"Hello Bella" he smiled warmly as we walked through the house. "It's nice to see you Jasper." The new, friendly vibes that he was giving off were slightly daunting to her as she followed him.

They walked through the house, the dusty surfaces and lack of warmth were painful reminders to Bella about the absence of the home owners. But there was too much that she had to find out from Jasper for her to get upset now. He glanced back at her with a wary eye, almost showing an inner conflict. The living room looked much more like usual, there were indentations in the sofas from where people had been sitting, and the pillows were assembled in a much more personal way; even the ash in the fire place was still glowing.

Jasper gestured towards the couch beside the fire place, and left the room, not before sending a wave of relaxation over her. Bella leant back against the couch, feeling safe for the first time in a too long. She looked up at the wall and noticed a number of photos that hadn't been there before, mostly of Alice but there were a few of the others too. Just in the corner, above Esme, was him. Bella let out a short gasp and Jasper came sprinting back into the room, nearly covering her with the food he had been preparing,
"Bella what's wrong?" his tone was unmistakably anxious as he followed her gaze to the picture. Without another word he put the food down beside her and travelled at lightning speed to the wall. He moved to take down the photo but Bella wouldn't let him, she jumped up, spilling the rice everywhere and dashed over, "No, I want to see him, I need to see him." After a deep look at her Jasper stepped back, out of the way and went to clean up the food, sighing slightly.

Bella stared up at the face from her dreams, but he was so different. The rings around his eyes looked so deep that they could have been permanent, his eyes were flat black; had it been any other Cullen then she would have been scared to look at it but she simply couldn't take her eyes off him. She reached up and stroked his face, amazed at how the cold glass felt so much like his own skin. Now, she knew what she wanted, she realised why she came here and had taken all the risks to do so, Bella still needed Edward. Jasper cleared his throat and knocked her out of the dream.

She sat back down on the couch and watched Jasper settle himself onto the adjacent seat. Finally he looked back at her, seeing that she was full of unanswered questions and realised that this was going to be harder than he had previously thought. For a few minutes they both just sat, unsure how to start and Bella grew more and more worried that the mask she was wearing would break and show how bad this truly was. Eventually, she began,

"Jasper, I'm a little confused to say the least, I never thought I would see you again and then suddenly you're right there in front of me. I realise that this must be quite hard for you as well but I need answers, I can't go on living like this, I simply can't survive. Obviously you've not come back with the others and I guess that's sensible, I could use a little more time if I have to get over.....him."

"Bella...." he paused and looked down at the floor, she'd never seen him this agitated. "I'm so sorry." he finally finished, looking up with heartbreaking eyes. Her broken soul took one look at him and let the first tear fall, she was spent.

She weeped for hours, as he carried on, he didn't really have any options. Though he had tried to soothe her, the grief was simply too much for her body to bear and he chose to just talk.

"Bella, I'm ashamed at what I have done, for so many reasons. I love you as much as the rest of my family by the way, and the self loathing I've experienced because of the last time we met has been eating me up inside. My brother, needless to say, was even worse. Edward chose to stay away from the family as much as possible, when he became too weak to keep up the pretense he would come home and sit in his room all day. We had all hoped that he would eventually move on. We all tried to not think about you but you were so huge to us." he paused a little hear, offering Bella a second box of tissues. "He couldn't forget you at all, one morning we found him outside at 3am, setting fire to the piano. Bella, he needed you so badly, I'd never felt someone in so much pain, that is, until now." he gestured to her own frail body. "It's clear that you've not been coping either; and to be perfectly honest, I had no idea what to do. When I saw you this morning, so close to the edge, I could feel that you had given up." With that he resigned himself to silence and slumped back against the couch, sighing in exhaustion and frustration.

Slowly, Bella regained control over herself and sat up, crossing her legs beneath her. Jasper opened his eyes and glanced at her as she cleared her throat.
"Jasper, I came here looking for all the answers, I wanted to really know why you came back, especially alone; but if I don't think that you really know either. About...him...well I think he probably needs more time to find his distractions and what not. Maybe if you take him on a hunting trip- "

"Bella he's not eating!" Jasper hissed getting to his feet, Bella cowered behind a pillow. "We don't know what to do! Even Carlisle's at his wit's end! I've come back to beg you to forgive us, I know that we shouldn't have made a fuss of your birthday, and our family has put you in so much dang-"

"Wait, Jasper, you want my forgiveness ?" Bella said, clearly completely and utterly confused. Hadn't they become bored of her? "I thought Ed-...he was bored of me, and you all hated babysitting me. I guess Alice leaving hurt a bit but then you all have distractions..." she muttered, remembering the intense abandonment she had felt that night, and for the rest of the year. "Jasper, you know I'm ready to give up, please don't give me false hope. If I have hope that comes to nothing, it would be the end of me.

"Bella, this was my fault, Edward loved you so much and I had to take him away from you"

"No! Jasper, don't blame yourself; it was his choice after all." Bella once more looked at the floor, knowing full well that Jasper could feel the tears falling but still clinging to enough dignity to hide them.

In what felt like slow motion he walked over to her frail body, but he paused behind her, struggling to know what to do. It was clear that her intense pain had brought back many of his human instincts. Ever so slowly he placed a cold hand on her shoulder, the closest he had ever been to her, or any human without lusting for their death.

This caught Bella by surprise and she shook for a second, before he sent calming vibes out to her. As they took effect Jasper took the plate of leftover food from her and returned it to the kitchen.

When he returned Bella had curled up into the foetal position, her eyelids drooping. He looked at the clock on the wall and gasped in dismay at what he saw. It was one Am. Charlie would be having a fit, the possibility of Bella telling him she was coming here was minimal at best. As her eyes flickered shut Jasper coughed loudly. She stood up abruptly, rubbing her eyes and reaching for her keys.

"I. . . I have to go" she stated, avoiding eye contact and holding an uncomfortable posture.
"Bella, it's one Am, what do you plan on saying?" Jasper queried, checking she had a plan and was awake before letting her drive. If he was the cause of her death this time Edward would pull his limbs off.

"I'll tell him that I went to Angela's and we got carried away watching movies. He won't mind. I don't think." she chewed on her lip, clearly unsure as to how he would actually react. Jasper sighed but followed her to her truck. He watched her get in and turn it around before driving up to him again.

"Uhm...thank you for tonight, it's...given me a lot of help." she said, whilst winding down her stiff window. As she went on to twist her hands on the steering wheel. It squeaked, only increasing the awkwardness of the moment. "and er..thanks for saving me today too."

"You're welcome Bella." Jasper's voice was cold yet sincere, he felt as awkward as she did. "Tomorrow's Sunday, right ?" he continued, "maybe you could come over again. I think I can finally fix this."
"Well I'm working in the morning but tomorow afternoon I'm free." she replied, still staring down at her squirming hands, as if she could make them stop by looking at them. Jasper gave a quick nod as she pulled away,
"Thanks for listening Bella" he mumbled, but her truck had already disappeared.

As he walked back into the house he took something out of his jacket pocket and dropped it on the small hall table.
It was a crisp white envelope that had, "dearest Bella" in a beautiful cursive lettering. Unmistakably Edward's.

AN - Hey, the next chapter might take a while to update because it's already been written but I can't actually get my hands on it. Anyway, here are some awesome songs that I used to help me write this one.

Slipped Away - Avril Lavingue
IN LOVING MEMORY - ALTERBRIDGE