Here comes another chapter. My comedic attempts seemed to have made a few people laugh or smile. That's good. Hope this story makes more people laugh. Though I don't think it's AS funny, but it is random. But that's my opinion.

Chapter 3:

Jin sat down on a bench in a rather lively park, lost in thought on a certain someone, that someone being none other then his brother, Ragna. He had been spending less and less time with him, given that Izanami has been chasing him down or he's just been talking with other people. It irritated him and all he wanted was his brother back, and he would do anything to get him back.

"I know what I must do." The blond haired man stood up and made his way out of the park to his destination, determination in his eyes. Walking up to the higher levels of the city and into the Yabiko branch, he goes into Kagura's office and heads down to Kokonoe's lab. For some odd reason she still decided to stay, saying it was comfortable and she could be closer to, Ragna. Whatever that meant, he really didn't care. Finally reaching the scientist in question, he tells her what he wanted and she stared blankly at him.

"Are… Are you serious?" The pink haired beastkin rubbed her temples and shook her head. "Why the hell would you want that?"

"It is the only way. Now can you help me or not?" Jin asked.

"I could…but…" Kokonoe trailed off.

"But what? Hurry up, Kokonoe. I need it, now." He demanded.

"Oh shut the fuck up before I say no." Kokonoe snarled and motioned her hand for him to follow her. She leads him into another room with a bunch of gadgets and gizmos lying around. There was one hidden under a white blanket as she removed it to show it off. "This should do it. So…do you have his DNA?"

"Of course," Jin took out strands of sliver hair and a vial. "Should this do it?"

"Hair and saliva…? How in the hell did you even…?"

"I know my brother better then he knows himself. No enough questions. Let's get moving."

"Ragna, what's the matter? Are you ok?" Noel asked the groaning man laying his head on her lap. The two sat in on a park bench after roaming around town for a bit, taking a short break and eating some ice cream. Noel couldn't help, but notice how tired he seemed, and it wasn't because of them walking around. "You seem out of it."

"I am… Izanami chased me down this morning... At least I can have some peace and quiet with you around, Noel." Ragna sighed and looked up to her. "Speaking of which…are you…ok? You…"

"O-Oh I'm fine… But let's not talk about it!" Noel blushed.

"Right… Sorry for…bringing it up." Ragna rose up from her lap as his body shivered. Noel saw the worry that took form on his features and asked.

"Are you sure everything ok?"

"I don't know… I feel…a disturbance…" Ragna squinted his eyes. "Somethings…something is coming… And it ain't good." The platinum haired man turned to Noel and asked. "So how's Nu, and Lambda? They ok?"

"Actually, yes! Nu is all better now after what happened." Noel said.

"That's good. Well," Ragna got off the bench and stood up. "I'm gonna head back to the branch. Can't stay out for too long…" With a grunt he stretched his limbs. "I think, Makoto wanted you a while ago… She called while you were in the store."

"Really!? When!?" Noel asked in worry.

"About five minutes ago. Don't worry, I'm sure you can still catch her. She said she would be in the shopping district." Ragna said.

"Ok," Noel quickly got up. "Thanks, Ragna! I've gotta go!" The blond quickly ran away, leaving dust in her wake. He just chuckled and went off to the branch. Thankfully, Izanami was no where to be found so he was in the clear, but still, he couldn't be too lax. Anything could happen, and that chill he felt didn't help. He ran the rest of the way to the branch and got there in no time, sighing at his safe return.

"Well…that running made me hungry." Ragna rubbed his stomach and went to the kitchen to see food already prepared, courtesy of Hibiki. He quickly took some food and gobbled it down, letting out a satisfied sigh as he rubbed his now full belly. "Shit that was tasty."

"Ah, brother. There you are."

"Hm?" Ragna heard a familiar voice call his name. He turned to the source of the familiarity and saw a smiling, Jin walking towards him. The first thing that ran through Ragna's head was that, he was smiling? The second thing was, where was he all day?

"I have been looking for you, brother. I need you to look at this." Jin held up a small device and set it on the table.

"Is that a pregnancy test? And… Holy shit!" He gasped wide eyed as it said it was positive. "It's positive!? Is, Tsubaki pregnant!?"

"No, she is not."

"Wait so then…actually, where did you come from?" Ragna asked.

"Kokonoe."

"So SHE'S pregnant!? Oh no…! Then that means I'm—!" Ragna gasped.

"No she is not…"

"Oh thank god… So I didn't fuck up… Phew." Ragna sighed in relief.

"You are going down the line. And I shall stop you when you are incorrect." Jin said with a smile.

"So NOEL!?" Ragna gasped. "Oh crap… I knew it…!"

"You are getting warmer…" Jin smirked as a few suspicious coughs left him.

