The Missing Hokage

03: Snake in the Grass

Sun set on the third day, and with it the council set their secondary plan into motion. There had been no sign of Uzumaki inside of Konoha in two days, and while it seemed possible, most of those involved felt it would be far too convenient if the Kyuubi-brat had died in the fire that burned his apartment complex to the ground. The problem with assigning a high-level assassination became apparent when the messenger they sent to find either a hunter-nin or ANBU returned with news that all of Konoha's highest ranked shinobi were out on missions and none of them were due back for at least a week. And forcing Jiraiya to assassinate his own student, while an amusing idea, was out of the question.

Danzou's suggestion to use Root was dismissed due to the probability of a team being spotted and thus incurring the wrath of an angry Hokage. The mission would have to be carried out with the utmost precision, strictly in-and-out with no witnesses. Were Tsunade to learn of Konoha's involvement, she would refuse to return. The reason at least a four-person team of Root ANBU would be required as opposed to a single ANBU or hunter-nin lie with Danzou and his paranoia of one of his tools turning against its master. To keep this from happening, all Root ninja were kept purposefully weaker than normal shinobi, all of them under a suggestive genjutsu to give them an aversion to too much training.

After several long minutes of silent thought on the subject and looking over the list of active shinobi currently inside the village, Koharu spoke hesitantly. "There is one person in Konoha aside from ANBU or hunter-nin that specializes in low-profile assassinations."

Glancing down at the list, Danzou frowned. "No. Absolutely not. I refuse to deal with that woman and her eccentricities."

Looking between his old teammate and the crippled war-hawk, Homura pondered the matter for a moment before a small smile slowly spread across his face. "No, Danzou, I must agree with Koharu on her suggestion. We won't have to put up with her for any longer than it takes to assign the mission and the benefits outweigh the short-term sacrifice."

"Not to mention that sending one of the thorns in Konoha's side to deal with the other has a certain sweet irony about it," Koharu smirked. "And as a bonus, if she fails and the Kyuubi-brat kills her, nothing of value to us is lost. It's a nearly perfect win-win scenario. The only way it could get any better would be if they both managed to kill each other."

Giving the idea a moment of consideration, Danzou nodded slowly, accepting their points as an idea occurred to him. "And if they do not, then we can take advantage of the other's weakened state and finish the job," he said. Looking towards the messenger, who was a Root ANBU himself, he nodded. "Summon her. When she leaves, shadow her. Do not let her become aware of your presence. Should she fail to kill the Kyuubi-brat, finish the job. And should she succeed, eliminate her."

"Hai, Danzou-sama," the messenger saluted, disappearing in a cloud of smoke to complete his assigned task.

Nearly fifteen minutes later, a kunoichi of medium height pushed open the door to the council chamber, her open brown trench-coat showing more skin than was acceptable by most standards through her fishnet-armor body suit. Her dark violet hair was pulled back into a spiked pony-tail and as her lips pulled the last ball of dango off the stick she'd brought in with her, she flicked it in the general direction of Danzou. "You had better have a damn good excuse for pulling me away from my meal," she growled.

"Mitarashi Anko," Koharu snapped, cutting Danzou off before he lost his temper. "We have a mission for you."

"What sort of mission?"

"Assassination," answered Homura.

"Who's the target?" she asked, somewhat more interested. Assassination missions were always fun, like her own personal game of hide-and-go-kill-someone.

"Uzumaki Naruto," Danzou answered, sliding a folder containing the boy's full profile across their table to Anko.

Hearing that name, Anko raised an eyebrow. 'So, this is it huh? Guess they finally decided to get rid of the kid. Let's see where this goes,' she thought. Outwardly, she showed no sign of her thoughts on the matter. "The Kyuubi-brat eh?" she asked nonchalantly, opening the file and looking it over to see what they had to say about the boy. "Says here he made chuunin," she mused aloud, trying to get a clearer picture of the situation. "Didn't think he was promoted after the last exam."

"He wasn't. Tsunade promoted him on her own authority without approval two days ago," Koharu pointed out.

Reading further down, Anko found something that actually surprised her. "'Released from the service of Konohagakure no Sato and Hi no Kuni and from all duties and obligations to the above?'" she read directly from the file. "What the hell?"

Homura snorted. "Tsunade's idea of a joke."

Anko continued reading. "'Pardoned for all crimes against Konohagakure no Sato and Hi no Kuni.' ...So why the hell am I being sent out? Are these orders even legal?"

