Sorry, I'm late. I had to finish the last chapter of this story in Italian...yep, the original version is almost over.
I leave you to read. Enjoy!
And do not forget to review, huh?
Chapter 3. Dumbledore Manor
It was dark. Dark all around. The darkness enveloped her clasping her in its warm dark cloak, protecting and reassuring her. She almost believed to feel its soft hands gently touching her cheeks and hair with slow strokes, she felt the warmth of its body, wrapping her like a shield of cotton, like a piece of the mantle of the night stolen and warmed by the sun. She heard a strange lullaby that sounded like an ancient ballad. She could hear those sweet words and the melody in her ears and felt them slowly permeating down and deeper, warming her inside, waking up, like little winged fairies, the flowers of the garden in her heart.
"Do not cry my Fiery Princess
I'm your Prince from the Night."
A warm and sweet voice was singing, whispering those words to her ears.
"Do not cry, it will be all right.
Let me be a kiss, let me be a caress. "
Lily felt someone's lips move close to the lobe of her ear, she felt his warm breath quivering in her hair of fire. Was she dead? They were the lips of an angel to sing so sweetly that fresh melody?
"I ride from the Shadow
I'm coming for you. "
The voice continued to sing. It seemed familiar to her, but it seemed also distant, as coming from a deep valley where the echo, running up and down the rock walls, distorted the voice of a solitary singing figure, a dark shadow who walked down the valley.
"Sweet daughter of the rainbow
Shining on the gates of blue. "
The song did not stop. Lily could now clearly feel loud and strong arms encircle her squeezing her gently... Did Death sang for his prey? Did he hug them that way? She had always thought that the fingers of the Great Reaper were bony and cold, but those that were touching gently her face were warm and soft. Were they the fingers of an angel? It was one of those heavenly spirits that was holding her in his wrapping, soft wings?
"From the Seas, I'm coming through,
Leaving the halls of my father. "
Yes, it really must be an angel. A consoling spirit sent from heaven to receive her in the fragrant gardens of paradise. And now he was holding her in a strong, but gently embrace… he seemed almost afraid to hold her more to himself, hardly daring to go beyond those little strokes that he left to run on her skin.
"I have repudiated His banner,
I was left alone with my madness..."
Unwittingly, she abandoned herself to the arms of her angel. She leaned on his chest listening to the hot beat of his heart that accompanied the notes and the words of the ballad. She wanted to open the eyes to see that ethereal creature, she wanted to look at his face, to see the eyes of her consoling angel ... but she was afraid to break the spell, she was afraid to know the reality. She felt a tear press traitor against her eyelids and escape their guard, rolling down her cheek. Could the dead cry?
"Don't cry my Brave Princess,
I'm your Prince from the Night. "
The angel sang and his fingers wiped away the hot tramp tear.
"Do not cry, it will be all right."
The voice whispered, while one hand caressed her cheek slowly blurring the wake of salt that the little sparkling star had left behind as the tail of a comet. The angel hold her tighter.
"Let me be a kiss, let me be a caress."
The creature's warm lips slowly brushed against her ear. Lily could not resist anymore. She opened her eyes.
A blinding white light burned her green irises slapping them angry. She felt a sharp pain in the chest and could not focus on the contours of her surroundings, the white light blindfold her eyes as jealous of the secrets it guarded. She blinked, trying to ward off the dazzling pesky fingers that were pushing her eyes to prevent her from seeing. The girl looked down and saw a dark spot around her waist, she feel its warmth through the fabric of her blouse. Was it the feathery angel's wing? She focused the image and knew to be wrong: it was not the wing, it was the arm of her keeper, wrapped in a black cloth.
"Good morning!" A hoarse voice said, just in front of her. She looked up and found two big brown eyes staring at her. They belonged to a wrinkled face with olive skin, lit by a broad smile and shining on to a long and pointed nose. Big ears were sticking out from the sides of that face, large and sharp, the edges and tip studded with sparkling white hairs. The creature wear on his head an Irish patchwork cap from which sprang, like rays of the moon, a few wisps of white hair on the sides, around the ears, and neck. He wore an elegant burgundy wool vest, decorated with Greek ocher frets around the shoulders and collar, and a white silk shirt. He sat quietly next to her and only then Lily realized to be on a bed, her legs hidden under a white sheet and a thick blanket of red satin, her back leaning against the warm breast of her angel.
She was not dead. Providing there were no beds and house elves in paradise ... but then, why should not there be? In any case, she stared at the magical creature for some analyzing him ... He was not the angel that sang that sweet ballad, it was not his the clear and warm voice that had touched her soul ... and then she still felt the warm body of her guardian against her back, she still felt the beating of his heart to come from deep in his chest.
