Chapter Three

No one here can see my tears … the pain that's been around for so many years.

Ginny sat in the bathroom crying on the floor. She had only said what she had so that Draco would admit that he thought of her as a friend. That he did care about her, but apparently she had been wrong, it was stupid of her to ever think that a Malfoy could have any feelings towards a Weasley, friendly or otherwise. She cried harder as she heard moans coming from Draco's room. She ran back to her room and grabbed her dagger, heading back to the bathroom and locking both doors.

She didn't know why but Draco's words had affected her deeply, she wanted him to like her, even if it was only as a friend. She had no other friends, why couldn't she just have this one. The guys at the club only liked her because they though she would put out in the end if they were nice to her. Nobody actually like her for who she was, and when she thought she had finally found someone who could. They left her, just like all the others.

She took the dagger and dragged it across her wrist, opening some old wounds that were healing, making more and more blood pour out. She sat there crying and dragging the dagger over and over on her wrist, causing more and more blood to pour out. Once her tears subsided Ginny felt weak, she looked down at her wrist and noticed it was completely covered in new cuts. Shit she thought, she had never done it as bad as this before. She quickly cleaned up the mess and tried to stem the blood flow as well as she could, eventually putting a charm on so no more blood would come out, but leaving the cuts. She stumbled to her room, feeling faint due to so much blood loss. She pulled out a blood replenishing potion out of the drawer and took it, placing the empty bottle back in the drawer before falling asleep on the bed.

Ginny awoke the next morning, still feeling gluggy and weak, she went to the bathroom and showered, taking a hangover potion beforehand. Afterwards she looked down at her wrists and noticed how bad they where. Fuck! She thought, remind myself never to cut while pissed again. Pulling on her cloak to cover her arms she decided to head down to the kitchen to eat something, she couldn't remember the last time she had eaten and after last night she would need to if she wanted to stay conscious.

She walked into the kitchen to find Harry in there alone. She looked at him and then passed him, getting ready to make herself a cup of tea, not expecting him to notice her. Therefore when Harry looked up and spoke to her she nearly dropped her cup of tea from shock.

'Hey Ginny, I haven't spoken to you in ages, your always locked up in your room, or down in the dungeons with Malfoy, and your never at meal times.' Harry said to her as she sat down across from her.

Ginny looked at him shocked. Since when had Harry been talking to her. Sure they talked occasionally, but not recently, everyone had been too preoccupied to bother with her. They didn't include her in anything and here Harry was saying how he hadn't spoken to her in ages, and that he actually noticed her not being around. They were all just so confusing sometimes. One day they would speak to her, the next they would treat her like she had never existed. She wanted to find out what they wanted from her, she couldn't take much more of this.

However instead of expressing this Ginny just smiled and answered him 'Hey Harry, Yeah, I guess I've been busy lately.'

'Still, poor you, having to be holed up with Malfoy'

Ginny simply nodded, unable to contain herself she burst out with the question that had been pressing her since he had first said hello. 'Look Harry, I don't mean to be rude, but why are you talking to me?'

'What do you mean Ginny, I just wanted to say hey.' Harry answered, looking shocked at the question, as if it was nothing but normal to talk to Ginny.

'Harry you and the rest of my family never talk to me unless you need something. So why all of a sudden the small talk, ever since the chamber incident you have all been distant. Mum and Dad hardly ever bother with me anymore. It wasn't too bad with them until the end of my fifth year, and then they became cold like the rest of you.'

Harry suddenly looked nervous and was looking to the door as if praying that somebody would walk through it and provide a distraction. When nobody came through he looked back to Ginny and sighed. 'Look Ginny, none of us meant to be that way to you. We weren't sure if Voldemort was actually still possessing you or not. Dumbledore didn't think that it would be a good idea to divulge any information to you, just in case. So the way we handled it was by shutting you out completely. As for the thing with your parents, maybe you should talk to them about it.'

'Yeah well that explains at least my second year, not all the others. Im pretty sure it became clear that he wasn't still possessing me Harry. So why didn't you all stop treating me like I wasn't there? Huh?'

'I honestly don't know Ginny, I really don't. We didn't mean to intentionally hurt you. You have to believe that, we were trying to protect you.'

'Harry I'm not a little kid, I can protect myself. And how exactly is having you guys not talking to me and mum and dad shutting me off protecting me.'

'Come on Ginny, It's not like we meant to hurt you. And you really should talk to your parents about them, not me. We all love you. Can't you at least try to forgive us?' Harry begged.

Ginny looked up at Harry, he definitely looked genuine. But how could she forgive someone who hadn't trusted her all those years ago, and as a result completely shut her off from her brother and Hermione and himself. They had done nothing to rectify the situation in recent years, and she couldn't for the life of her understand at all.