Danzou frowned, shooting a dirty look towards Koharu and Homura, his expression screaming 'I told you so.' "Yes, they are legal and as you know, you may not refuse a mission. As for why we are ordering this, that is on a need-to-know basis—"

"Yeah, yeah, 'and I don't need to know.' Fucking blowhard," she said, mumbling the last part just loud enough for all three of them to hear. "Fine. As long as the pay's good, I'm in. But just so you know, I'm doing this under protest. I want that on the record, too."

Koharu nodded in exasperation. "It will be noted. Now, I believe you have a mission to carry out. While we understand that it may take some time to track the target down, we request this mission be carried out with utmost haste. Also, the target's companions must not become aware of your presence. I warn you, there is a high probability that there is a Hyuuga with them."

Anko nodded. "That makes tracking them easier and I know how to deal with Hyuuga, so it won't be a problem." That said, she left the council chamber, slamming the door behind her.

Danzou groaned, sinking deeper into his seat and bringing his single arm up to rub at his temples in an attempt at warding away his impending headache. "Gods, I hate that woman."

Anko finished packing what she felt she would need for this mission an sealed it all into a scroll, which she then pocketed. Pulling a laminated map book of the elemental nations down from a shelf, she sat down at her kitchen table and thumbed through its pages until she found the overall map for Fire Country. 'If I'm right, counting today it's been two, three days tops. They could have crossed any of our borders by now if they were moving fast, but with the kid with them I doubt they're hauling ass. Big-breasted hag likes to gamble, but with Shizune, the brat, and a Hyuuga to keep her in line she's probably being forced to avoid the gambling towns, or at least the parlors and casinos. With the Hyuuga there, there's no way they'll be ballsy enough to head up towards Kumo, and the kid looks too much like Yondaime for them to head towards Iwa.'

Anko paused in her thoughts to review the boy's file again. After a moment of looking it over, she looked back to the map. 'Naruto knows those Suna kids, but we're still on shaky ground with them. However, his mission reports from when he was on Scarecrow's team show the old man sent them out to Wave where they kicked some serious ass. And, coincidentally enough, Wave named their new bridge the Great Naruto Bridge. Real damn subtle. Guess they liked the kid, which makes that the most likely place they'd go to lay low until they can get their heads out of their asses and come up with a plan more complex than 'run around looking for paying work and hope we don't run into anyone from Konoha.' Closest town between here and there is... Otafuku Gai. It's risky, heading straight there. I could lose a day or two if I don't pick anything up within the first few hours. But if I'm right, I'll shave off over a day's travel by not dicking around following a false trail.'

After giving the matter some thought, Anko closed her map and put it in the pocket opposite her storage scroll. Standing, she bit her thumb and started sealing before slamming her hands palms down on the ground. The smoke of the summoning cleared, to reveal a thin black snake with a triangular head, roughly two feet long. "Come on up here," she said, holding out her hand to the animal. It complied, crawling its way up her sleeve and coming out through her collar, draping itself around her neck so its head hung over her left shoulder and could rotate far enough to see around the woman. The kunoichi smirked. 'The Hyuuga can see chakra, but most of my snakes can see heat. THAT's how you take care of that bullshit.'

"Well, let's go," she said, receiving a nod in answer as she left her apartment and made her way into the administration tower. She was stopped at the doors to the Hokage's office.

"Sorry Mitarashi, we think there was a bit of theft recently. Somebody made off with half our funds from the treasury and the entire contents of the Hokage's personal library. We found what looked like an official document signed and stamped by Hokage-sama releasing the items and money to herself, but without her here to verify it we can not be sure."

Anko nodded. "Whatever, just let me in. I'm on official business. I need to get some scents. You can watch if you want."

While the chuunin guard did not know her personally, he did know enough of her reputation to know that if she were there on 'official business' and it required getting a scent, then she was probably assigned to an assassination mission. "Sure," he agreed, opening the door for her and stepping inside with her.

"Do your thing," Anko told her summon.

After several minutes of walking around the office and letting the animal inspect the area, it turned its head towards her. "Several scents," it said, its voice surprisingly clear and, for lack of a better term, normal-sounding. It did not have the hissing lisp most people would associate with a snake if it could talk. "Two strong," it continued. "Both female. One old, one young. The old one likes sake... and napping in the office."