"Good morning!" The elf repeated, smiling. He grasped her hand, freeing it from the heat of the body of her angel, and wrapped it with his slender fingers starting to shake it happily.
"I am Brix!- the elf said without stopping to shake Lily's hand. -And you are Lily, am I right? What a pleasure! What a pleasure!"
Lily continued to look at him confused, while the little creature continued to wiggle her hand up and down as if to turn it into butter.
"Enough, Brix. Let her breathe." A voice suddenly said behind her. It was the voice of her angel, Lily recognized it, but it was also the voice of someone who had not seen for three years, since leaving Hogwarts. Someone whose shadow had never stopped wander like a ghost in her dreams.
She saw the elf's eyes fall upon someone behind her.
"I apologize, young sir. –The elf said, leaving his grip on Lily's hand. -I go to prepare something to drink. Something strong. You agree, miss?" He then asked Lily, bringing his hazel eyes again on her.
Lily nodded; thought she could not speak, her throat felt blocked by the edge of the ice that her breath had become when she recognized the voice of the angel.
The elf widened his smile, jumped off the bed and disappeared through a on the left wall. Lily looked around: now she could clearly distinguish the outlines of the room around her. It was small, but warm and welcoming. The wood-paneled walls reflected the quivering light of the fire crackling merrily on the right side of the bed beyond a big round rug. Beside it, there was a large French window that opened onto a small balcony. Dark red curtains guarded the quiet white snowflakes falling beyond the glass. Opposite the bed there was a large bookcase in walnut, bulging with books, which filled more than the of the wall jostling with a closet.
Lily blinked, still not entirely accustomed to the light. She felt the man's chest behind her to rise and fall into a sigh. She moved slightly trying to turn towards him, but a strong spasm of pain in her chest forced her to give up.
"Do not meddle, Lily." The voice of the man said. Then she felt him loosen his embrace and move away from her. The angel placed her gently on the white pillows still soaked by the heat of his body and slowly left the bed. Lily saw him grab a chair, that stood near the bedside table, and turn it toward her.
Her angel had a face now. He was standing before her eyes, his fingers tight around the back of the chair watching her with those dark deep eyes that she knew so well. He smiled. But it was not a happy smile the one that reclined on his lips: the cold and sad light of his eyes distorted the smooth curve turning it into a broken zigzag line.
Lily kept looking at him, he seemed to come directly from one of her nightmares ... one of those nightmares in which she saw the boy who had been her best friend on the brink of a dark and endless precipice desperately clinging to her hand so as not to fall. Those in which she saw herself, hurt and in tears, let go and watch the boy fall into the void, swallowed by darkness. His dark figure had persecuted her for a long time... a lost soul, a black ghost who haunted silent through the storms of her dreams. But that young man who visited her dreams desperately did not smile. But the young man who desperately visited her dreams not smiling. In his deep eyes, filled with tears, she had seen bloody sketches of faults glimpsed. She had seen the ice fragments of his soul writhe in anguish trying to grab the hand of their comrades. She had seen the most absolute emptiness spying intrigued on her from those black irises… she had seen in those eyes a small dying flame, suffocated by the darkness, crying and howling her pain pointing an accusing finger at her.
Instead the young man who now stood before her was smiling, but his eyes reflected a deep and abiding sadness in his soul. He was there. Motionless. He watched her back as if waiting for her to say something ... waiting her to utter his name, as the magic word that opens a treasure chest full of questions and, perhaps, answers.
She looked at him. She was happy to discover that he was her angel ... she has always been glad to have him close. But then hatred and resentment had grabbed them both. She had dreamed of him and had desired to have him back, she had desired that everything return as when they were kids ... but the young man of her dreams accused her silently as he tried desperately a sign of friendship, of affection from. But in those traveling at night she had never understood ... She understood now, as she watched his black eyes waiting with bated breath for some, even minimal, even fleeting sign of acceptance.
Lily swallowed. "Severus ..." She whispered softly and faintly sand aw the boy's eyes light up as if struck by the quick and fleeting shot of the tail of a candle.
The hands of Severus loosened the grip on the chair. His breath was kidnapped when Lily's green eyes had met his. Those emerald irises had stretched their fingers triggering their hunting poachers in the wilderness inside him, and they had captured the air of his lungs and seized all the words that were resting placid in his throat, ready to be recalled from his lips, betrayed by a sudden flash of green. He had waited long for Lily to wake up ... and he had feared that moment. He had been afraid that the girl's thoughts and judgment hurl against him as had happened before, he feared not being accepted, of being become only a shadow among the many in the heart of Lily. Yet she had pronounced his name softly, as if she was glad to see him. He stood still for moment, in silence, letting their eyes embraced in an intricate network of green and black swirls, allowing his raven gendarmes freed his own words from the prison of the emerald robbers to bring them back to him.
