I wished more thanonce I hadn't promised you a drunk Kakashi in this chapter whil I was writing it. It got longer than planned and I barely managed to fit him in without making a too long chapter. It's still too long, but I think it's enjoyable nonetheless.
Still unbetaed, which means it's probabaly full of mistakes and odd sentences. Although my English has greatly improved in the last months, I still don't trust myself one bit ;) If you run across any doubtful sentences, I'd like to know it.
Enough of useless babble and onto the fic!
Enjoy and leave me tons of comments! Tell me what were the best parts! I always love to hear from you
PART III
One drink, two drinks, three drinks...
"So? Are you drunk yet?"
"Very funny," Iruka snorted into his punch, taking another mouthful of the tropical mixture. Around them, the party seemed to have finally started off, people laughing and yelling louder than before to hear each others through the boisterous music. To Iruka's own surprise, it seemed like he had already drowned half of his drink in the last twenty minutes. As for Anko's bloodymary, it was long finished and she was already starting her second one. "But seeing how fast you drink, I think you'll be drunk well before me."
"Hey! I hold my alcool very well, thank you very much," the said woman said with faked indignation, taking another sip at her second bloodymary. "Well, we might as well get over with it already. So! Tell me something about Hatake Kakashi."
Iruka rolled his pink umbrella between his fingers, thoughtful. "Well, I don't know where to start..."
"Why not explain me how you feel toward him?" Anko suggested him as she stared at Genma's table absent-mindely.
"Huh, well..." the academy teacher started off hesitantly. "Whenever I see him, I feel my heart hurt and I stiffen."
"So you're nervous?" she asked her friend casually.
"Yeah... I guess, yeah. And I don't know why, but he annoys me," Iruka tried to explain to his orange drink, becoming more confident. "I don't know why, it must be something about his casual attitude... He always looks like everything's fine, like he's in control and it annoys me. And the worst part of it is that he IS always in control! That's just... unnerving..."
Iruka frowned to his drink, rolling the umbrella faster between his fingers. Anko watched him closely.
"And whenever he appears somewhere, I always notice him at once," the man grunted again darkly. "I can't help it! I can't get my eyes off him if I know he's around. It's like, I don't know, an obsession or something. And it annoys me to no end!" Iruka slammed his fist on the table, making both their drinks shake. "I can't get him out of my head! Even when I'm at home, I think of him. I even dream of him at night! I can't stand it anymore! Even when he's not there, he's annoying me!" he finally yelled, aggravated. Iruka's outburst caught the attention of some people around their table, who looked their way curiously. They both remained silent until everybody had returned to their joyful activities, which took around 5 seconds. Then Anko stared at him, frowning slighty.
"But what? What exactly do you think about when you think about him?" she asked Iruka quietly.
"Nothing and everything, really... His unconcerned attitude, his voice..." the brown-haired man started off reluctantly. "His strange hair, his mask... the first time we met, what Naruto had told me here and there about him, the rumors I've heard... and his stupid perverted book."
"Can't think of anything else?"
"No, not really," Iruka admitted, frowning in concentration.
"Okay, then it'll be all for now," the purple-haired woman conclued brightly as she drank another mouthful of her drink. "Drink up, Iruka."
Iruka stared at his drink dully, doubting the effectiveness of his friend's methods. Then again, he had nothing to loose.
----
One drink later...
"... And that's annoying!" Iruka grunted to his drink, bitter. "Do you realize, Anko? Everybody just LOVE him, the great Copy nin, Sharigan Hatake Kakashi! He's so famous, so great! So incredibly unreachable!" he spat with spite, drinking anohter mouthful of him new drink. Anko stared at him, an undescribable expression on her face.
"You think he's unreachable?"
"Yeah," the man calmed down a bit, staring at his two neatly lined up pink cardboard umbrellas, almost sulking.
"Unreachable as a teacher, a colleague or a person?" Anko pondered suddenly, eyeing him suspiciously.
"What?" Iruka asked her, frowning.
"Ah, forget it. Say, you said something about thinking often about him, right?" the Kunoichi inquired to change the subject. "When does it happen exactly? What are you doing when you're thinking about him?"
"Well, huh..." Iruka started off unwillingly, rubbing the back of his neck in an embarassed fashion. "I mean Anko, is that really necessary...?"
"Oooh, we're frightened, aren't we?" the purple-haired woman bent forward her friend, a crooked smile on her lips, her eyes glowing with interest.
"No! That's not it!" the chuunin denied at once nervously. God, she could be frightening when she wanted to!
