The weather outside was picking up more than before, as the wind was blowing with force, threatening to knock down anything in its way. The rain was hitting hard against the roof which made it difficult for either one of the girls to sleep. Brooke had dozed off for a little while and woke up to the sound of banging on the bedroom window. She got out of bed and walked over to see what the noise was. She pulled the curtain back and saw a tree hitting against the glass. Figuring she wouldn't be able to get any more sleep with that sound, she grabbed a robe Peyton had left out for her, picked up a candle and walked over to the bedroom down the hall. She peeked her head through the doorway very quietly and noticed the bed was empty. She stood for a minute and thought where Peyton might be. It's not like she expected to be invited in or anything. She just felt this natural urge to check on Peyton to make sure she was okay. Brooke decided to go back to bed and try to at lest get some rest. She went back to Peyton's dad's room where she was staying and got comfortable under the covers. Lying there, her thoughts began to jumble in her head.
It was nice of Peyton to set the room up together, she thought. She didn't think she would even pay her any mind tonight, which she hasn't but the fact that Peyton did this kind of tugged at her heart strings. And it may seem small but, it's the little things. Brooke missed Peyton. Alot. This was hurting her just as much as it hurt Peyton. And Brooke was starting to believe it. She was starting to realize that this wasn't easy on Peyton. She does look torn about what happened, but maybe she doesn't know just how much. Brooke was starting to become antsy as she wondered where Peyton might be. I doubt she left the house, she thought. She debated for a second and decided to search the other rooms. Not like she could sleep anyway. Brooke got up, put on her robe and grabbed the candle, once again and headed downstairs. She checked both the living room and kitchen, then decided to take a peak outside. She opened the door and to her suprised, the blonde was sitting on the bench with a cup in her hands.
"Peyton?" The blonde turned her head and was surprised to see Brooke standing there. "What are you doing out here?" Brooke asked curiously.
"Couldn't really sleep." Peyton answered with a shrug. Brooke nodded and tighten the rob around her body. "Me neither." It was quiet for a moment as Brooke stood at the door way for a few seconds. She didn't know whether to go back inside or stay here but figured Peyton would rather be alone. She was about to turn around when suddenly Peyton spoke up. "Do you wanna sit?" Peyton looked up at her. "I made some hot cocoa. I"ll get you some." Peyton began to stand up.
"I got it, Peyton. It's okay. Sit." Brooke said, giving her a small smile. "I'll be right back." She turned around and stepped inside. She left the door open, and walked fast towards the kitchen. She grabbed a mug out of the cupboard and poured herself the hot liquid. As she stood at the counter, she couldn't help but smile as she thought of sitting outside, watching the rain with her once best friend. She headed back to the front door, taking her steps slow now. She began to feel this fluttering in her stomach. She was nervous. She walked out the door and took a seat next to Peyton. Peyton had a blanket laying over her legs, and opened it wider to lay across Brooke as well. "Thanks." Brooke said grateful for the warmth. Peyton smiled. And there they sat. Brooke took in the sight in front of her and began to notice how beautiful the rain really was. She took in a deep breath and felt relaxed for the first time tonight. The feeling between them wasn't hostile or angry. It was peaceful and calm. A comfortable silence washed over them.
"This is nice." Brooke said quietly. "Yeah..it is." Peyton answered. "I love the rain."
"I always hated it. Ruins my hair." Brooke said seriously, scrunching up her nose. Peyton laughed. "That's why they have umbrellas." Peyton stated. "Helps protect your hair."
"Yeah, but the humidity doesn't help either. It just turns your hair into one big fuzzy mess." Brooke said seriously. Peyton laughed again, and Brooke followed."
This felt normal. This is how it should be, Peyton thought. Peyton couldn't really sleep with the sounds of thunder and the rain so she decided she would sit outside for the storm. It was better than being locked up in the stuffy house. She was surprised to see Brooke up. And was even more surprised to see her in the doorway. She thought this could be a good chance to get things back on track, so she invited Brooke to stay. As the brunette sat down next to her, Peyton could feel the butterflies going crazy in her stomach. She couldn't help it if this woman made her nervous
"Do you remember 8th grade, cheer camp? I can't believe they had the nerve to put me, Brooke Davis on the bottom of the pyramid. God, I hated it." Brooke had become comfortable, with her feet curled up under her, and her body facing towards Peyton.
"I know. You bitched about it all summer." Peyton answered back, with slight laugh. Her legs were stretched out on the table in front of her, with her hands folded in her lap. "But now your cheer captain. Your on the top now."
