Chapter 3

Roughly an hour-and-a-half after reviewing everything related to precisely how one would go about turning TV costume and car into real-world crime fighting items…

"Carlson," said a suffused with fervor Robert J. Johns after activating, with a touch, the intercom situated beside the supercomputer center at the far end of the subterranean DC superhero museum. "I'm ready."

"Very good, sir," Carlson's voice said smoothly, with little to no inflection of feeling.

Then, no longer than it took for the butler to take the multi-floor elevator into the cavernous belowground location…

"First, sir," he said whilst opening a special locked safe-like container in one corner of the sizeable sub-floor, "it will be necessary to incorporate what I believe is called 'dragon skin' bulletproof padding to torso and head. As you can see, such was previously purchased in abundance by the late Master."

"Yes, yes!" excitedly exclaimed the man whom had so swiftly arose from mediocrity to multi-billionaire, his eyes of green gazing longingly at the most recent creation of lightweight protection against gunfire. "This could really work!"

"Theoretically, sir," Carlson cautiously stated, whilst pulling out the bulletproof padding in order to reshape such to be permanently positioned within the half-cowl and, as to the torso, cinch such snuggly about Robert's upper-body.

Then, after donning said Bat-suit from the Sixties, Robert-as-Batman walked toward the Batmobile from that self-same show, as Carlson expounded somewhat sanctimoniously…

"The original curved Plexiglas of the Batmobile has already been replaced by bulletproofed windscreens. The Batmobile's body, however, is still susceptible to potential damage."

"I don't suppose," uncertainly said Robert-as-Batman, as he slipped himself behind the half-wheel as the driver's door, bearing the bat-symbol, closed solidly, "there really is a jet-like engine for rapid propulsion?"

"Though such was, on a small scale, a possibility," explicated Carlson, as snootily as expected of the peerless butler. "It was decided that it might too-easily destabilize said vehicle. However, the engine has been reworked to provide a top speed of some 200 miles-per-hour. Should such be required, of course."

"As this Batmobile is already aimed outward, toward the opposite side of the, uh, museum," mused this bona fide Batman, waving a Bat-gloved hand at a heavily shadowed section of the sub-floor region precisely opposite to the supercomputers section. "Might I surmise that…"

"It opens up," Carlson confidently concluded with a half head-nod, "onto a seemingly unused road that leads to a properly paved highway a thousand yards from the manor. Good luck, sir, on your first excursion as what the former Master had not lived long enough to experience."

"Carlson," asked a suddenly uncertain billionaire-cum-Batman about to drive a television vehicle called the Batmobile as cowl-covered eyes of green gaped at the butler extraordinaire, "is this as ridiculously dangerous as it appears? I mean…a man in a Bat-suit and a Bat-car about to combat crime?"

Not one to say anything at all disparaging to the Master of the Manor, especially since the previous had envisioned such just prior to expiration, Carlson simply said by way of an apparent afterthought, "By the way, sir, the Bat-belt you wear actually carries in its compartments a variety of real-world antipersonnel articles, such as miniature 'flash bombs', I believe they are called, as well as tear gas dispensers, and various sharp-edged 'bat-shaped' items for tossing."

"Really?" Robert-as-Batman managed with a sudden smile. "Does that mean there's a Batarang in one of the…"

"Yes," swiftly said Carlson as seemingly passionlessly as previous statements. "However, it has been significantly 'enhanced' so as to be much more self-sufficient, so to speak, and not truly need any accuracy-in-throwing on the part of yourself, sir."

With nothing else left to cautiously question, this real-world Batman managed to start a rumbling-with-heavy horsepower engine, normally meant for a race car rather than a television vehicle so intrinsically associated with a pre-recent movies version of a singularly costumed crime fighter…

"Here we go," quietly commented this Batman as, in the next split-second, a Bat-booted foot pressed upon an accelerator…

SCRRRRREEEEECH!

…and soared out through a half-hidden egress onto a rough-hewn road leading straight and sure to a highway, which would, ultimately, lead into the heart of a city wherein a crime could be quite quickly encountered.

Into New York City, to be exact. From an upstate estate far removed from prying eyes.

At first, there seemed to be naught to accomplish save giving nighttime New Yorkers a look at a television vehicle as recognizable as the Bat-suited person driving it.

