EDIT: Just fixed some problems about the italic words. I hope the chapter looks better now, it took me lot of effort to write the whole thing.
Warnings: Angst, lots of angst. Kefka being random again. Squall being a dick, as usual. Use of the word 'crotch'.
III. Unknown Intentions.
They were terrified, she knew. The insecure magic girl destroyed a good bunch of the glass manikins with just one blow. Almost managed to hurt Bartz in the way. But... if he didn't realize on time, he could have lost his arm in the middle of the monstrous fire she created.
He said it was okay. Everyone tried to convince Terra that it'd be fine, that it wouldn't happen again.
They were lying.
Even Cloud. He previously saw how easily could she lose control on her powers. Bartz and Zidane were just a little frightened, but they didn't knew how worse could it have gone. The girl wasn't capable of getting a hold of herself.
Terra tried to hide it from them. Words should be enough to make her strong... but they weren't. Her dominion over magic wouldn't go any better like this, in random battles against manikins. What she needed was discipline. Otherwise she'd have to get used to physical combat, and that wasn't an option for her.
But... who'd show her how to properly order her outraegous magical strength? Most of her comrades were more adept into sworsmanship rather than magic... and she feared this time their help wouldn't do.
She sighed behind her male group of cronies, just after repairing all damages—most of them were her doing—, so they moved on to next stage of this Gateway.
'I can't go on just like this... If I ever hurt anyone again, I won't be able to forgive myself.' Within her chest, again the sultry feeling of hate and confusion bloomed again faintly, leading her thoughts towards Kefka again, and his wicked crackle. 'I'll be ending up just the way he wants me to if I don't fix this quickly!'
"Terra, are you alright?" Zidane asked, evidently worried over her gloomy sight. She didn't speak after that sudden manikin ambush they were forced to fight. "If you want to talk about it..."
Cloud was looking at her too. Bartz was as lighthearted as ever, as if he never risked his own life before.
"I'll be fine, guys." she smiled. "You'll see, everything will be just fine."
Perhaps, their delight was getting contagious. She didn't want to smile, but uncounciously she did, in the same manner Zidane would do whenever he tried to cheer her up. However, it wasn't as if they couldn't see right through her despair.
"We are here for you, y'know. If anything troubles you, you can count on us. Right guys?" Zidane was such a leader, even managed to make Cloud nod in acceptation.
"I... just need time, Zidane. I need to become better at this thing of battling, alright?"
But it wouldn't help if she just spitted the words they wanted to hear. To become better, she had to get the best help she could... or a tragedy could grow in the vast battlefield.
"Hey, look! Isn't that Onion?"
She literally jumped and rushed blindly towards the armored boy. An overflowing joy exploded as she reached to her lost friend's hand. He violently flushed due her excitement of seeing him again. It was an emotion that pulsed fiercely inside her veins, and she couldn't explain it.
But it felt good. What was that?
If she wanted to keep this feeling alive, she should hurry to get a hold of her powers if she wished to protect it.
Sometimes it was like a fly, just following him around to annoy him anytime he wanted to. Almost in a child-like manner, the jester was bouncing around with the only purpose of driving him to ask. It wasn't as if Kefka felt lonely, Kuja wouldn't swallow that rock, but being stalked like that was starting to... disturb him in a way the white mage couldn't comprehend.
He's been wandering for hours like this. Not once he turned around to see Kefka following him, though he knew from the funky sound of his footsteps it was him.
Was he... watching over him?
The boing of his shoes was starting to drive him insane. "Won't you just leave me alone, you wretched scum?" Kuja yelled at the silly-looking character a few yards from him.
Kefka pretended to look offended due the young man's sudden rage.
"Okey-dokey-lokey, just realized there's nothing to see here—Cause nothing is what you're doing, you sissy twerp! Even that mamma's boy ended up being far more productive than you!"
Kuja just sighed hatefully to the madman and relaxed his facial gestures.
"... I'm not listening to you. I've got better drafts to think without you getting in my way." he spitted without a care.
But Kefka chuckled unamused. "Better than getting rid of the monkey-boy and his magical friendship?" This comment just made the Kuja frown. Again he was underestimating him.
"... Don't you have anyone else to bother?" said the youth placing his hands on his hips. 'It's not likely I'll share my plans with a pig like you.'
The harlequinn grinned wide. "Actually not."
"Then out of my sight, before I start considering a more painful way to end your miserable existence, foolish clown."