"Yeah that is true." Brooke answered with a huge grin. Brooke looked over at Peyton, and couldn't help but feel sad. She missed the curly headed blonde. She couldn't help but stare at the woman in front of her, who seemed to be lost in her own thooughts. But little did she know, they were both thinking the same thing.
"I miss this." Peyton said quietly. She gave Brooke a quick glance. Brooke sat there and looked at her. "Yeah, me too." Brooke whispered.
"Do you think we'll ever get back to this. Like how we were before?" Peyton asked. Brooke looked ahead for a few seconds and waited to answer. She would love nothing more than to just forget everything that happened and move on. All she wanted right now, was to pull her friend into a hug and let things go back to the way they were. But when it comes down to it, she had been hurt by the one person who promised they never would. And sometimes, things just can't work out the way they want it too. She thought for a moment. And felt these words slip out of her mouth.
"I don't know Peyton." Brooke answered quietly. "I think.." she stopped. She hesitated." I think, like before is gone." Peyton stayed quiet for a moment. She didn't cry, or yell and argue. She just sat, and stared out into the night. She expected that answer. "Okay." was all she said. She began to think. She thought since, this was probably the last night they would spend together, she might as well let it go out with a bang. What did she have to lose? Nothing.
Both girls kept quiet, and the silence hung in the air. "Brooke..." Peyton said quietly. She kept her eye's forward, focusing on the rain. She tried to focus on anything other than the brunette, sitting by her side. She took a deep breath. Brooke turned to Peyton and studied her face. Peyton felt the eyes looking at her, as if burning through to her soul, but she didn't flinch.
"Do you believe in true love? I mean, do you think soulmates actually exist?" Peyton asked suddenly. Brooke looked confused. "Uhm, I don't know anymore. I used to think there was that one person for everyone. That people were meant to be together but now I'm not so sure." Brooke answered. "Why?" Peyton stayed silent for a second. She didn't know how she should tell Brooke that she loved her. How do you tell someone, and a straight someone, that you love them? Brooke interrupted her thought. "Peyton? What is it?" Brooke's heart started to race a little faster. "If your gonna tell me that you and Lucas are getting married, or that your pregnant or something, just say it already." Brooke said annoyed. She sat up straighter and stared at Peyton.
"I love you." Peyton blurted. She looked over at Brooke with fearful eye's and waited. "What?" Brooke replied, slightly confused. Peyton looked down, and began playing with her hands. "I..love you, Brooke." Peyton answered, more firmly. Brooke smiled a weak smile, and placed her hand on Peytons knee. "I know you do, honey. And I mean, I care about you too Peyton, but I just don't think us being friends is a good idea right now." Peyton scoffed at Brooke's statement and threw off the blanket laying on top her. She stood suddenly and felt these mix of emotions pulse threw her veins. "You don't get it do you? You don't have a clue?." Peyton said with anger. Brooke looked more confused than ever. "Peyton, what are you talking about?"
"I don't just love you as a friend, Brooke. Don't you understand? Can't you see it?" Peyton began shaking a bit, as her voice cracked on the last word. She looked into Brooke's brown eye's and waited for it to click. Brooke stared back into Peyton's eye's and realized what she meant. Brooke didn't know how to answer. "What are you saying, Peyton." Brooke said carefully.
"I'm IN love with you, Brooke. I always have been." Peyton said. She let out a long breath. She'd been waiting to say these words for a while, so it finally felt good to say it outloud, and it wasn't even over. Brooke began to speak. "How- I mean, when did..".
"Let me just get this out. please." Peyton interrupted. She looked over her shoulder to the street and saw the rain at it's steady pace. She took in a deep breath and continued. "How long have we known eachother? Almost 17 years? Our whole lives basically? It took me all that time to realize that I love you. It took you hating me to final see it. And there's been this huge weight on my shoulders after what I did to you and it just became heavier and heavier. And I can't hold it in anymore. It's killing me." Peyton caught her breath, and relaxed. "I'm in love with you, Brooke. And I think I've always known. I know it's always been there, but I just had to find myself, so that I can come to realize it." She took another breath. "And I know nothing will come of this. I know you don't want to be friends. I get it. " She looked down, avoiding these brown eyes. "If that's what you want, then after tonight, I will walk away and you will never hear from me again." She paused for a second. She held herself together as much as she could. Last thing she wanted to do was fall apart. She took a breath and continued. "I just needed you to know. I just needed to be honest you." Peyton said in a small voice. She looked down at Brooke, who's mouth hung open in shock. Brooke's eye's began to blink fast and she looked around as if trying to find the right words to say. "Peyton..."
