The University of Oz
Chapter 3: The Slacker
The path winds through thick woods for what feels to Derek like hours. Apparently the people who attend this university don't mind walking several miles between classes. He takes a moment to rest on a large rock, ashamed that he can't even walk a few miles without becoming fatigued. While catching his breath, he starts to notice a pungent smell in the air. It sort of reminds him of the smell that comes from the stairwells of his dorm building, the smell that comes from locked bedrooms that are pulsing with the sound of psychedelic 70's rock, and the smell that comes from hidden off-road paths in the middle of the night. The hazy smog floating not far from him confirms his guess as to what the smell is.
He stands up and slowly walks towards the source, hoping to find another person so he can ask how much further he has to walk. Through the thick smog he begins to see the shape of a young man with baggy cargo pants and an equally baggy t-shirt. A beanie is fit loosely over his long, shaggy blonde hair. The young man doesn't notice him at first, but when Derek accidentally breaks a small twig under his cleats, the stranger gasps. He fumbles about, trying to conceal what he had just been doing, swearing and coughing as he drops a plastic bag, a wad of paper, and a glass object all over the ground. He swings at the air as if hoping to clear it of the smoke without Derek noticing.
"Uh…hi," says Derek, unsure of how to approach the stranger.
"I'm just on my way back, man. No trouble," says the stranger in between coughs.
"It's alright, I'm new here. I just need directions," replies Derek, hoping to gain the stranger's trust.
"Ahh man, I thought you were public safety! WHHEEEWWWWWWW," the young man says in relief. He then starts to chuckle a little as he gathers everything that fell.
"Nope. My name's Derek. I'm looking for the Professor of Romance. Any idea how far away she is?" asks Derek.
"Oh, man, yeah she's like, I don't know, like some ways that way," replies the young man as he points in the general direction of the road they're on. He continues, "if you just…keep walking, I think you'll get to her eventually. But hey man, you want a hit?" He raises the glass object up to Derek. "They call me the Slacker, by the way," he proclaims.
"Uh, no thanks," replies Derek. He had never tried smoking anything in his life, and he doesn't feel like starting now. In fact, he always avoided people like the Slacker because he assumed they were dull, unintelligent, and would just make fun of him for never doing drugs. However he doesn't get that feeling from this guy. He isn't sure if it's the smog around him or the friendliness of the Slacker, but Derek begins to feel relaxed.
"Anyway, I don't want to lose track of time so I'm gonna keep walking. Nice to meet you though," says Derek as he once again starts to walk.
"Wait, hold on man," says the Slacker before Derek can get too far. "Do you mind if I tag along?" he asks.
Derek doesn't think they have too much in common, but he figures it's better than walking alone through these dark woods.
"No, I don't mind. Any reason?" he asks.
"This professor, she's pretty good at like, just about anything dude, not just with relationships and what not. Rumor has it she can like, do anything. I've been meaning to see if she can help me. I need to like, I don't know man, kind of get motivated or something. I think I'm a pretty intelligent dude, but I'm still like, failing all my classes, man. I'm just not motivated. I haven't even gone to see her cause I'm just, you know, not motivated to do that and all," explains the Slacker.
"Fair enough, let's go!" responds Derek. The two of them continue down the road together. All along the way, the Slacker talks to Derek about countless mind-boggling philosophical concepts about the relationship between the Earth and space, the fabric of reality, and the flow of time. Derek had always thought that these slacker types always talked about nonsense, but he was intrigued. He could tell that underneath the apathetic, spaced-out exterior is a thoughtful and intelligent man who only needs a little motivation.
The two of them continue on. At this point the sun has gone down completely and the woods are practically pitch black. The fact that such a long, dark pathway would exist on a working college campus is puzzling to Derek, but he's just glad to have some company.