Scene Three
From the safety and quiet from his house that he had always been accustomed to, Remus now found himself in the corner of the most famous train station in London. Remus's father walked through the crowds of more Muggles Remus had ever seen and came back in a few moments later with a carriage and his luggage back in its original size. He had taken his robe off and appeared more like the Muggles that surrounded them. From a nod from his father Remus followed suit and placed his own dark grey fabric over his fathers, covering the cauldron.
His nervousness that enveloped his body moments ago was forgotten as he looked around at the settings he was in no way expecting. When his parents had told him about Platform Nine and Three-Quarters they had only spoken fondly of a scarlet train surrounded with other wizards and witches, they had spoken of the magical brick wall he had to walk into but they had not spoken of the chaos that currently surrounded him. Remus's mother took his hand as they followed the path Remus's father made walking in front of them.
Remus looked down at the pale brown brick of the floor, quickly watching his dark brown leather shoes as they followed his father's step—Remus trying hard to match his father's long stride. He tried not to look at the unknown faces of the people surrounding them that seemed like they knew where they were going. He envied the Muggles at that moment, wishing he could be calm about going somewhere; despite the people all around his family were rushing, they seemed to know exactly where they were supposed to going. His mother gripped his hand, letting him know that she was right beside him. His father slowed his pace as they neared the seventh and eighth train stations, "Remus, would you like to take control of the trolley when you enter?" They stopped in front of the matching pale brick brown wall between the two stations.
"I suppose so, yes, maybe," he rattled off quickly, his nerves approaching maximum level again.
"Do you remember how to do it?" His mother whispered, still holding onto his hand. "All you must do it take control of the carriage and walk through the wall," Remus knew all of this but still listened intently anyway. "If you are a bit scared you can go to a run, or your father and I can go with you."
"I-" Remus thought about the different options, "I think I want to try it alone." He knew he should do it alone, even though he was scared. In a matter of hours he would be leaving his parents and would have to do things on his own. This was the perfect time as any to start the habit.
"All right, we will right after you. Don't mind about the other people. Don't feel as if you have to worry about being inconspicuous," his mother added, placing one of her hands on his back while Remus inhaled deeply.
"When you become more comfortable with it you can start thinking about being evasive around the Muggles," his father said, "but today your main concern should just be to enter the platform. It is smoother than floo powder and apparition, and you won't feel it." Remus lined his trolley with the wall between the platforms counting in his head, stilling holding onto that one breath. "Are you ready?" his father asked. "When you are, just go. Don't think about it and just go, all right?"
Remus nodded his head. One, he thought, looking about to see if anyone would cross his projected path. Two, he closed his eyes and imagined his parents standing on either side of him, focusing on where his mother's hand had been. He gripped the plastic handle of the trolley and repeatedly alternated putting his weight on each foot. Three, he closed his eyes harder and began to shorten the twelve-foot distance between the him and the wall. With each step he increased his speed until he was sure he was running and briefly considered what he must look like to a passing Muggle. All of a sudden he couldn't hear the bustling mass of people at King's Cross and heard a different, muted white noise. He stopped rather quickly and nearly fell from the momentum coming off from the sprint. He was no longer standing inside King's Cross but rather an outdoor train platform with a scarlet red engine stationary on a track, just as his parents had described. A few birds littered the aisle, but it seemed deserted except for him and the swinging sign that read "Hogwarts Expressed" underneath the plaque that listed the station's number. Attached to the bottom of the sign was the time of departure.
He turned around just in time to see his mother and father stroll in with their arms intertwined with each other. "Welcome to Platform Nine and Three-Quarters," his father said with a growing smile.
"Lovely," his mother said more to herself as she looked around the empty station. "We have plenty of time for us to load you into a compartment and say our good-byes." Remus's father grabbed his son's luggage and began walking to the train. "Now, dear, the Prefects and the Head Boy and Girl are stationed in the front of the train so if you have any troubles, big or small, just begin walking to the front to find them. They all have badges and are there to help you. If you can't find anyone, talk with the conductor. All right?" Remus nodded and his mother smiled. Remus's father opened a door on the first coach and walked in. Remus followed his father's footsteps to find himself in a narrow corridor with the compartments closed off with dark brown doors to his left and windows showing the outside scene of the platform to his right.
"Do you have any preference?" His father asked from in front of him.
"No, I don't think so," Remus replied quietly; scared of being on the train that would separate himself and his soon to be old life.