Severus sighed, as he drew back his dark look to sit comfortably on the chair.
"How are you feeling?" He asked, straining the syllables- now back in his possession and still shaken by the sudden change of ownership- to raise to his lips.
"What ...?" Lily began, but Severus interrupted her, raising his hand in a gesture so similar to Dumbledore's.
"You don't remember anything?" He asked.
"No. I ... " Lily was confused. She looked away from Severus to point the gaze to the ceiling. What did she remember? A light ... yes, a blinding flash of white light ... an ... and a roar. She concentrated more on the snowy surface that she was staring at, immersing herself in it. She rushed inside it, crossing the glow that throbbed in her memories. She saw a black figure, wrapped in a long cloak approaching, breaking that light while it hissed away resentful against it ... then a laugh struck her ears injuring as many pins, a cold, evil laugh ... and a child ... a child was crying alone and lost in the blinding light ... the figure in black was looking for him ... Harry ...
"Harry." Lily murmured, as she felt the tears run down her cheeks.
"Harry." She said stronger parting the gaze from the ceiling to lay it back to Severus. He watched her in silence, he had feared that question ...
"Where is my son?" Lily looked at him with doe eyes covered by a wet veil of tears, a delicate and glistening bubble of grief.
And now? What could he answer? That he had abandoned him in the house along with the Dark Lord?
Severus was silent for moment looking thoughtfully ... maybe the best solution was to tell her what Dumbledore said to him.
"We do not know." He said slowly, his voice heavy listless in pushing the words out.
"But how ...? You ..." In Lily's mind smoke memories crashing as brackish waves, colliding with each other, mingling in a foggy welter of images and sounds. Then a memory overlapped the others, the misty rivers around him parted sharpening its edges. It was shortly before the explosion, Voldemort was pointing his wand against her. She looked at him defiantly while the first syllable of the Killing Curse hurt her ears ... but then the Dark Lord was suddenly interrupted when a figure cloaked in darkness pounced on him, hugging him hard and forced him to lower the wand. The man in black was struggling trying to grab it while the Dark Lord curses hurled left and right trying to hit the man who blocked him from the behind. Lily had remained motionless for a moment, puzzled by the sudden arrival of the man engulfed in the darkness of the Death Eaters. But she had thrown herself toward Harry, who was crying in his bed, to protect him from the spells darting in the air ... but she had never reached the child... Voldemort had get rid of the man who imprisoned him, throwing him to the ground while one of the vagabond curses struck Lily violently in the chest ... The girl had fallen to the ground bleeding ... the last thing she saw was been Voldemort's wand pointed against the black figure that lay at his feet. "You!" She had heard him exclaim surprise ... then a strong white light and the explosion.
It was Severus. Severus was that man, that Death Eater who came to help her without fear attacking his own master ... now she knew it.
"You ...- she murmured, turning to the young man -You ... you were ... you've saved us ..." The hope wrapped her. If Severus had saved her then, perhaps, her baby was alive. But then the words the young man had spoken just a moment before echoed in her head destroying every little cocoon of illusion inside her. We do not know. And while the last syllable of that echo was lost in her, the young man shook his head sadly.
"No, Lily...- He said, his voice calm but full of barely disguised grief -I saved you." Severus lowered his eyes, and Lily carefully watched him in silence, not daring to speak. I saved you ... I have saved you ... and Harry? Her little Harry? What had become of him?
The image of the boy dressed in black sitting in front of her slowly vanished ... now she only saw two smiling green eyes, like hers, in a cheerful little face; she saw her baby laughing, a laugh that expanded in the air around her penetrating in her tears and living in them, like little sparks of light-heartedness. But that vision slowly disappeared.
The door opened and Brix, the elf, came in carrying a silver tray with three glasses full of a brown liquid covered with a whitish layer that looked like whipped cream or foam.
"Here we are!" He exclaimed boldly, breaking up the networks of guilt and grief that enveloped the two lads, as he closed the door gently behind him.
"What are those long faces?" He asked when the eyes of the two boys fell upon him. He walked over to them, placing the tray on the nightstand. Lily made a movement determined to sit up, but Severus was quicker than her. He rose from his chair and helped her sit down by placing the pillows behind her back. Brix waited for Lily to be accommodated and Severus sat again before presenting them two warm glasses.
"Cheer up! A big glass of Irish coffee, and we will all feel better!" He said while snapping his fingers by displaying a second chair next to Severus. He sat on, the skinny hands clutching his glass.
Lily looked at her glass idly while her thoughts were elsewhere lost ... lost, along with Harry.