"I'd rather you not say anything." Peyton said with a small smile. "I don't think I can handle it right now." she laughed a little. She took one last look at the rain, grabbed her cup and walked back inside, leaving Brooke alone. Brooke sat there confused as to what happened, and didn't know what to do. She wanted answers. She needed to know more. Brooke threw the blanket aside and walked into the house. She stood for a moment, and saw the shadow's of light coming from the kitchen. Brooke walked down the hall and saw Peyton standing at the sink.
"Peyton." Brooke said. "You can't just leave it like that." Peyton stopped what she was doing. "Yes, I can." she answered back.
"No. You can't do that to me. I wanna talk about this." Brooke pleaded. This was something she couldn't let go. Peyton kept her back towards Brooke, but spoke as clear as she could. "Brooke, it's done. The subject is closed. I just wanted to let you know."
Brooke began to get angry. She had enough of Peyton running from every problem or confrontation they have. "You don't just tell someone you love them, and run away. I ACTUALLY wanna talk to you about something, without the yelling or fighting. Why can't we just talk, Peyton? What are you so afraid of?."
"That should be obvious."
"God, Peyton why must you be such a baby about everything? Why won't you give me a chance? Stop being so scared all the time. Do you think I'm gonna be angry over that?." Brooke started to raise her voice now. All this anger began piling up inside her, and in one instant it fell out of her mouth. "I'm not angry at who you are, I'm angry at what you've done to me." Peyton turned around at this point and focused on the girl in front of her.
"But you never gave me a chance either, Brooke. You never let me tell you my side. I wanted to talk to you about it so many times, and you just blew me off."
"Why do you think I did? Why can't you understand that I didn't wanna talk to the girl who betrayed me?" Brooke's voice cracked. She put her hand to her mouth, and tried to blink any tears that were gonna fall. Peyton dropped her head and looked to the floor.
"Brooke, this is hopeless. It's not going anywhere. That's why I don't wanna talk about it." Peyton said. Brooke looked over at Peyton and stared. She nodded her head, a silent agreement. "Okay." was all she said. "But I get to walk away this time. Not you." Brooke walked out of the kitchen and headed up to the bedroom, every step causing her to cry a little more.
Peyton looked around, tears threatening to fall. She looked up to the ceiling. "Why can't this just work? Why can't we just get through this?" She said to the empty room. She sat at the kitchen table and put her head down. She layed her head on the cool surface, hoping it would help her headache. This night did not work the way she wanted it too. It hurt's to know that the girl you love doesn't love you back, and even worse to know that they don't even want you in their life. But Peyton didn't expect Brooke to actually want to talk about her confession. She thought of the worse possibilites to happen afterwards. Maybe some yelling, and cursing. Or her leaving. But Brooke had stood in front of her, begging to talk about it. Begging for some answers. And considering everything thats happened between them, Peyton would be the last person Brooke would be pleading to for a talk. Peyton groaned at the thought and lifted her head. She had to fix this somehow. It must mean something if she wants to hear me out about this, she thought.
Peyton stood, grabbed the flashlight and began heading up to see Brooke. Before she reached the stairs, a loud boom cracked outside. After a few seconds it happened again, and a loud crash followed. Peyton went to the front door and opened it to find nothing. She walked further outside into the rain, and walked down the few steps that led to the front yard. She blinked up and saw this tree had fallen onto the roof of the porch. The top part of the tree was completely covering this small, fragile roof, and it looked like it would give way at any second. Peyton looked around, up and down the street but noticed it was completely dead. No one would come out in this, she thought.
"Peyton?" Brooke called from the front door. "What happened?" she asked confused. Brooke had heard the crash from inside the bedroom, and hurried down to make sure Peyton was okay.
"Brooke, don't come out here, go back inside, okay?" Peyton yelled frantically. "Just don't come outside."
"What? I can't hear you?" Brooke yelled out as stepped towards the end of the sound of the rain and thunder made it impossible to hear anything. Peyton kept looking back and forth between Brooke and the tree. Just then there were sounds of cracking coming from the roof. "Brooke, go!" Peyton yelled while running back onto the porch. The minute Peyton hit the porch, part's of the roof starting shattering down, planks of wood were falling from every point from above, with branches following behind. Peyton grabbed Brooke, pushed her into the doorway, and in one instant the whole tree came crashing down before them. Both girls had fallen to the floor, as pieces from the wreck shattered inside.