His father picked the third compartment down from where they entered. He held open the door with his foot and allowed Remus and his mother to walk in first. The compartment had two red rows of seats that faced each other and luggage racks high over the seats. Between the seats was a large window and above the seats were lights that filled the compartment with a yellow-tinged tint. Remus's father lifted his cauldron up to the racks but left the trunk on the ground, "For you to get your school robes," he explained. He himself picked up and brushed off his faded black robe and put it back on now that he was away from the Muggles. Remus, not knowing what else to do as his family stood in the compartment, did the same. Remus's mother closed the compartment door and walked over to Remus.
"Now I know you must be scared, but remember of all of the precautions that have been installed for you, all right?" Remus nodded, forming his hands into fists and he picked the skin from around his fingernails with his index finger due to nerves that he had come to associate with whenever his lycanthropy was brought up. "The Whomping Willow was planted over the summer under the guise of study for high levelled Herbology students, but Madam Pompfrey will lead you there for your monthly transformations. Madam Pompfrey is also stocked and prepared to treat you before and after your transformation with potions that we didn't have at home." Remus has been told a version of this speech dozens of times, the first being from the mouth of the kind Headmaster Dumbledore. He looked down at the carpeted floor, wishing for once that his 'condition' could not be mentioned. Especially when he was the only one infected by the curse who held the burden of keeping it a secret to protect the life he knew. Remus couldn't imagine a life where he wasn't burdened by the disease, and he hated that his mother felt like she had to constantly remind him of keeping it secret.
Remus's father moved closer to him, "Remember, too, that none of your teachers will know about your condition—only your head of house due to set up precautions that may need to be added later on. When you enter this school year, no one will know you, do you understand? You have been given a wonderful opportunity to make the impression that you want to be made on your present life, not your past." Remus nodded at this, having been relieved upon learning early in the summer that only one of his teachers would know about his monthly absences. "Your upcoming professors will only know that you have been allowed to have absences each month that have been approved by Headmaster Dumbledore."
"Also be sure to share any concerns as well as accomplishment through letters. If something arises and you are apprehensive to talk to your professors about it we can help you. Headmaster Dumbledore has also set up a direct floo connection between his office and our home that you are free to use. Do you still remember the password to Professor Dumbledore's office?"
"Yes," Remus said quietly, thinking of the muggle candy name. "I wrote it down, even."
"Excellent, Remus," she replied. She paused and looked back at his father, "I know you know this, but I must say again that you mustn't, under any circumstances, tell anyone or let anyone know of your condition. Did you pack the parchment that listed off excuses for your absences?" Remus nodded, with a minute scowl burrow in-between his brows. He knew all of this; he wasn't thick enough to let anyone know of his monthly condition. He had seen how it divided his father from his family; he knew the looks of pity and fear that people gave his parents when they discovered what their son was. "If you need to think of any more excuses, write to us and we will send them post-haste. Also, be sure not to appear too interested in the lycanthropy subject in or outside of class, all right? You don't need anyone seeing that and possibly asking questions. Discretion will make your life easier," Remus's mind flashed a vivid picture of where he had hidden his book on werewolves.
His mother sighed and finally smiled down at Remus, "Now know that whichever house you will be sorted into tonight will make your father and I so proud. We are already so very proud by your decision to come here despite your fears and concerns. I know without a doubt in my mind that if you went into my old house, Hufflepuff would be honoured to have you."
"And I know that you would be able to get along with the Ravenclaws if you were to be sorted there," his father spoke fondly of his own house. He father patted his left inside breast pocket in his robe, pulling out two objects from it. He handed Remus the first, "I only ask that you read this tonight after you are sorted." Remus looked down at the thick parchment envelope in his hand that was unaddressed but sealed with his father's favourite blue wax. Remus felt the hard wax with a finger before nodding and safely putting the letter away in a pocket in his robes. "And this is to be opened for whenever you feel the need to," his father said with a smile, handing Remus a small package of chocolate. "I know meeting new people can be hard, but if you offered to share this it might be easier."
"Your father with all of his clever thinking," his mother remarked.
Remus also put the package in a pocket, not knowing what to say. "Thank you" seemed too simple and not good enough to express the appreciation Remus felt. Not only for his new watch, the letter his father had written beforehand, or for the way his father knew how hard it was for Remus to reach out to people. He wasn't ready to say good-bye nor wanted to. He looked to the outside through the window and watched the bright green grass sway back and forth from a soft wind against the harsh horizon line where the blue sky met the green. Outside of their closed door they heard sounds of other families carry luggage on the train; Remus turned to look at his parents.