The young mage just turned around and kept walking foward–away–from the clown. Then... he thought his ears caught a faint malicious whisper.
"... Do not bite the hand of the master."
Kuja glanced back at the mischievous man. "What did you say?" He surely spoke some new silly insult that surely deserved a death penalty.
"—Don't have enough mustard!" As always, out of nowhere, Kefka spitted something random.
"Pitiful. Both insane AND stupid." Kuja remarked unaware. Uncaring. Unsuspecting.
He eventually stopped being followed by the baleful one. Maybe he got bored and finally ceased of stalking the mage. Unknowningly being part of the devil's chess game.
"Just go to your little playground. Once you unfold your wicked scheme, I'll be judge to see werether my little mind-rape game worked or not. It's gonna be SO fun. Either way you choose, you're just gonna end up being destroyed, Kujie-coo!"
They eventually crossed their path with yet another friend. Their trio was complete again. However, Terra wasn't sure they could be called a trio, since Squall wasn't precisely as vivacious as Bartz and Zidane. On the contrary, his gloom had a bit of resemblence with Cloud's. Other remarkable feature of the black-jacket young man was his height. He probably was as young as her, but he was the tallest among the group.
Even Cloud silently greeted him, but Terra barely managed to shyly glance at the sulky teenager's eyes. Squall suited him well.
"Zidane, one guy who wants you fought me back there." Squall abruptly said, interrupting Bartz's fanfare. This made Zidane frown slightly, unease.
"You mean... Well, you're in one piece, I guess." Zidane responded.
Squall just shook his shoulders, everything alright. "You should use care. He might try to attack Bartz too... and maybe you too." he said glaring at Onion, Cloud and Terra respectively.
And the thief wasn't the only one with that turmoil, the girl also held a strong feeling of sickness inside with the thought of that man fought by Squall.
"Squall." she called, so far she didn't steer her word to the warriot. "When did you face him?"
"A couple of Gateways from here... doubt he followed me though. The guy ran away like a coward."
"... Was he strong?"
The glum-looking youth shook his shoulders again. "He knew pretty much advanced magic, but that's all."
"That's how Kuja usually is. All magic, not physical." Zidane added.
"Sounds darn simple." said Bartz without a care. But the short one strongly disagreed.
"No, it's not, Bartz. If memory doesn't fail me this time... he's got an atrocious power if he..."
But before Zidane could finish to explain, everyone noticed how Terra was gliding away from them, silent as a butterfly.
"Terra, where are you going?" the small knight rushed to ask first. She looked ashamed, heavily nervous, but she managed to answer fair to her judgement.
"I felt Kefka's presence somewhere nearby. I just want to be sure..."
"Let us come with you." Zidane insisted, stealing Onion's spotlight in time, but he was speaking for everyone.
Terra of course appreciated the courtesy of her friends, but for this time it was a matter she could solve alone.
"... Thank you, friends. But... this is something I need to do myself. I can't overcome my fears if I don't do it alone." It was painful, but she'd be on her own until she completed her goal. "I'll come back for you soon, I promise."
She was leaving, even after she just reunited with her little Knight.
"Terra." Everybody felt how the boy's heart broke a little, but Squall grabbed the kid's shoulder before he could run to follow the girl.
"Let her go." he said in stern voice. "Sometimes, it's some time alone is what we just need..."
All the friends quietly thought about Squall's words, deciding werether he was right or not. He wasn't known for being the brain or the sympathetic from the group, but he sure spilled some good words for once.
They seemed to dubiously accept the idea of letting her go on her own, but as soon as they made up their mind, they realized that the youth in black was leaving again.
"Hold on there, Squall, where do you think you're going now?" Bartz stood in Squall's, which stopped him just momentarily.
Squall just plainly said: "We're on a quest to find our crystals. You heard Cloud and Onion. They had to do it by themselves. So is Terra. So am I."
"You never change, do you, Squall?" Zidane sneered.
"Cosmos approves it." After one last cold glance he continued onwards the path he needed to go. A lone wolf as always. Of course, he still kept Bartz's lucky charm, or perhaps he already forgot he was carrying the nasty-looking feather.
"Right..." Bartz sighed, trying to not look so upset about Squall's apparent apathy. "Then, I guess next time we see each other around, at least one of us will have the crystal, is that a promise?"
"Whatever you want." he mumbled back, almost as far his voice could barely be heard.
"We'll see you then! Won't take us too long, promise!" Bartz shouted content. Squall just disappeared.
