed feeling sheepish.
"Of course not. That was never my intention. I've always felt you were capable of making that decision on your own. Besides, lately," Hakoda smirked, "I've had a growing suspicion that you were going to tell me something was going on with you and Aang."
"Really? And…and that was okay? I mean, you approve? Aang's not from the Water Tribe and I thought--"
"Aang is a good person, not to mention, the Avatar. I could wish for nothing better for my daughter," Hakoda said beaming.
Katara hugged her father, then pulled away to look at him. "Thank you, Dad. For listening, for the advice, for everything. I feel much better now."
"Good, then you should sleep well. We need to leave at sunrise if we want to make it home before dark," Hakoda said walking over to his own bedroll and stretching.
"Okay. But first, I need to go see Appa." She went over to their supplies and pulled two melons from the food basket. "He'll sleep better on a full stomach."
"Do you want me to come with you?"
"No, thanks Dad. I won't be long." She bid her father goodnight and walked across the stone courtyard to an area outside the temple where the bison used to sleep. It was open to the air, but had a roof to shelter it from the elements. She found Appa there asleep, but he stirred when he heard Katara's footsteps approaching. He groaned a greeting as she neared him.
"Hey Appa. I brought you a snack." She placed the melons in front of the bison and he nuzzled her as thanks. "You're welcome," she said giggling.
"I wonder how Aang is doing," she pondered petting Appa. He groaned in response. "You miss him too huh? It's going to be weird not seeing him everyday. We've hardly been apart since we found you guys." Appa gulped down the two melons and stretched.
"Alright Appa, you get some rest. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow." She petted Appa's nose and he lightly licked her hand. "Goodnight, boy."
Katara started to make her way back to the campsite, when she stopped just outside the area where Appa was sleeping and looked up. "Gosh, it is so beautiful up here." A light breeze came up, kissing her cheeks and playing in her hair. For a moment, although there was a great distance between them, she thought she heard Aang's voice whisper. She smiled, feeling suddenly warm all over. "I miss you too, Aang," she whispered into the wind, closing her eyes. She made her way back to the campsite and settled into a dreamless sleep.
Woo! There's the latest. Extra long for those of you who were patient enough to care and check back on this story. Chapter 4, Requests and Reunions, is in the works. R&R lemme know if you loved it, hated it, or fell asleep reading it.