"Come, Miss Lily! – Brix's voice awoke her,-Drink! Alcohol was invented to forget the pain and bring the smile." Lily looked at the elf with the upper lip stained with cream and then Severus. And she smiled when she saw a slight sincere curve along the young man's face. She raised his glass to his lips and took a small sip of the dark liquid enjoying the warmth spread inside her driving away the icy ghosts that had snatched her earlier.
They stood in silence for a while, sipping the Irish coffee and letting it give comfort to their gloomy minds.
"What is this place?" Lily asked suddenly to Severus.
It was the elf to answer. "Miss Lily,- he said, - you're in the old Whitebeard's den." And he winked. The young woman looked confused and she shifted his gaze to Severus in a silent cry for help.
"You're at Dumbledore Manor, Lily. – The young man told her, laying for a second the half-empty glass on the nightstand. - The home of Albus Dumbledore ... "
"... And ours." Brix corrected him, indicating himself and the young man seated next to him.
Severus smiled. It seemed that the elf had the power to make him laugh, a power that not even she had had. When she managed to wring him a little smile, at school, she thought it was already a success. Instead, the smiles Severus gave to Brix were warm and sincere ... she had never seen him smile like that.
"Albus thought you would be safe here." The elf said.
"Safe?" Lily asked then.
"The Dark Lord will seek you, Lily. –Severus responded. –And me too. "
The Dark Lord ... he called him "the Dark Lord." Severus had saved her, it was true, but he remained a Death Eater. Nothing could change that. She had been so happy to see him that he she had not considered that little detail ... that her best friend had become one of them ... but then why was he living with Dumbledore? He was a faithful follower of Voldemort until the night before, so how could he be in that house?
"I'm not a Death Eater anymore. -The young man said suddenly, as if he had read her mind. -I am no longer one of them by a year. I went to Dumbledore for help, and he gave it to me. I did spy for him all this time ... I did not want to do ... I did not want to obey his orders ... no more ... " Severus shook his head and bowed it, while his voice was broken by the same blades that tore his soul. Lily looked stricken. She wanted to ask for more, but ...
"Do not make me talk about this, Lily. –Severus begged her getting up and looking at her. -Not now."
"So now Voldemort knows that you..." The girl began.
"No. He only knows that I kidnapped from his grip. He considers me a traitor ... and in fact I am."
"You are safe, as long as you're here.- Brix intervened -Nobody knows where you are. Just me, Albus and Minerva McGonagall. Not even Remus Lupin and Sirius Black know something ... and it's better this way. "
A lightning from a clear sky fell on Lily hearing those two names. James! What had become of her husband?
"Where's James?" She asked Severus.
He shook his head. "I have not arrived in time, I'm sorry ..."
"Liar!" Lily yelled.
Brix froze instantly. He did not expect such a violent reaction from the girl, and so Severus: the young man looked at her with a look somewhere between hurt and surprised.
"You always hated James! You let him kill him!" Lily continued.
"No." Severus tried to defend himself.
"You're be happy, right? The man you hated is dead! What more could you want? "Lily shouted, all the pain inside her had suddenly exploded. Her heart could no longer contain it and was now throwing up all the hatred on the boy beside her.
"Lily ..." Severus tried..
"You let him die! And you left my baby in the hands of that psycho, is not it?" Lily kept yelling.
"Lily ..."
"I hate you! What did you think to obtain saving me? Eh? Why did not you leave me there to die like you did with my son and my husband?"
"Lily, I did not want Potter die. Please, believe me!" Severus said, wounded and desperate, trying to calm Lily, to be understood by her.
"Liar!" Lily shouted back throwing the glass in her hand against the boy, with little strength in her body.
Severus raised his left arm to protect himself from the blow. The glass tapped against his forearm smearing the black sleeve with the last drops of whiskey left on the bottom.
"Lily, James had saved my life. Remember? I hated him, it's true ... but I never want him to die ... and I did not want to abandon your child, just ... I ... Lily ... " The young man now had tears in his eyes and could not speak. A cold knife penetrated his chest sinking more at every charge of Lily and he could not make a shield against them, perhaps because, deep down, he thought he deserved that.
"You're a horrible person, Severus!- The girl cried, giving the last painful lunge at the heart of the young. -Stay away from me! I don't want to see you again!" Lily sobbed in anger and pain.
Severus, bowed his head. He closed his eyes holding back painful tears in his eyelashes. He took a deep breath, then stood up in silence under Brix's sorry and saddened gaze. The elf was about to lay a hand on his arm to detain him, but Severus turned away from his touch.
The young man crossed the room in silence, he opened the door and went away quietly closing it behind him.