He seemed so very small when he compared himself to them, especially with his father's height that made him seem too big to be in the compartment. He tried to imagine his father being on this train in his seventh year, his mother being in her fifth at that same time, then his sixth year, all the way to his first year where he couldn't imagine his father being a ten year old. How did his father bear it? The uncertainties of boarding a train to go to someplace everyone talked about but where he had never been before? How did his mother do it, being a Muggleborn and having had no previous knowledge of the legendary school? He was in the middle of the spectrum—having heard about the school since his birth but never having it in his reach as his father. But at the same time not knowing much about the institution, much like his mother because no one felt comfortable about talking about Hogwarts in detail around Remus on account everyone believed he would never be able to go. He wondered about the family that sounded as if they were moving in someone a few compartments down and wondered if the student was a first-year like him.
Remus's mother saw his stare and briskly walked to him to crush him into a hug. "I shall miss you so much Remus," he knew his mother was telling the truth but he could not help but think of the conversation he overheard last night about what his parents could do when he wasn't around as much anymore. He felt guilty for eavesdropping and relaxed his stance, wrapping his arms around his mother in an act of forgiveness even though his parents didn't know of his deed.
"I miss you, too," he mumbled into the fabric of his mother's sleeve. He meant to say that he would miss her, but he didn't try to fix his slip of mouth. He felt his father's presence come closer and soon felt his father's arms envelope the two.
"I think it would be best if we chose not to drag this out," his father said as he stepped back a minute later. "We won't leave the platform until after the train has left, but you can use this time to settle in, all right?"
"I am certain that you shall try to do your best and make us even more proud than you have made us," his mother reassured him after she kissed his cheek.
"But try not to only focus on your school work, I know it will be easy to hide yourself away with books, but I urge you to try and connect with your classmates." His father touched the top of Remus's head lightly, petting his hair before sighing. "I love you, Remus."
"I love you, too. Both of you," he said, changing his gaze from one parent to the other.
His mother hugged him again and whispered into his ear, "I know you will probably like it there, being around children your own age and learning, but if you don't like it, don't be afraid to let us know. We want you to do well, but if it doesn't work out, there is no shame in leaving." Remus nodded his acknowledgement against her cheek, releasing her from his grasp. He followed his parents to the compartment door and watched his mother follow his father down the corridor and out of the train onto the platform that was more populated than before. He looked around and saw a few other children boarding the train far away from him on the carriage. Remus edged closer to the window and he watched his parents interlock arms before walking out of his sight. With the presence of other people on the train, he didn't risk walking down the corridor to see more of his parents. Instead he turned around on his heel and confined himself to his compartment.
He dared not to sit down because he knew he would only get back up again. He paced around the small compartment, feeling alone for the first time that morning. He rattled the watch against his wrist and checked for his wand in his robes. He fixed his fringe against his face with help from a small rectangular mirror fixed on a section of the compartment wall next to the seats. He walked nervously from each side of the compartment because he did not know what else to do with all of his thoughts going around in his mind—he didn't even know where to begin in thinking about them. He felt his father's letter inside a pocket and tried to calm down, forcing himself to sit.
Yes, he was nervous. That much was expected, and he knew that. Every first-year that was boarded, boarding, or about to board this train must feel some sort of nerves or anticipation. But what killed him was that he was unlike every other first-year because of what he was forced to suffer. He thought of the biggest precaution that Dumbledore had installed just for him, a rare animated tree that must not have been easy to plant. He didn't know why the headmaster had made such a big fuss just because of him, yes he was grateful, but why didn't the headmaster just floo him to and from home during his transformations? He and his parents had formed a system that had worked thus far, and now he hated that he would have to transform in a completely new environment. And while he loved his mother, he didn't love the way in which she repeated that if Hogwarts didn't work out then he could go home.
His parents loved Hogwarts, he knew that before he was accepted and had overhead them reminiscing numerous times about their professors and when they started seriously dating in his father's seventh year. His parents would quickly change topics whenever they saw Remus enter, masking the fact that he would never be able to have stories like they had. But after it was safe to openly discuss the school, he had seen how happy his parents had become in learning that they had not given birth to a total beast that had to remain isolated forever. Even if he hated Hogwarts, Remus decided, he would stay for them after all of the damage his condition caused them.