"What…? Wait…" Ragna got up and looked at him with suspicious slits. "What have you done…?"

"I think you mean what have 'WE' done." Jin exclaimed.

"Huh?"

"Brother… We're pregnant!"

"WHAT!?"

"And in eighteen years he's going to move away!" Jin said in tears.

"How the hell…!? Wait this doesn't make any sense!" Ragna started to pace around, grabbing his hair as his heartbeat skyrocketed. "How we…!? What!?"

"It is quite simple really," Jin started as a nervous Ragna focused his attention back on Jin. "I took some samples of your DNA and asked Kokonoe to form a temporary uterus inside me. Then, she injected it into me, and now…!" Jin smiled.

"Oh HELL now! Get rid of it!"

"Get RID of it? Just say it… I want you to say it, brother."

"Abortion! I want you to get a big fat fucking abortion!" Ragna demanded.

"You can't even say it…"

"Oh god," Ragna holds his mouth and gags. "I think I'm gonna throw up. Now people are gonna think I had sex with a man! And my brother of all things!"

"Enough with the theatrics. Our baby is growing within me!" Jin held his stomach. "Am I nothing to you!? This is real life! You did this to me! You need to take responsibility! Am I just some whore!? Well this whore has your baby!"

"Stop talking like that!"

"I thought you would be happy. I mean, I am kind of good looking. I mean…not kind of… At least I can be a runway model. You know what? Why must I degrade myself of how good looking I am? You know what? I'm sick of it. I am a very attractive man and—Gah!" Jin gasps as a fist struck his stomach.

"Is…is it dead?" Ragna asked.

"You…You struck me!" Jin gasped. "If you EVER lay a hand on me again I shall burn you in your bed and feed you to the Black Beast!" Jin said sharply as he walked out.

"Could…could you do that now?" Ragna begged, but got no response. With a sigh, he hung his head down and groaned. "Noel… I'm begging you…don't make me go through this twice…"

A week later…

Ragna was in the kitchen, eating and sighing with every bit. "This is just perfect… And I thought the main story was gonna kill me…"

"Brother, I need some help."

"What is it now Ji—What…?" Ragna dropped his fork as he looked to see Jin's stomach was enlarged. "My god, how far along are you…?"

"Dunno…" Jin stopped next to him. "Anyway, can you please clean the litter box?"

"You don't have a litter box…"

"Please…don't argue with me today brother…" Jin groaned. "I haven't been feeling well as I've been experiencing a little—" Jin gagged as he barfed and wiped his mouth. "Ah…morning sickness. But I shall manage." He stroked his stomach. "It's for the baby… It's for baby…"

At the baby's clothing store…

Ragna and Jin walked around looking for clothes for their child, much to Ragna's dismay. Jin ran up to some shoes and took the little pain of shoes in his hand.

"Brother, look at these pairs of shoes! They're so adorable!"

"STOP! Talking like that!" Ragna said.

"You are just going to bring down the mood aren't you…?" Jin groaned as he put the shoes down. He looked to see a pregnant woman standing by the shirts stand and calls out to her. "Oh wow…! You look amazing!"

"Thank you!" The woman smiled. She had long brown hair and wore a blue top and black pants. She rubbed her stomach and giggled. "My boys coming along great. The doctor said there aren't any problems."

"That's good. I just started a little bit ago."

"Huh… Wait…but aren't you a man?" The woman asked.

"Are you? Looking at that hair on your upper lip I wonder what kind of man would even bat an eye at you. And judging by your age and looking at your stomach, whatever youve got in there is a hundred precent brwin dead." Jin snarled.

"Ok! Thats enough." Ragna gasped wide eyed as he pulled his brother away.

"I hated that lady!" Jin scoffed.

At the hospital...

Ragna and Jin stopped at the hospital to get their baby checked, and Jin dressed up as a woman to keep suspicions down. He put on some make up with a long blond wig and a dress.

"You look freaking ridiculous…" Ragna face palmed.

"I do not look too ridiculous for you to put a baby in me." Jin retorted. A second later, a male doctor with black frilly hair and dark colored eyes walked in.

"Hello, my name is Dr. Fredrickson. I will be examining you." The man said.

"Ok," Jin responded in a feminine voice. "Now can you check if the baby is healthy?"

"Of course. Now…" The doctor looked under the dress and put two fingers to his chin. "Hmm… It would seem as if your vagina has a penis and two testicles."

"O-Oh I um… I coughed and…all that came out."

"Oh, well that explains it."

'Are you kidding me!? What kind of run down place is this!? That explains it my ass!' Ragna cursed in his head.

"Now how old are you?" The doctor asked.

"Um… Fourteen?" Jin said. He looked pasted the doctor to see Ragna raising his thumb with a panicked look. "Um fifteen… B-But he didn't force himself on me!"

