Charles awoke from one of his unpleasant dreams. He cursed the memory that came along with it. His head hurted, the many voices seemed hard to bare. It didn't blend well with the several whiskey glasses he had drank the night before. He took a sharp breath, his eyes widened when a sickening voice rose out of many others. One he had been able to read clearer then whatever voice he had in the past.

Erik.

He hissed when Hank came running into the room. "Charles it's-"

"What the hell is Erik doing here." He groaned, he didn't want to see him. He shouldn't look for him. Hank walked towards his side, eyed him with care. Charles hadn't realised he had stopped breathing as soon as the other had walked into the room.

Charles tried not to laugh seeing the other. Hank must have beaten seven shades of Sunday out of him. "Did you enjoy catching up with Hank." He wasn't even going to hide his delight.

Erik wavered before walking in earning a glare from Hank and walked out of the door. Hank hadn't raised a finger towards himself. But Erik didn't plan to admit that fact yet. He took an eye in the man in front of him. How long had it been.

Too long.

Charles looked different, his hair was messier. He looked pale as if he hadn't slept for days. He noticed the whiskey glas. What happened to your disgusting tea.

Charles glared and spoke to him. "I grew tired of it." It pained Erik that his friend seemed so destructive, this wasn't how he remembered Charles to be. He told himself Charles had every right to feel angry, or even feel a sense of hatred towards him.

Erik knew when he dragged his feet to this very place he had hurt Charles in the worst possible way.

I am sorry.

The way Charles laughed when he didn't even spoke those words aloud, but in his mind was painful in many ways. As far as the telepath hated the other he didn't want any bloodstains on his carpet.

"Take some tissues if you need them, there on the desk." he tapped on the side of his bed and cursed himself for not telling Hank to get his wheelchair. He wasn't able to move.

Did Erik know he couldn't walk?

"What do you want Erik?" He barked at him.

No that he really gave a damn what Erik wanted, why should he? The man abandoned him bleeding and paralysed on a beach and took away his only true family, his sister with him.

No he didn't care about the man's motives, they normally caused pain for him, and him alone.

Erik eyed the other, feeling an emotion he knew far too well arise in the other. When Charles asked him what he needed he couldn't help but remember what Raven had told him: "Because he is the only one that could stop you from destroying yourself. Because he was the closest thing you loved after so many years of solitude."

Charles didn't need him, but Erik did. He needed him as a human needed air to breath. He felt the silence and the pain in the way the other looked at him.

"I shouldn't have left." The words escaped his lips. He wondered who of them both looked more fragile this very moment. Himself who was bleeding or Charles who's stunning blue eyes seemed dull and broken. He didn't know how he would find Charles, but not like this.

"There's a lot you shouldn't have done." He grabbed the last of remains of his whiskey, like hell he was having this conversation sober. He ran his hand through his hair, biting his lip in anger. "You've wasted your time coming here, I hope you at least know that!"

Erik crossed his arms, taking a note of the sudden change and started to smile. "Perhaps it could feel that way to you. But I would not think so lowly about yourself, my old friend." He stared at the other not even able to tear his gaze away. "Glad to see your pathetic attempt to protect yourself. I have missed you too." He admitted in a slight rage, he had returned and now Charles was pushing him away. He wouldn't allow it, not until he was sure he didn't mean anything to the other.

Charles threw the glass only a few inches of Erik's side cursed him when the other didn't even dodge. "I don't think lowly of myself, Erik." He snarked at the other and added: "You lost the right to call me that a long time ago, on a beach in Cuba."

Erik shook his head and took a step closer. "I am not letting you run away from this. You may have thought it would never be possible, but I intend to chase you until you either accept me or kill me whatever you wish. You said you knew everything about me Charles. A bit unfair don't you think when you hide behind locked doors and shut everyone off so you can't feel anymore pain."

"How can you know Erik. How can you possibly know my pain." The other started to choke, as if he couldn't breath.

Erik narrowed the distance. Charles used his fist in a pathetic attempt to hit him. He lacked strength, no he simply couldn't hurt the other. He could only hit him. "Who said I'm running. I can't even walk!" He screamed: "If anyone will leave it will you!"

"You act as if you know me so well." His tone was death, no emotion lingered any longer. It hadn't been there for a while.

Hank had told Erik that Charles couldn't walk, didn't accept any help from no one. He shook his head. "I wish I could agree, but no Charles I do not." He didn't know this Charles. And he couldn't explain why he pulled the other into his arms. This man was filled with bitterness and disgust. He was different from the friend he deeply loved before, the one that tore his heart apart when he left. But he was still the Charles he would return to, the one Raven had begged him to leave her for and return to where he belonged.

Charles needed to break from these arms. He wanted Erik to go, to not see him in this state. He cursed before he pushed himself to say the words that he could only imagine to break Erik in the worst way and push him out of his heart once and for all: "Did I even tell you that when you killed Shaw that I could feel everything he couldn't." He licked his dry lips a bit: "So you metaphorically speaking of course killed me too." His gaze met the other and he added with remorse in his voice: "But looking back on it I brought it on myself for trusting you."

Erik tightened his hold on the other. Charles didn't need to read his mind to see that his confession on murdering Shaw had probably caused the wanted effect. It tore him apart and Charles had every right to do so. Perhaps Charles was a fool for trusting him. "Charles I need to know did you have no effect of my disappearance? You hadn't thought about me once these many months we haven't spoken or seen each other. You never wanted to find me, thought about me once? Or did you gave up?" He looked at Charles showing much more emotion than the other knew he could portrait.

"I may have once or twice just wondering if you were locked up or dead." He shook his head. "I guess I gave up." He didn't want to look at him.

"You didn't truly gave up." Erik spoke and Charles cringed when he read Erik's mind. Of course that stupid board could give me away.

"I did not die, yet it was close of dying. I did not get imprisoned, I locked myself up." Erik held his hand and Charles was hit with a wave of memories.

'I won't let you die that easily Erik' He hears his sister voice and he started to get a clear image for why the man had looked this broken.

Erik planned to kill himself after killing Shaw. Raven went with him in order to keep Erik alive for his sake. He flinched when he saw Raven's methods. Taking away all metal and replacing it with wood. The only metal in his room being his silver coin and -

Charles eyes widened. "Are you an idiot, Erik." He hissed when he grabbed his jacket and took out the bullet out off his pocket. "You didn't." He looked at the other his facade falling when he held that object into his hand.

Erik looked at the other. "I swear I will not run away from you ever again."

Charles lost his fight, he must be an idiot for trusting Erik Lehnsherr.