"Tsunade," Anko nodded.

"The younger one smells of... domesticated swine. Does she have a pet pig?"

"Yeah," Anko confirmed. "That'd be Shizune. Anything else stand out?"

The snake nodded, its tongue flicking out to taste the air occasionally. "Many newer scents, but only a few stand out. A man of two scents, he smells strongly of dog."

"Kakashi, sounds like. You might be getting the second scent off his Sharingan. Ignore him."

Tongue flicking out again, it continued. "An older man, as old as the sake-woman. Likes his sake too. Smells of toads, women, and paper."

"Jiraiya, ignore it. But you're looking for someone else that probably smells of toad."

"A boy, young, smells faintly of toad and strongly of ...fox. The Kyuubi-child?" it asked, its tone somewhat more respectful referring to the fox's container. After a moment, it added, "He carries with him an object of great power, I taste its presence in the air."

"Yeah, that's the one. Naruto," Anko nodded, turning to leave the room. "No idea what he's got with him." The snake's next words brought her up short for a moment.

"Wait, there is one more. A girl... of the white eyes. She smells of lavender and strongly of the Kyuubi-child."

Anko smirked as she left the office. "That's probably our Hyuuga. Keep an... a tongue, I suppose, out for her too. You got the four I want?"

"Yes."

Anko left the office and made her way to the south gate, having decided to circle the village clockwise to see if she could get a scent trail and then leave towards the east in the hope of cutting them off if they changed course. And if they had gone another direction, Anko would know where to start when she got back. As she circled from the south gate towards the west, her companion kept silent. It was at the north gate that the snake perked up.

"Two trails for the Kyuubi-child and his mate," the snake noted, causing Anko to stumble and turn her head to regard the animal on her shoulder.

"'Mate?' What the hell do you mean, 'mate?'"

The snake tilted its head to the left, which Anko interpreted as a shrug from something that didn't possess the shoulders for such an action. "She smells strongly of him, so I had assumed... I am mistaken?"

"Probably," Anko confirmed. "Maybe she's just wearing something of his."

The snake nodded. "It is possible," it conceded the point before continuing with its observations. "One of the trails is perhaps a day older. They came into the village with... A boy with a dog, a woman smelling faintly of cigarettes, and ...a hive."

"Team 8 and Kurenai. Ignore it."

Another tongue flick and the snake continued. "The newer trail is the group of four. They go north."

With that, Anko took off at a dead run around the east side of the village. Taking to the trees, she found the east road from the village and began tree-jumping parallel to it, towards Otafuku Gai. It was twelve long hours of chakra-assisted leaping and running broken once an hour with a five minute breather that Anko spotted the lights of Otafuku Gai, just as the horizon was beginning to lighten. She slowed her pace as she neared the village, descending from the trees and taking to the road at a steady jog. Nearing the village' west gate, she turned her attention towards her summon momentarily. "Anything?" she asked and smirked when she got a nod.

"A much fresher trail leading in," it answered quietly.

A voice from the gate interrupted her conversation with the snake. "Who goes there?"

Stepping into the dim light provided by a pair or torches above the gate, Anko flicked the headband on her forehead, getting a nod from the gate guards. "Seen a group come through here in the past couple of days?" she asked, then went on to specify before they pissed her off with a smartassed answer. "Three girls and a boy, all ninja. The oldest kunoichi probably stood out," she said, bringing her hands to her bust and emphasizing the size difference between herself and the sannin.

The guard who had stopped her shook his head, but the other nodded slowly. "I think I saw them a couple of days ago. Blond woman, had a hat and a green outfit I think, ginormous boobs?" he asked, getting a nod from Anko.

"Thanks. Know if they've left town yet?"

The obvious pervert shook his head. "Not a clue, sorry lady."

Nodding her thanks, Anko made her way through the gates and into town, following the snake's unspoken directions as it turned its head one way or the other to indicate a direction the scent trail went. The trail led her into the hotel and shopping district and a familiar clothing store that had just opened. A bell rang as Anko pushed her way through the door. Looking up from his counter, Dane spotted the woman's leaf-printed hitai-ate and the obvious summon riding her shoulder. "Help you find something?" he asked.

Anko ignored him. "Well?"

"They were here twice," the snake spoke, turning its head this way and that, tongue tasting the air. "No more than half a day between visits. Two trails exiting the building."

