Disclaimer: The Mentalist, its characters and universe belong to Bruno Heller and CBS. I'm only a fan, writing this for love of this TV show and personal pleasure.

A.N.: This is for 1x16 "Bloodshot," at the end of the episode when Jane recovers his sight. For some reason this came out in present tense, which is not my norm. Oh and thanks for those who left reviews! I'm going to post these mostly chronologically as I write them down.

Loving Him was Red

Hindsight

"You're a jerk, you know that?" Lisbon tells him, crossing her arms as an attempt at being stern, but the smile still on her lips betrays her intentions.

"So I've heard," Jane replies readily, his smile dimming somewhat but present nonetheless.

"I take it your sight is fully back," she says after a moment and he nods in assent.

"Still a little blurry around the edges, but getting better every second now," he clarifies. "But seriously, you have no idea how good it is to see you, Lisbon."

"I'm glad you're better," she tells him, smiling with affection at him. "Do you want to grab breakfast? We could go to that diner you like, with the good eggs. We could talk."

"Are you trying to shrink me, Lisbon?" He narrows his eyes playfully at her. "Because the department has someone that does that and that I'm already supposed to see today, per Minelli's orders."

"Like you're actually going to see him," Lisbon rolls her eyes at him. "I know you, Jane. You'll avoid seeing doctors at any cost. And I'm just worried about you. Thought maybe you'd like someone to talk to, maybe." She finishes by casually putting her hands in the pockets of her pants.

"Well, I am feeling somewhat peckish. Alright, eggs it is then." Jane concedes with a smile as he swiftly gets up to his feet.

Sometime later the two of them are sitting at a table by the window of Jane's favorite diner near CBI HQ enjoying a healthy breakfast.

"You were in rather early," Lisbon comments, bringing her cup of coffee up to her lips. "I thought I told you there was no need to come in today."

"Hmm? Did you?" Jane answers casually, mirroring her movements and also bringing his cup of tea up to his lips for a sip.

"Yesterday was a very hectic day," she says, pursing her lips into a serious line. "It's okay if you want to take the day off. I'm mostly going to do paperwork anyway. Minelli has taken our team off rotation. Rigsby and Van Pelt are out today and Cho is on call if anything comes up. You can go home and rest."

"You're trying to send me away now that I have my sight back and can work properly again?" He retorts with a raised eyebrow and a quiet smile.

"We don't have any open cases right now," she simply shrugs in reply. "You could enjoy the peace and quiet for once."

"I know," he nods in understanding of her line of thought. Jane pauses for a moment, as if deciding if he wants to speak his next words before he does. "I'd just rather be working, keeping myself occupied with something, you know?"

She nods slowly, her eyes searching his face for the answers to the questions in her eyes. "Too many ghosts?"

"Eh. Working through my former client list…" He replies, shrugging casually with a half smile, which vanishes from his lips after a moment. "I got thinking about some things for the first time in years."

"You know Dan Hollenback and his father were wrong, right?" She frowns in concern at him, feeling the need to reassure him. "If he was cheating on his wife all you did was to confirm the suspicions that were already there. You didn't do anything wrong."

"Oh no, I know that. I have no qualms about my readings for Jill Lamont and the fallout of her marriage," he reassures her with a careless wave of his hand. "No, I was thinking about someone else."

"Carol Gentry?" Lisbon prods gently after a moment.

Jane looks up into her eyes, searching for something in them, almost exactly how she did a few moments before. "Yes."

"What happened there?" She asks quietly.

"I misread the situation," he explains, his voice equally quiet. "Actually made things worse, which was not my intention. She despaired and in the end took her own life with a bunch of pills and a bottle of wine." He pauses for a moment, his eyes going down towards his now empty plate. "You know, I'd never deny that I was a charlatan and a fraud and that I was taking advantage of all those people for their money and my own personal merriment. But at same time I did try to help the people who came after me for my 'psychic' abilities. Mostly all they wanted was some form of closure or peace of mind."

"I know," she nods at him and a small smile comes upon her lips. "You were helping them in your own way."

"I'm not so sure about that." He looks back up into her eyes with a self-deprecating smile.

"I don't think you set out to purposefully hurt anyone back then, at least not the way I see it." She tells him gently. Granted, Patrick Jane could at times be something of an insensitive, selfish sadist and she was well aware of that. But Lisbon also often witnesses how he tries to help those who need the most.

"Eh. It depends," he says, shrugging casually. "I'd make my own judgement of their characters. If they had good intentions then so did I. Otherwise… it was fair game."

"Your own brand of justice, I expect." She nods at his words.

"Bingo." He grins at her in reply.

She smiles a little at him and they grow silent for a moment as they finish their drinks. "Do me a favor?" She asks him then and he looks attentively back at her. "Take the day off. You should be resting anyway."

"Nah. I can rest on the couch in your office," he waves her concerns off with a casual hand gesture and a smile.

"Does that mean you're going to help me with the paperwork?" She raises a teasing eyebrow at him.

"Uh, no," he tilts his head a little to the side and frowns up at her like she said something crazy. "It means I'll be resting on the couch in your office while you do paperwork."

Lisbon purses her lips, but she can't quite contain the smile from fully forming on them. She knows this is as much a compromise as she'll get from him at this point, so she takes it. At least she can keep an eye on him and be there in case he needs any help.