Then the thief slapped against the floor his tail, maybe he was frustrated about his friends leaving too soon. "Gee, Cloud, Onion. So it's just the four of us then..." But suddenly, they witnessed how Cloud tried to part away from them too. This almost caused a erratic yelp to come out from the young blonde. "Man!"
Cloud, however, retained himself in calm, stopped before he could get the rest of his comrades leap over him.
"Gonna keep an eye on her... just to make sure everything goes okay." he said, a rather fair excuse.
"Ha! and I thought our Onion was overprotective to Terra!" the mime Bartz unintentionally joked over this, but he was clearly as upset as his companion Zidane. Then he interfered, for Cloud's anxiety's sake.
"Relax, Cloud. She'll be able to handle herself. You heard Squall. We can't always be there, otherwise she won't be gaining much confidence on herself anytime soon."
But the short Onion Knight had to intrude as well. "... No. Cloud is right. At least one of us should watch her from afar."
This alarmed the other two friends. Something Cloud and Onion knew that they certainly didn't know.
"Is there something wrong with her?" Zidane asked the carrot-haired boy.
"Sometimes, I don't really know under what circumstances it happens, but she tends to lose control on her powers." The explanation worsened the worried expression on his face.
"Sounds like a big problem."
"She's insanely strong, and without any control... well, you know, she could even hurt herself." Onion Knight continued. Cloud then leaned, interested.
"So, you have faced her in that state?"
"Yeah. Barely made it alive." said the warrior kid. "... Cloud, would you mind if I go with you? If something happened, you wouldn't be able to..."
"Guys, your talk is seriously getting scary!" Bartz interrupted, extremely spooked after his fellows' talk. Zidane was the same. "Are you truly considering on fighting her if something goes wrong?"
"Is it that terrible?" the monkey boy asked apalled. "You're not gonna let us chase our crystals after listening to that whole issue about Terra!"
"You say it because you haven't seen her when she loses it!" Onion protested, out of nowhere he got profusely mad. However, Zidane kept calm before the little warrior.
"I guess so. But still, even if her situation goes like this, it wouldn't go any better if you just keep on breathing under her neck, stalking her every move. If she suddenly knows how much we fear for her, it's just gonna make things harder."
"We're not putting it like that." Cloud shook his head. "She's perfectly capable of taking over her powers. What we fear the most is..."
"... that somebody could take advantage of her!" Onion finished the sentence. "There's a bundle of circus freaks who are looking for her, because of her powers."
That got them into deep thought. They remembered their last battle against a barricade of manikins and Terra seemed forced to fight. With an explosive spell she almost wounded Bartz, which could have been a deadly blow. Everyone knew that, but they haven't thought it'd be a serious problem, but a casual accident.
"Now. That's a real problem." Zidane sighed, defeated by the facts. "Our only girl in the team: chased by every single weirdo around."
"Right... so then at least one of us should watch her back?"
The small and the spiky-haired one agreed. "Cloud, what do you think? It's either me or you."
"... You're the most fit. Terra seems to trust you better than anyone." Obviously they weren't using the measure of strength to decide over this matter, and everyone already knew how much the youngest one cared for the magic girl.
But then, the young warrior hadn't will to keep his own blush for himself. "Y-you think so?"
"B'awww, you're turning red, Onion!" Bartz mocked over the boy. And as expected the boy rushed to deny it.
"Hey, it's not what you think!"
She hated to lie to her friends, nothing affected more than that, but there was no use. Somehow, Terra Branford knew she had to meet again with the man who fought Squall. The man who was opposed to Zidane, and maybe had the answer to maintain her powers under control.
The girl ran, walked, flown over the wastelands outside the Gateway where her comrades remained, hoping to guess the location Squall had that encounter with the mage of long white garments.
His image, no matter how many times she imagined it, was hard to believe. She didn't know much of men clothing, so she might be wrong, the outfit he wore seemed more suitable for a lady...—No, not even a woman would wear those, at least not in public. Maybe it was just the different fashion that reigned on his world... yet, Zidane's clothing didn't look so... extravagant.
'Why am I thinking about fashion anyways?' But now that she thought about it, it'd be hard to don't look at that man's crotch once they meet again. After hearing Zidane joking about that Kuja's outfit, she'd have a hard time focusing on something else. 'What am I so nervous about?'
Between her unnerving thoughts she felt she was going on circles, taking part of the wind's slow breath. She was sure she wasn't getting any closer to the next Gateway, and surely there were some manikins following her.
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all. Should she go back to her friends with the tail between the legs?