'Look Harry, I don't know. You all hurt me more than you could ever imagine, I just don't know if I can forgive you.' She said standing up and walking out of the room, leaving a shocked and defeated Harry behind her.

Harry had certainly not been expecting that response. It hit him then how much Ginny really had changed. She was no longer the little girl with the crush on him, nor was she the dependent little girl. She had grown to be independent and apparently out of her crush she had once had on him. They had always assumed that Ginny didn't mind being alone, that them not confiding in her as much anymore didn't bother her. Apparently they had been wrong. Maybe they should have tried to mend the gap before now. If they were to succeed they would need to work hard, and work fast.

Ginny went back to her room and sat down on her bed. She should be back down in the lab with Draco but she didn't think that she would be able to handle being around him, not today. She sighed and lay back on her bed, falling asleep.

It had been three days since Ginny had spoken to Draco and she finally decided to head back down to the labs. She didn't necessarily want to talk to Draco, but Snape had sent an owl saying that he wanted a full cabinet of the potion brewed up for one week's time.

Ginny walked into the room to noticed Draco already working. He looked up as she entered the room, 'Weasley, I take it you got Snape's owl then?' Ginny simply nodded and went to the second cauldron to start brewing, Draco looked and Ginny once more before continuing his potions.

She looked like she had been eating, that was a good sign. He thought to himself. She will need to keep her strength up if what Dumbledore has said is true. Suddenly Draco noticed Ginny leaning over to grab something from the ingredients shelf in front of him. He looked where she was reaching and noticed where sleeve had come up and noticed something on her wrist. He grabbed her arm and pulled her sleeve up, twisting her wrist so it faced him. He looked from her and back down to her wrist. It was covered in cuts, some old, some new, and a lot of old scars. He looked down at it shocked.

Ginny recovered from the shock of Draco's actions and yanked her arm back out of his grip. 'Weasley, what the fuck is that!' he growled at her.

'None of your business Malfoy, like you said the other day, I'm just a lowly Weasley, I sure as hell am not your friend, I mean nothing to you. So what the fuck does it matter.' She said, her voice deathly quiet as she turned and walked quickly out of the doors.

Draco recovered from the shock of what had just passed before running out of the labs after her. 'Weasley, Weasley, wait up … Ginny!' he called out to her retreating back. Ginny froze, that was the first time he had ever called her by her actual name. Draco caught up to her and slowly turned her around to face him.

'Ginny, come on don't do this. We both know that you mean more to me then I let on. You know what I'm like. I'm a Malfoy for fucks sake, I have been trained since I was born that we were not allowed to feel, to feel was to be weak. So, sorry if im not forthcoming with my emotions.' He said, as Ginny looked down at the floor.

Draco gently touched her face, pulling her chin up, making her eyes meet his. 'Ginny why would you do this to yourself?' He said, looking at her in the eyes.

Ginny couldn't take it anymore and burst out into tears, Draco taking him in her arms and leading her back to his room. Placing her on the bed he cradled her in his arms, making soothing noises until her tears subsided, her breathing evened out. Draco placed her under the covers and lay down next to her, his arm draping over her body possessively.

He couldn't for the life of him guess why she would want to do this to herself. She had a loving family, sure they didn't show it by they loved her, enough to do anything in their power to protect her, surely she could see that. It suddenly dawned on him that perhaps her family hadn't told her everything behind why they limited their contact with her. That would definitely explain the state she was in now, if they hadn't explained it would look like they had simply all abandoned her, that they no longer cared for her. He would definitely have to have a talk to Molly about Ginny as soon as he could.

Ginny woke the next day to find herself in Draco's room. He was currently lying next to her, her head resting on his chest, his arm around her. She lay there for a few minutes admiring his gorgeous sleeping face. It was then that she realised that over the past few weeks she had been alone with Draco that she had begun to have feelings for him. She didn't know how or when, but she definitely had some sort of feelings for him.

Draco began to stir and eventually opened his eyes, looking down at Ginny he smiled. 'Hey, you feeling any better?'

'Um, yeah, thanks for last night, and sorry'

'Why are you sorry' Draco asked, noticing the look of embarrassment on her face.

'For turning into a blubbering mess on you'

'Don't worry about it Ginny' he said, noticing the small smile that graced her features as he said her name. 'But Ginny, why did you do this to yourself?' he asked, holding up her wrist.

Ginny groaned 'Please Draco, I really don't want to talk about it.' She pleaded.

Draco sighed and nodded 'Fine, but it's going to have to be discussed eventually, you know that don't you'.

'Yes, but not now' she answered getting up and walking towards the bathroom. 'Well I'm going to have a shower, we have potions to brew today.' She said avoiding his eyes as she walked away.

Draco flopped back onto the bed as Ginny walked away. Yes he would definitely have to have a chat to Molly as soon as possible.

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