Then, from an in-dash police band radio, yet another addition to the TV Batmobile made by a former multi-billionaire whose last acts were aimed at the creation of a true hero in gray-and-blue…

"…417 in progress at…"

As the daydreaming desires of a highly intelligent pre-billionaire-turned-Batman Robert recalled such from his casual studies of such Police Code told him there was a gun-toting individual evidently threatening another…

"At the risk of sounding like a cliché," this real-world Batman said softly, whilst smiling almost madly. "It's show time."

"Look, my friend," half-pleaded the unarmed man to the one holding a flat-black Glock 9mm. "I didn't know that was your woman when I hit on her the other night. No need to…"

"Shut the hell up, or I'll…!" started the snarling-with-rage man with a gun that had generated the 417 police call picked up by a certain seeming superhero.

RRRRRRRRRR-mmmmmmmmm!

At that self-same instant, causing this Glock-holding individual, as well as his intended target stemming from some unreasoning rage via jealousy, to both turn in the direction of the roar from a race car's engine evidently in a Batmobile from Sixties television…

"What the fu…?"

"Is this some sort'a joke?"

As rage and relief, from gunman and unarmed man, were readily replaced by wide-eyed disbelief, a certain sudden-billionaire-cum-Batman climbed out with more than minor nervousness at doing something most might merely daydream of doing…

"OK, uh, just put away the weapon," warned, in a lukewarm worded challenge by the cowled-and-caped person slowly stepping closer with Bat-gloved hand extended in a gesture suggestive of the surrendering of said handgun. "Or, better yet, give it to me. The police are probably on their way and…"

Suddenly laughing loudly at the thought of this costumed civilian daring to do what would usually be seen on the old "Batman" TV series from the Sixties or on the printed pages of a DC comic book…

"I don't know what the hell you're on," laughed a gunman gradually aiming the Glock at this newest target in cowl-and-cape, "but you're about to become as 'canceled' as that old show!"

Even as such was swiftly taking place, prior to the arrival of a two-man team of uniformed officers in an official NYPD patrol car, the man who had been on the business end of the Glock 9mm came to his senses just enough to escape into the city's heavily shadowed-via-nighttime surroundings, then…

POW!

"Uhn!"

Just as a baptism-by-(gun)fire occurred for a previously nervous Batman in regards to the worn-under-Bat-suit/cowl "dragon skin" protection actually being able to halt a bullet fired from a few feet away…

"Huh…?"

And as the Glock-carrying attacker was stunned by his apparent inability to kill this "freak" with that straight-into-the-chest shot, whilst this real-world crime fighting Batman came to realize no real harm had been done by that 9mm impact…

"Don't say I didn't warn you," he snarled somewhat sinisterly, as he pulled what he had already looked at within the Bat-belt whilst soaring in via his Batmobile from upstate New York.

Then, after tossing such directly in front of the gunman mere moments before a second shot could be unleashed…

Pop-sssssssshhhhhhhhh!

"Gyak!"

And whilst this potential killer coughed from the miniature tear gas bomb, whose extremely potent contents quickly dissipated so Robert-as-Batman could come closer and…

Thump!

Thud!

In a move from movies and television alike, this formerly fretful Batman managed to send the shooter to the sidewalk, while also dislodging said gun in order to eject both magazine and chambered bullet.

WHOO-oooo-WHOO-oooo-WHOO-oooo-WHOO-oooo!

Then, as the siren sound was quickly closing, this Batman hurriedly reentered his Batmobile and, dropping it into Drive and stomping onto the accelerator, squealed quickly away in the absolutely opposite direction, so as not to be booked as the crazily costumed vigilante avenger that he, in point of very real legality, he truly turned out to be.

"I did it," the man in the Batman getup smilingly said as he sped away in what was the original, and readily recognized, Batmobile from a once-popular television series. "I did it! Ha-haaaaa!"

Suddenly swept up in the extreme excitement brought about by combating crime whilst wearing the cowl-and-cape made so famous by Adam West decades earlier, as well as driving, very rapidly!, the honest-to-God Batmobile from that self-same era…

"Let's see what else the police bands can come up with for me to take on tonight," muttered, smilingly still!, this suddenly enlivened Batman as he turned the volume louder on his in-dash device tuned to police calls from anywhere in New York City.

"…possible 211 in progress at…"

"All right," lightly lauded someone who was suddenly more Batman than Robert, whilst swinging the one-and-only Batmobile to his left at a higher-than-normal street speed. "A robbery for the Batman! Yeah."

END OF CHAPTER 3