"Then spit it!"
"Okay, I, well... In an awful lot of places, actually..." the tanned man admitted unhappily. "There's in the mission room, of course. And during my lunch breaks at the academy, too. And at diner time at home. When I'm with Naruto, and when I wake up the morning. Whenever I see porn somewhere, I can't help thinking of him too - because of his book, you know," Iruka felt the need to explain. "There's also when I wash my clothes and do the grocery. And whenever I walk on the busy streets of Konoha, I can't stop thingking that I might walk into him. I also think about him when I know he's on a mission, and when he returns from one. And when I visit the memorial too. And, huh," the academy teacher looked down at the table, grunting, "...when I'm in my bed too." There was a short uneasy silence - at least it was uneasy on Iruka's part. Anko seemed rather amused, or at least Iruka thought so.
"When you're in your bed?" she asked him in a very suggestive way, her eyebrow raising.
"It-it doesn't prove ANYTHING, okay!" Iruka spluttered, red spreading lightly across his cheeks. "And don't give me that look!" he added furiously as Anko stared at him with knowing eyes.
"Sure thing," she chuckled into her bloodymary, amused. Iruka looked away at the crowd, which was louder than ever. Somewhere while he was talking with Anko - even thought it seemed more like a one-sided discussion to him - someone had set up a Karaoke stage. On it could be seen a suspiciously waddleling Asuma, singing in duo with an equally smatched kunoichi. From the look of it, they seemed to be horrible signers - no ninja with that amoung of alcool in their body could sing decently - but, fortunately for them, Iruka's table was too far from the stage and the surrounding noises were to loud to allow them to hear properly what they were singing.
Then he saw him again. Not too far from the karaoke stage, the Copy nin was standing in silence between the Hokage and Gai, who seemed to be bickering about some thing or another. It musn't have been important, since it was obvious Kakashi wasn't listening to him at all. Well, it wasn't as if the great Sharigan user cared about what anybody had to say... Iruka snorted into his drink. Then he saw the silver haired jounin stare longingly at the exit as the other jounin continued on with his little rant. Ah ha! He couldn't leave either! At least they were stuck in the same boat, he thought sarcastically, his lips curving into a bitter smile. Just then, the chuunin felt Anko tapping on his shoulder.
"Hey, Iruka! Are you listening or what?" she asked him reproachfully. "Geez, you get so engrossed when you start watching him!"
Caught staring at Kakashi, Iruka felt heat spread across his cheeks. But, before he could protest or even make an indignant comment, the purple-haired woman spoke up again.
"I'm gonna grab myself something to the bar, want another drink?"
----
Another drink later...
"Seriously Anko, how can you drink that stuff?" Iruka pointed at her friend's full glass of Minth cream with disgust.
"What? That's yummy."
"But you've just drowned two Bloodymary and one Bloody Ceasar! They're made with tomato juice!" the chuunin burst out in mock horror. "And now you're drinking Minth cream!"
"And your point is...?" Anko replied sneakily as she took another sip of her creamy drink.
"Never mind," Iruka sighed.
"Hey! Do you realize it's already 10:43!" Anko informed him as when checked the time on her watch. "That's way past your usual leaving hour, I'm proud of you, Iruka-kun!
"Think you're funny, heh?" the brown-haired man replied with sarcasm, a small smile on his lips. "What were we talking about again?"
"Dunno," the kunoichi shrugged lazily, her drinks starting to have some effect on her. "Ooh, let me guess! Hatake Kakashi!" At those words, Iruka remained silent, contemplating something mentally as his eyes drifted toward a silver-haired man's head.
"Say, do you think he has a girlfriend?" the chuunin asked slowly, his gaze never leaving the other man.
"Kakashi? Nah."
"Yeah, he must be too perverted to even have a steady girlfriend..." Iruka muttered, a bit gloomy.
"I think he's more of a bachelor if you ask me," she told him casually, her eyes calculating.
"Hm... Yeah, that makes sense," he mumbled darkly to his drink. "'Must be handier that way to have one night stands I guess..."
"What makes you think he's sleeping around a lot?" Anko asked him, frowning. Iruka stared at the table, a bit uneasy.
"Dunno... If he doesn't have a regular girlfriend, then he must have a lot of one night stands to, you know, unwind a bit... With all those girls lingering around him, he must have it easy," he commented on a rather disgusted tone, a hint of bitterness barely hidden in his spiteful words.