No, he couldn't let his mind become entrapped in those thoughts. At least not now when he was on his way to Hogwarts in less than an hour. He could reserve his self-wallowing until when he was alone and settled in his dormitory. Wherever that may be.
He heard more noises coming from outside the corridor as students passed his compartment. It was foolish for him to believe that he could remain alone for long; he realised, and tried to not think about a complete stranger sitting with him for the journey.
He wondered on how he would do in his classes, seeing as he had not learnt the normal studies with other wizard children of reading, writing, history, math and the fundamentals of magical theory, as was custom with wizard children. It was common for wizard families to come together for studies within the magical community for children too young for Hogwarts to learn the basics. Muggleborns were technically only missing the basic history of magic and magical studies before they left for Hogwarts. But, as in the case of Remus's father early schooling, his group had begun to learn a few simple charms. He knew his parents had tried their best to give him a broad learning experience as his mother home-schooled him when he was younger in a weird schedule in-between her part-time job as a sewing assistant to a magical boutique, his father contributing when he wasn't working.
He began to hear the sounds of more families cross onto the Platform and begin to load their children's possessions onto the train. Remus jumped in fright as his door swung open by a tall red-hair girl who wore blue robes. She looked at him and he wondered if she would make him leave.
"You a first-year then?" she asked in a sweeter voice than Remus was expecting.
"Good, then, welcome aboard. The prefects carriage is just down the corridor to the next carriage if you have any problem, all right?" At Remus's nod the girl closed the door as harshly as she opened it and Remus was alone once more. Though the event only lasted a few seconds, he couldn't stop replaying it in his mind. What about him made it so completely obvious that he was a first-year? Were there other things that he didn't know about to alert people of his personal life?
Remus was in the process of retrieving a book from his trunk when his compartment door opened once more. This time it opened much more slowly to reveal a soft, round pale face edging in to peek. The boy seemed startled to find Remus but continued to open it more before asking if he was alone.
The short round boy seemed relieved upon hearing an affirmitive, "Are you a first-year, too?" he asked in an north western Lancashire cadence.
Remus nodded, "Do you need a place to sit?" The boy with the mousy brown hair nodded. Remus tossed his retrieved book to his seat and helped bring in the boy's luggage, wondering where the boy's parents were.
"I'm Remus Lupin," he introduced himself to fill in the awkward energy between the two boys as they sat across from each other.
"Peter Pettigrew," the boy answered as they shook hands. Remus noted his quiet voice and wondered it if was because he was nervous. Remus's own feet dangled from the seat, but because of this boy Peter's short stature, his feet hung inches above Remus's own. Peter stared intently out of the window as he fidgeted in his seat. One of his laces was untied and the end of his cloak was tucked underneath him in his haste to sit down. Even though he felt guilty for thinking it, Remus was glad that this boy seemed just as nervous as him and he appeared to be coming from a wizarding family. The two boys sat quietly across from each other, one sitting still and the other being the perfect opposite. Remus knew he should say something, anything, but no words came to mind. He pictures his parents sitting on the platform and recalled his father's advice on at least trying to connect with people. Remus sucked his breath and willed himself to speak.
"Which-" Peter asked, turning his head from the window to Remus.
"How-" Remus asked at the same time as Peter.
Both boys fell silent once more.
"How are you?" Remus asked once more, successful in his second attempt.
"Fine, thank you," Peter answered with his high voice.
Remus looked at his watch and found that they only had thirty minutes to go before the train's departure and he wondered how his parents were. He debated if he should find them to say a final good-bye to them but decided against it because of his father's reluctance to drag their farewells. Peter once more began to look out the window and played with his hands in his lap, Remus bit his upper lip and hunched over in his seat, wondering what Peter thought of him.
"Which house do you want to get into?" Peter asked, volleyed the conversation back several long minutes later.
Of course Remus had thought about the four prospects and which house he would like to be sorted into the most, he stayed up multiple nights just thinking of the possibilities. While his mother was a Hufflepuff and proud to be so, he could see himself very easily being one also, but his father was a proud Ravenclaw and Remus could imagine being one also. Remus also knew that depending on his answer, Peter would judge him: it showed a lot about a person based on their house preference.
"I don't know," Remus replied honestly. "I expect I'll be in Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff."