"Follow the newer one," Anko ordered, leaving the store and causing Dane to frown. After giving the woman a moment to get far enough from his store front, the older ninja pulled out a sheet of paper and a pen and wrote out a short message.

A snake follows you through the leaves.

Cutting a length of thick orange string from a nearby spool with a kunai, Dane bit his thumb and began sealing. Clapping his hands together, the written seals appeared in midair and a cloud of smoke in front of him announced the arrival of his summon. The smoke cleared to reveal a tall blueish-gray dog, who turned his head to observe Dane. "You rarely summon us any more," he accused.

Dane rolled his eyes and tied the note to the dog's collar with the string. "Sorry Coe, but you know I got out of that business after the war."

"I assume you have a job for me," Coe asked.

"Yeah. Put that nose of yours to work for me, would you? You're looking for a group of four that came in here a couple of days ago. Three kunoichi and a young shinobi."

Coe nodded. "I have them. ...Why does the boy smell of fox? I was unaware of a fox-summoning contract."

Dane bit his lip in thought. "Considering who he was with, I may have an idea or two, but it's not important. Now, smell that bitch that just came in here? Should have a snake with her." The dog's lip curled and he nodded. "Good. Avoid her. Find out where that group went and get that message to them before she gets to them. If they went towards the port and took a boat, you may have to lay low if she gets on the same boat."

"Understood. Anything else?" Coe asked. Receiving a negative, the dog pushed his way out the door to the store and took off down the street, nose to the ground.

"Hope he makes it in time," the retired ninja mumbled, settling back on his chair behind his counter.

Outside, Anko and her summon followed the scent trail to the edge of town, pausing at the gates. "They travel east. The trail is much stronger, their pace has slowed."

Yawning Anko nodded in satisfaction. "Good, that gives me some time to sleep. You can pick this up again in six hours or so?" she asked. Getting a nod in reply, Anko made her way back across the roofs towards the shopping district, never noticing the blue dog running below her in the opposite direction stop in its run and turn its head towards her before putting his nose back to the ground and continuing on.

Anko dropped down to street level and walked towards the first hotel she spotted. Her companion's tongue tasted the air for a moment before it spoke. "They were here."

Smirking, Anko rang the bell for service. An old man came out from the back room, the corner of an orange book peeking out from one pocket. Taking one look at her, he turned back towards the rack of keys and pulled one off, tossed it to her and walked back into his back room. "Thanks," Anko called, heading to the ground floor room she had been assigned. Opening the door, she was disturbed by the strange rasping sound that came from her summon. "What? ...Are you laughing?" she asked, receiving a nod in answer.

"Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of humor. They spent the night here," the snake explained as Anko started undressing.

Kicking off her sandals, Anko pulled off her trench coat and flung it onto one of the beds and immediately sat in the other. Reaching up, she pulled the snake out from around her neck and lowered it to the floor. "Think you can keep watch for a few hours? I don't care if you sleep, so long as you do it by the door. Bite the shit out of anyone that comes in."

The snake made its way across the carpeted floor, stopping in a dim pool of light coming from under one of the room's curtained windows. "I will wake you should that happen," the snake agreed, curling up on itself and closing its eyes, the pits in its snout flaring occasionally as its heat-sensing organs worked unconsciously, ready to strike should anything warm and vaguely human-shaped come into its field of view. Yawning deeply, Anko buried herself under the covers and passed out. And across town, a blueish-gray great dane with a rolled up note tied to its collar sped out the east exit of Otafuku Gai, disappearing into the underbrush beside the road, its natural coloration causing it to vanish in the shadows of the forest.

It was the afternoon of their third day since leaving Konoha. After camping out in the forest last night, the group had decided to pick up the pace that day and had made it into Fire Country's northern port city before noon, where they then caught a ship bound for port in Nagi Island, and after that to Haha Island where they would then take a smaller boat north to Taro Island. Stuck on a slow-moving ship with nothing surrounding them but water, Naruto was bored, which he let everyone know—loudly.

Tsunade rolled her eyes while Shizune set Tonton down from her lap and began digging through her bag. "Well I'm sorry brat, but as I've told you before, we can't do much training here. We can't practice taijutsu up on deck without getting in the way of everyone working, and none of the rest of us have the chakra required to sustain a prolonged spar on top of the sea. And I'm not letting you make a swarm of kage bunshin to practice out on the water, it'll draw too much unwanted attention."