"What girls?" the jounin asked him, frowning. "You talk like he's got a whole harem of his own! There might be a few women spotting him, okay, but it's not like they're lingering around him. Plus, it's not because he has no lover he's having one night stands!"
"Come on, Anko! It's nothing we both don't already know: the ninja life his stressful. He needs to unwind!" Obviously, Iruka's drink were also starting to take effect.
"You're being unreasonable, Iruka," the purple-haired kunoichi shook her head. "Some ninja are able to 'unwind' without fucking the daylight out of their neighbors!" Yup, that was yet another legendary tactful Anko explaination.
"Okay, give me the name of one single ninja in his twenties who doesn't sleep around, not even once in a while?" Iruka asked slightly angrily, decided to prove his point.
Anko smirked victoriously at him. "You."
The chuunin gaped at her, stunned. "T-that's not the same thing!" he gasped out when he finally regained control over his voice.
"Why not?" asked him in a provocative voice. But before Iruka could think of something to answer her, their attention was attracted by a sudden commotion taking place near the karaoke stage. Before their eyes, they saw a rather tipsy-looking Maito Gai leave the group that had gathered in front of the stand to climb on it and take away the microphone from a clueless singer. Somebody just then rushed to stop the karaoke - Iruka thought it was Genma. Then, Gai started to speak with his brooming voice to the crowd, harboring his typically confident smile. The first few words of his speach were lost in all the noise, but gradually the room got quieter and Anko and Iruka started to hear the jounin through the noisiness.
"...after many years of battling, I'm afraid my prodigious imagination might have forgotten the true sense of originality. But my youthful friend Genma just gave me a magnificient and hip new idea to reaffirm our rivality!" Gai annonced proudly to the mass of more or less tipsy ninjas, himself rather red in the face. "An idea so splendid I want everybody to assist to it, on this joyful day of festivities! Kakashi! My most esteemed rival! I challenge you into a drinking game!"
For a split second, everybody stared blankly at Konoha's blue beast, until the information proceeded into their foggy brains. Then, there was a gigantic uproar in the room. A drinking contest! Almost everyone turned around to see Kakashi's reaction, who stayed still, blinking in astonishment - obviously, he hadn't been consulted about that. When too enthusiast people started trying to drag him toward the center of the room, Kakashi finally seemed to become aware again of his surroundings and started to protest mildly. At first, he was merely pushing them away, but they got more insistent and the Copy nin soon found himself running away from a small crowd of intoxicated, but still surprisingly skillful ninjas. Thus started a rather strange race, where the main target - or maybe the word 'pray' was more appropriated - was a dazed silver-haired jounin who probably wondered what he had done to deserve something like that. The Sharigan user tried his best to escape people who wanted to drive him back to the party, but all his chances of fleeing vanished when the Hokage herself caught him around his waist in a suffocating hug. She happily dragged her trophy toward the table, causing a great deal of joyfully drunk approuving yells. People started to gather around the table where the blonde woman had forced the Copy nin to sit to get a better sigh of the 'fight' that was about to occur. Through the noise of the crowd forming itself, they could hear the Godaime joyfully ordering loudly to "bring over the sake!", causing yet another uproaor.
Iruka just stared blankly at the whole scene as he lost sight of the silver-haired man through all that crowd. Beside him, Anko burst out laughing with mirth.
"This is just so great!" she managed to choke out finally when she stopped laughing, whiping the tears that were forming themseves in her eyes. "This is gonna be fun! I gotta see this with my own eyes!" She got up and motioned Iruka to follow her. "Come on, Iruka!"
"No, I'm not going," Iruka shook his head, not sure if the whole situation amused him or if he disapproved of it.
"Aw, you're such a kill joy!" Anko pouted as she sat back on her seat, gazing enviously at the enormous mass of nins who tried to get a glimpse of the small table where the drinking contest was going on, some of them even standing on the nearby tables to get a better view. "Oh, what I'd give to see the great Hatake Kakashi totally smashed!"
Iruka only snorted as he drank another mouthful of his orange drink.
"Tomorrow, Genma'll be soooo dead!"
----
Yet another drink later...
"...that stupid jounin, with his cool attitude and all!" Iruka mumbled to his fourth carboard umbrella, a bit tipsy. "And you know what Anko? He knows it! He knows how cool and mysterious and-and sexy he is!" Anko remained silent, watching Iruka's pouting face closely.
"And there's that damn book he's carrying everywhere too! That horrible, perverted orange book! He's setting a bad example for the youngsters, I tell you!"