Peter nodded his head seriously, reiterating the fact to Remus that houses were a weighty business at Hogwarts. It said a lot about a person as to what house they belonged to, with each one having its stereotypes. Hufflepuffs were generally hard-workers, dedicated, honest, and generally know as being helpful and fair. Ravenclaws were notorious for placing intelligence first and were known to be curious and eccentric learners, and sometimes cocky. Slytherins were known to be resourceful and had been known to come from a lot of the pureblood wizarding families, creating certain togetherness that was lacking in the other houses. Gryffindors, though, were known for trying to be the heroes and sometimes had the stereotype of being bronze instead of brains. While they encompassed the traits of medieval knights, Remus had only heard them to be brave. Bravery, his father had pointed out, is the same as stupidity; the only thing that distinguishes the two is the outcome.
"What about you, Peter? What house would you like to be sorted into?"
"I don't know. My mother was a Hufflepuff, so I might end up there. But I don't know what I am good at. I just hope I'm not too much of a hat-stall—"
At that point the opening of the compartment door interrupted the boys' difficult conversation. A tall blonde-hair boy and a short light brown haired girl stood in the corridor, "May we sit in here?" the boy asked, Remus noticed that they struggled with their luggage.
Remus looked at Peter and sensing no problems with him, Remus said yes and helped the two bring their luggage into the compartment. The girl, he saw, had brought along a tiny grey owl.
"Thanks, mate," the brown haired boy said, extending his hand to Remus. "I'm Andrew McGivern," he introduced himself. "And this is Nicole-?"
"I'm Nicole Haven," she answered with a southern lisp. Remus and Peter gave their introductions and the girl sat next to Remus and the boy next to Peter. The boy was dressed in an ordinary blue cloak and the girl was dressed only in muggle clothing. Remus could not help but wonder if she was a Muggleborn like his mother or had take off her cloak as to not be looked upon by the Muggles at King's Cross.
"Thanks for letting us sit here, mate," Andrew said in a Geordie accent. "Everywhere else we checked were filled with upper years and they all kicked us out."
"Are you first-years as well?" Remus asked.
Andrew nodded proudly, "If I'm not mistaken, were you two talking about the sorting when we knocked?" Peter nodded. "I was just telling Nicole about the houses. She didn't know much about them."
"Oh," Remus nodded slowly as if he knew the plight of being from a non-wizarding family. The train lurched forward nearly sending Remus toppling off the seat but Andrew had caught him before he could fall. Remus nervously looked at his watch, needing the confirmation that it was indeed eleven o'clock, sharp. He pushed the fear and nervousness back down into his throat and tried to regain himself mentally. Outside to his right the fairly flat landscape sped by but was kept composed by the hard blue sky over it. He tried to nonchalantly scoot himself more into the corner of the seat, away from Nicole.
"We were just discussing the Hufflepuff house; both of our mothers were from there," Remus added after a few moments.
"Aye, both of my parents were from there. That's the only house that I want to be sorted in. I was just telling Nicole that after we passed the barrier."
"I was nearly late if Andrew hadn't helped me. I was afraid of going through the brick wall and he heard me talking to my parents 'bout it." Andrew seemed proud to hear this and Remus watched as he puffed out his chest upon hearing Nicole. "Your family is quite nice," she added to him.
"Did the person who met with you not tell you about crossing onto the Platform?" Remus inquired.
"What person?" Andrew and Peter asked almost simultaneously. Peter seemed embarrassed by this and scooted back further into his seat.
"Well, when a Muggleborn—" Remus stopped feeling foolish. He looked to Nicole sitting next to him and apologised, "you would know more than I possibly could," giving her the stage to speak as the scarlet Hogwarts Express shuttled them out of the South of England.
Nicole thanked him before answering Peter and Andrew's question. "Since I was brought up in the muggle world, and knew nothing about all of this," she motioned to the area around them, "until this summer, Hogwarts sent someone to talk to my parents and me to explain everything and that I was a witch. The woman that came to my house was really nice, she was a Muggleborn herself and works in the section of the Ministry that deals with what you call Muggles. She chaperoned us to Diagon Alley and helped us work with the goblins at that huge bank."
"Gringotts," Andrew interrupted.
Nicole nodded at Andrew, "Yeah, that's the one. And yes," she turned in her seat to face Remus, "Ms Lugh told us about the barrier, but I was still afraid to walk through a brick wall! Are you a Muggleborn as well?" She asked him curiously, looking at his cloak.