She found herself surrounding some sort of ruins made of stone. It somehow looked surreal, cause though there were signs of devastation, it seemed it was never habitated by humans, as if it was constructed that way. It was like some small town. Then she realized there was a presence wandering nearby those walls of stone.
But she wasn't afraid at all. Could be another moogle. Manikins didn't usually convey a certain kind of presence. They weren't living beings, so that might explain their lack of that especial emanation. It was weird though, because she seemed the only one inside her circle of comrades who was capable of sensing other beings' aura.
Terra casually walked along the lying pillars of stone, somehow trying to appreciate the silent dead beauty of the spiralling details carefully carved on the cinder, but the presence kept on getting closer and she grew fidgety, because she couldn't recognize to whom belonged this aura. It felt too strong to belong to a moogle.
A sweet whisper blew at her side, and standing upside the head of a tall pillar, her eyes met with the slender pale figure of the mage.
Frozen at the moment she identified the androgynous man, she felt her tongue got stuck inside her throat. It was like learning to speak with men again. But she gave her best effort to don't look scared or nervous.
Good thing that from up there he'd hardly tell if she was looking at his face or his crotch.
"Heh, what a pleasing surprise. Was my lady looking for me?" His voice was as soft as velvet, and his skin looked as it. Now she realized how smooth it seemed to be, since he was showing that much.
"... I think I haven't thanked you for what you did for me back then." she said loud enough to be heard clearly. She needed to lose inhibition if she wished to be taken serious by this funny-looking man.
However, he kept on staing at her, his bright blue eyes were hard to read compared to Zidane's, so was his smile, so sleek and so shadowy. It was like trying to see through fog.
He came down to the same ground she walked in one lissome leap. His silver hair flowed like cascade, he was even more beautiful than Goddess Cosmos herself, and it was quite disturbing since he was male.
"Why, what you just needed was an outlet for your energy. By repressing such power, it eventually grew out of your control. I just took the necessary measure to chill down that restless flame of yours." They weren't particularly strong words, but Terra was having a hard time on trying to look straight at his eyes. Whenever she tried, she kept on averting.
"Still, why would you help me? You could have taken advantage of me on that moment."
"I'll guard my reasons for myself, besides..." Then she saw him bowing attentivelly to her, in a most polite manner. "... it was a pleasure to offer my aid to a beautiful young lady in distress."
"Uhm... thank you?" She was a bit relieved to see this kind of behaviour on him. 'He isn't that different from Zidane.' However, he was noticeably more haughty than the blond one.
"And how rude of me! I apologize for the late introduction." He stretched out his hand. "You may call me by the name of Kuja."
Just for prudence, she remained closed, choosing not to acceot his hand. "... I'm Terra." But he didn't appear offended, not after she said her name. In fact, Kuja looked astouned, and his pale tender face seemed to gleam at the sound of her name.
"Terra? What an intriguing and beautiful name." He wasn't mocking, but his overly-dramatic voice sounded like it at this point.
"I... Wait a minute. You are from Chaos' Warriors. I don't understand why would you just..." Terra watchfully stepped back, taking careful distance from the other mage. "I don't get it."
"To get started with... Mind sharing your reasons for chasing after me, my dear Terra?" They just met twice and he was already playing with the name.
"My reasons? I think you may know them already." she answered dryly. "Else, why would you expect me to find you?"
Kuja smiled nimbly.
"Your powers are quite something. And yet you seem to fear them to the point you don't dare exploring their full potential."
"All what my powers have done so far is to destroy. I'm tired of it all. I don't want to destroy things or people. I don't want to hurt anyone anymore." As if it wasn't fairly obvious to him ever since last time.
"Illustrate me. If those powers are yours, how do you let this happen?" His eyes enclosed, but focused strongly into her, without drifting his smooth smile.
"I know they are, but—"
"There's no reason for such a weak willed girl to possess such strength. It's pointless if you can't control it. Those are YOUR powers, and if you don't solidify your mind, along with them, you are nothing but a tool." His words hit her like stones, yet his voice never failed to sound so evenly. "The weak lose their will to the strong. There can't be an unbalance between two forces, dear canary."
Terra's heart dropped one pound and she closed his eyes heavily, trying so hard to don't let her tears come out. But how silly. She didn't even remember how to cry!
She took a slow breath and stared again at the vain young man. "Why are you telling me this?" It was his intention to hurt her, but it was a necessary pain, to pull her out of her main flaw. Her weakness.