"You keep on talking about that book," Anko stopped him, tired to hear him repeat himself. "You always say it's a bad influence. Are you sure that's the only thing bothering you?" she asked sneakily. Iruka pouted to the table, mumbling something under his breath.
"What was that?"
"Nothin'..." he grunted bluntly, lining up for the fifth time his little pink umbrellas beside his empty glasses. Anko rolled her eyes.
"Come on, I'm not going to laugh of you, I promise," she added quickly - or at least as quickly as she could with all the alcool in her veins. "Spill it already, Iruka!"
The chuunin grunted something inintelligible to the table, his head low. "Say that again?"
"He- he must like women a lot to always carry that thing with him," the academy teacher babbled darkly, a hint of sadness treathening to show up. Anko watched him closely, mild sadness appearing on her young features. She stared at her drink, frowning slightly.
"And with all those girls around him... He's so cool, he must have a lot of fans..." the brown-haired man continued bitterly.
"Stop," the purple-haired woman cut him, suddenly sounding much sober than seconds ago. "I think I know what your problem is."
At those words, Iruka turned around to look at her, slightly anxious. Somehow, he felt like he knew pretty well what she was about to announce him, but he didn't want to hear it. The chuunin suddenly felt the irrestible desire to cover his ears with his hands and run away as fast as he could. It must have shown on his face, because Anko gave him one of her rare sympathic smile.
"You already know, don't you?" she muttered quietly to her friend, who wanted to shrink on his chair. "You love him."
"No! I-I mean, I'm not gay!" Iruka spluttered in a desperate attempt to convince himself, shaking his head vigorously. "He's such a jerk, there's no way I would-"
"Iruka-"
"We barely know each other-" the chuunin continued, panicked.
"Iruka-"
"Plus, he's into women and-"
"Iruka-"
"There's no way he'd be interested in me..." he held his head in shame, staring at the table bitterly.
"And that's why you hate him so much, isn't it?" she started off quietly. "Because you think you don't have a chance with him... Because you're jealous of those girls who might at least have their chance..." Iruka closed his watering eyes and bit his lip, head hidden shamefully between his arms. If only she could be wrong...! If only!
The academy teacher suddenly felt tired, so tired of pretending. Those were his true feelings - and some part of himself knew that he wouldn't be able to avoid them anymore. Not now that he'd been forced to face them. He felt oddly sad at the thought. It had been so much easier to hate him, to turn a deaf ear to the burning desires of his aching heart... Now, how was he supposed to act toward the man? How was he even supposed to look straight at him?
Iruka suddenly felt the weight of Anko's warm hand on his shoulder, soothing him. He sighed heavily between his arms, melting into the warmth. He relaxed a bit, but still refused to look up.
"Hey," he heard the purple-haired woman whisper to his ear, "It's not the end of the world, you know. You're not the first guy who fell for someone who couldn't love 'em back."
Iruka heard himself snort at her comment. Trust Anko to depress someone further when she was supposed to be supportive. But, somehow, it made him smile.
"Thanks for your support," he replied with sarcasm as he straightened up.
"Anytime." She winked at him, finishing her drink. "Come on, cheer up Iruka. Hey, let's forget about Kakashi and get drunk together!" she burst out happily, grabbing him forcefully into a tight embrace, all hints of sobriety in her attitude vanished. "How does it sound?"
"I think I've had enough for tonight, Anko," Iruka replied dully, pushing the tipsy woman away gently. "I'd better go home... I need to be alone for a while."
"Aww, that means you won't drag your oooooooold friend Anko home when she'll be too smashed to stand?" his friend asked, faking a poud.
"I'm afraid so," he laughed half-heartely. "But if it can cheer you up, I give you my whole cardboard umbrella collection."
"That's too nice of you," she mocked, taking one of the pink umbrellas and carefully pinning it to her purple hair. "How do I look?" she asked on an uncharacteristic high-pinched tone.
"Drunk," he answered flatly. "I think you've had enough too, Anko."
The purple haired woman opened widely her mouth to protest when there was a loud crash nearby, followed by histerical laughs. They both turned around to see that someone had apparently fell over the table beside theirs, knocking over the whole table and a few chairs. A few meters away, a small group of drunken people, of which Raidou, Asuma and Genma where part of, were laughing so hard that Iruka wondered why they haven't died from suffocation yet. Giggling, Anko got up and walked - with more or less ease, Iruka noted - toward the fallen table happily to help the other man up, since it seemed he wouldn't get up on his own. When she got a sight of him, she swore loudly.
"Iruka! It's Kakashi!"
To be continued.