"No, but my mother is. She told me about how someone came to her home to explain everything to my grandparents and her." Remus picked his fingers again from the direct attention Nicole and the others were giving him. It was one thing for a boy just as nervous as him to be talking to him, quite another for two seemingly confident students to be directing their attentions on him.
"My dad came from Muggles," Peter interjected.
"One of my grand-parents was a Muggleborn," Andrew added proudly. In the sadistic part of Remus's mind he imagined a scene where he would further interject that not only was he a half-blood, but also a half-creature. Remus had never entered such a pointed topic about magical heritage before, but then again, he did have limited experience with conversations with other magical children his age. Whenever he was with his mother's parents they had encouraged him to interact with the other children in the same neighbourhood his mother grew up in. His father, when speaking about his childhood never mentioned telling near strangers about his magical blood, but maybe he had forgotten. Or maybe Remus had his luck and talked with the only group who was interested in sharing their heritage. Or maybe it was just a thing wizards did to introduce themselves, or maybe it was just a first-year thing when no one knew anyone.
Andrew and Nicole regained their conversation about the houses and Remus was left to himself. He did not mind it necessarily, the weird silence that existed between him and Peter before was now extinguished by the murmuring of Andrew and Nicole.
Remus fidgeted in his seat and pulled out the book he sat on after helping Nicole and Andrew into the compartment. He ran his hand over the worn, faded cover he had seen hundreds of times. He had restarted this particular book a few days ago with the intention of finishing it at Hogwarts as a way to ease him in his new home. He liked the idea of finishing something old in a place so completely new to him. Already he had met more people who had treated him kindly than he probably ever did in his life, but he knew this was only because of who they thought he was, and not what he actually was.
He breathed in deeply and glanced briefly at the occupants sitting around him. Though the train was speeding north, Remus remained stationary in his compartment looking at the packed luggage of the other children. So far it had been easy to talk to people, and he wondered if it was out of desperation from everyone going to the same uncharted territory or if it was because people he happened to meet were exceptionally nice. He leaned more toward the former option and leaned closer to the window beside him. Peter had nestled his forehead against the windowpane and looked intently out of the window, Remus wondered what the plump boy was thinking, noting that Peter seemed to look content.
Nicole and Andrew's conversation still filled the compartment to make a warm, inviting atmosphere and Remus knew instinctively from their easy vibes that if he decided to interrupt their conversation to jump in, neither one would have minded. But he didn't feel like doing that, at least not yet, and he thumbed his way to the place in the children's novel that he had read numerous times before to his spot in the beginning where he left off.
Remus nestled himself in his seat and tried to focus his mind exclusively on the story. It was a book aimed at wizarding children and focused on the tale of a young boy going on an adventure to the woods of Whales to retrieve a lost family token that would heal his sick mother. Remus especially liked this book because the boy was alone most of the time, just like him in real life, and to aid him on his journey the boy's mother and given him a map that showed the exact location anyone near the boy's vicinity was. The map even included the names of any intruders so the boy could prepare himself. He was also helped any friends he met along the way with the knowledge from the map, and from this, stories began to be told about the boy of being a Seer and a powerful wizard.
Somewhere in his train of thoughts Remus had stopped actually reading the book. His mother had given him the book a few years ago as a birthday present and he had loved it instantly. But he wondered why exactly. Remus himself knew that he would probably never go on an epic journey alone to dark woods where beasts reigned. Sure, the map that Remus enjoyed helped a lot, but it didn't help the boy defend himself with spells that he could remember from the top of his head. Remus himself only knew a handful of practical charms himself, nothing major and nothing to defend himself with. Maybe this was why he enjoyed it so much, because the boy was so unlike him but still had just enough traits similar to Remus that he could hope to be like the lad in the book.
Remus couldn't expand his thoughts any further because at that moment there was a knock on their door. Remus looked to Nicole and Andrew for what to do but they both stared at him. Remus marked his place in the book and closed it before standing, but as he set the book down in his seat to answer the door, the door opened itself.
"Food trolley," a nice older woman's voiced called in as she walked by the open entrance. The old, plump woman wore light pastel cloaks and had pale light grey hair wrapped up on top of her head. "Would anyone like anything off of the food trolley, dears?" she asked them with a kind smile. Andrew and Nicole stood up from the compartment seats and began to look at the selection for sale. Remus looked at Peter's sleeping form and decided to wake the boy. He prodded his arm lightly, trying to rouse him.