"I got it the first time you told me," the blond boy grumbled. "It doesn't change the fact that I'm bored."

A small poof of smoke from the direction of Shizune drew their attention there, and Tsunade's first apprentice tossed a book towards Naruto. "Start reading that," she said, passing a similar book to Hinata. "They're books on basic anatomy. This should tide you over until we get to shore, and you need to read this stuff before you can start learning medical jutsu anyway."

"Ah! Wait a minute," Tsunade called, grabbing the attention of the other three. "Before you get to that, there's something else I would like you to do. I should have done this as soon as you accepted my offer of apprenticeship, but with everything going on it slipped my mind."

"Tsunade-shishou, you mean," Shizune questioned, not wanting to ruin her sensei's surprise for her two subordinate-apprentices.

Tsunade nodded, biting her thumb and sealing. Slapping her hands down on the ground, she was obscured in smoke for a moment, which cleared shortly to reveal a dog-sized... slug. A slug holding a large scroll wrapped in one of its eye-stalks. "I present to you the Slug Summoning Contract."

Hinata gasped—summoning contracts, especially those of the sannin—were one of the most valuable tools in a ninja's arsenal. Naruto... was less than impressed. "It's a slug," he deadpanned. Taking the shocked looks and silence of the three kunoichi as an invitation to continue, he did so. "Besides, I've already got a contract with the toads. Is it even possible to have more than one contract?"

"Yes Naruto, it is," Shizune answered. "Some people have as many as three or four. And despite their appearance, the slug contract is a very useful one to have."

"Really?" Naruto asked, warming up to the idea. If it didn't mean giving up his contract with the toads, then having another summoning contract—even something as ugly as slugs—would be useful. "How so?"

Shizune nodded. "Well, they... uh.. there are a lot of them, and they can get pretty large. And umm," Shizune shot a frantic glance at her mentor, for once completely at a loss for how to answer the boy's questions.

Tsunade shot her first apprentice a dirty look. "You aren't helping my case, Apprentice," Tsunade grumbled. Turning her attention back towards Naruto, she growled out, "AND YOU! You should be grateful I'm offering you the chance to sign a contract as exclusive as this!"

"Well, I guess so," Naruto nodded. "So long as it won't cancel my contract with the toads, I'm fine with it. But you still haven't answered my question."

"Perhaps I should, Tsunade-sama?" the slug holding the scroll suggested. Getting a nod from Tsunade, the creature turned its unoccupied eye stalk towards Naruto. "I am sure you have seen Tsunade-sama summon and use us before, so you know that along with the toads, we are most useful against those holding the snake summoning contract. Slugs have a variety of uses in the field. We can be used to transport the wounded, we are somewhat more resilient against physical damage, and we have a variety of attacks such as spitting acid."

"Acid huh?" Naruto asked. "Sure, I'm in."

The slug lowered its eye stalk and handed the scroll to Tsunade, who opened it and held it out towards her new apprentices. "Sign in blood."

Naruto bit his thumb and signed quickly while Hinata pricked hers with a kunai and delicately scrawled her name. Tsunade rolled the scroll up and handed it back to the slug, who then disappeared in another small cloud of smoke. "So how do I know which I'm summoning?" Naruto asked, showing a surprising amount of insight and restraint by asking first instead of just attempting the jutsu.

Shizune looked clueless, though Tsunade had some idea of how the process was supposed to go. "I think that to summon a specific species if you have more than one contract, you concentrate on calling just that species. If you verbalize the jutsu, use their name. It's the way Jiraiya summons when he wants a specific toad most of the time."

"So then Namekuji and Gama kuchiyose no jutsu?" the blond asked. Getting a nod, be bit his thumb but was stopped before he could begin sealing.

"Wait a second Naruto," Shizune interrupted before turning towards Hinata. "Do you know the seals?" she asked, and seeing Hinata shake her head, told Naruto, "Go slow so she can watch, and call them out as you do them."

Naruto nodded and did so, biting his thumb again as it had long since stopped bleeding. Slapping his hands down on the deck beneath him, he pumped about as much chakra as he used to call Gamakichi into the jutsu. A small cloud of smoke erupted in front of the boy and when it cleared there sat a small slug in front of them. "Congratulations," it said, waving an eye stalk towards the boy.

