Mini-Chapter! (: Lyrics are provided by the talented Panic! At The Disco. The song is Nails for Breakfast, Tacks for Snacks.
"I'm sure you want to give up the ghost with just a little more poise then that."
Just Minutes Before:
Craig tried to guess how long he'd been sitting at her doorstep. It was cold, being December and all. The un-shoveled snow had melted through the thin denim of his pants and was now freezing his bum. He shifted; trying to make himself warmer, more comfortable, but had no luck.
Maybe this was a sign he should stop being such a coward and just knock on her damn door.
He'd always ran away from her; actually, from everything. Maybe that's why he went to Vancouver. When things got to rough, Craig either overreacted and went on a bipolar rampage, or broke down and avoided the situation. It was a talent he wasn't so proud of, and one that was proving to show at the worst situations, like say, now.
But damnit, Ellie deserved more.
Honestly, he'd been a bigger bastard to her than anyone else. Even her mom. At least her mom had avoided her, drowning herself in bitter alcohol. Craig hadn't bothered to give her that luxury. No, he flaunted himself around her. He used to flirt, recklessly, and then proceed to run off with some bimbo, like Manny. Truthfully, the three years of silence was probably the best gift he could have ever given her.
Usually Craig slept during flights. But the flight between LA and Toronto had been spent with a notebook and a pen. For 6 hours he had scribbled viciously onto a piece of paper, trying desperately to form the things he needed so badly to say to Ellie. Mostly he wanted to say sorry, but there were other things too, feelings that he'd shoved away for too long. Nothing he wrote had come out right, though, and he felt so inadequate. Just once, he wished he could write as smoothly and eloquently as the red-head possessing his thoughts.
Poise, he thinks. He doesn't want Ellie to see the timid, indecisive Craig he one was.
The sky was turning dark, and with slight reluctance, a lot of fear and excitement, and little confidence, he stood up, ran his fingers through his hair.
And knocked on Ellie Nash's door.