Peyton uncovered her head and coughed at the dust began filling up the room. She quickly moved over to Brooke. "Brooke? Are you okay?" Brooke moved from under her arm and looked up at her surroundings, and nodded up at Peyton. Peyton got up and tried walking as far onto the porch as she could, which wasn't very far. Branches and pieces of wood covered every inch of the floor, and the debris reached up to Peytons knee's. "This isn't good." Peyton said. She looked over at Brooke who was still stting on the floor staring outside. Peyton walked over and helped her up. "Are you okay?" Peyton looked in Brooke's face, making sure there were no cuts. "Are you hurt?" Brooke shook her head no. Brooke reached up, and touched Peyton's forehead where a gash was starting to bleed. Peyton winced. "Come, I'll clean it." Brooke said and grabbed Peyton's hand. They walked to the kitchen, and Brooke grabbed the first aid kit, sitting under the sink while Peyton sat down at the table.
"I'll try calling Haley. Maybe her and Nathan can come and get us." Peyton picked up her cell phone and tried dialing, but couldn't get a signal. "Do you have your phone?" she asked Brooke, who shook her head no. She came to the table and began cleaning Peyton's wound. "Owww." Peyton yelled.
"Don't be a baby." Brooke laughed. "Hold still." Brooke wiped all the blood and dirt, as Peyton winced at every touch. Her mind began to wander elsewhere, as she realized how close Brooke had become, feeling the heat radiate off her body.
"Thanks for what you did back there." Brooke said, pulling Peyton back to reality. "For pushing me out of the way. I can't imagine what would have happened if you didn't." Brooke said, her voice becoming softer. Peyton looked up at Brooke, eyebrows raised. "Of course, Brooke. I wouldn't let anything happen to you." Peyton reached up and grabbed Brooke's hand. Brooke looked away from what she was doing and looked down at Peyton. This look of worry, and love that was coming from Peyton's eye's made Brooke want to melt into her arms right there. Peyton gave one last squeeze, and pulled away. Brooke smiled a little and went back to cleaning the wound. "All done." Brooke said as she put on the bandaid.
"Thanks." Peyton smiled up to Brooke. They held each others gaze for a few seconds as Peyton looked away. "So, I guess I'll call someone in the morning. There's really nothing else to do." Peyton gave a Brooke a sideways glance. She wasn't sure how Brooke was feeling at this point, but she wanted to keep the mood light. "Too bad the service's out." Peyton said as she got up from the chair and threw out the bloody tissues.
"I'm sorry." Brooke said suddenly. Peyton turned around. "What?" said Peyton.
"I'm sorry that I've been so cold to you. I'm sorry I never let you talk to me or even explain your side of what happened with Lucas. I should have.." Brooke began babbling. Peyton didn't know where this was coming from, she put her hand up as if signaling Brooke to stop. "Brooke, I don't understand..."
"I can't stop thinking about what you said. About how I never gave you a chance? I should have. I should have let you tell me why you did what you did. If I had asked, maybe we wouldn't be fighting all the time. But I was so hurt by you. I wasn't even angry, I was so..." Brooke stopped to find the right words to say. "...heartbroken. And not even by Lucas. By you."
"Brooke, I get it. I do. I understand why you didn't want to, and honestly I don't blame you. At all."
"But you tried so hard. You tried so hard to just show me how sorry you were. You even came to my house and apologized but that turn to be a disaster." Brooke looked away at this point. She didn't know where all this was coming from but it felt good to let it out. There was something building up inside of Brooke, and she need to get it out.
"Brooke, stop apologizing." Peyton said, with a little laugh. "I'm the one who should be saying sorry. You didn't do anything. " Peyton looked at Brooke with a reassuring smile. Brooke looked down at her hands, not sure of what to say. She was feeling vulnerable, and rarely ever showed this side of her. She felt her eyes gloss over, and turned around. "Brooke?" Peyton walked over and place her hand on Brooke's shoulder. "What is it?" Peyton's pulse began to race a bit as she began to feel nervous. Brooke wiped her cheek, and took a breath.
"I just.." She paused."...I miss you..." She said. Peyton looked confused, and took her hand off Brooke's shoulder. "Do you, though?" Peyton asked. "Cause, I'm not so sure." Brooke turn around suddenly, cheeks wet from tears and looked at Peyton.
"Of course I miss you. I may be mad but that doesn't mean I don't miss you. Everyday I wake up and your the first person I think of. Your the person I want to talk to. Do you know how hard it is to see you at school? I mean, there hasn't been a day that goes by where I don't.." She stopped suddenly. She didn't mean to be spilling her guts like this, but everything was slipping out so quickly. She looked at Peyton's hopeful eye's, listening intently.