"Heh, thanks," the boy said, rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment. A moment later, he bit his thumb and performed the jutsu again, this time summoning a toad. Nodding to himself, he looked them both over for a moment before grinning and biting his thumb again. Slapping his hands down on the deck produced another cloud of smoke... along with both another toad and a slug. "Cool!" he shouted, gaining astonished looks from those around him. Both of the summons were about half the size of the ones he had summoned before, but he had been expecting that since he had used the same amount of chakra that he'd used the first two times. "Thanks guys, you can go," he said, waving to the summons who seemed to collectively shrug before vanishing in a larger cloud of smoke.

Once the trio of kunoichi got over their shock, Tsunade shot Hinata a grin. "Your turn, Hinata-chan. Keep in mind that Naruto has been doing this for a while, so it's ok if you don't get it the first time. It takes a while to get a feel for the amount of chakra needed to summon each size class or age of creature."

Nodding, Hinata pricked her thumb with her kunai again and started sealing. She performed all of the seals correctly and slapped her hands down onto the deck as Naruto and Tsunade had done before her. A very small cloud of smoke announced the arrival of a summon. When it cleared, a slug slightly larger than an average garden slug turned its tiny eye stalks to observe its summoner. Hinata frowned, wondering if she'd performed the jutsu incorrectly. And as she had come to expect of him, Naruto threw off her self-doubts the same way he always did. "Wow! That's great Hinata-chan," he laughed, picking the small slug up. "I didn't get anything the first day I tried, and I was stuck summoning tadpoles for nearly a week."

Seeing that it didn't seem to be needed any longer, the slug disappeared from the boy's hand in a poof of smoke. "Well done, Hinata-chan," Tsunade congratulated at the same time as Shizune. "Why don't you work on that for a while before starting on the anatomy stuff?" she suggested.

"I've got a better idea," Shizune grinned, looking between Hinata and Naruto. "Even with his initial disadvantage, Naruto-kun is going to quickly surpass you as long as he keeps using kage bunshin to learn. So, I have a proposition... How about we share techniques? Naruto, you can teach Hinata kage bunshin and share what you know about it with us, since you have the most experience with it. Hinata, you could help him with his chakra control exercises and help us to better understand the Byakugan and the Hyuuga style. Eventually, your father is going to send someone for you, and when he does we should be ready for it. Well, what do you say?"

The pair gave the idea a moment of thought before Naruto shrugged. "Sure, I don't mind helping Hinata-chan out, and I really could use the help with my chakra control. I could teach you the rasengan, but I don't know if I'm supposed to or not."

"We'll worry about that one later," Tsunade assured.

"I.. I would love to help Naruto-kun any way I can," Hinata agreed after assuring herself that the boy wasn't simply humoring her.

Naruto grinned, bringing his hands up and preparing to seal. "Ready?" he asked. Getting a nod from her, he slowly moved his fingers into the correct positions for each seal, finishing on the familiar cross-seal.

"Ano... I thought kage bunshin only required one seal?" Hinata asked as she and Naruto continued practicing.

The blond shook his head. "Nope. I just got tired of using so many at once."

"You know how to complete jutsu with less seals?" Shizune asked.

"Uh huh," Naruto nodded, then grinned at Hinata. "You slipped," he said, pointing out her incorrect seal.

"S-sorry."

Tsunade, following along with the lines of thought of the other two kunoichi asked, "When did you figure out how to do this?"

Naruto shrugged her question off, nearly sending him falling to the side as the ship hit a particularly large wave. "I dunno. What's the big deal about it anyway?"

"Naruto-kun," Hinata murmured, drawing his attention back to her. "That's a jonin-level skill," she pointed out, voicing the thoughts of the other two.

Shizune, as was becoming her habit, decided to elaborate. "Sealless, or partially-sealed jutsu is a high-level technique that takes years to master normally. About the only people I've ever heard of learning it that early are Yondaime, Kakashi, and Itachi."

Scratching the back of his head in embarrassment, Naruto laughed. "Eh, kage bunshin is supposed to be jonin-level too, but I do that all the time. I was just being lazy when I did that, I didn't think it was something important."

Tsunade sighed. "Naruto, nearly every innovation or invention made since the dawn of man has been due—either directly or indirectly—to laziness. Tools, the wheel, eating utensils—you name it and you can probably think of a way to attribute it to saving time, making something easier, or saving someone from doing a more labor or time intensive task if they did not have the tool or technique for the job. The next time you decide to be lazy and come up with something like this, let us know ok?"