"Oh, ok. That's all that matters."

"Yeah so," Ragna stared blankly at the doctor. "Are there a lot of stairs in this building?"

Random restaurant

"Ok so, what do you want to, brother?" Jin asked as they were now at the counter. He felt an eye and looked to see the counterman staring at him. "What you gotta problem? My husband will kick your ass."

"Stop saying I'm your husband!"

"U-Uh…!" Jin held his stomach and groaned.

"What? What now?" Ragna asked. His question was soon answered as a liquid came down onto the floor from Jin, and he knew it wasn't urine.

"My water just broke!"

"Oh god!" Ragna gasped.

"It's ok… It's ok…! Brother, call the doula! You have to call the doula!"

"W-Wha—doula!? I don't even know who that is!"

"It's a divorced women who knows about lady parts and cheers you on! LET'S GO!" Ragna pulled Jin by the arm and ran outside. They had one problem.

"We don't have a fucking ride!" Ragna growled.

"Damn it! Wait, brother! You still have the starting gun!?"

"Y-Yeah! Why!?"

"Give it to me!" Jin said. Ragna quickly took the starting gun out his pocket and handed it too Jin. He ran in front of the street as the car driving stopped. Jin quickly went to the window and held it up. "Get out of the *beep* car! Get out the *beep* car right now!" He smashed the window and opened the door as the man screamed. "Come on, get out! Come do it, do it, do it!"

The man rolled out the car as Ragna slowly put him down on the ground and got in as Jin got in right behind him. Ragna stepped on the gas and quickly drove as he looked behind him. "Did we just car jack someone?"

"We sure did, brother… We sure did…" Jin nodded, but soon the pain came back as he grunted. Ragna saw his pain and stepped on it harder, weaving around cars as he drove. "Drive faster, brother!"

"I'm a ready going over the fucking speed limit!" Ragna said.

"Damn it! Too late, pull over! It's starting to come out!"

"Wha!? Of where!?"

"I'm not sure…" Jin responded. Ragna made a hard right as he parked up. "Ok… Brother…I need you to deliver the baby…" Jin quickly took his tights off.

"O-Ok hold on a second… I think we shouldn't get the car dirty."

"Oh no, of course not. Our first priority should make sure the car stays clean." Jin rolled his eyes. "Guh! Oh god! How the hell did Murphy Brown make this look so easy!?"

"How do you even know who that is?"

"Just help me deliver the *beep* baby!"

"Ok, ok… Shit! I don't know where to look!" Ragna said in a panic.

"Well maybe you should look at the part where a baby is coming out! Oh god…! Oh god its coming!"

Now outside car

"Wait don't get anything on the—!" Ragna was too late in his warning as one came out. "Seats…"

"Oh god another ones coming!"

"I don't see it!"

"I think it's coming out of my mouth!" Jin gagged and screamed. "There's more! And they're coming out of everywhere! AH! Kill me this hurts to much!"

"HOLY *beep*! What the hell is happening!?"

"Brother, save the placenta!" Jin said.

"Do you even have a placenta!?"

"Whatever comes out save it, I want to eat it."

"This is not the time for that!"

"Ok, brother, who many of them are there now!?" Jin asked.

"Um…three…four, five, six!"

Random guy walks and looks into the car. "You know… I woke up for a gay wedding this morning… I was not expecting this…"

Back in Jin's room at the Yabiko branch…

The room was filled with kids that looked like the combination of Jin and Ragna. Some had a mixture of white and blond hair, while others just had blond or white. Some even had red or green eyes, or both. Jin took one up and set them in a cradle.

"Ok… I just put Rick and Morty to bed. Also I saw some trying to eat each other so...that's something we need to watch out for."

"This… This is a nightmare…" Ragna sighed and rubbed his temples.

"Come on, brother. Look on the bright side. One day we will go out, get married and have children. At least this way, we can get some training." Jin smiled and pointed to one. "Hey look that one looks exactly like you."

"Hm?" Ragna turned around and saw a baby with the same eyes as him. He picked him up as the babies small hands reached out to him. "Hey… You know…this guys…actually kinda cute. Kinda looks like a mini me." He holds the baby as it giggled and hugged him.

"Ah, see there you go. Aw, Dick really likes you."

"I like Dick."

"Ha! You like dick! His names not Dick you idiot, it's John!"

"Shut up…"

Wow… I did this on the fly after watching a few family guy episodes. I'm sorry, I had to add those beeps. Well anyway, this was much longer then the other one, but I hoped you guys enjoyed this randomness. Tales of Azure will be the next updated, and it will be out soon. Probably Sunday or next Monday. I'm having that summer fever! See ya!