Brooke felt this rush of courage run through her body. She took a deep breath." There isn't a day that goes by, where I don't think of you. Cause I do, Peyton. Every second of everyday, you're all I think about. And I don't know why." Brooke threw her hands up and turned away, walking to the other side of the room. "I don't know why I think of you the way I do, but I can't help it. And It's crazy. And it's not just recently, Peyton. It's been always. Since before Lucas." By now Peyton's mouth dropped open. She didn't understand what was happening or what to do. So she just stood and watched as Brooke paced the room in the dim light. Brooke stopped and looked at Peyton. She walked over, and stood inches away from the blonde.
"I don't get it." Brooke said. "I don't get this thing you have over me." She looked in to Peyton's eye's and felt tingles run through her body. "But you do." She whispered with her raspy voice, and began leaning into Peyton. She wasn't sure where this came from, or didn't even know what she was doing. She stopped midway and straightened up. "I'm sorry. I don't know.." She paused. "I need to be alone, I'm sorry." She said, not looking Peyton in the eyes. She walked out of the kitchen leaving Peyton standing in the middle of the dim kitchen, confused as ever.
What the hell, she thought. Peyton sat down at the table and tried to process what just happened. Well, almost happened. She almost kissed me, Peyton said to herself. She was gonna kiss me. It was hard for her to wrap her head around any of this. Brooke wanted to kiss me she thought, but why? Could it really be possible that Brooke does feel the same way? It sure seemed like it. But, still it was hard to be sure, considering everything that had happened. Peyton contemplated her next move. She wanted to talk to Brooke. She needed to know what this thing was between them, cause it was something. That was obvious. She slowly found her way out of the kitchen and took her time heading upstairs, passing by the front door, and taking a peek outside. The rain hadn't calmed down, and was pounding down on the pavement. She climbed the steps, and walked to her fathers bedroom where the brunette had been staying. She looked itn but saw no one there. She headed to her room down the hall and slowly peeked her head in. There was Brooke, sitting on the floor in the closet looking through a scrapbook they had put together. It was their book. Pictures, and letters, dating back to 6th grade and ending up to a few months ago, before they're fight. Peyton walked in and placed herself next to Brooke on the floor.
"Do you remember when we first started this?" Brooke spoke quietly, still looking at the pages.
"Of course I do. It was one of my favorite days with you." Peyton looked over at Brooke, who was staring back at her. "It snowed and school was cancelled so you came over. We layed out all of our pictures over my floor, and started gluing them to pages. I remember glitter being involved, which didn't end well." They shared a laugh, and Brooke placed her head on Peytons shoulder. Peyton continued. "I remember after sticking all the pictures on, somehow we ended up building a fort in the living room with tons of blankets. My mom gave us flashlights and made us hot chocolate, and we stayed up all night watching movies, and just talking. It was amazing." Peyton looked down at the scrapbook. All these memories these girls shared together were burned in her brain, like just speaking about it, made it seem like it was just yesterday where they snuggled in their fort.
"The world didn't exist to me when we were in there. It was only you." Brooke said quietly. She traced her finger across one of the pictures of the two girls.
"Brooke.." Peyton began. "What was that downstairs?" She looked at Brooke half expecting her to shrug the whole thing off. But a part of her was hoping there was something there. That they're was chance for them. Brooke took a dew moments before speaking. "I don't know." She said unsure.
"Brooke." Peyton said in annoyed. "Why can't you just tell me?"
"Because I don't want to."
"Weren't you the one who told me to stop being scared when I told you I loved you." Peyton said. She said it strongly, like she wasn't scared anymore. She didn't care. Peyton loved Brooke, and now it was her turn for answers.
Brooke stayed quiet, just staring down at the closed book. Peyton groaned and stood up. "Why are you doing this? Why are you torturing me?" She yelled. "It's because of me and Lucas, isn't it?" She ran her hand through her hair in frustration and looked down at the brunette on the floor. "Wow." Peyton gave a cold laugh. "Your unbelievable, you know that? I'm not doing this cat and mouse thing anymore with you, Brooke."
"I don't know what you're talking about." Brooke said in a flat tone. She gave a quick glance to Peyton, and sat the book down on the floor. Peyton stayed for a few seconds, watching Brooke play with her hands, paying her no mind.
"You know what, screw this. I'm outta here." Peyton grabbed her coat and headed for the door.
"Where are you going?" Brooke called after her. Peyton stopped and turned. "Away from you." And she left. Brooke heard the front door slam shut. She put her head in her hands, and couldn't control the tears that were already falling. I can't believe this.