"Aren't my words of any help at all? Or do you still want to see me as the bad wolf of your fragile fairy-tale?" He came one step closer when she covered her eyes with one hand, but she again took care of the distance. "There, there. Crying is not a a luxury for a warrior, is it?"
"I'm fine. I cannot cry anyways." her voice cracked a bit, but recovered in a matter of few seconds, gaining enough strength to look at him in the eyes again.
"Is that it? A shame. The tears of a maiden can merge into a most tragic beauty..." Terra decided to don't understand what he spoke about a girl's tears, cause it seemed he knew just as much as she did: nothing. "—However, I'm not poisonous. At least not for you, pet." At least she could admit he was a bit charming with the usage of words.
"If you were like Kefka, then I doubt you'd point these things out for me." It was all she could come up with.
Now, that really seemed to offend him.
"Of course I'm not like that annoying fool. And I do pity you for having the displeasure of knowing him." Now she knew, he hated Kefka.
"Glad you don't get along with him." she smiled faintly. It was still strange, since the man before her was so far considered as an enemy. "So you say I must be of stronger mind if I wish to control my magic better..."
Kuja raised one thin brow. "In that way you'll be able to use it as you please."
Before she could even realize, she found herself building a new question she might regret.
"Could you...? You're a strong mage too, right?"
He grinned slowly. "I'm open for suggestions, Terra my dear."
"Would you... perhaps... teach me?"
It came out. She couldn't believe she just said it. Kuja just smiled wider.
"Tell me, canary, what is it that drives you unto wanting me, a Chaos Warrior, to abet you in such a delicate and personal matter?" The tone he used to formulate the question wasn't helping much her entusiasm. But she started to see with her heart's anxiety, not with her mind's eye.
"You helped once. I know there must be a reason for it; warriors of Chaos don't normally do things like that, I guess."
Maybe it wasn't turning out to be her brighest idea. But it was a risk she wanted to take. Besides, Kuja couldn't be THAT bad, could he?
"And what, dear, shall I get in return for what you inquire? Mmm? Set the price, if you can."
"I don't know..." That was a problem, and there wasn't much she could offer without damaging her morals or compromising her loyalty to her friends... That was it. "What about this? If someday you are in a hurry, if you ever get in trouble, I'll come to save you in any way I can... Is that alright for you?"
His grin twisted, while he quietly studied the girl's proposal. It couldn't save her from some nasty outcomes, but it was smart enough to don't force her unto misguiding deeds.
"Hn, doesn't sound fair enough, but I guess that's the best you can offer due our current position." Terra missed a heartbeat right there.
"So, is it a deal?"
Kuja just turned around and walked away. He seemed to love suspense, after he finally gazed back at her with a placid smile on his face.
"When do you wish your lessons to start?"
It came all of sudden. She felt a rush inside her heart, realizing of how unreal it felt to have a Warrior of Chaos willing to fullfill her request. It was a dream she couldn't shake off. But then again, she had to reply if she wanted to be done with it.
"... Uhm... How about right here tomorrow?"
"Then it shall be." The robes of the mage floated along the wind, his legs looked so slender even with the long heavy armored boots. His eyes now looked so dark. "Do you trust in my guidance?"
That sure was a good question. Though the answer was quite obvious. "I'll see if you deserve it, Kuja."
It was the first time she called him by his name.
He even laughed with that subtle elegance. "With your senses sharp. That's how good women should be." She didn't know if to take it as an acomplishment. "Pride yourself over others at least, you haven't figured just how bright you shine."
The words were fallen ignored. "... I just hope I'm not mistaken about you."
"That depends on what you're thinking about me. You too. Surprise me next time we meet... And please, take care of not having anyone following you." He laughed for a last time, this time in a more melodious custom. "I'm off then."
She saw him part away, flying far and fast as if he didn't care about his white large robe around his waist being lifted by the naughty breeze. Of course, she hadn't time to care about that detail either.
Her mind already was occupied by the heavy hardships that would come after this pact with the silver haired gentleman. Surely there was something corrosive within his soul, it was tainted, but he... just didn't feel like an evil person. And she doubted it was only because of his chivalry habit.
His soul held cruelty, but not such thing as evil.
"... Kuja..." she whispered breathless, staring at a dusty sky. "What do you really want?"
A/N: I'll give you a cookie if you find MLP FiM references in this chapter. :P
Kuja's fashion sense is obviously an issue. Most of seemingly kinky thoughts aren't sexual in any way. This fact frightens even me.