It was after dark when a large blueish gray and black great dane sauntered tiredly into Fire Country's northern port city. Following the scent trail, Coe padded down the roads towards the docks. The scent trail he'd followed stopped at the side of one of the longer piers and he huffed, turning back towards the town. A flashing neon sign a short distance away drew his attention to a dock-side bar for sailors, called The Bad Fox. The dog smirked and loped lazily around to the back door.

Bringing a paw up, he scratched at the door and whined pitifully. He repeated this for a few moments before a pretty young girl opened the door and looked down, going instantly starry-eyed and nearly squealing in excitement at the 'cute doggy.' She shot a quick look back into the kitchen and winked at the dog, disappearing for a moment before returning with a pan of fried hamburger and a bowl filled with water, which she placed off to the side of the door. A voice from inside caused her to huff in annoyance and go back inside. Now along, Coe snickered and tucked into his meal. "Works every time," he laughed around a mouthful.

Finishing his meal, Coe made the short trip back over to the docks and sat down near a guardhouse. "God damn this is one boring job," a young man complained from within the small shack.

An older man's voice answered and Coe could hear the annoyance in his tone. "Just stay alert. Word has it, ships have been running afoul of trouble in the south. It could make its way up here."

"Yeah, but the next ship from down that way isn't due in until later tonight," the younger man pointed out. "Can't I just read or something until then?"

"No."

"Ah for fuck sake," the younger man groaned in boredom. After a moment he asked, "Where's the thing coming from anyway?"

The older hand sighed, coming to the realization that he would not be enjoying a nice, quiet night of doing nothing and getting paid for it. "Sea Country. That's where the trouble is. Comes up from there to Nagi Island then it'll berth here, resupply, and be out again on the same rout in the morning. If you're bitching about this job, just be thankful you don't have to do that one."

"Hey, you two!" a woman's voice called, startling Coe but not causing him to draw attention to himself. Whoever this woman was, she'd managed to sneak up on him, which did not bode well. A familiar scent drifted to his nose and Coe knew his luck had just run down the shitter. "I've got a couple of questions for you," Anko called, less loudly now that she was closer and had their attention.

"Yeah, what the hell do you want lady?" the younger guard asked, only to get slapped on the back of the head by the older man.

The old guard sighed, shaking his head. "Kids these days, got no respect and no damn common sense. I'm sorry about him miss. What would you ask of an old guard and a young guard?"

"Have you seen a group of four ninja leaving by this port in the last day or so?" she asked. "Three kunoichi and a young shinobi: a mis-proportioned blond, a black haired woman with a pet pig, a mousy little violet-haired girl, and a loudmouthed brat with blond hair and wearing lots of orange?"

"Nope, can't say that I have. Sorry. If they left through here, it was before our shift. I think I'd remember that group if I had seen them passing through," the older guard answered.

Sighing in frustration, Anko nodded. "Ok, then can you tell me where the ship leaving from that berth was headed?" she asked, pointing to the same pier Coe had followed the scents down a short while ago.

Checking his books, the older guard nodded. "Yep. She headed south out of here for Nagi Island and from there to Sea Country. Another ship bound for the same destination should be arriving later tonight. She leaves port tomorrow morning, around ten."

"Thanks," Anko nodded. "One last question: where can I get a drink and a room?"

The older man pointed back behind Anko, towards the partially hidden neon sign. "Bar up the road's got the best drinks on this side of town, good food too. There's a small inn beside it, got cheap rooms."

Turning towards the bar, Anko threw a wave over her shoulder. Once she was out of earshot, the younger guard finally opened his mouth again. "What was that about? And why'd you hit me?"

The older man sighed. "Son, I just saved your life. Show some appreciation."

"How do you figure that?"

"You see that thing hanging around her neck?" the older man asked.

The young guard shook his head. "No. What was it?"

The older man grinned. "Little black snake. Buggers are poisonous as all hell. That she has one as a pet should have been warning enough. You didn't see the headband did you?"

"Headband?"

"I'll take that as a no," the old guard nodded. "She's a ninja, kid. That snake was most likely a summon, and probably smarter than you are. From the look of it, she's had a hard couple of days on the road and is just itching for an excuse to stick a knife in somebody. You were volunteering. And while I don't like you, I don't particularly care to have to train a replacement either. No, kid, that is one lady you do not want to piss off."