"Peter," he said quietly, but he still did not wake. "Peter," he said firmer and shook his arm. The boy opened his eyes, startled.
"Wha-?"Peter mumbled, pushing himself into a sitting position.
"The food cart is here, it's full of all sorts of different snacks," Andrew called over his shoulder as he pointed out the different candies to Nicole who only knew of the muggle variants.
"Oh," Peter breathed in. He looked up at Remus who still stood above him, "Thanks for waking me up then."
"Don't even think of it," Remus replied as Peter stood up.
"Are you all first-years?" the food witch asked sweetly. "Oh welcome then to the Hogwarts Express," she exclaimed at their affirmative nods. "You all will have a marvellous time at Hogwarts." Remus looked at the varying selections for sale; Fizzing Whizbees, the infamous Bertie Bott's Every Flavoured Beans, Canary Creams, Drooble's Best Blowing Gum. As Remus stared at everyone line up to buy the wares, Remus flashed to the scene earlier that morning where his father had warned him to go out of his way to fit in. As a result, Remus felt around in his front trouser pocket and took out a few of the small coins to buy a pack of Cauldron Cakes and Pumpkin Pasties.
He didn't feel like eating anything, his mind wasn't on food and he couldn't imagine how the others could be eating as the tea trolley had rolled down to the next compartment. Between Andrew and Nicole, a sampling of everything on the trolley was scattered between the two rows of seats. Peter had appeased his own hunger with liquorice wands and ice-cold pumpkin juice. Remus ignored his own food in favour of watching Andrew teach Nicole about how to properly open the package to the animated chocolate frogs. She looked as if she didn't believe his words when he said the frogs would actually jump. Remus envied her because she was a Muggleborn. All of this, everything he took for granted in his life, was new and exciting for her. Sure, she might have to catch up on theory that had been engrained in Remus's own mind, but that was easy in the grand scheme of it all; no one would remember the few weeks in the beginning of school where everyone was learning or relearning the foundations of magic.
Remus hid a smile as Nicole opened a package and a chocolate frog nearly jumped on her face. Prepared for this, Andrew had stationed himself near the opening and caught the inanimate beast in his hand as they both laughed. Remus chastised himself for being envious of her. At least Remus had grown up with the knowledge of magic and wasn't totally out of his comfort zone like she must be feeling. It was one thing to go to a school he never thought he would be able to go to versus going to a school he had never heard of to learn of things that he didn't think existed.
How funny Muggles were, Remus thought. How close they lived to wizards yet still magic wasn't believed in their society and the people who believed in it were made fools. Remus has been different that other children grown up in wizarding households because every summer he would spend three weeks at his mother's parents house; giving him a chance to live in the Muggle sphere right next to his wizarding one. That was the only set of grandparents that Remus really knew or enjoyed. His paternal grandfather died when he was three and ever since a wolf had bitten him when he was four, a riff was created between Remus's father and grandmother. His grandmother still invited them to the family get-together every Christmas Eve, but Remus felt ostracized from his other older cousins who had already left Hogwarts. Remus hated going over to that house. Between the stares of false acceptance and true pity he remembered fully what he was; a monster, an evil figure in muggle children fiction and wizarding nonfiction. If he only lived with his parents he could have grown up believing that everyone accepted lycanthropy and had no problem with his monthly transformations.
His Muggle grandparents weren't aware of his condition—it was a decision made early on from his parents. His mother's parents were already overwhelmed by trying to accept the wizarding world and that their daughter was married to a wizard. As a unified decision, Remus's parents had decided against telling them what happened seven years ago. Instead they only told them that Remus was sick and had to go to St. Mungo's Infirmary, a place that was difficult for Muggles to access.
Remus hated thinking of it and tried to bring his mind back to the current scene, one o'clock on the Hogwarts Express, two hours into the journey and Remus hadn't felt any of it pass by. He laid aside his Pumpkin Pasties and mostly eaten Cauldron Cakes in favour of his book again, eating as much as his unhungry stomach would allow. He was grateful for the breakfast, otherwise he might have been ravished by the time the trolley had come along. He made a mental note to add that to the first letter he would send to his parents. He should probably also see if they knew of Peter's mother and Andrew's parents who might have been in Hufflepuff the same time as his parents. He thumbed through the pages in his book as he curled in the corner between the window and the seat as everyone else settled into post hunger. Nicole was laughing at something Andrew said and Peter lounged next to Andrew listening in to add a spare comment every now and then.